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Self Deprecation

Why is it so easy for me 
to see the ''good'' in everyone else
ANYONE else.......
but me? 

It was brought to my attention
that I quite frequently
self deprecate.

My first response to this was
''Oh my gosh! I am so...stupid! ''
But, then I thought
about my kids.

What am I teaching them
when I put myself down
as I so often do? 

Why can't I just accept a compliment? 
Instead of saying ''Thank you''
I always try to convince the person
why they should reconsider.

I hear myself.
I tell myself to ''Just shut up! ''
But, I still manage to sound like a fool
listing my many flaws
(just in case they hadn't noticed them) .

I have to stop this.
I need to find a way 
to accept praise
and love myself. 


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