I'm Tired

Written by: Eileen Manassian

I’m tired…….
	Tired of smiling when I’m dying inside
		Tired of looking for a safe place to hide
			Tired of loving when I am turned away
				Tired of trying to find right words to say

I’m so tired….
	Tired of always trying so hard to please
		Tired of daily feeling ill at ease
			Tired of feeling that I’m so small
				Tired of just waiting for you to call

I’m so very tired...
	Tired of pretending to be alright
		Tired of crying after one more fight
			Tired of seeing unfulfilled desire
				Tired of failures that put out the fire

I’m so very extremely tired…
	Tired of trying hard to measure up
		Tired of drinking this bitter cup
			Tired of wishing beauty to be mine
				Tired of hoping it will all be fine

God, you know I’m tired…
	Tired of wounding You time after time
		Tired of waiting for heaven sublime
			Tired of longing for perfection in me
				Tired of waiting from guilt to be free

I’m tired…
	Maybe you’ll understand the reasons why
		I want you to know, I really did try
			But I’m shriveled up and empty inside
				There is no place left this raw hurt to hide

I’m tired; I have no strength left to stand
	Guess I’m just too proud to reach for your hand
		I wish I could make you really “see” me
			And not this monster that I’ve come to be

I’m tired; I’ve no charm to make love last
	No magic to erase the sordid past
		I’ve learned that life is cruel, mean and unkind
			Happiness was not for me to find.

I’m tired; I can bring this to an end 
	You know it is too hard this heart to mend
		You know I’m much too tired to try to live
			My last breathe of life is all I can give….