About thanksgiving a bunch of turkeys get together,
Have a meeting about sales for the holidays.
About fall they send out that letter.
Well those business folks got to cuss and discuss,
And figure how to gear it,
To make us customers
Feel that holiday spirit!
Here’s the minutes of the meeting,
We’ll skip the high fives greeting.
“All through the mall we’ll have ho- ho- ing Santys
From the computer games to the racks of panties.
Adult book stores will send out Yule tide flyers,
To attract all the spirit filled porno buyers.
Don’t forget to put some plastic wreaths
Round those expensive briefs,
And the music; what about the music?!
Let’s start the secular Christmas songs,
In time for the black Friday throngs.
Make sure the songs don’t mention God or Jesus,
We don’t want to offend and have people leave us,
Remember Christmas is all about the money,
So let’s spread the ads on thick like honey!
Hide all the advertised sales on goods for this time of year..
And put the top dollar toys and items by the cashier..
So if you business people got more ideas, let’s push them through!
What’s that? Oh yeah…ah…merry Christmas to you too.
MEETING ADJOURNED !”
“(hey Bill, ..about that bikini clad Santa dancing on the new hutch,
I think maybe her pine needle bra is a bit much…..?
What you think?….)”
Inspired by Carolyn D. (too long for the contest, but had fun with it!)
On the 12th day of kiss-mass my true love sent to me
12 dirty undies
11 socks a stinking
10 shoes a humming
9 shirts for pressing
7 days of take-out boxes
6 flagons of beer
5 D V D's
4 mischievous children
3 dozen wine bottles
2 ex partners
and an engagement ring under the tree
There is no greater pleasure than the mixture of fall and winter
We start with Halloween
The pumpkins, the sweets, the treats
Black and orange set the tone
The chill is just starting to hit your spine
You can smell it in the air
Feeling on edge
Waiting for the scare
BAM! It comes, it goes
The temperature drops
The turkeys better run
You better buy your elastic pants
And make room in your house for the whole family
The fire, the gathering, the attire
The smell of pumpkin floods your nostrils
You gain an internal warmth
Let us say a prayer for this meal
Look outside, winter is now here
The transition from fall has been made
Pull out the scarves and hats
And set out your Christmas mats
The fat man is coming to town
Put away your frown
This is a jolly season
Decorate the houses, prepare the tree, sip your cocoa
Mistletoe is in the air
And the sound of wrapping paper is in your ear
We're getting close
You better turn in your list or you're toast
Sleep early, listen for the jingle bells
Christmas morning, looks like Santa stopped by
Welcome to winter
Say goodbye to Finter
I do not know?
The northern skies are turning gray --
Seems the sun just doesn’t linger.
Christmas is just a month away,
And the nights are getting longer.
That Thanksgiving spent with family—
A briefly pleasant holiday—
Was forgotten all too quickly
By pushy crowds on Black Friday.
Our gift checklist seems like old Saint Nick’s,
But our staff is lacking Elves.
Shopping trips cause daily panics.
I wonder how we’ll feed ourselves.
We must buy more decorations,
So the yard looks like it’s snowing.
We fall deeper in depressions
As our credit keeps on growing.
Lord forgive commercialism
For ruining every Christmas.
Lord forgive consumerism
For dumping on us all that stress.
December is a dreary time,
Even when little angels sing.
The irony of Christmas time
Was that Christ was born in the Spring.
While standing in the checkout line,
Remember what the carols told.
Think of how Bethlehem’s star once shined,
As Israel’s prophets foretold.
Think of the awe of the shepherds
When they saw angels fill the air.
Coming to the stable, entered,
To meet the Holy Family there.
Instead of spending all you have,
Next November and December,
Spend time with all of those you love,
And teach them what to remember.
"A Savior born in Bethlehem"
Should bring us joy and happiness;
And “ Peace on Earth, goodwill to men”
Should set us free, not bring us stress.
THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS
When Thanksgiving Day is finally gone
And Autumn's days are rushing on
We come to a time when feelings change
Even the animals begin to act strange
It's a time that's filled with anticipation
And the joy of a soon to come celebration
A time when hearts are festive and light
With beautiful Christmas trees shining so bright
A time to remember the birth of a child
Born in a stable, so meek and mild
Whose birth was foretold by angels in dreams
And becomes more wonderful each year, so it seems
So if we all took the time to recall the reason
Why the entire world celebrates this season
The a true Christmas Spirit would surely prevail
And the world would be more than willing to tell
Of the Christ Child born on this day back then
To become a Man who can save us from sin
A Man with the gift of Eternal Life
To be lived with Him and be free of strife
So let the Spirit of Christmas touch you today
And spread it to others along your way
Then maybe this year the whole world will see
The real Spirit of Christmas in you and in me
By Dane Smith-Johnsen
It was the Day after Thanksgiving and every store in town.
Had planned to opened wide its doors before daylight could be found.
It was an outlandish sight to see people sleep overnight.
Shoppers camping on sidewalks people waiting in the moonlight.
The Christmas shopping season was formally set in motion!
Hustling, bustling, getting, and grabbing: bikes, pipes, and lotion.
TVs, wreaths, computers, briefs, trees, ties, anything money buys.
Some starry-eyed children sway singing with Santa beneath skies.
Meanwhile, Jesus Christ, the nativity, and live manger scenes
Attempt to teach people what the Christmas season really means.
A few carolers come singing along their neighborhood streets.
And the folks that they sing too, with big smiles, surprise them with treats.
A God loving soul amid the clamorous celebrations,
Gathers his family, to make costumes and preparations.
Mary, Joseph, Jesus, shepherds, and the three Kings with gifts, myrrh.
Reverently, they reenact our blessed Savior's Holy birth.
This poem was written for Carolyn Devonshire's Christmas in Your Town contest.
Poetic form: A narrative written in couplets.
I do not know?
It’s Valentines Day full of cards and kisses
Wish you were here covers all of my wishes
Easter is here and were celebrating our lord
Each day that passes I miss you even more
It’s been seven years today since we said, “I do”
It seems longer than that since I last held you
We all gather together for the birth of our land
It’s the Fourth of July and your not here as we planned
It’s your birthday today marking 34 years
When I think of you celebrating alone, it brings me to tears
Now it’s thanksgiving and the families all here
The rooms filled with spirit and still your not here
Out of habit I set a place at the tables head
The kids leave it and “Soon Mom” is all that was said
Santa is coming and kids are full of cheer
I try to keep smiling even though you are not here
Pictures with Santa and the lighting of the tree
Smiles on Christmas morning I wish you could see
We gather to wish good tidings to all
I sit and wait by the phone thinking maybe you’d call
You have missed a great deal in the year you’ve been gone
Jason had a great time at his junior prom
Katie turned seven and Chrissie turned two
For all their birthday wishes- they just wished for you
At night we all get tucked into bed
We snuggle up close and then bow our heads
Dear Lord please keep special watch over our Dad
If anything happens to him we’ll be so sad
He’s over helping the other country grow
Doing his job as you already know
He’s helping other little boys and girls
Opening their eyes to a whole new world
We are so proud of him and hold our heads high
But each night we hear mommy lay there and cry
We all miss him more than you know
Yet during the day we don’t let it show
We have to be strong and keep the faith
That soon he’ll be home with us and be safe
We are proud to hang that flag up high
We are all so full of American pride
We pray for all the soldiers’ safe return home
We pray that there are no more families left alone
Dear God for this Christmas please hear us pray
Bring our soldiers home where they belong, where they’ll stay
Ho. Ho. Ho. Here we go,
blow off the calendar
Racy red, glazy green
and bright white
blaze into sight.
Hell's bells, boredom tells.
Yuletide pride takes a ride,
while leaves on trees
as yet yearn to turn
and Turkey Lurkey is still
wheezing in the freezer.
Save your sales
for a later date;
in return, you may earn
than you've ever seen.