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Best Jack Ellison Poems

Below are the all-time best Jack Ellison poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

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Rules For Living

Respect for nature Respect for authority Respect for fellow man The rules of majority Honesty is contentment Honesty in everything Honesty of the heart Alive as the spring Joyful in common things Joyful of mind Joyful just being Gentle and kind Happy within your soul Happy with friends Happy to be living At peace to the end Creeds I adhere to Creed for giving Creed for success Great rules for living © Jack Ellison 2014

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Love In The Trenches

Now this is my definition of love It's much like wrestling in the mud You get down and dirty And say things quite flirty Then it all comes together with a thud You scream out bloody murder together Promise your undying love forever Roll over and whisper The name of her sister Then you realize that wasn't too clever She pummels your head without any mercy You attempt to defend 'gainst her fury You start to see rainbows And a bunch of pretty halos A ferocious little dynamo this girlie Well eventually you recover your senses And are able to put up some defences You plant a big smacker On this sweet li'l attacker Then it's back to love in the trenches © Jack Ellison 2015

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Enjoy The Ride

Some days are diamonds, some are stone To quote an old John Denver hit Truer words were never spoken The “stone days” (not stoned days!) Are only sent to us to test our resolve And to appreciate the “diamond days” even more To prove, that as dark or as difficult as life can get There is ALWAYS a silver lining Otherwise we'd all be candidates for the looney bin Trust me, have I ever lied to you before? Okay... well only a couple of times And I was under the influence??? The influence of WHAT, you may ask Uh, I take the fifth... okay here are some examples Now let me see, watching a pretty girl go by Or the government sending me an unexpected refund Of a couple of hundred dollars YEEHAW Maybe sitting down to my favourite meal With my lovely spouse I've adored Since the two of us were dreamy-eyed sweethearts In grade school right up to the present And now happily married with a couple of wee ones Don't get me wrong, I do have days of stone But my diamond days far outnumber them So the bottom line is Live, love, laugh and be happy You only get one chance to travel life's highway So ENJOY the ride!!! © Jack Ellison 2014

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Life's Little Secret

I never really realized How crucial friends can be I used to think that one or two Would be enough for me But now I think I'm changing How I view this need to share The good things and the heartaches With ones who really care We moved here from the city With a group of folks like us To wile away our golden years To relax and avoid the fuss Since moving to this paradise I'm now a different man I welcome conversations Bout neighbours and their plans To share each other's happiness And cry when losing one We're all so very much alike No matter where we're from It's not a competition To see who wins the prize It's all about companionship To feel the bonds that tie Now if I were just to count them There'd be twenty-five I'm sure Some more close than others But all of them top drawer So if you see me walking tall And whistling a happy tune It's because I've found my paradise No more doom and gloom © Jack Ellison 2014

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Crazy Thoughts No 1

Why do they call it 'tourist season'
If you're not allowed to shoot 'em
Seems like a great opportunity
To end the over crowding problem

If a house fly loses both of its wings
Would we have to call them 'walks'
Is it possible to have a civil war
Of course not that's just silly talk

Any idea what the best thing was
That came before sliced bread
If a turtle somehow loses its shell
Is it homeless, naked, or dead

I find this saying quite unnerving
“Practice” is what doctors do
And braille on drive-through windows
Find that kinda scary don't you

If a parsley farmer ever gets sued
Can they legally garnish his wages
Well that's enough of this silly talk
At times I go through these phases

© Jack Ellison 2012

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Chunky Charlie

A Special Poem for Will Helppi A really fat cat named Chunky Charlie From a town called Licketysplit Corner Was renowned for a very interesting talent As a world famous circus performer His extra poundage added to the spectacle People thought it was really appealing They giggled to see him jiggle while juggling Six tennis balls as he was kneeling A pretty little kitty called Cuddly Cathie Winked at him while watching him juggle So trying to concentrate on his performance He found it to be quite a struggle In fact, near the end of Charlie's performance Balls flew off in every direction One ended up in the lap of Cuddly Cathie He approached her with a very red complexion He stuttered and stammered trying to apologize Her beauty made him literally tongue tied Instead of an apology these words stumbled out "Will you be my pretty kitty cat bride?" Not a moment went by, Cuddle Cathie replied "Yes oh yes, I'll be your blushing bride" Dear Charlie could hardly contain his emotions He was absolutely brimming with pride The moral of this tale is really quite obvious Perseverance pays off sooner or later You should never give up when reaching for a star The rewards will never be greater!

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Whatever, Whatever, Whatever

Whatever turns your crank Whatever tickles your pickle Whatever dunks your donut Whatever waxes your dolphin Whatever buffs your Buddha Whatever pops your cork Whatever pets your monkey Whatever frosts your cookies Whatever spills your pills Whatever trips your trigger Whatever humps your camel Whatever melts your chocolate Whatever peels your onion Whatever chafes your carrot Whatever flops your mop Whatever rocks your socks Whatever teeters your totter Whatever milks your goat Whatever pings your pong Whatever peels your banana Whatever blows your nozzle Whatever tips your canoe Whatever flicks your switch Whatever zips your zipper Whatever blows your stack Whatever... whatever... whatever! © Jack Ellison 2014

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I Cannot Tell A Lie

Men's minds are devious at the best of times Also twisting their stories I should know, I'm one of dem der guys Pretty sure I'm no different than 98% of my fellow males It's inbred into our psyche and of this I'm sure We're really damn proud of it However I'm a straight shooter At the expense of my fellow males, I apologize Hate blowing the whistle on youse guys But I can't help it... as Georgie once said "I cannot tell a lie" Everything and I mean EVERYTHING That comes out of my mouth Is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth So help... Z-Z-Z-A-A-A-A-A-P-! © Jack Ellison 2014

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The Arc Of Life

Travelling through life resembles an arc We start out as a child emerging from the dark To reach a crescendo Establishing a tempo Then sadly we all must eventually disembark © Jack Ellison 2015

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Jan - The Giggle Queen

My sister Jan, y'all know who I mean Joined the Soup and became a giggle machine Big laughs galore Leaves us wanting more Giggle Queen of the Soup, brings joy to the scene © Jack Ellison 2015