Submit a Poem
Get Your Premium Membership
spacer
Pinterest button
Comments Inbox

 

Food

Food

What do you eat
When you eat what you like
Here are some clues
From your pal Uncle Mike

	Mushrooms
According to the FDA
Maggots and mites are really OK
While maggots won’t hurt you
They’re not appetizing
And flavor of mites is really surprising
So pick them yourself
Make sure they’re OK
And don’t leave this task
To the old FDA

	Chewing Gum
Gum contains lanolin
And that comes from wool
It’s an oily secretion
And that is no bull
So each time you chew
You’re chewing sheep sweat
And that is as gross
As your chewing can get

	Vanilla Ice Cream
If you read the label
You may see castoreum
And that’s a secretion
From a beavers old bum
The FDA says
It is generally safe
But its use in my ice cream
Just makes me chafe
“Natural flavoring” is how it is listed
The FDA’s humor
I would say is quite twisted


Please Login to post a comment
 
  1. Date: 1/9/2013 9:19:00 PM

    Mike, wow...did you say maggots are an FDA food... I'm looking at the FDA warning on my food next time... thank you mike.. for the smile...LINDA

    dailey Avatar mike dailey Date: 1/10/2013 12:27:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Canned mushrooms are a good place to find maggots. If there are "over 20 or more maggots of any size per 100 grams of drained mushrooms" or "five or more maggots two millimeters or longer per 100 grams," the FDA will pay attention.
  1. Date: 1/9/2013 5:20:00 PM

    i don't know where you got these facts but i love the way you've written about them! very funny!

    dailey Avatar mike dailey Date: 1/9/2013 5:57:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I am so glad you understand that these poems do contain facts or as close to facts as I can find. I may stretch the truth when it comes to circumstances in the poems but facts are facts. Thanks for stopping by for a read.
  1. Date: 1/9/2013 9:39:00 AM

    funny in a scary way ... liked this =)

    dailey Avatar mike dailey Date: 1/9/2013 5:57:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Truth is often scary - I like it like that. Thanks for stopping by for a read.