I dedicate this poem to you,
The one who I used to call "friend",
"Best friend", or maybe even "sister".
Yes, you meant that much to me,
And I thought I meant as much to you.
No, maybe not as much, but at least a "best friend".
Did I ask for too much?
Was that too selfish of a request?
I thought that we'd be best friends forever,
I really did.
But I guess it was all just a fantasy,
A fragment of my imagination.
After all, reality is a much harsher place.
I think I only realized that after you walked away;
After you walked away and never looked back
And left me in a deep, dark pit of torment,
Wondering why you'd changed.
If I'd done something different, would you still be the same?
Of all the people beside me, I never would have guessed that
You would be the one to leave me like this.
And as I watched from a mile away,
How well off you seemeed without me,
I fell into a sea of depression.
For the longest time,
I felt so lonely,
Questioning myself whether anyone truly needed me.
Or was I only just second choice?
Now, as I am writing this poem,
I cannot say that I have been completely healed.
I still feel the doubt, the uncertainty,
When someone says
"I love you"
"You are my best friend"
Even when I know that it is all in my head.
But I think I can say with confidence that
I have become stronger,
Even if just a little bit,
Even though sometimes
I still miss you.