365 Days

Written by: Drake Eszes

"This is dedicated to all who understand this. Whether we like it or not." -D.J.E.

I wasn’t gonna write this

But

Emotions are stirring high
Cannot believe
How much time has passed

Still feel your presence

Memories
Of the slowest death
Ever felt
Running parallel
To these present seconds

An ugly revelation
Tainted the sunshine
That bared on our souls
365 days ago

So many tears
Had filled the ocean
Of despair
For love’s river
Were held back by presumption’s walls
Uncertainty
The dam’s of what could have been

Here I stand
In this present moment
Your essence still lingers
Like the flakes of a dandelion b r e a k i n g 		f r e e
From its home

Tormented echoes of “why”
“How come”
“Please don’t go”
“I love you…I love you so much”

High pitched resonations
Float upon
Rafts of secondary importance
And yet
This heart still knows

For it will always recall
Its truth

Promises
Empty
Played me a fool
While you held hands
With inevitable

Crossing fingers
With diffusion
Across my shoulders

Left me uncomfortably numb
All my rights
Unreserved

And all the while
I
Simply
Believed

In tomorrow

Because
My foolish hopes
Continued to warp my mind

Maybe if I didn’t look back when you walked away
Like the rules said…
…No matter.

These soft acoustic riffs
Replay in my head
You were my “Wonderwall”
“You could’ve been the one…to save me”

But I overcame
For I
Saved myself

Didn’t want to be an inconvenience for you

Colors of Fall
Your favorite season
Kinda ironic
You were like Summer & Winter

Knew when to turn up the heat
Make me sweat

Each new arrival
A summer equinox
Each departure
A rainstorm

But, when it was over
Nothing but cold
Blizzard languages
Frostbitten
Even solace’s bandages
Could not heal

But, I weathered the storm
And would do it again
Cause it was for real

…

Here I am
52 weeks have past
Occasional recollection
Of that hourglass
With no more sands
Buried in dragon’s chest

You are in my silent prayer
Always

But
Know this

Even though you are contained
Within my heart’s asylum cell block home
I loved you
With all that I had

So much

That you will be the only regret
I will ever be proud of.

© Drake J. Eszes