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Fireworks

cherry bombs convulse
their fuse burns painfully fast
lesson learned, no thumb

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  1. SweetHeart Avatar
    Linda-Marie SweetHeart
    Date: 7/11/2010 7:45:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    SOUP MAIL.. IMPORTANT .. URGENT ...
  1. Brown Avatar
    Carol Sunshine Brown
    Date: 7/6/2010 8:30:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Congratulations Mac on your win in Deborah Guzzi's contest "Fireworks". Love, Carol
  1. P.iNk Avatar
    binibining P.iNk
    Date: 7/6/2010 1:56:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    ouchy!!! lesson learned indeed, Mac! congrats on your win with this one--glad you didn't withdraw it , and yes I definitely learned from Deborah's tips-a ton of thanks to her ^_^ --nikko :)
  1. Dietrich Avatar
    Andrea Dietrich
    Date: 7/5/2010 1:41:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Congratulations, Mac. A warning one!!
  1. George Avatar
    Elaine George
    Date: 7/5/2010 9:34:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Good one!!!!! Congratulations on yourwin in deborah' contest, Mac. Lainie
  1. SweetHeart Avatar
    Linda-Marie SweetHeart
    Date: 7/4/2010 6:41:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Congrats Mac on your HM for your Haiku in the Fireworks contest with this remarkable write ..enjoy your honor as u celebrate on the 4th in style.. with luv from the "Sweetheart" in Hawaii..on vacation still.. AlohA.. my friend...
  1. Guzzi Avatar
    Debbie Guzzi
    Date: 7/3/2010 4:38:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Please do not remove it Mac...it is among the best..do not forget your ... after line 2 it indicates the "cut" -- is used also! Haiku do not have titles though. On this site you just put your line one in the title space
  1. McGovern Avatar
    Mac McGovern
    Date: 7/2/2010 11:45:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Because I have made changes to this poem after submission and accepted Deborah's advise, I have asked Deborah to withdraw this poem from the contest. It is more important to me to accept worthy advise and withdraw from the contest than leave the poem unrevised. Good luck and best wishes to the rest of you poetic warriors. May you all benefit, as I, through your participation in this explosive Fireworks Contest.

  1. Guzzi Avatar
    Debbie Guzzi
    Date: 7/2/2010 5:55:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Hi Mac I don't care about the 5/7/5 as long as it's not more than 17...I think it would be a stronger senryu without "blow up" line 1..keep the action in line 2 & 3...also no need for extremely in my mind...tweak, or not as you please..most important title is line 1 ...cherry bombs ( small c)
  1. Brown Avatar
    Earle Brown
    Date: 7/2/2010 6:03:00 AM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    You makes me laugh. Good luck
  1. A Avatar
    Poet Destroyer A
    Date: 7/1/2010 7:36:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    lol how funny,, lesson learned he he,, enjoyed this one..P.D.
  1. Mehta Avatar
    Dr.Ram Mehta
    Date: 7/1/2010 6:34:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    A nicely worded picture of the fireworks
  1. Gelb Avatar
    Michael Gelb
    Date: 7/1/2010 6:32:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Some of us have been down that road
  1. Kendrick Avatar
    Sara Kendrick
    Date: 7/1/2010 4:42:00 PM
    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Got a chuckle..Some of us older ones had some bad experiences with these fireworks..Good luck in the contest..Sara


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