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Steps To the Metro

decided to take a look within scary bones fighting trying to escape dim sounds of angels flying just outside my window to places that pissed my bones to go So what i forgot how to see i’m trying desperately So what heels on blocks of concrete fever now just sinking into a lotion of grey lather click clack click clap there's my tribe bowed heads praying yes praying into cells containing minds distracting from reality or maybe fantasy or may be we’ll never know one ever came back to say so So what that I make my bed every day So what no one ever comes to feel the sheets of my stretching So what that no one knows at the metro there was a dusty young girl trying to pull her pant legs up over her waist-ed mind red wild hair that would scare red hair wild glances met she knew my name she floated it as we passed i heard her see when I was there you remember of course, you do And what i heard the clarity in the attempted muffle she stared at me sort of growled i don’t remember choosing this do you how long is this mess supposed to last do you remember standing in that angelic line wait a minute So what i know the place was divine So what but I’m surely pissed So what was I drunk to accept this So what.. you were first to say yes

Copyright © | Year Posted 2018




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Date: 12/9/2020 8:20:00 PM
Great! Love its rhythm.
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Date: 9/9/2019 8:22:00 AM
I travelled with you on this 'trip' down into the metro. Imaginative blending of words as in < I heard her see > Yes hypnotic...ty for sharing :-) Onward....
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Date: 9/8/2019 11:43:00 AM
Just adding my applause to the other comments here. A fascinating hypnotic read. Most excellent.
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Date: 10/28/2018 7:51:00 AM
Hi! Gabrielle, Wonderfully deep verse...So what..:) Sort of reality meets redemption. Your teaching to the people..your words seemingly make me think of my motto.. "there's praise in words and wods in praise: Be Bless nothing else~~James
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Date: 9/9/2018 2:29:00 AM
"not ready to accept the walls of wailed writing" = this made me think of all the irritated people who hate their job, and the gray walls that hate these haters. "click clack click clap" this was the sound of a typewriter in my mind. My mind was flying around with this poem, loving it every jump, hop, and skip, and it was TRAVELING FAST. Wow! Love it!
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Date: 9/8/2018 11:21:00 AM
Life does go on day by day, Until nothing is left to say; Quiet remain, Until insane; Another poem write I may.
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Jordan Avatar
Gabrielle Jordan
Date: 9/8/2018 1:17:00 PM
Hi James, quite it does. I guess we will have to be stewards until there is nothing left to say...Thanks much!
Date: 9/8/2018 2:56:00 AM
You have an amazing way with words! I confess, I don't necessarily understand what all of this poem is about... but I'm nevertheless captivated by the attitude and rhythm of it.
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Mcferran Avatar
Rhona Mcferran
Date: 9/8/2018 10:13:00 AM
Yes, it's usually for the best when they take on that 'life of their own'! ;) There are so many things I love in this piece, (the part about the made-up bed that no one sees... the word-play "wild red hair/ that would scare/ red hair wild"... & the Maya Angelou-like sass of "feeling lucky that/ they are not me/ do they think/ they won the lottery" (& I could go on)... Brilliant!
Jordan Avatar
Gabrielle Jordan
Date: 9/8/2018 7:52:00 AM
Hey Rhona, yet another piece that morphs on its own..to a place it wants to go:) I have made some revisions here. Thank you so much! Have a blessed Saturday!

Book: Shattered Sighs