eyes down back hunched head down
3 x 10,
Contortion grows and pops my veins,
A reflection, a pant, a look to the ground,
Ugly, undeniable, ugly.
Move up and away,
Laughter, gloating, mocking, appropriate,
Rings through my head.
Eyes meet, more contortions forced,
My chest is bigger than before,
My back still scarred though.
He doesn’t look, she doesn’t smile.
I pop another vein,
And get all red in the face,
Did she smile?
Did he look?
My shirt hangs odd,
My hair ruffled, thin at the top,
Nose, straight, too big
Skin, spotty, ripped, embarrassed.
Head down, chest out,
Please don’t prove my confidence.
Into the steam, throw the towel round,
Dress slowly, calm, fortified.
Exit, checking hair in glass.
Through the door, welcomed by wind.
Stones, hurt through my shoes.