The Funny Farm

Written by: Ronald Bingham

The love we shared is now no more.
    With bitterness she slammed the door.
She said I've had enough I'm through with you.
   I'm tired she said of the things you do.
You have no respect for me at all.
   And when I talk to you it's like talking to the wall
She said you go ahead and lead your life of fun.
   You're nothing but a low life and a son of a gun.
Those weren't the exact words she used right then.
    She called me everything from being my own next of kin.
That was just a warm up here she comes again.
    All of this started over me letting the cat get in.
Honey I said as I ducked her punch.
    I guess maybe this ain't a good time to ask you to fix some lunch.
I knew she was mad I could tell she was hot.
    But why is she trying to hit me with that cast iron pot.
She got me on the run as I cut my trail.
    Throwing our dishes as her booming voice it did prevail.
As I locked myself behind the bathroom door, I heard the breaking of another plate.
    She started beating and a hollering and predicting my fate.
As I looked around I realized what I had done.
    I just laid down on the floor waiting for her to go and get my gun.
I laid there for an hour or two.
    Not really sure just what to do.
Well I finally got brave and took a peek.
   I didn't see her around so out the door I did sneak.
Into the kitchen there she stood with a smile on her face.
   She walked over to me and gave me the longest embrace.
She said I made my little sugar burger a cake, his favorite kind.
    She said I'm sure glad I married you you're such an awful good find.
Oh, and by the way that moody thing the doc says it will take awhile but I will be okay.
    Going through the change just a normal day.