Once A year
The family's gathered together and swarmed around the Christmas tree
and even Grandpa Elmer has shaken and rattled the gifts ,you see.
The ham has been glazed to perfection and Mama calls us to the table
but Uncle Fred is floating in eggnog;as for getting up he's just not able!
Grandma's disgusted the young-uns;she pinches the cheeks right off each kid.
Auntie Midge has much to say about the neighbors's secrets they've hid.
Cousin Joe shows up with his girlfriend,a stripper from the local club
and while the family finds their seats,Daddy stumbles home from the pub.
Across from the stuffing and mashed potatoes Mama shoots him a nasty stare.
If looks could kill he'd be dead as a doorknob but Daddy doesn't seem to care.
We bow our heads now to say grace;I look at all the faces dear.
I'm grateful for each wacky one and that Christmas just comes once a year!