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Haiku Two

Richard Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux - LIFETIME Premium Member Richard Lamoureux - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Haiku Two which was written by poet Richard Lamoureux. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Haiku Two

His neck cocks forward
lonely voice reverberates
The first Loonie Tune


SKAT's any Haiku will do contest.

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  1. Date: 3/25/2013 12:40:00 AM
    After reading this I thought of a baby watching his first Looney Tune cartoon... but then I read you and Andrea's conversation and was surprised by how far off I was... the "cocking of head" made me think of babies... haiku can be quite mind-teasers sometime!

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 3/25/2013 7:27:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    It was a play on words. I did enjoy watching loonie toons as a child.
  1. Date: 1/3/2013 12:13:00 PM
    Hmm, this could be either about a real loonie cartoon or a clever piece on a loon of the night. In any event, I love the cute visual.

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/3/2013 2:45:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    I was describing an actual Loon but I do find the last two reactions amusing.
  1. Date: 1/3/2013 10:14:00 AM
    Didn't see it, but can imagine. You might be talking of a D.C. politician though. They are all Lonnie Tunes and Merry Melodies. Love, daver

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/3/2013 10:31:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Hey Daver you have a good point there lol
  1. Date: 1/2/2013 8:14:00 PM
    Hi Richard, gotta love this one, great Haiku my friend. Rollo

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/2/2013 9:01:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks Rollo, still not sure if I got this form right.
  1. Date: 1/2/2013 7:27:00 PM
    Beautiful image you portray here Richard, I enjoyed your haiku, xxx

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/2/2013 9:00:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Mystic Rose, happy new year and thanks for the visit.
  1. Date: 1/2/2013 6:16:00 PM
    I would say the subject of this is the loon? the fragmented line is the hardest to compose [like the last line..the punch line of a limerick] with this fragment you are to use an extra bit of sensory info to draw the reader into the moment, the scene...what you have here is a subjective write, where in haiku we seek to be object. There is more info here on you than on the image of the loon, listing this as senryu IF its about you and not the loon would be safer?

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/2/2013 6:27:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    have a look again and see what you think.
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi
    Date: 1/2/2013 6:19:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    [the loon/cries out in the night -- a soft smile] the marks indicate the next phrase is the ahHA the surprise shift of image and extra input about becuase you don't use them the reader is not sure if you or the loon is the subject [my breath rises/ and falls in the moonlight-- a loon calls]
  1. Date: 1/2/2013 5:54:00 PM
    Interesting Haiku..I think that it would be interesting to actually hear a Loon in real life..I heard them on a movie once..They have a very interesting call..Sara

    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 1/2/2013 6:29:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    they are quite beautiful. Very prevelent in Canada. We have the Loon on our Dollar Coin, It is refered to as a Loonie.