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Boxing day

Patrick Parks Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Boxing day which was written by poet Patrick Parks. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Boxing day

Perhaps you see me
it may be your gift to see
or merit for hard work
or maybe you paid for it with the lashings you endured
but surely it is now your inescapable wretched curse
as the truth haunts you
but you cannot close your eyes
like me.

It is my fault I am as this
to be as false as I am
false is my name
I cannot love that
I have buried it inside
and run away
because it is too ugly
easier to smile and pretend.

My grandmother saw it in my blackened soul
clever and easy to lie
she hurt me
made me ashamed
and broken
to protect the world and even me
but her tricks did not work
because I have killed too many hearts
and poisoned those that survived
even my own.

I am cold
and it is right I have suffered so
because I lost my heart
and replaced it with a ticking clock
that pretends to beat like a happy butterfly
and tries to convince me I have feelings
that I cannot reach
I am a masquerader of abundant hollow emotions
that laugh and smile and cry
but I never face myself
in the dark alone
because there is nothing to see without a light
my flame has no fuel
unless I suck it from another's bloody neck.

I do not know myself
because I cannot bear to look
but I hate myself as much as you hate me
and you should
because every love I'm given
is less for the world
I am a black hole
I give to get
like Hansel and Gretel's keeper
I only give love
to fatten up my lover
and open her precious tender trusting heart
so that I can consume it in eventual flames
and steal all of their future hope
and faith in humanity.

And I don't know how to stop
and am too afraid to stop myself
with the knife I keep hidden
but never have the courage to use
because I am a dark monster
that pretends to be inviting
like a pristine beach
on a boxing day morning
beckoning humanity
to my shoreline
so I can consume them
with my hungry tsunami
and leave them writhing in pain
with all hope in shambles.

Rescuers arrive in love
one after another
I greet them with open arms
as if I am deserving
needy
blinded behind my veil
pretending to myself until it is too late
and just as they almost open my heart
I swallow them under my next crushing wave.

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  1. Date: 1/9/2012 11:46:00 AM
    Congratulations on the week`s win Patrick!! :)oxox love from Anne-Lise

    Parks Avatar Patrick Parks
    Date: 1/9/2012 11:47:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Anne-Lise
  1. Date: 1/9/2012 8:12:00 AM
    Congratulations on your poetry being featured this week Patrick. I wish you the best in 2012 with your writing. Love, Carol

    Parks Avatar Patrick Parks
    Date: 1/9/2012 8:16:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    WOW! I wasn't expecting that! Thank you!
  1. Date: 4/28/2011 10:17:00 AM
    Enjoyed reading your excellent poetry again today Patrick. I will be back again to read more. Please continue to write and share your poetry with us. The best to you in your writing endeavors whatever they may be. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 4/27/2011 10:49:00 AM
    Just stopping by today to thank you for all your kinds comments Patrick. Hopefully they will get the site back up and running correctly for everyone soon. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 4/26/2011 11:52:00 AM
    I love these dark poems...welcome to PS...Jimmy

  1. Date: 4/25/2011 10:58:00 AM
    Gwendolen: I'm not really an "athlete". My "turnover rate" has been on the order of years between catastrophes. Unfortunately, that is, I fear, all the worse, painful, and damaging.

  1. Date: 4/25/2011 8:29:00 AM
    That is a beautiful, deep, and dark poem. Then again aren't all of us on some level a sucking fiend? Hope you find a love to endure the monstrosity that we call "life".

  1. Date: 4/24/2011 3:03:00 PM
    This is gripping...the soulful thots of an athlete hidden behind the veil of his successes. Welcome to the SOUP! Enjoyed your first posting. Gwendolen

  1. Date: 4/24/2011 6:51:00 AM
    Wow! I'm the kind of gal who loves picking fights with myself.... its a wager I'll never win... I sure enjoyed your poem... have a happy Easter..p.d