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3/20/2014 3:47:28 PM Michelle Adams Posts: 2	Hi, Please take a look at my first poem. It literally wrote itself today. It's called The Knight. Tonight I am battling a wizard, Whose potion makes him ill, The transformation from the liquid Holds over his deeds and will. I found the Queen in her bedroom crying A long way from her throne I took her hand and told her, “You’ll never be alone” I felt the ground start to tremble From the yelling of the beast From experience I knew there was no cure Not potion, spell, or priest The only thing that would save us now, This broken Queen and I, Was when the beast finally collapsed And the sun rose in the sky And as we lay and held each other, We settled in for the night, The beast was banging on the door, But it was bolted tight. The wickedness took over, As he shouted through the door, “Come open up, or I swear to God, I will beat you to the floor” Then his tone, it changes, The devil tries to lie “Just open up this door for Daddy, I promise not to make you cry” But the Queen and I are wise, We know the tricks he uses And should we allow this monster in, Tomorrow we will have fresh bruises. We lie and wait, don’t make a peep, Soon we will hear no more motion, And then we will be safe and sound, Until again he has his potion. I kept it childlike for a reason. I would appreciate any feedback on this.
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7/1/2014 4:58:21 AM Kaye Locke Posts: 3	Amazing that this is your first every poem Michelle! It really gives a sense of fear. I think there are one or two issues with meter (what I like to call the tum-te-tum-ness ) but otherwise a really great effort. Well done. Kaye
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