What to Submit?

Write me a classic bawdy limerick. 

The bawdier and funnier it is, the higher you will score.

You must use the classic 9,9,6,6,9 syllable count.

Higher scores will be granted to limericks using pure
anapestic or amphibrachic meter all the way through the poem,
but it is not required.

Anapestic
da-da-DAH da-da-DAH da-da-DAH
da-da-DAH da-da-DAH da-da-DAH
da-da-DAH da-da-DAH
da-da-DAH da-da-DAH
da-da-DAH da-da-DAH da-da-DAH

Amphibrachic
da-DAH-da da-DAH-da da-DAH-da
da-DAH-da da-DAH-da da-DAH-da
da-DAH-da da-DAH-da
da-DAH-da da-DAH-da
da-DAH-da da-DAH-da da-DAH-da

Rhyme scheme must be the classic aabba.
You may use the same word to end line one and line five, 
but it will not score as highly. Tortured rhymes are funnier.

Only one five line limerick. No chains.

New poems only.

Date your poem.

Do not identify yourself in any way.

Example 1

There was an old couple quite wizen
Stark nude in the mirror just risen
Both Larry and Linda
Could see their pudenda
But couldn't tell her'n from his'n

Example 2

A hot redhead there was from Bordeaux
Did she have the red fire down below?
When she let her skirt gape
And the rug matched the drape
It set thirty-five Frenchmen aglow

Prizes

All poems fully meeting the rules will be placed, rankings 1-5.

Have fun!