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Dreaming of a Jackpot

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Below is the poem entitled Dreaming of a Jackpot which was written by poet Kyle kriticos. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Dreaming of a Jackpot

The cards are on the table
I cannot walk away
Fortune's tide will come by morning
The winds of luck will blow by morning

Don't call, don't even bother
Cause all I wanna do is play
And fortunes tide, it comes by morning
But the house will win the day

The gamblers twitch is in my sleeve
Because I'm hiding secret luck
And the wheel's spinning wildly
The dice go flailing wildly

I'm a man of many hobbies
But the carosel is stuck
And the dice just keep on spinning
But they never spin enough 

And the jackpot in the morning
It takes the house upstream 
I chase it! Boldly swimming! 
But I'm drowning for a dream

Kyle Kriticos

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  1. Date: 9/24/2011 1:54:00 PM
    Hey kyle beautiful poem here.Enjoyed.But the form is not ENCLOSED RHYME as you have selected.Pl check.....regards

  1. Date: 7/18/2011 5:52:00 PM
    I have a son with the same dream, Loved the whole verse. Well done.

  1. Date: 7/16/2011 8:48:00 PM
    dreams come true Kyle .. excellent piece as we all want a jackpot in our lives luv.. keep chasing it ..excellent ..luv.

  1. Date: 7/16/2011 6:17:00 PM
    Nice expressions with nice rhyming, Kyle

  1. Date: 7/16/2011 3:35:00 PM
    Kyle thank you so much, your comment moved me and happy you enjoyed x