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who's moonin' who?

i joined a nudist colony,
what a big mistake!
everybody's chillin' in the buff,
sippin' soda by the lake

a big ol' gal named Marsha,
stepped on a banana peel;
our feet got tangled together,
as we tumbled down a hill!

my life flashed before me,
rolls of flesh filled my space;
by the time we hit rock bottom,
a giant moon was in my face!

i fought so hard for freedom,
her butt was crushin' my skull;
i began to lose consciousness,
as my vision was gettin' dull!

mounds of sweat overwhelmed me,
six others came to assist,
beneath that skin i was tastin',
the biggest butt i ever kissed!

with a "heave!" and a "ho!" i was free,
my body was a mangled mess;
i spent a week in the hospital,
an ugly sight, i must confess!

i must've been really stupid,
stupidity you can't take back;
i'll never forget that summer,
i got high on the largest piece of crack!

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  1. Date: 1/20/2010 10:22:00 PM

    This is definitely one of my favs. as of now!! Hilariously funny, Milton! Great job! Thanks for commenting on my poem! Peace, Audrey

  1. Date: 1/20/2010 12:04:00 PM

    Well that'll teach you to be more careful, Milton. What a hoot this poem is! You allowed the reader to laugh out loud as you tumbled to the bottom of the hill -- a new take on Jack and Big Mamma Jill. Thanks for sharing this entertaining write! Love, Carolyn

  1. Date: 1/17/2010 6:34:00 AM

    That is so funny, Milton, I can't even stand it. My mind is presenting all sorts of slow mo pictures to me from this write! That just ain't right!! heehee- Robert

  1. Date: 1/17/2010 1:17:00 AM

    Darnit Milton, I almost urinated on myself reading this one. LOL. you're a funny man. David

  1. Date: 1/16/2010 10:49:00 PM

    You crack me up! pardon the Punn. Can't stop lauging. Thanks for making my day, Milton. lainie