the joys of a slimming club

Written by: Seren Roberts

They promise it is personal
No –one knows your weight
You step trembling on the scales
To hear the awful fate

You’ve put a kilo on she says
With a bell on every tooth
Been a naughty girl have we
We had better take a look

You sit around her on your chair
Waiting for the truth to emerge
You clap the clever ones who lost weight
For you  it will be a dirge

Now then come on admit it
What have we had naughty this week
She goes through your eating list
Me I can hardly speak

Ahh here it is she says triumphantly
You dared to eat some duck
With orange sauce I do not doubt
Geez I thought just my luck

No I said it was the bananas
In milk shake everyday
Cos I had tonsillitis
I just about could say

Just like a child at christmas
I promised to be good
Losing some kilos next week
Just better forget about food.