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Home » High Critique » Echoes

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
9/30/2012 12:46:30 AM

Sharon Morken
Posts: 133
It's buried deep inside me
Feels like know one will ever know,
This ache that starts in my toes,
I'd scream with all my might,
All you'd hear are the echoes


I may smile,
Day by day
Better to be the eagle in the sun
Than drown like a chicken in rain


I thank the above
For pen and paper
Allows me to drain my well
Maybe help someone exfoliate theirshell
edited by svlynn18 on 9/30/2012
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10/2/2012 3:28:34 PM

robert johnson
Posts: 1
svlynn18 wrote:
It's buried deep inside me
Feels like know one will ever know,
This ache that starts in my toes,
I'd scream with all my might,
All you'd hear are the echoes


I may smile,
Day by day
Better to be the eagle in the sun
Than drown like a chicken in rain


I thank the above
For pen and paper
Allows me to drain my well
Maybe help someone exfoliate theirshell
edited by svlynn18 on 9/30/2012
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10/2/2012 4:10:04 PM

Sharon Morken
Posts: 133
It's not showing Roberts feedback on this page
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10/3/2012 1:44:05 PM

Stephen Parker
Posts: 5
svlynn18 wrote:
It's buried deep inside me
Feels like know one will ever know,
This ache that starts in my toes,
I'd scream with all my might,
All you'd hear are the echoes


I may smile,
Day by day
Better to be the eagle in the sun
Than drown like a chicken in rain


I thank the above
For pen and paper
Allows me to drain my well
Maybe help someone exfoliate theirshell
edited by svlynn18 on 9/30/2012
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10/3/2012 1:48:32 PM

Stephen Parker
Posts: 5
You probably need to define what "it" is. Is it: pain, loneliness, low self esteem? The last two lines are revealing, and create nice closure!
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