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Ode Funny Poems | Ode Poems About Funny

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Details | Ode | |

Enough Already, Ode to a Turkey

Oh how I love thee with your white and dark meat
Thou art the very best
But because of you, I can’t see my feet
My navel is two feet from my chest
To diet and lose so I don’t wobble no more
I would be very willing
It would be impossible now, because somehow
I finished four bowls of filling
My wife pointed at me and said look at him
He sits at the table, like a dog he begs
I stare at you and your magnificent breast
Can hardly wait to get my hands on your legs
Enough already, I’m on my knees
Give me some stuffing and some black eyed peas
Sweet potatoes, corn and a salad I’ll toss
And bury your butt with cranberry sauce
Oh turkey, my turkey, you’re the one who rocks
Now I’ve gotten so fat, I can’t put on my socks
My love for you was fleeting
And we are finished I fear
But I’ll fall in love with another turkey
Same time next year.


Details | Ode | |

Ode to Trevor

We'd really like to thank you
i'm sure you left it here with love,
it really was so kind of you
but we didn't want your bug.

We thought you'd like to know
we really felt the pits
we thought of you quite often
when we had the squits.

Next time you come to visit
please leave your bugs at home,
'cause, when you bring them with you
they sure do like to roam.

So next time that we see you
I hope you come alone,
you can bring Rosie and Katie
but leave your bugs at home.


Details | Ode | |

Quips My EX GIRLFRIEND revisited


     1.   My ex-girlfriend tried to impress me when
          She told me that she is "Fasting"!  And I knew
          That she was true because, I saw just how
          Fast she ate that basket of chicken.......

      2.  The next time that she told me that she was "Fasting"
           It was three (03) double meat Whoppers!  And I have never
           Seen three (03) double meat Whoppers go so quicK......

       3. My ex-girlfriend was so upset!  She explained that when
           She was young that she could bounce a dime
           Off of her butt.  Only now, when she bounce the same dime
           It only flops!
         
  So, I looked on the bright side and told her that now she can
           Bounce a quarter on her belly button and it only drops!

         4. The last time that I saw her, she was "Fasting" on a
             box of cookies.
          
          * And boy, those (03) box's of cookies sure went fast!



Explanation: That is none sence and no one got fat in the making of this pun!
           
 
    4. I just hate it when my ex-girlfriend call's me!  Usually I keep my
       cell phone on vibrate and in my front pocket. My EX-friend
        Know's this.  She also, know's that I have a bladder problem!  Every time
        she blow's up my phone it make's me pee!
        I know that I hate it, but she give's me such a warm feeling and I take
        what I can get!
                                    

     5. My ex-girlfriend is so stupid that she can't ever give me a piece of
         her mind!  She has to get an substitute..... Ha! Ha! Ha!   He, He, He!

      6.My ex-girlfriend, She alway's cut me short!........  She wanted to give 
         me a piece of her mind, buy, she didn't have enough brain cell's left! Ha! Ha!
         Feel the Joke! Uh!

EMBARRASSING QUESTIONS?

       1.  When you "Pass Gas" and you know you did........
            And no-body heard it........ Is it proper to wait for someone
            to smell it first, before you say, excuse me..........
            Is it really too late....... That is what my girlfriend doe's!

       * I would just blame it on a friend!


Moments To Share:

       My ex-girl friend and I were discussing a poem that I wrote! She told
       me that it was an perfect oxymoron.......

       I told her that she was just a moron!


Words' To Live by:
       I was trying to explaine my mis-giving's to my EX-girlfriend......
       I told her that the problem was, not that I really love you, because
       I don't!  The problem is that I just can't get you out of my mind!


Details | Ode | |

To the Pint

O Guinness, lovely Guinness,
Irish black rose of the night.
I drink in your beauty,
a wonderment of sight!
Velvety raven body,
filling out that cold glass,
I look into your dark eyes,
you wicked, sassy lass.
I watch your tiny bubbles
cascade down and sigh,
like feather-like snowflakes
falling down from the sky.
Your heavenly head leaves
foam above my lip,
I cherish our shared moments
with each tender sip.


Details | Ode | |

Ode to Sarcasm

Sarcasm, such a delightful sound
Though who dwells in every place
What would I do without you around?

Sarcasm, you flow with such profound grace
Bathing the world with your halfhearted truth
Many sides you have to your twisted face

Why would anyone not love you?
Sometimes harsh, thou always lift
Lifts my spirits with words anew

Thine own power a wonderful gift
A gift, no doubt, like no other
You appearance always sweet and swift

Without thee the world would have no color
In a world without color I would die!!
Sometimes bright, other times dark—you’re a wonder!

You make me laugh and sometimes cry
Sarcasm, you are perfect for me!
At times I can barely understand why

I wish I could make the whole world see
Like the greatest joy you make life worth while
If only they could see your beauty

Why? Why are you so? Never mind you make me smile
You fit into every place, you’re elastic
You hold the world together like grout does tile

Sarcasm, thou who art so fantastic
Oh how I love being sarcastic…


Details | Ode | |

Ode 2 My Poetry

Why can’t I do it how I want to do it?
Been told my rhymes are simplistic at best
I may violate pentameter but I write what I like
Why must it pass some journal’s vapid test?

Behind a block of writer’s I’ve been hiding
Cowed by thoughts of editing snafus
Trying to write deep, intensive tomes of valid lore
Only to be chastened and abused

There’s elegance found in concise expression
Saying all the world in just a line
No matter that I know this I belabor all my thoughts
Create an elegy for elegance in time

Onomatopoeia is my best friend
And alliteration waltzes through my dreams
Thoughts chatter, clatter, chirp and clunk around about my head
Demanding that they be released in streams

And after I have done what I have done here
Exposed my heart by opening my head
I send it forth with hope that someone will enjoy my words
And get rejection letters in their stead

But won’t you like my poem just a little?
I promise it won’t be a trite conceit
You say my writing’s convoluted, so, I strive to simplify it
Then you call my writing sophomoric and cheap

Yet still my writing exists, remonstrating
That whether it be ballad or blank verse
It should be able to do just exactly what it feels like
And it finds you and your editing, perverse

It says it does not care if it is published
Doesn’t want you to consider it profound
For if you did then it might accidentally be common
And make cool people like me put it down

But won’t you like my poem just a little?
At the very least try to be noncommittal


Details | Ode | |

DAWN

DAWN 

Dawn is here
I did not sleep
Oh why oh why
Can’t my conscience let me sleep?

Did I kill little Bo Peep?
I might have 
As she should have been asleep
And not a practicing sneak

Dawn chorus some say is sweet
All I wish is to lie in bed in peace
Will all birds hence forth hold your incessant tweets
A man on tenterhooks 
Needs his precious sleep

Another day is born
Another sleepless night is done
If only I felt rested
And not like I just ran a marathon

Praise to all who can sleep through the night
I am not one 
And will forever envy your selfish delight

Dawn oh dawn why did you come so soon?
You came just when I was awaiting 
That soothing dream to appear
You can be so cruel and unfair 

New day that is dawn
You give much stress
I find your presence onerous to bear 
It is about time you played fair
And not harass me 365 days a year 


Details | Ode | |

Ode to a Skip

ODE TO A SKIP


Oh skip I love thee so
When you are sighted 
I am filled with much joy 

I love and need you most dearly
For you are to me 
What no one can ever be 

A friend with benefits
You are my dear skip
You are always there
When I need you
You complete me

If ever I pass you by
As I am in a rush
I am with sorrow overcome 
For I know I have missed
An opportunity for you to 
Shower me with much needed gifts

Rummaging through you
I find wonders galore
Your deep bowels are no hindrance  
For I delve in 
With delightful ecstatic glee

Oh dearest love my Skippy
What do you do to me?
My mother groans and moans
when I scavenge from you
One day she says 
the house will implode

Never you worry my dearest Skippy
I will never abandon you  
I will forever stay true to you 
 
What memories 
And great finds 
I have gathered from you 

Books 
Bric-a- brac
Some say a whole range of tat
I don’t mind 
For I know you give gladly

Oh glorious friend 
My ever pleasing 
Never complaining friend
You and only you 
I know truly loves
And understands me  


Details | Ode | |

Ode

O glorious cavern wrought with pinkish mystery,
Thou, whose puck’ring lips I have dreamt about,
Are the sacred altar of Sodom’s progeny .

How thy sweet effluence is set to rout
When that fearsome beast of mine doth attack
And rend thy cave apart with its purple snout! 

Venus’s temple on its hirsute mound
Seems paltry when likened to thy glory.
For to thou alone I am always bound.

It is exclusively in thy quarry
That I seek my precious stones of ordure,
Be they glist’ning moist or dark and hoary.

I shall gulp down thy mellifluous excrement
And wed my soul to its celestial scent! 






Details | Ode | |

Love feast

Love feast             by Steven Hudson

I have looked upon too many scarred, sullen and hard faces these many days.
Loud, crude, gruff men who take and push and fight.
This ship has run its course, sleepless, tossed about,
Every port and harbor, sea and foreign land.
My companions smell and to look at them would make you turn down.
I’m pretty sure I have a tapeworm and my piss is the wrong color.
So my love, when here at last I see your face,
You’re smile, piercing eyes, and silky long hair,
To gaze at you now is a love feast to behold,
And from now and forever you will always be…..
The most captivating golden retriever I have ever seen.


Details | Ode | |

An Ode To A Dead Apple

Ode To A Dead Apple
Oh poor Dan what can we say
He’s had such bad news delivered today
His Apple Mac that’s virus free
As expensive and speedy as can be.
To do your work is such a breeze 
Bug free it does not catch a sneeze
But what the Apple people did not do
Was protect it from the likes of you
Your Apple Mac that you so love
Is put to rest and looks down from above.
The death of your Mac is hard to take
Don’t do anything stupid for goodness sake
It was tired with all the work you do
And sleepy just like De and you
But listen to some advice that’s free
Never give it any more coffee or tea.
© 21/06/2102~GG~

To my poor Nephew that has spilled a mug of Coffee and Killed his Mac


Details | Ode | |

Ode to an Arborculturalist

Why that no good little birch
I think I alder leaf her
My aspens in the dirt
Don’t you know I’m not that poplar
I damn near choked on a little oak
And though I tried I am not maple 
Now the branches are all broke 
and the limbs are so unstable
 
I could go against the grain
But I’d hate to needle yew  
So I guess I’ll cedar later 
And bough out fir the one that’s true
  
Can’t see the forest for the trees 
Can’t tell just when the root will rot 
You know I think its elm diseased 
And I can do with out the knots 
Well now it’s really got me stumped  
Just when I should have sawed right through it  
And it’s too late to pack my trunk 
Or perhaps I just out grew it
 
I could go against the grain
But I’d hate to needle yew  
So I guess I’ll cedar later 
And bough out fir the one that’s true
 
Some trees grow up in a grove
Others make a stand alone
But there ain’t no peach with out a pit 
And there ain’t no pine with out a cone 

I’m sure the heart wood ain’t no good
So I won’t go out on a limb 
But when a tree is being felled 
I wish that someone would cry timber
I just don’t think that I’ll ever see 
A poem lovely as a tree 
So I won’t Beech and I won’t Pine 
I’ll just remind you one more time 

I could go against the grain
But I’d hate to needle yew  
So I guess I’ll cedar later  
If you were sap then you’d run too


Details | Ode | |

That Crazy Old Doctor

There've been times in my life
 where I've just had to say,
 "I must, give it all up,
 for, it's that kind of day"!
 
I must, really say this
 I really, just must;
 if I didn't say it,
 then, it wouldn't be, "just".
 
There's this crazy, old man
 we'll just call him, "Doc";
 who fills up blank pages
 with, "poetical talk".
 
He's scribbled, and scrabbled
 'til way, past bed-time,
 trying to finish each poem
 and, complete every rhyme.
 
If he hadn't done this
 he'd surely gone, "mad",
 his nonsensical nature
 was, all that he had!
 
No hidden agenda
 when first, he wrote down,
 each poem of nonsense
 to erase a childs' frown.
 
And, Doc always did this
 manipulate, "clues"...
 ..so that , all of his poems
 were merely geared, to amuse.
 
He loved to let nonsense
 be the order of the day,
 and, with every poem
 we all smiled, the same way.
 
His only intention
 was to set our minds, "free",
 his style, just did it
 so, poetically.
 
With his own tongue, in cheek
we knew we'd been had,
and his poems rhymed perfectly
proving he was no, "fad"!




The volumes of topics
 that Doc's written of,
 included all that could be
 written.....below, and above.
 
He's written of magic,
 puzzles, and games...
 ..with, strange little creatures,
 with, strange little, "names".
 
The, crazier his story,
 the saner he'd feel,
 and, the more that we heard
 convinced us they were, "real"!
 
His poems, were genius
 as he weaved us, a tale;
 with, nonsensical rhymes
 that did so, without..."fail".
 
"Old Doc", has quit writing
 he's up in heaven,
 this year, his birthday'd ...
 make him, a hundred, and seven!
 
He's given advice,
 taught what we must do,
 he said, "Be who you are...
 ..no-one's youer, than....you!"
 
He's maybe still writing
 in, heaven....you see,
 that'd be just like him
 as, that's who he must, be!
 
That, silly old doctor...
 ..as silly, as a goose;
 we all loved his poems,
 for, we loved Dr. Seuss!
 


Details | Ode | |

Ode to Espresso

Oh, Espresso, we praise you!
We kneel before the machine.
In awe of this ambrosia, this caffeine!
Oh, Espresso, giver of life, conqueror of sleep—
Our saviour at midterms when we must dig deep.
Oh, Espresso, our morning star, and afternoon routine,
Almighty, omnipotent, sacred bean!


Details | Ode | |

The Dime

There was once upon a time, 
Unexpectedly, a very small dime. 
He did not do much of anything,
Apart from gazing. 
He just stared longingly at the sky, 
Counting the clouds that drifted by. 

Dear old Dime, not very bright,
He did not shine, not a ray of light. 
Dark and rusty, 
Old and dirty.
Everyone did not care, 
Though they could use him and buy a bear. 

They did not want to touch, 
This old thing of such. 
They did not want to feel. 
That sick disgusting bill. 
He was old, rusty and dim,
But he hated the way man treated him.


Details | Ode | |

NEVER MIND THE JAGUAR XF

     or, Hollywood strikes out again...

I don't want the leading man 
in the current version of "Robin Hood"
He's handsome enough--don't get 
me wrong.  But, besides two tail
pipes before I die, I only want 
one night with Mark Strong.


Details | Ode | |

scandal rag blues

you really seem to think you're hot
silly little glamour queen
givin'up the money shot
steppin' out of limosines

how you make your daddy proud
acting like a debutante
hangin'with the who's who crowd
always gettin'everything you want

now splash it for the world to see
show 'em how you've got it made
and for the tabloid industry
hurry now before you fade-
fade into obscurity

silly little millionairess
livin'in your world of bliss
all hail the spoyold princess heiress
for in the last analysis...
I guess we'll always have paris!


Details | Ode | |

Ode to the Cheese Crispito

Although we all know it,
you can't spell out perfection,
and our stomachs to it we commit,
under our seasoned inspection,
the smell is in the air,
so thick we can almos taste its glory,
O how we try to not stare,
and like a wolf with its quarry,
we leap at it with great joy,
the texture O so splendid,
unmatchable by any false decoy,
the only thing we ever did,
was eat the Crispito.


Details | Ode | |

Ode To Brenda

Brenda is pretty, Brenda is sweet
She’s not very big, in fact she’s petite.

Brenda’s creative, now that’s a surprise
She has a good wit and has opened my eyes.

She’s cruel to a point,, my blunder she extols,
The trouble I have with some toilet rolls.

They roll from my waistband and not from the holder
Tyrone only noticed when he looked over my shoulder.

The last time I saw her she was just a scrubber
Now what example is that, and her a grandmother.

her husband walked into the room, her bottom he could see
Sticking up in the air, but where was she?

He rushed to the oven, the door open wide 
And there was Brenda kneeling inside.

Brenda my love he cried ... I’m sorry whatever
Take your head out the oven and I’ll make it better.

What are talking about she cried and removed her head,
The scrubbing brush in hand she looked at him and said.

This is the cupboard I’m giving a scrub
The ovens electric and it would do no good.

Thanks goodness for that he said in relief,
The meters being read and I don’t want the grief.

The cupboard is clean for when the grandson arrives
We need somewhere to put him, so we can survive.  
GG 2012
 


Details | Ode | |

ALWAYS TELL THE TOOTH IN COURT

 ALWAYS TELL THE TOOTH IN COURT

Queen’s dentist did a  filling in her  crown
Monarch paid him with one poetic ode
And then quickly left London town 
Dentist didn’t like this payment mode

Dentist and patient  in court over  bills
Judge said let him pay who wills
Lisping judge  said he wanted the tooth  
Whole tooth and nothing but the tooth

Dentist said she reaped what she sowed
According to the dentists’ payment code.
Judge awarded  dentist  an extra   ode
To clear up the royal mess on what was owed.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 

Written  for Nancy Jones’  Contest   “A Toothful Ode”


Details | Ode | |

"THE GIRL WHO : JUST PUSHED PLAY"(ode to Aerosmith music)

Well, this giddy little girl was tired of the SAME OLD SONG AND DANCE; she said I gotta get 
rid of the MONKEY ON MY BACK, and find someone to TAKE ME TO THE OTHERSIDE...where 
KINGS AND QUEENS are LIVIN ON THE EDGE...So I can  taste the SWEET EMOTION,..learn 
how to DRAW THE LINE and LET THE MUSIC DO THE TALKING...
 
  So, as she started on her PERMANENT VACATION the idea was to KISS HER PAST 
GOODBYE....though it was NOBODY'S FAULT she knew she had to FLY AWAY FROM HERE...
 
  The LAST CHILD of a bunch counting five, she had to do WHAT IT TAKES to stay alive...So 
with just a LICK AND A PROMISE and her LIGHT INSIDE she WALKED ON DOWN with a 
THREE MILE SMILE.
 
 
  She came upon a BLIND MAN they call UNCLE SALTY who saw her CRYIN and said I'll show 
you the way to your MAMA KIN... as they traveled on she began to CHIP AWAY THE 
STONE...and put all her SEASONS OF WITHER  behind her.
 
  Finally arriving to find MOTHER POPCORN who blessed her with this sound advice: 
 
  Take the long path my JADED one, past the HANGMAN JURY and down to the FARM...WALK 
ON WATER and realize that there is NO SUPRISE... though there may be RATS IN THE 
CELLAR there is always CHEESE CAKE in your eyes.
 
  Now she rides the TRAIN THAT KEEPS ROLLIN with the LORD OF THE THIGHS hoping they 
can COME TOGETHER in the SUNSHINE of the MOVIE  and DREAM ON here inside their 
AVANT GARDEN !


Details | Ode | |

A poem for the 'beautiful builder' at the the Ricoh arena

She looked really impressive
Small; and full of pride
A nonchalant gait, but sophisticate
Her work mates by her side.

It felt like she'd built it all herself
Her hard hat firmly in place
With a confident stare in the medias glare
an emancipated face.


I wanted to get to know her
I wanted to shake her hand
I wanted to say in my own private way
'Will you take me to my stand ?'


But as the sun shone through the vomitary
something made me upset
Her charms I decline
She'll never be mine
She was smoking a cigarette !


Details | Ode | |

THERE IS A GREEN HILL FAR AWAY - REVISED

There is a green hill far away
outside the city wall,
Where the drunks all go and 
drink their stuff and then they 
try to crawl. 

There is a green hill far away
upon the mountain top - 
The gypsies gather in their 
crowds and empty all their
slop!

There is a green hill down
the road at the traffic lights,
Where all the cars go 
speeding through - especially
on dark nights. 

There is a green hill up for sale
and money always talks,
So when a supermarket opens
up - the prices always chokes! 

God help us now we are all 
doomed, as the heatwave is now 
here,
So get me to the dirty pub and
I'll drink a nice cold beer! 

So, there was once a very green
hill looking oh so grand,
But the builders came and waved
their cash - and promptly bought 
the land. 

Fear not you MPs you are all 
doomed, and Guy Fawkes is now
here,
At last his mission is now complete
and we all drink and cheer! 

There was a green hill in the town
where people used their phones,
But now they are all stuck up there 
and looking just like clones! 

Thank you oh Allah and Good God 
too, I see you on the hill,
What's this I hear of Cherie Blair - 
she gives the crowds a thrill!

I say farewell to this green hill as
the phone masts do invade,
If I catch you phoning home you 
lot - I'll hit you with my spade. 

Thank god he's saved the holy
life and Allah sings the blues,
But now he sings the white man's
blues and promptly blew a fuse!

THE END

BY
DARRYL ASHTON


Details | Ode | |

Ode

Her skin is like a manuscript 
Gone fragile with old age 
That crumbles at the slightest touch 
Each time you turn the page.

But if you delve below her skin 
Prepare to shed a tear 
A poignant multi-layered core 
Dwells 'neath her thin veneer.

Content to wait on ripening time 
She patiently defers 
With firm and solid dignity 
Until the hour is hers.

Once hunger's longing flame is lit 
Her transformation starts 
She glows transluscent tenderness 
Her essence she imparts.

Her kiss doth linger through the night 
Her perfume ere next day 
Oh, fragrant onion, thou art beast! 
That's all I have to say.


Details | Ode | |

Ode to Miller McVie

Near the village of Abernathy Cove
There lived a man of great distinction.
It is to him that I dedicate this ode
As an explanation of his extinction.

For it is of one Miller McVie
That I now offer up these words.
It’s my hope that you’ll be able to see
Why his life was given up for the birds.

For as a boy young Miller it seems
Could not pronounce the letter “R.”
And the other kids taunts and screams,
Left poor Miller with a scar.

So from the town he would keep away,
And do his best to hide.
But in the woods he would play,
With the birds whom he’d chosen to reside.

Sometimes if the traffic was light,
Miller would sneak into town.
He’s go to visit the pet store at night,
To see what new birds they’d found.

One night the pet store caught on fire,
And it was burning out of control.
The situation grew much more dire,
Since he couldn’t yell fire to save his soul.

“Fi, Fi,” he called out
But no one paid heed to his call.
He knew to act without a doubt,
As he ran through the fiery wall.

Some say he died that night,
Trying to save the birds that he loved.
Yet others tell of a wondrous sight,
As the birds flew with him high up above.

So shed a tear if you feel you must,
Though I think you’ll find that it’s uncouth.
When I tell you now that Miller’s not dust
And I know for a fact that’s the tooth.


Details | Ode | |

I SAT UPON IT

While seating on the shiny bowl
I am waiting
waiting
but the worm will still not flow
The pain that makes the intestines insane
Let it come freely even if it may stain
Reading a newspaper 
The underwear down to my knee
I need the relief that coming out might give me
Pepto Bismol,Please release the clogged -HIT
I am tired of sitting upon it


Details | Ode | |

the leaves of fall

red, gold, yellow, green  
and a warm brown
the colors of the fall leaves 
laying upon the ground
one Saturday morning, 
I worked very hard
raking up all those leaves 
in my backyard
and once I finally got a big pile 
looking nice and neat
a devilish grin came over my face 
before I decided to leap
and with the jubilation 
of an innocent little child
I ran full speed and jumped onto 
that big leafy pile
laughing and thrashing about
I had me a ball
rolling around in my backyard
in the colorful leaves of fall


Details | Ode | |

Chuck Norris

You can gargel peanut butter
And slam a revolving door
You were born with a beard 
And at the age of two drunk your first beer
And afterward crushed the can on your head
You never run thats why you are Walker Texas Ranger
You help old ladies across the street and tell children not to talk to strangers
When you play monopoly 
It affects the whole world's economy
And your biggest secret is Too-Wong-Fu is your favorite comedy
You don't have any microwaves in your home because you believe revenge is a 
dish best served cold
And if all that isn't enough 
You beat connect 4 with one move
Ate a bottle of sleeping pills and just blinked
Chuck Norris you are amazing


Details | Ode | |

An Ode to Grass

No one talks about the grass,
But yet, it does so much;
It covers up the ugly stuff,
And adds a nicer touch.
When you fall amongst the grass,
And scrape your knocky knees;
It doesn’t tear your knees apart,
Like rock or grey concrete.
Or freshly cut, it smells so nice,
Yeah, nothing smells like grass;
It takes you back to better days,
Your young days playing catch.
It gives a place for bugs to live,
The good bugs and the bad;
It gives a soft and comfy place,
To sit if you are sad.
To really feel how great it is,
Remove your stinky shoes;
And walk among the cooling strands,
In springtime’s morning dew.
Sometimes I think about the grass
- It still amazes me.
There’s only one thing greater than
The grass - and it’s a tree.
So nature’s carpet needs a bow,
Cause without it we’d be blue;
And just remember if you’re down,
Hey - you can smoke it too!


Details | Ode | |

Ode to the Rapper

You, my friend, are milky white

You are the best rapper there ever will be, despite

You are a musician from Mammoth Inc.

And the music is funnier when you drink

You consider yourself "The Good Reverend"

However, never shall you be a Godsend

You are nevertheless extremely old

And with the ladies you aren't quite bold

My advice would be: stay away from cops

And likewise tobacco shops

Yet, My friend, You are the best

And I would have to say, I am truly blessed


Details | Ode | |

rum and grits

i walked for miles with
a voice that smiles 
humming off rays of my pass
in styles
 
starring down the road
which i've come from miles
drunk off the rum 

my sound is loud as bass
from a drum
banging ockwardly
from my ears to thumb 

snapping my fingers
the taste is yum
oh my the fun
chewing my grits like gum

skipping enjoying 
my grits and rum