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GIRL AT CHAMP DE MARS

Vee Bdosa Avatar Vee Bdosa - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled GIRL AT CHAMP DE MARS which was written by poet Vee Bdosa. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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GIRL AT CHAMP DE MARS

     GIRL AT CHAMP DE MARS
Beneath the girds of steel, rising to the sky;
where tourists go to watch the world go by;
the children come to play, and lovers walk
through myriads of life and idle talk,

this is the Champ de Mars where Paris goes
to show that side of life that only Paris knows,
with donkey rides and jugglers all for fun
where you'll forget a love, or meet someone.

A troubadour will sing her memory
so you'll forget tomorrow has to be,
and people watching is the thing in style,
each painted face, each heartbreak, every smile.

Where madamoiselle forgets what she must wear
throws caution to the wind, lets down her hair,
an orange blouse, and skin tight yellow hose,
she shows the world someone it never knows.

She's looking for that locking of her eyes
and touching of her heart, as the time flies,
and someone she has known, but never met,
the first kiss of her life she'll not forget.

And Paris knows, yes Paris knows what's real
the love she comes to know and love and feel
it never will leave her, as time goes by
and she will think on it, many times, and cry.

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  1. Date: 5/23/2011 7:29:00 AM

    Good flow. I would however suggest changing "as time it flies "to something more natural sounding like "as the time flies." To me it was the only snag in an otherwise perfect picture of Paris. I still give it a seven.

  1. Date: 5/23/2011 7:05:00 AM

    Ooh La Lah Parieeeee....thank you