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About This Poem

Crazy Thoughts No 5

It's been estimated that at any one time
One per cent of the world is drunk
Actually thought it'd be a whole lot higher
My friends are always drunk as a skunk

World's shortest man was 20 inches tall
Had to have his Jockeys specially made
Wives want more sex in their romance novels 
Guys have got it made in the shade

Half of Americans over age fifty-five
No longer possess their own choppers
Be careful if you get into a fight with one
They'll gum you to death right proper

In a average lifetime, humans usually eat
About sixty thousand pounds of food
That's equal to the weight of six elephants
Or 300 people in the nude

The average person walks the equivalent
Of twice round the world 'fore they die
No wonder we all feel so totally run down
Pretty amazing between you and I

© Jack Ellison 2012

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  1. Date: 11/17/2012 7:40:00 PM

    Jack, now I know!

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison Date: 11/17/2012 8:40:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Happy I was able to pass along this vital information, Sherese! LOL Big hugs, Jack xox
  1. Date: 11/16/2012 9:52:00 PM

    LOL... You sure have an unusual way of seeing things... PS .I wrote.a poem 'Biker Dude' for my Dad. He thought it sounded more like my brother... LOL

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison Date: 11/17/2012 5:10:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Yup! Some say my humour is a wee bit strange! Always been considered a bit off centre... probably enjoying life more now than ever before! Love, Jack xox
  1. Date: 11/16/2012 7:38:00 AM

    Don't fancy yours for lunch Jack 300 in the nude ooh not for me I'll have a burger. Love it jack as always xx

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison Date: 11/16/2012 7:41:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Each to his or her own taste, dear Mandy! LOL Big huggeroonies, Jackles xox
  1. Date: 11/16/2012 6:49:00 AM

    Thanks for the facts and laughs. Have a great day Jack.

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison Date: 11/16/2012 6:57:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    That should be it! Think I need to let this concept die a peaceful death! LOL
  1. Date: 11/16/2012 5:45:00 AM

    facts with a touch of laughter,amazing,great write Jack,enjoyed

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison Date: 11/16/2012 5:47:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Fun stuff eh but I think I've beat the concept to death! LOL Last one... thanks for dropping by my friend!