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More Somewhat Twisted Thoughts for the Day Concerning Precipitation

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Below is the poem entitled More Somewhat Twisted Thoughts for the Day Concerning Precipitation which was written by poet Tim Ryerson. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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More Somewhat Twisted Thoughts for the Day Concerning Precipitation

Safety tip: NEVER venture outside when it’s raining cats and dogs
The last time it rained cats and dogs the county workers were NOT amused
It rained cats and dogs during a drought and the FARMERS were not amused

When Gene Kelly sang in the rain he got arrested for disturbing the peace
So Donald O’Conner had to take over and HE got arrested for public intoxication
So they asked Debbie Reynolds and she said, ‘You have GOT to be kidding... I just got my hair done’ 

Every time it rains, it rains pe…Ouch (THAT’S gonna bruise)
Just my luck…It rained pennies from heaven and I forgot to turn my freekin' umbrella upside down
Due to inflation in now rains quarters from heaven (Dude, you seen the price of UMBRELLAS lately?)

Sure wish it would rain on somebody ELSE’S parade for a change
Once it HAILED on my parade (The floats sustained irreparable damage and there were minor injuries)
Nobody’s gonna rain on MY pa…(Uh, God…You forgot to clear this with Mother again didn't you?)

5/27/2013
Francine’s contest 

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  1. Date: 6/14/2013 6:20:00 AM

    I loved every moment of this! Tim, you crack me up....good stuff.

  1. Date: 5/30/2013 3:23:00 PM

    Clever story weaving, Tim Love how you have included folk language And pop culture. Should be a Winner, Love, SuZ

  1. Date: 5/30/2013 3:12:00 PM

    I really enjoy your lighthearted ones like this, TIm. great fun to see your take on rainy day proverbs!!

  1. Date: 5/30/2013 12:11:00 PM

    First time browsing through your poems... love your quirky style. It is so refreshing to read such talent in a 'tongue-in -cheek' way. xx

  1. Date: 5/28/2013 7:03:00 AM

    You crack me up, Tim! Your witty humour gets me everytime. I especially loved the bit about inflation and quarters :)

  1. Date: 5/27/2013 9:59:00 AM

    You just won't quit on this topic will you? Definitely the longest title I've ever seen for a uhmm... poem? Is that what this is called? Well whatever it's called it's darn good writing... I don't see one rain metaphor left abandoned. You're too much fun!

  1. Date: 5/27/2013 9:41:00 AM

    Soooooo funnnn !!! You took this contest and ran out in the freakin' rain with it!! (I can almost picture you pole dancing ala Gene Kelly......and loving every minute !! ) great job!!! (Can I play the part of Debbie.....?? I do love to dance, and can tip a sofa anyday, with two good partners!)