These Animal Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Animal. These are the best examples of Animal Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
Lounging licking leaping
Prancing pouncing peeking
Corners closets crouching
Tail twirling twitching
Sniffing sensing sneezing
Hissing huffing hunting
Pretty purring preening
Curiosity kitty killing
Nine long lives living
-honestly...I have no clue why...-
As I began to rest in my fickle dream
Suddenly I was stirred from my sleep
I was greeted by many a whisker
And petulant snores from my sister
The cat mewed ferociously and purred
For there on the other side of the window—was a bird!
It chirped like a wobbly siren—the ass!
And I swear by my bosom it was pecking the glass
Suddenly, I sprang up in alarm
I swear my bosom was gone!
The cat then motioned at the feathered brat
For her bright breasts seemed extra fat
Of course it wouldn’t have been that
But I couldn’t just blame the cat!
I opened the window only a crack
And asked very kindly, “May I have my breasts back?”
Such pride she attained from my bosom
Yet why? –how would she use ‘em!?
The mockingbird merely turned a goodbye
But the stolen twins were too heavy to fly!
She plopped to the ground and squawked
I would have laughed, but I was shocked!
The cat scratched at the window and with her eyes
Said, “Prithee, take your breasts—she’s mine!”
Before I could think I had fallen to the ground
To a booming, most terrible sound!
My eyes then opened to a cat on my head
As the booming sound continued from my sister’s bed
Beware of wolves in sheepskins
My what clever wolves
I wonder if the sheep could pass as wolves
Perhaps they could go to Wolves R Us
I've heard of a Fox in a Hen House
I wonder if a Hen ever visits a Fox House
Who was the idiot that let the Bull loose
The china shop will never be the same
I also wonder why so many Bull remain
Especially with all the politicians shooting Bull
I was so busy I had no time to get ready for my trip
So I invited a pack Rat over to help get me organized
My house boat started to sink and he was the first to leave
It started to rain Cats and Dogs
I think I need a better umbrella
He told me I could get there as the crow flies
I think he lied, my arms are tired and I'm still here
I thought I would become my own boss
This Monkey Business is tougher than I expected
My inventory is eating up all my profits
All my clothing shrank when I came in from the rain
I have to admit I felt a little Sheepish
The judge asked him to pronounce his own sentence
He asked if he could be Hung like a Horse
All my friends call me Eagle Eye
I like that so much better than Cyclops
I would be much happier if I had two eyes
I hope you all enjoyed the trip to the Funny Farm
All the animals here are crackers
Spaniel dog breeder:
Parrot who mimics a Spaniel's bark:
Book on how to care for Cockers:
Originally from England, a well-rounded Spaniel stays in shape by playing:
Then showers and dresses by its:
Proportionally, male Dachshunds have:
(But size isn't everything)
Dachshund making critcal life choices:
A dog in Medieval France:
French dog's brain:
A French dog breeder raises:
(Cheated on that one)
Lassie was a level-headed dog and never engaged in:
Reared in a lovng environnment, she was a rather:
Bred in the capitol city of NC, making her a:
To commemorate her frequent (and often rowdy) visits to N.O. a streetcar was renamed the:
Snoopy immigrated to the States but alas, was found not to be a:
Thus he was deported back to England but was promptly knighted by the Queen becoming a:
Now a celebrity, he even has an entourage of nubile young female beagles named:
Footnote: He is also a regular on the foxhunt circuit where it is rumored that he is often allowed to cheat, prompting howls of protests from outraged and exhausted cohorts...
These are just for fun...I am trying my hand at them!
DROMEDARY'S NAIL POLISH
SMALL UNSENTIMENTAL HORSE
WILD DOG LANGUAGE
HOG'S MUSIC PLAY DATE
FELINE HEAD WEAR
Seeing the posting of the zoo unicorn
Could not wait to go see his horn
My eyes just could not believe
The boy I had been deceived
Poor horse got thrown a lot of popcorn
a Linda-Marie = (contest) =
-Bunny Hole- by:SKAT
hidden muddy home
dirty paws, good boy' good boy!
yummy with carrots :)
-Unwanted Fluffiness- by:PD
Big Brown Burlap Bag
drop Bunnies down By the Bay
Better off -Blue grave
~SKAT & PD~
Hear it chugging and tasle
The sun has gone down
Twilight, is still not dark
Small steps ... chugging and tasle
The dog is standing still
Sniffing and listening
Sounds comes closer
A small ball comes out of the bushes
My favorite toy, the dog thinking
Sticking her nose up ..... but ...
The ball is full of sticking spines
it makes a hissing sound
Hedgehog will not play with the dog
A-L Andresen :) - This is my dog "Maya" :))
(5th in the contest)
Farmer Dan, was a gambling man, who loved to play at some cards;
So to beat the band, he tried his hand, at the other farm yards.
On one day, he struck pay day, at the home of good farmer Dow,
And walked away, with some hay, plus a seven foot tall beef cow.
Dan looked so small, beside his large haul, as they sauntered back home;
But above all, Dan was feeling tall, and called his new cow, Gnome.
Dan had the urge, to try and scourge, more farmers for some winnings,
And if he surged, he’d go splurge, with pockets that would be brimming.
His plan worked, as he clean and jerked, all kinds of swag from his friends;
Yet they were irked, and went berserk, wanting Dan to make amends.
So farmer Dow, wiped his wet brow, and sought one last game from Dan;
Though he kowtowed, he couldn’t wow, the farmers to join his plan.
Dow demanded, a game two handed, to settle up the score,
Plus he planned, to wager his land, for Gnome and quite a bit more.
Each was praying, because to stay in, they had to raise the stakes.
It goes without saying, they were playing, for more than just ‘High Steaks’.
In loving memory of Jones,
The best duck I've known.
My pet and friend since I was four.
For a bird, he was dear;
I wish he was here
So that he and I could do more.