Gateway to Forgiveness

Written by: Chrissy Pierce-Guzman

I never meant to hurt you!
I would rather die than hurt those closest to me

I am so sorry!!

I can not explain why my own feelings consumed my very soul

I was selfish I know
Only thinking of myself
and my pain at the time

I hurt so bad inside

Resentment...
Bitterness..
Anger..

three emotions took homage in my soul

I felt I was so alone at the time....

I feared reaching out
How could anyone understand?
What I struggled myself to understand


I was so lost
So confused
So misunderstood

My mind played tricks on me

negativity consumed every fiber of my being

I incapable of being positive
Incapable of thinking positive

I was poisoned by evil words of others
and broken in half by hurtful actions

I became someone who I grew to hate

I told myself lies everyday
If I could learn to believe others lies
I felt it would hurt less


I can now look back....

I know I was wrong now....

I am sorry....

I felt I was dealing with the evil that consumed me

I was only causing myself more agony

but I did the best I knew then

I was a baby girl trying to grow up
in a world I felt I never belonged

I am so sorry.....

but my feelings were real them

I wore them on my sleeves

It was how I felt at the time

I just struggled so hard to love myself

But deep down I always loved you

I never meant to hurt you!!

I should have cried on your shoulder

Instead I cried in my room alone

tears falling streaking across a piece of paper

of ink  smeared with so much pain

I trusted an empty sheet of paper
to keep my secrets

When I should have always trusted you!

I should have came to you!!

I am so sorry!!







Chrissy M. Pierce 2012,