Bureaucrat's wonderland, admin sensational!
Dealing with legions of forms immigrational
Fill 'em out, print 'em out, copy each copy
Certify, verify, check it's not sloppy
Ensure that your mug-shots' dimensions abide
By strict regulations, for proof bona fide
Designed to deter and deny the defrauder
Tho' he is from England, not South of the border
Questions for terrorists, questions for spies
Questions for arms dealers (unsavoury guys):
“Do you like bombs and explosive devices?
Do you sell drugs at unbeatable prices?
Are you a Communist, socialist slut?
Do you intend hiding crack up your butt?
Your shotgun's permitted (so long as you've brought her
For wasting wild bison and Indian slaughter)
Hoping to join the best nation on earth?
Show me your balls and certificate of birth
(Not just the awesomest, also the wealthiest
And if you have money, we're even the healthiest)”
Fingerprints, medicals, primary screening
Interviews, vaccines and queries (well-meaning)
“Tho' thousands of dollars you've paid for this pleasure
Now enter and exit our country at leisure”