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Skinny Girl Wants More

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Below is the poem entitled Skinny Girl Wants More which was written by poet Katie Pukash. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Skinny Girl Wants More

You will be standing in front of your closet
climbing to get to the top shelf
because that is where you hid your five dollar scale from Fred Meyer.
You will take it down and set on some hard surface
because you know that scales on carpets don’t give an accurate reading.
Your naked.
Your eyes look down,
passing the hip bones and knobby knees and strength you have yet to see,
your eyes go straight to the number.
79.
5 feet, two inches tall.
You will think to yourself, “Mother, I never meant to be this way.”
Because when you have fasted for over a week, 
you don’t know who you are anymore.
You have stood in front of the artillery tanks
taking bullets straight into your stomach
as if they would feed you,
as if stars could be extracted from your hands.
But there is only bones.
Not enough women to have a reflection in a mirror.
My doctor told me my heart rate was dangerously low,
that I could chose to go to the hospital
or some inpatient center in Arizona.
I chose the latter.
And once you’ve been in a center for emaciated girls
you don’t know what it is like to be alive.
Because the chapel around the corner
wasn’t filled with cobwebs
and the hymns of children were cries for help
spelling out c-r-why is this happening to me.
Why are my knees scared with hardwood engravings?
as I hung my head over the porcelain devil
purging out all the humiliations and mutilations 
that this world as given to me. 
And I can’t blame the world anymore
because responsibility equals sincerity 
and skinny girl like me has fought fruitfully 
with fat fists 
with a fat heart
with fat lungs
and fat bones
and never mind the stereotypes of others
because skinny girl is anorexic
but not anymore
and you can laugh all you want 
but this skinny b**** wants more
and I want to see the world
taste the tears of those who got caught slapping my face
who got caught laughing because I was a disgrace
to my sister
to my family
but I know they love me. 
Skinny girl not shallow
Anorexia.
Disease.
You may think less of me.
But F*** you.
Go for F*** yourself.
Because this girl has much more to stand for. 



 

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  1. Date: 8/11/2013 11:31:00 PM

    Hi Katie, I think I may have given you the wrong impression, my wife is the team leader and has studied and practiced in this field for many years. As a result I have read a number of articles and have seen her present and develope tools. Some of my poems have been added to their learning materials. I will look you up on utube. I wish you well in the competition.

  1. Date: 8/8/2013 12:15:00 PM

    This is powerfully riveting. You have gone deeper into this subject than anything I could ever imagine...amazing ...congratulations on your well deserved win :)

  1. Date: 8/8/2013 2:12:00 AM

    Riveting piece of writing Katie...I can't imagine what this disease must be like, but you have looked the truth straight in the eye and told it...Congratulations - Tim

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 6:32:00 PM

    I can see this was an excellent choice for people to write about. Girls hold onto so much pain. I'm glad you could tell us, let it out, God bless. Congrad's on your win. Light & Love

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 7:05:00 AM

    Hi Katie, thanks for your comment. What is Nps in Boston? Part of the reason your poem resonated so deeply is that my wife runs an eating disorder program that she started 16 years ago here in kelowna. Through her I have learned a lot about this disorder especially when she was writing her thesis which was the Recovery from Anorexia from the perspective of women who had recovered. Thanks again for this emotionally relevant piece.

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 12:58:00 AM

    Thank You EVERYONE for the wonderful comments! -Katie

  1. Date: 8/6/2013 8:28:00 AM

    Congratulations on your strong winning poem! Laura

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:02:00 PM

    Congratulation my dear!

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 7:42:00 PM

    The very first poem I read for my contest. You set the bar really high. Congratulations, one of the very best entries!

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 1:56:00 PM

    Katie, what a wonderful write, congratulations for your worthy win Peter

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 10:32:00 AM

    You will get more, Katie, because you're strong and strong-willed. No mind about others. Do this for yourself. An awesome poem and an awesome win. Congrulations, my friend. Licia :-)

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 10:24:00 AM

    - Congratulations on a wonderful first place, Katie! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:47:00 AM

    Katie, a wonderful win...SKAT

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:33:00 AM

    not my cup of tea but still Congrats!

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:27:00 AM

    Congrats, Katie, on your powerful write and win in Richard's contest. I feel with you...People are cruel and heartless.....If it weren't for all the demands of society for us to look a certain way....fat girls, think girls, medium sized girls...would all feel loved and wouldn't want more! Hugs!

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:25:00 AM

    Very deep emotional write...congratulations on your excellent win....<3cheriex

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 9:06:00 AM

    congrats on your win Shadow x smiles

  1. Date: 8/5/2013 8:58:00 AM

    Hello Katie, it is a very nice and deep win... Congratulations in Richard's "Girl Rising." contest.... always *LINDA

  1. Date: 7/19/2013 12:44:00 PM

    Rich draged me in. but i was intrigued by the first three quarters. the last profane section turned me off.

  1. Date: 7/17/2013 7:40:00 AM

    This was so well done I had to look up who wrote it. Thanks for entering my contest. Soup mail.

  1. Date: 6/8/2013 3:10:00 PM

    I found you under the 'Slam Poetry' listing...I was sucked in to this from the first line - Tim

  1. Date: 6/2/2013 7:28:00 AM

    This was a very riveting piece. Striking words, with a very strong message.