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Free Verse Dad Poems | Free Verse Poems About Dad

These Free Verse Dad poems are examples of Free Verse poems about Dad. These are the best examples of Free Verse Dad poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

Daddy

Daddy

Daddy, why did you go away,
Don't you know I wanted you to stay!

Daddy, when you left mom,
Don't you know you left me too.
Now all I do is cry and cry
--- I want to die!

Daddy, mommy say's it's better this way,
What does she know!
There's not enough band-aids to cover up the blues
Mom's kisses can't heal this kind of pain.

Daddy, I look around 
No one stands in your garage
Daddy, You took every tool
Except the hammer and sitting stool
Daddy, I still miss you 
--- I love you. 

***
***
Dear Daddy, I'm all grown up now
Haven't seen you since I was 10

Daddy, I sit on your favorite chair,
No longer do I miss the way you caressed my hair.
Daddy, I'm taking the old hammer and this BRAND NEW saw,
It's time to patch all the holes mom punched in the wall 
*The day you walked out on us*
Daddy, don't worry about the times I tripped and fell
Mom, found someone to fix  the loose boards,
Got tired of scraping my knees 

Daddy, I finally realized I'm okay,
I agree with mom, it's better this way.

by;pd


Details | Free verse | |

Fifty-Three Shades Of Grey

in the uncoloured tint of another everyday amongst the spit polished waxed apples tightly packed in burlap bags they walked like minded in their own burly wrap oblivious to the irony to their similarity of the markets round red fruit unaware of the tragedy the horror of events yet to come it will rain metal shrapnel as human minds grasp with the purpose of their existence as in their ignorance they understand their worth as human bombs with a belief the heavens will open the gates with a fanfare and a promised blessing for their divine act of unquestioned belief the clay shaped bricks the black iron metal stairs the drum sound of engines then the lull not after but before before the pulse of the storm the rain of death yet this moment captured this photograph with man and child in hand smells sweet you wonder bemused why? the world travels aimlessly singularly no one nothing in the universe suggests exposes even a hint even a glimpse not a clue that would lead reveal an answer. life in its contradiction like the proverbial apple offers both the miracle the curse.
09/23/2014


Details | Free verse | |

The Flame Is Still Burning

Death isn't what you think it is,
At least not when you sit with Death

Death I know. I know because once
I was in the same room with Death

Death isn't horrific, she, he is not a monster,
it was not frightening when I met Death

Death claimed my father when I wasn't there 
but she, he waited for me, the night I met Death

Death took the warm breeze from my father's chest
left him cold to the touch I was there next to Death

Death stole my father's voice left him quiet among the roar
of silent tears. I felt the moisture in the room next to Death

Death left with no more then what filled shallow pockets
graciously bowed on the way out, so I bowed to Death

Death I knew walked out empty handed as he does
my father's life still burning in memories, so I bowed to Death

my father's body was dead in that hospital bed 
but I couldn't help kiss warm my father's flesh
but I couldn't help speaking to him "I love you Dad"

three years passed since that night
my father is still alive in memories bright
he accomplished so much, touched so many
never a time when I needed my Dad
never once was he not there to help

how could you be sad for a man like that

he lives in my heart sheltered there
even when I am long gone he will live
preserved by my children and then theirs

how could you feel sad for a man like that

Always stood a giant in the largest of crowds
He was loved and admired, he never died
He was just needed somewhere else

Death isn't always what you think. he, she came and left
light as a feather I barely felt the presence of Death

Death?
 I've met him, when I meet her again
there will be no fear 
Death! 

It isn't always what you think it is.
When I met Death it was gentle as a lamb.



Maurice Yvonne
09/23/2014
Contest: The Poet III
Sponsor: Gautami Phookan


Details | Free verse | |

The Mirror Of Time

I hold three magic rocks, in my hand. Rolling them over and over and over. Leaving this 
reality behind, far behind I stepped into the magic mirror and there I was back in 1959.  It 
was the same month, November.  I looked around and it was the same as I remember it had 
been then.  Mom looked so young and beautiful and said, "The school bus will be here in a 
few minutes."  I looked at the calendar and saw that it was November 25th, the day before 
Thanksgiving.  I said, "But mom, I haven't been in school in forty years."  I got this strange 
look from her but she didn't say anything.  Walking toward the door I caught a reflection of 
myself in the hall mirror.  I was so young.  My hand immediately went to my face and I 
stopped and stared at myself for a few minutes. I said, "Mom, can I stay home and be with 
you today?"  Again I got that strange look from her, then she smiled and said, "Sure, it's 
your last day before Thanksgiving anyway, why not?"  She and I sit down and talked for 
hours.  Then I said, "Do you mind if we go next door and visit with Maw Maw and Paw Paw?  
I haven't seen them in so long and I've missed them terribly!"  Again another strange look 
from mom. Next door I saw Maw Maw and Paw Paw as they had been in 1959.  I wept and 
they all looked at me so strangely.  I hugged them and kissed them all and we talked for 
hours.  Dad finally came home from work and I ran and hugged him so hard. "Dad why did 
you have to leave us in June?"  Again I got strange looks from everyone.  My tears were 
falling.  I saw Aunt Frances and Uncle Bill who lived beside Maw Maw and Paw Paw. "I've 
missed you both for so long." Strange looks again!  They didn't understand because to them, 
it was just another day in 1959.  The day grew late and I knew my time was soon ending.  I 
got near the magic mirror and mom and dad were standing there so young and healthy. I 
said, "Mom I'll see you on the other side of the mirror, but dad, I'll see you another time, 
another place."  They didn't understand.  I stepped back through and my reflection was as it 
had been before.  Mom was sitting in her chair at age 84.  I said, "Mom, do you remember 
the day before Thanksgiving, 1959, when I stayed home from school and we spent the day 
together?"  She said, "Yes, it was so strange that you could never remember anything about 
it.  It was as though you had amnesia.


Details | Free verse | |

Year of the Acorn

Year of the Acorn
(For my Father who
has Parkinsons &
Alzheimer's)
22/12/12  21:21
pm

Out on a winter walk
one day
you solemnly put an
acorn into my hand.
Something in my head
whispered
"Keep it safe
and he'll be safe".
I kept it to this
day.

Year one.
One candle on my
cake,
burned into my
mind's eye forever.
You took a
photograph
to keep me in the
picture.

Year four.
My sister arrived in
the world. 
You took me to feed
the swans.
Back home
she greeted us with
screams.
I fled, covering my
ears.

Year thirteen.
Mother told me the
facts of life.
You kept well out of
it.

Year nineteen,
A disco at the end
of a long, quiet
road.
You always drove me
safely there and
back.
You were judge and
jury
of all boyfriends.

Year twenty three.
You gave me away
to the best
boyfriend of all.

A montage of eras
replay in the bright
lens of memory
till the year of the
walk
and the acorn.

And I kept it safe
so you'd be safe,
only now it looks
cracked and old;
not quite like an
acorn

and you are not
quite like you.


Details | Free verse | |

I Love You Dad

One of my earliest remembrances in this place; life
Was when I was about three or four years of age
The fear overcoming my heart thinking if ever
I were to be seperated from or lose, my father ?
Within my minds eye I see a small child in spirit
Walking hand and hand with their own beautiful 
Father amid heaven turning back to smile; John
There he goes, my dad and myself left sorting.... 
About this flesh; bittersweet, tides through time 
Which touch every life yet in faith I know that all 
Shall one day be well; as I wave and into the light
Their beauty's go rejoicing a soul; wiping love's tear.






...."John Harrison Sadberry ˜ March 26th, 1939 ˜ Beauty ˜ To, 
December 19th, 2012, &, 'Forevermore ˜ I Love You Dad!'".... *


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Free verse | |

Once Upon A Time

This is a poem about the future I'd love to have with the boy of my dreams.
None of this has actually happened yet (besides us falling in love with eachother) but it's how I would like it to happen.

Once upon a time, I became the luckiest girl in the world. I fell in love with a gorgeous boy with blue eyes, and he actually loved me back. He was like my prince, he treated me like his princess and would do anything for me. Today, we're united as King and Queen. It's been years, but walking down the aisle I'm still staring at the cutest, most perfect guy I've ever seen. When our lips finally meet after parting to say "I do", it tastes like Heaven.

Once upon a time, I married a gorgeous boy with blue eyes. And today, I saw those perfect blue eyes light up when he first held our little girl in his arms. She's got her Daddy's blue eyes and just a little bit of her Momma's brown hair. She's going to be spoiled and loved more than possible. She'll know we support her no matter what, and she can tell us everything. It will be perfect.

Once upon a time, one set of blue eyes became two, and we were made into a family. Now, that second pair of blue eyes is walking out the door to college, with a suitcase in one hand and a boy's hand in the other. He better love her and treat her just as well as her Daddy does.

Once upon a time, I fell in love with a gorgeous boy with blue eyes. His hair has dulled and grayed but his eyes are the same, and they've seen a lifetime's worth of happiness and love. My baby had babies with the boy she walked out the door with, and I can tell she loves them as much as we loved her. Now it's her time to live.


Details | Free verse | |

A Letter To Him

You irritate me.
You touched your daughter.
Actually, you touch not just yours,
but God’s!
You sick and twisted man.

You try your hardest to get it in
But she knows better than to let you.
You detest what a father should be
and act like nothing happens after.
All this, you see, will just past away
is what you say.
But no, Memories last through time.
Who could forget what you did?
You sick and twisted man.

But one thing irritates me the most,
how this has affected her soul,
how this affected her outlook on life.
how this has been embedded in her,
making her feel like  a computer with a virus.
You sick and twisted man.

I want to do bad things to you,
like kill you,
or banish you to hell.
But, I have been taught “we also forgive us who sins against us”.
So I forgive you, and love on you as if you are me.
it is written “Love your neighbor as yourself”
and I will.
You lost and forgiven man.


Details | Free verse | |

In Her Fathers Arms

The evening star glowing in a dust choked sky. A girl stands by a window, with a tear in her eye. She stares at the scene, hardly visible through the grime. She whispers in the wind, “Bring my Dad home this time” She opens the window, and climbs outside, Having a flashlight, in her hand, as her guide. Its glow shows the sides of the street. She’s afraid for what the light will meet Bodies piled everywhere she turns, She wants to go home, and never return. What brought this fate upon her town? All her emotions are stripped and torn down. A frightening sound explodes in her ear. Shadows in the road now appear. She run and hides behind a broken wall Praying to god the rest doesn’t fall. Footsteps coming closer to her She can’t tell who because it’s all a blur She backs away further so not to be seen in light, Quieting her heart pounding from fright. Gun shots and screams fill the air, All these sounds, her ears couldn’t bear. A slight whimper slips from her lips, And over the broken stone she trips. The shadows run closer, showering her heart with fear, She wishes they would just disappear. They pass by her; she fills with delight, She just wants to see her dad tonight. She shines the light, to show her place, And to the shine comes a familiar face. She doesn’t understand who’s to blame Because on the tag shows her father’s name. She holds in her tears and refrains from crying. She falls to the ground where her dad was lying. She lifts his arm and buries her face in his chest. She closes her eyes wanting to forget the rest. The shadows emerge yet she doesn’t see, How close the end for her would be. They look down at her, aim, shoot, and fire. Being with her dad is her only desire. The night had ended causing a little girl harm But she took her last breath, in her father’s arms.


Details | Free verse | |

DADDY WANTED TO FLY

Daddy wanted to fly
while growing up in the thirties
watching daredevil barnstorming pilots
in two seat bi-planes with wing walkers
facing down the wind

Daddy wanted to fly
when he cut holes in a bed sheet for his hands
Laced ribbon to tie around his neck
Sewed on a few rows of chicken feathers
and jumped off the barn
His mother wore out a hickory switch
on his backside     But

Daddy wanted to fly
WWII gave him an opportunity
He winged his way over the water to Europe
and learned to maintain his beloved planes
He watched single engine British Spitfires
American Mustangs and Thunderbolts
vanish into the horizon in search of enemy aircraft

Daddy wanted to fly
as passenger planes grew in size and scope
moving more people in shorter amounts of time
His family also expanded as children were born
so he took to the rivers instead of the skies
working on barges    And contented himself
watching Piper crop dusters fly low
over fertile fields running alongside the water

Daddy wanted to fly
but time rushed past
His heart gave out
And Daddy finally got his wings


Details | Free verse | |

Just speechless

Mom, Dad, How can i describe you? A friend of mine describes his parents as Clueless and lost Another said they are just mean and brat One who never wanted to hurt hers told me hers are Distant and lonely I met one who spoke in my ears That his mom is silly And his dad a drunkard Others call them evil, sinister, diabolical, and grumpy Though most choose to say it softly kind, giving, hardworking but unapproachable But how can I describe you, Mom and dad? Saying you are loving and caring Its an understatement How can i describe you? You teach me right from wrong, You encourage and support me , You laugh with me and wipe my tears away, when i cry Yes you are honest, You are wise, You are respectful, You are intelligent, You are a blessing, So warm, tolerant but patient, But that doesn't satisfy it all You're the reason why I'm so strong, Because you inspire You are the reason why am smart Because you nurture You are the reason why i believe Because you faith-filled When I need you, you're always there I hate defeat because you taught me victory Though today I have a confession to make When it comes to describe who you are to me I am just speechless
Dedicated to my dad and mom James and Cinda Carter Like with every relationship, they have had their highs and lows But no one can rule out that its the best couple i know so far They love God, they love each other and them love me Sponsor: Poet Destroyer A Contest: A poem you have not entered in a contest Poet: Rodgers Roger Carter Date:7/18/2014 Time: 12:00:00 AM


Details | Free verse | |

And

~~~ I recall . . . Dad's work shed to this day The scent of wood and dust in the air Cobwebs in corners and crooks Sun flooding in through windows His scarred and scored wooden work table And the countless tin cans of nails and screws And Dad working on a new plan His coffee cup forgotten and ignored And I would bring him flowers Precious dandelions, buttercups and daisies Which he would place in a dirty container of some sort Smiling, he would lift me up to sit beside him We would ponder his scribbled sketches O, the grand ideas he had I still have those doodles and outlines And the lazy afternoon would pass For me and Dad And later we would sit on the rusty porch swing Side by side, just swinging And I would hold his hand so tight Like I never wanted to let it go But, God had a plan Written in the book of destiny And who am I To question what is written by God So, I had to let go But today, I sure am missing Dad ~~~ April 14, 2013 Free Verse Placed First in Poet Destroyers Surprize Contest, 2013 Submitted to #1 Poems Only Contest


Details | Free verse | |

Can You Imagine

Can you imagine how it would be?

I remember when I was young.
To dream and wonder what I'd become.
The girls that I liked.
Holiday happiness with joy and delight.
My future in front of me is all I could see.
Can you imagine how it would be?


All the things, I could not wait for.
To be 16, there was nothing I wanted more.
To learn to drive and be my own man.
The time passed so slowly, I could not understand.
It seemed to me that fate was being too mean.
Can you imagine how it would be?


All the things I could do when I turned 21.
I wished for that everyday, I wanted to be on my own.
Having fun and going to the bar.
Being on my own and it seemed so far.
On to college to earn my degree.
Can you imagine how it would be?


Finding a girl so sweet and in Love.
My emotion is high and I'm in search of.
What to do now, I just don't know.
I love her so much, I want to be her hero.
Then comes marriage and our baby you see.
Can you imagine how it would be?


Watching my children grow as they do.
Life has changed and more bills come due.
I've grown up and now have more responsibility.
Life isn't bad at all, just a different party.
Kids move on and far away from me.
Can you imagine how it would be?


I've taught kid all that I can.
Now I can watch my kid become a man.
The days grow longer and the nights are hard.
I can spend my days working in my yard.
Life seems so short and not lonely.
Can you imagine how it would be?


I found happiness in all of my life.
Not just my kid or my loving wife.
With all my work throughout the years.
Through all the good times and the tears.
The most important thing was my family.
Can you imagine how it would be?


I open my eyes to see the bright sky.
My dream has ended and I know just why.
Today is my birthday and I am ten.
It's all a dream thinking back then.
My future is in front of me and that's what I see.
Can you imagine how it would be?




Details | Free verse | |

dads fight

Dad I wish I could make the hurt go away. I wish I could tell you it will be ok. It breaks my heart when I see you now, So weak and vulnerable is not who you are. When you look in the mirror you question everything you see, No longer do you look like dad to me. Your perfect smile is now in disarray Your hearing is slowly starting to fade away. The weight loss is starting to show. With eyes of loneliness and hurt I have only seen you cry once before Nothing prepared me for what I saw. When you broke down by the car, Your witty zip has left your vessel, Your light is slowly burning out. I am sorry for all I did growing up. I know you just wanted the best. I wonder now if I pushed you away, To a place where we are today. As a child you are blinded by the world I never realized God’s love. Please don’t be afraid take God’s hand He will help you win the fight. He will show you the love you need to survive. He will protect you through the night.


Details | Free verse | |

Wisps

"Friend,
Mind wandering through misty woods.
You don't understand your purpose.
Friend,
I knew you too little,
Please do not shed your salty emotions,
Not out of anger, not out of sadness.
Friend,
You now lose your way so easily,
You sink, you burst, you burn inwardly.
You weep from frustrations, 
From the guilt of an honest smile,
From pains, that you forget for a moment,
That come swiftly back to haunt you of your loss.
I understand, dear friend.
You once had a light and the woods seek to snuff it out.
Do not fear, dear friend,
Friend follow me, as I once did you.
Friend, now you see?
Yes, you see,
The little wisps in the fog that guide us home."

~In memory of Bill Hamman, and all else who have suffered the pains of Alzheimer's


Details | Free verse | |

My Darkest Childhood Memory-w

( This is a fictional write)


I was a short skinny seven year old boy growing in a town
Believed in fantasies of scary boogie to jolly old red man.
When dad took to see Santa, was worried about naughty list.
On Christmas Eve I went to bed early full with excitement.

Then heard a strange sound coming from the living room
Saw parents carrying toys placing them under the tree.
Returned to bed and where I silently cried myself to sleep.
As if was not enough heard the voices of parents fighting.

Saw Christmas tree torn, toys scattered and dad leaving.
Felt rejection, loneliness, physical and emotional abuse
It was awful and bitterly engrained still in my memory.
When the troubles come, come not single but in battalion.

===============================================
Sixth place win in:
Contest: My darkest childhood Memory sponsored by Walayee Whitlock


Details | Free verse | |

Love, Death, and Rebirth

The signs started in December
When she started waking up in tears each night
She was a normal girl with dark brown hair and darker brown eyes
She had plenty of friends and a loving family with just one thing missing
Her father. 

Days passed by and turned into weeks but only felt like a few seconds
Her life just whizzed by faster and faster until it was just a whirr in front of her eyes
Darkness filtered into her heart and mind until she didn't know if she could go on
But she had to. She couldn't let her mother and her sister drown in this same pain
She wouldn't let them.

She pushed all the darkness into the depths of her own heart
In hopes to save the hearts of the two people she had left
Because what else was there to live for now?
The rest of her world had crashed and her mother and sister was all that was left 
She wouldn't let them drown in pain too. 

She watched as they started to heal in her loving arms
Their hearts started to lighten up once more
But hers was just as dark as it was before 
And growing darker day by day 
But she wouldn't let that stop her. 

Suddenly a year had passed... and then two 
It only seemed like seconds to her but everyone else started moving on
Her mother and sister no longer needed her nurturing care
But she needed someone to hold on to
Anyone...

With nothing left for her to take control of, the dark pushed past her boundries 
It found a way into her soul
Until all she could see was dark and no light 
But her mother and sister were healed now
They didn't understand

The tears came back and engulfed her soul
Bit by bit until she wasn't sure why she was still alive
The grief took over like knives 
Piercing her skin over and over and over
It hurt so much.

She started to wonder what it'd look like to be dead
She could see him again if she was
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to endure this pain?
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to live knowing she'd never see him again?
It would.

So she started to hate herself
All that negative energy was starting to take toll
Everyone around her was breathing while she suffocated more and more by the second
She wished she'd just choke already instead of living in constant pain
If no one would put her out of her misery, she'd have to do it herself

She couldn't see any light anymore
So she grabbed the pill bottle off the shelf and just hoped it wouldn't take long to die
Deep down she still had a spark of light, but she just couldn't find it 
And now it was too late in her mind to change, to turn back and try to look deeper
She was done living.

That's when people started to notice that everything wasn't as peaceful as it seemed
They started to see how deeply depressed she had become
They wanted to help her see the light again before it was too late 
So they sent her away to see doctors and to take pills to make everything better
It was a start.

She didn't see a change at first but suddenly she could think clearly
Maybe what they were doing was actually going to help her see the light again
Yes, she still wanted to die, but maybe that wasn't the only option anymore
They cared,  and behind all their own problems they were trying to understand
They really were trying

Six months longer she would be treated and cared for
Until suddenly she was sent home from her treatment and care with a smile on her face
She had a new perspective
Someone had helped her ignite that spark in her heart until it was a glowing ember
She had been reborn

Sometimes you have to be able to experience the worst of it
To come back shining brighter than before
And if she had died that cold day in October, she wouldn't of ever seen the best of it
Or known that it would get better
and it did!

And she now sits at her laptop, with a smile on her face and warmth in her heart
It's never been an easy road and it won't ever be
But at least she knows she's lived through the worst
And it can only get better from here

So whenever she feels lonely or gets back into that dark spot again
She can look back on what she's learned and can read this poem
And remember that she survived the darkest depths of depression
And she will continue to survive it as long as she lives
Because she is stronger now than she ever was before ?


Details | Free verse | |

The Featherbeds

The feather beds are a string of mountains near where I live, famous for its raised bog lands, where my father and his brothers cut turf for many years. In spring / summer a wild cotton flower blooms giving the mountains their name.


In youths embrace I walked in mountains,
My father’s steps I tried to follow.
He led the way from town to wilderness
And there it was my soul he freed.
Windswept hills of raised bog and peregrine,
Swooped winds flared the will of the wisp.
Cotton top flowers waved their white clouds,
Beckoning me,  to loose myself in awe.
Slain and sod, man and muscle worked as one,
Bright Heather draped the hills a regal hue.
Bracken fronds greened the soil of spring.
Larks and curlew cries hung upon the air. 
As my father shushed us to silence and embrace,
His wonderland of peace.
At seasons turn and Bracken colours fade,
Gorse and heather flair their restful hues.
Sheep saunter through with heads bowed, 
They slowly leave the mountain once again.
The feather beds dim as clouds dip low and veil.
And silence flees before winter wind and rain 
In adults disgrace I left the mountains,
My father’s steps hard to follow.
Still longing to find the way of wilderness
To free my soul once again and be with him.


Details | Free verse | |

The Old Salt

The Old Salt was a special man who came along in a time
when he was needed most.

A time that is now gone forever.
When men believed and sacrificed, when hero’s walked the earth in mass.

When patriotism was not just a word
but,
by what men lived and judged the worth of each, 
a man who lived a life most of us cannot comprehend. 

An era now gone as this warriors tour of duty ends at this station, 
and begins anew in the heavenly fleet. 

Sail on Sailor into your unaccompanied tour,
we salute you.

What greater honor, that when a man moves forward, 
he leaves behind in each of us the best of what he was. 

A defender, protector, supporter, victor, a warrior, 
the last of the breed from an era when ships were made of wood
and men were made of steel.

The Old Salt has reported for duty that takes him away from us for now. 

Those of us who remain behind,
remember, and will continue to remember, 
because he now resides forever in our hearts.

As I look up at night, I envision The Old Salt,
a beret draped just above the eye, 
as he draws upon his pipe, 
quietly he waits.
The guardian of heaven’s gate.



Details | Free verse | |

Dad Son Dad

Dad 
is all weather umbrella
is what they say...

             rain or shine 
             there to protect 
             is what they say...

                         But then don't we 
                         open and close it as per our need
                         is he a puppet I wonder ...

                                         When torn and rusty 
                                         we discard to buy new 
                                         is he object with limited validity I wonder...

When Dad needs protection 
Kids hestitate to be his umbrella 
is dad's not someones son and son others dad I wonder ... 

             Cycle continues, many a Dad continue to suffer
             often at hands of son till he is dead     
             is dad derivative of dead I wonder...

                       Many a dad are taken good care of
                       Sons compassionate as to their own kids
                       is son derivative of bright sun I wonder ... 


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Hitendra Mehta
For June 2012 Poetry Soup Contest 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Details | Free verse | |

My Future Generation

I can act insane
But DO NOT 
Make me feel worthless

I belong in God’s family
He will bless my future generation

Don’t punish me for
Being myself –
Don’t envy my glee 

I can act like an
Adult, but I’d 
Prefer to have joy…

Not stress…
That piles upon us in our 
Everyday lives

Being childlike is

A rare beauty – 

No one prizes it…

No one came across it…

In this lifetime…

I can laugh all day
I can make you smile
If you’d accept my 
Childlike dreams of mine
Don’t treat me like a sick swine

Renew my young heart
Give me the ability 
To kill the old man…

I have my place in God’s family
He’ll be adored and glorified 
We’ll exchange prayers and hugs  
By my future generation

I beg of you – 
Don’t kill my childlike mentality
I’ll behave myself…
I’m positively sure that I’ll make you happy

I’ll still have pieces of a child in me

And pass it on to my future generation…


Details | Free verse | |

BABY GIRL

To 3/256 Cherokee Girl

Cute like the fly sun and with paddy curl hairs similar
From those summertime fields blow over her in full swim
And it fits in her small understanding
In front of this Adoptive Indian law
She grows like a lovely calf wondering it should not be.

Upon uplifted petals of her big eyes of half-brown
Indian bloom India Baby Girl a battle of love
And parents’ nightmare is breaking out for months
And the entire globe’s eye could see the idea
Of making a direct pain within her tender heart
And it does not matter you and I shall become
A parent and parching stirs and twist about father’s rights
He does not have it any more.

Flying among twinkly stars in faith
For the 3-year-baby girl the notion but a father’s lack
of Autumn and over the whole prairie shimmering
A compelled of him an Indian loves or ground
To the child he never felt before.

I think of those parental days of affection and love
When the Baby Girl was small and wanted it most;
Standing now in the sea of gestures, you great chief have missed
A cut generation goes by, and your conscience from what that weary buffalo
Love cries it certainly does not exist in your heart anymore.

Baby Girl!
Let us pray because I am going to take you home
Where you will be safe.
Baby Girl!
Let goes and come at last to understand
You and I and the prairie Mother
Always we are going to love you.


Details | Free verse | |

In God's Hands

  I am malleable in God’s hands, 
No one can shape me like He can, 
He never gives me anything that I can’t handle, 
He always knows what He is doing, 
No one can compare to Him, 
He is the father I never had, 
I can truly trust, love, and honor Him, 
Because He made me, 
He loves me, 
And I love Him, 
I will never be able to put my heart into someone else’s hands with such trust!
Because He is love! 
And I am His. 
- Inspired by Jeremiah 18:6 

                                                  
                                                  Jeremiah 18:6 NIV
“O house of Israel, can I not do with you as the potter does? declares the Lord. 
“Like clay in the hands of potter, so are you in my hand, O house of Israel.


Details | Free verse | |

Dad made cookies

She bolts in the house after a hard day at school
Throws her books down and heads to her room
Texting and Snapchat is what the girls do
Not wanting to do chores til she's in a good mood
She hasn't heard mom yelling for her
She wonders what's wrong
 and runs down the stairs to check
Mom isn't around but she smells something good
She heads to the kitchen to see what it is
It's dad with an apron and a big ole grin
He came home early to make her a treat
Giant chocolate chip cookies for her to eat


Details | Free verse | |

A Father In Love

PART I
The Joy of a birth, his own shine penetrating his eyes,
The new out born fruit of a long spend love,
Her hands rubbing against her red shiny chin,
Her legs crossed, the beauty that sings till the last breath.
Her thumb in her mouth, blowing, saliva flowing all over,
Her tiny grassy hairs and a sensational smile!
His mind throbbing with a pleasant paternal pain,
Oh, the enduring love! 

He curls her onto his lips, the roses of affection,
Fell on her bright cheeks and a spurt of emotions,
Through his blood, that glowed the heavens between
And his two round globes filled by a sea of passion.

“Come to me, my baby, my love, my little daughter….   
  My sweet little doll, 
  I will love you till my death…
  And I will carve a heavenly doll,
  For you to sleep with….My angel…”

The man thus became a father and a true paternal love
Flew through his heart, into the unknown worlds.
                              PART II
The enthusiasm of the youth, and desire for the taste of love,
Her tiny grassy hairs grown long,
The soft fabulous filaments of keratin hanging by her curves,
The dream of a girl, for a handsome prince haunting her nights,
And eventually flourishing into a full blossom shiny daffodil,
Her lips wet, her legs crossed, her red cheeks burning
And the sweats flowing through the blankets.
 Oh, the youthful pleasure! 

The ghostly love takes her into the world of souls
From there the memories of her father,
Pulling her back, into the past world.
The affection fought heavily with the gods, but, only in vain.
And the gods decided to keep in their beds, the beauty of hers.

Unknown of these realities, he opens the door
And finds his love fallen prey to the love of an unknown.
All his dreams to carve her a heavenly doll to sleep,
Perished only in the mightiest darks of the underworlds.
The life in his soul had gone and the bird shall sing no more…

  “Not yet, my love, not yet ….
    I haven’t died …my love ….I haven’t”
 
He fells on his knees and takes her into his arms,
Her head hanging down by his flexed elbow,
Her breast pressing hardly into his heart,
His face bends, lips on her forehead,
And his teethes hurting her pale feathery skin,
Tears of unfinished love dribbling from his spheres, her face wet,
He cries loud with no breath in-between.
                                THE END©Anees Rahman


Details | Free verse | |

Work

Work.
Toil.
The pain I put in the ground.
For such a precious thing.
Corn. 
The family enjoys their meal.
They plant their leftover kernels.
And wait for me to tend to them.
Work. 
An endless cycle in which happiness is born.


©Demand4poetry
21 February 2013


Details | Free verse | |

For My Dad

More than two years it be since me old dad had to fly. I miss him you know, he was 
my best friend. I miss the twinkle in his Scottish,Irish,American eyes, a kind and 
caring Gent was he. Times there are when I sit on the porch and talk to him, like he 
was there next to me. If anyone was to hear they'd think a loony man I be, guess I 
wouldn't disagree. At the the age of three orphaned was he, placed in the 
orphanage with two of his four brothers. Cruel treatment he did receive, still had the 
scars to witness the abuse they dealt him, undeserved though it be. Never did 
break him, stubborn he was, passed down by his anstery, can say the same for me. 
Great depression was on, none could afford another mouth to feed. At the age of 
fourteen put out on the street , all because he refused to stay with a farmer who 
wouldn't let him finish school. All the man wanted was for dad to be his tool. A little 
help from a friend and some kindly Gents, a sleeping room he did get. Worked three 
jobs finished high school, I told you stubborn he be. Old Uncle Sam drafted him then, 
a soldier they needed him to be. Only five nine one hundred thirty five he was 
soakin wet. Balck hair, hazel eyes, a fine looking lad was he. Thirty cal. machine 
gunner he was assigned, to everyone's surprise. Little man was he, but the heart of 
a lion he did have. From the shores of France to Berlin he did fight. Bronze star for 
valor, Holocaust memorial award, battle for Atlantic,European theater,Seinne river 
crossing, Rhine river crossing, battle of the buldge, army of occupation, all these 
medals he did receive. I know if they'd asked him do you want to fight a war? No 
thanks he would have said, for a peaceful man I be. The day they placed him in the 
ground, amist his World War II brothers, the sky was crying, and so was I. Taps for 
him they did blow, gun salute. Folded the flag and gave it to my mom, in her eyes I 
could see that her world had come to an end. Such pain in my heart, I just wanted to and flee. Instead I stubbornly stood there, to honor the memory of my dad.

In Loving memory of my dad: W. Jack Ross :  1924-2009: I still miss him.


Details | Free verse | |

Dear DAD

Oh Dad
You didn't smile! 

You were trembled, and tired
And.. feverish, you were! 

Your eyebrows arched 
And your lips tight 
And I didn't smile.. 
Oh Dad..! 

You were anxious, 
you swallow the fear
For the fear on me
Oh dad..
While, I was growing up! 

Aah my little heart.. 
If you were a herb for his cure.. 
I would surpassed my heart
Before the death, block your 
Eyes from me..! 
Fatima Nusairat


Details | Free verse | |

left alone

           
         
         Now I am left alone with tears ~

         with all shared may sadness cease
         the darkness of loss as fears increase
         your heart wants to hold on for hope
        

          losing the one expected never ready 
           going through acceptance you think
          until time stands still and life does cease 
       
           Now I am left alone with tears ~
            
          every thought now to late to speak
            all you thought you knew you didn't
          when death comes swift no real preparation

         How long will this hurt one can only wonder 
          The tears fall hard , the tears fall alone    
           saying goodbye forever your gone .
               
           
          

          


Details | Free verse | |

Birthday I Will Never Forget

It’s been 5 years since I’ve seen my daddy and he’s going to be here
Here at my 9th birthday party with all my friends and family
I can barely contain the excitement but a little nervous too
So many people waiting for me at the skating rink
All there to celebrate my birthday, everyone there for ME
As I see my daddy I take off running into his arms
And I’m crying and so is he as we embrace each other
We’re both so happy with smiles across our faces
Looking around I see all my friends, their moms and dads
I see my family and for once my mom AND my dad are here too
All waiting for me to blow out my candles and make a wish
But this was my wish to have everyone I love here for me
But then my dad asked to take me to pick out my presents
My mom said no and they both started to yell in front of everyone
Everyone watching and staring at them argue
As I sat in a corner crying because all my dad wanted
Was to take his little girl to get what her heart desired
Mommy whisked me away and daddy never got the chance to say goodbye
Mommy fought to get me in the car as I stared out the back window crying
Wishing I had made that wish when I blew out my candles 




Details | Free verse | |

Scars Left Behind

You were always honest
unfortunately it didn't extend to yourself

Regal persona was never exceeded by your accomplishments
If only you were as important as you thought others thought you were

Some bring joy when they enter a room
no one would ever accuse you of that
Leaving was always the best gift you could offer

Being you could not have been easy
No friends to speak of
accept one
maybe not even him
I think he froze in your shadow
He has begun to thaw in your absence

Strangely I miss you
Not entirely sure why
Do I in some weird way owe you for my success?
Without you I would not have been born

You are gone
Certainly not forgotten
The scars are my reminder
A multitude of memories mark my soul
Not your typical father son fare
Norman Rockwell wouldn't paint our picture
I wish I could remember happier times
some wishes don't come true

Eventually our nightmare came to an end
You gave us the gift of leaving
Am I evil for being Thankful?
You died alone
Should I have flown to be by your side?
Perhaps
Somehow it seems fitting you parted in this way
If I had come I may not have been able to hide my relief
Now we both have rest



Scars Left Behind Contest
By: Richard Lamoureux


Details | Free verse | |

Cuddle Babies Replay Memory

I remember the day Trixie died,
Sinbad staring out upon her grave.
No crying, just day after day, homage.

I couldn’t stand seeing the pain,
Nothing I did, petting, holding,
Could bring him away from the grave.

So down to the pet store I drove
Hoping for a partner to please
And found a pair of cuddles, babies

Arms wrapped together in play
One black one orange which should it be?
Orange like Sinbad or black?

But how could I take one from another
Leave another hole, so black and orange
Babies two, drew Sinbad back over

To sleep the peaceful sleep of cuddles
Warmth from another, held like a mother
Or held like a father, Sinbad was mine

Once more we could live in happy cheer
Death deserted from our midst
When the wonder of youth appeared.


Details | Free verse | |

Never So Gracious

A full moon night to my delight what is so wrong with doing what's right nothing is right after so long no use in complaining time to move on The Dream Water one day might take me away farther from the comfort of familiarity I float on my back then shut my eyes my body now sinking into ocean arms open wide Now swallow your son back to his nature when he is no longer needed to stay here the next generation are dooming themselves they need my experience to guide them through hell Why should I bother on my own, I strive through I turn my back on the thought of bothering to save you alone in this world my, is it spacious I'm finally smiling, never so gracious.


Details | Free verse | |

TO MY DEAREST PARENTS

I was in a big world
wherein there's a crowd in every place
I can go on my own
yet, I go to the repeated phase

There are two most important face
that might makes my life's craze
I might see them as a King and a Queen
in a home where they conquer

It's hard to set aside their commands and demands
even if it is too much, their authority is a must
whether I cooperate or disobey their remarks
they're still around, somewhere, to still keep in touch

so even if those Christian people
keep on telling humanities
about how God created everything
I will always owe my life to my King and Queen,
to my dearest parents.


Details | Free verse | |

Father's Day

                         Father's Day

Every day is Father's Day
Dad grew old and frail in natural order we fear
War and age created gaps in time, holes in reason
Added to detraction's on his decline
Generations formed coalitions without permission
Things come into existence for a time 
We are the children by him and by his side
Who grew, arms and legs, solid foundations 
Creation, with other supports, sometimes failed
We grew our own gaps, holes in reason, ways to end
By digging in the wrong direction
Then, hung with vigilance, understanding, change
Clinging to hope like virgins in May
Waiting for what may come our way
Dad survives purely on love in poor health
Between you and me, he feels the power  
We are his children, his pillars of support
No matter what the pain or cost
Old, collapsed, an ancient structure
Falling our way one last time
We catch and hold him up in honor
As pillars on either side to do just that


Details | Free verse | |

IF I WERE A BOY

If I were a boy, even just in a dream. 
I'll give my girl flowers everyday. 
I'd let her know how much she's loved 
and assure no tears fall from her eyes. 

If I were a boy one day I wake up, 
I'll kiss her eyes 'til she drops. 
I'll lay her down in a bed of roses. 
I'll carry her 'til we reach the heaven's door. 

If I were a boy even for an hour. 
I'll tell her exactly who I am. 
I will not cave in the shadow of my past. 
I'll give her the happiness that lasts. 

If I were a boy, 
I'd keep the love on fire. 
I'll respect my mom, sisters, and wife. 
I'll be my kid's greatest model dad. 

If I were a boy, 
I would be a real man. 
Who knows exactly what makes a man, 
who can't be moved by other woman.  
 


Details | Free verse | |

Sharing Dad

Dad was puttering around today
Playing with me
God we haven’t played in years
	You know, Dad’s eighty now 
	I remember how he looked in photos at twenty
I remember the twinkle in his eyes
at my sons two year old birthday party.	
We played computer, you see Dad it can do this LOOK
LOOK here it does this too!
	I did so like kissing the top of his bald head.
So good to see that old comb-over long gone now
So good to smell the MY Dad smell of clean clothes and soap.
Your files need to be organized Dad.
You have them all glommed up in with the general documents files.
Know wonder you can’t find them, all the love poems to his dear heart Ruth.
	I wonder if he remembers my wedding day.
	He was so handsome in his tux that day.
                I remember his smile then as he watched me 
                walk the white carpet in the garden by the mill pond.
Joy, now is that any name to call a dog [oops SHE doesn’t know she’s a dog!]
The dust mop of a pooch barked indignantly as, I took her Daddies attention from 
her.
              Had a dog once, Babe was her name, she was a huge sheepdog, we lost    
our Babe when I lost my Dad for a long time, BUT he's been back along while too 
now

Dad was sharing with me and I so loved it. Me, of course being his first girl, 
sharing with me, his love and happiness with his last girl OUR Ruth.


Details | Free verse | |

50 Years-Korean War

Published by Poetry Explosion of PA
In Loving Memory of my Dad, Peter J. Mariotti
He left this world on May 9, 2011.  I miss him so.



50 Years-Korean War



		Dad, you were one of the foot soldiers,
		When the Korean War began,
		You were among the many to fight
		In this foreign land,

		You went bravely into battle,
		Because our country told you to go,
		You didn’t ask any questions
		You just went to fight the foe,

		North Korea was Communist,
		South Korea was not,
		The country had been split
		After World War II,
		Now American boys were fighting
		On Korean soil,
		The South Koreans needed help from
		The Red, White and Blue

		Dad, you were a hero,
		You served our country well,
		Now after 50 years
		You finally were able to tell,
		The story of your war
		And the misery you saw,
		The Korean War had been forgotten
		But now at long last,
		It will be remembered,
		As an important part of our past.

		Love always

		Celine Rose Mariotti


Details | Free verse | |

World Cup

19 Girls chasing a ball:
Dirty shins, sweaty bodies, bouncing ponytails.
Grass stains galore,
I stand: panting, watching.
Never fast enough for this hunt.
For my father, I must stay.
For my father, I bloody my porcelin knees.
A spotted rocket flies my direction.
Think fast!
Kick! Goal!
Maybe there is hope for me.


Details | Free verse | |

sorry for the dirty laundry mom


I'm not wearing underwear
I can’t afford to clean my clothes
I shower every day
and sensitive skin from soap and psoriasis makes me itch
But I have bills to pay
I know you understand
Raising my little half brother and half sister
I've only met once
who are an ocean away
But this isn’t my story, it's yours
and the memories that remain

I know we've talked about it
Your pain and mine
About dad an alcoholic, and the abuse
and how you’re still attracted to it
But I still remember soo many nights
And soo many strange days

You dragged by your hair
I'll never forget
You thrown through the door
is embedded in my head
You with black eyes
you fell out of bed
The screaming 
The fights
I remember everything said
My name 
My brother’s name
Psychological abuse for you
soo long ago mom
You left and I don’t blame you
Years of you being cheated on
And dad would introduce us to his girlfriends
Easter holidays treasure hunt
While your husband was out betraying everyone

I know you know
That he talks poorly about you
And acts like the better man
But mom I remember
and you need to understand
What you went through
And the nights when I heard the door slam close
because you were fighting
and he told you to leave
That was how I met god in a sense
and always prayed for you to come back
Then finally I prayed for you sanity safety and for you to leave
And I would cry
as quietly as I could
cry myself to sleep
and chances are
dad either fell asleep
or went out in his drunken stupor 
to cheat on you again

The divorce is over
It’s been over for years 
But yet its still messy and I bite my tongue and remember
The night you came into my room
And told me you had to leave
I remember taking beer to kindergarten
Hiding it from you and dad
To throw it away
And my teacher in grade three finally asked
No lie mom
I had the same teacher in kindergarten and grade three
I could write an entire poem
about all of the people who shaped my mind
But I need you to see
When I come visit and am called an incest family man by your boyfriend
for giving you a hug
You’ve fallen into the same trap
And it’s like my own mother I’m not allowed to love







Details | Free verse | |

In My Community

Our Ancestors fought to the death,
Just so we can live a brighter day,
So before you light up that blunt of meth,
Think about what you’re giving away,
It was a glad day in history when Obama rose to victory,
The first black president was all we knew,
Dark skin is in!
Haven’t you heard?
That even in our community, 
You can get burned,
It’s a sad day when people would rather stay home and “Crank That Amber Cole”,
Than get up and run to a poll,
In our community,
Rockin’ Luis V is better than having a college degree,
And teen pregnancy is not only a trend,
But the single motherhood that follows should end,
Young girls learn of a wonderful prince to take them away,
Nothing should change thought their mothers prince didn’t stay,
And as the tears fade away,
She grows stronger every day,
In our community,
Fighting is no longer a word,
You argue with someone and shots are heard,
Girls showing places the sun don’t show,
So how do they expect the community to grow?
Where love is a figment of imagination,
Making a young child question her creation,
Young mothers would rather buy the iPhone 5,
Then satisfy her baby’s cries,
While her new man’s eye,
Wander up another girl’s thighs,
In our community,
Where #team dark skin vs #team light skin,
Makes others not love the skin they’re in,
Love, lust, hate, and trust,
Giving a rose on Valentine’s Day is no longer a must, 
Where bad is good and good is bad,
Who would think to see their grandmother sad?
Her hurt and pain,
Shows how our community has lost everything her parents fought to gain.


Details | Free verse | |

Regret

Regret

I regret many things in my life.
Not been able to spend more time with my wife the love of my life.
I regret not been able to stay close to my mom and my dad, they were 
All I had, my childhood memory, that yellow truck my dad got me.
How wonderful life is when you are young, when you try to reach up to the sky.
Everything seems so tall that was my challenge to grow old. 

I regret not been there when my dad died. He loved me the most out of us nine!
I took care of him, helped him when he was weak, he used to tell me I don’t want to die I can’t leave. You are still young; I said: “hey are you serious dad”? “I have three kids!...I'm 53"
But I know he was too soft. He hated the thought of dying, he loved been with us just to make sure we're ok.

I regret when my mom died. She still bring tears to my eyes, my heart still bleeds
At the memory of her smile. When I need a back scratch she had the roughest hands
House work and cooking that she didn’t mind at all. I loved her all my life and when she got very sick she became like a child. Talking about why she can’t see in color any more?

It’s difficult to explain to a sick person especially your mom, you breakdown before you even start to tell her.

I regret when my wife fell sick with the big C, I questioned every little thing, to me I was always right in doing the right thing. How and why kept popping up every time I wondered
This thing happened too fast, it took me by surprise.
I blamed myself for not listening, when she complained about her agonizing pain, I thought it was just the same.

I regret many things in my life.
I thought If I can get a second chance, I would change it all again!


Details | Free verse | |

Daddy's Little Girl's

Every little girl needs her daddy 
to love her with gentlemanly charm.
To hold her tightly when she is afraid and keep her safe from harm.
Daddy have you ever wondered whose holding us now.

From pigtails and bubblegum,
to lipstick and high heels;
Daddy whose going to be their to hold our hand.
To help us mend our broken heart,
teach us that true love is real.

Daddy you never stop to wonder the day
you walked out on mom was the day you abandon us too. 

Now as we grow older whose going to teach us to dance in the living room,
Whose going to see us twirl.
Whose going to bid us goodnight
And tell us everything is going to be alright.

Daddy your actions were selfish your desires divide our home
Now daddy you no longer belong to us alone.
You forgot along the way that there is no love that equals that of daddy's Little Girls.

Daddy you once said you prayed
But along the way I think you forgot to ask God
To guard your heart and protect your family from your selfish wayward ways.

The day you married mom
The day you created us
You forgot you made a promise
To stand with us for better for worse

You promise to love us and watch us grow
Dad you failed us
You replaced us for ashes and clay
We were meant to be daddy's little girl's.


 


Details | Free verse | |

My Heritage

My heritage is a mixture
Of backgrounds.  Let's start on 
My Dad's side of the family.

My Dad's mom is Irish and English.

My Dad's dad is Irish and German.

My Mom's mom is Scottish and Irish.

My Mom's dad is blood Hungarian.

So in other words,
I'm a mutt!  or as others say,
"Heinz 57!"


Details | Free verse | |

Blame it on the Moon


          Underneath a magic moonlit night as 3 shooting stars take flight

          twinkling silver blue shimmers , it was the passionate love that night


          The moon and stars held a party and sent one of their own    

          a creation in the making , a star rising from one star fallen


          entranced with the magic night and my solider Fitton ~

          it was an Angel's decision a gift bestowed one to cherish and hold 


         Never a doubt in my mind through watching him grow well Fitton ~    

         Full of creativity and charm , the young women that follow him enchanted 

      
          character and wisdom , success driven , as the moon whispered one night

         This Son will be one all will know , he will be loved by many .. your gift given


         poetry in truth of fate on a magical moon lit night , a story told

          Blame it in on the moon , or blame it on love and desire Fitton ~

          I know I was chosen by he , Your given Mom and Dad in code ~

      For my Son in Film and 1st AD "House of last things " 3rd season of Grimm :)


Details | Free verse | |

Howl at the Moon

When she was 8,
You howled at the moon,
and caught the attention of the men in blue.
You steered across the line,
You argued, You spat
until the night sky faded into dawn,
and they deemed you worthy
of wandering home. 
But in those hours of darkness,
she sat with an empty space on the blanket
looking up at the stars as fireworks
burst around her and 
asked why you weren't there.

When she was 17,
You howled at the moon. 
It was late and you had learned,
So you hung your head out the window
while the rain stung against your skin.
You taunted a cop,
You laughed, you puked,
As she fearfully drove you home.
In tears, she declared that she 
could not leave you there alone.
You were her dad. 
She stayed. She watched.
She wanted to be there...for you.

When she was 19,
You bought her some beer.
It was late. There were friends. 
You felt like a kid again, partying with the crowd,
And you were a hit, the provider, the crazy one.
They rallied around as you slurred your words.
You laughed. They laughed. She laughed.
This was the way to have fun.
You explained that this was not 
her first rodeo.
She was going to do what she was going to do
and you were going to be along at her side
As she howled at the moon.

When she was 23,
she howled at the moon.
Her skirt was short. Her top was low.
She danced. She drank.
And so did you. 
You were guiding her, you said.
It was just good ol' fun.
Except it wasn't fun
when they pulled her out 
of the mangled steel
and covered her face and shook their heads,
And now you howl at the moon,
deeply, sorrowfully, howl at the moon.

 


Details | Free verse | |

Gift Of Mortality

An earthly existence
A universe beyond my minds, comprehension
I die
I rise
Life lessons reviewed
Homeward bound
I am not lost, after all!
I am a willing participant
Serving, the Father, of all creation
His son combined, ‘producing life’ as we know it
Representing them, in everything I do
I am nothing, without Love!
My heart full of faith, loyal service I give
Learning how to unconditionally serve, as the Father unconditionally, loves me
Worshipping our Divine Creator’s existence
Choosing to live, moment to moment
Being as one with ‘Our Universal Father’
No physical permanency
My physicality, disappearing
My mortality existence, I let go of
Death temporary
My spirit alive!
Relief, Peace
‘I am only passing through!’
A unique, experience of mortality 
A gift, I am blessed to experience, to live!


Details | Free verse | |

The death and re-birth of Robin Williams

Waiting for you is like waiting for death
I called and asked if you would nurse me
When I fell down and injured by back

Waiting for you is like waiting for my father
I sit by the door with hope in my heart 
In my mind you call and say I need you
But the call is never answered

Waiting for you is like waiting for a cure
I treat myself and take my medicine like a good boy
But my arms and hands are too short

Waiting for you is like waiting for god
I listened as some else was abused and abandon 
I say that we have a lot in common
But she said let me put my arms around you
Because god has not forgotten about you


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Dad

Dear Dad 				
Why don’t you love me? 
The small brown eyed girl asked her father as he beat her at night,
 then with a smile in the morning he’d scoop her up in his arms to play.
Why don’t you love me? 
The bigger brown eyed girl asked her father as he walked out and
never came back.
Why don’t you love me? 
The young brown eyed girl asked her boyfriend of two years,
As he walked out the same door her father did eight years before.
Never to return.
Why didn’t you love me?
The older brown eyed girl asked her father at his funeral.
As she leaned over the edge of his casket and kissed him gently on the forehead,
Tears running down her cheeks.
Why couldn’t you love me? 
The oldest brown eyed girl asked as she lays Jasmine’s and roses
On her father’s grave.
Only a row down from her old boyfriend’s,
With love that never dies.
And her question is answered in the wind, 
As the answer is whispered in her heart.
How could you love me?
If you couldn’t love yourself?


Details | Free verse | |

MaMa

Mom.
Hey Mom.
Did I tell you I love you?
Well, I do.
Daddy loved you too.
I miss him too Mom.
But this man,
Is not Daddy
And can never replace him.
I know your're lonely,
But Mama he hurts you.
How can you love someone that hurts you?
You cover your bruises with long sleeves and makeup.
You smile in public even though you cry at home.
He comes home from the bar,
And all he does is yell at you.
All he does is yell
And then he hits you,
For no reason.
Mama why do you stay?
Mama your lip,
It's bleeding again.
Come on Mama,
Let's go home.
Our real home,
Where we lived with Daddy.
Him?
He'll never find us there,
Daddy will protect us.
Come on Mama,
WE're gonna go home.


Details | Free verse | |

why daddy

dad you were my hero!
the one i wanted to be just like.
everything i did was to make you proud...
you walked out on us...
i know i wasnt a perfect child...
i just wanted to feel love from you

mom always told me that you would be there for me
you were until i disappointed you...
i thought parents were supposed love their children no matter what...
you didnt do that
 you always put me down 
told me i was such a shame to the family

now that i have grown up
i relieze life is better with out you in it...
and i no longer wanna be just like you
i could never walk out on my kid
you sicken me...
how could you give up the child that you gave your name to...
i understand you have other kids
but to just give up and not have anything to do with one of them
and to not let that kid know his siblings....
i could never do that 
no matter how much my kid disappointed me...

i found my hero...
he stepped up even tho he didnt have to...
he treated me like his own...
he was there when i needed a daddy and you werent there...
he was there at my worst....
and he is there at my best...
he will be my best man when i get married...
my kids will know him as grandpa...
they will never know you 
cause i cant risk you hurting my kids
the way you hurt me...

the thing that gets me the most is....
how you made it look so easy
did you even think about the lil boy
who carries your name and...
has your blood running in his veins

i dont think you did...
and if you did you are
a heartless piece of crap

even after all you have done to me...
physical, emotional, and mental abuse...
i forgive you...
not for you but for me so i can move on with me life


Details | Free verse | |

DADDY'S GIRL

      Bob. He is passive.
      He is not aggressive
      in any way, shape, or form
      whatsoever
      when out
      in public.

      When he gets home
      all the slights of the day
      coalesce into a critical mass
      and detonate
      vaporizing his
      namesake.

      Little Bobby Junior.
      He doesn't cry anymore.
      He has learned to survive
      stoically
      but Bobby
      is away at
      the hospital.

      My name is Celia,
      I am his little sister,
      and I bawl like a baby
      when I
      am the
      one.

      That is why I am hiding.

      Am I under the bed?
      No Daddy keep searching.
      Look in the closet.
      Ha! Fooled you again.

      Wherever could I be?

      Now, Daddy,
      you shouldn't look downstairs.
      Wait! Daddy,
      don't look in the kitchen.
      NO! DADDY.
      Don't open the Pantry.

      Oh Pooh!
      Daddy found Me.

      Now it is my turn.
      I hide my eyes
      and count.
      the blows

      One, Two, Three, Four
      Please, Daddy, can I
      have some more?

      Five, Six, Seven, Eight
      Watch Daddy, I can
      bear my fate.

      Nine and Ten
      See Daddy
      No tears.
      I WIN!


Details | Free verse | |

I Was Born A Fairy Child

I was born a fairy child
I remember being born
from a dark  warm place
I was told to leave
and even though I said no
some other one said yes
Forces beyond my control 
made it so.

I sat on a beach I remember that
and my mother sat behind
and we waited for .....  I know not what.
but he came and my heart it leapt
as he sat down on the sand.
and made me feel full of him.

I remember pictures in the sand 
that he drew for me with a stick,
some things I didn't know,
but that was no matter, 
He was there  and he talked to me.
and I know that he mattered.
I'm told now he wrote my name
And I saw the sea rub  it out.

Then he wasn't round us anymore,
and my memories just not there. 
my mother says he once came back
before he went to war,
and I remember a train station
trains puffing steam and dirt
and being told goodbye,
mother says I said goodbye 
"goodbye uncle" I'm told I said.

I was a fairy child,
and these are fairy memories 
that I'm told I couldn't have. 
but they are there, 
and more besides
as I grew to fairy size.


Details | Free verse | |

My dad

My dad

My dad with his dark hair
Is in his room.
He is touching a Qur’an
And he is reading.
I am watching him
From the door.


Details | Free verse | |

Here's to the deadbeat dads

All these years at home, me and my momma alone
Daddy on the run, headed for the sun, he must of been..
Because I obviously wasn't his sunshine

Growing up wishing you were there when I had something to say
But now it's on pause, just like I am to write this
There's no more fightin' it, I hate you daddy
And I love writing it

All the love and hate will come out, I'll be spittin' **** you
And failure out of my mouth. And when I stop talkin'
I'll be in a craze, glaring at him
With my hate my hate and rage gaze

I'll kick up my feet, scuff dirt in his face
Tell him I put weed and lines of cocaine in his place
And enjoy the disgrace upon his face
And tell him that it's his fault for tappin' out in the first place

Left alone in this world of demons
Trying to find my halo in this crazy maze
Raising myself, daddy left
And mommas worrying about her ownself

Life ain't always a perfect song, it skips and studders
Fear, something nothing can cover
My will is what I discovered, feelings uncovered
She starts thinking and wonders

Here dad, I'm gonna use brain
Yeah, I'm a smart ass
Seventeen years later 
And I'm pouring my heart out, at last

Making it my point, I'm taking off my mask
Getting it off my chest, and laying these demons to rest

But **** me and the way I lived
Playing dirty and not letting my emotions show
Couldn't find mine
So I stole someone else's halo

But used it as a frisbee and chased it to hell
Spittin' cards now with cruela di'ville
And I know you're here too, in this fiery hell
I'll find you
And the corner in which you dwell
And when I find you asshole
You won't be slithering no more
I'll take off you're scales one by one
Make you the one who's coming undone

Scatter your ashes on hells front door
Bye daddy, now I'm the one who's leaving
I'll shut it, make sure I slam it
Throw in a **** you and god damn it

God sure damned us alright
But don't worry, I'll be sleeping tight
Nightmares at night, no more
I found my heart at my core

Survivin', tryin'
Leaving this life behind 
And one last thing to the guy
Calling himself my ****ing dad
I'm better than you
And bull*****if I'm gonna let you haunt my mind

End of rhyme, I'm the one
Peacin' out this time.


Details | Free verse | |

From Where Shall I Greatness Buy

Mom tells me to finish my homework quickly,
When I ask why?, she tells me
“You should become great as great as your dad”.
When I ask, where is my dad Mom?
She tells me, “He is now god’s guest.”
Again when I ask Mom, 
“Can I not become great by being the god’s guest”?
She slaps me gently and tells me, 
“Now just shut up and get your homework done”.
Little later when I ask she says, 
“Your Dad fought like a tiger, 
risking his life, he never bothered.
His gun has brought him greatness
and the honour of being the god’s guest.
Again when I ask, 
“Do people become great when they fight”?
If so, I will beat in the school, 
My friend Philip, with my might.”
Now, Mom calls me stupid and gives me a push.
Crying I go to sleep in her lap, 
Now she says, “Tomorrow I will 
give you pocket money for ice-cream”.
Wiping my eyes when I ask,
Mom! ”Can I by saving pocket money,
try greatness buy”?
Tell Mom, “From where shall I greatness buy”?
She tells, “Oh god help me”
and begins to cry.
 


Details | Free verse | |

The Dream Captured

A deep sleep guided me to the land of quizzical
Where the hallucination acted immortal as the souls from delusional
Those who ever filled the classic story of our time
Declared their presence in the shackles of uncertainty

I embraced my desire within
I found my anguish bloomed betwixt
I sank into the soul of crisis
Sensing the seconds of my fragility

Those lifeless souls grasp me there
Grasp depth as they would never be seen, again
A moment I was awakened from the dream
Along with the shadow which deserted to be fade

And the sense still there.. obscure...
My longing which buried by despair
Melting as the tears fell down
And let the dots of my dream be a dwelling place for my stained soul 

And let those retentions sealed in every pieces of the journey



Author's Note:
For the deceased beloved Father (November 13, 2002)
For the deceased beloved Sister (February 27, 2011)


Details | Free verse | |

My Greatest Work

He is my greatest work
like Christ who said
I come like a beggar.

He came to me like a child
wrapped in newspapers
on my front door step.

I took him into my home
and my life.

In the beginning
everything was new and fun
we played together like he 
was a puppy dog
big beautiful brown eyes
and he would get into trouble
but only minor ones.

As he grew his troubles
grew along with him.
Costing me more money and
time and loss of friends and family
who asked “why do you waste our time with him”
sleepless nights and heart pain and more pain
and more pain.

Doubts that I made a big mistakes
why do I think that I am god and
can save him or make myself the latest
911 hero.

For more than 16 years with him.
But one night I had a dream
a pale angel told me that
she needed me.

I was confused and shocked.
Why I am needed 
I am only human.
She said that she can not live without me
that she needed someone to believe in her
and have faith in her for her to do her work


Then I thought about him
my life's works has not been
in vain because like the angel and Christ
he needs someone to believe in him until
he can believe in himself
and know that he is also
God.




Details | Free verse | |

This is what i remember

 
This is what I  remember


something sits on my brain
a heavy pile of memories maybe
(lingering still)
freshly brewed strong coffee
mingling with last night's bouillon
the clangs of covers permeating the stillness
wools of sleep tangle the brows in obscure shadows

nothing seems to belong to the past anymore
like the yellow grin of tobacco and warm old arms, reaching
could it be that the youth in you disappeared into me when we embraced?
you know what i mean; laughter flying from your neck

patting my head as I lay, a grown woman on your lap
telling you of things I'd love but cannot seem to bring myself to have
and you smiled, that funny smile, closing your eyes
how drunk I felt laughing with you!
condensing my uncertainties to some foreign 'be well' feeling

and this is what I remember...
dimming lights and pleading eyes
your fingers to my lips gripping into my chest
ah, how I felt deserted then and now,
drowning into losing you

and then you surrendered 
just laid there and broke free
while it rained over my heart and all that was, sank
toppled over but never laid to rest

this is what I will not forget
as memories and loneliness swarm the nights of my days
and I yearn for the warmth of you








Details | Free verse | |

My story live and UNPLUGGED

When I am 90 I will look back and vaguely remember the clothes I wore, the car I drove or the house I lived in. I will reminisce about the places I went, the things I did, and the people I met along the way. My greatest fear is growing old. Not for vanity reasons...I am terrified of looking back and not having anything to show for my life. I will be 29 Tuesday and even just looking back now I only have one good thing that has come from my existence. I want to travel, to gain knowledge and wisdom. I want to be submerged in culture and diversity. I wish only to be open minded and well versed. 

When my father passed away almost 5 years ago, there were people in attendance at his service that I had never met before. Everyone celebrating his life because he had affected them in some way thoughout his time here. He was simple, country, no money...all he had was all he needed...his heart and his hands. That is my one true aspiration... I want to be like him. All I have ever wanted was, when the time came, to die knowing that I too had affected change in the life of atleast one person. Knowing that their life was fuller and brighter and even just a little bit easier because I was a part of it. I don't dream of fame and fortune... I dream of being the type of person my father wanted me to be. Compassionate and kind. I want to understand the world and life. I want to make a difference!


Details | Free verse | |

War Crimes

"Leave no man behind"
That was my first blood
I deserted him and left him on that island
Seventeen years later we found each other 
He held no grudge, one he had rights to
But he can't make me loathe myself any less

I left her with a Commander who was insane and cunning
No one knew the true scope until it was too late
Cast aside by the system and my inability... My instability
I may never recover that connection
Not sure I'm of worth

Finally, I found my comrade with one in tow
Even being there every day
I was unavailable, insufficient
And it hurt her in so many ways
Ways that will show in the battles and victories to come

A trial, no need.... Prison, my own warden
I can only hope to witness the coming events passively
I can hope to be invited to join their ranks once again
To be there, even if too late

The world forgets much
I cannot.... Will not.... Must not


Details | Free verse | |

My lovely dad

It’s with great difficulty I put my pen on this paper.
Struggling as to when and what to begin with.
Learning that life has its way of collapsing 
Our paths down to one: unchangeable, inescapable.
 
A journey of a thousand miles they say begin on a day.
But I guess they forgot to add that the journey also ends on a day.
What day, none of us have a clue.
Reminding me we might not have as much time as we think.

With my dad’s unexpected exit, my greatest solace
Was in the life he led, the testimonies people shared,
The numerous lives he shaped and the legacy he left.
Everyone that had the privilege of knowing him could attest to this.
He life was more of never let anybody leave you without getting better.
	
My dad was, like he will usually say, perfect to a fault.
He was a man that always stood on his integrity.
Even when everybody decided to take the wrong turn,
He remained true to his cause.

He had a unique way of lightening the atmosphere.
And always had the right word to say for every moment
He also helped in calming the storms in so many a lives
So much that there were no more closing hours
As to when visitors came in and out of the house.

His humility reminded of the personality of Jesus.
Spat upon, bared any brunt but never twitched a muscle
Some mistook this for mere weakness
But in it I saw the greatest strength many can’t attain.

He was a loving, caring, quintessential and inspiring dad.
He always believed in me even when I didn’t find any cause to.
He would normally tell me “I know you can do better”.
This nudged me to where I am today.

My dad also was also a lover of God which showed in selfless service to him.
He has been very instrumental in blessing the lives of many, of whom am chief.
Many of his teachings remain indelible in my heart.
We are brethren, what will you be remembered for, saving for the reigning day,
Just to mention a few, keep guiding me through the spontaneities of life.

I can’t help but remember his addiction to education.
He is the one that brought out the pen in me.
Always more than willing till you have caught on.
His love for reading and teaching
Had no level pegging which leaves me with satisfied incompetence.

It’s sickening that I have to pen all he was to me in a few pages.
What of the gifts he gave me, the support he gave me 
And the confidence I had just knowing I could fall back on him
Everyday had its unique and cherished story
Which book will be able to contain such a vast an experience
Just so painful such a journey had to end so soon.

When I consider the life after death
And the rewards that follow for every works done here
Am sure my dad is wreathing in smiles as he accepts his awards.
Giving me a joyous longing of being there one day

I have learned a lot from my dad’s life.
There are always those that will hate and be jealous of you, no matter how good you are.
There are those that will take pleasure on riding on you and would compel you to go a mile
But we should be prepared to go twain.
And the greatest life is a life of sacrifice.

Now I know that true success does not depend on the length of days.
Seeing the shoes my dad left behind just makes me scared.
Am so proud to be your son and I couldn’t have asked for any better.
I hope someday my feet would be worthy to fit in.
To me you are still very much around because you still live deep within my heart.


Details | Free verse | |

The Challenge

We all lined up for the schools big race,
Each boy wanting to show his Dad he was the best,
I had no Dad to run for, I just followed all the rest.

I ran and ran, trying to keep up to stay there with the pack,
If I fell and failed again, each one would turn their back,
On the kid with spec's who dared to run the race,
To show the world he was no disgrace.

No Dad at home and no Mum's love,
In a house that echoed with emptiness,
I needed to run and hope to win, maybe just a place,
Forget the loveless life I had, I just hated the disgrace.

They had a Dad, They had a Mum,
To them that was no big thing,
Just to have a hug and maybe a kiss,
To me meant everything.

To win the race was my big dream, so I tried my very best,
I ran and ran, my lungs on fire, burned hotly in my breast,
I tripped and fell, I hit the ground, in shame for all to see,
When I rose to run, the race was won, by a better boy than me.

I walked away, no pat on the back,
No well done call for me
I tried and failed one more time,
It was nothing new to me.

Years of struggle were to be my lot, 
Until I found my wife,
She gave me hope to carry on, 
Through many years of strife.

I finally won my race through life and took the trophy home.
The race I ran was hard my friend, and now I know just why,
I had to fall and rise again, just like my Savior did,
He took the scorn and felt the whip in a far worse way than I.

Just think, each time you fall,and life seems hard to bear,
Remember your Father up above, He is always there.
So do your best no matter how hard it may be,
Our Lord will always be at your side to beat the enemy.

So when the day seems hard to face, 
To do your best is no disgrace.
God will bless you every day,
He will give you the victory.

Remember this poem when you feel small, 
Listen to the Fathers call,
To win the prize you must get up, 
Each and every time you fall.

© Dave Timperley 2012








 






Details | Free verse | |

Why I Write Poetries Part 1

She was an Indian Barbie, long curly lash 
And brown complexion. The hair was 
Perfect, shiny black and she had on a small 
Pink gown to cover her 36-24-36 body. 
Last seen, she still had on her high heeled shoes.

Oh how my daughter cried, “Dolly, Dolly, 
Where are you?” when she found out she left, 
It on the basketball court’s grounds. She took
It along, against her mom’s frequent reminders,
When grandpa brought her with him for a walk. 

She cried horribly, my wife mailed me. Tears 
Rolling down her cheeks even as her mother 
Scolds, tears not for the accusatory words 
But for her Dolly who is gone. Gone away,
Lost and probably in another child’s hands. 

My wife, with a guilt ridden grandpa’s idea,
Told her Dolly wasn’t lost after all. In fact 
She was on her dolly way to dad now who
Works onboard a ship, sailing far, far away 
So he can buy milk and nappies for small kids.

“Punta sya dun kasi lungkot si Daddy di ba?” 
(She went there because Dad is lonely right?)
She asks in between sobs of her mom, who 
Can only nod and kiss her on the forehead
And whisper a “Yes,” the whitest of white 
Lies meant to comfort a grieving, sad child. 

Fast forward to the time I talked to my child
On a long distance call, from a very public booth.
She asked me if Dolly was with me, forewarned, 
I can only sigh a cheerful aye. “Talaga? tignan ko nga!”
(Oh yeah? Let me see her then!) 
Of course she must have meant to talk to her.

I didn’t hesitate, all so suddenly I knew what to do,
Then and there I belted a falsetto, uncaring 
Of the Island people around me, for in that one
Sparkling moment, I was talking to my child not as 
A father but as a long lost friend who misses her.

“HAH! Helloooo Dolly, andyan ka sa barko ni Daddy?”
(Hello Dolly, are you there on Daddy’s ship?)
She asks me after my high pitched hello, asking 
with such gasped longing, with such breathless relief, 
with such childlike delight and innocence. Even as  
Eavesdroppers wonder what harm befell my balls!

The rest of that dreamy conversation is lost to me now.
The wonder of her tone, her concern, her yearning for 
Her doll is all that remains, of the father and daughter
Transcending bounds of love, blasting colors and
Rainbows to a gray span of reality, even for a while.
---Part 2 on my poem list please read too long to post


Details | Free verse | |

A Father And Dyslexia

Daddy, your bed time stories were the best.
The extra prescision you took while reading a book,
To overcome your struggles and ensure you pronounced each word correctly,
Were the most beautiful sounds.
The way you would sit and practice slowly, 
Sometimes repeating words out loud or to yourself,
In efforts meant to bring our sleepy ears an image written down.
They were always the most beautiful words Daddy.
They were the best stories, that I lay in bed,
An adult now, and listen to my memories, where you retell them again.
You stuttered - it mattered not.
No other stories compare.


Details | Free verse | |

Beyond You

When you broke me
I never expected to be fixed
Many felt I was beyond repair
I was tossed upon a heap of lonely souls
Drifting out to sea
Discarded
Forgotten
Silent amidst my hollow dreams
Still I was set free
Free from you
For once able to breath
A hand held out lifted me up
A new world was revealed
Substance
Hope
Friendship
Realization of what life could be
Confidence in a new reality 
Someone could see the value of me
No longer lost
Heading towards hope
Elevated to the stars
Dreams no longer out of reach
I am not broken any more
Your predictions did not come true
I thank God he helped me 
I'm living a life 
far beyond the restraints of you
I listened to those lies spoken in my ear
Felt each word pierce my broken heart
Still some echos remain
But they are drowned by a stronger voice
And so I have learned to believe 
My soul is refreshed and relieved
Part of me wishes that you could see
Sadly I know
You will never see the restored essence of me




Details | Free verse | |

Bully

You torture me every day
With your words
You leave me in agonizing pain
Wondering
What did I do WRONG?
Do I really deserve your cruel words?
Does anybody?
You said things to me
That no parent should ever say to their child
That I wouldn’t say to even my enemy
Why do you bully?
Does it make you feel cool
To make me feel like a loser?
Does it make you feel ten feet tall 
To make me feel like I’m only ten inches?
You have no power
Unless I give it to you
But I do
I’m afraid
Afraid of you


Details | Free verse | |

Schoolyard Bragging Rights

Oh ya ,well my mom makes better apple pie
Really,well my mom makes brownies 
With peacans and chocolate icing
Thats nothing, my mom sewed me this new sweater from scratch
Well my Dad can fix my bike anytime it breaks,
My Dad sells bikes and got mine for free
A hush,
My Dad left when i was 3, no bike for me.


Details | Free verse | |

A battered old saucepan

It may seem strange to write about a battered old saucepan
but this was no ordinary one 
it sprung a leak the other day
sadly without thinking
I threw it away
and now it's gone.

It had been in my family
before I was born
and it was used every day
it broke my heart after
to throw it away.

For all the delicious soups goulash and past
it had contained
the mouth watering delectable smells
from the kitchen
the shouts from my parents

''Come on now set the table dinners made''.

All the red hot broths and porridge we'd scoff
before school on a winters day
all the laughs tears and conversations around
the dinner table before it was was washed
and put away.

It was more than a simple saucepan
because it held a lot of family memories
now my parents sadly passed away
it was one of the last things to remind me
of how things used to be
and mow I have to buy a new one
and accept it's demise
like my family
it's gone forever.

Peter Dome.copyright.2012.


Details | Free verse | |

As Blind the Moon

Dad sharpened a blade of word
So that it was as sharp as a knife
Mother then open the chest
Until naked like the moon
"Stab the knife!" dad said

I dare not imagine
Blind both eyes of the moon
While night said
Journey still more circular
Even including the dream
Which for me in the form of the blades of walls 
Form a box traps me, huddled
In it, whole time towards morning without
Managed to find a gap like the door was
Since childhood

"Stab the knife!" dad said
When I began to laugh with a mischievous
Imagining the moon began to blind
One of its eye

Mother's chest perfectly naked
And dad stay only one side of the walls
That continues melted

12/25/2012


Details | Free verse | |

Reflections on a flyover for my Dad at Arlington

Above the clouds in many splendored hues of blue and white
    This view beheld by an honored and rarest few

A nations treasure lies below in marble and in green
    Yet no dome or obelisk could ever be this hallowed

Like a great bird it claws across the sky
    A meeting calls: a friend in need

Its mighty engines crash through the silent morning sky
    Its shrieks but music to all who know and remember well

The many come to take her place are fallen
    This Daedalus lives on to tell their tales and more

Through younger eyes she gleamed in sun drenched silvers high above the clouds
    Now bathed in grays she lingers on to battles unimagined in her youth

Lightened of the tools of war her peaceful mission now to do
    She’s come to pay her last respects

And as she dipped and turned away
    A sweet release and something more

A soul was taken from this world
    And carried to the arms of God

© 2014 by Craig McAlister

Flyover by B-52H serial 0060 "Iron Butterfly" at Arlington National Cemetery on January 7, 2008.


Details | Free verse | |

The New God

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart beats out of your chest
Ready to consume the final climax
I know who you are - when the lyrics fail to resemble
Letting your poison drip straight from your lips
Portraying, entertaining the image of sex's delusion
You know only rape - manifestation of hate
Lack of the fruit of the beauty of a human mind
Depths you'll never penetrate!

She was only a doll - type of a lost father's adore
Impaled into a desperate whore
Shamefully out of broken safety's  choice 
She bore embryogenesis of morose
May your rusty blades caress as they please

So confront the masses with the halt of embryogenesis
Let the worship of machines be
Leg them construct us cell to cell
Nature's just in the way
Of our race of perfectly engineered machines!
The burden of conception
Surrenders to the will of
The New God
   


Details | Free verse | |

My list


My dreams belong in a book.
I don't want to leave this world 
with my pages unfilled.
I'll never give up what I long for.
Knowing who my parents are?
My list hold only one need. 
then I die.


Details | Free verse | |

Just Men

Yes I bow my head low sometimes I even cry. 
I shake my head and wonder how much more can I bear. 
If I really express myself who would care? I’ve heard statements,” You’re a man.” True
enough, I’m also human. Yes we do at times take things for granted. Perfection isn’t a part of my DNA.
My thoughts are mixed up; I know that I am a man. 
A man with struggles.
I once thought I was loved but was betrayed. 
I gave and gave and yet parts of my life was stolen. 
I listened and embraced sweet kisses and was shrugged off like I was a no body; to others that I thought actually loved me.
I’ve been beaten. 
Look at my scars. Not only physically also mentally. It hurts to walk with my chest out sometimes. Its called pride, having this self image of a man. 
Generally speaking, we feel the pain too. 
We are fathers, brothers, sons, and husbands. We sometimes lack the compassion and we are men with mistakes and a past that no one can judge us. 
Still in need of love and understanding. 
So women don’t look down on all of us, we do try. We love, hurt, cry, and die trying because we are just men.


Details | Free verse | |

That's Where The Lord Lives

I walk outside to see all that I can see.
Over there is our house, our home,
In the distance, you can see.
And that place of hallowed happiness
Forever has been our home
And forever will be so evermore.
That house is small but raised us tall,
From the perfect parents who loved us so
To the perfect sister for which every man would want.
The house built us all up strong.
More than a mere building,
It is a place to love and be loved,
A place that hands you hope that you give right back, 
And a place of everlasting faith.
This home is where my parents taught me about God
And opened me up to Jesus.
They opened the eyes of the blind for all to see,
And the blind included me.
They taught me to be the best I can be;
The best things in life are free.
They have taught us so well,
And they all have saved my soul.
Even if I am not there now,
I carry Him with me.
I carry them with me.
I carry Their values and Their teachings with me.
In this house, this home,
We reside.
We cannot forget this.
This is where my Mother lives.
This is where my Father lives.
This is where my Sister lives.
This is where We live,
In this loving, caring, beautiful home
They made just for us.
We cannot forget this either.
This is where it all began. 
This is where the hunger and thirst was created;
This is where we are fulfilled.
We cannot, we must not forget this:
This is where God lives.
This is where Jesus lives.
This is where The Lord lives;
The Father and The Almighty.
This is where We live;
This is where We reside.
We must not forget this.
We must not forget this:
What a beautiful and perfect life this is.


Details | Free verse | |

FREE CEE sharing a park bench quietly

   SHARING A PARK BENCH QUIETLY

Oh that?
That’s a relic representing recollections my mother’s had for years
A creation carved with creativity and counted among her most cherished possessions
It was designed during many consecrated conversations and sanctified sessions
Her husband, my dad, had worked on it as days fell into weeks
And weeks collided with months

When I was very young Mom would sometimes sit me on the couch and crouch to tell me a story
The tale etched into that relic with initials, symbols and most importantly love
Because that’s what mom and dad had the most of
Mom would describe to me with urgency and a smile what the cherub on the upper left hand corner represented for a loving pair
It was there to savor their security and ensure longevity so rare
No one in my family cared much for brevity to dare
But rather held sacred was the mortar of love with which they were cemented
And then she pointed to the apartment number they as newlyweds had rented
There was a pair of doves to promise ever blue for a union of two who truly were not one without the other
It does a son’s heart good to learn of how his father first met his mother
The story says they met in a park during a rainstorm and that’s the reason on the relic is a rain drenched tablecloth upon a picnic table
My dad did so much more than most are able
There are no hearts carved to be seen on the relic because only the two of their hearts mattered
Dad had, as well, taken the time to carve a story with silence about the soulfulness and brightness of his wife and my mom was truly flattered
It’s a beautiful relic and it’s also a reminder that being together, for them, meant for always
And in always
Aiming always for a million or more days
Yes, for my whole life that relic has hung upon that very same wall
Oh but now due to delirium and dementia mom doesn’t recognize nor recall that lovely relic at all
© 2012…..PHREEPOETREE ~free cee!~




]





Details | Free verse | |

Gone

A golden brown wooden fence Made by the hands of my dad Trimmed dark green bushes Leaned amongst the borders Encompassing the many colors Bright reds, Dark purples And mellow yellows And best of all A small tree Able to be seen even From the window Of my bedroom Passerby’s usually commented “What a beautiful garden” On a city street, outside a bus stop Beautiful yards were not common Hot days while my dad watered the garden I would sit on the porch With my twin sister One day a channel 11 newscaster passed by Asked my dad what he was doing on this hot day Said watering the flowers and spending time with his daughters She asked how old we were Said we were six Lady then asked us do you ever say anything at the same time And we replied no At the same time This made the newscaster laugh Fourteen years later Still reside on that same city street Same bus passes up and down Same passerby’s walk the street No one admires the garden anymore Passerby’s use our yard as an ashtray Maybe because it looks like a graveyard The golden brown wooden fence is not there Looking outside my bedroom window I can no longer see the tree I can no longer see Bright reds, Dark purples, and mellow yellows I am stuck seeing dead grass and cigarette buds So I planted morning glory flowers Hoping to bring the beauty that was lost And bring back the unity and love This yard showed This yard didn’t always fit the stereotype My dad didn’t always fit the stereotype I didn’t always fit the stereotype And Neither did my mom or my sister


Details | Free verse | |

MISTY BLUE

MISTY BLUE
Uncle Eddie retrieves his groceries. He is tall and abreast to his lineage. He honors family and all his people through his insight as well as his intelligence. Not blind or blindsided from who seeks his temple, eventually, the pilfer will fail. Uncle Eddie is not one to cozen with. His feet are afflicted; nonetheless, he is a strong man. His soul and spirit will be restored. The thieves are no longer in the temple of God. How great thou are! _________________________________| PENNED ON AUGUST 23, 2014!


Details | Free verse | |

The Tower Fell

I remember the Busch can tower in the corner of the room;

We made the trash in our lives a game.

I remember the wasp nest strangling the ceiling,

the rusting walls of the trailer house, the light

that wouldn't shine through.

Lightning struck the heart of a broken home,

as hill country winds threatened to take 

me away.

I remember the anger in your eyes,

as you ran my horse down,

to teach it a lesson.

"She's gotta be broke son." 

I remember how you sauntered,

cradling your ribs after being kicked off 

that bull.

Drunk, 

Nowhere. 

I wish I remembered more,

I wish I could remember the sound 

of your voice,

or the things you would say.

But all I can hear,

is the faint buzz

of a wasp nest;

Xena Warrior Princess,

just out of tune,

Crackling.

Echoes of thunder claps,

the tower falling.



-James Kelley 2014, All Rights Reserved.


Details | Free verse | |

ANGRY AT MY DEADBEAT DAD

TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER?!?!
 You said that on a million yesterdays!
 Look at the calendar, it’s laughing at you.
 Dude, are you SERIOUS?!
 You should dress up like a “Father” on Halloween!
 You can’t see through that old mask anymore.
 I must still look like a little girl to you,
 the crying five-year-old you forgot to pick-up from school,
 the hopeful eight-year-old you promised that you'd be right back….
Don’t you know?!
 All of those seasons, all of those missed moments,
 all of the times that Father Time ticked me off,
 placed a “no vacancy” sign across my heart and
 brought me to this sad reality:
 You laid down and made me,
 but never stood up and raised me.
 So, take your bull****, all of that lying ****,
 that tomorrow will be better ****,
 and make your grass greener
 for Easter and
 on the other damn side.
 Hallmark should make a
 Deadbeat Dad card.
 Until then, 
 I'M NOT BUYING IT!


Details | Free verse | |

Winter's bright

Attached to mine paw,
his
twice

As his smile lit the winter's
bright


Details | Free verse | |

15

I'm still wearing the
red lusted lipstick he hates
as I try to explain that
it's impossible to
wash this disease away.
My father says I'm
a picture of teenage cliches,
mourning puppy love
as if it is something tangible, 
him, always one to rip
the band aid from the wound, 
quick and with only the 
slightest sting of nostalgia.
He wonders why he was cursed
with the mass of emotions
bleeding before him.
"It's later than midnight..." he says,
but they are everywhere,
dampening my hair,
flailing into my mouth
already creasing into 
the laugh lines and 
fleeting moments of yesterday.
My father wanted the boy,
five years younger and 
dead before born
but all he got
was this:
frayed heart and torn jeans,
sheet stains from two kinds of
melted foundations,
the moist aftermath that I will
swallow in sleep, as the
constant question marks
adorn his face.


Details | Free verse | |

Tomorrow

Oh those candies behind the counter
They look so good
Just out of my reach
I imagine 
My mouth waters
You say maybe tomorrow 

Oh that bike
High handle bars
Banana seat
Just like my friends bike
So very different from my own
My tomorrow never comes

Oh those boots
The smell and feel of the leather
Check out the stitching
Those pointed toes
If only I could wear them tomorrow 

Oh all the things I want
All just out of my reach
Left for you to decide
Your desires satisfied
Mine set aside
You say maybe tomorrow 

Oh I can hardly wait
One day I will grow up
The world will be my oyster
I will decide
I will have my tomorrow 

Oh he is so cute
This gorgeous son of mine
I want the best for him
I can wait for me
I'll give my best today
I can wait till tomorrow 


Details | Free verse | |

Daddy

Daddy, 
I'd like to take a trip to the airport with you and fly one more time. 
Eat fish tacos with you. 
Talk about real estate with you. 
Ask you about that time you "wrote a blank check" and believed God for a miracle. 
Tell you how much you impacted my life in so many ways. 
Tell you how I miss our early morning phone conversations. 
Borrow your truck for the weekend, because yours were always cooler than mine . 
Cook you breakfast and a make you a big ole chocolate pie. 
You always got me, you always knew when I needed to hear from you and when I needed a smile and encouragement. 
I hope I showed you enough how much I loved you. 
I hope you know, even though you're gone. 
I love you. 
Happy Father's Day.


Details | Free verse | |

I Hoped

I hoped
I really really hoped
By now that you'd pick up the phone
Or show up at my door
But there's someone you want a little bit more

Days and nights go by
Staying strong is hard but I try
Reminders pop up in every day life
But still I keep busy and strong, I try

So many moments I've never had
I'll never get to experience with dad
Basic anatomy connected us at first
You ignored all that and rolled me in the dirt

Downhill I fell and fell and fell
You made me cry many times and I yelled
Your heads made of brick
My hearts made of sticks
Your abuse burned my love down
You hallowed the insides of this chick

Been ten years now, I've rolled back up the hill
Been a struggle, but life now is pretty chill
I wont pretend that I don't think of you
Miss having someone there because I do
Honestly I never did feel that you cared
That bottle always came first and it was more than I could bare

Being me is something I learned to do
Something that wouldn't have happened if I stuck with you. 






Details | Free verse | |

My Father's Story

Living a life without a father
You may think no one bother
The hurt and pain in his eyes
Nothing he had but goodbyes
He spent his years of life asking why 
Did he not come back or swung by 
No one to look up to 
No guidance on what to do 
Closest to a father was a gang banger
Didn't do him good but use him as a hanger
Made him do the bad deed
Wasn't important to him more than a seed
But he tried and tried to make him proud
But all he did was shout at him out loud
Finally giving up on the bad choices 
He began listening to those voices
He found a one of a kind girl
Who always made his mind whirl
He mad her his
And they had a kid
That was the day his life turned around
His destiny was found
He now realizes that he came to a decision
He's not going to be the day we see on television
But the dad he never had
The dad that will never make his child sad.


Details | Free verse | |

Final Day 3-1-02

The phone had us on our feet
   In the middle of the night. 
It was Dennis, “Dad just passed…”
   We each made calls and gathered
So we could go tell Mom together.  

Were his organs riddled with cancer?
   Was it diabetes, or was it his heart?
They all had played a part.

We carried Mom to see her Beau
  Held her by the hand with tissues
For us all and started final plans.
   Made calls. Signed papers.
….And looked for Morris.

Maybe he needed privacy.
   Everyone has a different way
Of handling their grief.
   We found him at the empty bed
Dad’s pillow at his face.

His scent lingered in the linens
   Giving one chance to remember
Something we had long forgotten—
   Something natural and tender
Links a parent and a child


Details | Free verse | |

LET ME SLEEP

I sleep so can I dream

to find me in a world I can be

to play with my dad while

My mom waits for me

with several cups of tea

Distant relations I not even know

Childhood friends forgotten long ago

tug along and raise a lot of cheer

I find myself cocooned

in the midst of near and dear

God wakes me to the reality of hell

O’ No! I want to sleep for ever

and stay in my happy dreams

As I stand near the grave

I shoo away the birds around

My dad is dreaming deep inside

Leave me at peace, let me sleep


Details | Free verse | |

A Real Father

Any guy can have a child
But it takes a real man to be a father
Any guy can get annoyed
But a real man don't get bothered
Any guy can give money for his kids
But a real man is there for them
Any guy can work all the time
But a real man is takes care of her or him
Any guy can justify his position
But a real man proves his spot
Any guy can get upset with kids
But a real man never gets hot
Any guy can talk whatever
But a real man goes with the transaction
Any guy can buy stuff for their kids
But a real man's love is out of action
So many guys nowadays fall
But real men step up to the call


Details | Free verse | |

J W

Jonathon Winters 
I almost cried 
He was the best 
He made me laugh 
The loudest and the 
Longest


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not A Cult

It's not a cult:
It's a Savior saving my life.
It's a Savior saving your life.
It's our Savior saving our lives.
It's not too late.
It's never too late!


Details | Free verse | |

Shallow Inkwell

Sadly, I have only the one shallow inkwell to enter words
About my adoring father’s incomparable life.  And, 
Webster’s entire dictionary is not enough to
Even describe a day of his existence.  How on 
This extremely small earth can it be accomplished?  My
Attempts come up short every time I dip in shallow inkwells. 

Maybe I can exist for a time as his apparent duplicate,
Even though, at best, I’ll portray a foggy impression.
Hurry, I better accelerate; he is fading as quickly 
As the inkwell.  Now, I can’t envision dad’s outline,
To imitate.  Sorry it concluded in this utter letdown.
Our shallow inkwell has emptied; his immortality has expired.

Now I’ll face a fruitless eternity to accomplish comparisons.

For Con/Vow contest


Details | Free verse | |

Mamas Boy Oh Boy

Why Are You So Hurt
Can I explain today is a difference day,
But the same old excused.
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
Rudy to in conscience to ,
Just pick up my food I have hard day well.
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
To day you was suppose to pay the bills,
But instead you state in bed in till twelve.
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
It’s our anniversary you forgot to make reservation,
And you don’t even open the door or bring flowers any more.
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
When we first meet it was hard to see through the blur lines,
Or was everything you told me from the start all lies.
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
Mom Why Are So Hurt Cause I Can See IT In Your Eyes,
I Guess I Am The Man Of The House At Such A Young Age,
“Why Are You So Hurt”,
I wonder who can related, young brother young brother no
Matter your race, age ,origin, or creed I consider you my young brother
I’m not a man lacking wood but would like here my story.
Mama’s Boy, Oh Boy!!!


Details | Free verse | |

Dear soldier hero

Dear Soldier hero
   Dear soldier hero,
I address you with a prayer just for you. 
I tell God to keep you safe, so you can give me my freedom.
I thank you and all the heroes that have to fight each night.
I cry for you as I pray and ask God to send you home.
You're my hero Daddy And i love you
            Love johnny


Details | Free verse | |

The wicket-keeper

A lover I once knew, die today
he was alive yesterday
I never thought of him this way.
I never think about the rain 
Unless it flood my drains,
my driveway, my rose garden 
Or dampened my happy mood

Why would the death of my lover
Leave me so sad, and blue
Tender moment of affection: edgy days

Relationships have it up and downs
The past have been trouble: maybe I was wrong, 
Probably he was right: however here tonight

A lover I once knew passed away today
My old lover the wicket-keeper: 
The one I uses to love the most: an distant lover


Details | Free verse | |

Dear God

Dear God, If I could have a Christmas wish It would be of a selfless gift. A wish full of love, hope and faith. That one day my dad is saved. His lungs are shutting down by the day And his liver is toast you see. His skin is a yellowish color And he has lost a lot of weight. I understand he did this to himself, But please lord I need your help. Surrounded by candles on this night He is too weak to continue to fight. I can see the pain in his eyes. The look of hopelessness he is trying to hide. Please lord do you hear my cry? For my dad to survive, If I could have a Christmas wish It would be for my dad to live.


Details | Free verse | |

A Son at War

From “Daily Given & Other Poems”

God be with thee, my beloved son – God be with thee
Until you return.

Many treacherous there be
Before to reach friends and daddies
But all of them are going to wait for the same sun’s light.
There shall not be farewell or a yellow ribbon or blue
And there cannot tears from us just smile behind the whole life into taken.

Alas! I can see you as a son at war
Working in a height way and honor.

All shall reach thee.

God be with thee, my beloved son – God be with thee
As the last fading from a lovely cactus! 


Details | Free verse | |

Grow Up

My Barbie dolls are growing old.
My first bike is growing rusty.
My little shoes now pinch my toes
and carry big boxes with ease.
I can reach the cupboards,
and I've learnt how to blow my nose.
I read long books by myself,
and can count by twelve.
I walk to the bus alone now,
Without holding hands.
I eat all my vegtables without being told,
And I've learned how to spell 'hundred'.
My legs may reach farther,
and I may walk longer,
but I will always stay close.
I will always be your little girl.
Always need you.
You will always be my family.
My mother, my father.
Always.


Details | Free verse | |

A Dad In The Past

He asks me all the time
Mom why did you leave dad behind
I told him it was never the plan but, you dad is not ready to be a real man
Like attend doctor's appointment or take you to the park
Or a trip to the beach to play in the sand
Or make trips in your room to turn on the night light because your scared of the dark
On Christmas and birthdays no cards or no toys
But the worst part of it all you never even call and when you do your a lying fool
Making promises that you know you will break
How much more do you think we can take
So I'm ending this now for my son's sake
Your a dad in the past and your lies were a blast


Details | Free verse | |

The Sweetest Dad Ever!

The Sweetest Dad Ever!
When I was just a lass,
my teacher pulled me out of English class
to get a dozen of the pinkest roses in a vase made of brass.
They must have cost him an awful lot of cash,
but my Dad said Happy Valentine’s Day To My Favorite Blonde Lass!


Details | Free verse | |

On my father's life

Woke up and read 
“On My Father’s Life”
by Raymond Carver.
Thought about Kentucky
and Dad with his shirt off,
sweating in a chilly morning
of March, digging
for a fence post.
The poor bastard,
to share a name
and lose a photograph.

It's seems like I've
lost something too.
My father isn’t dead 
to space, but it’s been years.
And to share a name,
after all this time.
It's all he has share.


Details | Free verse | |

DAD

Dad,
Whoa, where should I start?
Is it to say am grateful,
For all that you have done?
Or is to say I love you,
And I forever shall.

You have been,
A pillar in my life,
That peg that covered up the hole in the wall,
Walls of my heart that were cracked and teared up.

You have instilled discipline in the kindest of ways,
Been the silver lining in the clouds of my days.
You have shown me that love doesn't have to be proven,
Flashed about like a trophy to show that its there,
But that even the slightest of pats,
And shortest of words,
Can show that you care.

You may not say as much as I want you to,
Nor do what they say you should,
But that doesn't mean that I love you less,
Because to me you are simply the best.
And as long as the tune of life plays,
I shall forever have this dance with you,
No one could ever take your place,
My father, my mentor,
My disciplinary, my true friend.
I LOVE YOU DAD.


Details | Free verse | |

The Raggedy Man

The longing to go back,
Back to another time
Another place
I’m aging, and he doesn't care
A different crime
He can run
He can hide
He can he can soar
He can fly
Away in the 
Blue box
I don’t have one
I don’t have a police box
I’m all alone 
I’m stuck here watching every dawn 
I’m stuck here like mom
He won’t take me away
Because he left us you see
Alone to fend for ourselves
And I hate him for it
But at the same time I love him
My mom’s raggedy man.


Details | Free verse | |

Those who death steals from

At the breaking of the new dawn
Where the hopeful golden glow melts the dew
A sleepy world awakens to the brightened new dawn of life
But at the striking of that aged light
Where the anguished reddened heat squanders dew
I die a thousand deaths
Knowing that tomorrow I will die a thousand more
And every day thereafter as the sands of my hour glass quickly trickle with each sighing breath

A path once known now wisps of smoke
A path once comforted by the soft colours of a palette of petals
Now shrouded in jagged sculptures of flesh and blood and soul
A path upon which defiant footprints once spoke loudly of living
Now a path imprinted with the silent screams of a ragged form, noosed 
And brutally dragged in death’s merciless dark wake

A spirit once free
Now sentenced and shackled to the imperceptible chains of pain
Hands still young now wrinkled with the hauntings of death’s cold pallor
Arms once strong now weakened at the remembrance of the weight of the lost
	
And a face unrecognisable masked by raging war
Mirroring an imploding core 

The day’s heat savages the charred flesh stretched over decrepit bones
The hollow cavity where a heart once beat humming the melancholy call for the pieces of its once whole inhabitant
A yearning soul’s agonising pleas falling on deaf ears
In frantic search of the fast fading, scarred scattered remains
Of what once was
And what will never again be

And as the day breathes its final breath and the orange glow begins to sink, a silky cloak with glistening jewels envelopes the world in peace
But with the rise of the cause of the pained wolf howl
The shadow of the demonic orb of devastation descends
Its arms outstretched, spreading suffocation
Its spindly blood drenched fingers piercing that empty hollow where a heart once beat

And as my broken barely human form turns, collapsing to my knees into fading air, where familiar loving arms once stood tall
Now unjustly only dust in the pine box cradled between my palms
The fires of my hell encircle me
And falling ashes rain upon me as the heavens mourn you falling asleep
Another of death’s cruelly stolen souls	
Wrenched from my fingertips-abandoning me forever

And the dawn of realisation opens its jaws and revels in the manic scream that escapes me-the echoes of my tortured soul

A soul who must remain

And there I die a thousand deaths
Knowing that tomorrow I will die a thousand more
And every night thereafter as the sands of my hour glass quickly trickle
with each sighing breath


Details | Free verse | |

Pa Pa

It was never right, never right
any more than like the cheap garden
in which I grew up like a weed
poor and brown for eighteen years
hardly wishing to breathe

Daddy you tried to kill me
but you died before you had time
baskets full of stone, a bag full without God,
Ghastly face with one double chin
Big as a hang mans rope.

There were a dozen or more homes
So I never could tell where we lived
put your roots or you fat feet,
You never could talk to me
Your tongue stuck in your throat.

You have always frighten me
with your fat belly and yellow teeth
with no neat mustache
and those Aryan eye, bright blue,
Thief and robber of the family.

You stand at the gum machines
father, in the picture I know of you
That double chin and large feet
No less the devil, no one any
less than a onyx man who

Bit my pretty blonde hair in two.
My red heart grew then they buried you
At twenty I tried to kill myself
and get away, away, away from you.
I thought even just my bones enough.

They pulled me out the grave
And put me back together with glue
Then I knew what to do.
I imitated you, a woman with
a belly and fowl mouth.


Details | Free verse | |

The Forgotten Heroes

The chill of morning sweeps the streets of Whitehall.
Rain falls like tears from the sky onto the Cenotaph stone.
I fear the sight of his name, should the pain make me fall,
Amongst the crowd I stand here alone

No loving words to give me hope,
No letterbox clatter with joy renew.
So in memories past I sit and study,
The pain of loss is deep for you.


As I lay here in the silence, I wonder how much father knows,
About this nightmare and the darkness that surrounds me.
These are the demons that haunt my mind,
Longing for death to set me free.


No 10 gun salute to make my father proud.
Death has taken my ID tag, my title and my name.
Would my father disown me?
The thought drives me insane!



In the deafening silence,
I cling on as hope slips away.
No news of my son,
Tortures every day.

I hear his voice in the darkness of night,
His image floats above my bed.
The boy I sent off to make me proud,
Does he lie among the unknown dead?



My senses are shattered, body battered, my sight is gone,
My head drums out an S. O. S thumping on death’s door.
If only a loving touch could soothe me,
Oh, to see my father once more!

To be able to look upon your face,
To be a family once more.
When we have always been true and faithful,
Why must God allow the horror of war!
OH PLEASE GOD!
Oh please God!


Details | Free verse | |

Delusion of Granduer

That person is thinking about me
They probably think I'm a Movie Star
I get that a lot
Is their Heart pumping fast?
Perhaps it's skipped a beat
If I said hello it would really make their day
I have always had a strange power over people
It must be the way I carry myself
Some people are just born this way
Natural leaders
I know they will be talking about me
Wondering about my life
The people I have met
The places I have been
It's like they have magically seen my future 
It is only a matter of time
They will not soon forget this day
Should I tell them my name?
No, why should I spoil the surprise
This moment will stay in their minds eye
They will tell their children of this day
Of course I will not think of them again
I will walk in new rooms and eyes will turn my direction
They will not be dissapointed
I will let them taste my dreams
They will live their dreams through me
They will want to be me
It is just a matter of time
The whole world will one day chant my name
I look forward to that day
My gift will be their gift
It's just a matter of time


I grew up expecting great things from my Father and instead of doing 
them he lived in his perpetual fantasy World.


Details | Free verse | |

Treasure

Dad and I dug
for treasure
in the backyard.
My eyes lit up at
the can opener,
it glimmered silver in the earth-
except for the rusty parts.

He made another hole
by the white tree
and I polished off
the rock, that was
so smooth-
except where it was rough.

In the rubble at the bottom,
I found a penny caked in dirt,
so old,
it must have been worth
a fortune.


Details | Free verse | |

The things he hates most

Since he was a young boy
he has hated nothing.
Nothing but three things.

Spindles.
Dolls.
Hourglasses.

Spindles. 
All that spinning makes him dizzy.

Dolls.
Childish things for childish people.

Hourglasses.
Why don't you use a clock like a normal person?


“Why the hatred?”
You may ask.


His father was a doll-maker.
And he made one every hour.


Details | Free verse | |

Soul of Regret

I saw the picture of you
With Mom and dad 
And you were smiling
	And bells were ringing
And dad was holding you 

	He called your name
	The night he died
	And was scared  
	He would never 
	See you again.
	
	And now he comes 
	In your dreams
	When your soul 
	Needs you the most
	And you wonder if the dead can talk

	And if souls get lonely
	And believe they are okay
	And love other souls
	Like they want to be loved
	Even when they can’t love back

	Can you blame him
	For wanting to give comfort 
	When your soul is not free
	And your own death 
	Means nothing to you.

	And now he sits by the door 
	And waits for you to cry in your sleep
	And tries to understand why
	He didn’t hold you
	When he could.


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Dad

Dear Dad,

im saying good bye to you since you dont care

im saying goodbye to you because honestly you just werent there

im tired of trying to win your affection

im tired of trying to have you in my life

three strikes and you're out but i gave you more

so this is my final goodbye im finally closing that door

maybe it wasn't time but i've had enough of waiting

maybe it just wasn't meant to be but now we will never know

i hope one day you get a second chance

i hope one day you would realize that you didnt give me your all

so many things i wanted to say but you never gave me the chance

but thankfully im not gonna live my life with regret

i gave you my all i even forgived

i showed you who i was, who i am, who i wanted to be

but you were too blinded by what? so you just couldnt see

later in life on my wedding day you may cross my mind

later in life on the day of my child(ren) birthday(s) you may cross my mind

but thats all that you're gonna be just a vague memory of what was and what could have been....

From the Daughter you could have had

.


Details | Free verse | |

in my sleep

The is the happiest I’ve felt I don’t know what to say
Seems so real even though it must be fake
Maybe its parts of my past I don’t want to escape
Maybe it’s thoughts I just don’t want to shake
But the reasons for it don’t matter right now
As I’m in my bed and I lie down
I’m back at the day I was born
Parents looking over me. Saying they’ll support me through any storm
Saying they’ll always be here
So there’s no need for me to fear
Then they kiss me goodnight
And promise me that I’m going to live a good life
May parents are alcohol free 
Sister and brother drug free
Just arguing over who’s in charge of the TV remote
Just how a family should be
Finally getting to know what love feels like
Rather than what it could be
Comfortable being myself
No guard up
Family there when I need there help
No self harm scars, I’m doing just fine
I feel some lips touch mine
They just happen to be Rebecca’s 
We’re still together
And we never broke up
Not good at showing my feelings but I’m finally able to show enough
I’m playing football with my father he hasn’t died
I’m smiling and I haven’t cried
We kick the ball away
We sit talking while grabbing five
He simply told me “Son be the best you can”
“I’ll support you in whatever you do”
“I’ll always respect your plans”
So I go and tell Rebecca it’s true
I love you and there isn’t anyone better than you
I just hope you know it
Cause I don’t always know how to show it
She replies by giving me a hug and kiss
From my favourite lips
I hear a ringing damn it’s my alarm clock
This was in my sleep. My favourite dream or the impossible wish?


Details | Free verse | |

Fatigued

There’s something I see in my father
That no one else  seems to see,
Like a blindness to what’s truly good: He is strong.

But I hope to be stronger in the morning,
Rather than the evening
Though the days feel the same

At times I feel he is my only friend
He is funny, but that’s a cover
He is intellectual, which may be his greatest fault
He is wise, but only afterwards

He wakes up after a long sleep
Like every other man should do,
He looks in the mirror,
The only object that see’s who he really is,
With a certain dissatisfaction in his eyes
Like every other man has done

The debris, the wreckage, the wasted 
It’s worn him inside and out
He’s bleary, he’s fatigued,
He’s just tired
Tired of feeling the way he does
Tired of the mistakes he’s made
Like every other man is

He needs a woman that understands, somebody:
That can swim down and pull him from the waters
That can warm his bed and wash his sheets
That can make him laugh and make him cry
That can love him for his flaws
That can love him for who he is
That can even the evening skies because

Nobody deserves to be alone
With only their reflection
Knowing who they really are
That sort of thing can kill a man
I know because I feel that way
And I’m only 21 years of age
What will 30 more do for me?

			 …I hope, at least,
                           That before the night
			   He will watch the sun set
 			   In happiness…

July 28th, 2013


Details | Free verse | |

christmas wish

Our friendship started when I could barely speak. We have been through hell and back again. You gave me everything I needed to live. You gave me love when no one else did. You picked me up when I stumbled and fell. You were there to catch my tears when I'd cry You were there to hug me tight. The time has come to pay you back. I am here to take care of you dad. I guess all the drinks have caught up with you now. Your lungs are shutting down, Your liver is toast, You are suffering and I feel at a loss to help. I hate seeing you so weak and frail. If I had a wish to make It would be for no material thing. nor would it be anything for me. My Christmas wish is for you to live. For you to get your liver transplant. Your days are numbered and you are getting worse. Just know that I am praying hard for you. I am looking for a miracle this Christmas day And hopefully god hears my prayers.


Details | Free verse | |

Lost Photograph- 1

This is my goofy dad.
We're best friends now.
My smoothie cup in his pocket
gives it all away 
in this photograph.

My dad was always fun,
always encouraging me to do good,
listening to music with me,
even taking me on late night trips
to Wal*Mart.
But that was then.
For sixteen years he was always there,
even when it was just to
stick his tongue out 
for a picture in my collage.

I remember feeling insanely happy
that night because 
I was with my dad at the festival.
What I didn't know was that 
in a couple of years
everything would change.

I'm lucky to even be able 
to contact my dad now.
He chose to leave me
so he could make a new best friend.
I wasn't good enough anymore.

-Caroline Youngless


Details | Free verse | |

Fading Scars

Starring heavily at that double knotted rope
I thought optimistically about it
As a mad man
Slapping my dry and rough hands
On the ground
I picked myself up,
Weakly, I barely made it,
Gripping the tightly strung rope.
 From the ground
 To the ceiling
It hung;
With my mind upside down
I believed that it would remove you,
Take away the scars you’ve caused;
I thought it would kill you,
Not me.
Now standing,
 Off that old wooden chair
With my neck tied--
I kicked away. 
I suffocated.
But, that’s weak too;
I only kicked away when the only 
Hangings… were my scars.


Details | Free verse | |

fathers day

This is for all the single mothers raising their child alone
Stressed to the max
Somehow still managing to put a smile on
When the baby daddy left them so fast
For all the mums working non-stop to provide for their kids
Cause the father ran away which is a cowardly act no one can forgive
How could you runaway and just leave your child fatherless?
You were supposed to love them and guard their chest
Protect them from pain, not leave them and their mother in even harder stress
This is the type of thing that leaves you sad
A fatherless little boy just called his teacher dad
So all the other kids make fun of him
You’re his father how could you just run from him
Maybe I’m writing this because I never had my mum or dad
If I get a girl pregnant, I’ll always support her
And give my children everything I never had
A few will say I’m writing this to try and seduce a few milfs
But I’m just taking time to respect the happy home they built
But fathers who are there for their kids don’t get recognition
Breaking up if it’s not right is ok to do
But using your kid as a weapon isn’t
But the truth is quite simple, if you’re not ready to be a dad yet
Then use a condom when you have sex
No child deserves to be abandoned by their mum or dad
Which is why when I have kids they’ll have everything I never had
This is for the single parents who have to raise their child alone
Stressed to the max, but still manage to put a smile on 


Details | Free verse | |

Why?

Why can't I be normal?
Why do I have to fake a smile,
then die as no one sees that it's fake?
Why do I have to wait for someone to care
enough to climb over the wall I've built?
Why do I look, but not see?
Why does the world seem to hate me?
Why do I feel so alone?
Why can't I be a kid?
Why does every sad song seem to apply to me?
Why do I seem so insensitive?
Why do I shut people out, when all I want is to let someone in?
Why do I live life the way I do, 
knowing it is wrong, 
but still live it that way?
Why do I hear voices telling me something is wrong?
Why won't the nagging in my ear go away?
Why can't I find love?
Why don't I let anyone love me?
Why don't I love myself?
Why do I try to act carefree,
but all I do is worry?
Why do people tell me not to care what other people think,
then I try to be myself, they tell me to stop
because people are staring?
Why do adults tell us kids that two wrongs don't make a right,
and then they go seeking vengence?
Why must I act as though I'm not slowly dying?
Why must I only be able to cry on the inside?
Why must I put on a brave face for everything?
Why does my mom call me names that aren't right for a mother
to call a daughter?
Why do Mom and Dad always fight?
Why are my brother and I the subject of all the fights,
and are not allowed to have a say in anything
that is said?
Why do my mom and dad say things about each other they don't mean?
Why did they bother having us, if they knew it wasn't going to work?
Why do people always leave, even when they promise to say?
Why do I have to live up to expectations in oreder
to be loved by my mother?

Why can't anyone answer these questions for me?


Details | Free verse | |

Babies and Kids Struggles

Everyone in the world thinks babies and kids have no struggles we are wrong.
We forget the hardest times of our lives is when we were infant our hearts beat a song.
When we were hungry we would cry, little hands could not grab anything that lye.
We had help to hold our bottles and we felt so helpless in our everyday struggles.
Our eyes did not open till the time that we were able we saw everything huge in size.
It made our heart throb fast and nothing made sense for all the words were gurgles.
The little ears we had we did stress with sound so loud and so unknown made us cry.
The fathers and mothers with kind word almost calmed us while they whispered.
They held us with fear, we had fear just knowing that we could not handle stress alone.
We grabbed things and we just wanted to hear the heart beat of our mom and dad.
That was the only thing in our minds that made us calm and glad.
The first touch of rough skin and strong hands were most comforting, yet scary at once.
Trust gradually grew when whipped our mess and hind ends, which were still scary.
To the large people out there the mind of a child is so simple but they still struggle.
They still need food, love and security that is all they need to grow.
To their lives is what they cling and no one is there to protect them from sorrow.
There are less fortunate kids that never get to hear their mothers and fathers hearts.
They soon empathize with everything around them with an emotion that struggles.
When sleeping on our own we cannot defend ourselves so we have fears.
That's why we cry nightly to sigh relief, we get exhausted and we run out of tears.
Remember the times you seen a child fall down their first step or bump into things.
It is scary when knowledge is lacking and get into things, which are a signs of struggles.
Children is future, it is nice to just watch them study, play and learn who they are.
Babies and Kids smiling, playing loud, and just sitting, they are still people they struggle. 


Details | Free verse | |

Group photo with fishermen

it’s christmas dad 
lend me once more your hand to compare ourselves 
among the living people i ever touched 
only your hand was bigger 

if you want to we can go to the seashore hand in hand 
to leap wave after wave together 
or you can take me to the puppet theater 
where the orange tiger swallows pancakes 
while we’re clapping along with our big hands 

this year i didn’t grow home bread and 
i didn’t burn candles 
i simply crouched with half-opened eyes 
leaning against high cushions 
over a cross scratched with my nails on the bed sheets 
lying in wait
fishing like you dad 
sometimes hours other times days 
go by without any catch 
apart from your pale and slippery smile 
in the last photograph 

dad 
why on earth didn’t you put aside the fishing rod


Details | Free verse | |

Can't Be Saved

She sits on the ground, head against the wall
Wondering when everything went wrong
The first punch was the worst
The first kick was strong
The first bruised never showed
She listens at night for his loud footsteps ascending the stairs
Waiting for the pain she can hardly bare
Her friends see her terror, they see her pain
They ignore it, wishing it away
She sits on the couch quietly, not saying a word
Keeping his secret by lying to the world
She sits in the classroom, eye closed tight
Hiding from the world, a secret of lies
She can't remember ever being loved
She can't remember ever being missed
She remembers the pain when her mom left
She remembers the hurt from her dad
But she doesn't understand why
She wished for it to all go away
She wished for death
She wished for forgiveness, she even begged 
She was to blame when her mother left
Her eyes are empty, no emotion left
She knows its time, Time to say goodbye
She didn't expect to die like this
She didn't think her life would turn out to be this
She was alone, broken, she needed help
Her eyes pleaded, begged
Now were are too late...
She cant be saved.


Details | Free verse | |

The shoelace

A shoelace, one that snags and tears when you try to tighten your shoe too tight. 
Who would have imagined, 
could be a tool used to take my daddy's life. 
Alcohol and drugs, a swirl of depression and a mindset of bamboozlement
Leaving what was once a brilliant artistic mind, 
now second guessing his sanity. 
Put so much faith into a women who made her life hustling, 
transparent to all but him. 
Would leave him alone, with his drug induced thoughts of self loathe. 
While she scampered the streets, and was more enthralled with a "john".
One night was his breaking point, concocting a delusional plan to recapture the harlot's attention. 
Was it a cry for help, and attention? Was it an induced hebetude. 
Sitting cross legged as indians would, a simple shoelace placed around his neck. 
Waiting hours and hours for her to return, to see him in this desperate state. 
The effects of the drugs and alcohol had taken its toll, his eyes heavy... 
He leans forward, the shoelace does not give way. 
I will never know if it was suicide or a drunken stupor!


Details | Free verse | |

flying from the nest

i know you must fly from that nest
that housed your body and soul
for those eighteen long years
from which you always looked out
while your mum and i kept
that constant flying in, to protect
and strengthen every feather
in your wings to take off one day to find
a partner to make your own nest

in that process of my constant flying in
for such an enormous extended time
i have lost my sight beyond that nest
in which i also had lost my soul
that cradled your most beautiful being
making all my flying and fruit gathering
now, utterly meaningless, tearing my heart
multiplying my tears to endlessly flow
while i struggle, in my mind, to let you go


Details | Free verse | |

Outward

Airport terminals betray many turbulent thoughts,
as lives pass and friends fly, far away.
I sit here in this chair, wondering when
I'll ever see such faces again.

Some tears have already made their way down,
forcing themselves to the sad surface.
When shaking hands with your teacher and your friend,
hugging the ones who've made you whole - it is what it is.

More, however, are yet to come.
As we taxi out on the runway, departure-bound,
I see behind my eyes this scene on the silver screen;
and lo, what plays out before my glistening eyes.

A soft melody breaches my ears and my mind,
tag-teaming with the past
to bring forth such savage depths;
drops, slowly, continue to fall.

As I think of those I will always miss,
no matter how close or how undeniably far;
as this is born into life on the page;
I ache for home.

I know what I am;
I fight for all things familiar.
I gave up my right to not feel this,
to defend others' rights never to.

A man dear to me once told me
that I've done my share. No matter how long it's been,
just the first step was enough, he said.
That I owe nothing more.

I hope he's right.
I hope, when this is over, that I can find
all these faces. That I can find
my way back once more.

Maybe one day I can figure out
how to listen.
Maybe one day, I'll live for me;
maybe one day I'll believe him.


Details | Free verse | |

no one is a match similar to her

No one is a match similar to her 
She stands in the wind like a motionless stone
She stands the pain no one can stand 
She cries to God, prays & reads 
She is so good so unlike me though 
I can never live the life she had & stay alive
She is like a white dot in this black world 
She tries to forget, she tries to start again 
But some people just can’t understand her torture 
I try to support her as much as I can
But at the end, I have no effect
With all of this darkness, can I make it all go away? 
I wish she had a peaceful life like other had
I’ll blame myself for being alive
If only just dad could understand her pain
He’d know after all is too late that this is the best wife
Anyone could ever imagine!
I love her so much, I wish anyone would listen 
To the love & sadness she had been through
 I blame my dad for every tear that had fallen 
Oh I’m sure some magic spell had changed him 
Why is this life so a cursed pain
I hate everything that happens here!
If only I had an arrow, I’d throw it right into that man’s face
So he’d know he’s the worst creature ever made!!!


Details | Free verse | |

That Drunken Man

Mommy and Daddy were having difficult times..
Arguing constantly,
cursing that ringed at my small tiny ears. 
I was only 6 years old when he came home 
having a little too much to drink.
I stood there staring at the intoxicated man, 
that I once called daddy.. 
His dead eyes burned into my head,
my body shakes as he stumbles through the hall.
Mommy tells me to run upstairs,
“What’s goin on mama” I cried
“Go NOW!” she croaked
as her eyes stared at me with scarce. 
My brother drags me by the arm upstairs. 
I hurdle into a small ball with tears poking their way down my small delicate face,
crying my heart out as if it was shattered into tiny little pieces.
I was just a little girl than, 
Innocent & Confused..
Police sirens blare from the front lawn.
I shuffle towards the cold window
peeking to see the drunken,
so called father of mine. 
speeding off, 
he was gone in a flash..
But not forever,
He came waltzing back into my life
as if he hadn't hurt a fly.
He left for about a year.. 
The memories we shared,
they’re grey and lost behind the pain which engulfs my brain.
But even today, 
at the age of 13 years old
I wasn’t blind as a bat,
I knew his ‘I’m such a good father card’
was as fake as his smile.
Which just pestered me,
Because of him I was left  drowning in a pool of depression,
I only survived because of having the strength of my mom and brother to pull myself up.
I will never forget that night
That night he bailed, 
leaving my small suffering  family heart broken. 
Yes, hes my father.. 
But no longer is he known as daddy, 
I’m never going to be daddy’s little girl again..
The pain stabbed me in the heart like a knife, 
still leaving scars behind
which leaves me to believe,
I can’t forgive nor forget.. 
That drunken man.


Details | Free verse | |

Anxiety

My dad drinks beer in his angriest t-shirt, waiting
for me to prove my purpose, two doctorates
like scholarly wings to lift his ass
to the upper class, where
he will drink beer in his angriest t-shirt, waiting.


Details | Free verse | |

screw the poem listen anyone i need someone to hear

i'm hurting right now this is like a blog except i haven't quite found out how to work some of 
those yet but i'm a foster kid my mom abandoned me when was 10 she doped me off at a 
gas station and left me there about 2 or 3 hours later my dad came to pick me up and i went 
to live with him i no mom and my dad is the biggest jerk in the world i just recently stoped 
that relationship a day before his birthday and boy is he punishing me i he basically 
abandoned me to even if i wanted to start a relationship again i don't think he would i want 
ready i had been through alot he was in prison most of my life and i never saw my mom 
cause she was always bar hopping never taking care of he kids i have 7 sisters and 3 
brothers and i'm the oldest 15 
well on the 10th of September but i'm close poetry is all i have i'm diagnosed with 
Depression it sucks thats why i have sad poems sorry. my dad wont let me see my sisters or 
my brother it sucks and i miss them sooo much i have to force myself to eat and its hard to 
sleep it sucks but thats just me i cant go 1 day without crying i'm a recovering alcoholic the 
world sucks but i'm in it and i have to be strong and deal with it thats just the way it is ive 
never lived in one place for over to years so ive lived in pretty much every place in 
Wisconsin lol it sucks why am i telling u this because i want you to know why my poems are 
the way they are i'm not insane in just cortney theres alot of stuff that has happed to me 
some ill never forget thanks for reading my poems 

                                    love cortney stone


Details | Free verse | |

No Longer

Beautiful...
This oil scented black...
Closet, no way out...
Mommy? Daddy?
.....................................
There not proud of me...
It stares...
Dead in the doorway...
My slip of air...
Boiler on...
Record plays...
...sdrewkcaB
Silence is in the air...
Dad?
He takes me once again...
Throws me on a bed...
And he said...
Nothing...


Details | Free verse | |

Sell My Soul (from a song I made)

I still see my dad in my dreams man
So in reality its like he never left me man
He told me not to walk on unsecure bridges man
That tells me that my dad still has my back man
I trust that to my homeboys whats up
From kj all the way to Big Russ
Life is like a test take ya time dont rush
Cause if you fail it man..you will be crushed
Whats up Big Weezy(lil bro) imma be your light
Im your guide man everything gone be alright
Ive done alot of things in my life despite
The help of my loved ones who kept my game tight


Everytime I try to stop he keeps drawin me in
Say imma drink punch....Then I add the gin
So many drunken nights....I dont know where to begin
I try to be good....then it just turns into sin
People used to say "dont forget me Dave"
So no matter if i know you or not i still wave
Ya gotta learn to make people happy today
Let em live through you so they can feel the play
Keep ya head above water so that you dont drown
Just shrug it off man if them boys try to clown
Its the devils job to keep that frown
Turn that frown upside down Charlie Brown.


Details | Free verse | |

PARENTS

hungers of each other's respect;
bruising feeling with no intent,
so much left to consider other than this.
I don't want to be laughed at like a train dog,
mistakes that never shine to be shown.
underrated compliance with no deeper meaning;
looking forward to not being worthy,
day by day,
does it make a difference?
toughing out  the storm of the normal,
both rugged with teh rigidness edges of our patience.
still claiming to be happy,
suited only to the hidden faces of the masks of tears.
lies within lying:
buried deep inside,
a closet full of bones and regrets,
a problem yet to be faced and fulfilled...............!!!


Details | Free verse | |

You Are No Part Of Me

This is the poetry of the broken,
been beat down so hard that ya need to toke and,
This is the **** that I keep inside,
all this ****in **** that I try to hide, cause,

I know you weren't proud, I know you wouldn't grieve,
If tomorrow brought a world, the same but missing me,
All the things that you've said only allow me to believe,
I know even though I share your blood, you are no part of me.

This is for the time I got your **** thrown in my face,
I'd wipe it off, keep walkin, wouldn't even break my pace,
But I can't keep it in me or I'm going to explode,
My neck and shoulders breakin under the pressure of this load,

I know you weren't proud, I know you wouldn't grieve,
If tomorrow brought a world, the same but missing me,
All the things that you've said only allow me to believe,
I know even though I share your blood, you are no part of me.

These words are the way I feel,
Let me assure you that it's all for real,
Maybe this time you'll listen,
Hearing all your **** while my jaw its clenchin,
Biting my tongue almost everyday,
Trying not to listen to a word you say,
Because for too long now I've been eating your poison,
And I'm sorry that your sorry about the path you've chosen

I know you weren't proud, I know you wouldn't grieve,
If tomorrow brought a world, the same but missing me,
All the things that you've said only allow me to believe,
I know even though I share your blood, you are no part of me.


Details | Free verse | |

At Home for the Weekend

Mother smells like an old kitchen sponge
Father sips coffee from his chipped mug
Faye hums a melody searching for rhythm
The old dog lying on his back fully exposed
I should visit more often
As I left my feet for Faye to sweep
I fold the newspaper in halve
The kitchen table's front left leg
Is supported by an old dictionary
And the conversation is lost for words.


Details | Free verse | |

Rant About Feelings

What is family?
Is it judging everything,
From what your child says to what your child does?
Is it placing the blame,
For all of your problems on your creation?
Is it favoritism,
Between your spouse and you child?
This is not family.
We are not a family, 
And we never have been. 
I will not call you my family,
You are simply guardians to me. 
Family should help a child with their problems, 
Not make them worse. 
The depression, the anxiety, the insecurity, 
It all stems from how you treat me. 
You are not a father to me, 
Because that is not how you act. 
You are not a mother to me, 
Because that is not how you act. 
Seventeen years, and it's only gotten worse on me. 
I'll admit, 
I could have it worse. 
You do not physically abuse me,
You are not poor citizens. 
You just do not know how to be parents. 
You verbally abuse me. 
It gets tiring. 
I'm unattractive to you, 
I'm not thin enough for you, 
You don't like the clothing I like, 
You don't like the hairstyles I like, 
You don't like the way I do my makeup.
I understand. 
But, 
I am not living to be like you.
I am living to be myself.
Parents, off all people, 
Should understand that. 
Rather, you ridicule me,
You judge me for everything that I am. 
I do not feel loved. 
I do not feel cared for. 
I say I'm going to leave in a year, 
And you laugh in my face. 
But, trust me, 
It will happen. 
You will rue it, 
Because when I'm gone, 
I am gone. 
I will not come back. 
I will not call. 
I will not write. 
I will not visit. 
You've had your chances, 
At making a relationship with me, 
Your only daughter, 
And your second daughter. 
It's over now. 
It's too late, 
And the damage is done. 
You are not parents to me. 
You never will be.


Details | Free verse | |

I Won't Write Santa

This year I won't write Santa,

Instead I'll write the President.

I won't forget to five-space indent,

Or write, Sincerely, George; from Atlanta.

I hope he reads all his notes, like Santa,

For at Christmas, he takes time to listen.

To a little boy that feels so sad,

Because all year he've missed his dad.

My dad is quite a brave man,

To go and serve in foreign lands.

Mom says, I must be real strong,

A sad letter to the President would be wrong.

My mom is always right,

Though, I must write to him this night.

I won't write a sad letter to him at all,

I'll write, "hope you have a ball."

I know he'll spend time with his dad,

His dad must be really proud and glad.

He'll have all his love ones with him,

"Ho-Ho, Merry Christmas to all of them."


Details | Free verse | |

Photo Album

It first appeared during their wedding 
along with the other gifts that were given 
by family and friends celebrating
as two hearts were made one and uniting 

Then it was seen again on the day of the 24th
as the last child, a girl, was born
before that, there were two boys that arrived
ten years earlier. as it was depicted in the picture

Lastly, it lay on the bedside table, open
Not a space not filled with captured moments
the photo album now old with rusty scent,
and tears intrude on pages a middle-aged man was depicted

Now the old man has passed away 
leaving only photographs turning old and gray 
upon the photo album tattered from late night reminiscence
of the memories since 30 years ago on their wedding day.


Details | Free verse | |

Please Read About My Echo

We spoke today,
and we haven't spoken in a while,
Mom is in the bedroom,
                                     and Dad in the basement,

I'm on the bed- crying like a child,
and although all windows are shut,
a wind filters in,
bringing in
that old echo
                       the silent echo,
of cemetaries,
when the dead echo their name,
abuse, abuse, abuse,
"we lived once and were children,
but then we were abused,
and became
                    adults",

so I'm crying like a child,
and know abuse,
but life went on and scars
                                         were fused,

refused to let the pain sink in,
and abused my verse,
and never wrote with my own hand
just a dead man's eyes
and the hatred of my father
                                             who knew abuse,

and gave it like a regifted toaster at a wedding,
a toast that's burnt with obligation,
and consistency, always burnt,
                                                abused, crushed, ashes

as those cherished china vases where the dead poets
smugly held their noses high as I sniffed their poetry,
laid to rest in that cemetary where the wind blew,
and came home,
and left a gentle music as I spoke with my mom,
and my dad stayed in the basement and pretended he cared I was home,
and I'm not crying anymore,
                                          because we heard the echo and didn't ignore it today.


Details | Free verse | |

Love Comes in Many Forms

Love comes in many
shapes and sizes
In many forms
and devices.

But love that is
certain and never a fad
Is the love that I 
got forever from dad.

You taught me to love and
to fight for my right
You took me in and
kissed me goodnight.


Details | Free verse | |

Why Dad

Hey dad this is for you
Oh dad….
Why did you leave me?
I am alone with no guidance 
Every time I have a birthday and never get a card 
I remember the pain you caused
Throughout my last 19 years
It aint easy to grow up without you 
But I made it and I am stronger than ever
But I made it and am stronger than ever before
Daddy why did you say good bye
And stop talking to me 
All I want is to get a card from you or something
I sit here every day and am stuck with the sad truth that you wouldn’t send it 
I don’t know what to do 
I am lost without you 
But you never send for me 
I sat there for 19 years praying hoping to see you 
And then the day came 
I saw you for a few years and you disappeared again 
Leaving me without a man in my life
I had no male guidance to speak of 
But I had my three headed mother that will ever live on 
I hope to see you still 
No matter the pain caused you are still my dad and I love you 
Just remember you have a son who cares and is old enough to understand 
All I want is to talk 
To speak 
To write 
Something for me to know you care and haven’t forgotten about me
Just haven’t forgotten me or else 
I would truly be lost for good 
No one will help me 
I will be lost forever and never to be found
No matter what they do
 The only cure would be you saying I love you
I need dad more than ever and don’t know to do without you


Details | Free verse | |

My Dad

Who loves me enough to keep track of me by the color of the sky?
Who is the one who still loves me if I win, loose or die?
 My Dad
He stands among a chosen few
There are a lot things for him to do
Obligations, situations countries all a mess
He puts his best foot forward and does his best
 My dad loves me and I love him to
When we are together theres nothing us two 
Couldn't do, because we are the same, nothing new
 My dad and I the same and God knows why
 
Ruth Courtney


Details | Free verse | |

Blinded by the Lies

I looked up to you
only to be shot down by your soul
I was blinded by the lies you told me
Blinded by the truth they hid.
I thought you were my one and only, 
the other half of my life...
But you did those things to hurt me.
Life was the murderer,
But you were the bullet that drove deep into my heart,
That i will never forgive,
And i slowly ripped it out
But you will forever stay in.


Details | Free verse | |

My Daughter Lives In The Sea

I see in the air a beauty.
I see a love swallowing another.
And now my daughter lives in the sea, and
There on the hill my wife mends gardens, while
I stand with a rake forty feet afar with
My eyes blurred from laughter,
And the salty sea breeze.
My daughter lives in the sea.
She will rise from the surface of our love,
Flower into the air, above the passion of our pastures,
And the florid grace of our existence.


Details | Free verse | |

WHO IS THIS MAN

He has a trigger 
but doesn't own 
a gun.

He likes to play 
but never allows 
Himself to have any fun.

Drinks too much alcohol 
trying to dull his pain.
He is as brash as he is 
Harsh  
won't hesitate to tare you
Apart just because he can 
but who is this man....

As he grows weaker
his life regrets cut in a little 
deeper.
Abuses alcohol to dull his pain
To proud to say I'm sorry he
take that pride to his grave.
I love that man regardless of all
His done, he taught me right from wrong
Who is this man he is my dad


Details | Free verse | |

Great Daddy

Gifts you received are eternal
Irreversible, divine, one of a kind
Gifts you asked for
Gifts you get just because
Know 
Love 
Lord


Details | Free verse | |

a love not to be forgotten

A love not to be forgotten
After the disaster, after the misery
Little sister of mine begged my dad for chicks
He tried to convince her what a bad idea it is
How a hard caring takes to keep them alive
How a rise in temperature or decrease in temperature
May cause their death.
She didn’t get convinced, she is so stubborn
So dad said louzana so do you want one?
I my voice was weak, my sorrow increased, and I said no...
I went to the room, tried to study, and then fell in tears
I couldn’t imagine how life is without him
I couldn’t let go of him, I couldn’t believe he was gone
Dad, sisters came, six chicks they brought
Dad the room entered; told me the news:-
I two chicks have brought you 
I smiled untruthfully at him and went to take a glimpse
Six chicks sticking together seeking warmth; their sight softened my heart
Gave a feather to my stone -frozen soul 
I looked at them, carried them out of their box resistance
They started to poo, the other drinking the pee of another 
They seemed stupid and small 
The room called I went back to it 
2nd day,    somehow better, selected two of then and marked them red and blue
3rd day   , took one-hundred and something pics of them.
Day 4   ,   someone died.
Day 5,    someone died   .
Day 6,    someone died   .
Day 7:-     blue disappeared and was gone.
Day 8:- three were left: red, green and green
My love grew wider to red, he started to love me 
He started to sleep in my palm, and run after I go 
I love you red, forever, and eternity
I gave them all the love I can afford
My sister made a woolen jacket for him 
He wore it and slept in it a thousand times
The days past and his strength became sightless and the day became darker,
I looked at his little- small yellow face 
And see him trying to sleep on his fellow friend green 
Three days past, and he continued his suffering in them day by day, hour by hour, second by 
second, breath skipping breath
The days in their youngness and the chick in his last age…
My tears fell from the breath-taking scene and heart rending moment
I prayed and cried and begged and lied, what shall I do?
The 3rd day first morning woke up, the maid threw him away; found him all over ants,
All without breath.
I knew this day would come but I never thought it’d be too close
I never wanted his death to be too slow
But this is life, some people die, others are meant to stay 
Don’t know what is comin, feelin some guilt, never know who’d be the one 
Who would stay and share a partnership of a lifetime 


Details | Free verse | |

Violin

The father dragged the boy into the room and pushed the violin into his son’s hands. It felt heavy, heavy with the weight of expectations. “You will play beautifully.” He thundered as he turned to leave, “I will not allow you to fail.” “But father,” the boy replied, “I don’t want to play the violin.” “I will lock you in this room until you understand.“ His tone was firm, “I do not want you to regret not being able to play, as I do.” The door was locked. The boy looked at the violin in disgust, he played, and he grew bored. He stared at it as time spilled out. He kicked the door, he shouted for release. There was no reply. The violin mocked him. He hated it, he played again and its tune was different. His father returned, standing in front waiting patiently was the boy, violin in one hand and bow in the other. “I understand now father.” The boy announced. “You can play?” “No”, said the boy, “But I’ll never regret it.”


Details | Free verse | |

Yes Ma'am "Yesterday"

I didn’t sleep last night; Ma’am was in a very nice mood Yesterday
   That scares  me : would punishment be twice as bad today 
Millie was the only one  all she got was a “unheard” verbal warning
I’ve lived here 10 months  next week, I’ve never seen such a  Monday
I awoke very early yesterday  ,I wanted to talk to “DAD” before work
As Dad and I were talking : Ma’am in sheer silk pajama’s , my eyes decline
Good Morning “Mom” (we could say “ Mom” when DAD was there)
I’ll be going upstairs  Ma’om  I hope that sounded  like MOM : “Please”
Oh, Harry ; you don’t have to go upstairs : Talk with your  Father “Eggs Anyone”??
My Heart is beating quickly , Something is wrong, Ma’am being nice????
In front of a child, in front of his “DAD” six Years old and I could feel Death 
As The Station Wagon backed to the end of the driveway “ See you on the weekend”
"GOODBYE DAD"  as I turned the sunlight shinning On Ma’am's transparent form
Harry go upstairs and wake everyone up It’s family Breakfast day  ( NEVER BEFORE)
If only We could have  seen the future Would any of us got out of bed  “TUESDAY “??


TODAY life starts again 
 Evil was thwarted
What will Tomorrow BRING? 
Maybe the family from the dreams of my YOUTH
That FAMILY is YOU : “POETRYSOUP”


Details | Free verse | |

Heroin

I am 18 years old
I just found out that I spend most of my time sleeping, 
I am obsessed with it. 
I have lived for 9,460,800 minutes
Most of which I waste on sleep
Sleeping is my personal heroin,
It lets my arms as a pair of wings  to fly me  to paradise.
When I want to escape from reality,    
I shoot it up my veins.

One day, my mom was chatting with her friends, 
When they discussed my studies, 
I looked down at my shoes while their children smiled smugly.
Their smiles struck my wings like lighting
The path to my paradise began to disappear 
I thought I could use my broken wings to open their eyes 
so that they would see my true face
But this was just my imagination
I needed a hit so bad that I slept for 3 days
Feeling likes a puppet, no pain as my strings are pulled
My dream leads me into that sense again,
I looked at their lips and heard their words, proudly I say to her friends, “I am better than your child.”
When I awake, I feel my emotions flood back to me stronger than before

When I was in high school,
I worked so hard but I still couldn’t achieve a score to be proud of
When I see my father’s rough hands, I am shamed by my B Grade Paper.
Then I begin to think what I can do for him, 
I ask: “DAD! Can I go to get a part-time job?

“No, getting back to your studies!”

I prepared to take another shot of heroin
To help me pretend as if nothing happened
I used to think that sleeping would solve my ailments
    But I realized 
I realized that I am escaping
   Like boxers hide behind their gloves 
Like timid warriors escape from the battlefields

These years, I am search in for peace
But opiate feeling blinds my eyes 


Details | Free verse | |

WHEN THE CHAINS FELL OFF

Most
        do not
                   know
                    nor
comprehend
we
         too
                 were
                 slaves
this 
England
             this
                   England
I 
was    bred
                   a mere
                    pawn
too
in 
       empire
                   painted
                   red
when
they
         returned
                       from
that
last
          Great
                      war
enough
is enough
               they
                   swore
victory
        became
                 a victory
of
peace
            as they
                   broke
                   free
the
wind
           of change
               spread
forth
           to
                  multiply
as
empire
             became
                   common
 wealth 


Details | Free verse | |

Camping Out

Three vehicles
parked in a circle.
A modern wagon train.

Inside the sanctuary of the circle,
instead of children playing as they did 
in the days of the covered wagons -
empty bottles, a gas stove,
bags of dog food, wrinkled clothes, wet towels, 
folding chairs and food wrappers.
Everything is varnished 
with a blue, wet cold.

Mom, Dad and teenage boys spend a lot of time
inside the vehicles with their dogs. 
They read, listen to the radio,
play with damp cards, tell stories, and dream of the
time when they can have hot water
tumbling over them in their new home.

They are up at four to start the cars 
to warm up a bit.
Then, a few hours of sleep 
before the little car pulls out in the dark,
on it's first mission of the day to
take the boys to school, a few miles away.

Four dogs.  Two brown ones,
one black and white one, and a new, brown
one rescued when a far-away, family member died during
their stay in the church field.
The black and white dog
runs out to the end of his 
rope until it is stopped quick with the choke chain.
They all would like to get away, off their chains...

The boys, wash their long hair from
water warmed a bit in the sun on the hood of dad's car. 
Sometimes I catch mom or dad drying their hair
with big, orange towels.

Some mornings, I see them walk over the dirt
hills of the bicycle park
to the
public bathrooms.
They walk slowly, carrying their towels 
and the weight of their plight.


Details | Free verse | |

Yard Work

On dead, dry, summer afternoons

I used to watch my dad work around the lawn

his dusty, brown work gloves carried the wheel barrow

or leaned the shedding ladder against the house.

The briny voice of the radio tells the score

while the sun plays in the trees.

I make my own games on the ground.

Later, Mom will call the dogs in

and Dad will lay the fertilizer over the yard.

tangy rays of sunlight will cut across the barbwire

and cars will pass the mailbox home from work,

so they can enjoy BBQ dinner.


Details | Free verse | |

Visits

He comes to visit twice a week
He only stays a little while
He tries to talk to hold his hand
He knows you can't understand

Dad sits in his wheelchair
Looking out the window
Daydreaming of being free
Looking to see what ever there is
To see
Just not looking for me

His mind has left him
His body is weak
He is a fragile old soul
His spirit is meek
He doesn't know me
Or anyone at all
He searches
For the past
In his heart
What was first
Remains last

I hold his hand
He clings to mine
He mumbles and stares into the air
I brush his balding head
With my hand
I wish I could stay longer
But Dad doesn't know 
I see him for me
I see him for me

I'm his host and he my guest
Just for seconds
A minute or so
His eyes see me
His face smiles recognition
I smile and close my hand
Into his
Thank you Dad for your visit
It was good  to be with you again

I wish we had longer
But I really must go
This place is nice
They take good care of him
So twice a week
I see him there
And I hope
He visits me
Visits


Details | Free verse | |

Open Fantasy

Tired, exhausted working 2, 3 sometimes 4 jobs 
 Is what mama had to do to keep a roof over our heads 
Raised by brothers and sisters never seen mothers face 
 Was what i had to go throught on a daily base
To think mama had to do it on her own 
 Why because you were behind bars with a foggie mirrow and a bed 
Given everything you needed clouths, food and more 
 Never had to work to survive behind those silver doors 
You though we lived in paradise but in truth we were on the road to the after life 
 In my eyes the world was nothing but endless darkness 
And my escape was my emotions being spilled on a page that was ment for you
 To believe the girt i recieved from you was a knife plunged into my back
At that moment in time my wolrd came tumbling down
 Shattered into a million peices that will never be found
Can't believe i let my self be fouled into thinking your a fantastic dad
 But in thruth your only a clown 
A joke that's what you are a child stuck in a 50 year old man 
 The mask you've worn for so many years has finally sunck so deep it made you blind
You can't see your choices and mistakes are what make your binds 
 You went so low to take mama's life 
Why because she wanted out of the marriage and you out of her life 
 I remeber the day as though it were yesterday images replaying itself just by your name 
You banging on the door to let you in 
 Saying if we dont today will be are end 
That was the first time i seen big sister so scared 
 Crying and screaming with all her might for help 
That was torture to bear 
 Looking into mama's eyes there was nothing but fear
Not for herself but her children who were there 
 Crying there eyes out and screaming for there mothers help 
To think the man i once called father  the one who gave me life 
 Who told me multiple times he'd always be there is my greatest fear 
Everyday before i walk out the door of my house 
 I close my eyes lift my hands and pray to the lord 
Hoping he'd bring back the gently kind man that i held so dear 
 But iknow in my Mind and in my Heart it's 
    only and Open Fantasy


Details | Free verse | |

Dad

                           

You left us as the snow fell one cold December day
Six years ago soon it will be 
Every Christmas since is not the same
But God called you away that day

I wish we had talked more when you were alive
Stories of who you were as a child
But you did not have a good childhood 
And it caused you pain to remember

As a dad you worried to extreme I thought
Even about things you couldn’t change
I realize why after all these years
You were afraid of death and loss

You lost your father when you were a young teen
And this changed your world forever
Being the oldest your family depended on you
So childhood passed you by

I understand so much more now Dad
Your sacrifices you made in your life
I never thanked you for all you did
So I hope you can read this from heaven

In closing Dad I just want to say
I love you and miss you every day
Every time I watch a beautiful sunset
I think of you and say thank-you


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Not Ready Part 1

Mother:

Shivering nights follow me as my stomach grows

I feel her inside me

I can picture her face, smile, personality

Worth such a huge future

But I couldn’t give it to her

I’m not ready…

He doesn’t want her

We couldn’t handle it

The pressure, the responsibility

And god the things that are happening to my body

I’m not ready

I’m not

My mom cries whenever she looks at me

My dad doesn’t even look

I couldn’t take care of her by myself

Maybe…maybe I can give her away

To a family that could love her until I’m ready

There’s so much I haven’t done

Goals I haven’t fulfilled

All my dreams are gone

Because of a mistake

A onetime mistake

I learned my lesson

But I can’t take care of this baby

She needs so much more,

She deserves so much more

I can’t let her come into this world like this

I’m not ready

 

Daughter:

Its ok mommy

You don’t have to worry

You’re not alone

I still love you

You can still follow your dreams if you try

And teach me how to do right

I’m going to be a sweet baby

People are going to call me your twin

Don’t you like the sound of that mommy?

I promise to do my best in everything

So I can make you proud mommy

When I come

We’ll have each other

And that’s all that's going to matter

We’ll prove everyone wrong

And do better than anyone expected

We can do it mommy

You can do it

I believe in you

 

Mother:

I can’t do this

I can’t

I’ll try again when I’m ready

It’s not even alive yet

So it’ll be ok

He said he would leave me

My dad said I was stupid

And my mom…

She had such high hopes and dreams for me

I can still do it

I can make them proud

But not with this thing growing in me

It’s ok

It can’t feel anything

And later on ill be the best mother ever

But not now

I’m not ready


Details | Free verse | |

A Young Boy's Dog

For a young boy in
1951 things were not
going right.

School friends I had
none, had no one
to turn to.

Knew that my dad
had a great collie
named shep.

Loved this dog
so, as he loved
me, even more.

I had been down
to my dad's farm
many a time,

shep and me
would play
on and on for hours
and more.

One glad day
my dad paid
my mom and
me a visit,

said how would
you like to have
shep for your
to keep?

My mom said
yes and I of course
became the happiest
kid in the world.

Not knowing all
the fun that this
dear dog and I
would share
for many a,

year nor many
memories,
this loveable
friend would give me.

wrote 8-27-08  NOTE HERE
        Dad gave shep to me because he said
that he was a chicken killer and an egg sucker he told me,
that once a dog did that you could never break them. and if i didn't take shep
he would have to have him killed. Many years later I did break shep of these things. My
dad could not believe it. He told me shep must be one special dog.  
You know what dad, He was.


Details | Free verse | |

GIVE THANKS - POULTRY FER THANKSGIVIN'

"Howard    woncha say a few wurds?
Cum on    Howard    like over tha bird."
Says Aunt Jen    visitin' fer the holeeday.

Weuns are seated    tha eight of us    at this here sumpchus dinner table,
Lookin' at the damndest    big    brown poultry ya iver seen.
Howard    ma Dad    is jist liftin' a forkful a meat    drippin' gravy an dressin'.
Tha rest of us heseetate    not knowin' what's a cumin.'
Our familee niver did give no thanks fer nuthin'.

Now    dad lays down the heepin fork    careful like    chokes    then beegins -

"Weeeellll    Lord    I chased ol' Mahitabel all roun' tha yard.
She knew what was a cumin'    an' diseepeered inta the rushes by tha pond.
Couldn't see her nohow    but put a barrel-full inta the weeds anyways
Heered this here squawk!
Looked all through tha stalks fer old Mahitabel,
Niver found her

But!    Lord    we do now thank ye most bounteefullee fer this here swan.
A men" 


Details | Free verse | |

HOME

Coming home from school to a steaming hot scone
That Mum’s has just made
Per chance to rest 1 head on your childhood dream infused
Pillow bed
Feeling safe, warm, cosy
Intoxicated by the smell the carpet shed 
While watched over by mum and dad sleeping in bed
Knowing that if we got sick a pan of lentil soup and 
A hot bath would take care of it
Was sadly replaced by grown up stuff 
And having to knock on the door of the place I called home
Which in a strange twist of fate I came to own
Doesn’t feel like home because Joby and Dad are not home. 


Details | Free verse | |

The Convict Part 3

Many months ago, a man from Middleton moved to, 
A province of vices and soured delinquencies 
Where dreams remain dreams
And reality seems unnatural 
Like angels and demons in a guileful romance

Few months ago, a young enforcer was stationed
At the city of madness where reason has no reason
To be a reason, the city stood on a wild-wind bedlam!
Moans, groans and squeals were bedtime songs 
That cradles everyone to sleep

The man from Middleton, my dad, a conformist preacher
A norm embedding parson passing creeds
From his forefathers to me, the enforcer, his seed -
He is the pioneer of my creation
An astute fellow to the bone
I live his air and breath his life
Just like him, I'm never pliant
Wrong is wrong and right is right
'No matter whose ox is gored'
That I've learnt, I've mastered and revered

*********************

One daring day, amid vast numbers of outlaws
A dare-devil hooped into the enforcer's bay
His face was masked with effronteries of crime
And calmly, he strolled to a safe like he owns it -
An enforcer skirmishes him halfway to the safe-room
But was overpowered and subdued with a deadly choke
And within the barriers of life and death 
The man from Middleton who seeks the well being 
Of his son; the son staring and clinging to deaths' strings
He man took a baseball bat and hit his head
And when the outlaw charged, 
He hit him with a blow on the chest
And the outlaws' soul flee the earth
But he did something extraordinary'
He repeatedly clubbed his remains to mutilation

"Father, you just killed a man"
****************

I've sworn to you to solemnly uphold
Your sacred transferals in me as my ethical fealty
In which laws aren't dared but held in esteem,
My call to the Force was like that of a messiah
You knew that just like I too - very well;
"For if there was a crime, damn all involved and
Make the call asap" these were your words -
Your norm, my belief, a practical now -
When guilt smolders his old face
I grabbed the phone and thumbed 911...


Details | Free verse | |

Come by the Sword Die by the Sword

Nothing changes
Really
I see the then
As if it were now
I trust that I shall
See you then
Again
Somehow
 
The door stands open
As you muster
What remains
Pulling yourself
Out of yourself
Denied your burden
Your weathered shell 
For me
To see
That unfettered soul
Remaining whole
While the cat slept
And the clock crept
 
I draw now as then
So close…
Within
The reach of arms
That taught me to hold
I feel them now
So strong
Somehow
Lifting me up
To stumble once more

Firm hands
Help me stand
Place me
Upon the floor
You teach me to walk
Each day
I step toward
The whole of you
Beyond the door
  
Like a spell
Your smell
Wafting over the years
Perfume
Of daddy’s room
Still tell
Of hope not fears
Of life poured
And poured well
I feel you Pop
I feel your smell
 
 
Tis our song
All along
Your laugh 
in my ears
Five by five
We alive
In the song
Not the tears
 
We listen
We laugh
Life surges around
Its my lips
Searching
He who
Taught them to sound
They miss
Your kiss
Hugging me off the ground
 
Now every day
Somehow
Someway
Each other
A little boy does seek
Your sound
And shadow
Smiling
Me a halo
On every
Best day of the week



Details | Free verse | |

It hurts

Sitting alone in the dark
forced to do nothing but think
to think about how you weren't there
you weren't there when I took my first step
you weren't there when I said my first word
you missed all the 'bring your parents to school' days
every little girl had their dads come
all except one,
me
it hurts
it hurts to think that you never cared
you cared about no one but yourself
not even your own kid
you weren't there when I lost my first tooth
you weren't there for the father daughter dances
I made up stories when everyone asked if you were coming
I shouldn't have had to do that
no one should
I try to forget about you
but it's hard
it's hard to know that all these years your dad is out there somewhere
and you ask 
why?
why didn't I have a daddy like the other girls?
was I not good enough for daddy?
why doesn't daddy love me?
did I do something wrong?
tons of thoughts race through my head
as I sit here in complete darkness
listening to only the faint murmurs in my head
forced to do nothing but think
why daddy?


Details | Free verse | |

PIM -DAD


Dear Dad
The foods that I left
In the altar that I wish
You reborn to another life
With my prayer to Buddha
To you my fullest love
You live in my mind forever and always


Details | Free verse | |

Dad

Dad, I miss you
You have taught me so very much
When I needed a friend, you taught me how to be one
I skinned my knee, you picked me up, blew away the pain
When I fell from a tree you were there to pick me up
Dad, my dad how I miss you.
When the play ground was full we played alone
Tag..horse back rides...whatever made me happy
Never depend on any man, that's what you told me
I needed advice it was you who told me the truth

Even for the holidays we didn't have very much
But it was you who took a little and made a lot
You were my Santa in a suit just for me
You taught me to respect everyone despite their age
Love will open doors that have been closed for years-
I shall never forget that's what you said.
Because of you Dad I am me- with a lot of pride.
Dad, I miss you!


Details | Free verse | |

Story of my Life

Yesterday my parents got drunk and wasted like every night but my dad did not 
Have the right to say the things that were said and did now we all have tears to 
Shed. The story is simple it just goes like this my dad left the room with blood on 
His fist mumbling words witch were unknown but his voice had a very awkward 
tone 
Then he collapsed on the floor and I rushed into the open door. When I saw my 
Mom lying on the floor I grasped her tight and said, " I can’t take much more". 
Then she opened her eyes and not thinking right pushed me away and grabbed 
A knife she said her life was bad and that it was only getting worse and now she 
Was gonna brake this awful curse. She said she wasn’t meant to live with tears 
Running from her eyes but the sad part is she never said good bye with fear and 
Anger bestowed upon her face she happily cut herself out of the human race. 
She 
Grasped the knife tight as I pleaded not this way and she stabbed it through her 
Heart and with excruciating pain I grabbed her tight and never let go. But what 
Really caught my ears was when she told me please don’t cry, I was meant to 
die 
I’m happy and now I’m free. But how could she do this awful thing to me I loved 
Her so much but now all I can do is say be kind and helpful to your parents love 
Them more the anyone else and hold them tight cause it could only that one 
night 
For something to go wrong them they will be gone so please for me hold them 
Tight and even give them a kiss good night. My parents were drunk as usual and 
I 
Don’t believe they meant the things they said to me, my mom was sad and 
beaten 
By my dad, you see it can only take one stupid mistake from someone else to 
Cause so much pain, and tears will be shed and my story will go on till everyone 
Is dead. I love my mom so much but now all I can do is pray that she is happy 
And that I can see her again but I hope deep and within that she will be my 
Guardian angel my blessing from above but all I need now is a parent with love.


Details | Free verse | |

Teaching by Immersion

Teaching by Immersion
(A poem for my dad…)

When I was young
On the tiny island of Tonga
My dad taught me to swim
“Swim”
He said as he threw me 
From the back of the boat

As the water closed
Over my head
I felt
Free
I wasn’t afraid
I knew I could hold my breath 
until someone above panicked
and
my dad would crash 
into the water and lift me into the sun
I don’t remember ever
Being taught how to swim
I simply remember waiting
Calmly
In the blue green blur
For my dad
And 
The sun…


Details | Free verse | |

single mother asbsent father

Single mother from the start, left alone here with the pieces of my heart. A constant battle for energy, a game I can't win, the bills and the laundry keep coming for me.
Absent father gone off to be free, I'm a pawn in his game and he's imprisoned me.
Shackles and chains a heavy burden on my sole, twisted and tormented at the situation, how we got here, ill never know.
The married mothers judge me because they think they are better, what kind of mother would they be if their lives were as a single mother. Sitting around whilst their husband works, holidays and house maids remove their curse. I'm done with their judgments, I hold them in contempt, they got a lesser sentence, they can sit on the fence. 
I do the job of two people or more, I work and I clean and I shop for four, I budget and wash and drop off to school, promptly go home to sweep and mop floors.
Absent fathers on a relaxing cruise, he called to say wish you were here, it left a bruise. 
Absent father didn't show up again, the children are still waiting and try to pretend, let's pretend he is coming, like he said he will, let's pretend if I keep my coat on he definitely will, I'll wear it and wear it until long after dark. he doesn't show up again now theres a shock!  The children are sad and it makes me mad, one absent father destroying his own flesh, he's selfish and hurting me through them.
one thing I can say is us single mothers are strong, we keep on coping no matter what he does wrong. we are here bringing love to our own, mending the heart break absent father has done


Details | Free verse | |

To Love Again

The day dad went HOME to be with JESUS,
was a very difficult one for you.

You were happy to know he was no longer suffering,
on the other hand, your heart was broken too.

You were together for many years.
You both had your ups and your downs.

Now that he was gone, you felt lost inside.
You didn't know what you would do without dad around.

The years went by. JESUS was there to comfort you.
THE LORD filled the emptiness you had in your heart.

You knew that one day, you would be reunited with dad again,
and then you would never be apart.

You said, never again.
Never again will I love another man like I love your dad.

We told you, don't ever say that, you never know.
GOD might have another plan.

HE DID!

THE LORD gave you a blessing.
HE gave you another companion and a friend.

HE knew what would be best for you.
HE wanted you to love again!


Details | Free verse | |

An Unexpected Thanksgiving

That morning, I thought I was dreaming
I heard my Dad say it, but I thought my ears were playing tricks on me
I didn't expect for this to happen to you
Well, at least not this soon

My Dad and aunts said they saw it coming
But the news to me was shocking
Every other time, you always pulled through
But this time, you must have been tired and answered when God called you

It seemed unreal to me
Because I was so use to you coming home and recovering
That's why it took me by surprise
When she called and said that you died

I thought I would've been brave and not shed a tear
But seeing that casket made it a reality that you were no longer here
I couldn't hold back the tears that were falling from my eyes
Because it had finally hit me that we were about to say our good-byes

They had you dressed so pretty in your bone white dress
And you laid nice and peaceful in your white casket
You looked so wonderful laying in your final rest
Knowing that you're now in peace and quiet

I still can't believe that you're gone to this day
But you lived a good life and it was your time to go away
We didn't wanted to let you go on that Thursday
But we had to on the twenty-eighth

My eyes filled with tears as I wrote this
Because even though you're gone, my love for you still exists
From that Thursday to that Wednesday, your children reminisced
About the old days with you and how you will be missed

I hope and pray that my sister and I won't face losing our parents no time soon
Because I look at us and see how we cried and miss you
I tell my family that I love them every day and night
Because I never know when it's going to be one of our time

To Grandma Lillian E. Glover
December 25, 1930-November 22, 2007
Missed sadly by loved ones


Details | Free verse | |

Meeting Dad Again

Meeting Dad Again


Thirty years later, Dad came back 
and we met for Ham and Yams at Toffenetti’s.
Pouring his tea, he told me he had
to restore power once

at a newspaper warehouse 
and the storm broke again
and lightning cracked his ladder.
He spent the whole day, he said,

sitting in that dark warehouse,
waiting for the lightning to stop
and for the truck to bring a new ladder.
He had a great time, he said,

next to a flickering lantern,
reading for hours the Sunday comics
printed and stacked
six months in advance.


Donal Mahoney


Details | Free verse | |

Dad

My dad has always been the one I would lean
on when times got bad, he would listen to
my dreams and fears the best friend I
would ever have.
But as I've grown and spread my wings
to leave his loving arms I went along my
own life’s path away from his healing charms.
As I sit alone and think of how a child
Will grow, theirs so many things about my
Life that I want my dad to know.
You were my friend my strength my will
that got me through each day.
You were my foe my enemy who would show me the right way,
The reason I have morals and believe in what is 
right.                                                     The one who took time out of his day to 
help                                                                                      me fly a kite.
The person I am the person I was the person will 
be.                                                                          I am Proud and glad, to say you are 
my
Guiding light, my inspiration my dear dad.


Details | Free verse | |

i know better

your not my dad
you only think you are
my dad isn't like you
my dad would take up for me
no matter the situation
my dad is my hero
the one i admire
the one i look up to
my dad doesn't lie nor steal from me
only honest and open  with me
my dad gives me bear hugs
and speical kisses every night before bed
my dad wants to spend time with me,
loves to be with me
and knows who i am;
good and bad
my dad says 'I LOVE YOU' every day
WITH love and care
my dad would never give up on me
because of a women
he'd find the challange in it
and take it
but never give up
never
only you are not my dad
remember?
you only think you are

i know better


Details | Free verse | |

What About Me

I was told yesterday
That someone else will come and forever stay

At first, I was a little confused
Because I didn't understand the news

A few months later, I looked at my mother
And thought to myself, 'what's happening to her?'

They tell me I can't do this or that with her
We don't have fun together anymore, I wish she'd get better

Two more months went by
Then she was rushed to the hospital with pain and I wasn't told why

My dad put me in the car and drove so fast
Finally, we reached the hospital at last

My dad ran and he ran and he ran
He went to the back while I sat with family members and waited patiently not 
knowing what's at hand

After two days of me and dad being alone
She was back home

This time with someone else
And I realize that it will no longer be me by myself

In the house they come with a little baby
They bypass me and I thought to myself, 'what about me?'

Days have gone by
And so many people have come, but passed me by

I no longer have fun with my mom and dad
So I go in my room to be alone and sad

The next day, grandma and grandpa came to see the baby
Again, I was bypassed

But this time I came out and asked
"What about me?"

Everyone was taken by surprise
I repeated myself and sat there and cried

They all came running to comfort me
And explained to me about the baby
And most of all that they didn't forget about me


Details | Free verse | |

Held on tight

   Some are lucky to never experience the HURTS 
    that I had to endure I never got to be a child
      I grew older and older after each argument 
          after each tear
         I grew up nervous 
         I don't know if god did this one purpose
            But I always felt like I was going to lose something
                 So I held on tight
                You could cut the tension with a knife
                     It was basic instincts 
                        I hoped my mom and dad would stick it out
                              for better or worse
                                   Worse I guess took over
                                   because before you knew it 
                                  my dad wasn't living with us anymore
                                        Even as a young girl I knew what that was about
                                                I had tried so hard to get them to stay
                                                   To work on their love 
                                                        I was a true daddy's girl so of course I missed him
                                                          The day my mom forgave him and let him come home
                                                                  I held him even tighter 
                                                                than you'll ever know
                                                              I think I could feel him slipping away 
                                                                   Losing touch 
                                                                   changing wave links
                                                                    Even though I tried to cuff him to my hands
                                                                       I will never understand
                                                                            The tighter I held him  
                                                                           The quicker god formulated a plan
                                                                             Than I lost him
                                                                               
                                                                     


Details | Free verse | |

I Am Somebody

Who are you, I was asked today
I started to be smart and say only my name

Again they asked who are you
But this time with a little attitude

I am a black  young lady
Soon to be graduating with my Paralegal degree
I may not be graduating to be a lawyer
But I am somebody

I may not be
The perfect liitle girl my dad wants me to be
But we both seem to agree
That I am somebody

Yes, I may not have your money
And I may not be wealthy
But my mom and dad taught me that I don't have to have big money
Just know that I am somebody

To you I may be ugly
To you I may be pretty
But watch what you call me
Because I am somebody

You may see things in my past that wasn't done perfectly
It may now even affect me
But don't be so quick to judge me
Because I am somebody

You may laugh at me
Because I don't see myself the way you see me
I may not be better than you
But I am somebody

I don't want to be the President of the United States
Or the Ambassador of an overseas country
I don't know what my future awaits
But there's one thing I do know, that I am somebody

There are days when people belittles me
Life with them must be going terribly cause they appear to have low self-esteem
And feel like a nobody
Don't try to get me on that same page 'cause I know that I am somebody

I AM SOMEBODY!!!!