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Comforting absence of feeling

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Below is the poem entitled Comforting absence of feeling which was written by poet Julian Joseph. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Comforting absence of feeling

I admit,
Emotions were enlightened with your essence
But don't think i enjoy this edification for a second

Delightful numbing was my closest friend
long before you meandered in,
imitating innocence 
and self righteous regard
 
Oh Beautiful solitude
my first confidant, my first lover.
I still think about it when I’m with you
we got along better than you and I ever will

I, mean come on!
It was the last thing I had
I owned my self-destruction
Now it belongs to you

Because you fill me with
Consistent apologies
I ask forgiveness for my excitement, and pardon me for my smiles
And I’m sorry that I don’t know what your plan for me is
Self-doubt or self-awareness?

It’s Funny
you say you hate my narcissism
Yet engage me to ignore my instinctive personal hatred

Which had been held tightly 
Until you chiseled out a hole in my soul
Big enough to stick your flashlight in to explore
And syrupy useless feelings poured out
ruining my sunday clothes…

So now my emotions use their unfamiliar powers 
To make my eyes release the last liquid in my body
Into your hands
So you can lick up all of this salty anguish
And smirk with my pride stuck in your teeth

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  1. Date: 6/3/2010 11:26:00 AM
    Congratulations on your poetry making it through the first round Julian. I wish you the best in the finals. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 5/31/2010 3:06:00 PM
    Congratulations on making it through the first round of the Poetry Soup contest with this poem. Best wishes in the finals. Karen

  1. Date: 5/3/2010 9:37:00 AM
    Many congrats on your featured piece. Rgds Janette

  1. Date: 5/3/2010 4:32:00 AM
    Congratulations on your poetry being featured this week at PoetrySoup. May you have many more features Julian. Love,Carol

  1. Date: 4/28/2010 7:34:00 PM
    Wow! I thought you were describing my ex! It amazes me that some people treat us so terribly. The fourth stanza was the one that really got me. Why do we have to explain our enthusiasm or hide our smiles? Why can we not be accepted for who we are. And the last line said it all. They devour our very souls and happiness. Really great poem.

  1. Date: 1/14/2010 3:52:00 AM
    I would like to welcome you to PoetrySoup Julian. I also wish you the best in your writing endeavors. If you have questions please feel free to ask anyone here. We are all willing to help and if we don't know the answer we will find someone who does. Love, Carol