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Wanting to Feel Again

Jessica K Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Wanting to Feel Again which was written by poet Jessica K. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Wanting to Feel Again

I gave in again
After holding back so long
Retreating to my old habits
Carving messages on my arm

It's hard to admit now
Because I have such a good life
Yet I've lacked the urge to feel
 Like a black hole swirling inside

Each night, raising the silver
As it colors me red
Digging to find emotions again
While allowing the blade to shred

I believe we were made for more
Than going through life unhappy
So I'd rather slice up my arm like cake
than live life as a zombie

It's not that I really want to cut
But the pain is strong to entice
And the endorphins that kick in: 
savoring 
Though my wrist must pay the price

So i'll continue my routine
Soaked deep in a stained sleeve
But Shhh okay, they still think I'm 
happy
So lets keep this between you and 
me

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  1. Date: 3/20/2013 12:45:00 PM

    You have great use of expression. A very powerful piece with much emotion. Have enjoyed reading your work, hope to read more soon. Em :)

  1. Date: 2/23/2013 7:56:00 AM

    Jessica you write too well to destroy yourself...David

  1. Date: 2/18/2013 9:27:00 PM

    You'll probably end up with a husband that beats you. And people will wonder why you won't leave.

  1. Date: 2/13/2013 7:23:00 AM

    Hope that is "just" a poem, and that you not are sad Jessica. - A touching and very well written poem! - I wish you a nice day. - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 2/12/2013 11:33:00 AM

    Some would call this self therapy self mutilation, I would say cutting is a method to achieving self awareness Jessica - no shame in that - at least you appreciate your blood - J.A.B. %

  1. Date: 2/11/2013 9:06:00 PM

    !!!