**Back smile/smile Back **
With your heads way up your :]ssa[:
You will never accomplish the win
I got shots that will protect me from your rabid ways
After you fell into a non-stop falling disease,
Your movements weakened
Straight from a dried up well,
Every day you frolic in a disorder that causes more brain damage
With progressive mental retardation
You continue to lick the top of your cleft lips
He is the saddest sadist human that ever lived!
So sad he has to live with himself every night
Kissing his young ones Goodnight
In ways I can't even breathe to tell
The way he follows rabbits down the bunny hole
Killing each laughing hare
Wiping smiles, leaning in,
The madness in Alice's Wonderland
Madder and Madder The Hatter
Your boldness is nothing more than baldness
A man in a monkey suit
Molesting the minds of his idiotic circle,
Trying to kill the joy, not knowing
We don't care about his false Harvard WAY
I rather stay here dropping out, than pretending
Following his made-up perception, a cropped out waste
His taste, my best copypaste, he jacked on
A stench, they left behind when open mouths laugh
He educates by attacking women better than his own
Silently to the top of his knife, he stalks nakedly
Removing a few poems he plagiarized
His Poorness, brought many to donate to the salvation of his army
Sadness Delivered by the Joy Killing Poet and his little pigs
Cross My heart and hope to die!!!
The sweetest sounds of burning trees
A gentle stroking in the breeze
The calm has lasted past the storm
Cloudy visions, Satan’s roar
Too many sights have passed my way
A time found only in the haze
The softest screams are running bare
My aching bones creak as I stare
You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark
The battle’s started at the end
No one is coming to repent
The sinners grab their wine from prey
No judgment calling here to stay
The sport is reckless to be told
The one is laughing at his souls
It falters nowhere to be sure
The power grows forevermore
Like a spirit in the wind
I have no say in where you’ve been
But cross the line to come to me
And pay the price for ecstasy
You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark.
Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama)
Tired of explaining (a twist from ND. poem)
Ignoring the presence of my stillness==
As you walk with bitterness==
Your radiance is no longer true==
A melody with seduction over due==
The song so bad wiped out by you==
Rotating my abdomen==
From the soul==
The worms inside==
They all die==
Under your control==
Separating the way==
Is as if though==
All the beauty in the world==
Up and lived==
You are more than I need==
Drowning in my own abyss==
Judging you one==
Right after the other==
A hellish so profound==
Revelations passed so suddenly==
Expression of limbo, I replay==
Suffer catting my oxygen==
Never play the sensitive==
Feel my needs==
Like the wound full of abscess==
A sore to never go away==
Yes like the illness==
These shivers down my spine==
Identify, escape, abuse of certain==
Announcing it even more==
Proof that I am found==
Out of love==
The mind finally receives==
Revolution with open eyes==
The heart is trapped to proceed==
Cleverer than the open skies==
Old sweat glands in my hand==
Retiring the mind==
The best of my heart has no stand==
Died from your retrieving cries==
Advancing to my knowledge==
The darkness that you lend==
In the depth of your eyes ==
I run before you hypnotize==
Oblivious to the Valley of your wits==
Refusing to relive the song==
Feeling that are gone==
Never will it feel right==
I still feel the rotation==
Exhale went out your soul==
Exiting far from sight==
Revoke an end to your light==
A kiss of death to your good night==
A kiss of death to your good night==
(To: Nathan Dilts my way of explaining love over due)
A burst of white light
gamma rays, overbearing
a flash of brilliance
burns through to my soul
everything is like hell
the world starts to melt
in the blink of an eye
just the cold blackness
I don't care if I am not again
what I once was, for at this moment
I am greater now
than ever before
I took the path between
teetering, tight roping walking
right up to my right
divined in my unholy state
I thought I told you
I am your king
still you sit there, hesitating
I know you hate me
what does that mean?
I hate just about everything
still I'm chosen
I did not wish before
now bow down to me
refuse me no more
for I shall always be your demon
until you accept me as your King.
I don't even know you
though you say we used to be
best of friends, you and me
the day you ditched me
I remember now
exactly how it played out
back when we were just tiny things
even back then I still was King
you thought me stupid
just a ruse
I would laugh inside, you see?
not one of you single, mean people
ever even knew me
in a world, mostly seen to me
that is why only I can be your true King
and bring forth a new source
of light everlasting.
As two worlds collide slowly aligned
one wrapped in shadows
one bathed in white
evils swirling in the clouds above
I'll always be the king you love
to hate or despise as in your blood
I thought I told you, I am the one
I am the way, the way out shall be shown
breathe in my spirit as it carries you away
breathe in my faith it shall carry your empty space
and deposit you gently on a cloud just enough
higher than you've ever dreamed of
for I am king now, and your in my hell
your in my imagination, I'll just never tell
you'll feel as though dreaming, you'll feel now
if you try and see
you were always found the most
shared in the light cast upon me
the last bright star in heaven.
Denounce my name, if you may
One year later, still not afraid
A black sheep, a darkened spade
That's just life, I'm not right
I'm in the wrong, follow along
Like a piper, I'll pitch a song
Mesmerized, the weak wills sing
I thought he told you, he's still our king.
I hate her.
She isn't that ugly
And she has enough friends,
But i still hate her.
I hate her.
Twisting thoughts into illusions.
Illusions folding into reality,
All to escape herself.
I hate her.
All of her problems
She projects onto others
In the vain hope
That someone will wave their wand
And save her
From her fairytale nightmare.
I hate her.
All of her weird habits
And sudden depression
The way she cries about
The smallest thing
Cutting with her words.
I hate her,
This girl i see in the mirror.
I hate the fact that you've hurt me
You've burdened me
From the pits of Hell I scream in flames
I hate the fact that you left me
You scarred me
In my rage I was blinded to your games
Most of all, more than anything
I hate it that I love you
And you're everything I hate
I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know
Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know
Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that
You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know
You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand
You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel
How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door
You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me, you owe me that much
Sabrina Niday Hansel
H A T E
~I have no room to hide
the only way is to die~
I hate this world
I hate all it's made of
I lost the love inside
You are nothing but a joke,
the way you came into my life.
Why do you keep us from the truth
God do you not love us
Why do you insist on these bruises and wounds
Do you not care about the pain and the scars
Trick us with the vanity of the flower
Shower us with the poorest rain
My God where's your power
Do I also have to die for his name
Drown because of everyone else sin
All I wanted was to believe in love
Instead I opened a book of torment
What did I do to you
Why do I feel the battle is with me?
how did i get raped with hate
What happen to the wings
Why do I feel as if we are all bait
a world of no balance, I hate
I retaliate on my own hate
True love is a program even you deny
I hate the hate you put upon this world
A hate the look of poverty
resent- IS ME!
confusing the heart to feel nothing
I can't bring my self to need you
You never protected me when in need
You left me suffering alone through the deepest sea
the desert swallowed my dearest mirage
you let me down, to many times
I hate that i still talk to you
the emotions are destroyed
do you laugh at my beating pulse
you created many Nations
Meaning you gave hate to this world
making us different in every race
who else has a key of power to your master plan
I m not blind no more
I see things, the way he wants me to see
with truth you hide from me
I hate the way this world rotates
I hate the flavor of it all
I was told i was created by your hands
Not Satan's evil ways
God I hate the world you made
Why rest us in a place of love
You have my soul, but you have your fate
Whatever your words, I’m willing to take
You have my word; I’ll give you my breath
It’s like a chain that would never be break
You are my love with all my heart,
I’ll fight for you with all my might.
And in the way, you admire your goals,
You hold my hands, but not so close.
As you go to your chosen path,
I’ll accept the fact that we will be apart.
In the dark side, I leave behind
Within my faith, that you’ll arise
Please don’t look back, coz I’m fighting still
I’m hurting so much! Don’t want to have you near
I accept my fate for what it does,
I’m bleeding so much, do you know for whom it was?
You reach your goals, as you want to have,
Would you remind the man that gave what he had?
As you reach the stars, and be the one
Be a sun that shines its own.
After the rain, the rainbow comes,
Like dark in the moon, when the light flash
A glimpse from you at least a short
For then I knew my pain is worth.
I Don’t Hate America
I like the country I live in
That doesn’t mean I have to sing their songs
to prove that sh@!.
That doesn't mean that
I can just can’t get over the fact that
they murdered the people who built it
America was dedicated to a proposition that
“all men are created equal, except
for women, indians and blacks
The white men were just fine is what we were told
but what about those who were stolen that never made it over to NEW WORLD?
The ones that were thrown overboard and
those who died from sickness while in transport
Remember those who were born into slavery and never even knew what freedom was before their physical bodies left
and people like Thomas Jefferson
He understood that slavery was wrong but did not free his own until his death
What about those who beaten senseless and burned, and hanged,
All while screaming “Nigger" What’s your new name?
Oh how soon do we forget…
That’s why I despise that word and
I don’t care who it is that uses it
#u$k that slavery sh@!
And #u$k that flag b@%ch!
#u$k you America because you’ve always made things hard .
So don’t look at me strange when I show those songs disregard and those fake ass patriotic undertones about how we are the land of the free
more like the land of the captured and the Home of the Slaves, see
I don’t’ hate America
I can be and do and go as I please
But, then I remember the poor people they injected with disease
They thought they were getting free health care but the doctor is giving them syphilis
I remember the natives of this land
They slaughtered and labored them to work for freedom in their own land
I remember the Civil War
where we were a country divided by the Mason Dixon Line
The north and the south of the same country at war to save lives
I don’t hate America
This is my home
But I refuse to let the things that
my ancestors endured during the struggle of building SUCH A FINE COUNTRY be forgotten
It’s 2012 and the politicians still plottin to find a way to take away the black vote
It’s the same shit, but now they just don’t use the noose to choke the life out of souls
I’m so tired of the constitution and it’s loop holes, and amendments, and acts, and laws
This just proves that man can’t govern themselves because even with all these rules we constantly fall into the black hole deeper and deeper
I don’t hate America
I just choose to not take part in its little song and dance
I pledge my allegiance to God
and continue to write and lose myself in my poetic trans
A sweet flower's funeral
displayed in the cold months
of snowy weather and bone chilling shivers.
A sweet flower burned away, dried up;
buried six feet under.
Oh, my sweet flower,
how you once bloomed with no remorse,
like a madman blooming with beauty
and a glorious halo over your head
shinned with such power and blinding glory.
Oh my sweet flower how you have gone now,
resting in peace in the land of paradise.
Oh, my heart it is weak when I see your face,
of once beautiful smiles and warm embraces.
I can hear your crying out to be free.
Snowing and bone chilling cold ripes at my soul
and feelings of sorrow rage through my blood,
boiling my hatred to the world, for losing your
sweet and ever glorious beauty.
What I would give away, if I could be with you
one last night, one last night together
to hold you in my arms, to smell your sweet perfume
that brings back sweet memories of you and I.
What I would do to be with you,
such romance travels through my heart in the highways
of my veins in my body, love is all throughout me,
and my heart breaks when pictures of you start to collect dust.
My love for you, my sweet flower,
is still ingering through the air,
as I travel and look upon a tombstone
which shows your beautiful name.
Come to me my dear flower,
when spring comes,
come to me my dear, sweet flower.
And bloom once again,
twice as large as last year,
and ten times more beautiful then last year.
Come to me in the first months of spring
in my dreams, so I could sit and talk with you.
I miss you already,
and my heart crys,
my eyes flood with tears of sorrow.
I miss our love we shared.
warm cuddling embraces
and beautiful displayed in a picture frame.
Now I hear the tapping of raindrops on my window pane.
That is all that keeps me company,
that and the rose you gave to me
and a picture of you and me.
Love is endless, even when blue eyed Death comes to visit
and play a game of chess with us,
we all play our game, my love.
I shall go tonight
in my sleepy slumber
and dream of you in the times of our height in our love for each other.
My lost love, you are gone, resting in paradise,
but never forgotten my sweet flower.
im livin in a world, where all eyes on me.
trying to curve my own route.
but route 66 keeps finding its way to me.
ive been plenty sick, in all the events layed before me.
even when i reflect to my lowest points
i dont regret any of the choices
That I’ve deployed in my era
A lot of it by error, but hey
We live in hell conditions and there ain’t no air condition
Or any guidelines when life throws you in the sidelines
But when hindsight twenty twenty hits
You’ll begin to understand life’s a bunch of equations and you in the mix of it
An you’ll have to think twice, before running into a situation and becoming the best of it
it’s what got me here, it’s what got us here
Ran with my thoughts blazing up to her place and
Guess what happened next
She opened up heaven’s gate
And just before late I slipped out
I’m a Grown ass man
Doin his thing, waitin to blow up like an old land mine
In doin what he drools over
But time after time
Something decides to creep up and cover the light
Lost my way
Then I revoked to ever know, I ever thought that way
But in the in between time, that in the mean time
Spent a lot of time
Gettin pissed off just to medicate and lift off
Don’t need Don Perion to sip off
Already had my way with the bottle
Even thought to get back with the trouble and rejoin the hustle
That’s just what happens to a man who really knows his old ways
Whos tired of making ends meet and ponders getting back to the streets.
Memory sets in and he remembers an O.G. saying
No matter how tall your pockets stand when you ball
Eventually times gonna make you fall
And I as I pull myself together
I don’t wanna end up like the twin towers rubble
I mean no offence to nine eleven but at that time I probably could have used a reverend
But all that’s irrelevant now
because i live with a different perspective now
there you go you made it to the end :-) comment if you like, constructive criticism wanted as well.
NOTE: This poem is a humoruos stab at PMS from a mans point of view
I can see your blood boiling
through the blades I once called eyes,
they were once beautiful like jewels
now they hurt my deep insides.
cutting at my guts
and like a noose on my lungs;
your words seek like bullets
your mouth like sniper guns.
I’m hit with each inaccuracy…
Being killed by words untrue;
and you even got the nerve
to tell me what you think I do.
But let me get mad
and try to plead my case;
then suddenly the world
is a f--ked up place.
You got tears running down…
What the Hell did I do?
We were just sitting and laughing
I could swear that we were cool.
I should have seen it…
It’s Aunt Floe…,
This battle can’t be won or reasoned
I think its best I go.
Cause I hate Aunt Floe
and she hate me too;
she sit and talk sh-t
about the gum I chew.
The color of my shirt…,
She say my look is a stair;
She say my best has no worth
And she doesn’t stop there.
I didn’t change
I’ve been the same
these 28 days,
but now I’m f_ckin A__hole
Aunt Floe gave me that name.
She said get out my face
This aint your home no more,
But I’m more puzzled by
What was said before.
I love you
With her glossy eyes
I knew it was true,
But horribly sly
You see these words
make me the fool.
The one that’s cruel
That a__hole dude,
That sparked the fuel
To this f__kin feud.
But I swear to God
I didn’t start this sh_t,
Why would I give up my love
To live my life like in a pit.
This is horrible sh_t
Wasted days spent,
On nothing but the worst
I could be bathed in your sent.
You could be laughing
While I’m smiling
But Aunt Floe Won’t let this be,
And the only way to make this right
Is hold my tongue a week.
And that ain’t gone happen
I’m a person too,
But I got feelins
and don’t know what to do.
Now its been six days
She locked herself
In the room
I call it her cage.
I smell a sent in the air
It wasn’t there before,
Now lookin down the hall
I see an open door.
Is this a trap
I’ll guess I’ll see,
If I fall for another
You know that’s dumb ass me.
Curled in the bed
I think I know that girl,
But where’s the hells Aunt Floe
The one that f__ked my world.
She packed up and gone
Didn’t even say good bye,
Just came wit gang of bullsh_t
And vanished in the sky.
Is that you my dear
Can you please come here,
Listen close and crystal clear…
I hate Aunt Floe
Next time she here
Make sure I’m stocked
with weed and beer.
I love you punk. ?
To lose someone you love....
Its like trying to live violently among the peaceful people who are dying
To lose someone you love....
Its like Im living in lies with laughter and happiness while Im truthfully sitting in anger and pain while crying
Im grounded in shame yet Im still airborn with death together we flying
Its hurts when one dies past groundshaken proximity under the hate but sent with earthshattering love above
where we live to die yet we are born to survive where we bred to learn to get past all the ones we have lost with hate because ITS REALLY HURTS TO LOSE SOMEONE YOU LOVE.
Crown of Sonnets
Dam girl when Im locked up you set me free/
When Im not myself you set me free/
Im behind the lock and you got the key/
Im blind with hate but you helpmy love see/
WhenIm lot and alone you take the lead/
Without you I could have never planted my seed/
I hate to say it but you make me better/
You know I love you even without this letter/
When Im cold with sadness you my comfort warm sweater/
I know I can be a bad boyfriend but Im going to be a better father/
I might have wanted a son, but it really didnt matter because now you having my daughter/
Im guess Im too stubborn girl with me why you even bother/
my heart gets heart gets colder but for you it only gets hotter........
I Love the elderly
so full of history
I love my generation
who kept me a mystery
I love the children
who's future, now bright
for I have died for them
to capture the light
for i understand
pain more than ever
once I released it
the anger got better
as it went away from the people
and into my music
without a single
reason to prove it
without a reason
to let Love's light in
I didn't, it found me
and lesser I sin
God and my father
both let me know
it would all be okay
so very long ago
even tho the road
would be full of pricks
even back then I'd tell them
you can all suck my dick.
A single kiss from thy lovely lips,
so sweet and so divine,
yet I taste posion upon your tongue.
Your beauty so glorious,
like a blooming rose so beautiful,
yet, why do mine eyes go blind
in the sight that you walk along with another?
Yes you, walk with another,
arm under arm,
lips touching lips in romantic kisses,
it makes my blood boil,
for mine lips are dry.
For mine eyes have seen your glory,
yet no one here listens to my story.
You are evil, yes you are,
don't try to deny,
Listen to a man of experience,
you might as well save some expense.
I write of our long romantic walks
we took together, under the shade of olive trees,
how we went apple picking in autumn time,
and made love in the foyer.
Nomore of that sweet and passionate love,
nomore silent kisses in the night,
when the wind blows hard against the branches,
that tape violently on my windowpane.
Nomore somber tears shed, when you got sick,
and nomore warm embraces when you shed tears of betrayal.
Betrayal now is a game played by a fool,
such as I,
to think I'd have a happy life with you?
Huh, only a fool would think such a thing,
but now I sit, looking at the foyer,
where we once made sweet, passionate love,
nomore will that foyer be filled with exotic pleasure.
Nomore will you be filled with smiles and exotic pleasure.
I've done my job, as a good man shall do,
now pack your things and get of my stage,
the spotlight yawns for anew,
and the audience grows tired and restless of you.
Now I live life anew,
you too shall see life in new eyes,
walking hand and hand with the blond, blue eyed devil
you call your own.
Shall he take one kiss from your lips,
and die of the posion he tastes on your tongue,
shall he go blind, when he sees your true, black beauty?
He will see the ugly soul, covered up by white rags,
and cheap makeup,
and then he will come to me,
and shake my hand in condolence
and say, "You were right!"
Now you are all alone,
looking for another, as you did many times before,
Now you are alone, walking an open road,
spying on another,
fear of being alone.
Now, you see when you play games with a good man's emotions,
don't try it,
because a good man is not meant to be toyed with.
I tried to write about love but I haven’t felt it.
I tried to write about the sea but I’ve never seen it.
Then I tried to write about the air, but I have never breathed it.
I tried to write about magic but I never believed it.
I couldn’t write about god, all I have ever done is sinned.
And when I tried to write about life I found,
I have never really lived.
Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?
Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”
Rage fills my brain
As these fists come up
Anger overtakes my body
Waking the death
Upon these grounds
I bring back those
Who once stood around
Knifing your gut
Slicing your skin
I stand by
As you die
Last moments of breath
Last moments on Earth
Find your way out of step
For your kindness
As the sun sets
and the twilight comes out,
as the birds and squrriels are no where in sight.
As the whores and pimps sit on street corners,
waiting for street lights to turn from green to red.
As cadillacs stop and roll their windows down.
I can her the faint cry deep in the darkness,
of dirty gutters and dark, dead end alleyways,
I hear the faint tears fall and hit concrete pavement.
I feel the faint cries of whores,
I hear the sound of backhand hitting face
and brused tissue and broken noses are everywhere.
And the somber tears fall onto pillow cases,
and white motel bedsheets run red with blood
and cheap Italian wine.
And you can her the poet over the radio,
reading his own work for the one millionth time
and you can hear his soul slowly wanting to die.
He drowns himself in smoke and alcohol
the whore takes her pay, or spends a night in a jail cell,
the pimp nowhere to be found,
with a shiny blade stuck deep in his gut.
And the somber tears fall gently on the concrete pavement,
the floors of a jail cell,
tears on the pillow case and tears on a lonesome stage.
Tears never present, but are seen by many,
pain aches and pain takes away,
and I pour one more drink for the whore.
She takes me away,
and I caught her salty, somber tear,
and she crawled into my warm embrace.
I was the one who stuck the blade in the gut of that pimp,
who broke her nose and made her bleed,
with a cowardess and souless backhand.
I walk into the moonlight,
hearing the somber tears all around me,
crash violently to the concrete pavement.
The Earth rumbles and erupts with these tears,
that are shead for fellow Men, and Women and Children,
but we all look at ourselves and smile.
Happy we don't pay rent,
happy we don't have cancer,
happy we aren't six feet under;
But we still all cry,
Somber tears all fall in one big wave
crashing violently on the concrete pavement.
Now the red light turns green,
and the traffic moves along,
the whore is still at her corner,
the pimp still with the blade in his gut.
3 o’clock in the morning…
The sounds of bed frames hitting drywall,
The sounds of Chopin and Coltrane played
With a hint of sadness in tone.
Sounds of whores and pimps arguing;
“Where is the money, you whore?!”
“I don’t have the money!”
A sound of a slap to the face
A big hand crushing bone,
Red streaks on white walls.
The sound of drunks walking gloomy streets,
Police and ambulance rush down burned out streets
Sirens wailing, crying out!
A child, six years old
Crying, “Momma! Momma!”
Shedding tears over his dying mother, lost her soul to the
Rest In Peace.
A sound of a .357 magnum revolver click
And a gunshot shakes the nerves of many,
And for a moment the sweet and peaceful silence.
“Dispatch, suicide on 46th street Hollywood Boulevard, Send the Corner. Over.”
Then the darkness sails over
And the entire cities are showered with tears from the heavens,
But no one weeps,
Not a single soul…
I was his friend from the first time he opened his eyes
I taught his his first words
We took our first steps together his first and my second time around learning to walk
you see for me he was my whole world
I flip my truck three times when I was just two months pregnant with him you see
I spent seven months in bed getting him here and then another year in a wheelchair
being push by me with him in my lap cause I wouldn't let anybody take him from
I fought tooth and nail to walk so nobody could claim me unfit
I change my baby, bathed him,fed him and god bless him too and he grew
He weighted in at 30 lb. and 30" when he turn about 2 so I knew God was in the house
This child was special he was god's child on loan from god he knew so much about the bible we took him to the lords house everywhere if it was at the fort mims reenacnmet he knew what the preacher left out but I didn't
As he grew about 12 yrs. something happen and I don't know why but he told me mommy I don't love you anymore
I have tried to be his friend he won't let me in
I cry at night I wish I knew what happen to us
I know I got brain cancer and had brain surgery but I had not fully recovered
And unless thats what cause this rejection of me
I hope it isn't because he can't deal with loosing me
He is 26 yrs. old and I lost him many years ago
no doubt sympathetic poured in exceeding a ton
sans the reverberations from the supposed terroristic act doth stun
although neither a native bostonian son nor one who opts to run
my track record racks up with any manner of pun
yet only tears for deadly explosions
and incalculable loss of limb it less life barring none
when cataclysmic dynamic explosions occurred around 3:00 p.m. on mon
day april 15th, 2013
with inexplicable psychic
piercing pain punctured as with countless gun
near bunker hill where american revolution
bred battles for freedom bought
from colonial americans feverish cry for independence caught
with blood, sweat and tears of lexington and concord fought
with nada one justifiable reason and now motive sought
but...when perpetrator identified justice will be taught
adhering the state motto
"By the sword we seek peace, but peace only under liberty"
for religious or those of secular beliefs
whose lives rent asunder with grievous heartbreak wrought
despite the race, religion or creed
of those mortally hurt and/or killed, i feel such heinous deed
only the mindset of a live googly eyed yahoo doth feed
with relish the innocent lives forever he/she now gloating with glee
as a miser with greed
at what august athletes (suffering les miserable’s) lack any wherewithal to heed
for who could foresee where a twisted mind or two would lead
ambitious disciplined bodies would so suddenly need
triage with others on the sidelines to plead
for desperate intervention with utmost speed
heard by ordinary folk now cast as heroes
bursting forth like a hardy weed.
the negro is inferno. doomed for hell. sinful with lost indulging in their own ignorance. made into a reincarnation of the devils wishes. the devils wants the devils needs. they say the pigment is the reason. but i say Jesus is the reason for the devilish seasons excuse my blatant response to the evils that have been done in the name of the SON. the inferno negro is the movie of this country, always watched and critic-ed. you must understand that self hating is very wicced, misunderstood when you walk through a suburban neighboorhood the devil is screaming conform!! conformm!! inferno negro you dont belong so just get along, even if the devil knows. the devil knows your story and your weakness and he lives behind and inside the so called supremacy system we live within. peace inferno negro know thyself for you are so lost in this Babylonia hell.
Maelstrom, O thou devil
Slither past last March then unto April
Into the eves and ides of May
Thou cannot hide, but thou wilt try
To disguise thy age old blackness
Forsake what once were brighter skies
Stranglehold; sane extraction
And the spills of night
A new tone deafness
Burning oil; sentiment molasses
Bringing storms that cloud minds human and fragile
Spheres of moonlit halos
Become, no more than serpent spies
Peeking through faultlines of life
Dancing about to the madness limbo
One lost soul...
Shipwrecks against a sea
And there too does the twist of tango
Eyes of the deep; tentacles, touching me
Elsewhere, the raven flies repetition
Into glass windows
Blood stains upon a faceless mask
Drowns out the cries and the conscience
Of feathers blacker that lie strewn
Are the questions I have asked
And the answers I cannot have
Let slip feigned breath of man beneath
A gargle from the cold tunnel brine
What's left surrenders alter to its evil
And nothing is, to evermore survive
And the eves and ides of May
Are Saran gas upon a mass of land
Men of desparation hunger
Eating flesh of man much meeker
And thou wilst not again
Glimpse thy rival sun
Nor when it comes, goes
Or finality, when it finds its done
Inspired by the madness of Poe
That which is locked within us all
A risky side
A twisted mind
He's a man with sorrow
He's a man on his own
I know your secrets
I see you losing control
I want you back
Oh I want you back home
To kill your sore
To purify your soul
But not a glimmer of hope
And not a glimmer of joy
You walk with a frozen heart
Making it hard for me
To leave you alone
Your nonsensical twist
Makes me shiver inside
The more mysterious he gets
The more attractive it gets
But not a glimmer of hope
Not a glimmer of joy
Your fatal deadly thoughts
Make me scream for more
I can never show, how much my love
For you was strong
But you're the one I blame
I'm craving on saving you
So I can slay you on my own
I try to forget,
But I find myself with regrets
You looked at me and said it straight
With no circles to spin
Baby turning the page,
Will lead us nowhere...
But not a glimmer of hope
Nor a glimmer of joy
I know your secrets
I see losing control
You're the one I blame
You're the one I crave.
**please feel free to correct and comment! :) ** MS-
I do not know?
Cry to your mother as she is the only one
That will listen to your tears of how things are run
How can we expect to move on
When we live in the past of how it was done
Get over it my friend before it resorts to guns
Your ignorance of living in the past
Is what is killing your son
How can you expect the next generation to let go
If you hold on, be a bigger man so now show
Stop blaming our ancestors actions on us
If it were up to me I would rewrite history with lust
And have it shift so we can all be free
But this is not a land of cotton candy
We cant eat the houses made from sugar
But I can save the world from your blind hatred towards her
So stop being a bigot when saying "release me"
When you have not released yourself from history
Every race and religion has served their time
To the dictators and rulers of insane prime
We have all died and were punished for a crime
That we did not commit just based on our backround
So again stop spreading more hate based on this
We are all brothers in retrospect when you remove your hiss
For a snake is what you are untl you realize your bliss
I feel sorry for you you blind f$ck, the bus you just missed
Was the one towards freedom but your to busy
Weaving your own dismiss............
Stupid reverse racist bastard, cry me a river.......
Dont raise your child to hate me cause of my ancestors actions
What you are doing is the reverse of the factions
Put it place in this land of free
But I am sure with your bigotry you disagree
Cry me a river.......
Then drown in it.......
stupid from stupid
tarot read child and people
the fool in the world
When a man cries himself to sleep,
it is a sad sight to see,
tears roll off his cheek
and onto his bed sheets and pillow case.
When you hear his somber cries,
you can feel his pain
when he wimpers like a child who treds in fear.
No one knows what they do to a man
when they play with his emotions,
lead him on,
take advantage of him.
They don't know what they do to an innocent man
looking for love.
They break his heart that is full of love,
they stab him in the back
when he needs them at his most vulnerable moment
they laugh at him, and tease him,
Do they know what they do to a man?
They slowly kill a man, who just wants a simple kiss on the lips,
they kill a dreamer, a good man, with a big heart.
They drive a man to his bed,
with tears running down his face
and force him to dream of nightmares.
When a man cries himself to sleep,
it is that saddest thing to see.
Goodnight and sweet dreams...
Death, it is a sad way to go,
to leave this earth, dressed in your Sunday best
While faces surround you with tears
breaking the barriers of their emotions
tearing their hearts apart, looking down
upon my stone face, upon the face, lays a simplistic smile
that shows no emotion, no teeth, no life.
Death, it is a sad way to go.
People hurry, say their goodbyes,
but when your alive,
they never come around, they never call, they never even think
of you and how you are feeling.
While you walk the streets, with a smile on your face,
nothing but knives stick sharpe in my back and gossip
burns a hole in my soul and heart;
but I keep on walking and smiling.
I keep rolling on through like a summer hurricane
tears apart a coastal city in the heat of June weather,
Walking till death comes to shake my hand and grin at my soul.
Then as you lay their in your casket
with a buqouet of your favorite flowers, (Roses and Tulips)
they sit around you, the same faces, the same blind eyes
and they all shed tears and says good things.
Too late for that don't you think?
Death, it is a sad way to go, but what relief you get,
when finally departing in peace and leaving the drama
and careless people in your life.
After I am put six feet under, a week of crying passes,
After two weeks I am lost and long forgotten,
nothing but a stone at my cranium to keep me company
and my new friends, who sleep along next to me.
Dead and forgotten, but the dead never forget their fellow lost souls.
Only the living forget such souls that were so good to them,
now they are gone,
I am gone.
How do you feel, now that I am gone?
Death, it is a sad way to go, but what peace you recieve in Paradise.
We have all lost our way
To see starlight gazers
And men with broken hearts,
Seeking love in all of the wrong places;
Vacant lots, where women all looking for something,
But not quite knowing what they look for.
We have all lost our way.
The only hope of humanity
Is the shining sun
That breaks through the blinds of my window,
And the faint memory of me and her
Lying on our backs in a grassy meadow,
Looked up and counted stars.
Cities burn away,
Sky, stars, moon, sun all burn away;
The grassy meadow
Where we once lay, all burns away
Everything burns away,
Memory and desire and love all burn away
With the snap of a finger, and a new man
In her own life,
And I burn away.
A picture of her hung high and praised,
A picture of me, in a dark box
That collects dust, in some lonesome
And dusty, cobweb infested attic.
And I burn away with a new day.
I burn away.
A nightmare that I can’t awake from,
It is endless and repeats
When thoughts of her are all over my mind,
I cannot take such nightmarish reality
Too see her and smile,
And she walks away without a trace
Of ever returning.
And I cry,
And I burn away,
The tears wash the fire away,
And turn me to ash,
The wind picks me up and takes me away.
And for one peaceful moment,
I do not cry,
I do not burn away.
For a moment I am happy
And I smile,
And go away for a while
And let them all sleep in peace.
When someone you love,
is friends with someone you hate.
They break your trust,
They hurt you,
They stab you in the back.
They want to forget about you,
Because they're fed up of you,
They ignore you by,
Just walking away.
Parents are like that,
One minute they're fighting for you,
Then the next they're against you.
Don't you hate when that happens?
First they love you,
with all their heart,
Then after a few minor mistakes,
They start to hate you.
Aren't they supposed to always love you?
No matter what you do?
Nope, some do,
But the majority doesn't,
Parents are biased,
to either their youngest child,
or the people that is,
outside in society.
They care more,
about fame and fortune
than the fate and destinies,
of the children they have.
There is too much hurt,
In this small world,
if only we could,
get rid of it.
"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one.
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed.
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent.
A meager thought
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows,
Hate is demonic
Hate is the war against love
The foundation of the act of war
When one hate
Is mind is demonic
As his act is evil
All from hate
Oh let live spiritual
For in spirituality
is the Art of love
Hate is demonic
Love and hate
Are like two ways
If you need a reason
Why choice exist in life
Here you have an answer
And here I could understand
When one chose one of
This ways he live to war with
Even when you live with love
You still will hate evil
For evil is of hate as
hate is demonic
Oh let live spiritual
For in spirituality
Is the art of love
Hate is demonic
In the heart of a man
Covered with hate
You hear demon
Speak as he speak
You see demon
Clearly as his acts
Are full of evil
While he show hate
Demon is produce from
An evil force that is not
Demons live among us
For one that fails to love
Hate is demonic
Oh let live spiritual
For in spirituality
Is the art of love
Deep breath to shake it
Cold chill slivers down fast
Beating against cage of heart
Cage of body
Cage of soul
Legs begging to run
Heart aching to be free
Truth to self
aching to be seen
Sweet scent of dry savannah plains
Sharp smell of thorny veins
The aroma of Africa surrounds
Scents sights sounds
In these home is found
Snarling at every motion made
Scared but defiant
Blinded by fear and rage
Paws long for endless journeys
On paths walked centuries ago
For elegance in element
A space all her own
Where earth still bleeds red on horizon
Morning and night
Continuing the endless fight
Fight for borderless freedom
The pale yellow green eyes
Dismays the truth inside
But tell the story
Of wild soul
Story to unfold
before many of us chose to walk on a sanctified journey in life
we were always frustrated, discombobulated and looking for a fight
the kind of fight that was fueled by jealousy, pettiness, anger and/or greed
but now as disciples of Christ we fight for honor, a cause or a need
no longer do we fight using profanity, knives, fists or guns
we now fight with weapons that are spiritual ones
we no longer look for excuses not to get involved with a cause
we no longer allow the hopeless opinions of others to make us stop and pause
if you can't help just don't hinder and don't hurt those who are ready to fight
get out of the way and allow God's people to do what is good and right
when those of us who share a common pain are more than willing to lend a hand
that's when you encounter the haters who will try to impede your plans
hate is that emotion that everyone has experienced at least once in life
hate is a demonic spirit that does nothing but cause havoc and strife
hate is within each of us but we all don't let it manifest
for as true children of the most high God we know that we are blessed
hate comes from that inner fear caused by not being in the know
but you can't allow fear to turn into hate just let the God in you now show
for fear can paralyze, it can traumatize, fear can make you become paranoid
fear can make you ill, it can take away your will and make you null and void
we know that as disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ
everyday we are in the fight of our lives
as the devil will try to intercede and give you a short term loss of memory
so make sure you pray everyday to be reminded of the God who gave life to thee
for God can take that hate and turn it into kindness
God can take that fear and render it spineless
God gave you the power to fight for what you believe
God gave you the ability to fight for what you can achieve
so are you ready to fight in order to be set free?
are you ready to fight for a cause and your family?
Nehemiah and his men attempted to rebuild those torn down walls
when the haters came around hoping they would stumble and fall
but the Spirit revealed to them what the haters had planned
so Nehemiah and his men were ready and prepared to take their stand
they were ready to fight to protect and defend those walls
they were ready to fight so that their work would not be stalled
ready to fight, ready to fight for righteous cause
no time to ponder, nor procrastinate and no time to stop and pause
all man are born equal
Its how god wants us to be
and live in peace and harmony
for the goodness of humanity
Adam and eve are our parents
And we are their children
So why are their so many wars
That seem to have no end
We know there’re only one god
And he loves all of us
and yes we see people suffering
but in god works we have to trust
we see the holocaust in Europe
the genocides in Africa
the inhumane captivity of Palestine
and mass murders in south America
and although our tears falls
like the rain from the skies
every time we see bombs falls
and parents holds their dead and cries
how did this world become so
why do people hate each other
if Adam and eve is our parents
are you not sister and I’m your brother
today I’m preparing for thanks giving
last week I celebrated dewali
then will come seven nights of Hanukkah
the same time I light my Christmas tree
then for holy month Ramadan
I keep fast for all most everyday
And give donations to the mosque
For the poor who comes to pray
Will our world ever change
Its what we hear all the time
When its full of hypocrites governments
Committing Genocides and hate crimes
But we all are so helpless
While we stands aside and look
But it’s the prophesies being fulfill
That is written in the holy book
But these things will come to past
Children having children
False prophets using Jesus name
Men marrying men
people flying like birds in the sky
weapons of mass destructions
man bringing this world
on the brink of annihilations
some times I feel to stop writing
and close my eyes to what’s around me
but then I think of those without voice
that world forgets so easily
so if I throw away my pens
Comes like I turn my back their problems
Although I cant lead them out the dark
I can shed some light on them
In this world of live do God give or do God spend.
In god we trust your money make your life bless for best. Pay why when die heaven give no money life. Said of game now dont take da words an miss name da fame. smh. Cause this world is vein, so i bleed outside to water my mainstream of heart filled out the box of art. A gift is but live so a gift is what give. Present I wake no mistake to my take of day, now I play a one way ticket of gold with sweet palace like chocolate for da kids an family. Can't stand it, well dat make manish no planish; know how to stand it. Nerves get on some badish. Then handle all debts publick an private no childish just so wildish. Judge me not 4 i break only da law of da land with out a sight of the man. Then I walk out this cell knowing every step I take is hell to heaven.
Help me for i want to know
Although to know for me is to be free
But not by all men, but by my freedom
I have been lying in this gutter world
Wondering why i cannot get up
Perhaps fight my way to the freedom land
Where i see all men work and walk in pleasure
Yet the more i see all men walk pleasurably on the land
I hate the morning that raise me down through the donjourn land
Early that morning i found out
That inside this donjourn is where most people in our world belongs
Funny enough is it in cry
As i found out that we have the same believe, share faith, one same blame
It is their fault; they are responsible for the big world in the gutter
I know that during the beginning there was no gutter
Infact, the world indeed was built without shallow pit
And ground of merciless abode as ours
Yet for men to be happy and share wickedness
They built this absurd kingdom
Every time i see one in the land kingdom and beg for their help
They have a recitation that made me believe
That their world is a world of same slogan, one belief
How did you manage to end up here
Find your way up, i have a lot on my hand
Yet the hand seems free, less occupy i swear
Although, it is a question and a little confusing answer
But sure painful, also a heart sincere message
A rather two edge sword
Our kingdom always dash the pains away
With the normal consolation word
I know they will all deny the charge
That we happen to exist here does not mean that we will end up here
One day i know by our complain and the God that put us here
By our side, we will at the end of the day join the land mob
But the space of time and what they are doing
And the endurance of the complain in them
Made me hate them by their will
In them i see much difference from me
Their will and my will, their see and my see
Have a lot of gap than our appearance
In theirs’, there is no way
In mine, there are ways
But i only want to find out the time
And if possible know how to break quick
To become the lord and king in the land kingdom
Early word by the land kingdom friend
Made me know that i hold my freedom
I was once like you but i never believe what you people says
And that is what led me to the land kingdom
I always think more than the land kingdom
One more mystery that no one knows
I think like the God that created all kingdom
I'm of to my journey,
Knowing that the world will not show me mercy.
These witches wanting to curse me,
These demons wanting to control me,
And this devil wanting to kill me.
This is a war I have to battle without an army.
No weapons, no supplies,
Just the skills that God gave me.
I been through things that should drive me crazy.
I don't let it fade me,
I don't let it make me,
I made it hate me.
Don't be shady,
Don't hate me because you think I'm badly.
I could of been worse,
So be happy.
That I'm not smoking, drinking, killing, stealing, or raping.
I'm just killing myself every time I wake up.
It's my journey not yours so SHUT UP-Mario Perez
Confiscate the blood shade
What map in world is your interest
How its divided borders of hate to bring a meal its own people
Spring Rise or Nuke evils or grater dear friend state
Are they our priority to put the hot meal in family table
In middle all paying high price and no clue at all
Denounce hate born to dead we're all peaceful
Once please more focus the people its own land.
I do not know?
Take my hand victims of hate don’t be afraid
I’ll pull you up and away from this place
Come with me into the night
We will walk down lanes of soft moon light
Come to me lonely souls
Fight for your right to be heard
Open your eyes sunshine
Day light has casted a hazy glow
Were not alone
Others walk this hidden path as well
Put down the knifes that carve your flesh
Sew up the wounds that bleed and fester with loves string
Take their hands
Hold them tight
Reassure the need to stay
For we all fear the fall back into abandonment
Cradle the young left on the streets
Fill their hunger by staying with in arms reach
Let us walk as one
A line that reaches shore to shore
For we are strong and loved
When we remember are hand are linked as one
Let your feet stomp down hate
Your hart sing songs of strength
Don’t let genocide harts think their forgotten
Let them find sanctuary in are rebel arms
For hatred has wounded and scared us all
Take them up and sooth their fears
Listen to their stories of war in time when it seems so unfair
Do not weep alone my loves
Let your tears falls on the shoulders of use that have healed some
Rubbing your back to sooth cocking sobs
We all must weep when things have become too much to bear
For you are not alone nor week
Even when others pass over you as if you’re unseen
So to all my passer bys
And you that pray upon the “week”
I can not hate that what you are
But I will rebel agents that what you do
For us who you hate and torment out number you
One day you will feel the wrath of what hate can do
And when you do…………..
Even you may join are line
For even you will cry
Even you will feel alone
Even you will one day want to die
Perhaps you all ready do
Perhaps now you see
We all need love
Love from and for each other
We are all human
barbwire fingers and razor blade kisses i touch you're face and kiss you're neck its never
more then once for fear that you will leave and never be seen again. when you found me i
was whole and you hollowed me out now a shell i can't be with out you i was there standing
and we danced to the wrist-cutter fun land ,you took me to the hustlers hide out and we
watched the masses you saw your self and we left to the sounds of a nation dying under
your curse i am the one who ignited the enlighten to be all they could be in a world of
self hate and when the rum spilled you found it was not your own I'm your toy and your my
pet now we watch the world burn and the cities fall to giant shadows full of hate and fear
when you find what i found you will be the next victim of your own hand you have no choice
but i don't want to let you go and you leave and its just me now i have you next to me i
wish i could see what will happen next but you are leaving now and there you are catching
a bus to the next lost soul in a hideout no one can find even for the first time you find
you shell and you refill it to the beat of body hitting the wall is you mind you're doing
it right in my eyes you see what it really is and you find what he was looking for and
never told him he's still looking and i have seen what you wanted no I'm yours and i don't
want it any other way ...........
God gave me you, was are song.
I wonder what I did wrong.
I wish our relation would of last forever long.
It's hard to act like nothing is wrong and hard to act strong.
I hate what are friendship has become.
I hate the guy I have become.
Without you I'm not the same.
I didn't know someone missing in my life, make my life change.
I think about you and when I pray it's hard to not say your name.
I can't stand this pain.
It's killing me and making me go derange.
They say this chapter is done and I have to turn the page.
Put I want to read it and make life fade-Mario Perez
I do not know?
Battle lines are drawn with no word uttered to act,
just a couple of simple emotions pain and loss fuel this fact.
Bloodshed on the people we thought we could trust,
but now we know this is not true, as we lay our kin in the earth’s crust.
Vengeance is the fuel that fans the emotions of loss into hate,
for now it is not them but us that will decide their fate.
Call to arms the ones that have laid your brother to rest,
and in our embrace of steel find out who is the best.
When blood stains the ground and the hate sets fire to this land,
lets see past the smoke to who will finally stand.
In heated conflict our dance of steel and flesh will warship Aries the god of war,
and we will tear one another apart until we are no more.
Through the years our generation will hate the others without cause or reason,
For as the crimson moon passes it start another killing season.
Hate will boil and bodies will come under the knife,
and we shall take liberties on each other’s lands and wife.
All this pain will usher in a mindt Earth is a living hell,
and we will become prisoners within our own hated cell.
So before you step over line and fuel what you know is to pass,
lets buried our love ones together in the same mass.
After that, talk to me and so this could never happen while we our alive,
for if we don’t, in the future it could be us that will not survive.
I do not know?
Opening up was the best thing I could have ever did
All those things that made me & embarrassed me as a kid
You never looked at me different because my past was shameful
Talked to you about some of the things in my life that we’re still painful
I am human, filled with emotions and lots of anger
Hate filled my heart to the point I wanted to lock it in a chamber
How I feel is as real and emotional as it gets
Stress consumed me for years, felt like I needed a cigarette
Needless to say the battle has been done
I’m still standing and breathing so I must have won
The ultimate prize of keeping my sanity and myself free
Love the fact my past is so messed up… It really made me
You I give the ultimate credit for finding my inner voice
Felt like with you I have to write, it really leaves me no choice
I am a woman, blemished, flawed and tortured by life
Invisible wounds on my heart from being cut by life’s knife
But still I stand and hold my head up High
I only have one life and I refuse to give up and Die
I am woman, lover, and loyal friend till this life takes me away
I only wish I could have told you all the things I wanted to say
I understand that people are placed in life for all types of reasons
With you I guess it was only meant for a season
Learned a lot about myself with the help of you
You embraced me with ease and had no clue
Life had killed me, left me emotionally dead
Then I met you, felt like the best thing I never had
The make up of me is so complex, guarded & sad
I’m learning to let go of it all, no more hanging on to the past
All those people that did wrong by me can officially get a rash
Living for me now so I gives no care how you feel
This is me, uncut, uncensored… I feel the need to be real
No longer taking my past and feeling sorry for how it was
Living life to the fullest… Just like everyone else does
Don’t feel sorry for me I am no longer a victim, I’m Free
Just letting the world know I am no longer ashamed of being me
The mirror I used to run from I now embrace
The hate that was once in my heart has now been replaced
That frown that I always wore because if hurt to smile
I keep this smile permanently embedded and it’s going to be here for a while
I am no longer sad…. I’m so focused on my life and moving forward
Carrying all that hate and anger around was such a burden
Free..Free.. Free from life’s tortures and Pain
Standing on my own two feet with a smile is how I will remain
Why cant I get over what you've done?
Acceptance they say will help, it happened over twenty years ago.
Why did you not think? How your actions and decisions have destroyeed my heart and mind.
You were young and lost, you admit it was wrong.
Why oh why am I LIVING WITH YOUR ACTIONS? I hate it, I hate you yet I loveyou.
The shame and anxiety. The strangeness of it all.
I am inocent yet why am I doing my own headin?
People ask me about you, I hate answering their questions.
Why did she leave
why did she go
I guess I guess i'll never know.
To see you change so drastically I find the whole think quite gharstly.
Dont tell me how to feel dont tellme im wrong.
The past will stay with me till the day that im gone.
They say the past makes you who you are, it was the shock and the truma.
I know you suffered too yet part off me can never forgivce you.
Im not wrong it's me who suffers night after night. Remembering the awful things no kid should see, I feel ashamed and embarrassed.
This happened to me and it still lives on inside me.
You were supposed to me my role model
to be their yet you were out with him.
I was so lonely
I became a strange and anxious child.
You never asked how are you feeling it wasa always about you.
Yes you broke up the family and it as tore my heart apart.
Form a clean healthy conscious
then a hero is made
best when done in
your own special way
I'd like to say
I've saved myself
my mental health
is beyond repair
often I'm just not all there
I don't have any fears
but I still get scared
All this talk of good and evil
liars are the holiest of men
they can trick you
if you let them in
I'm so paranoid
is that too a sin?
It's okay to not like me
but please don't hate me
because I'd hate for you
to waste that on me
I am just a little off beat
with good intentions
I make each statement
seem so pretentious
so you'll never believe
a word I say
I don't say much anyway
I speak in riddles
I think in rhyme
a good escape route
so hard to find
you lost your marbles
and now their mine
your so engaged in commitments
it should be a crime
live free now or you'll lose more time
As you do,
Youre claiming everything that I am
Youre seeing it all
Not just the physical;
(Even though thats just as hard),
But youre seeing what makes me
Who I am;
Youre stripping away layers of hurt
And pain in many areas;
Youre touching raw spots.
As you do this;
Youre stripping me emotionally;
Im letting you inside
By letting you see my body;
Im saying I want you everywhere;
Inside and out;
I want you to soothe
The unsoothable parts
Im letting you feel me,
Do whatever you want...
Ive never known that kind of intimacy;
On the inside
Im so afraid
Youre going to see something
You dont like,
Or dont want,
And that terrifies me;
The fact that you could hate something about me
And that could be a reason
To leave me...
I feel so insecure
And I dont like it at all;
For your sake as much as mine.
I want you so badly,
I want to let you in,
Cuz I love you so much,
And youre the only person
I would let do this.
But I freeze up sometimes;
I dont know what to say,
I dont know how to feel;
Im just paralyzed with fear
I hate that I didnt go all the way for you;
I feel like I don’t give you everything I want to;
And it sucks, like I don’t feel good enough
And that you almost resent that
Im sorry, Baby for not giving it all
But it takes time I guess...
I dont know;
I want so bad to let you 'strip me'
Maybe next time I wont be so scared;
Its not you Im scared of;
Whats going on in my head,
That I cant even explain;
Im scared Im not good enough
And for myself...
That sounds messed up,
I hate that Im scared,
Scared of putting myself out in the open
Completely like that...
It takes more courage than I have;
Maybe I can get that courage from you...
I want to...
I know I can...
A song can be heard tonight
Swirling about me beating down my strength
Enfolding the whole of me with thick, terrifying captivation
That chokes a city with the roaring thunder of despair
Of the innocent obliterated in the unforgettable heartbeat
When we died with our friends and families
Slain from the once impossible that shattered our world
Tossed aside the veil of our innocence forever
I can stand no more and I fall
My weary gaze heavenward for I have no answers
With my heart weeping, my soul burning
My mind alive with a desperately hungry vengeance
I scream out all of my searing pain
I scream out with every fibre, every pore of my being!
I scream blinded by this maelstrom of emotion
I SCREAM AND I SCREAM . . !
Until my voice runs ragged
Until my anger simmers
And here amid a shattered ruin
I find inside the depths of my soul . . .
That which is fierce in us all
I stand and glare beyond the horizon
Where I know the object of my hatred hides
Feeling safe in his pit of woe
“No,” I seethe
“No,” I burn
“No!” I say through clenched teeth
“I will not falter!
I will not give up!
I will not give into the swallowing lament of night!
I WILL NOT LET YOU BREAK ME!
I will see you held accountable
I will and I do defy you!!
I DEFY YOU!
And everything you represent!”
I . . .
I like my people, believe in a merciful God
Our Lord forgives and loves us all
And this is the God I believe in . . .
But I am a man, just a man . . .
And I cannot forgive you for this, I will not
God may forgive you
But I do not
I . . .
I hate you!
For the lives you have destroyed!
For the fear in my heart!
I hate you for existing . . .
I hate you because now I cannot help but to hate something
It’s lonely where these towers have fallen
And in this solitude I pick up a stone
I move another stone and then another
For I know not what else to do
I find that this stone is not a part of the rubble
I understand that I am not really clearing debris
I am rebuilding
And this dust covered stone now within my hands
Is the first
In a new foundation of our lives
I see my friends
Doing as I do, lifting one stone after another
We are rebuilding our world
And I whisper to the horizon
Today we mourned as people grieving for our loved one
Tonight we mourn as a race having just lost our innocence
Tomorrow we will mourn as people defiled by atrocity one last time
But soon . . .
We will weep and mourn no more
And on that day
We will end terror.”
DO you want to know what i hate ? i hate how when a man sleeps with a whole bunch of girls
hes a pimp and master like a god to men and women but when a woman does the same shes a
whore slut or even a piece a trash and women call them th same first of all its wrong and
second is that is totally sexism so next time you are sleeping with a whole bunch of
girls and your girl does the same before you call her a slut or anything think you did
the same exact thing also another thing is when a girl does a sport or there is just a
girls sport its dumb but oh no not a guys its so mean and cruel listen guys if a women
does the same thing as a guy ITS THE SAME THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SO unless you men or women have a better reason to make me say oh there different well
then tell me cause its really ticking me off
Why would you believe in me why would you trust me I build you up to knock you
down I love you but I will not stand my ground. You know me all to well certain
things I wish you wouldn't tell, I hate you in the same breath I find solace in your
bed I crept. You give me strength when you hurt me you give me hope not
deserving you rain on me to shine on you in hopes of my return to you. But I must
tell you never again will I be sucked into your life of sin the drama is to much the
pain drives me insane. Darken my sun for your own sick fun my cold heart only
just begun, enough I'm done play time is over gosh I hate you, you sorry excuse
your time is up karma will come home to roost.
society has fallen under the spell of celebrities, the famous and the rich
an unhealthy obsession and fascination that has got people bewitched
more focused on style and material wealth
unconcerned about maintaining spiritual health
for it does not matter what designer's label that one wears
if one is stressed, strung out and struggling with the spirit of fear
it's not about how much money, fame and sex one can acquire
it's about how much and the way in which you love those whom you admire
the Simons in this world are always trying to cast spells
with propaganda and commercials about the things they desire to sell
but the formula for spiritual survival
is found in the Lord God's Holy Bible
to love the Lord with all thine heart
was the message that Phillip came to impart
to subtract hate from every aspect of your life
to be compassionate like our savior Jesus Christ
to multiply goodness by spreading it all around
to lift each other up to stand on higher ground
to divine the truth in no matter what you have heard
to disregard the pressures of this money mad world
to meditate on the Holy Word day and night
and then pray for everything to come out just right
so look out for the Simons who taunt, tease and titillate
look out for the Simons who abuse, hate and discriminate
look out for the Simons the masters of trickery and voodoo
look out for the Simons in this world for they'll put a spell on you
I do not know?
I got the message
Long before we knew
There was little chance
Of us meeting at all
When I first saw you
By zephyr via zest
As I tried to keep composure
I heard you say
Without a sound
"It was an accident"
And I knew
We would get close
It appears to be a
Midwest love affair
I bend thoughts
When I am bored
It always leads
Or to the floor
Can we fake it
That people don't make believe
That I'm not loving
It makes me sick
I doubt you believe them
I believe in you
All I can do
Is close my eyes
Cross my arms
Hope not to die
As I see an angel
In the perimeter
Of my eyes
Much time goes by
With no velocity
Empty headed dreaming
Till I don't realize it
Just when I had forgotten
I get woken up
By a sound
Long winds of promises
That sound the same
Till far away
It then metamorphosis into
An aura of
Zany exponential changes
Without the reign
Of every moment
There is nothing different
Nothing the same
"It was an accident
With accidents you never know"
That’s why I say
There be a need
Or at least potential to say
"You are my number one"
Rumors start to rise
Did I truly do
Something that immoral
To hate me that much
They hate me
It sickens me
And scares them
The one I
Believe is cute
Cause they don't listen
To what I have to say
So I don't...
You hit the road
And delivered me
Into an ocean
Did you know
I can’t swim
In the silent ocean
Your reading this
Your not around
All I can do
Is cross my arms
And wish it was you
And not my knees in them
As with accidents
You never know
Good or bad
You never know