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she walked

she walked stiff legged
balancing with difficulty...
wearing stilettoes 


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  1. Ellison Avatar
    Jack Ellison
    Date: 11/27/2012 4:22:00 PM
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    Have never understood why women would torture themselves so. Harry suggested it must be like walking on a tight rope... I agree! Love and hugs, Jack xox
  1. Sivey Avatar
    Russell Sivey
    Date: 11/27/2012 4:02:00 PM
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    Fabulous job my friend! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this delightful and fun poem this evening! Great work !!
  1. horne Avatar
    jack horne
    Date: 11/27/2012 2:42:00 PM
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    lol, had a chuckle picturing this
  1. Yeates Avatar
    Owen Yeates
    Date: 11/27/2012 10:43:00 AM
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    Hi sara vanity I think but great senryu my friend, all the best Owen
  1. Orozco Avatar
    Edward Orozco
    Date: 11/27/2012 8:53:00 AM
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    I like it.
  1. Guzzi Avatar
    Debbie Guzzi
    Date: 11/27/2012 8:31:00 AM
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    The primary difference between haiku & senryu is TONE, a senryu is often witty or satirical & unlike haiku, senryu do not include a kireji (cutting word), and do not generally include a kigo, or season word. Having man in the write doesn't necessarily make the 3 lines a senryu..above you have written a theme appropriate for a senryu BUT with an attempt at a cutting word [difficulty] which breaks the write into 2 parts, a common haiku format..so for me this is more haiku-like

    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 11/27/2012 8:38:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    IF you tweaked it a wee bit you could push it diffently one way or the other [you MUST stay in the present tense] [the child walks/ stiff-legged across the floor /in stilettoes] diffinetely a senryu now because its FUNNY & 1 part not 2
  1. Gorelick Avatar
    Barbara Gorelick
    Date: 11/27/2012 7:32:00 AM
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    How do they walk on those things? Must be in pain after a few minutes..what we wont do for vanitys sake. Good one! BG
  1. horsman Avatar
    harry horsman
    Date: 11/27/2012 7:02:00 AM
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    i see a tightrope here Sara, a balancing act indeed, good one ...
  1. Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
    Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
    Date: 11/27/2012 6:41:00 AM
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    I would love to have a go at wearing a pair but I am sure one need to join a cicus first. great Senryu Sara xx


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