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I'm Sick to the Core

Eileen Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled I'm Sick to the Core which was written by poet Eileen Manassian. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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I'm Sick to the Core

I’m sick of this world
Sick to the core
And I can’t forgive
Or pretend anymore

I smile but I’m crying
I am through being kind
I hate people playing
Around with my mind

I know I’m naive
I know I’m a fool
But it’s hard to see
How you can be cruel

You just carry on
Pretend I’m ok
When all that I want
Is to end this day

I just want to hide
I want to break free
From all who torment
And who torture me

I’ve just had enough
Enough of these tears
Enough of this life
Enough of these fears

It’s just too damn hard
To get it all right
To deal with this hurt
To sleep through the night

My heart is broken
This isn't a joke
I guess it happened
From all that you spoke

You didn't say sorry
You just walked away
You think I’m a stone…
Or some game to play

I’m heaving with sobs
I struggle, and cry
Try to understand
Your sick reason why

Want to crawl in bed
And lock myself in
What you’ve done to me
Is surely a sin

I’m sick, I’m alone
You’ve gouged out my heart
Go and now and sleep tight
While I fall apart.

Eileen Manassian Ghali

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  1. Date: 5/8/2013 3:54:00 PM
    As for me, I love you Just the Way you Are!

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/9/2013 2:11:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Well...that is a LOAD off my shoulder! ;) You now the song, right? Thanks, my dear. You're very sweet and kind.
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 3:53:00 PM
    Eileen.. I will not preach you about life since you are a church person.. I will shower you with compliments so they will not be taken as a compensation for my past folly.. All I can confess is that I can feel your utter truthfullness in every word and line.. and more than that, your grief is pouring right into my eyes and heart. And one more thing, you are not really alone.. if you looked carefully around, i am sure you will fail to count the people who adore you. ---

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/9/2013 2:10:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Guru Jad....I am so happy to read this and know that you understand. I know you do. Going to church doesn't guarantee a life without pain. If the connection with God is faulty...then we suffer the most. I need to work on that. I know I'm not alone. I value and appreciate your friendship immensely. If that weren't the case, I wouldn't have said what I did! ;) Take care. Waiting to read another one from you.
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 12:14:00 PM
    A poem that contains disappointment and pain. It is accurately written, on what concerns your current thoughts and condition; although the disenchantment (I hope and perceive) is temporary and the sun will shine again. Very good work.

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 12:16:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Yes, Giorgio...I have weathered the storm. Thanks ever so much for your post. I appreciate hearing from you.
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 10:43:00 AM
    Eileen, I ran out of room so i'll send you 2 comments. Chef sending Kenny to 36 countries to learn the cuisines. I know when Harry writes Poetry it is true life things he has been through. Your poem is so much like that. You are very good at rhyming and writing what You feel.this is a great poem. Respectfully, Flipper

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 12:00:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    WOW! Lucky Kenny! Thank you for your kind compliment! I appreciate it! :) Have a great day...Flipper? You know there was a program about a dolphin named Flipper, right? ;)
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 10:27:00 AM
    Good Morning Eileen, I can feel the sadness in this.Is it true?I hope not you seem so undeserving of such pain. Chef has also taught us about poetry. I'm not his best student,that would be Kenny. He has 4 poems on POETRYSOUP. Chef is paying for his world tour learning the different cuisines aroud the world. Kenny is in France now and 2 years he goes to Italy.One of Chef's dreams was to become the 8th Black-hat chef in the world but Health stop him.Kenny said he wanted to so Chef is sending

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 11:59:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Hi! Your morning is my night! How are you? Yes...this was written when I was in a dark place, but I'm out of it for now! Going to enjoy the good times while they last. I don't know who Kenny is. If you give me a last name, I'll look him up.
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 6:10:00 AM
    So much pain here, Eileen. I'm afraid I'm not nearby but you can cry on my soup shoulder if you need to. So much great poetry comes from pain...and this is really good...Caleb

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 11:58:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Caleb...your never as far away as you think! I might need that strong shoulder sometime! I'll let you know! :)
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 4:11:00 AM
    I weep for you, Eileen...You have expressed your pain in a very compelling and eloquent way...You are a beautifu lady, inside and out and you deserve much better...Blessings to you - Tim

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 11:57:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Tim....your post touched my heart. Thank you for the love and care! Bless your heart, Tim!
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 12:56:00 AM
    Eileen, I'm not going to see Chef until 6PM to night Wed. I Know the Chef, if he's not talking about, food,food service or restaurants: he is talking about POETRYSOUP, and his SOUP Family. Out of respect for You I want to say I am trying to say Harry. I Know him as a Chef a Teacher a Philosopher You Know as a POET,so when I say Chef I mean Harry or what ever other names he uses; Liege,HG, Sharon Barre ( although I have not found any of his POEMS on ( POETRYSOUP .) Respectfully, Flipper

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/8/2013 2:18:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Hi Flipper...sorry couldn't respond sooner...I was in class. I love Poetry Soup as well....lovely people here. So...Chef is a philosopher. Give him my love when you see him. Do take care of yourself and him. God bless.
  1. Date: 5/8/2013 12:50:00 AM
    Eileen, I'm not going to see Chef until 6PM to night Wed. I Know the Chef, if he's not talking about, food,food service or restaurants: he is talking about POETRYSOUP, and his SOUP Family. Out of respect for You I want to say I am trying to say Harry. I Know him as a Chef a Teacher a Philosopher You Know as a POET,so when I say Chef I mean Harry or what ever other names he uses; Liege,HG, Sharon Barre ( although I have not found any of his POEMS on ( POETRYSOUP .) Respectfully, Flipper

  1. Date: 5/7/2013 11:33:00 PM
    Eileen, I gave You a 7 rating,this time Last time I left a "rating" I'm impressed with the Swiftness of time You have answered my answer to You. My name is Phillip Rollings I have known Chef since 2006. I am now the head chef at Resort in Maine I see we have the same look of RESPECT for Chef, You know him as HG,Harry or Liege or any combination I'm going to read this poem and comments and tomorrow I will do a real comment to YOU. Its a pleasure to meet YOU, Phillip (flipper) Rollings

  1. Date: 5/7/2013 8:26:00 PM
    Eileen, Chef asked me to say Thank-YOU for the comment.He appreciates it. He will write YOU after he gets home.Respectfully Phillip

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:43:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks, Philip. I've written a response on Harry's poem, but in case you check back here, please let him know that he is in my thoughts. I hope that he will be able to deal with this difficult time in his life by God's grace and help! Thank you for letting me know and please keep me posted.
  1. Date: 5/7/2013 4:26:00 PM
    For a while you had me worried there, Eileen. You're a very strong writer and manage to make your own dark feelings very real to the reader. Whew!! Nice one, my eloquent friend. :)

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:45:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Delysia, you are a dear sweet friend. Thank you for your post. I needed to vent, and I'm glad I could write out my hurt and frustration. I'm better now....somehow. I struggle with depression, so often...I just need to wait for the storm clouds to pass. Thanks for being a ray of sunlight! Hugs!!
  1. Date: 5/7/2013 3:29:00 PM
    Huge hug. That's all I've got.

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:45:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Drake, hugs are sometimes more powerful than words. I received your hug, and am grateful for it! :) Right back at ya!
  1. Date: 5/7/2013 11:41:00 AM
    I am glad you are currently not deling with this emotion. Thanks for the explanation. Hugs

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:42:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Richard, I am not currently crying over it, but I think my feelings towards this issue remain the same. :( I need to toughen up...I need to let go...I need to move on. t=Thanks for the hugs. I sure need them.
  1. Date: 5/7/2013 5:00:00 AM
    - Hi Eileen, a skillful poem ..... embrace the day .... it's yours! - The sun always shines on the nice girls. - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:46:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    :) The sun sometimes plays hide and seek with the nice girls too, Anne Lise! Thanks for lifting my spirit. Hugs your way! :)
  1. Date: 5/7/2013 12:59:00 AM
    I owe you all an explanation. I know you all posted out of a genuine concern for me. You don't know how much that means. Yes, this came from my brokenness. I don't now how many tissues I had to get through just to get those feelings out. I was in a moment of pure self loathing for being too caring and needy. People may not mean to hurt, but for a sensitive soul...things are difficult to bear, especially when there is no acknowledgement of wrongdoing! Hubby is back, so that helps! :) Love you all!

  1. Date: 5/6/2013 11:45:00 PM
    I echo Ilene's comment. It feels to authentic to be "made from thin air". I don't know what you're going through, but I'm here if you need me. A big contrast from your previous one... keep staying strong!

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:47:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Knowing you are there is a comfort, Timothy! Thanks for being a good friend.
  1. Date: 5/6/2013 5:32:00 PM
    i'm really hoping that this is fiction, but it feels very real and so sad. it's very powerful and beautifully written, though. feel better...

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:48:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    No fiction, my dear, but I'm better now. :) Thanks for the support.
  1. Date: 5/6/2013 3:14:00 PM
    What a write! This one speaks to me. . .really powerful words. I am impressed, great honesty. Always,' Laura

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:49:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks, Laura. If we never expression the hurt and pain, we can't go through the process of healing, right? Glad you could connect with this. Hugs.
  1. Date: 5/6/2013 2:31:00 PM
    You seem to have hit a particularly rich seem of nuggets Eileen. This is sad but unfortunately a place many find themselves in. The mating game is rarely easy. A forceful write about one of humanities greatest faults. Take care, Richard

    Manassian Avatar Eileen Manassian
    Date: 5/7/2013 9:51:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Richard, I told you a downpour was on the way, didn't I? Better now...the storm has passed...temporarily. It always comes back, Richard. BTW...hubby isn't the culprit. He's been a good boy. Thanks for the post.
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