Hidden Deep Within

Written by: Travis Lone Hill

I'm back to my writing, 
I'm back to my thinking, 
I dont know why I keep fighting, 
I don't know why I keep drinking, 

I always think I'm too spiritually weak, 
when I choose to ****ing smoke, 
but even ever more when I take that next drink, 
killing myself ain't no ****ing joke. 
Soon I will be six feet deep, 
I'm down in the reservation gutter finally broke, 
words said softly but nothing meaningful ever spoke. 

I'm back to my writing, 
I'm back to my thinking, 
I dont know why I keep fighting, 
I don't know why I keep drinking, 

Tell me something different Lord! 
Tell me why I grew up so ****ing poor! 
Tell me why I spent time sitting in prison crying to you on a concrete floor! 
Tell me why I can't have what I want in this life in what I truly do adore! 
Tell me why I am doing this when I can be doing that because this *****I'm doing now is a bore!
 
I'm back to my writing, 
I'm back to my thinking, 
I dont know why I keep fighting, 
I don't know why I keep drinking, 

I know the answers I ask are hidden deep within, 
I just have to look past my sins, 
I guess I can be an outlaw of just another outcast laughing at the world with a silent grin,
 I know I can be no hearted in the land of OZ I'm the mother fuking man of tin, 
I know if I would I would do all this *****all over again. 
I used to be the one at the end of the trail with just another loss but this my time to win.
 I know the answers I ask are all hidden deep within.