My Psycho Girlfriend

Written by: Floyd Jackson

She went to a whole other 
place today and guess what? I 
took her there. She starts 
screaming and yelling and 
saying things out of character... 
At this point I'm more confused 
then I've ever been. Like what 
happened to the sweetheart I 
met 6 months ago??? 
Just bought a new car, she 
keyed it. Flat screen tv, she 
broke it. Some shoes I waited 
in line for for 5 hours, she rips 
the tongue off of them. The 
bracelet I bought her, she 
throws it at my head. This all 
started because I wouldn't 
watch her favorite romance 
comedy. Like most men, I 
should run like hell but you 
know what??? I think it's 
adorable. I mean it is my fault 
she's like this. When she gave 
up on love, I made her see 
what she was giving up. When 
she lost her first love, I helped 
her find another one. When her 
first time was horrible, I made 
her last time amazing. I was 
the one that gave her a cheesy 
romance movie beginning. 
Since she has never been 
swept off her feet, I will be all 
the broom she ever needs. So 
to my psycho girlfriend, I 
refuse to apologize because I'm 
going to do you one better. 
When ever you freak out and 
go through an episode like this 
one today I'm just gonna grab 
your face and kiss you like your 
going away on some very long 
business trip. You know... The 
kiss where your toes curl up 
and your socks pop off. Yea 
that kinda kiss. What can I say, 
she's psycho because of me 
and if if that's not the second 
best reward to true love then 
idk what is.