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Sad Goodbye Poems | Sad Poems About Goodbye

These Sad Goodbye poems are examples of Sad poems about Goodbye. These are the best examples of Sad Goodbye poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Ballad | |

Signing Off

--Goodbye--To my Addiction-

The time has come to part,
I will leave many with broken hearts
If one day you call on me,
I'm sad to say I will hold my tongue missing each one relentlessly 
I'm not doing this for me; I am doing this for you
I could stay here and win, and not give in 
But, this soup bowl comes with demons and nasty shadows
Demons and nasty shadows, taking and crashing my light
Demons I had to fight off the entire time I was here
Shadows hating the way I welcomed every poet with a happy cheer
Demons and shadows whom drown in their selfish everyday pity.

For those smiling on my departure, 
I want you to have this wonderful gift 
So please copy paste this moment from the bottom of my heart
**I hope this gift brings you laughter, knowing 
I've been sad, these past few days, drying up my final soup tears**

I will miss this part of what makes me ME -my love and lust for poetry.
I agree with many I should never surrender to the envy of demonic dust
Giving up the passion that completed a part of my soul for years
But, the reality of life, is the life's I give and given when I make love happen
In my heart I know it's time to give myself back to reality
SO AT THE END I WIN, I'm the one who ends up with an everlasting smile
I'll finally be free from this place, where most treated me unfair & unkind
Free, from the negativity of the few who hide behind a dishonest disguise?

Wait until you notice your soup bowl's going stale
You will miss me, and I will miss you
But, my enemy will miss me even more
Reminiscing the times we spent hogging up 70% of blogs,
Arguing and fighting over not agreeing with many thoughts.
But, it was never the differences of opinions, it was more like---
Let's slay the Destroyer, a name like that should never be on top
So please know I am sad, and this is not the way I want to go
I'm not leaving you because I want to 
I'm leaving you because, the rumors are 
"The soup is better without the sweetness of the poet destroyer."
The only big thing about me -was my heart not my ego 
I never claimed to be the best; 
You're the one who claimed I am good enough
You took me in and returned my love
In ways others could and would not accept.
And for you my loving poet friends, and fans
I will walk away with my dignity/integrity; 
I can CARELESS IF I PLACE OR DON'T PLACE IN YOUR CONTEST
I guess I'm finally growing up 
In becoming the bigger/better poet.

Signing Off ---Love 
The Poet Destroyer


Details | Marsiya | |

I'm my Daddy Made Over

Dedicated to my Dad Jerry W. Niday 3/20/1952 - 6/18/2013


I am who I am because of him
He’s the reason for my son’s name
He gave me my courage & my strength
To stand tall even when standing wasn’t easy
Stand for the ones who can’t
To think and fend for myself
I’m my Daddy made over

Taught me to fight back 
To never back down
How to pick myself back up
When I’ve been knocked down
Fight for what I believe
I’m my Daddy made over

He gave me my stubbornness 
Gave me my pride
Gave me my temper
Taught me not to take crap
To speak my mind no matter who
Work for what I want
I’m my Daddy made over

How to keep my emotions in check
How to handle large amounts of pain
When in trouble he always had my back
He knew how my mind worked better than anyone
I got it from him
I’m my Daddy made over

Even though he’s gone
I’ll stand and continue on 
I may stumble I may fall 
May even get hurt along the way
But I’ll pick myself back up
I’ll dust myself off and stand tall
I’m honored and proud to say
I’m my Daddy made over


Sabrina Niday Hansel



Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Elegy | |

I Need Your Help Daddy

I’m tired
I’m Physically and Emotionally tired
I don’t want to be the strong one anymore
I can’t this time
I don’t know what to do Daddy
I need your help down here

I can’t get back in control of my emotions 
I’m having a hard time dealing with your absence
I’m having a hard time standing by myself
I need your help Daddy

I’m broken and lost without you Daddy
I need your will to want to carry on
I need your strength to over come this
I need your strength to stay standing
Your courage to fight back again
I need your help 

Please Daddy I’m at a loss
How am I suppose to do this
I need your guidance 
I need you to guide me back
To whom I was before
I need your help Daddy
I need your help







Details | Free verse | |

Moments In Time

The sweetest sounds of burning trees
A gentle stroking in the breeze
The calm has lasted past the storm
Cloudy visions, Satan’s roar
Too many sights have passed my way
A time found only in the haze
The softest screams are running bare
My aching bones creak as I stare

You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark

The battle’s started at the end
No one is coming to repent
The sinners grab their wine from prey
No judgment calling here to stay
The sport is reckless to be told
The one is laughing at his souls
It falters nowhere to be sure
The power grows forevermore
Like a spirit in the wind
I have no say in where you’ve been 
But cross the line to come to me
And pay the price for ecstasy

You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark. 


Details | Free verse | |

Bill


R.I.P. William Dale Eubanks
d. July 1, 2012, aged 68 yrs., Tennessee Ridge, Tennessee

Death came as no surprise
the first Sunday in July;
it claimed you, on a ridge in Tennessee,
with kin who took you in and waited with you
through the last hard days.
You kept what fears you had well hid,
did not betray with loud complaint
the fate you could not but know awaited.
A smile, a joke, a hug – exotic meals –
And genuine interest greeted all you met.
And you were, certainly, never boring
but well-traveled and smart
beyond the telling.
We’ll miss your wit, your bright demeanor,
and will remember all you freely gave ---
and what you took from us
with your passing.


Details | Rhyme | |

Suicide

I see the pain in your eyes
The fear in your voice
I know because I've been in your place
It's not your choice

I'm sorry
I would hate for anyone  to feel this way
Please don't leave this world
Just try and stay

This isn't the only way to go
At least don't leave without a fight
Just know
You were never alone

You had me right by your side
Even when you never wanted me around
I promise to you I never told a lie
I was always honest and true
Towards you

You don't have to end your life
I've tried to many times its not worth it
Please put down that knife
I mean it

Stay with me
Fight this battle with me by your side
You always had me don't you see
I was always nice to you

Even when you where terrible to me
I fought threw it and you can too
You're just a little seed
Waiting to grow into something beautiful


Details | ABC | |

GoodBye

                               GOODBYE

I miss the way you hugged me when I cried and how you told me how you loved me 
every night but now you won't even look at me and you don't even talk to me 
anymore and when I'm upset you just laugh and walk away........... All I want to 
know is what did I do that was so bad that you treat me like a punching bag........ I 
miss the way you kissed me but I guess you've moved on and I try boy do I try but 
your all I dream about all I think about is you, you were my world and now your 
gone I'm so lost without you I cry every night because someone will say your 
name....... What I miss most of all is that I could tell you anything but now you won't 
even listen.............. What kills me is you saying goodbye for good goodbye god 
those words kill me every time good bye good bye good bye....


Details | Rhyme | |

Elixir of My Soul

Did you know I loved you before we met?
Drowning within your beautiful eyes,
Do you now feel the painful regret?

Did you vow to love me, and just only me?
Draped within a veil of pure bliss,
Diving below the depths of impurity.

Did you softly whisper, that I was the one?
Drinking the elixir of my innocence,
Downing till there was all but none.

Did you believe we would be here forever?
Distance keeping us miles apart,
Doubting we see each other ever.

Did you think of me lately, and miss me?
Dreaming of the two of us together,
Doused with love in an emotional sea.

Did you always wish misery, forever?
Darkness as your guardian in life,
Dragging us to hell, on this evil endeavor.

Did you wish I meant more, and ask why?
Dusting yourself entirely free of us,
Desolation forever, as you wave goodbye.

For the last time……….


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

SO blind

   All this time I have always had my doubts,
Not the person led to believe is what I found out.
   To be deceived and lied to for oh so long,
Down deep I knew there was something wrong.
   Head over heels I had fallen in love ,
Always thought you were sent from above.
   How the knife is twisted into my side ,
So much pain I can do nothing but cry.
   These memories of what I thought was real,
I'm confused and I don't how how to feel.
    Is this really possible that I did not know,
Through all this time it never showed.
    Such an evil thing to do to a man ,
Especially the lies which he could not stand.
    How cruel and cold your heart must be ,
To carry on as you did never letting me see.
     Hard to accept all those moments  so dear ,
Realizing they are now my greatest fears .
     What was to be Joy and Happiness,
Replaced by the feelings of a loneliness.
   Never did I imagine this happening to me ,
Thinking that you and I were meant to be .
   It's a very hard thing for a man to accept ,
When he finds out that he's been tricked.
    Was it the money or the control you had ,
Maybe because you are really just that bad.
    Some day soon for this you will have to pay ,
For the sins against me and your evil ways.
    Goodbye to you  who ever you are ,
For in this heart you have left brutally scarred.
Tac.


Details | Epic | |

We Lost More Than a Dad

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost half of how we came to be
We lost we four girls first love
We lost our Best Friend

We lost more than just a Dad that day
Our Mom lost her Soul Mate, Her other half 
Our children lost their Papaw
We lost our family’s foundation 
We lost the glue that held us together

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost the Strongest man we ever knew 
We lost the man we looked up too
We lost we four girls Teacher of many things

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We four girls lost our Hero
We lost some of our Light
We lost part of our Heart
We lost part of our Soul

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost some of our Courage
We lost some of our Strength
We lost some of our will to fight back
We lost some of our will to carry on
We four girls lost more than a Dad
We lost more than just a Dad that day


Details | Rhyme | |

Let Him Go

This poem I wrote. I call it " Let Him Go "

Sweetheart don't cry
Don't let him make you feel like your nothing
You do have family even though we are not close by
I know your heart is crushing
Don't harp on the past
Don't let him play with your head
You need to get over him fast
His feelings for you are dead
Over 2 years and you still don't have a ring
Your not the one he calls his wifey to be no more
Take a seat and listen up girl here is the thing
He's playing with your feelings and using you like a two dollar whore
I know you were smart once and can be again
He has you so brain washed it's not funny
I know hearing all this is a strain
Think of the example your setting for you little ones honey
Hold your head high and walk away from that loser mama's boy 
Show him that your the one that is too good for his sorry ass
Hell he's such a mama's boy you can find better pleasure in a toy
Your related to me so come on show your sass 
Let go of the past and look to a new future
Let go of the pain and the control freak
Say bye bye Looser
It will get easier one step at a time week by week......


Details | Senryu | |

Playground

Kids go down
The slide…they head toward the swings
TIME TO SCREAM!

Free time ends
Their parents want to go home
Frowns exchange 


Details | Munaajaat | |

Tell Me

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know

Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know

Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that

You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know

You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand

You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel

How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door

You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't 
Answer me, you owe me that much



Sabrina Niday Hansel
~Niday40873~

(motif) Spiritual


Details | Lyric | |

Don't Cry

Please don't cry over my casket 
For I am not there 
Please don't cry at my grave 
My soul has been set free 
I know it's hard not to cry 
I've been down that road one to many times 

I have no more pain 
I have no more sickness 
And I would not change a thing 
As I walk threw the gates of Heaven 
Mom Dad our brothers and sisters 
Will welcome me with open arms 
Here I am free of that pain 

Don't blame yourself 
It was my time to go home 
This is where I'm supposed to be 
Don't dwell on things which you can not change 
I will always be in your heart 

I will always be watching over you 
When that day comes for you to come home
I will be there to welcome you 
With open arms
And walk you threw the gates of Heaven 
You will be greeted by our family & friends
Who came home before you 
Until that day I will be watching over you


Details | Ode | |

Love is a Sacrifice

You have my soul, but you have your fate Whatever your words, I’m willing to take You have my word; I’ll give you my breath It’s like a chain that would never be break You are my love with all my heart, I’ll fight for you with all my might. And in the way, you admire your goals, You hold my hands, but not so close. As you go to your chosen path, I’ll accept the fact that we will be apart. In the dark side, I leave behind Within my faith, that you’ll arise Please don’t look back, coz I’m fighting still I’m hurting so much! Don’t want to have you near I accept my fate for what it does, I’m bleeding so much, do you know for whom it was? You reach your goals, as you want to have, Would you remind the man that gave what he had? As you reach the stars, and be the one Be a sun that shines its own. After the rain, the rainbow comes, Like dark in the moon, when the light flash A glimpse from you at least a short For then I knew my pain is worth.


Details | Free verse | |

Grandma

There's not much to say.
I knew her, know some things,
but certainly not all.

I know how little she put up with fools,
how her cooking surpassed so many others',
how simultaneously sweet and hard she could be.
I know about her smoking,
about her jewelry, her faith,
all these I'll hold close to me.

Every single spark, every star,
shines with such a glow, such a marvelous radiance,
that we can't gaze too closely at it,
lest we cause ourselves pain.
And yet, despite ourselves, again and again,
we do;
because it's not within us to resist
the sheer beauty of it all,
of stories and of life.

A bouquet of tulips for you.
We all miss you already, Grandma.
I miss you.
I know Heaven's got you, taking no guff as always,
making sure we're all doing alright.
I love you.
Andrew James (McGillicutty) Sprouse


Details | Epitaph | |

Know I'm Always There

I didn’t choose to leave you 
For here I don’t belong
But Heaven is my home now
So please my love be strong

I know you cannot hear me
So I'm sending you this prayer
I need for you close your eyes
And feel that I'm still there

When no one’s there to hold you up
You don’t know what to do
When your legs will walk no more
I will carry you

When you stumble down and fall 
Take my hand and rise
For when you cannot find your way
I will be your eyes

Know that when you’re crying
I will wipe away your tears
When dreams are there to haunt you
I will fight away your fears

When loneliness surrounds you
And covers you with fear
Know I’m standing by your side
Know I'm always here

When you feel you can’t go on
When pain is just too real
Know I’ll never leave
Until your scars begin to heal

When dark descends upon you
And sleep no longer comes
I will lie beside you
Till you see the rising sun

I know you’ll keep me in your heart
Even though I'm gone
For time cannot erase our love
In you, it will live on...


Details | Sonnet | |

Many goodbyes

So many ways to say goodbye hwyl fawr is what you say
when  your leaving  here in Wales and trying not to cry
Farvel you say in Denmark used extensibly each day
Hating the final words which they themselves imply..

Now the italians say it with  feeling shouting Addio
with  such aplomb, not like the subtle way of the  czech
they say the word  Sobhem . Whilst In turkey gule gule
is goodbye said with kissing cheek and hugging neck

No matter how we say it goodbye's a final thought
whether its just for 5 minutes  or a lifetime walk
the begging eyes of those we leave behind are caught
saying be back soon so we can walk and talk.

Goodbye to love, goodbye to hurt, goodbye
to life, goodbye to strife, goodbye to goodbyes

Au revoir


Details | Couplet | |

Goodbye Granddad

Gravity pulls my tears into pools.
Im sinking in sorrow -emotional fuels. 

Just turn back the time, I just want a moment. 
To say goodbye once, to cherish and own it. 

I loved my granddad - a man more than great.
Paired with my Granny as the perfect mate. 

A montage of memories that rush my soul.
My eyes fill with tears, I'm losing control. 

Just keep it together, it's what he would want. 
They all say the same, but I stand in front. 

Happiness swells, yet sadness prevails.
Like Christ on the cross, with hands full of nails. 

Life has a reason, and death isn't treason.
-It's moving on up.. A lifetime's a season. 

I look to the sky and say my goodbye.
The time won't turn back, I gave it a try. 

I close my eyes and imagine this-
Paradise in a place full of bliss. 

World peace in a piece of the world.
Without loss and bombs never hurled. 

Snow that falls that doesn't freeze.
Sun that shines that doesn't cease. 

A land where "The forever" is real.
A scene where the sick always heal.

Life with infinite love, like gusts in the wind.
Two little doves, with eternities to spend. 

God has a plan, fool-proof to the core. 
Now Granddad's with him, a reward of much more. 

-Yours Truly


Details | Rhyme | |

Eyes of Seminary

Eyes of Seminary – Zamreen Zarook

Every day in our lives has different fragrance,
God give us various things in abundance,
Day by day knowledge is gained in accordance,
Things depend according to the attendance.

Two years of studies,
Helped us to come out with various abilities,
Extremely joyful moments with buddies,
But life said every aspect has its boundaries.

Teachers become very friendly,
They approach us very kindly,
They speak on us exaggeratedly,
Because they know, if not we might behave badly.

Big shots in the school boundary,
These are years of foundry,
It helped us to find and go for laundry,
Marvelous days, fully packed with sundry.


Various angles the kith and kins are civilized,
It’s because our knowledge is enhanced,
Guys and girls turned well experienced,
That’s why we call it levels of advanced.


Details | Lyric | |

Forever Changed

June 18, 2013 our world was Forever Changed
We where over halfway home
When we got the call from our baby sister

Said we need to get back home
We need to come as fast as we can drive
Mom really needs us
Something’s wrong with Daddy
The whole way we drove 80
Hoping & Praying we’d make it in time

Our Family & Friends were weeping 
By the time we got to his side
We knew our Daddy had been taking
And our hearts they were breaking
We never got to say Goodbye
We each softly kissed that man
We four sisters climbed in his bed 
We laid down beside him 
And cried just like babies
For our world was Forever Changed 
 
 


Details | Ballad | |

the last good-bye

Disregard September’s lasting day, its simplicity long foretold, 
As the sound of summer has past us by, into the crisp and radiant fall;
Come hold this mirror to a ray of light, and pass the moment on,     
When in the hint of a calming breeze, is held the lost good-bye

Forever leaves of a brighter shade have fallen from there boughs,
While overhead October waits to softly steal by; 
For opportunities are gone to soon, and change as mornings past 
Like the worth of days, trapped in that sweet good-bye 

Man senses November and its desolate hours in a fog of its own regret,
When the sun could not cool the night, nor the moon give warmth to day;
We are caught in the measure of simple words, tied to hope and wonder
That speaks of a last good-bye

Wrapped tight in the cold of December, bound to the rhythm of life,
Gone to solitudes isolation and the sadness of that forgotten farewell,
Sacrificed to the wind that winter holds, bound to a memory past
Intent to hear of our last good-bye


Details | Light Poetry | |

When I grow old

I will grow old
I tremble in the cold
None to care
I have nothing to fear...

But my love is alive
Though I strive
Beautiful roses to pluck
Yet I am stuck..

I grow old with wrinkle
Yet I will kinker
You will always remain in my mind
This is how you will find...


Details | I do not know? | |

The Women



The Women



(for the countless women, names unknown, who bore the brunt of Apartheid, and who fought the racist system at great cost to themselves and their families, and for my mother, Zubeida Moolla)



Pregnant, your husband on the run,
your daughter, a child, a few years old,

they hauled you in, these brutish men,
into the bowels of Apartheid's racist hell.



They wanted information, you gave them nothing,
these savage men, who skin happened to be lighter,

and white was right in South Africa back then,

but, you did not cower, you stood resolute,

you, my mother, faced them down, their power,
their 'racial superiority', their taunts, their threats.



You, my mother, would not, could not break,

You stood firm, you stood tall.

You, like the countless mothers did not break, did not fall.



You told me many things, of the pains, the struggles,

the scraping for scraps, the desolation of separation
from your beloved Tasneem and your beloved Azad,

my elder sister and brother, whom I could not grow
up with, your beloved children separated by time, by place,

by monstrous Apartheid, by brutish men,
whose skin just happened to be lighter.



You told me many things, as I grew older,
of the years in exile, of the winters that grew ever colder.

You were a fighter, for a just cause,
like countless other South African women,

you sacrificed much, you suffered the pangs,
of memories that cut into your bone, your marrow,

you resisted a system, an ideology, brutal and callous and narrow.



Yes, you lived to see freedom arrive, yet you suffered still,
a family torn apart, and struggling to rebuild a life,

all the while, nursing a void, that nothing could ever fill.



I salute you, mother, as I salute the nameless mothers,

the countless sisters, daughters, women of this land,
who fought, sacrificing it all for taking a moral stand.



I salute you, my mother, and though you have passed,
your body interred in your beloved South African soil,

you shall remain, within me, an ever-present reminder,

of the cost of freedom, the struggles, the hunger, the toil.


I salute you!



(for the brave women of South Africa, of all colours,
who fought against racial discrimination and Apartheid)






Details | Romanticism | |

Can you feel me

Feel me standing there
on the draw bridge
that stands stubburn and erect
over the rushing waters blown by the wind
back and forth.
I listened to the crows
posted on gargoils designed
of eightenth century Gothic architecture
singing their death songs,
when the sun is setting in the far.

The voices of women passing
startle me with a feeling of sorrow
I can't breathe, I am dying.
Feel me, can you feel me rot away?
Slowly but surely rot away
as time passes with ease,
and taxi cabs take smiling, intoxicated faces
to wayward cafes, oh how they screech to a halting stop
and wave to me to get in.

"No thank you, I'd rather walk." I say to the smiling faces
highly intoxicated with the thought of the birds and the bees
rattling around in their empty minds.
Then they drive off, into the city lights and turn a darkened corner.
I look at the rushing water
and feel myself rot away
slowly but surely rot away.

Can you feel me?
Can you hear me?
Can you see me?
Feel my heart thump with slow paces
that manage to keep up with fast melodies.
Of songs that play in your mind
only the ones that make you sigh
and think those one days in Spring time
as you walked over the draw bridge
and paid no mind to the water underneth.
I hear no more talk of you and me, I hear no more talk
of the good old times we all shared.
Time has passed, as I take my last breathe
and hold my chest and shead a tear.
Feel me, can you?
If you can, put your hand to my weak heart 
and feel it thump away with every second wasted
on useless items.
Now, see me a man of one time greatness
reflect his life with a reflection in the water below.
How I sigh and cry and breath heavely,
as I feel myself rot away.

The voices of woman pass me by.
Tomorrow is a new day,
for the smiling faces in taxi cabs will go home
and soak their raging hangovers with cool, wet rags.
As I still stand on the draw bridge singing with the crows,
feeling myself rot away.

Can you feel me without you, rotting away?
I surely can feel myself rot.
Such a heavy word, "rot"
So vulgare, yet a great description of me,
without you.

I pull out a shawl you once wore and I kiss it.
As the wind gusts and the sun rises and my shadow
comes to meet me, the wind shall take my last memory
of you away.
And I shall weep no more.
Then what will I do? Shall I walk the streets
and think of you.
Yes you, still rambling all throughout my head
like a lose screw.
Can you feel me? Feel me rot away
feel me think about you, and all your works.
Can you feel me?


Details | Lyric | |

Rain Song

You played me like a violin
I can't believe I fell again
But clouds revealed the moon, and I was taken
Your eyes were closed
Your words were spare
You ran your fingers through my hair
But from your whispered breath, dark lies were spoken,
  
The moon betrayed me, .......a storm is waking.......
Have you betrayed me?........my world is shaking.......

Those empty words that still resound
pound in my head and I have found
Your love was like a tunnel going nowhere -
I crossed a bridge
And took a risk, 
I fell right in,
But couldn't swim 
The drowning rush surrounds me like a river

I dived right in it........I can't deny it
I would survive it........to cry a river

You came to me without a plan
I should have known that it would end
The echo of the thunder tried to warn me

A distant voice
Inside my head
A cloud appeared with laden air
And pulled me where the heart's a frozen ember

I see the lightning......  I am frightened
I hear the plunder....  a distant thunder

I hear it now, the pouring rain
It beats against the window pane
And now the chill just sends a quiver through me

Storms only come
When I'm alone
Torrential songs are drowning me 
A broken heart can't stop the rain from coming in

When vows were spoken,     a sun was shining.......
But I heard thunder, ....       and you denied it

And truth came pouring down upon my head



_________________________________________________________


Details | Rhyme | |

Dialogue of Souls


Best of friends, for countless years,
we had the best of times.
Now as my eyes are filled with tears,
your soul to Heaven climbs.
The path we take, not always clear,
I feel so lost without you here.
Your last words, prophetic now,
“I’ll be home soon”- you knew somehow.
You left me here, I’m so alone,
but I dreamed Heaven had a phone.
We talked all night, you fell asleep,
I held the line to hear you breathe…  

 

   Copyright © 2013


Details | Lyric | |

First Hello, Last Good Bye

When I first meet you it was hard to say hello
Over the years we had great memories
These memories will be in my heart forever

The day I heard you died it brought tears to my eyes
I did not get a chance to say good bye to you
Now you are gone but not forgotten

You are now in a better place
A place where you can live in peace
I want to see you again someday

This day for me is very sad
I know deep in my heart I have to let you go
It is hard for me to say goodbye


Details | Rhyme | |

Your Special Day

(Dedicated to Danielle Bryant)

It's your special day
And I have so much to say.
Oh that time will let me,
There are thousands of things to make you see:

The happy times,
Lengthening with the clock's chimes;
The beautiful talks we exchanged,
Never believing there could be a change;

The midnight conversations,
Smiles on our faces our only compensation;
Our dreams and hopes,
The only reason we could cope.

Those moments we spent together
Are memories I'll cherish forever;
Memories I can look at and smile,
Knowing they are reasons to aim high.

Oh if I could do more than just words
And not pull memory chords!
It's your special day
And my own very special way
Of wishing a happy birthday
To a friend who just walked away.


Details | Blank verse | |

I miss you

I miss you more than I could ever properly stress... You were a great friend, a true proper friend that anyone would be lucky to have known and luckier still to call their friend. I cherish the many times we shared together in laughter and fun. I think of you often and wish to go back to those simpler days, when things didn't get complicated or even hard. But as I write these words and remember you I wish for only your forgiveness. I let you down and I so very sorry. If I could have been a better person. A better friend then maybe now we'd still be able to share the laughter, the happiness, the pain, and the sadness within our lives. But as it is I abandoned you and lost a truly precious gift. If not for my selfishness perhaps you still might smile in the most dire of times...
with an aching heart 
and heavy head 
I ask for your forgiveness 
as I lay you down to rest
Perhaps if I were better,
If I had been a good true friend
Then you would have felt so alone in the end

My dear Alleria... I miss you every day
With an aching heart I now finally say
Goodbye sweet friend...it has been a year
I must go, and leave you once more.
But this time I leave you in the hands of God
He will care for you and guide you

With as much love as I possess...
Farewell...

I will always, miss you.

---
In Loving memory:
Alleria
June 07, 1993-August 20. 2012


Details | Tanka | |

System Overload

Darkness consumes me
Corrupted thoughts take over
Soul becomes hollow
Self castigation occurs
Tears of blood destroys all hope


Details | Romanticism | |

Good bye

Regrets & mistakes they're memories made..
Our bridge burned up in smoke...
Who would have known how bitter the end would taste...
With what was done...
It over shadows all the good times we shared...
I can't take back...
My heart is heavy...
Wish I could remove the pain...
Please don't forget me, I beg....
I'll find someone like you...
And give her all the things I wanted to give to you...
I wish you all the best....


Details | Epic | |

A New Life

She told, she will
hold my hand
And will be best
forever
But last night, she
turns off a broke
In dreams too, I
heard ‘Over’..!!!

I asked where our
promises are
That we had in past
years
She screamed “I
don’t give damn to
it”
That reflects to my
care..!!!

She thought I can’t
live without her
And in her case it
was true
I tried to get out
of this prison
And from this loving
flu..!!!

It is true, I cried
and last night I
died
But now I left her,
with all the moment
behind
I loved her, but
today it’s not true
I woke up again and
took a lovely
move..!!!

It’s hard to say,
but fact is it is
not lie
See, the winds blows
with my words ‘Good
Bye’..!!!


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Pricked

Your  love pricks me like a rose each thorn grows but no one knows Your so full of 
it as it shows so carry on now go on, go. I'm fed up with the phony and  i'm 
through with the tears, you couldn't pay me all your money to make up for those 
years. Someone help me I feel faint how could I think he was such a saint and 
worst of all I let me fall into a spiral down below. A magic called love carried 
by the dove of someone I use to know.


Details | Rhyme | |

Death by Beauty

A smile moves across her lips
She gazes at her crime
A scar across her flesh and soul
To haunt her for all time
She’ll waste away for all she cares
Never stops to use her brain
Doesn’t care about the ones who are close
All she cares about is pain

She wants to be what the others expect of her
Doesn’t care about the self-respect for her
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Can’t she see what all she has got
Already?

Never to go back again
She feels the world is at an end
She will never show her grief
Although she’ll cry in empty streetS

She’d sooner live like a desolate mole
Living in fear in an empty hole
Screaming silent wails alone
Content to live in her mental home

A final tear falls from her eye
It hits the ground, it’s followed by
A beautiful body, mutated by hate
A kind word could have stopped it, but it is too late
One two many bricks in the wall in her mind
Molding her demise because her heart was blind
This self conscious being could never have won
For she was destroyed by the beautiful ones

She wouldn’t fight back, wouldn’t respect herself
In the end, she managed only to wreck herself
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Little did she know, she had all she had sought
Already


Details | Verse | |

Philosophical Poetry Week: Transient Tuesday

I am a misprint,
Ink blot on love,
I remain a maybe
Longing for fact,
No speck of lint,
A hand in glove.
Thunder; a baby
Will only react

When you etch
Parallel clouds,
Whistling on cue
To a dead town.
Dream a sketch
Of silent crowds
Becoming you,
This boiling crown

Chews thought
Into flagellation.
Holes in the walls
To spy through,
Seeking a sort
Of bricked-up sun.
A heaven of halls,
All leaving you.


Details | Elegy | |

Gypsy

I find it strange coming home 
and not seeing you this evening
I know I shall never see your eyes again
but I shall always feel their gaze
anytime thoughts of you come to my mind
I can still hear your pitiful moan
the first day I kept you in the kennel
Forgive me for not realizing 
that a spirit like yours
was not meant to be caged
After you were set free
how different and alive you looked
jumping around in the yard
with  those precise energetic leaps
So goodbye my little Gypsy
I shall never see you again
but you will always dwell
in that secret spot in my heart
Thank you for the beauty
you brought into my life



November 4, 2013


Details | Concrete | |

Observer

A serpent underneath blue sky,
in shade of man, in twinkle of an eye,
above brick wall, in the structure, at the floor,
venom of white dove; contaminated food, undrinkable water,
misguided youth, pregnant daughter, unfaithful father and hateful son,
mothers do pray while we walk through Babylon;
on teli and in the press, on top shells,
price none the less, in bedroom and at your door..
dawn of a new day seemed to be dark,
after all.


Details | Lyric | |

REALLY WANNA SAY HELLO GOODBYE -Song Lyrics

REALLY WANNA SAY HELLO (Goodbye)

Where did you go, you who just passed me by and left?
Are you doing fine, at a place without me by your side?
Hoping you'll come back, the times I've waited for you
I'll let it go now, I'll forget you now.

The beautiful times we had, they're all memories now
The tears I shed when I missed you like crazy
Hoping you'll come back, time stood still
I'll let you go and leave now, goodbye.

Couldn't you find it, the road that leads back to me? 
Should I wait a little while more, should I wait here a little longer?
Hoping you'll come back, I waited all this while
I'll let it go now, I'll end it for real.

My love for you that I held on so tightly, is slowly dissipating
The me that went crazy missing you, is gradually changing
Hoping you'll come back, time has stood stagnant
I should erase it all now, for real.

My love, it ends right here, this never-ending yearning 
Stuck in my throat, I couldn't say it
Those heartbreaking words of parting
All my beautiful memories of you, it's leaving me right now.

Like falling tears, my love is slowly dissipating
The me that went crazy missing you, is gradually changing
Hoping you'll come back, time stood stagnant
I should erase it now, for real.

Should erase it now?
I should forget you now, goodbye.. :(


Details | Romanticism | |

To Be Apart

Her smile always greets me
As I close my eyes each night
The love in her voice is comforting
With passion, she's burning so bright

A sparkle in her eyes
And a fire in her heart
Let's spend together our lives
Couldn't stand To Be Apart

To Be Apart would destroy me 
Reduce me to the tears
Without her right beside me
All throughout the years

I don't know what I'd do
If I ever had to restart
And oh how much I'd lose
If we were To Be Apart

The most beautiful girl I'd ever seen
With every desirable too
She was everything to me
When we're apart, oh what will I do?


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Tragic Feather

Oh, tragic feather what is thy tragedy
No longer freedom gay or certian loft
How is this thy new translation
From a majesty, unto a wing thou hath mighty dropped

Were thou thus, shunned, cast away 
Or merely, cut out or off
As limb from downward spiral angel
Perhaps, a troubled finch or insanity in wayward hawk

Lie, if thou must, be it amidst a deafening silence, lonesome soft
But, I plead, please tell me fallen feather, what hath befallen thee
Thy tuft to ne’er evermore touch again
What life should be, warmth of the summer's breeze

Sleep, sleep now 'neath the alley's gutter greys 
Catching Weeping Willows damning drops
Adrift as the drowning lily dying
In seas of the myriad scattered rots

An accomplice I shall say, within a winter's willing white
And alas, buried ordinary in this doth the corpse delight
Far beneath the crowds held at bay and forever lost
Now thou hath become the naked grove of wicker and then...
                                   the more of naked souless crops


Details | Lyric | |

What I would Give

          What I would give to see those shining emerald eyes looking at me once more
	                                       To see your young face 	
                                   To see your perfect crooked smile once more

                                 What I would give to have one last hug
                                 To spend just a couple minutes with you
                                    To go back and change the dark past

                                 What I would give to have one more laugh
                                To have one more beautiful memory with you
	
                  What I would give to say goodbye to your pale, magnificent self	


Details | Rhyme | |

Paper Thin

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
For kicks is why I do it now.
You tell me to love but I never knew how.
Our feet hitting pavement,
We spent the day in sunny California with sun kissed skin.
I’m learning to forget and how to fade scars,
And you let me let myself down so hard.

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
And now I just do it for smiles,
We’ll never see flower girls stumbling down aisles.
I’d lose my head just before that chance,
But if you want we can still have a first dance.
Cause I think I say things that I don’t mean,
Once upon a time you meant the world to me.

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
But I’m trying to refrain,
To make this not all end up in vain.
Maybe I can learn to love like some people do,
And you can learn to love yourself a little too.
Or it is in all fairness to let this go?
I guess we can try but then we’ll never know. 


Details | Sonnet | |

Sonnet For My Father

He was my father, he brought me home.
I was his second son, not so alone.
Something was taken, not far, but long,
today I remember, this lifeline is gone.

Broken foundations, bridges and stones,
teetering traces of my tears on his bones.
Emptied my pockets, nothing but loans,
never again will I reap what he sows.

Hold up the truth to the light as he fades,
I am the bridge that collapsed from the waves.
excuse to apology, attempts to explain,
love for my father is all that remains.

Look up to the sun, crown for his last day,
watching it set as his soul fades away.


Details | Romanticism | |

Together Again

A girl whom he'd forgotten
At his door, showed up the other day
The one he'd always wanted
Just knew not what to say

The boy she longed to hold
She caught his eyes once again
Of her love, to him, she never told
But this time, all her love, she will send

Once in a lifetime, and not one time more
Fate takes hold, luck is lent
From out of the blue, a miracle occurs
Hearts reunite, Together Again

She greets him with a smile
A sparkle in her eyes
For his love, she'd run for miles
To try this thing called love, just one time

Gazing at her beauty, he feels her in heart
Remembering those nights, with her, in his dreams
And how he felt at this whole love's start
Where they'd be one forever, to him, oh how it seemed

Well this girl's name was Katie, and his Steve
And oh how tears were shed, by them both, when they were forced to leave
But in the past that was, so now he holds her hand
Two angels together, forever they'll stand

Once in a lifetime, and not one time more
Fate takes hold, luck is lent
From out of the blue, a miracle occurs
Hearts reunite, Together Again

An old couple now, a lifetime of love
They've conquered all, risen together, above
Together, all the years, oh how they've spent
And to each other, all their love they have sent

Feeling each others hearts beating every morning
Through all the decades, all the happy years
Steve's heart though, one of these days, stopped without warning
And Katie's wrinkled face, moistened with tears

How could Katie live now, without her beloved by her side
Knowing that beside her, his heart slowly died?
She dreams every night now, just as he did before, of heaven
Where they'll be Together Again

Once in a lifetime, and not one time more
Fate takes hold, luck is lent
From out of the blue, a miracle occurs
Hearts reunite, Together Again


Details | I do not know? | |

Can't Be Friends

Before, while, and after I said goodbye
I couldn't help but sit there and cry.
I cried on and off for 7 hours and slept one
Woke up and cried again, I still wasn't even done.

Two more hours…wake up again.
Every so often a tear falls in the open.
I literally feel an aching pain in my chest
Thinking of how I lost you, wanting to forget.

I'm feeling sick and I still haven't ate.
I want you…my thoughts aren't straight.
Mane, almost every tweet...is about you
And almost every thought…is about who?

Someone who could have been playing me
Or showing me where my desires could lead.
I wanted to tell you everything, I wanted to say more,
There wasn't enough time and now my broken heart's feeling so sore.

I just wanna be alone and listen to this depressing song,
I can't get you out of my head... it hurts. Is that wrong?
I understand that I may be foolish wasting my time hurting over you.
But in all honesty my dear, I really wanted us to be something too. 


Details | Free verse | |

SEPARATION

SEPARATION 

The closeness we once had 
was a light shining in the dark. 
Storm clouds came 
and shielded the sun. 

The seeds atrophied 
and the sprouts withered. 
What was once a rainbow 
became a black and white
single brush stroke 
against a pale sky. 

CAK 9-2013


Details | Prose | |

I Just Found Out

I just found out that I have three months to live.
Only three months until the cancer that has grown
without my knowledge takes my life.
My doctor has known for some time,
But I just found out.
Less than a hundred times
I will see the sun rise to light the earth
Less than a hundred times
I will longingly watch its parting glow
Wondering if I will be there to see it again,
Hoping that I will have the grace to leave
In such resplendent glory.
Wondering what life would have been like
If I had been given the chance to marry and have children,
To grow old and retire; but I only have three months...
And I just found out.


Details | Rhyme | |

Fly away

Sitting here exchanging words
Lost like hungry - wingless birds
Hungry - lost like a homeless child
Running free and running wild
No matter which words we use
We know we both will lose

This is a war no one can win
we both turn the other chin
we both try another view
Try to find something new
But whatever we do or say
You know I can never stay

So I’ll fly away - fly way
I leave at night to find the day
Fly away fly away
You never thought I would stay
anyway

I always wanted to be the one
that fought the war and always won
When I am gone there is no war
Nothing to fight for any more
I hate the day so I’ll leave at night
To make my shadows shine on bright

You never saw the winds of change
Never heard our words grow strange
You never felt there was a war
or anything worth fighting for
So  wherever you will go from here
You will know that I’m not there


Details | Free verse | |

Like the frightened Jackrabbit, I run away from Love

Jump up and down like a jackrabbit
running through meadows
running from what?
Could it be heartbreak,
a venemous snake that hides in the grass,
hiding with fangs ready to pierce the tender skin
upon the tight, bronze flesh of everyday life?
Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye now!
I need a vacation a long way away from the faceless smiles
and ignorance of young girls, who don't look at you,
who don't show you love and respect.
Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye now,
as jumping spiders hop everywhere, crawling eight legs around me
my soul black like carcoal, but my heart still beating
slower this time, not like the days before
and like the jackrabbit running from anything and everything,
I run to seek love and vanish away from the empty voids
that people call, their souls.
Recording a film with no tape,
talking to a woman you love, but not having the guts to tell her how you really feel
Jump my boy, like a jackrabbit, take my advice
tell her before she leaves
turns down the endless avenues of endless dark love
the trees grow taller, taller than you
and you sit there feeling away yourself die, missing out in life.
I cannot see you lose your love.
Say it, say it, Say it!!! Tell her! Tell her! Build the guts up!
Build up the courage, tell her how you feel. Take her by the hand and never say goodbye! Never say goodnight, stay with her till the flight comes in the morning
of the first rays of sun shine through your dorm room take her and love her!
Do not be like me, the jackrabbit! I see no happiness
Reading poetry it makes me sad,
to write of others falling in love and I never finding the one.
People tell me, you'll find yours, have hope
but I am a frightened little jackrabbit
who flees from sounds of deep emotions, not having courage to fall in love,
not building the guts up to tell her how I really feel.
She walks alone, I find my oppertunity and sing my love song
She smiles and moves on,
please tell me I cannot fight anymore.
All I have to say is Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye
I need a vacation
to go to some sandy beach on an island of love
and write and write and write, the same poetry that depresses me
but makes you all fall in love with words!
Fiction about love stories, please kiss me
Blue eyed death comes, plays a game of chess with me
I bet twenty, he bets my soul
Kiss me death, the only love I'll ever get,
besides my poet friends who kiss my ass
Listen to my heart, truely, I don't write of beauty
I write for the sorrow soul, the fleeing jackrabbit
running away from love.....


Details | Ballade | |

My Dearest Daughter

I want you to know my dear daughter
I thought of you every day
The thought you say your daughter hates me
The question asked is how can a baby hate

The answer is, a baby learns what it is taught
I never raised you to hate in any way
To disrespect or live such a troubled way

You've hurt me like no other has
In such a way it no longer bothers me
Although I think of you more then you'll know
I no longer care if I see you again

You were my dearest, my one and only
And the day I gave birth to you
Gave me bragging rights in all that you do
I showed I was proud,  you didn't understand

Much time has gone by
I hardly think of you any more
The day will come, you will need me again
That day will be, when it's much too late

I won't be the one who will be so hurt
You will find that you waited much to late
My time will have ended on this dear earth
I will be gone, spending my time in Heaven

I will watch over my dear granddaughter
I will guide, guard and protect her
From the evil that you teach her
That my dear daughter is a promise

I will take care of her, from above
I will teach her how to love, honor and respect
Things I did teach you, you weren't paying attention

I want you to know my dearest daughter
I loved you before you were born
And I loved you 'till my dying day

I now love you from above
But now you're on your own without my love
Just remember this my dear daughter
You took the love I had to give my granddaughter
From her life, she'll never know

You cheated her, from a part of life
She will find out, and pay you back
When that happens, remember this
It's the same, you did to me


Details | I do not know? | |

Losing You

Crying over someone who's probably not even missing me.
My poor heart's steady crumbling like an eroded rock in the sea.
Walking around as if you haven't even crossed my mind
As soon as I get alone all this pain just reveals itself, unwinds.

I didn't think I'd lose you like this... I was unprepared.
Things like this? That's why attachment gives me such a scare.
You don't even know how much I'm hurting inside Edmond.
I'm crying again... haven't eaten... barely been sleeping.

So many ways for you to be taken from me, I didn't see this.
I'm so frustrated... I'm so sad... but not at all pissed.
My dad's reasonings are more than reasonable, I'll do as he says,
But I miss waking up to your voice... and those couple lettered texts.






I am so ...sad.


Details | Free verse | |

why daddy

dad you were my hero!
the one i wanted to be just like.
everything i did was to make you proud...
you walked out on us...
i know i wasnt a perfect child...
i just wanted to feel love from you

mom always told me that you would be there for me
you were until i disappointed you...
i thought parents were supposed love their children no matter what...
you didnt do that
 you always put me down 
told me i was such a shame to the family

now that i have grown up
i relieze life is better with out you in it...
and i no longer wanna be just like you
i could never walk out on my kid
you sicken me...
how could you give up the child that you gave your name to...
i understand you have other kids
but to just give up and not have anything to do with one of them
and to not let that kid know his siblings....
i could never do that 
no matter how much my kid disappointed me...

i found my hero...
he stepped up even tho he didnt have to...
he treated me like his own...
he was there when i needed a daddy and you werent there...
he was there at my worst....
and he is there at my best...
he will be my best man when i get married...
my kids will know him as grandpa...
they will never know you 
cause i cant risk you hurting my kids
the way you hurt me...

the thing that gets me the most is....
how you made it look so easy
did you even think about the lil boy
who carries your name and...
has your blood running in his veins

i dont think you did...
and if you did you are
a heartless piece of crap

even after all you have done to me...
physical, emotional, and mental abuse...
i forgive you...
not for you but for me so i can move on with me life


Details | Verse | |

Taken

I walked into a room not knowing 
what was going to happen.I see four beautiful faces
 with their Innocent smiles

All of them but one remembers me the three that seen who 
I was and ran over and gave a great warm hug

The one who doesn't remember me looked at me as if she 
never seen me before. A part of my heart cracked to the sight of it

They were given presents as an early Christmas.Delight filled 
their faces as they ripped off the decorated paper 

They ran around as kids do.We took so many pictures it
 was wonderful

They got a lot of food one of them with a bit of cake in one
 hand and sweets in the other and still wanting more

It was time for us to go I firmly hugged all three and then 
it came to the one who couldn't remember me I looked her 
in her little blues eyes and I opened my arms and she gave
 me the most love filled hug and her rosy red cheeks brushed 
up against mine

They were the most beautiful kids I ever saw in my life we
 finished up and I now knew why I was here.I walked out the
 door trying to hold in the river of tears ready to burst out from
 my eyes.they all waved goodbye but they didn't know it was the
 last goodbye they will ever say to me


Details | Rhyme | |

Their Final Farewell

Duty called once again for the warrior brave and true.
His loving family gathered about to wish him a sad adieu.
The somber skies cast a pall upon the poignant scene,
As they bid farewell to their hero, their United States Marine!

He held his parents and they whispered, "God go with you son.
We'll pray for your protection until your tour of duty is done.
Remember well the lessons in Sunday school that you were taught,
And that the Twenty-third Psalm will comfort you when you are distraught!"

He knelt holding Danny saying, "You're the man of the house now.
I love you, son!" and tenderly kissed him upon the brow.
To little Nan he said, "Keep that smile on your pretty face."
His eyes misted as he kissed her and held her in close embrace.

As his children clasped his legs he held his sweet wife near.
They promised eternal love vowing, "I'll always love you dear.
I'll hold you in my heart - I eagerly await a happier day!"
With a final kiss he grasped his duffel and slowly walked away.

'Twas to be his final battle and then he would at last retire,
To regale his children and grandchildren nigh a glowing fire.
Alas, 'twas not to be for on the field of strife he perished,
Sacrificing all for his nation and those he loved and cherished.

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c)  All Rights Reserved


Details | I do not know? | |

Pardon my Insanity

I don’t want freedom. Forgive me for sounding paranoid or crazy.
But this man used me. After knowing my history of pain. 
Now I see why people kill the victims and themselves.
Doing away with all evil its emancipation. 
At my wits end. Where sanity has eaten away my brains.
Where my soul has no resting place. And tears are like acid.
That burns through my cheeks. Pardon my insanity.
For I have fallen too many times. Where getting up is just powerless.
My heart is caged. All the impact and friction it took, For years.
And still it beats. Keeping me alive to face another brutal blow.
Pain so severe. No medicine or words of encouragement
Can put me at peace. Love is inadmissible here.
For I am deceased .

01/17/13

 


Details | Free verse | |

Let Me Go

Let Me Go!
I don't want this anymore!
I can't go to sleep at night,
all I seem to do is write.

Sometimes I read...
I read until I finish.
When I finally go to sleep,
I hear the sound of the alarm "BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!"

Oh gosh,
I can't handle this anymore.
I am going crazy here
and no one seems to notice it, my dear.

I cry myself to sleep.
telling myself everything will get better.
BUT IT DOESN'T!
And I know I mustn't

but I want that knife
just as much as I want that gun
I hate this world
and everything about this girl

She sings and tries to get attention
yet no one gives her the time of day.
She falls into the books she reads
no one knowing, it is escaping, she pleads.

This girl is me,
oh but you knew, right?
Since all I ever talk about is me!
Gosh, can't you see?

I'm my enemy!
I'm my own nightmare!
No one is hurting me!
It is me who shouldn't be let free!

Lock me up! 
Kill me!
That way I won't harm myself...
I'd like it if it was someone else

Please, do me the favor
and let me go
for no one can save this girl
from this cruel world.


Details | I do not know? | |

REST IN PEACE MUM ANN BROWN 18 AUG 2011

MUM ...

WHERE DO I START? I DON'T THINK THERE IS WORDS , TO EXPLAIN HOW I AM 


FEELING ABOUT THE LOSS OF YOU... BUT I WILL USE ALL THE STRENGTH YOU HAVE 


GIVEN TO ME , SO I CAN GET THESE FINAL WORDS OUT THE GUILT , SADNESS AND 

REGRET  FROM NOT SEEING YOU LIKE I WANTED TO  SO ****ING MUCH ,

 THEN THE PAIN OF NOT HAVING  A CHANCE TO SAY "GOODBYE" TO THE MOST 

BEAUTIFUL MOTHER COULD WANT, AND YES MUM I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUTO HOLD 

YOUR HAND, TO SEE YOU SMILE , TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, WOULD MAKE MY LIFE MORE 

WORTHWHILE. YOU TAUGHT ME HOW TO LIVE, BUT YOU NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO 

LIVE WITHOUT YOU I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MUM, BUT THE LOVE IN MY HEART FOR YOU , WILL MAKE SURE 

YOUR LIFE , LOVE , WARMTH AND TOUCH , WILL LIVE ON FOREVER , 

IN ME I KNOW THAT YOU CHANGED ME , JUST FROM YOUR 

PRESENCE...THATS'S HOW STRONG YOU WERE MUM I KNOW YOU HAVEN'T LEFT ME , 

FOR THE LOVE IN MY HEART REMAINS , YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO SUFFER AND YOUR 

BODY WILL FEEL NO PAIN...... GOD TOOK YOUR HAND , AND MADE US PART , HE CLOSED 

YOUR EYES , AND BROKE MY HEART ....FOR ALL THE TIMES WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER,

I WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR FACE.

THERE IS NO MOTHER ANYWHERE LIKE YOU,

NO ONE COULD TAKE YOUR PLACE.

IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN YOU WERE LEAVING,

I GUESS I EXPECTED YOU TO FOREVER LAST,

ALL OF THE DREAMS OF US IN THE FUTURE,

ARE NOW BUT MEMORIES OF THE PAST.

GOD TAPPED YOU ON THE SHOULDER,

HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW,

THAT YOU WERE GOING WITH HIM,

TO THE SKY SO BEAUTIFUL BLUE.

ALTHOUGH I MAY NEVER SEE YOU MUM,

ARJAY WILL BE BY YOUR SIDE,

HE'S GONNA HOLD YOUR HAND,

AND LEAD THE WAY,

FOR HE WILL BE YOUR GUIDE.....

I LOVE YOU MY MOTHER.....
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU UNDERSTAND, 
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU KNOW,
DON'T TELL ME THAT I WILL SURVIVE,
HOW I WILL SURELY GROW.
DON'T TELL ME THIS IS JUST A TEST,
THAT I AM TRULY BLESSED,
THAT I AM CHOSEN FOR THIS TASK,
APART FROM ALL THE REST.
DON'T COME AT ME WITH  ANSWERS THAT CAN ONLY COME FROM ME,
DON'T TELL ME HOW MY GRIEF WILL PASS,
THAT I WILL SOON BE FREE.
DON'T STAND IN PIOUS JUDGMENT OF THE BONDS I MUST UNTIE,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO SUFFER,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO CRY.
MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH SELFISHNESS,
MY PAIN IS ALL I SEE,
BUT I  NEED YOU,
I NEED YOU YOUR LOVE UNCONDITONALLY.
ACCEPCT ME IN MY UPS AND DOWNS,
I NEED SOMEONE TO SHARE,
JUST TO HOLD MY HAND AND LET ME CRY,
AND SAY, MY FRIEND I REALLY DO CARE
Mom you mean the world to me
It’s hard to live without you ,You were always by my side
Through thick and thin you helped me


Details | Free verse | |

To a love ill never let go of, sorry

you whispered sweet doubts into my ears
but i was so blind to acknowledge the fears
ill never regret how i felt for you 
but you seem so far gone, i don't know what to do

i only did what i thought was right
but i guess i lost all fear and extinguished the light

Bay, i wish i never left 
but its to late to take it back

Bay, i wish i had some sort of sign
to know your OK

i have this horrible habit of making a mess of things
you might think it funny
but i jump when the phone rings

i hope you dont blame me for what happened 
but then again it must have been my fault
im sorry

i guess all those times i apologized were in advance
for the heartbreak that i probably brought down upon you
bay, im sorry, im sorry, im sorry if you ever read this
you'll finally understand the way i still feel about you 

nobody ever said it was easy 
but nobody ever said i would fall this hard

i miss you 

im sorry
im sorry 
im sorry 
im sorry
im sorry

please bay, im sorry 
please bay 



Details | Blank verse | |

Letting Go

Let me stow 
Or let me throw
Away our love 
That died a while ago.

Let me wallow 
Or let me know
That you can 
Free me from my woe.

Let me grow 
Or let me show
Why I may never 
Truly let you go.

Let me go 
Or let me know
That you will 
Always love me so.

Let me sow 
Or let me bestow
All of my hope for us 
To again be struck by cupid’s bow.


Details | Free verse | |

Her Final Words

"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one. 
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Her sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed. 
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent. 
A meager thought 
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
Her curse.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows, 
"Save them."


Details | Rhyme | |

The last Letter

The hardest thing I had to do?
The day I said goodbye to you.
We sat there and our words were few
Yet in that moment I just knew,
This is our last goodbye.
You didn't cry it's not your style
And you and I each wore a smile
But both were thinking all the while
You'll soon be there on high.

I never thought my love could grow
But being there it was just so.
We'd sit and let our love just flow,
Then came the day I had to go
We said our last goodbye.
Now daddy what you did not see
Is how my heart broke inwardly?
Those gentle words must comfort me
You'll soon be there on high.

09.05.2014


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Letter to bereaved ones

         I beg your forgiveness for I am not long for this world. Happenstance has led me down this path so crooked and forlorn. Misery has preceded my path and darkened my senses all but torn. Mistakes have illuminated my way though their light be a fallacy; an illusion to comfort a tortured mind, riddled with confusion and false fancy. ‘Tis only just to forgive me sisters, I am not long for this world. 

          An image wreaks havoc with my memory. A picture so horrendous the effects of its trauma echo through the hallways of time. The sight that for all my life I was so grateful to possess, leads me now to curse what gods may be that granted it me. For surely had I never seen the sight of him, cold and lifeless, I would have eventually endeavoured to be healed in my spirit. The fault is mine; it was never him but I that had the capacity to change. ‘Tis only right to forgive me father, I am not long for this world. 

       My middle name should rather have been disappointment. That is all I have ever delivered to her who brought me into the world and nurtured an infant into a lady. I call her Gaia, that is her spirit name.  My existence has put lines on her face prematurely and caused her to despair time and time again. The audacity of me now to leave this earth without ever having produced for her a grandchild. The insolence of leaving only words to counter the preponderance of condolences from rejoicing enemies that shall now assail and abuse her. My soul is repentant, twas never the intent to hurt your heart dear Gaia. ; Tis only compassionate to forgive me mother, I am not long for this world. 

       As for the empty future that awaits me. No children to carry on the memory of me. No great achievements to render my life the content of legend. No great works to immortalise me in poem and prose. No others to mourn the passing of a life most unremarkable. Nothing but things, regrettable decisions, words left unsaid and the cold sound of silence to mark that most auspicious event. Death finds me waiting and unafraid with only the last words to pass from these lips; ‘tis only fair to forgive me self, for we are not long for this world.


Details | Rhyme | |

If I die before I wake

As I die he will be with me,
I fell in love he had the key,
And always knelt on one knee.

My last thoughts are of him, 
As the lights go dim,
Life circling on a rim.

All at once we are apart,
The taste is so tart,
It all hits me in the heart.

You are left to live,
My heart your captive,
There is nothing to forgive.

My cheeks blush so shy,
With a tear in my eye,
As I start to die.

Fear not for I am well,
As many up here can tell,
It is not quite hell.

As I look from above,
kissing the forehead of my love,
I wonder what he dreams of.

I look at him so fondly,
his lips curve so grandly,
as he sleeps so soundly.

I'm like a hummingbird fluttering over his bed,
I wish to be with him but I am dead,
My life over and has fled.

I fear for my love for he is kind,
Strong handsome and well lined,
But now I leave him way behind.

Finding love is like a quiz,
Never knowing what it is,
He needs love from a heart as strong as his.


Details | Prose Poetry | |

I Hope You Know I'll Always Love You

I am what you call a hopeless 
romantic,
But im also a lost lovers cause, my 
heart belongs to another
Yet in my head a love triangle starts 
to form, the girl I love doesn’t love 
me
She holds the heart to another and 
mine caged to the floor,
She isn’t afraid to fight for what she 
wants, not even when it comes to 
leaving another man torn
Trust me she’s happy, as that boy 
holds her heart ever so close
Seeing what I shouldn’t I smile as I 
wear my blind fold,
Blind to everything around, lifeless 
staring into air
My train of thought running so fast, 
the second I stop you’ll hear a crash
Derailing my hope, for ever finding a 
love so pure & rare
Wishing I could hold the hand of the 
lover who stole my flame,
Wish I could change the last days in 
which we parted ways,
Realizing now that we can never be 
the same
Finally saying it out loud as tears run 
down my face
You stole my happiness, as I walked 
away that day
But it’s because as of what you said 
I guessed I changed,
Now every relationship has just be 
the same,
No one can seem to bring back that 
flame,
Because a love likes ours comes 
once in a lifetime
Well at least it does to me,
But I mean you’re happy with who 
your with 
I mean I only wrote this as I heard 
exchanging “I love you” flow from 
each of your lips.


Details | Couplet | |

GOODBYE

The leaves are crying 
Winter takes charge

The daylight is gone 
Quietness takes place

The church bell is ringing goodbye 
Angels are singing welcome

The time is getting high 
Check out what is left behind 

So quicker than thought 
Yet a life is gone 

Everyone will go this journey 
Time unknown to anyone is the reason for this goodbye in tears


Details | Lyric | |

End It

End It
By: IzaDonna

My demons crouch real low
Seeping out of me real slow
The pain protectively covered
Darkening memories like no other
But I hide behind a smile
This life not seeming worth while
The blade I have is ready to go
Life already being at an all time low
So bring on the darkness
i no longer have a purpose

Chorus
I push you away to protect you
My sickness n pain being nothing new
So save yourself from my sorrow
Cause I won't live to see tomorrow
You deserve someone better
So let me be and go find her

Loneliness is my own choice
Feeling so lost with no voice
So I let each day slip by
Everyday just wanting to die
What have I become
Where did all this pain come from
Being left alone is my desire
The spark going out in my fire
My days I feel are at an end
Too far gone to possibly mend

Chorus

So bring on the darkness
I've lost my purpose


Details | Lyric | |

Sad Love

Lawd, last night I heard you call my name 
And I knew I was dreaming just the same. 
Lawd, last night I heard you call my name 
And I knew I was dreaming just the same. 
Sometimes, I think I should have stayed. 

Just didn't know what you were thinkin' 
When you saw me walking out the door. 
Just didn't know what you were thinkin' 
When you saw me walking out the door. 
Well, I guess it don't matter anymore. 

I saw you sitting there by the railroad tracks. 
Didn't you have your face down in your hands? 
I saw you sitting there by the railroad tracks. 
Didn't you have your face down in your hands? 
It sure was a sad love that we had. 
 



Details | Romanticism | |

Nothing I Can Do

There's this one girl I love I'm really missing
Hour by hour, and every second too
Remembering nights of lakeside kissing
But There's Nothing I Can Do

She was everything to me
A cool winter's breeze...
A warm summer's shore...
But oh how the time really flew
When she'd come knocking on my door
Now there's Nothing I Can Do

And while the days continue drifting past
My love for her still lasts
So I'll send it everyday to my love, just for you
Because there's really nothing more
There's nothing else
There's Nothing I Can Do


Details | Free verse | |

Bullets rain tears

Young and innocent they went to school
 Expecting to learn and play
 Never in anyones wildest of dreams
 Did we expect that day
 For a rain of tears to shell them
 From one lost deep to sin
 But heavenly hosts came down for them
 Releasing them from him
 The devil he did have his day
 But God in end dost win
 For noubt will be lost but these young lives
 Will not be gone in vain
 The laws of the land will change in ways
 For it must not happen again
 
Those who reign must stand on this
 Take stance and make a difference
 No one should be able to take a life
 With intent nor mindless innocence
 For even when with madmans mind
 You cannot be left to mingle
 How can you be able to walk in shop
 Purchase guns and not be liable
 Actions speak far louder than words
 And if we let just one slip through
 Without accounting for their sin
 It might well be me or you
 
For on anyone these bullets
 Might be named to fall upon
 So make a difference – make a change
 Add your name – petition
 The whole wide world mourns in shame
 An Amnesty is long past needed
 Write your letters – use your vote
 Act now while it is fresh
 And pray for the souls of all those lost
 That each by the Lord be blessed
 Also for those who’ve lived through this
 That they might find a way
 To find the strength and courage
 To step out further each day


Details | Lyric | |

Bruises

Bruises
By: IzaDonna

Surrounded by darkness
Emotions hidden away
Bruises disguised with smiles
Never would think it
That my past still haunts me
The scars still completely cover me
I hide them so you can't see
I'm really not at all okay

Chorus
The bottles eases the pain
The dust numbs the ache
Can I ever just forgive?
Instead up building up this hate
I just want to find peace
I want my smile to be real
But its hard to do so
When I can no longer seem to feel

Frightening dreams keep me awake
Forever replaying in my mind
Life seems to be so much longer
This winding road so much harder
Can I just get a release
Beat these inner demons and be free
Or do I have to be forever cursed
With the ghosts of the past

Chorus

I look up at the stars
And close my eyes tight
Its time for last good-byes
Its time to end this tonight
I take one last chug
And fall to the ground
Take one last gasp
And then no longer make a sound

Chorus

I'm finally okay


Details | I do not know? | |

We Said Goodbye a Thousand Times

We Said Goodbye a Thousand Times

Don’t be sad about my parting
Don’t feel like you never said goodbye
For you and I both know deep in our hearts
That We Said Goodbye a Thousand Times
And shared so much love and joy every day
 
Be happy that I am now at peace
Be joyful that I have lived a wonderful life
Be happy that we have shared so much together
 
And remember I am always with you in a thought and a sigh
Every day when you see the beauty in nature think of me
Every day when you see the colorful flowers think of me
Every day when you see a frisky animal prancing around think of me
Every day when you look into the eyes of someone you love think of me
 
And know beyond a doubt that I am with you in everything you do
And know beyond a doubt that I am with you in everything you say
And know beyond a doubt that I am with you in every quiet moment of your life
 
Don’t be sad about my parting
Don’t feel like you never said goodbye
For you and I both know deep in our hearts
That We Said Goodbye a Thousand Times
And shared so much love and joy every day


Details | I do not know? | |

Good bye

The time has come for us to say good bye.
My heart is shattered thou I don't know why.

My body and soul feel so old
All I wanted was you to hold.

I wish for just once you looked my way
and you not being there led me astray.

Time goes by and life goes on
But, all I have left is the memory
of our song.


Details | Rhyme | |

EYE Don't See -Part 3-

My eyes
Witness your departure
My eyes
Are dripping with hopelessness…
My eyes start to blur…
Melancholy put me under pressure…
Is there a cure to my disease? 

You don’t see
The shards of hope that once brought us back together
Just let me search for safety
I’m strong enough to realize that I’m no longer
The weakest prey out there…

And I’m left in my solitude…
Do you hear me whimpering like a distraught puppy left on the train tracks?

I’m close to my demise…save me and take me home

Nourish me…and be my beloved friend

Will this friendship last forever?

Hopefully it has no end

Will this cheerful moment help us get along with each other?

Because of you…I feel the need to run 
I keep an eye on you – I worry that you’ll hurt yourself again
Because of you…My freedom is nearly gone
I don’t wanna be caught off guard again
Because of you…EYE can’t picture a solution for our vexing dilemma 
Because of you…eye can’t focus on my long-term goal 

And I’m left in my solitude…
Do you sense that I’m giving in to failure? 
And I’m close to my demise…
Only to find myself disappear…I can’t endure 
The hardships that you place upon me…
Could you boost up my confidence to overcome 
My atrocious anxiety? 

I’m just waiting for some sun
To keep me in good hands…
To strengthen me with perseverance …
I’m just waiting until His son
Leads the world outtah Egypt and reveals to us…
His radiance…His dazzling Kingdom – 
Vibrant with glee

Your undying sympathy dawns upon us
I’m overflowing with indescribable joy  
You’re a candle in the night…
We meet eye to eye…
What a sight…what a precious sight


Details | Free verse | |

An Emptiness Inside

~An Emptiness Inside~

Right now I'm sitting here
Staring into space
Feeling so all alone

As tears begin to fill my eyes
And I begin to cry
My heart suddenly feels an emptiness inside
That here lately I just cannot hide

If only you were here to hold me,
I'd feel so protected...
With you by my side

My world feels so sad and blue
Feeling as though I'm forever going to lose you
Our love I thought was forever true?

You told me just the other night
That I was only a simple friend
I then began to believe that our relationship
Was only just pretend

I've pleaded with you to help make
This relationship of ours last
Baby, I beg of you...
Let's not dwell on the past

I'm so sorry if I have hurt you
But never forget my love for you
Was always true

Baby, I pray that I can 
Mend your broken heart
But for now I will continue to look forward
Day by day
Pray continually...
That we never, ever drift apart


Details | Light Poetry | |

Though Apart, Will Always Be Together

why do you have to leave now? denial has been my pill and collapse seem inevitable if I stop. How can I hold time responsible for this? Is there a way to put it behind bars? I stand as a helpless kitten watching its mother taken for sale I weep as a Nation whose King is going captive to foreign lands. And like a young chick fatally exposed to flying Eagles. My mind says its for good but my heart refuses to comprehend. As true as you are climbing up the ladder, my feelings had wished; that ladder should be my presence. How can I recover from the smiles you manufacture in me from no raw materials? Who can replace the immense kindness you shower as a default to your being? You've now created my days of sad songs sang without sounds nor instruments. My days are now getting longer and my nights darker than darkness. Memories of you are life itself and no matter how I try your absence entails the removal of my Life's support. Leaving me, has caused the most delicious of meals and the finest materials of silk, cotton and polyesthers all to turn my taste and appetite sour. When will I ever see you friend? Am I really going to meet you there? Or is this the end of our world? You leave me with many questions and a great deal of uncertainty. Swear to me my dear make me this promise and please be faithful to your Oath. That though apart, we will always be together. That my pain now, is worth it and at the end we will come back and be re-united in a much more intense and unshakable bond. I greatly weep as I say goodbye cos it is difficult doing it, while looking into your eyes. GOOD BYE FRIEND!


Details | Questionku | |

Far from Mind- Questionku String

it seems to be true
when far from site...far from mind
why must this be so

my heart aches for friends
the circle is getting small
should I join them too

what seems to connect
are these strings made of choice words
will silence sever

just one of a crowd
the glory days have all gone
will love still remain

Eileen Manassian


Details | I do not know? | |

Free

Closed eyes.
Deep breath.
Count to ten.
It's not the end.
A change. For the best.
I'm stronger.
I never needed you
I was just afraid.
I let the fear of being alone, Hold me down.


Details | Quatern | |

Fate says goodbye

The rare chance entered and I leapt
Would this chance arise once more
Visions of fate have now been kept
One more goodbye now is in store

Sadness, however, does not loom
The rare chance entered and I leapt
I write these words of certain doom
I pondered by night while I crept

A long cold walk, with no hope left
Stubbornness my refuge last night
The rare chance entered and I leapt  
Yes these words have a little spite

Before I ran, but this time walked
I can’t forget, and have not slept
Tell me why we would have talked
The rare chance entered and I leapt


Details | Rhyme | |

Her Eyes

The ghostly eye returns
My stomach forevermore churns
I could feel its sick visions swelter the atmosphere
I could feel me giving into my fears
Feeling the shift slowly rise
Tonight was the night I would look into her eyes
To find only. . .tears


Details | I do not know? | |

REST IN PEACE MUM ANN BROWN 18 AUG 2011

MUM ...

WHERE DO I START? I DON'T THINK THERE IS WORDS , TO EXPLAIN HOW I AM 


FEELING ABOUT THE LOSS OF YOU... BUT I WILL USE ALL THE STRENGTH YOU HAVE 


GIVEN TO ME , SO I CAN GET THESE FINAL WORDS OUT THE GUILT , SADNESS AND 

REGRET  FROM NOT SEEING YOU LIKE I WANTED TO  SO ****ING MUCH ,

 THEN THE PAIN OF NOT HAVING  A CHANCE TO SAY "GOODBYE" TO THE MOST 

BEAUTIFUL MOTHER COULD WANT, AND YES MUM I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUTO HOLD 

YOUR HAND, TO SEE YOU SMILE , TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, WOULD MAKE MY LIFE MORE 

WORTHWHILE. YOU TAUGHT ME HOW TO LIVE, BUT YOU NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO 

LIVE WITHOUT YOU I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MUM, BUT THE LOVE IN MY HEART FOR YOU , WILL MAKE SURE 

YOUR LIFE , LOVE , WARMTH AND TOUCH , WILL LIVE ON FOREVER , 

IN ME I KNOW THAT YOU CHANGED ME , JUST FROM YOUR 

PRESENCE...THATS'S HOW STRONG YOU WERE MUM I KNOW YOU HAVEN'T LEFT ME , 

FOR THE LOVE IN MY HEART REMAINS , YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO SUFFER AND YOUR 

BODY WILL FEEL NO PAIN...... GOD TOOK YOUR HAND , AND MADE US PART , HE CLOSED 

YOUR EYES , AND BROKE MY HEART ....FOR ALL THE TIMES WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER,

I WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR FACE.

THERE IS NO MOTHER ANYWHERE LIKE YOU,

NO ONE COULD TAKE YOUR PLACE.

IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN YOU WERE LEAVING,

I GUESS I EXPECTED YOU TO FOREVER LAST,

ALL OF THE DREAMS OF US IN THE FUTURE,

ARE NOW BUT MEMORIES OF THE PAST.

GOD TAPPED YOU ON THE SHOULDER,

HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW,

THAT YOU WERE GOING WITH HIM,

TO THE SKY SO BEAUTIFUL BLUE.

ALTHOUGH I MAY NEVER SEE YOU MUM,

ARJAY WILL BE BY YOUR SIDE,

HE'S GONNA HOLD YOUR HAND,

AND LEAD THE WAY,

FOR HE WILL BE YOUR GUIDE.....

I LOVE YOU MY MOTHER.....
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU UNDERSTAND, 
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU KNOW,
DON'T TELL ME THAT I WILL SURVIVE,
HOW I WILL SURELY GROW.
DON'T TELL ME THIS IS JUST A TEST,
THAT I AM TRULY BLESSED,
THAT I AM CHOSEN FOR THIS TASK,
APART FROM ALL THE REST.
DON'T COME AT ME WITH  ANSWERS THAT CAN ONLY COME FROM ME,
DON'T TELL ME HOW MY GRIEF WILL PASS,
THAT I WILL SOON BE FREE.
DON'T STAND IN PIOUS JUDGMENT OF THE BONDS I MUST UNTIE,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO SUFFER,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO CRY.
MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH SELFISHNESS,
MY PAIN IS ALL I SEE,
BUT I  NEED YOU,
I NEED YOU YOUR LOVE UNCONDITONALLY.
ACCEPCT ME IN MY UPS AND DOWNS,
I NEED SOMEONE TO SHARE,
JUST TO HOLD MY HAND AND LET ME CRY,
AND SAY, MY FRIEND I REALLY DO CARE
Mom you mean the world to me
It’s hard to live without you ,You were always by my side
Through thick and thin you helped me


Details | I do not know? | |

Why me

Why me
Why me dear god 
Why the hell me!
I did all you asked 
I’ve even played the card 
Of a good girl, the one 
Everyone wanted me to be.
Why can’t you save me.
I’m hurting immensely 
And no one care not even slightly.
How could you allow me to fall 
So deep, so far into misery.
I’ve grown to hate myself so much so
I’m that demon within the angel 
That you see.
I’m crying out for help
And not once did you show me sympathy.
Like everyone else you pretend to care
My prayers are just words you refuse to here.
You watched the tears ran down my cheeks
And didn’t send an angel to watch over me.
I don’t want to be part of this world anymore
Just set me free….
Sleeping forever is where I are to be.

05/05/09


Details | Senryu | |

12-21-12

The end of the world — 
I will see you all in hell.
May I rest in peace.


Details | ABC | |

Sometimes I Like To Pretend Things Never Came To A End

Sometimes I like to pretend, things never came to a end. But over time, our love became a crime. I didn't know what we had, would ever end so bad. But then I knew things weren't right, when we started to fight. Now I walk down memory lane all the time, the pain is worst then committing a crime. We only caused eachother pain, but we were eachothers maine. I thought things would be alright, but I cried alot that night. I don't want things to change, without you my life is strange. You said you wanted me so much it started to hurt that you couldn't wait, now im just another person you hate. When you said you didn't care, I knew the person I loved was no longer there. You aren't the same, the new you is lame. We both fell, now it's hell. You use to always be here for me, like family. But now your nowhere in sight, things aren't right. Empty is all that I can feel, I still can't believe this is real. I didn't mean to let you get away, I didn't know what to say. Am i with the right guy, or am i telling myself a lie. I was afraid to loose what we had, but to you that choice was bad.


Details | Free verse | |

Chair of Death

On a cool afternoon for tea,
She sat in that chair,
Humming for our silence;
Her bones quivering the instrumentals
Within the ruffles of the skin.
When her tune came to an end,
She took time to turn our way.
Not because she felt obliged 
That she had all the time in the world,
But because her youth had shredded
To make her nothing but one
Who hoped for time.
For the painstaking moments passed
And we locked eyes.
She fought her raging wrinkles to smile
And nod my way.

Perhaps she tried too hard
To say a decent goodbye.

One would think he keeps it
Because he has to.
We'd sit on the floor first
Before we touch that chair.
For it encases you, 
Tightens its weight upon you
And hums so sweetly between the ear and soul,
The sounds of a sour, unsaid farewell.


Details | I do not know? | |

after math

laying on my bed
I'm going over everything
my mind wonders to the day
a week ago I tried to leave this world
trying to understand my choice

now as i see I'm being watched
now I see my bedroom door is gone
now I see I'm being treated as a crazy person
now I see my life is changing
now I see the aftermath of everything

I'm staring at nothing 
my mind is blank
my eyes are dead
I'm trying to think
I'm trying to live

now as I see my live changed
now I see I'll never be the same
Now I see the life I lived
the life I lived was a lie it's self
the life I lived was so different now

lying on my bed
I looked at the window
thinking about jumping
I looked at the mirror
and now I see the true me


now as I see myself 
I see the pain I was in
now as I see myself
I see the hate I feel for myself
now as I see myself I hate myself

now I see everything I did 
now I see the aftermath
now I see the pain I put my family in
now I see the aftermath
now I see the aftermath


Details | Senryu | |

Just another one

It is hard to miss
A person you never knew
Which is all she was.


Details | Rhyme | |

Be Her

You see her?
Why don't go be like her?
No one likes you,
so this is what you must do.

You must stop being yourself,
get off of you shelf.
You must please everyone,
to do that, you must be number one.

She's the perfect girl,
you're the no one in the world.
So go ahead, and give yourself away,
since you're going the wrong way.

You are no longer you,
see what you can do.
You are now her,
that's better than what you ever were.


Details | Free verse | |

My Mask

It hurts all the time
This pain in me never stops
I want to cry for you
I want to scream for you
I want to beg for you
I want you to be here
This cant be fair
This cant be real

But I smile and I laugh
I get up every morning to go to work
Throw on a happy face and make some jokes
I come home and enjoy my day
I have fun
And I continue on
But I’m so hurt
I’m so lost

Seeing you in there killed me
I could never get the phone call out my head
The screams from my mom
The walk up there to see if it was true
But most of all I wont forget you
In the casket
Touching your hand
You were so cold
You didn’t belong there
Seeing you go into the ground
Seeing them fall apart
Feeling my heart break into pieces
When all I could do is scream
I will never forget that day

And every time I smile I want to cry
Every time I laugh I want to cry
Every time I think I want to cry
Every breath I take takes a little bit out of me
Because I want to cry

I want this to not be real
I want to had spend more time with you
I want to hug you
Laugh with you 
Tell you I love you
That I was always there
That I am still always here

I am so broken
But I continue on with life

Because God took you and not me
He wanted me here for a reason
So ill continue on for
You
I will laugh
And smile
And pretend
Anything to make it to the end
To see you

I miss you just isn’t enough
It doesn’t mean enough


What heals a broken heart?
Time they say

But time wont bring you back
So my heart stays broken
As I pretend to smile

I miss you
I miss you
I miss you


As I’m falling apart

My mask then goes on



RIP Bebo... 17 was to young


Details | Free verse | |

I See You Everywhere

What do I say now? Where do I start?
Without you beside me, I'm falling apart
Thinking of you, know it isn't too smart
But I See You Everywhere, oh my poor heart

Love in her ways
She drifts slowly past me
A spring in her step
Oh she's moving too fastly
Upside down now
She turns my heart and soul
Reflecting in my mind
And in my heart, a hole
Every time she crosses my mind
I'm reminded of the pain
No chance to love her
She'll forget my name

So what do I say now? And where do I start?
Because without you beside me girl, I'm falling apart
Thinking of you, I know it isn't too smart
But I Still See You Everywhere, and oh my poor heart


Details | Rhyme | |

On a Bench

Sitting on a bench
she met him one day
in the park, he passed by
and stole her heart away

sitting on a bench,
when he told her he'd be gone for a year
the army needed soldiers
and she was left with her fear

sitting on a bench
in the summer, in the fall
the leaves fell away
and she waited through all

sitting on a bench
while the snow came and went
while the grass turned back green
and less letters were sent

sitting on a bench
one year later, anticipating
sitting on a bench
where she still is found waiting


Details | Free verse | |

Goodbye, Farewell

Goodbye, farewell There is a time for everything But time for me has drawn its wings back away Leaving me to the sad hellos of today Do I wish to embellish in the sounds of your pain? Or will I take the back way into town to seek the reigns? Tension like ice crackles at the sound of departure Sometimes leaving it alone is harder I never expressed the selfish growths of my pride I am sickened in darkness, stuck in this mind Where is the heart when one needs the goodbye? Where is the mind when I break down and cry? Goodbye, farewell I never amounted to much Though I was granted everything My wings are folded too tightly with time The meat is tucked beneath and only I feed On the breadth of my own luscious nourishment Will I crush you with indifference? Silently beat you with fervent fury? Will I flood with tears of inward emotion? The sick selfishness one masks as devotion! Heat melts away the ice Replaced by tethered spite Goodbye, farewell! Before the night sweeps you away I never will cherish this today I will let the time dive into the abyss With the greetings and salutations one will never miss I will ride into the fiery skies with no care but my own Landing in turbulent waters in winds that moan There is a reason but it is unknown And that is how it will always be Can’t you see this is good for you? This is the only way—I fear for you Abandonment is only an emotion So, goodbye, farewell


Details | Blank verse | |

My Heart

I gave you my heart,
whole and so loving,
but you tore it up,
then gave the pieces back.
But you kept one,
keeping me broken,
incomplete.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Truth That Was Hidden

I'm  sitting here in this room,
thinking to myself about the past.
How I had bloom...
though, it didn't last.

God, everyday I am lying.
Everyday I put on my mask.
I always end up crying
since no one dares to ask.

I stopped talking to my friends,
cut them all loose.
For this is the end,
and we all knew I would lose.

Everyone around me thinks I'm better.
since all they see are lies.
They should know better!
Even though I'm in disguise.

I put on my fake smile
and laugh along with everyone around me.
I think everyone is in denial
since they can't obviously see

They act like nothing happened.
like... I faked the whole incident.
They honestly don't know what happened,
or why I caused that incident.

They believe that I was never "broken"
just that I wanted attention.
I should have never spoken
and give them my full attention.

No one knows I've been skipping my pills,
everyone thinks I take them.
Maybe I'm saving them for the kill?
Who knows what I plan to do with them.

I throw up everyday,
only because I've grown used to it.
No one understands my ways
or why I keep quiet.

Sometimes, when I'm alone
and I see something I could use to harm myself.
I check to make sure I'm on my own
and start to look at myself.

First, I cry...because I oh so much hate my body.
Then, I hurt myself.
Proving that I am nobody.
and since I'm alone, and with no one else

I continue doing this 
until I see a drop of blood,
then it feels like bliss.
I continue sometimes, craving the blood.

Then when it gets too much,
I sit down
thinking... no one knows I do such
if they did...would they let me drown?

I bet they would.
Since everyone I have come to love, 
leaves me..just like they should.
because I'm nothing from above.

You might think I'm a blessing.
ha, I'm a curse.
I bet you were messing,
and just tried to keep it from getting worse.

but let me get this straight,
nothing you say or do,
will get me to leave this gate.
For this gate is where I was left to

be on my own.
to forget about help.
I was always alone,
never having anyone's help.

Just let me be,
I don't need your sympathy.
Can't you see?
It doesn't matter to me!

I'd rather have everyone hate me
than have you all pretend
because believe it or not, I can see
through all your acts that should come to an end.

You aren't my friend,
so leave me now.
This my end,
you mustn't know how.

I will write back soon,
for this is my only comfort.
I only shall come at the time of the moon,
for that is my hour of comfort.


Details | I do not know? | |

It Happened

I hated myself.
I hate myself 
I am hating myself.
Torture.
Is what I do to myself at 2:33am when I'm thinking about how much of a waste I've become, am becoming and how I think, think about how no difference will be made if I was not here. Walking, talking, eating, breathing, living. 
Just take it all away - it turns me upside down, inside out when I can't stop those wheels from turning in my head; they never stop - like some unstoppable tape record playing in my head- over and over and over again.
I don't sleep to good.
Maybe it's the way I say your name at that present moment in time and my mind automatically swells with 
Nostalgia.
Or maybe it's the way I always think of your pretty big eyes that are the perfect shade of brown in the midst of my sorrows. 
We once shared those. 
But now they're just unequally balanced upon my shoulders, wreaking havoc in the last of the ruins that have been provided.
Oh look what I've gone and done.
I wanted to be alone not lonely. 
I hate myself for what I have done to myself
Sadness is what I have become,
Consumed me in a way that is not visible to the naked eye- so only I can see.
It hits me at any given time of day - it slams against the mental capacity I have for the self loathing I have assimilated throughout my tiresome life.
All the self regret and self deprecation that has surfed through my mind during those lonely nights I laid there motionless and bitter have finally come and took over. 
My mind, body and soul.
My troublesome inner demons taunt me. We are no longer shy acquaintances, we are the best of friends who spend each passing hour of the day together. 
I don't want to live this way. Nor do I want to die this way, I'm entitled to spend the days of my life as openly and freely as I please but I still have sinking feeling - this clawing sensation, drawing me back to my sadness. Like a heroin junkie high as a kite - I'm addicted. And I don't know how. I'm addicted to my sadness and there's no cure for that.
I have to go now.
I have to cease this sharp self afflicted pain,
With the only way I know best.
There is a saying that says,
Destroy Anything That Destroys You
So I did. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Distant African Nights

Those Distant African Nights...


1.


The shadows swayed in your candlelit room,

a cool breeze teasing your bare back,


streaks of lightning forked in the Johannesburg night,

as my hands stroked your hair,

kissing your soft mouth,

holding you,

ever so tight.



2.


You whispered that you loved me,

and I kept silent,


the rain fell, 
shadows danced,
thunder rolled,

the breeze teased your naked back,

you whispered that you loved me,
as my lips found yours,

the rain washed over our tender nights,


lightning and candlelight,

etching poems on your burnished skin,


yet,

a fear gnawed at me,

deep within.



3.


We parted ways,
and you could never forgive me, you said,


now, after numberless thunderstorms,

the rain that falls,


echo the countless tears that I have shed.



4.


You are long gone,

far away,

happy, I pray,


yet the memories persist,

those precious moments shall never, 
ever,

like the Jo'burg rains,
trickle away,

and I wish you well,
for loving me as you did,

for it was I who was not worthy,


then,


and it is I who is not worthy,


now...



5.


You were always true,


it was I who always,

always,

refused to,


to give myself,


completely to you.






Details | ABC | |

Coward

People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?
Why has this life become so meaningless,
that we just want to throw it away?
We become selfish and think our life is so bad,
dont think of others who's lives are worse, But still greatful for what they have.
People take for granted the things they've got,
clothes, food, smokes and shoes, even a roof or a bed,
They dont think of the homeless,
the hungry, not even the cold or the hot.
They just think they want to be dead,
Things happen in our lives that, to us, seem bad.
We dont look for help or trust any "friends"
All because of the past we've had.
Dont be a coward and run away,
Stick it out, Live life,
I know that there's alot of strife,
But stick it through day to day.
People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?....


Details | Free verse | |

The Hardest Part

I'm very glad to hold your waist against mine;
smelling your perfume, and feeling your warmth.

Our heartbeats though, are becoming slower and colder;
you are moving out to another place, because of a better job;
I swear it, I'm really happy for you.

I just wish that God would somehow pause time a little bit,
to give us time to kiss, celebrate life, laugh, and play around
in the open fields.

I will miss your pancakes, smile, voice, sweet heart.......everything
about you.

The hardest part for me right now, is to tell you "goodbye"......


Details | Rhyme | |

Peace be with you little ones

Peace be with you little ones,
As you make your journey home,
So early in the day it seems,
To come upon your lives’ sweet gloam.

Peace be with you little ones,
Your smiles brightened up the earth,
And though we might no longer see,
They still in heaven spread their mirth.

Peace be with you little ones,
And those who would your guardians be,
There should be no cost put on lives,
So easily lost in tragedy.

Peace be with you little ones,
As you make your journey home,
So early in the day it seems,
To come upon your lives’ sweet gloam.

For the children and adults who lost their lives in Newtown Connecticut


Details | Rhyme | |

EYE Don't See -Part 2-

My eyes
Refuse to see tragedy
My eyes
Marinate in dread…unable to embrace ecstasy 

And I’m left in my solitude…
My eye’s sagging…from endless mourning  
And I’m close to my demise… 
Only to find myself disappear…
When will peace draw near?

You don’t see 
What damage you’ve done
Just let me be
Leave me alone…hand me a gun

I yearn for unspoiled glory
To make me feel perfect once more
I yearn for flawless serenity
To make me feel no regret…don’t ignore
My calls…don’t hang up on me

You don’t see 
What damage you’ve done
Just hear my plea
Listen to my excruciating cries…
Listen to the truth, not the malicious lies  
Our journey has just begun   

And I’m left in my solitude…
Do you hear me weeping?
And I’m close to my demise…
Only to find myself disappear…
When will peace draw near?

Eye can’t handle the stress
Let me release my horrendous distress
Eye can see you making that same mistake
At least MY life isn’t at stake

And I’m left in my solitude…
My eye’s weeping…do You feel my lament
And I’m close to my demise…
Only to find myself disappear…Stepped on like cement
I’m aching with discontent… I abhor this torment    
When will peace scrub off my fear?

I can’t believe my eyes
Your guiltiness flows into me…
I can’t believe I fell for your lies
Your heartless action rape my mind…you don’t see
What my EYES see…

You’ll never see 
How much pressure you put me under
Unchain me from this chamber
And watch me flee…

When will you be set free?


Details | ABC | |

Why don't we just avoid all this and live a happy life

Does this darkness have a name? 
  
Does this hatred and cruelty have no mercy? 
Why do we make fun of those who look ugly..... What is happening to us judging others by their clothes and looks.... Who are we to judge????? 
You think you have everything but you’ve got nothing if you kept judging others by their looks…... Have a heart for once... What are we doing..??? Have you ever asked yourself this question....??!! What am I doing..??!! We lost our humanity We are not humans anymore If we kept doing the same stupid (bullying) every day...??!! Don't call yourself human if you kept talking badly about others... Weak people are living in their own shadows We consumed all our breath creating the darkness for the weak people... Does this darkness have a name?! Is it your name ???? Is it my name ???? Is it humanity’s name ???? Someone answer me ..!!?? Why are we harassing others ????? 
Why don't we just avoid all this and live a happy life ?????


Details | ABC | |

I Can't Believe It's Really Over This Time

I really hate this feeling, sometimes I wish I could stop breathing. I don't wanna try, just leave me here to die. You were the thing that made my life living for, but your no longer mine anymore. I feel so much pain, sometimes I believe I'm going insane. I'm missing what we had, although it was bad. I'm always walking down memory lane, why can't you see my pain? I know people change, &&' things get strange. I guess I gotta face it, she's my new replacment. I can't believe it's really over this time, I feel as if i have commited a crime. I live in a world of sorrow, so I don't ever worry about tomorrow. I didn't even have time to cry, because i had already said bye. I feel like I'm digging a deeper whole, so I'm hoping Jesus will take control. I'm sorry for my dumb mistake, but baby now I'm wide awake.


Details | Lyric | |

My Inamorata

Regretful I am; 
Anguish I am to you-
Wipe those tears away, 
Precious are they.

Adorn this pulchritudinous life, 
Smile like always.
You was held dear and the most cherished, 
Heart and soul I say will you be reminiscent.

Let me wander like I do, 
let go cause wonted I am;
In vagabondage I live, 
Go live your life in serenity.

Ne'er look back, 
No longer can i see you distressed;
Pain I am for you, 
Au revoir, my inamorata.

(For Judy)


Details | Lyric | |

Thought It Was Right

 It's a funny thing  we have in this relationship we call love ,
I know this one thing for sure and  that it was not from above.
   Struggle as we may day after day week after week,
Doesn't seem to matter we can never reach what we seek.
    In my heart I know what  I have felt for most my life,
Forever it seems I have wanted you to be my loving wife.
    But there's always been this small wedge between  you and I,
You just were unable to stop yourself from telling me lies.
     Oh there were days that were so good and felt so right ,
It always changed before we had ever reached the night .
     A very sad thing to see hop[es and dreams fade away,
Nothing left but to remember those wonderful  days .
     Still I believe in relationships that are filled with love,
The ones that are truly made by the hands from above.
       So much will be lost  and will never be recovered ,
But  there will be so much  more gained with a new lover.
       A far cry from what I had dreamed my life would be,
Yet I will continue on in search of a love meant just for me.
Tac


Details | Light Poetry | |

Rain Take My Tears

CRIED A FEW DROPS
WHEN I THOUGHT YOU BROKE MY HEART.
I CURSED MYSELF LIKE NO TOMORROW
BECAUSE PAIN MADE ME SO.

I'M AWAKE, NO MORE IN THE DREAMLAND
I FEEL THE BEAT AND EVERY PANG.
IT MAKES A FOOL OUT OF ME,
COZ IT'S HOW THINGS SUPPOSED TO BE.

I SHOULDN'T GO BEYOND
WHAT MY HEART CAN GIVE
AND SHOULD NOT EXPECT MORE THAN
WHAT I CAN RECEIVE.
IN THE END, ITS THE HEART THAT SUFFERS
NOR MAKE THE BRAIN ANY WISER.

BROKEN HEARTS MAY NOT BE REPAIRED
BUT IT CAN BE HEALED. IT IS MAY BE HARD
BUT IT IS POSSIBLE.


Details | ABC | |

Feeling Down

I'm feeling down, &&' I'm already on the ground. I cant get any lower, my patience is getting slower. I've already hit the floor, &&' I'm becoming sore. I'm not sure where I went wrong, but now I dont belong. I'm like the unknown, all alone. This feeling is unbarable, the pain is unbelievable. I'm ready to walk out the door, I can't take no more. This is why I don't trust, I always get pushed in the dust. Now I got to cover my eyes, &&' ignore all your lies. I've been left in the rain, I've felt the pain. I knew things were wrong, but I stayed along. Now I'm here all alone, waiting for the sound of my phone. I wouldn't wish for my worst enemy to feel this way, that's what I have to say. I didn't really have a choice, now I'm missing the sound of your voice. I made mistakes that wont fade, not even with a blade. My heart isn't bullet proof, &&' that's the truth.


Details | Free verse | |

Memories Made

The coldest white had fell
Surrounding all the feet of those behind
The day turned into hours
Just in the mind
Did the gift appear in night?
Or were dreams reality?
Did it come from karma’s hands?
It drifts from sanity

The trek towards that happy place
You’ve been there many times
Something was different now
It held a horrible surprise
The box wasn’t full of life and sound
The ashes of memories made were here
Taking longer to twist the knife
Left remains of a child now in tears

Standing still you couldn’t breath
Excuses flying in your mind
Trying to figure out the scene
Hoping there’s time
You look up to see
Expectant eyes for the last time
You wish you could keep
But it’s the saddest of a smile 


Details | Free verse | |

Reflections of Love

I need to heal and fast,
I can feel the time running out, all too soon.
But can't push myself out of the agony,
The threads of pain pull me back like a puppet.
 
I seem wrong to be grieving now, odd one!
Everybody else is no longer black,
Me, haven’t seen the sunlight for long;
The mansion, its corridors, the rooms  now my world.
 
The wound in my heart is still too fresh,
It forbids me from a sunset on the beach,
It forbids me from running or skipping,
It forbids me from laughter and joy...
 
In denial: they say but it's not all true, I accept
I know he is dead, He is no more
But do I dump him in my past and move on?
The thought makes me hate myself!
 
He would want you to smile again, live further..
Strangers tell me his likes and wants, the know-it-alls.
I look straight ahead and avoid their prying eyes
It’s a losing battle, I know but let me lose in grace...
 
Visitors keep pouring in, with flowers and tears.
He was a man loved by many, the crowd proves it,
Everybody seems shocked and pale but not as lost as me
I glide along the windows, reliving the shadow of memories...
 
The moments were many, uncountable even,
It crushes my soul to think, they are all I have,
I see his fingerprints on the window panes,
I search for mine too, just beside him they lay...
 
The garden is being watered, but by a strange hand
The plants understand the master is now below them, 
He will never enjoy their colors or drive away moths
His ashes and scent scattered around the mango tree..
 
I smile at the garden then burst out laughing,
Before I know, warm tears run down my nose
But there still lingers a smile, wet with glistening tears
I am happy he lived, he lived full and more...


Details | Free verse | |

Visible Breath

Autumn comes I stand watching the leaves..thinking
The breath leaves my body unseen
But as the mercury drops and as I ponder my place.
I notice all I think all I feel.
Right there on the window before me.
To others it's just a mist caused by cooling or heating or both.
A chilhood whimsical game"oh boy look it's cold"
To me that mist is all, your name , your face, Our time.
I want to wipe it away this physical aberation of all unseen in my heart.
I see it all the pain the love the heartache everything in a small whitish cloud on a simple window.
My hand reaches pauses  oh so this is what you look like.
Oh if it was so easy to be done.
The mist fades rapidly with every lonely wasted breath. Making an apperance oh so briefly.
What ever course I take to wipe away or to gently touch the mist.
Would this breath on the window which taunts me so relay back to my damaged soul see its gone you'll be ok now or see how it welcomes your touch?
welcome to the world for all to see.
Hidden by the sun most of the time.
My fingers glide through the vanishing mist, I flash back to your cheek beneath my fingers.
Goodbye my love, goodbye my pain, goodbye to the only proof I have left of you.
But at peace I am.
I know now what I did not before.
Your not invisable your their in my breath.
Kissing the crisp Autumn air with me.
And all I have to do is breath.
And my visible breath will show me all I feel is real as real as the mist on the window


Details | Rhyme | |

bloody red roses part 2

     She lies in a pile of bloody red roses

She left a note to her folks  saying

" I cant go on im sorry"

      It didnt say why

But still we cry

      We are all very sad

some of us are mad

       none of us are glad

She'll b greatly missed

        To me she was like a sis

But when will the rumors stop

        Noone knows the truth not even the cops

My pain is great 

       I wish we hadnt been late

But when we got there 

        there she lay 

on her already made bed of

Bloody red roses


Details | Rhyme | |

Just Go

You have to go
Just go
So I can let go

I’ve hugged you hard
Despite your guard
I’ve parked my sorrows
But wiped your tears
I’ve fallen right down to the ground
Yet offered to always hold your hand

For you I always did stand

You kept me near
But stayed far and clear
You brought me confusion
I held onto our illusion
You let me down
But your faith was my crown

Now it’s too late
Years of hard work washed by lies
See the quirk of fate
I miss you, sure I do
But you miss me more
I just can’t be there for you
Anymore

Can’t we meet half way?
No damn it
We can’t
You couldn’t even go a step with me
Now I choose to walk away

I will leave you 
I have no choice
I will forget you
Because I have to
I will forgive you
To start brand new

You have to go
Just go
So I can let go 



Details | I do not know? | |

boungiorno

hello! hey! boungiorno! what is the date?/
this world of dimensions created duality/
no letters/ no words/ are enough to express/
someone like you/ in reality/

i filled all your emptines/ MY still quiet bay/
as Jhon opened world in his Yoko/
you searched perfect princes/ looked for "right him"/
now at only one overman looking/

i swear/ i will hold you/ as much as i can/
would become all the axes/ and outer space/
voice is speared by the screaming wind/
falling down/ flakes to your place/

going crazy just seeing your knees/
don't regret anything/ my Benito/
unbelievable/ perfect/ unbearable/
you whisper/ "la comedia e finita"//


Details | Light Poetry | |

Only Yesterday

 Seems like only yesterday I saw your face
 If only I knew
 I would take you in my arms
 Tell you I love you
 Over & over I cry
 It's sad & It's true
 And It's sad that It's true
 I will grieve for you
 In between my heavy breaths
 Picture you & our moments spent
 From my heart to yours
 I will truly miss.............YOU


Details | Ballad | |

Jock

Jock.

Now Jock he was a friend of mine
In those good old army days
When teenage boys were herded in
And made to change their ways
He told me one fine summer’s day
With a big blue sky above
"I'm glad that I'm a soldier boy
This army life I love".

They shipped him off to good old Nam
Placed a rifle in his hands
And said "now you're a soldier boy
I hope you'll understand
We're fighting those old Vietcong
You've got to see us right
You don't know what it's all about!!!
Nor us, just go and fight"

Poor Jock ain't with us any more
God bless his poor old mum
Our lad he was a forward scout
No use his bloody gun
As the flying metal put him down
Our jock the hero died
As politicians wined and dined
So many tears were cried.


Details | Romanticism | |

Locked In And Set

What happens when two are destined to drift 
Slowly forever apart?

They'll tell each other of crossing paths again
One day, that this is just a new start!

Time marches on though
While these two meet many others...

But to their first true love
They won't ever forget...

Because their hearts, for each other
Have been Locked In And Set


Details | Bio | |

Anger

Dark Roiling Rage,
like the waters of the Indian ocean in a 
silver flecked storm.
Uncontrollable tears take hold 
and not meant for others to see.
Hate, Love, Betrayal.
Emotions that one can't feel 
if they never existed in the first place.
Being emotionless in a fight is the way I'll survive.
Love fading,
skin turning grey,
is it to late?
my time has been long up.
I know no other way to live.
while I am emotionless,
 I'll never have to endure the cruel tormenting taunts, or
the abuse, or the betrayal.


Details | Blank verse | |

As I Die

As ye watch me die,
Refuse thy urge to cry.
As ye see me leave,
Refuse thy need to grieve.
As ye observe my spirit,
Refuse thy desire to quit.
As ye see me ascend,
Refuse thy life’s own end.


Details | I do not know? | |

Port of Call

Port of Call


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

with the breath of the ocean a caressing balm,
soothing pained memories away,
to the swaying of a solitary palm.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

feeling the brushing away of all past turmoil,
on a quest for solace, ever so hard to find,
yet comforted by the crashing of the waves,
as the tide cleanses all pain,
and leaves despair far, far behind.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

drenched in a sea-breeze of mist,
that hushes the ache of bygone moons,
tasting the salty tang on my lips,
as the burnished sun,
over the distant horizon,
swoons,

and dips.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

searching, ever searching,
for a slice of solitude,
as memory bids a final adieu,
reaching under the sea so vast,
and seeking comfort in the depths,
while embracing,
the tomorrows to come,
wishing that they be true.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

seeing my truths drown,
as they slip beneath the turquoise waters,

feeling my heart ablaze,
with a passion that rarely falters.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

yet knowing that I am home at long last,
wishing the waves would wash away,
the defences that once stood,
like an impregnable wall.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

I have found, at long last,

my final port of call.


Details | Free verse | |

Summer School

One year I went to a summer school. 
And there was a girl there 
With shining eyes and
An award winning smile. 
She was kind to everyone and 
Excluded no one. 
She always laughed with others
But you could go to her when you 
needed it.
We talked for hours and
Quickly became friends. 

Last year I went back to summer school. 
The girl was still there. 
She had sad eyes but
Kept the award winning smile. 
She was kind to everyone yet
Excluded herself. 
She never laughed properly 
But you could always go to her 
when you needed it. 
We talked for mere minutes and
I guess I lost a friend. 

This year when I went to summer 
school
The girl was no longer there.
Rumours of suicide surrounded
Her name
And no one was kind to us all.
Everyone excluded their-selves.
Silence consumed every thought and moment
Because no one was there when we 
truly needed it. 
Memories of talking haunted me and
I couldn't help but miss my friend.


Details | I do not know? | |

Demolished

I’ve never hit rock bottom so hard.
I got up but it feels like I’m still sitting down.
I’ve never felt pain so bad
To the point where I just can’t function.
The memories I can’t seem to erase
They replay in my head constantly until I’m in tears.
I’ve never had my heart broken so bad
That just picking up the pieces crumbles in my hands.
I’ve never felt so alone.
That even while you hold me
I can’t feel your arms.
I’ve never been so depressed in my life
That even a psychiatrist don’t know my diagnosis.
There is only one way to go but up.
But my ladder keeps sliding down.
I run, jump, skip, hop.
Defeat lays on my breastplate.  


12/23/12


Details | Lyric | |

This is Goodbye

Somebody told me that you’re happy
That you’re moving right along
That you’re planning for the future
But I think they’ve got it wrong.
You’ve got everyone thinking
That you’re smitten and in love
They think you’ve gotten really lucky
Have everything that you’ve dreamed of…

But I know better, don’t I?
I can see it in your eyes
I see your halfhearted smiles,
I could spot them for miles
And I can sense the subtle lies
I know you better than the rest do
But I can’t save you, I can’t rescue -
You from your own disguise
So I guess this is goodbye now
Goodbye now
Good…bye

I heard she’s fond of metal’s sharpness
That she’s carving both your ways
But she’s cut more than herself
She cut you and everyone else
Who cared about you at one time
And you just let her do it
Let her twist her grips inside
So I guess you’re guilty too
You can’t hide the ugly truth
So I guess this is goodbye

So tell your lies

But I know better, don’t I?
I can see it in your eyes
I see your halfhearted smiles,
I could spot them for miles
And I can sense the subtle lies
I know you better than the rest do
But I can’t save you, I can’t rescue -
You from your own disguise
So I guess this is goodbye now

I guess this is goodbye now
Good…bye


Details | Free verse | |

Deceased

Middle of the night
All that is heard
Is yelling & screaming
A voice says,
"...No!...
...Why?!...
...Stop!...
...Don't do that!..."
Then nothing
Walk into the room
Nothing to see
Pitch black
One click of the light switch
All is revealed
Empty liquor bottles
Broken glass
Pills
Knife on the floor
Blood splattered all over the walls
With writing on it that reads,
"See what you made me do?"
Look on the floor
A dead body holding a gun
Look on the ceiling
A dead body hanging
What a nightmare
But a wish come true
Both parents
Dead


Details | I do not know? | |

For Bob Dylan

Ramblin' Bob Dylan Blues
(For Bob Dylan)



Why does the sun dry up so many scattered tears

slipping down the coarse cheek of a million hushed fears

where no one is scalded though the searing fog clears

while prayers are mutely spoken even as the end nears

We shatter and scrape on demented knees

Blindly begging for mercy as it silently flees

Searching listlessly for salvation drowned in the breeze

That spits at the soft rose suffocated by a wheeze


I know now what I need never have known

Of hope that was trampled before it had flown

Into a wasted sky filled with hate that could drown

The giggling of the crowd and the crying of the clown


A hope so fragile that its wings were of brittle glass

Ripping the veneer off the sewers of class

Twisting the fabric of the weighed and costed mass

Who numbly waited hoping that it too may pass


For when shards of that hope in all hearts scurries away

To a darkness where crowded night is emptied off the heaving tray

'Tis then when sewn eyes shall behold that doleful day

When all shall tear at each other while on demented knees we still shall pray


For a lifting of the veil of that wilful deceit

That's wrapped up in a flag swollen with conceit

While the limbs splinter in the claw of a winner's defeat

Yet still the drums roll for the ill-fated souls chose never to retreat


From that drenched battle-ground where blood flows through a sieve

And love's lost song plaintively begs for a reprieve

From eternal loss which into raw emotion does cleave

Only to slip through the fingers and like grains of sand, leave.


Details | Rhyme | |

Time Travel

What became of all the years?
The love, the fear, the joy, the tears.
The games we played right on the street,
An ice cream cone our biggest treat.
And all the people who I knew,
Are now just down to but a few.


Details | I do not know? | |

Abuse

Trapped. No where to hide.You scream at me through the door.Though your words still 
sting me.
I sit on the ground alone.Blood drips down like tears. tears run down like rain.The room's 
spinning.  My heart bursts out of my clothes.We got into a fight.  Why is unclear.
I tried to leave.  You hit me. I fell.I started to cry.  You kicked me.A sharp pain burst out of 
my chest.  I could not breath. I have little energy,I kicked you.  You fell. I ran to our 
bedroom.
I am trapped.  No where to hide.I'm weak. I stumble to your Night stand.I see a gun.You 
break down the door.  I grab the gun.You start to choke me, squeezing my throat like you 
were trying to get some sort of juice out of me.
I pull the trigger.
BANG!Trapped.  No where to hide.Your grip feels looser.   Your face in pain.
You fall down. i fall into darkness.Free.  No need to hide.


Details | Free verse | |

Eric -RIP-

Why did you leave?
Oh companion of mine
Why did you leave?
Twas it really your time? 
Did you see no point in staying 
another measly day? 
By my side if you were oh the 
things I would say! 
Judge you, I would not
Tis not in my nature
The emptiness I feel from your 
passing measures to that of a 
crater
A bullet took your life
One blast and it's through
What pains me to know is the 
gun was held by you
All you left behind was a note 
for family and friends
Inscribed were many ' I love 
you's ' 
And your deep heartfelt 
amends
No need to say sorry
For you lived a full life
I shall always remember this 
through the pain, struggles, 
and strife
'You don't know what you got 
until what you got is no more'
Oh how this saying is true!
As the tears stream my face 
and I reminisce of you
With anger in our eyes and 
pain in our hearts
We lay you to rest
Hoping that solace will 
overflow in our lives
We miss you Eric 
This is in plain black and white
Had we the power we'd wish 
you back to life
I take comfort in knowing one 
day we'll meet again
Beyond the pearly gates 
reunited  as friends
This is NOT goodbye
Only a brief farewell
When shall we meet again?
Only time will tell


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye was the last thing I'd do You were taken from our lives far too soon My world has changed now that I don't have you Your eyes shone like stars, your smile the moon Your voice was like music straight from Heaven You taught me how to play Monopoly And the piano when I was seven We danced around the room and sang loudly We laughed so hard that we would almost cry We were just kids, so happy and care free Then you were gone and I didn't know why I couldn't understand how it could be Tears fell from my eyes as they carried you And saying goodbye was all I could do


Details | Rhyme | |

leavin you behind

im goin on with my life
and leavin you behind
i love you still
but i will not go crawling back
you gave me alot of love
but also heartache and sorrow
maybe itll b better tomorrow
you hurt me bad
and it used to make me sad
and then it changed
i got mad
youll always be my first love
you used to be really special
and finally im goin on with my life without you
and leavin you behind


Details | I do not know? | |

Character

Your character deceives me
Always misleads me
One minute I’m your friend
The next minute I’m your foe
The thought of you
Makes my liver quiver
My heart shivers.
You were my confidant
Now I’m your adversary
We had a good friendship
Now you’re not even worth, being an associate
I wanna say goodbye…but I can’t
I’ll never forget you
The gleeful person you were
And the impudent creature you have become.
08/15/05


Details | Free verse | |

How Do I Let You Go

What will be
Will be!
I know of this, first hand
Your life was taken away
So abruptly!
I will 
Never forget
That day!
Till the day 
My body dies
And
I am with you, again!

“How was I to prepare myself?”
With 
That kind of 
Life changing, event!
You 
Didn't warn me 
You
Were permanently leaving!
I hope 
You know 
How much “I love you”
Know
You will never be forgotten!

I don’t know 
What 
Has got into me!
Consciously
I feel you
Inside me
I see images
Of your face 
So clearly!
Am I crazy 
To believe in this, my love?

“Are you still with me?”
“Is my imagination 
Playing cruel tricks
Running rampant
As
I talk with you
As if 
You were by my side, right now

In my heart and mind
Your face etched
Imprinted
Like a blue print
That never fades
Your foot prints 
Still remain, beside me
My heart beats
Eternally
Trying to make sense of everything!

Forgive me, my love
For being so strong in my feeling
For it has been a long time
Since I lost you, my friend
Something 
I haven’t
Quite
Got over!

My heart 
Having 
A mind of its own
Aching 
To be with you, still!
To see you
To smell you
To touch you
To taste you
One
Last time!

I want to say “Goodbye” 
Once and for all!
As 
We have
Brought out
The best and worst 
In each other
Rivers run deep
When it comes to you and me!

We have had our fair share of fights and arguments
Stubborn disagreements
All of them
Meaningless
Now
You cease to exist!

I miss your lingering touches
Your hand, stroking my face
Your big, blue eyes
Looking into mine
Your warm lips
Your rough, unshaven face 
The way you
Passionately
Kiss me
While
We make love, till dawn

I miss
All those nights
You kept me 
Safe and warm!
I miss
Your
Loving embrace
I miss
Your
Reassurance!
“Am I ever going to feel the same, with another?”
Just
As 
I felt
In your arms, my love?

How
Do I let you go?
How
Do I set myself, free?
I am ready
To love, again!
With 
‘Our eternal love’
Supporting
And 
Guiding me
Especially
In times, like these!


Details | ABC | |

Time Bomb

They think they understand,
they think they know the pain.
They try to guilt me into
doing what they say.

I am not scared to leave,
I am scared to stay.
The pain in my chest,
will never go away.

I am alone
in this cold, dark world.
No one to live for-
no one to die with.

My life is a time-bomb,
I am destined to explode.
The clock’s ticking on,
I have nothing to live for.


Details | I do not know? | |

Your heart

what does your heart say?
can you hear it?
feel it?
when you push it aside do you feel regret?
longing?
or do you feel nothing?


Details | Free verse | |

Less Than A Day

The touch of your whispers has blown through the air
And the wave of summer disappears in the sand
There’s nothing to stop these memories are gone
Let the playbook now rest for the feelings they’ve stopped
Slowly it turns the small hands on your wrist
The knots in your belly have clenched like a fist
You picture the east and close her eyes
For the dawn’s a coming in all of our lives
The night’s now bleeding forever it tilts
Circling the orbit no rest from the filth
Rivers are flowing and spirits are dim
And the skies from the ocean will always stand still
The pain from the east has moved to the west
These days are numbered just like the rest
Blind in the rivers the hand clears it away
The whole world has changed in less than a day


Details | Free verse | |

True Reality

Why is it
I am always wrong?
Something
I have always done?
Why is it
I am 
Never good enough
In your eyes
In challenging times?

How many times
Do I have to say
“I love You?”
What will it take
To convince
That mind 
And 
Heart 
Of yours?

What can I say
That will ease 
This jealousy
And 
Resentment
You feel towards me
When drinking 
Too much booze
Killing what brain cells
Are left
In that stubborn 
Head of yours!

How long 
Will it take
For you 
To believe in me?
For I know
I am a fool 
Staying here, with you!
Feeling desperate
Lost and lonely
Dreams squashed
Emotionally drained
When ‘we’ need to pull together
In union ship
To make 
This bond strong
Between us!

'Uniting as One’'

'Love Conquering All'

“Well!”
“So, I am told!”

I love you more
Than this
Arguing and fighting!
But 
You refuse to understand
The love I have for you

My head 
Tells me to stay with you
But
My heart knows
I cannot!
For
I have asked you 
To be kind to me
I have asked
You to open up 

Your anger and rage
Continues growing
Out of control
Taking over
Like
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde 
Burning bridges
Being ruthless
Always
Out for the kill!

I need to break away!
I need to clear my head!
I need to experience
Love and longevity
True togetherness
With 
The one’s I love!
My heart needs to experience
‘Healthy Love’
My heart deserves the best!
You now
Belong in my past
I am no longer the person
You once knew me, to be

Your insecurities
Your inner demons 
Far bigger
Than any of the love
You choose to acknowledge 
Or 
Feel from me!

You can believe this 
To be true
If nothing else!

“Love thy self”

Share
Without personal gain
Being 
Your Primary Motive!
Know Love 
Be Love, in Action!

Be honest
Have empathy now
As
I cut these cords
Of emotional bondage
That 
Bind us together 
True Love 
No longer 
Our foundation!

I stand on my own
Knowing
I have learnt the lessons
You have come to teach
I now know
What love isn't!
“I thank you”
For showing me this!

My illusions of love
Blinding me
Colouring my experiences
Revealing
Only what 
'I Wanted Us To Be'
Not
‘True Reality’


Details | Free verse | |

Seeded Pain

This is far more greater a pain that was ever needed ,
The damage done long ago when it was seeded.
    This hurt you planted deep within me ,
Has grown to a  size that just shouldnt be .
     Disrespect and neglect it means nothing to you,
For it is something you just will always do.
     Love doesn't hurt like this it never  could ,
The words mean nothing to you but they should .
    Compassion and understanding is what love takes ,
If you want to live a love without heartbreaks.
    Talking and listening go hand in hand ,
To love in this life as a woman and a man.
     Im so devistated by the events of these days ,
Not able to to get you to ever  change your ways.
     How can I convince you that it is all a mistake,
And the pain and hurt  I can no longer take .
     Makes me never  wanting to awaken again,
No matter  even if it's  Gods  greatest sins .
TAC 


Details | Rhyme | |

Suicide Is Not the Answer


Lately, I have noticed a very disturbing trend.
Many people wish for their life to end!

There are many circumstances
that bring this about.
Many feel "trapped in," and think
"there's no way out!"

I admit,...  I have been very
discouraging thoughts.
Sometimes, wondering, if I was dealt
"the wrong lot."

But just when I feel alone
and trapped within.
I think about Jesus! He's always
been my friend!

I've called to him more than a time or two...
When I didn't know
"what I was going to d."

When, to him, I cried out and pleaded...
He's given to me the hope
and direction I needed!

I recommend this same Jesus
to your life today!
Whatever your problem...
He has made a way!

An abundant assurance
Is what Jesusbrings!
He is an awesome God!
And can take care of everything!

Your problems are never too big
or small for him to take control.
He can bring healing to you!
And make your body whole!

He is what's needed! In this lost
and dying generation!
Won't you accept his mercy
and salvation???

By Jim Pemberton   2012





Details | Rhyme | |

A-Heart-Broken

Tears of blood is dripping down form my eyes.
My heart feels like a stampede of horse has just
ran over it a hundred times.
It feels so lifeless and weak.
We used to be one.
Now we are none.
Our love was strong.
We can fall off a plane and never hit rock 
bottom. 
A boat can sink, but we would not drown. 
I cannot figure out what I did wrong. 
I feel like a lyric of a love song.
This feeling inside of me,
is this how the rest of my life would be.
I feel so abused.
I feel so used.
I feel like someone just threw hot acid all 
over my body.
Though my love for you will never change,
I know that you hear has been rearranged.
I am still crying because I 
accepted being heart broken
by the one and only that mistaken.
My eyes are now ‘awaken.’


Details | Free verse | |

Rained Filled Clouds

Rain filled clouds are what follow me now ,
No sunshine for me these days and smiles are not aloud.
My sight is blurry now and can't listen to what you say,
It was you who has caused this and why I am feeling this way.
Hold on tightly now It has been the ride of my life ,
But somehow it slipped away like a thief in the night .
How did I not see it so plainly writen on the wall,
Never in a million years did I expect to lose it all.
But here I am standing with my back  turned away,
For I can not face the sadness you brought me this day.
Why has this happened to me and just what will I do,
Shell of a man in a life that was suppose to be spent with you.
It's over now and it's all becuase of you 
I just cant see  theres anything you can do .
 Blinded by the love  for you never a  reason to doubt,
So quickly I learned howI will be going without.
 The warmth of a love you brought to me ,
 Now I will live without what was meant to be .
You were always a a part of the world I've grown to know,
Now that your gone the sadnees in my face will forever show.
These cloudy days bring me nothing but pain,
My life forever will be only me standing in the rain.
TAC


Details | Prose | |

Somber Parting

There are so many people I miss, especially my wife, and the very exciting things we used to do together. Sometimes I am sorrowfully speechless at the thought of them, and often drowning in a pool of private tears over the loss of my one true love. She looks past me as if to see through me as anything and everything deserves her attention more than I do. However hard I try to pretend it isn't there, a gnawing heartache lingers through the day from the hours of crushing melancholy in the night, seeping into the tone of my voice, fading the vivid colors of the world to a drabby gray. Even in laughter, I have to fight the dark clouds that threaten to cast a shadow in my expressions. Can't pull a rabbit out of the hat anymore. No more escape tricks. I am, fresh out of hope, physically exhausted, emotionally defeated to my core. It is a very lonely place where all the doors have been shut and bolted from the outside, and the four baren dingy walls that fill my vision in the dimming landscape of life are a stinging reminder of my failures as a father and the inability to measure up as a good husband. That hour is here, I knew it would come. I'm off, to a better place. Goodbye.


Details | Rhyme | |

Moving On

I've been knocked to the ground, I'm as low as can be
The thoughts that run through my mind are why oh why, and woe is me
It seems I've been here before, and I can see clearer
The reasons are the same and the heartache comes nearer
Though I'm broken and hurt and as sad as can be
The only way to feel better is to create a new me
So this time I must build a thicker wall,
And pick up the pieces of my broken heart
The past is the past, and I can't let it follow
Though I still feel the pain, I can't go on in sorrow
I wish I had been enough, that I was worth more effort,
But now I know, I can't chase air forever
I wish I could say I don't care anymore,
But the truth is my darling, that's why it hurts more.
But it's obvious from all of the struggles we've had
As hard as I try, this will just end up sad. 
I wish you the best, really I do
And there will always be a place in my heart reserved for you
I will smile and laugh and rise above,
And then one day I hope, I can again find love.
So Lord give me strength as I go through this trial,
I am ready to accept things and be no longer in denial.
Thank you my dear, for times I can't forget
And for that time in my life, you really were the best.
People will love you, then hurt you and leave,
But the test is how we endure and grieve.
My path is uncertain, and it scares me to death,
But I will move forward and try to live with each breath.
Remember me please, when you think of the past,
And I will try to remember, that some good things, just aren't meant to last


Details | I do not know? | |

Raging

You were a lesson to be learned 
And I was the one who got burned,
I guess when it's the end it's the f******g end.

So I hope you choke on the words you screamed
Out, cursing my name when I didn't let you go
'Cause it turns out my Love was wasted on you.

I'm trying not to hate but it's so damn hard
When everything we had meant nothing to you
But it was everything to me.

My eyes burn from all the tears that leak out
From time to time, my heart breaks just a little
When I remember how you walked away.

Some day I'll find someone better,
Someone who knows what they have and
Doesn't take advantage of my Love like you did.

Someone who won't try to use me,
Who will Love me for who I am and doesn't
Talk behind my back about things that aren't even true.

Maybe it wasn't meant to be, maybe I was 
Kidding myself, wanting to believe you Loved me,
But whatever it was, I hope you know, you're dead to me now.

Revenge is the sweetest dish ever concocted,
And maybe it's not right but it sure feels
Damn amazing, more than you made me feel. 

So this is the last time I go through this,
It's time to live my life without your ghost
Haunting me all the time, without the memories.

I'm better off without you, it's true,
Even if you were all I ever wanted, thought I needed,
It wouldn't have worked, no matter how we tried.

Don't say you Loved me, you wouldn't
Have walked away so damn easily if you had,
Wouldn't have left me with all this anger and pain.

Sad thing is though, I know when I wake up in the morning
And fall asleep at night, your sleeping image in the morning sun
Will come to mind, arms wrapped tight around me.

And I can't seem to shake this sadness,
Although my dreams aren't filled with you anymore,
But sometimes I swear I can still feel you, here, holding me, and I cry.

I remember how you would whisper
Sweet and low in my ear, that you loved me,
You'd never let me go, you'd always be here, but those were lies.

As I lied to you about letting you go if asked,
But then you countered with another lie, that you'd
Never ask, but here we are, in this chasm of dark goodbyes.

You turned your back when I needed you most,
You couldn't even act like a man when you left, just
Gave me a message saying it was over and went back to her.

I think that was the worst, that you ended it so
Suddenly, so easily, and went crawling back to the girl
You broke up with for me, but I suppose that's how it goes...


Details | Free verse | |

Blue Sky

Blue sky,
we thought everything was fine
but in truth,
nothing was.
It was a story,
a small story that will never return.
Breaking your world slowly
into tiny pieces.
Can't seem to see tomorrow 
through this black haze.
Helpless
crumbling
as the days go by.
Ripped apart by the hand of love
with nothing left to do but look.
Blue sky.
(May 31st, 2012)


Details | Blank verse | |

Moiety

It truly is quite a conundrum
and day and night, I ponder it.
In my hands I hold the lifeless
rag-doll remnants of our friendship
and still, I can not bury it.
I long to fly freely forward
but some force holds me still.
The problem lies within, I espy.
While all else is sound and whole,
there is a small, jagged hollow
from which a vital piece was taken.
You have a moiety of my heart,
not given to you intentionally,
but so it is, nonetheless.
Please, I beg you, return it,
so I may flee this desolate land.
Bring back the moiety of my heart
that leaves me waiting and incomplete.


Details | Lyric | |

HO HOE DOWN Vassallo style

Weeeeel, It's friday night
And I got my fiddle 
Alfred's here 
And he starting to niggle
I said call the dance
And make those folks wiggle
Here at the Soup hoe down

He stood at the mike
And started talkin' silly
with a Do-se-do
Just like a Hillbilly
With an allemande left
Hypocrites to the right
Sashay now, well into the night

Then He called a promenade
With a roll away
Cause He never made a poem
That made Poem of the Day
With a see-saw-taw
And a circle to the line
Freddie slip the clutch
And said good-bye to the grind 

 





Details | Free verse | |

Bleeding Love

Bleeding Love
Curled in a ball
Not knowing what to do!
Knees against my chest
Cradling oneself

‘Soothing my soul’

Memories of you
Flooding my brain
Your words
Left as lingering whispers
Your smile
Imprinted, upon my mind's eye
High light of my day!
Electrifying my nervous system
Jump starting my heart
Punishing me
For loving you
‘Bleeding love’


Details | Free verse | |

So Many

So many people I love.
So many people I've lost.
So many hurt
So many gone.

Bye bye for now, at least that's what I'm told, but it doesn't hurt any less when the people you love you no longer can hold.
Taken away to a better place.
See you soon! 

So many people you've lost.
So many feelings inside.
Makes you wonder if it's okay to hide.
Just for a while. Away from sympathetic smiles. You'll be back soon. It'll be okay.

So many hurt.
Tongues don't know how to say the right things when their brain is pulled by so many strings.
Just go through the motions. You'll come back soon.

So many gone.
So many have left for that place and you're just here like 'see you soon, right?'
But you never know. 
Where did they go? Where will I go? 
But even still, so many here.

Maybe one day we'll see each other.
Hugs will be on the house.
Tears will stream, but different than before. 
It once was an ocean of tears vast and never ending, but maybe with someone to help hug it out, it'll turn into a ocean with an ending.

So many to love,
So many to lose,
So many to heal,
So many to say bye to.

It's never over, but this is life.
So many four letter words that cause strife.
But for right now, the strife is all we see and when we get better (and have those free hugs we were promised) we'll see the joy they truly bring. We'll dance again, even sing. Maybe we'll be happy and smile up to heaven and say 'see you soon'.


Details | ABC | |

Where was his helmet

Into the midnight cold he rides; 
a chance travel, on the wild side; 
this is the vision, that always repeats, 
whenever I think about that curvy Rockford Street. 
Alone he travels on his way home, 
until a mystery sends him flying into the air, 
and has him crashing into the ground far from the road. 
Where was his helmet? O’ where was his helmet? 
In pain he lays all alone, 
until two-friends rush to his aid, 
and frantically made emergency calls from his phone; 
paramedics arrive and relieve his friends, 
as his journey into the unknown slowly begins. 
Where was his helmet? O’ where was his helmet? 
Now in a hospital lying on a bed, 
with nothing but sheer pain streaking through his head, 
mom rushes into the hospital with one of her sons by her side, 
the other son was in Iraq unaware awaiting R&R and waiting on his airplane ride; 
a devastated mother and a saddened brother both watched as the youngest sighed, 
eyes watery with tears as they watched him slip into the cold night. 
Where was his helmet? O’ where was his helmet? 
I received the terrible news while I was in Ballad waiting for a good plane, 
instead I was rushed to an awful flight and my heart felt immense pain; 
I begged and I pleaded with God, 
Please O’ please let this plane crash and let everyone but me live, 
I love my youngest brother take me O’ Lord, take me instead; 
he is too young God; he hasn't truly experienced life, 
my goodness he was only twenty-eight and never had his own family, nope not even a wife; 
by the time I made it to Rockford it was too late, 
my youngest brother was forever gone as a chance travel sealed his fate; 
tears in my eyes the pain still burns deep I must admit, 
with only one question in my mind; 
Where was his helmet? O’ where was his helmet?


Details | Rhyme | |

Broken

Why does it hurt so bad
It's starting to make me mad
Why does he have so much control
When that's not even his role

I ended up giving him my heart 
Even did just from the start
I don't see me getting the same
To think I wanted his last name

It's time to move on from this man
But I don't know if I can
I want to follow how I feel
But if it goes wrong I don't know if I can heal


Details | Rhyme | |

Adieu

Days are gone by
Months have passed by
Yet my love for you has not gone faded by

Those beautiful moments, we had together
And the silly arguments, we made with each other
Will always be treasured, though you are farther

My heart bleeds when I think-off
The day you walked off
My life and bid a final send-off

Day and night
Within I fight
For letting you go uptight

Though you are far-off
I wish you to be better-off
Cos you were once my better half


Details | ABC | |

How Do We Say Goodbye

How do we say goodbye to someone
We knew for so long
We feel the urge to visit places 
where they used to belong
We on things they used to do and say
No one not even me thought about this day
How do we say goodbye to someone
We grew up with though out the years
Someone who we shared many happy tears
How do we put it all together
How do we patch the holes in our hearts
How do we say goodbye
To our beloved one
To our ray of sun
Even though tears may run
We say In loving memory
Jacquelyn Gates goodbye for now


Details | Free verse | |

Almost Lovers

Almost Lovers
Now, loveless romantics
Loveless
With only sadness in our eyes
A fresh new hole 
In our hearts
Without each other
Being by each other’s side

I am trying not to think about you
Though images of you 
Still haunt me
Flooding, my mind
I hear the sound of your voice
Echo through the air
I see you ‘smile’
I can smell you, everywhere!

And when I watch the stars
Light up the sky at night
When I stroll the streets
Without you by my side
I watch lovers enjoy each other’s company
Reminiscing about ‘you’

Almost lover 
I still feel the beating of our two hearts
Becoming One
Even though you are gone
Goodbye, almost lover
Thank you for making my heart warm!


Details | Free verse | |

Your eyes across my soul

Its time to face the truth croons the singer on the radio and I die
Curling up in to a ball pulling my hair out and screaming
Because I know this to be true
I will be there again when it snows and snows
I will be there again if you call
I will be there again if you whisper out my name
In the eyes of my memories you're beautiful
In the breaths I stole with my camera you're beautiful
Across these lips that will never touch yours again you're beautiful

I thought I heard you call out my name tonight 
But I knew you weren't home
In the cold under the city lights beneath the blanket of night
What if it was you I think now as I linger
But you weren't home
And still... 
I wish I had turned around
To see you standing there in the gently falling snow
But I thought you weren't home

I have lost sleep tonight and I may never sleep again I fear
Because I don't know what to do
I don't know where to turn, where to go
So that I may, I might, 
Dream of your smile and your eyes across my soul
You're so beautiful, 

I let slip this pen from my fingers
Staining these last few lines I know it to be true
And I don't really care about that now
I will never be with you I know, I know... 

And this is the truth I must learn to face


Details | Free verse | |

Walk Away

Walk Away

Knock on the door
See who answers
Will you like
The face you see
Is it pain
Sad memories
Close the door
How do you feel
Lost and sad
Nowhere to go
Turn away
What does it mean
It means you are walking out on me.

By: Tim Lundmark


Details | Quatrain | |

Only Thirteen

The day it starts, leaving at 6 am
Walking to my car, everyday it begins
This windy morning, the rustling sound
I look and see a flyer appear on the ground

She was only thirteen,
Been missing a week
Brown hair and blue eyes
And freckled cheeks
Last seen on a night
When she went to the store
Last word was goodbye 
As she walked through the door

My heart in my mouth
She’s my daughter’s age
Gave feelings of sadness
A sense of rage
The thought of a baby
A lamb with the wolves
Sent shivers of fear,
Thoughts knowing, no good

She was only thirteen,
Been missing a week
Brown hair and blue eyes
And freckled cheeks
Last seen on a night
When she went to the store
Last word was goodbye 
As she walked through the door

My prayers for her family
And all of her friends
Good thoughts and kind wishes
Are all I can send
I’ll spend my day hoping
While doing daily tasks
That she will return safely
That is all that I ask

If there’s a Lord up in heaven
I believe, yes, there is
Then help this poor family
And grant me my wish
I pray that she’s fine now
Maybe just lost on the way
And hope she’s not taken
In a mere awful way

She was only thirteen,
Been missing a week
Brown hair and blue eyes
And freckled cheeks
Last seen on a night
When she went to the store
Last word was goodbye 
As she walked through the door

It’s been three whole months now
No sign of this girl
The parents’ only child
They lost their whole world
That poor missing girl
On the flyer on the ground
Just where did you go?
Why can’t you be found?


Details | Free verse | |

goodbye to those sad days

say goodbye to those sad days.
even though I have a troubled heart.
but yet,I still smile at you.
you gave me something to smile for.
for you I will be there by your side.
although I had to watch from the sidelines.
it made me wonder,am I apart of this 
world.
do I exist in this world.but you were there to
cheer me up.
when I look in your eyes I see the kindness
in your heart.

so I hum sweet a melody when you leave.
I smile everyday when I see you.
but I will say goodbye to those sad days.
and I will never go back again


Details | Rhyme | |

Her Pain

llooking up to the sky
 tears falling from her face
 never thought she would cry
 for someone who is such a discrase 
as she softly crys
 she learns to hate you 
and all of your lies are nothing new
 she knows you are gone 
she cant take it anymore 
what your doing is wrong 
she falls to the floor 
shes crying more than ever
 she feels like shes bleeding
 remember when you said never 
you were always missleading
 days turn to nights
 minuts turn to hours 
she started loosing sight 
of what you once called ours
 now she is broken
 and your the cause of her pain
 with all these words unspoken
 what could you possibly gain
 do you feel like a winner?
 do you feel like you won fist place?
 your just a siner
 it was never a race


Details | I do not know? | |

Saying Goodbye- Maybe For A Second

I never thought that 
I would be saying goodbye to you
But I’m tired of not being loved
I’m tired of my feelings not meaning anything
I need a man who’s going to care for me
I need a man who’s going to love me for me
I need a man who’s not going to just have sex with me
I loved you and to be honest I still do 
But do you love me is the question
If you love me…
And not second guessing your love for me 
Then maybe we can work something out 
I would love that 
Let me know if you love me
I don’t want to say goodbye forever


Details | Bio | |

Goodbye

Sometimes saying goodbye is hard, but I think it’s about time me to do it.
A year and 3 months, was it just a waste of time? I hope not.
When we first started talking everything was so good, the best relationship I’ve 
ever had.
Now I wish it could go back to the way it was, when I can see something in his 
eyes.
Goodbye? Is it about that time?
I hope not, because I love him.
Maybe he wants to say goodbye, and if he wants to he needs to let me know.
Goodbye after a year and 3 months?
Maybe it is about that time.
So goodbye my love!!!


Details | Free verse | |

Son Rise (from Scenes from Above)

Wave goodbye Tomorrow 
Die, drown another victim in yesterdays sorrow
This is goodbye tomorrow 
No tides to borrow 
So goodbye tomorrow 
Yesterday gone, tomorrow not shown 
Today just a repetition of a sinners definition 
My hopes shattered 
How do I cope with my tears and matter 
Drooling of fantasy's when you had her
A poor mans paradise 
Adversity and no cares about life 
Living in hell and loving it 
Pivoting through bail and shoving it 
Shoulder blades cracked, collar bones crumbled 
Older, outdated, fact is to remain humble
Cemetery lust 
Post marriage life and fussing is a must 
Burning eyelids 
Is there even a such thing as baby's dying of SIDDS 
Irresponsibility, parent-hood and no agility 
Rapper and murderer's 
Yall are cursed, so don't even refer to us 
I'm blessed with stress, my life's a mess 
But for me happiness is only a test 
And when you see that sudden glow in my eyes
And the room flow's with goodbyes 
It will all come as no surprise 
That as I pray for tomorrow
I'll be taken before sunrise 
And maybe I'll get to witness again his Son Rise


Details | I do not know? | |

I feel so..

I feel so lost in words and time.
My life is turning toward the ground.
Theres nothing to be found
That can grate that sound
Yelling and screaming as I watch it all fade away
My friend, my life, my soul
Everything changes so fast 
But nothing can be left in the past

Why must this last 
I can't get a grasp 
On the life that I want to have
I feel so lost in pain and suffering
Anger and the stuttering of my mind not knowing what to do

It’s out there to take me away for good
i can't stand being under this hood of darkness that leaves me restless
I'm ready to take the fall, into that cell to get away from you all.
My friends are gone. My life has been stawed upon.

I choked on the lips that kissed that bottle, of pain suffering.
The things that you said, that words that bled out of your mouth
Pushed that knife deeper into the wound. That hole you made that I can't fill
Because I don't have the pills. To ease the pain that will never go away.

My life was my high, my life was my pill.
But all you do is do what ever you can do you make me hate you!!!
Your bring it upon yourself, its all what you asked for.
I've gone through it, and now it’s your turn

Now as I lay here, I burn
In the anger, in the pain and suffering
That you brought upon me.
Everyone will know that you did it.
Everyone will know that I hated it.
It’s all in words that will never be told
Because this is my good bye tone
	
	Goodbye to the life that I lived so unhappily, but there was only one 
person that changed everything. And goodbye to you. Goodbye to my friends, my 
dreams, my writings. Goodbye to the ever changing worlds, Goodbye to the life’s 
of those that are happy. Goodbye to the Music that I loved. Goodbye to the 
mistakes I made and goodbye......


Details | Free verse | |

Simple Words

With simple words you said goodbye 
Simple words that said goodbye forever
Those simple words break my heart to pieces
Because I don't want goodbye to last forever
I want you to be my forever
I want you to be there for me today 
I want you to be there in my tomorrows
Be there like you were in my yesterdays
Don't abandon me when I need you
You're supposed to bring happiness into my life
But how can you do that when you leave
You lighted my darkest nights
But now you've caused the darkest night of all
You said you'd cherish me forever
That I would always be your one and only
But that was just a lie 
Every thing was a lie
I deserve better than you but I don't want anyone else
I want you and only you
So what do I tell those people 
The ones that said you'd break my heart
That you told you'd prove them wrong
They were right you did break my heart
And you don’t even have the decency to apologize
But they never expected you to stick around
Even though that was the only thing I asked you to do


Details | I do not know? | |

broken

At times I find myself lost and trapped within a daze,  confused, stuck, and idly 
consumed in lost days.  

Dwelling on the past while sitting idly gasped, peering around I'm blinded but 
can hear the masses laugh.   

So I smile to myself, take a breath, and exhale, my vision becomes more clear 
and my heart less frail.

I'm on a mission to succeed, who knows where I'll be, but I swear I'll  scale this 
whole mountain inevitably. 

There will be no more closing my eyes and dreaming of you,  I'm sick to my 
stomach already queasy from the view.  

Goodbye to the love we made and the promises you broke,  goodbye to the ones 
I returned which I now revoke. 

Goodbye to that person i though that I knew,  goodbye to that person that I 
thought was you.


Details | Free verse | |

My Loving Hate

My loving hate,
says goodbye god,
I know longer love life,
and I've never loved you,
I seek refuge in hell,
only to say I'm sorry,
it's the only reason i'm praying,
for the first time in years,
I say a finale farewell,
to my dearest enamy,
my loving hate,
I wish you farewell,
I hate to see you happy,
but you never cared about me,
so I'm leaving you now,
goodbye god,
I hate you with all my heart,
though I feel unsure,
I hope hell is okay,
I'm sleeping there at night,
i'm leaving now,
I'm out of heaven's sight,
so goodbye god,
my love,
my hate,
the girl you used to hate is dead,
only I now remain,
so goodbye,
and hope I rot in peace.