They say that a pet resembles its master,
but I don't believe that it's true.
When I walk with my dog,
he always walks faster.
When I eat a sandwich,
my dog eats a shoe.
My dog often scratches his head with his feet,
but, I use my hands, instead.
I tend to roll in bed when I sleep.
My dog rolls in anything dead.
I've never pooped in a clearing, or park;
I've never chewed on a bone;
When a squirrel climbs a tree, I don't stare up and bark -
I'd rather just leave it alone.
But I don't get fed, and watered, and rubbed,
and I don't get treats when I pee.
And I'm not, as quickly, forgiven and loved,
when someone gets angry with me.
They say that a pet is just like its master,
but I haven't seen any proof yet.
Personally, I think that would be a disaster.
Instead, I wish I was more like my pet.