Aye t’was a beautiful breeze come a wafting through the trees,
The bonnie belles carpeted under the green ivy all a climb,
When along came me lassie, me favourite squeeze,
And to be sure now I’ll have a time of it makin’ this rhyme.
But I’ll not let that stop me, I’ll jest have me a nip,
As I describe me fair dream and the swing of her hip,
the coarse hair fairly bristling o’er her upper lip,
And her dirty knickers hangin’ below her slip.
Ah such a fair one me heart did skip; to her me mug I’ll tip!
Couldn’t keep me hands off her as her nose begun to drip,
She had dried dinner on her cheek; oh how she did sneeze!
Whilst in girly fashion wiped her nose on her sleeve.
Kin ya blame me barkeep? Can ya try an perceive?
Why I woke in the night and started to heave?