back field in motion
Chose, chose, live grow leave! GO!
Leapt from heaven's gold
Jump started into a human mold
White clapboard poverty with tiger lily blooms,
blueberry rake poverty woolen looms.
Riffs of Emerson, Whitman, Longfellow dawns,
mothers’ hazel eyes, father Davidesque form,
chosen to drive twixt a Jew and a screw.
Magnet of lunacy...
Tumbled like an agate into the stream of life
part of the dream lesson
Abuser of power, one who had once roared,
Eve shaped now, weak and mewling
between the weeds of woe.
Care taken by lovers torn.
Watched over by pedophile uncles.
Befriended by lewd Father of sons.
Adult child, searching amongst the Word
for the Word is God and GOD …
There are so many words
Root ripped scenes from beauty to horror
Shiksa* taunts seep in with the smell of borsch.
A pumpkinseed amongst the pricks of Brooklyn
A wild rose planted in the asphalt soil
Jew’s bop to a Dago harmony,
bagels, bialys and the French twisted strands
of great grandma’s hair.
Clipped, stripped of family shoved whole
into yet another new mold.
True believers, ah yes, fanatics all.
The struggle to survive whole healthy
dipped in, dripped in, a bath of acid and thorazine.
Polish priests pedal platitudes to the sisters of St. Joseph
behind the gilded glory of the Church.
Raped by trust and betrayed by lovers,
a rose married to a prickles thorn,
so empathy is gained, and a healer born.
Metal must be formed in a crucible of fire
A healer can not be born without tasting the pyre.
"Slipping into a coma, the emptiness of a dreamless sleep.
Nightmares filling your head, where nothing is what it seems.
You're underground, desperately tryna' find your way out,
tunnels all around, but doors are no where to be found.
The ground has no traction, and you're floating above air.
Tryna' hold on to something, but there's nothing there.
And then you fall, and all you can hear,
is the rippling of your clothes, and the wind in your ear.
And just before you hit the ground,
you feel something grip you, without making a sound.
The next thing you know you're looking into a Man's eyes.
You feel safe but afraid, all at the same time.
That's when you wake, but you were never asleep.
And you're lying in a bed, with the Man at your feet.
He welcomes you to His kingdom, and into His heart,
and He finishes his drawing, another of piece of God's art."
This poem is about one's struggle to find God. About having to search, and feeling hopeless. Like we aren't really traveling through Hell, but we are searching with no idea which way we are going, blanketed in a coat of black. Like an infinitely deep hole with a small stream at the bottom, and you've just got to hope to find that stream. Then when you think all hope is lost, you realize that He has been sitting there, waiting for you, pulling you out of the darkness Himself, knowing you would look for Him. He accepts us into His kingdom. It's as if we are a piece of art, and he is adding on to us everyday..
His daddy is fighting in Iraq.
His mommy is fighting tears.
His brother is fighting death.
He is fighting his desolation and fears.
Friends are but a dream
and companions are an illusion.
School is a concentration camp,
but he stands, though alone, in the midst of confusion.
His training school is loneliness.
His milestones are fears, thrust in lies.
His only weapon is faith
and his bullets are soft "hallelujah" cries.
Strength left his fragile body
and he lost the fight in life so coy,
yet on his knees he conquered agony
and I call him the little soldier boy.
I am the spirit of satin stardust
and the antiquities of golden memories alive
I call to you from the rising warmth of the sun
and greet you in the misty morning light
I am the steady and rolling drum beat
echoing from the jagged heights above
I am the mysterious curves of the raging waters'
and the freedom birds of love
I rise above the white summer clouds
in lilting songs of grace
and roam with the western tail-winds
to take you home again
I am a Spirit of our gracious Lord God Almighty
of love hope and faith
I have come to tell
Dedicated To P.D.
Does the past really matter?
Does it set you free?
I’m absorbed in the sin,
That is surrounding him and me.
Lost in the curiosity,
Cold to the touch.
Drenched in the poison,
With my dignity in his clutch.
Feeling like I was cheated;
I chose the evil instead of light.
I traded in the sunshine,
For what lurks in the night.
I disobeyed his orders,
I gave up security to be unsure.
I went against the warnings,
Gave into darkness instead of remaining pure.
Once my bed was made of soft grass,
But now it is made of stone.
Was plump from all of the luscious fruit,
Now I’m starving to the bone.
My curse is one of circumstance.
The punishment a crime,
I’m stuck inside this dampened cave,
For the rest of time.
My world came crashing down,
The grief has not subsided.
My heart broke completely,
When my sons collided.
My misery a token,
From the abandonment I earned.
Upon the time spent in sorrow,
There was a lesson to be learned.
Have I found the moral?
Only in time we shall see,
For all I did was eat an apple-
From the Knowledge tree.
Return to me, O morning fresh
And you will feel my promise
Free your tears, unto me...your God
Daddy will you hold me and
Tell me I’ll be okay?
Will you whisper in my ear
All the things you used to say
Will you squeeze me tight,
And call me your little girl?
Daddy will you make me laugh
And still give me the world?
Daddy just hold me close,
Please never let me drop
Keep me under your wing,
And please never ever stop
Daddy please I’m hurt
Don’t you see me lying here
Come back and make it all okay
Please come chase away this fear
Daddy hold me close to you
I want to feel your heart
Say you’ll never ever let me go
And never say we’ll part
Tears streaming down my face
Daddy please come here
I need you more than ever now
Daddy please just hold me near
Hold me tightly in your arms
I’m begging, “please don’t let go”
I still need you Daddy
I just thought you’d like to know
Daddy please I want you
Can’t you see me cryin’?
Look daddy way down here
Your little girl is dyin’
Daddy please I’m falling now
Wont you hold me tighter?
This monster is pulling me down
Please make this burden lighter
Daddy please come help me
Can’t you hear me screaming?
Don’t leave me here now
With my tears still falling, streaming
Why don’t you look at me?
Daddy please I’m scared
You saved all the other ones
Why wont MY soul be spared
Daddy please come back
In my heart I miss you
Just comfort me Daddy please
With all the things you used too
Daddy please I miss you
And I’m at my last resort
I’m sorry, but I can’t go on
This is my sad report
Your little girl is missing
Please tell me that you see.
Why don’t you put to rest,
This pain that’s running through me
All I want is you Daddy
So please come just take me home
All I want is you Daddy
I’m so tired of being alone
Daddy why won’t you look at me
Why don’t you care?
Why did you kiss the rest?
But me you did not dare
Daddy hold me close and
Call me your little girl
Tell me it will be okay and
That you’ll still give me the world
Tell me that you love me
Just tell me that you do
And whisper in my ear
All the things you used to
Daddy please hold me closer
I’m starting to slip through
Just please don’t let me go
I can’t do all this without you
Look into my eyes and
Tell me what you see
Tell me that you care and
Still want to set me free
Daddy will you hold me
And catch all of my tears
Daddy will you help me and
Chase all of my fears
Dear merciful and gracious God
The Supreme Father of wisdom
The One who provides knowledge and understanding
The guiding light of all creation
Leader, provider, and shepherd of our fathers
I call upon You today in a mighty way
Please shed Your love of intercession on our fathers
Guide their feet while they run this race
Strengthen their hearts as they walk Your way
Cleanse their thoughts as they strive to stay on Your path
Provide them with hope as they learn to pray
Sustain them with Your love from day to day
Touch their total being as the family’s foundation
Show them wisdom to provide wise counsel
Open their hearts to impart Your values and the Gospel
Walk with them and guide their feet around sinking sand
Listen to their pleas all across Your land
Mold them as You are the potter and they are the clay
Teach them how to kneel with children and pray
Talk with them as they would with their child and family
Impart divine wisdom, knowledge, and understanding upon them
Wrap them in Your mercy and surround them with Your glory
These blessings I ask as Your humble servant
In the name of Your begotten son Jesus
The Morning Star of all creation
Singing praises to His name
Henceforth until everlasting
Bless all fathers today and always,
Author’s comments: I thank God for my father, Kenneth Spence, a great father. He was the
kind of person when the dinner table was set you don’t want to be late. His stories were
entertaining and victorious. His instructions were always helpful and meritorious and his
praises uplifting and glorious. May he rest in peace!
To be called ..
~ Grandma is a Honor ~
I have been blessed with 4 Grandchildren
~ one lays in Heaven " Kaleb " He is God's Angel ~
~ His twin brother he will always watch over , and be in his soul~
For he loved his Brother so much in the womb ,
he chose Heaven which gave life to his twin
~ I feel his spirit when I see the other Grandson ~
Time passed another gift to see
we are " Mickes" and Loved
Our Dad held the title in Baseball
~ that's how we roll ~
those children are Grandmas hero's
The Irish they love big and Family is everything
The brothers will protect the beautiful sister
~ as many lads will be calling ~
Every time my Grandson hits a home run
There will be a Angel watching proudly in the stand
It will be as if the Angel lifted him when he runs
~no one runs faster then my Grandson~
either baseball or Art ~ you shall find your gift given
These children have been blessed~
~ a beauty to hard to describe
If you think not ~~ Take a look at the Mom
That girl can stop Traffic
after raising three and still~
"Inspired by the gift and loss of Grandchildren "
May our precious " Kaleb " softly rest where Angels only Dwell
I do not know?
Who coverest Thyself with Light as a garment; who stretchest out the heavens like a curtain
Whom makest Your angels spirits; Your ministers a flaming fire
"You," whom walkest upon the wings of the wind; clothed, with Honour and Majesty ~
Crush me; that I may die unto the dust of which, I truly am
That I stand not within the ever present shadows of such, tainted beliefs....
Bound in the chains of lies; deceiving myself; this, darkeness of a blinding vanity
Lift my eyes and hold me there; "You," whom trieth the hearts and the reins of "Life"
Within Your loving hands, direct my Souls path; aside these still Waters of such, Sanctity ~
Lead me that I may live beyond this place and time; tides; alluviums allusions cast away
Walking upon the shores to breathe, the fragrance of Paradise; tears, poured from Thy bottle
Turn my deepest purest thoughts that I may forever behold, Thy unsearchable Glories....
Strengthening my humbled heart that in death knowing, I shall find Radiance of Bright ~
Standing beyond the banks of lost perdition; soon to be forgotten amid, scorching winds
Burn, this amissful spirit of perception; understanding now found upon the coals; "Salvation"
Take my softened templed hand and, lead me unto the throne of, "Everlasting Celebration"
Until the ends of All in All; surrounded, by kings and queens and princess' and, princes
Your joyous and blessed Children of, "Loves," immaculate Creations ~
Crush me that I may be; for, "You Are, 'The Most High of Gods'"....
"My, 'Dear, Beautiful Father!!!'"