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IN RED'S SILENT FURY

nette onclaud Avatar nette onclaud - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled IN RED'S SILENT FURY which was written by poet nette onclaud. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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IN RED'S SILENT FURY


Metallic city howls like a wounded animal scraped by nocturnal vigils of grandchildren and elders emaciated like tuberculosis lungs gasping from chug-chugs of tobacco soot... and the face of a night is hammered by ripped moans like plucked strings in motel rooms; pagan women opening limbs for a meal in silent fury. This is the other side of town... beggars peddling hope; factory shoulders ranting over shuffled cards and fired gin as wives’ blistered fingers clean rented pots, gibbering same monotone of hymn, “give us daily bread, daily bread”. Outside, the pier coughs off the commercial honks of weighed cargo reeked with labor’s perspiration, where pawnshops buzz with greed's snicker... the evening owl attempts winks under the grime of bloodied moon… it spits the larynx of tenants’ raged hoots wishing morsels of fresh sunset would pour some grace of life’s salve, before the shrill of red sets in... again.
Color of Sound Contest/ Monterey Sirak by nette onclaud

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  1. Date: 12/12/2013 7:43:00 PM

    Amazing, Nette! Congrats!

  1. Date: 12/12/2013 11:43:00 AM

    Way to go with the sound of color..Congrats..Sara

  1. Date: 12/12/2013 5:56:00 AM

    Reply to your repy to my reply to your...Oh well, you know what I mean...Soup Mail

  1. Date: 12/11/2013 7:10:00 PM

    You just keep pumping out the masterpieces. Congrats on another Win...Roger

  1. Date: 12/11/2013 8:37:00 AM

    nice win...luv...Linda

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 9:47:00 PM

    Congrats on the win, nette

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 9:39:00 PM

    Wow Nette...I LOVE to see this gritty, dark side of you! This reminds me of Subic Bay when I was stationed there but I assume it is about the ghettos of Manila or some other large city? The last line is a true stunner. 'the shrill of red'...WOW

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 5:42:00 PM

    Nette.....CONGRATULATIONS!!!

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 3:54:00 PM

    wow, an amazing poem< nette. BIG congrats on your well deserved win.

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 11:58:00 AM

    An exceptional write from the start Nette, congratulations on your winning poetry love xxx

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 11:15:00 AM

    - Congratulations on your winning poem in: "THE SOUND OF COLOR" contest: Sponsored by: Monterey Sirak - Nice to join and nice to read your poem Nette. - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 9:57:00 AM

    What can I say to a masterfully creative piece like this? Your images are stunning and powerful. I could imagine the scene and hear the furious moaning, gasping, and howling. Awesome! Congrats on your win and thank you for entering.

  1. Date: 12/10/2013 9:23:00 AM

    Congratulations on your first place win in the Sound of Color contest! This is really an amazing poem, Nette. Hugs <3

  1. Date: 11/22/2013 4:40:00 PM

    nette, wonderful poem.great. (: ) Jenish.

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 6:12:00 PM

    Nette..I must echo pretty much what Richard said...and others too...I'll have to read this again....after the tears have cleared...this just came out of your soul and into words...

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 5:37:00 PM

    Wow this is deep, very powerful, very sad. Amazing job, Nette, you are an awesome poet.

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 2:20:00 PM

    a very deeply penned beautifully written piece

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 11:05:00 AM

    OMG, harsh truths and reality we try to close our eyes from. There are slums in every part of the world and we'd rather keep mum about it. But you chose to give a brazen voice to this with blunt and evocative images. I praise you, Nette as I take deep breaths!

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 8:41:00 AM

    This poem made me think of Drake in the imagery and metophors you used. I have to say this really impressed and moved me. I will have to read this one over and over to absorb all the imagery. Outstanding piece! A poet could write a lifetime and never write such an amazing piece. You should be very proud.777777777777777fav!

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 1:47:00 AM

    A very powerful write, Nette...good work.

  1. Date: 11/19/2013 12:06:00 AM

    HEART BREAKING! Your poem, with its vividly emotional content, added to making this a first class work.To feel the hunger , dire need, and agony of poverty in every man, child, woman is mind-blowing. You finally gave the less forunate a name, Nette. How brave of you.

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 5:23:00 PM

    Dear Nette, This is my second comment on this poem today. I deleted the first, for fear that I was unable to convey what I really wanted to say, so I'll just say that this is beautiful. Thank you for this poem that really makes us think about how fortunate we are.

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 5:15:00 PM

    Yes, this poem expresses those on the other side of the tracks, the side at which I should be on but am blessed to have what I do have! This is such an emotional write my friend, filled with a flair of the poor, and them not even realizing that they are this way, it's just life to them, what they must endure to go on! A beautiful piece my friend, I really enjoyed reading this immensely glorious poem this evening, Great Work!!

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 1:11:00 PM

    I can really feel the pain through the beggars..the wives..the labourers but mostly the pain of those who have to open limbs just to survive.Unjust is this world sweet Nettie.When i read these verses i feel ashamed of my luck and for not being there..cause these people are human like i am.A favourite and huggs..Tnks fpr stopping by.

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 1:08:00 PM

    Oh, Man! When you hit on it, you hit it hard! This an explosive description in "the day of a life" of people from the poor side of town.Your way of creating both the physical and emotional world is so unsettling, and I love it---- the details,the mood, the despair! Only you can get away with this, Nette. Priceless poetry!

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 11:56:00 AM

    This was very, very heavy. Grim, visceral, & intensely thought-provoking. Incredible.

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 11:25:00 AM

    - Very deep and emotional poem, dear Nette. - Well done ! - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 10:54:00 AM

    Griity work here. Stark images add to the poem's power. Thank you for your kind words. Peace & Love Matthew Anish

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 10:44:00 AM

    Such depth in feeling lives within your lines. I agree with Sara, like one who has witnessed such events. Nicely penned as always love. Wishing you a wonderful week. Hugs and love, Gail

  1. Date: 11/18/2013 10:35:00 AM

    The emotion pours forth from this work like one who has seen some very sad and possibly evil events ...Enjoyed reading it today.Thanks for the visit to my page..Sara