miss you

Written by: joy bohland

Denim dresses,
sunshine,
clothes hanging from a clothesline
and I miss you.

Dad and I are getting along just fine
he loves to reminisce bout good 'ol times
and I'm getting better at listening...

I was a happy person who was occasionally sad
but lately I've been slipping back.
Trying to be strong like you'd want me to be,
not a sad person who pretends to be happy.

All the sacrifices you made
everything that you gave 
up for me.
I'm trying to be
a life you'd be proud of,
something to show for what you've done,
a part of you that lives on
but I'm stuck.
I just miss you Mom.

I keep the house clean like you used to.
I run errands I used to run with you.
I watch what Dad eats
cuz he's all I've got.
Then I get in my bed
when I turn out the light
and just cry and cry and cry.

Tomorrow I'll get up
do what needs to be done
and maybe have some fun
after all I'm 22.
Then I'll drive home 
thinking of you
and what I'd say to you 
if I could.
Nothing ever comes 
to mind but...
I miss you Mom

...............

I do want to tell you
the next time I see you
that you'll be proud of me.
I thought I'd lose myself when I lost you
but I know who I am, even without you.
You didn't have to worry.
I'm gonna be strong
when I see you as an adult.
However right now
I am not strong
at all, at all, at all
and I'd kill for your strength
you forgot to give me when you left.
Sometimes I still just can't believe you're gone.
And all I do is miss, miss, miss you Mom.