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Fireworks

Mac McGovern Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Fireworks which was written by poet Mac McGovern. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Fireworks

cherry bombs convulse
their fuse burns painfully fast
lesson learned, no thumb

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  1. Date: 7/11/2010 7:45:00 AM
    SOUP MAIL.. IMPORTANT .. URGENT ...

  1. Date: 7/6/2010 8:30:00 AM
    Congratulations Mac on your win in Deborah Guzzi's contest "Fireworks". Love, Carol

  1. Date: 7/6/2010 1:56:00 AM
    ouchy!!! lesson learned indeed, Mac! congrats on your win with this one--glad you didn't withdraw it , and yes I definitely learned from Deborah's tips-a ton of thanks to her ^_^ --nikko :)

  1. Date: 7/5/2010 1:41:00 PM
    Congratulations, Mac. A warning one!!

  1. Date: 7/5/2010 9:34:00 AM
    Good one!!!!! Congratulations on yourwin in deborah' contest, Mac. Lainie

  1. Date: 7/4/2010 6:41:00 PM
    Congrats Mac on your HM for your Haiku in the Fireworks contest with this remarkable write ..enjoy your honor as u celebrate on the 4th in style.. with luv from the "Sweetheart" in Hawaii..on vacation still.. AlohA.. my friend...

  1. Date: 7/3/2010 4:38:00 AM
    Please do not remove it Mac...it is among the best..do not forget your ... after line 2 it indicates the "cut" -- is used also! Haiku do not have titles though. On this site you just put your line one in the title space

  1. Date: 7/2/2010 11:45:00 PM
    Because I have made changes to this poem after submission and accepted Deborah's advise, I have asked Deborah to withdraw this poem from the contest. It is more important to me to accept worthy advise and withdraw from the contest than leave the poem unrevised. Good luck and best wishes to the rest of you poetic warriors. May you all benefit, as I, through your participation in this explosive Fireworks Contest.

  1. Date: 7/2/2010 5:55:00 PM
    Hi Mac I don't care about the 5/7/5 as long as it's not more than 17...I think it would be a stronger senryu without "blow up" line 1..keep the action in line 2 & 3...also no need for extremely in my mind...tweak, or not as you please..most important title is line 1 ...cherry bombs ( small c)

  1. Date: 7/2/2010 6:03:00 AM
    You makes me laugh. Good luck

  1. Date: 7/1/2010 7:36:00 PM
    lol how funny,, lesson learned he he,, enjoyed this one..P.D.

  1. Date: 7/1/2010 6:34:00 PM
    A nicely worded picture of the fireworks

  1. Date: 7/1/2010 6:32:00 PM
    Some of us have been down that road

  1. Date: 7/1/2010 4:42:00 PM
    Got a chuckle..Some of us older ones had some bad experiences with these fireworks..Good luck in the contest..Sara