I passed beneath the bridge today
close by the place you once called home,
and I sensed your latent footprints
still lingering upon the stone.
I wonder . . . did you pass that way,
mysteriously, in the night,
as guardian angels carried you
across the galaxies t'ward light?
July 24, 2014
To all who may never know
Let me try to show
The deep and heavy cost
Of having tragic loss
Confusion and disbelief
Strikes hard before the grief
Many wounds cut deep
And pain denies you sleep
Gut wrenching turmoil deep inside
Shattering sorrow you cannot hide
Heart pounding blood into your head
Wishing now, you too were dead
Clutching at your belly
For the one you loved so dearly
Crumbling from the pain
You'll never be the same
When that fateful message comes
Burning like a thousand suns
And tears of dread, sting your face
Joy makes way, for sorrow, takes it's place
The tears will go one day
This is what they say
While every day you're trying
To keep yourself from crying
Those memories together were made
These memories they will not fade
And reopen the cuts of wounds so deep
These bloodied treasures that you keep
No potion can ever mend
No dressing can ever tend
As days and months have gone away
This festering rage is here to stay
Till the time is come again
That tragic day is like a stain
That time will never be gone
Where their spirit last shone
The moment it draws near
As you fight back the tear
This pain you cannot bear
For it has been one year
As you sit back and swallow the drink
And feel your life begin to sink
And darkness comes around
The room no longer makes a sound
You sit in place and stare
No more their love to share
You pray the silence take me
From visions I do not wish to see
Ten years on today
It's still not gone away
This deep and heavy cost
This truly tragic loss
I’m Physically and Emotionally tired
I don’t want to be the strong one anymore
I can’t this time
I don’t know what to do Daddy
I need your help down here
I can’t get back in control of my emotions
I’m having a hard time dealing with your absence
I’m having a hard time standing by myself
I need your help Daddy
I’m broken and lost without you Daddy
I need your will to want to carry on
I need your strength to over come this
I need your strength to stay standing
Your courage to fight back again
I need your help
Please Daddy I’m at a loss
How am I suppose to do this
I need your guidance
I need you to guide me back
To whom I was before
I need your help Daddy
I need your help
No matter that we've never met,
Compassion radiates from afar.
Rippling outward, gathering strength,
Expanding across the oceans wide.
A warm light like a rising sun,
Gently touches grieving hearts.
Distant strangers, I empathize.
Compassion has gracious eyes
For your sorrows and your tears.
With time, may it soften grieving pains.
Many times, I saw my spirit.
Many times, I felt my soul.
In life, I lived courageous.
Now it is time for me to journey home.
If you cry, that is fine.
If you laugh, that is better than a cry.
Rejoice in my life and shout praise.
For I am
Therefore, I shall be
In peace, I leave this world.
To my love ones, I am with the Lord.
Sure happy to have lived
Not sad that my time has come
The benevolence of the spiritual realm is a breeze from a waterfall.
The Lord is my keeper.
He called me home.
No more sadness let us all rejoice.
Ms. Carrie Mae Sexton is now reunited with Jehovah God Lord. A woman of statue...
A woman of worth... All that knew her will truly miss her.
Never a life lost but one done with the world and because she walked a virtuous path, her life is shown. The Lord knows best and we must know the same. Our mother sojourns and in peace, she lays.
[“Be assured that just as an hour is only part of a day so life on Earth is only part of eternity.” C.L. Allen]
User Name: Verlena
Psuedonym: Oblivion Dark Sunshine
Motif: Grief and Bereavement
-Contest Enter: Space & Time - Metaphorically written... Eternity is space and time... February 2014
Tears of Joy
God cried today; His tears fertilized
Mother Earth’s womb;
The fragrance of nature saturated the air.
Tomorrow I will cry upon your grave
Falling from pregnant memories:
Washing away grief’s gloom
And the happiness of peace we shared.
No more new toys for you
No more bread at breakfast
No more noisy shoes on Christmas
And no more having more
Did i kill dad?
Why then the corporal punishments?
Because dad lost the job
Dad lost the breath
Dad lost the plan
Dad lost you
Dad is no more
Why punish me not the job?
Dad got money from there
Can i go and get it?
Not now but one day you will
What about you?
I will go but i have to first make you know
That i am not Dad because he took off
Now he is sleeping
We have to spend less
Work a lot
Why don't you awake him?
He is dead!
What does that mean?
It means close your eyes
Sleep in a big box
People dig a whole hide you there
And you disappear forever
Wow that sounds fun mum can i join the game?
Its no game, its painful game of loss!
Mum, you cry when i climb trees
When dad wants to go with me you scream
But dad always makes cool choices
You don't understand son,
Your father has played the superman game
The monster broke his neck
And now he is lifeless like your toys
All the people that came here were on your Dad's funeral
Your father is dead
You are now an orphan, son!
Mum, dad is in the game
I know dad he will rise again
Kick the monster, break its neck and throw it in fire
Like what he used to about Jesus
And you will know he is not like my toys
I know son
Right now you cant understand but later you will
I know mum
Right now you cant understand but later you will
In memory of my late father who passed on in 1993 while i was a little boy
silence when i open the door
silence when i close it again
no one to make a noisy fuss
no one to welcome me in
no one barks at the mailman
no one brings the little ball
no one chomps the squeaky toy
but love still comes to memories call
I Folded My Mother Up
I folded my mother up
Into a creased peace of paper
Folding memories into intentions.
Flattening the dementia of unstructured emotions
Into a neat, file-able document.
We arc this abyss; tightening ropes over time.
We are not our worst intentions,
but we are the acts that follow.
Like clobbering footsteps tripping over
broken pavements of Being.
We are the not sum of our categories
or the crimes that we have witnessed
But we are the balance
That keeps us falling forwards without stumbling
Over our own shoelace sense of time.
written 22nd Oct 2013
Even after sixteen years
still I cry your daughters tears
Every year on this day, will always be sad
known only as the date, God took my dad
1st June 1954- 22nd Oct 1997
Allan Thomas Holmes
The air is full of mourning although the years have past,
My tears still flow like waves upon a rolling vast ocean;
I asked God to take my treasure in his trust for all time,
My sweet cat now slumbers in the silent dust.
Heavenly angels watch his still soft eternal repose,
I go there often and just sit, remember him and weep;
A moss draped stone upon the emerald green grass,
The only symbol of his existence on this earth.
He came to me a stray lost, starving and alone in the world,
Filled with utter fear and total distrust for all of mankind;
Ever so slowly a loving relationship and an eternal bond,
Death is the end of life but the love lives on.
I watched his slow breathing all that long, long night,
And when the sun rose high, he passed through the gate;
In Paradise, I imagine him waiting so quietly for me,
One day, I will hold him again to my heart.
November 1, 2013
Written by, Broken Wings
For the contest, Eternal Breath, Gail Angel Doyle
Featured poem June 29, 2014
I’m an alien in my own world
I think only I can see from above
I see the entire Earth
I see people, but no love
I try to tell them
They’re the aliens in this world…
This world was built to be loved
And yet all they do is hurt…
Look around…the world is round!
It is spinning for us!
Because there’s not many humans to be seen…
I know I’m not alone though
Humanity will never die…
That’s something that I know!
You created districts…
You ripped humanity into pieces
Now we’re fighting like we’re beasts
I mean…I’m from the Middle East…trust me I’ve seen…
I’ve seen the value of one’s life
Destroy a home for a dime
Destroy humanity and it doesn’t count as a crime…
and yet…I’m out of mind?
Am I the Assassin
or the Undertaker
He stopped coming our way again
He was no where in sight at school
Then, after a long absence
In the pit of the Chan Ah Tong padang
He came and stood at one corner of the field
He looked resigned grave
A stoic smile hovering over his lips
Over his virgin gossamer moustache
His voice a calm breeze
Of vowels constrained by crisp consonants
We saw less of his teeth
He was dressed in silk shirts
Well-ironed without creases
Trouser pleats showing strictness
Shoes shiny and sleek
The sheen of his hair obedient under cream
His gait measured strained
As though grim hands clawed at him
Through gaps in the ground
At first, we didn’t know
What to make of him
His new tutored appearance
And detached forbearing looks
He watched us play
Close on hours
Aloof far away
He never so much as waved
We turned to look
He was gone
Leaving the dusk to fall behind him
I called to see anyway at his place
His father frowned at me
Gruff undertones accompanied him inside
I saw a curtain ever so slightly tremble
After a while his mother
Came out to say
He had gone for good
I wasn’t sure what she meant
I stood there looking dazed
Then tears licked her cheeks
Her drained and stricken face
She went in dabbing her eyes
With the loose end of her sari
I never called on them again
I just couldn’t understand
The father’s anger and pain
At this world on which we stand
I was just a playing pal of his son’s
He was older than I was then
Yet he came just once
Out of who knows what inner command
Just to talk or stroll around
Now I am older and his elder
But is it I who laid him low
A date with fate
He came one morning to my place
All decked in his glad rags
Fingering a shiny white billiard ball
Twirling it between bony fingers
Like the natural leg-spinner he was
Just for fun he would let it lick the dust
And it swished near ninety-degree turns
I said: What about some quick nets
The day aged in labour and with forceps
He hesitated but on the spur
Said: Yes, why not
The rest of the morning I batted
Saw the wickets tumble uprooted
His spirits surged
Sweat sweet and sour
Sprinkled his shirt
And ran down his collar and spine
We laughed at every googly
Which missed the wickets by inches
We were back in olden Ali Baba times
Truants lost in a cave of our own
Diamonds refracted from his eyes
He said: We should do this more often
His heart must have caved in that very night
Or was it when he barely made it home
© T. Wignesan – Paris, February 3-4, 2013
TO A FORGOTTEN SUICIDE NOTE...
On the gallows o time my soul
Hung in despair.
Faith released its terrible swift sword;
Least my thoughts forgot.
Least my thoughts forgot the footprints
To be free of the mystified feelings locked
In catacombs of dreams
Stroking spiraling smoke to blurred visions
Gone stale like yesterday's day.
Time passes and grief remains dissatisfied.
Many a time I passed through trouble
Many a time I passed through pain
I was exploited
I was humiliated
My pride was taken from me
I was consumed by mystery
My wings were taken so I couldn’t fly
What I ate all day was my cry
I asked myself why
And there came a voice say
In your affliction will you learn right
In your oppression will you rise to fight
The sun shines at day
And the stars at night
Arise and see the light
Many a times I passed through trouble
Many a times I passed through pain
My brother you lived by the sand and the sea they both set your spirit free.
Remembering all the times that we went through doing things that brothers do.
As a chef you loved to cook and create watching Grandmon in the kitchen it was your fate.
Family and friends miss you so they all wish you did not go.
And Rocky my brother what can I say? I know I will miss you everyday.
written 23rd Oct 1997
So long I needed to visit
but my heart didn't listen
Letting you know how much "I love you so"
is now something, you will never ever know
Now that you are gone
I know I waited to long
If I could just have that one more chance
I would never treat it as just another glance
Now, you have become my biggest memory
for you have gone, to a place I can not see
Knowing that we will never again touch
makes me miss you, so very much
My children are still to young
to wonder why pop hasn't rung
My heart is now empty
for you, it always had plenty
I really do need to have you back
you were the "only one, who saw me back
I know deep down inside
you love me, more than words could describe
For it is only now, that I realise why you didn't want me around
you knew how "painful it would have been, to watch you drown
But, as long as I am still alive
you too, will continue to survive
For I will always be your darling little Denise
who hopes, you forever rest in peace
ALLAN THOMAS HOLMES
1st June 1954- 22nd Oct 1997
A graveyard stands upon the hill;
Its tombstones smoothed beneath the tide
Of nature's forces beating hard;
I pass and hear the buried cry.
"Reverse the trend, relentless grown,
That would erase our names for aye;
For who grants thought to silent stones
And corpses claimed in nameless graves?
We yet would speak, if you inquire,
If you draw near with ear and heart .
We speak of dreams left unfulfilled;
We sing our song which but in part
Was heard before our souls were claimed.
Oh, who will hear what we would tell
With our last link with life consumed,
When dust with dust is mingled well?
We have a vision unattained
By you who still are flesh and bone;
If you our secrets wish to shard,
Dare carve us deeper in the stone."
This poem was inspired by a very old cemetery behind my home.
The tombstones were worn so badly that the names could hardly
Rondelet: Who the hell cares
Who the hell cares
If it's the end of hostile world
Who the hell cares
See you soon - no sweat - just for scares
Upon some astre in maya* mould
Bye from this ball of molten gold
Who the hell cares
* maya: Sanskrit for "illusion; here "illusory"
(c) T. Wignesan - Paris, 2012
Reminisce of Southern streets honey suckle vines, Magnolia air
strolling my Pepe down old streets , flowers wild growing everywhere ~
What was in that carriage as I walked proudly down a sidewalk ?
My poodle Pepe, a blue bonnet tied, Pepe sat up faithfully, bonnet on his head .
spectators driving by with smiles , the girl with a baby poodle was the talk ~
On a old plantation porch calling Pepe ? Pepe come home ? I patiently await .
Where was my furry lamb with silk black curls ? My puppy needed his walk .
Told by my parents after several cries many weeks straight ~
~ For they knew of my Poodles Fate ~
"Come inside , Pepe will come back ." He would not come home , Winter cold.
Parents hearing tireless cries , the truth was reveled , In a shed Pepe died.
My Mother told me what no Parent wants to share with a child of five years old ~
My Poodle had been in a shed with my brother and Dad , curiosity he always had.
A ladder had fallen on him , taking him away . Calling for Pepe the same day ...
We buried my Pepe , wrapped in blanket with his bonnet, in the back yard.
~ A cross made of branches , brick inscribed " here lies Pepe " bouquet by side. ~
I can not explain this love that left my heart broken , tireless nights I cried.
In my cradle,
My tiny body was cradled
In my mothers arms.
My gem among gems,
I remember when I cried
You comforted me with
your soothing words.
Your re-assuring hands
Secured me till Death's
Cold hands snatched you
From me,a sucker I was
That needed you most.
Adieu! Sweet mum till
We cross paths again!
Ifeanyi Bob Ekechukwu
Cold gray stone that stands so right please watch over my love tonight.
For she was taken from my side on that cold November ride.
Early on the snow did fall quickly it covered all.
The wind howled with deep regret for the loss of my love my dearest Bernadette.
As the carriage started its slide I held her close and looked into her eyes.
Deep within her heart I could see all the love she held for me.
Alone now I stand through this life, alone with my tears my heart in strife.
Cold gray stone that stands so right please watch over my love tonight.
Contest: New Poets of Soup
ABANDONED SNEAKERS IN THE STREETS
As we walked watchfully along the way,
a pair of sneakers lay silently in the streets;
abandoned by flight or neglect. Their soles
have lost their occupant: gone to who knows where.
We cannot know the life they once shared;
for there are no footprints in the asphalt to trace
the path of their beginning nor the lonely journey's end;
neither is there a catalogue of exciting events experienced.
We will never know the lord and master
from whom they have been emancipated
to be left here only with the odor of memory:
an acquired anti-aromatic epitaph.
Swiftly strolling silently onward, we pondered
the sneakers’ seduced soul---rather than their sole.
One day this too, will be the fate of our shoes:
abandoned and left only with an acquired
anti-aromatic odor of memory.
One day I'll be gone
And it will be surreal at first
And you may question much
But you get to choose which is worse
You will remember all of our talks
I will help you recall
And our memories may cause you to tear
But I pray they never cause you to fall
One day I'll be in a different world
A new experience to discover
At the same time I'll be by your side
But we won't physically interact with one another
And I'll be sad to see you sad
So I hope you find only the joy
In the journey we shared together
Where I'd make you laugh and feel annoyed
One day you will question this world
And think that life is too short
But don't let the grief get to you my warrior
This is your battle to be fought
I am proud of your growth
You are doing so well but can't see
How much you have evolved as a person
And how strong and centered you can be
One day you'll look at stars
And wonder if I'm somewhere in between
But I'll be right there smiling upon you
But my smile will be unseen
Just know that I am with you
I'll play songs to help remind
And be open to trusting that it's me
In the little signs that you find
Have faith in the dreams that you have dear one
It is not your imagination
I'm simply trying to speak to you
Through my form of communication
One day we will be reunited
Only once your mission is complete
So laugh everyday and find reasons to smile
Until the next time we meet
THE PINK BLUSH
That pink chunk of flesh on me
Is not a blush you see
It is the rush of blood in veins
That has not been set free
Passing through the gaping window
Keeping well to my side
Sheltering under the blazing sun
From every corner of circles around
When tangled threads of desires surround
I bother myself
And whisper aloud
Am I a sentence that must end at a full stop?
Or a blessing that shall be used as a prop?
What if someday I am lost?
What if today I drown?
What if I shed the pink blush?
Will these make him frown?
I pity not him
But the animal within
He lets him not see
My longing for love
He lets him not hear
My craving for care
How then will he
Come to my rescue?
For his rotten soul is already dead
For his mind is not well fed
But when did I earn it?
Or how did I earn?
When did I let my desires burn?
He was the one
The sacred of all
Why did he then
Let us fall?
He did say not once
But a million times
His heart ached too
He suffered from inside
And I failed to hear
His musical chimes
I failed to hear the
stories of all times...
Orchestrated plots from the birth of corruption
Meticulously cunning, blue print semantics
Shadows overriding sheer manipulation
Much more to its sleeves, sly gimmickry and antics
Overlapping smokescreen piling up to its feet
Diversionary tactics, garden variety
Principles dropped, conceded an utter defeat
Distraction thirsts for blood, hounds for the killing spree
When darkness overcomes the illumination
Claiming a population, an epidemic
By the hundreds on process of elimination
Resistance is futile to such obvious logic
Retaliatory, uprising insurgence
The masses’ response with strings attached
Casted under a spell, hypnotic indolence
A fearsome adversary, no other can match
Time’s in fast changing pace, turning the wheels of fate
Right up into the very heart of society
An impending apocalypse spearheading straight
The core that dictates man’s unending enmity
WHEN MY TEARS DOESN'T COUNT
A lot question asked, where art thou been
that your lines are but not seen
is all but dire and my light grows deem
whence commeth o lord my dream
can i ever for a day before i die a winner?
o God i'm i the only zionc sinner
can't you give me a hope even though glimmer
even my bone say to my flesh thou art slimmer
does the heaven see my flowing tears?
is it until my eyes close to death-fear
horror in my vain andpain in my ears
o heaven can you kill me soft alike the pears?
i speak of the heavens what of man that don't care
alot saw my tears but never dare
all but wind they strive leaving a brother bare
let earth and heaven hear even though count not my tears
You will find me again
In the place you’ve never been
Once everything’s said and done
In the heart of the autumn sun
When the weather drips its hues
Faint, fading colors
the leaves will lose
Drop to the earth
with a hint of white
Falling under trees
In the days’ waning light
Waves of Gold grown old
All your secrets and troubles untold
You shall call and I will hide
Forever will I be by your side
I promised I wouldn't write any more sad poems this week
I promised myself I'd enjoy the warm weather with every beat
I promised I'd dwell on the light no matter how flickering it lit
Sad news keep pouring, I never promised me of none of it
Am afraid to move, afraid to hear, afraid to know, if only the world would stand still
Gone and flushed out my life not through the simplicity of adoption,
But through another type of passing, this was my only option,
With no financial stability I lost all capability,
To care for you, they stripped you from me through my own admissibility,
How could you know I was your mother, I never even gave you a name,
I stripped my precious "No Name" of life and put myself to shame,
No face do I have, don't look, just turn away,
I feel judged as my face perceived my thoughts in a disarray,
I hear them all talking, screaming, "Murderer, killer!"
I can't bare this type of torture they yell, "Kill her, kill her!"
The voices in my head force my hand a little more by the day,
I took the life of my own and now my heart is starting to decay,
But deep down within you try to find some inner peace,
Oh but how that can never be see how your peace became so brief,
But don't think the simple feeling of stitches will give you healing,
With a sudden sigh of relief you could never compress this feeling,
All the shame and the pain and the hurt and the lies,
Sitting there all night in the mirror while you cry,
You do the crime you pay the time is usually the story's moral,
But I got out with an easy pass, oh how my thoughts begin to quarrel,
Sickness taking hold of me, but this is different from before,
Because this sickness isn't caused from the beautiful soul I once bore,
Once more, I live a life that feels like a living hell,
Can't you tell by my outward expression all the inner pain I dwell,
Of course I have times when I sit up all night and cry,
Maybe it's because I feel a part of me within has died,
Even though the sad reality is that a part of me was killed,
So maybe I shed tears at the thought that my own blood was spilled,
Cold chill going through the inner course of my vein,
Slowly but surely it enters the course of my brain,
FREEZE! And it coerces me to deliberate,
Stuck between tears and silence I now am left here to hesitate,
I made my decision before I even knew I cared,
Paranoid, my thoughts are overruled and now they've got me ensnared,
Not ready to be responsible I had no clue what to do,
So with remorse I sent you to your demise before I knew you.