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Ballad Confusion Poems | Ballad Poems About Confusion

These Ballad Confusion poems are examples of Ballad poems about Confusion. These are the best examples of Ballad Confusion poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Ballad | |

Bobby

 This one is totally fictional.

Don't cry little guy just 'cause you're moving away
Your daddy's got a brand new job out in Santa Fe
He's trying to make a better life for your mom and you
So, how about holding back those tears
Yes, I'm crying too
So I said goodbye to Bobby like I knew I had to do
But Some things that I told him
Weren't exactly true
I wish I could have told him to stay
If that's where he'd really like to be
I wish I could have told him the truth
About his mom and me
So, I said goodbye
And tried not to cry
And told him to have fun
I wish I could have said to him
Bobby, you're my only son.


Details | Ballad | |

Empathie

Etranges sentiments qui remplissent mon coeur
Confuses sensations, le mensonge est roi
D'obscures vibrations pénètrent en moi
Comme si tout me ment, amplifiant ma douleur

Ce que je ressens n'est à moi nullement
Emotions lointaines que capte mon esprit
Tristesse soudaine dont je suis fort surpris
Douloureux et blessant je subis ce tourment

Cette empathie forte me brûle m'enflamme
Livrant les parts d'ombre, sans un mot prononcé
Un univers sombre traverse mes pensées
En m'ouvrant  la porte, du livre des âmes


Details | Ballad | |

He was only 17

He crushed his heart. On hopes flutteringly light as butterfly wings. On dreams foolishly bright as silver bells. On dreams seemingly fine and looking good. He broke his heart. On tales of lust hewn from his faint heart. He banked his faith on the words of a woman. He lost his sight searching into darkness. He thought it wise to love once and never again. He thought he had found his only love. His only hope. He was only 17


Details | Ballad | |

Is It Worth It

Love can seem so happy and so wonderful
But it can hurt and take away from life too
You make me so happy and make me feel so special
But then you turn around and make me feel like ****
love can turn you into a whole new person
But you could change into to something great or something no one wants
Love seems so wonderful at first 
But spending my days not knowing if you want me or even care for me is agonizing 
Sometimes i feel like your lying to me but if i say that then you'll get mad again
Your such a loose cannon, ready to burst with rage and tears
Love is so temperamental 
so can you tell me....... 
Is It Worth It?


Details | Ballad | |

A House On the Cliff's Edge

There is a house on the cliff’s edge,
Around a quiet, unmarked shoreline
At night, the tide lifts high against a foggy moon
In the morning, gloomy clouds settle with the sea
At times, not even the birds are seen or heard
The house is left to nature’s caress

Home-crafted seashell chimes sway and sing with the wind
Crushed sand dollars lie together on the back porch
The shells were once whole, collected by the former owners
Long gone are they now, smiling with the moon
The owners are the very sound of the ocean spray,
Striking the rocks, announcing the cool dawn of day
They are not the dark, empty rooms,
The rooms that nobody thinks of as they go about their lives
The quiet owners are long gone—thought of only by one
A stillborn legacy about as tiresome as the sun,
When the clouds crisp out its beams . . .

A seawater puddle is in the middle of the dining room
Nobody knows it sits there, sinking in the floorboards
It used to be a far larger puddle after a storm,
Stealthily leaking into the house
But now it is small—so small—and the boards are moist,
Moist with its only companion amongst the instilled silence

Nobody thinks of empty, abandoned rooms
Nobody remembers the former owners
They were not much for socials and gatherings
They always lived their quiet, happy lives
Without a care of the outside world,
Far from anybody’s thought
Miles from the nearest home
Where the next generation comfortably lives 

He never finished fixing that leak . . .

Sometimes the puddle gets bigger after other storms
And when it does, there is almost life there again
You can see the chandelier reflected on the unperturbed water
As a crystal dangles and falls from on high
The dark silence following the drop is as deep as thought . . .

Nobody thinks of empty, abandoned rooms
Nobody remembers the former owners
There is merely a house on the cliff’s edge
Around a quiet, unmarked shoreline

-March 21, 2013-


Details | Ballad | |

The Power Of Pride

As I surmise all that is me strewn and cluttered, 
My conscious lies casually shorn and shuttered, 
For here lie the spoils of stubborn iniquity, 
I shuffle and toil, floundering in frailty. 

Oh what great havoc, what conscious so lewd, 
Creates such traffic which now spoils the fruit, 
Of truly righteous deeds committed by a scurrilous man, 
Of whom I could no better know, no better understand, 

For this terribly lost and forever forlorn soul, 
Is none other than me shivering and sniveling so, 
And as helpless as I suddenly appear to be, 
I now understand the strength pride provides so easily, 

For there is purpose in pride, yet none in shame, 
As ambition carries us blind to who’s at blame, 
And just where is the woe when the devil may care, 
For we are soon found alone, our conscious left bare, 

And as I embark into this desolate place, 
My horrors so dark, my fears crimson in taste, 
Forward I race into the perilous pit, 
With none other to blame for this simple life I quit.


Details | Ballad | |

Windows Apart

She slips away silently, to escape mothers screams
And crawls so softly, into bed, into dreams

His dreams became so dark
Left them to his escape into the dark
To dream open eyes outside window 
Across his vision he saw as light lost its flicker 

Loss for air she lay, sobbing away sorrow
But she felt invaded, grasping in surprise's horror
So close these shattered mirrors lay
A soft curious cry,a leaf blow away
Together now their halos became so clear
The coping of bewildered souls to share

He slips away silently, to escape his skeleton's haunts
And crawls softly, into new arms, to cure a world of wants


Details | Ballad | |

Across the Way - The Sequel

Another day and the dishes have piled up yet again
So back I end up in front of the window 
I do not glance up, but concentrate
On the dull, dirtied objects before me
I do not hear the voices from yesterday
I still wallow in the grime of gray
I smile in malcontent
As I lather the dishes with soap
Against my will, I look up 
To see a lone, fat man opening a refrigerator
He is shirtless, bulgy, and he looks pregnant
My first supposition is to laugh
But I only look back down at the dishes
Not wanting to stare at the fat man
Not wanting to think he looks pregnant
For sure not wanting him to be my neighbor
Across the way

Against my will again, I look up
The fat, pregnant man is gone
I see ornaments on the refrigerator
Some pictures, some magnets
Family; not so different from my life
But yet, there is a transparent fancy of mystery
A flashy rage of difference in the silence
Oh, so quiet
The blazing sun sprays its light upon the hour
Not only are my hands wet from the soapy water
The deafening tone of quietude
Revels in me a mixture of loneliness and physical heat
A burning desire for something not seen
A desire for utter disgust of my newly found neighbors
But I find myself not disgusted at all
Until I look up again and see a fully naked man at the window
Across the way


Details | Ballad | |

Dawson

No pagan crown of fossil lairs
Of him I write no verse nor song
T’is not a soup to stir nor share
When lending strength, to something wrong.

Seconds cloned from darkest matter
Mutated minutes dredged by fear
Mind confusion as reason shatters
Innocents lanced by emotion's spears.

Flowers edge the steps and fences
Prayers are uttered near a shrine
Notes of love, as grief commences 
A vigil wrought by hearts sublime.

Picking up the scattered pieces
Light must shine to crack the dawn
Support can smooth the furrowed creases
Only hope can make their spirits strong.


Details | Ballad | |

life in america

 HAD HER REALLY FEELING LIKE THAT SHE COULDN'T GO TO SCHOOL   
in            her heart i n her body she froze  mevmerize by the  time that she had to 
into her body man that dude


Details | Ballad | |

Martyr for the Unorthodox word

If I had over 10,000 dreams You'd be the only thing my mind could see Judgment couldn't be real Succumbing to the fear of this cold life Find a way to break through The self-destruction of wordly delusions Don't tell me I've lived so long in a lovely illusion Break me down until we find a Nirvanic state Then bring me a savior from transgressions An atoning sacrifice Send down to me a messenger for me to submit to Bring me the truth to break through The delusion Bring me the messenger to explain it all And let me leave behind Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word


Details | Ballad | |

Cupid Doesn't Care

Remembering that Valentine’s
Is just an off kilter lie
And love is cruel and hateful
A salted drink splashed in your eye

Perhaps you will live your life
For no one else’s fame 
Clutching for no other’s gaze
Far ways from the game

But no, you want to fall in love
Just like all the rest
Through warning friends will say to you
Alone is for the best

Gods look down and laugh at us
Like a sitcom, only real
And so they grin and snicker
And let their laugher out in peels

Hope is all we try to keep
When love just isn’t fair
There’s just no help for us you see
‘Cause Cupid doesn’t care 


Details | Ballad | |

Best Friend

The one who was always there for me, my very best of friends.
Was walking right beside me, when she decided it should end.
I thought of how she ended it all, on that very day.
I figured out how to get her back, in my own special way.
I went to her house, to prepare for my plans.
I was willing to do, whatever I can.
When I got there, I was greeted by her cat.
She would soon not care for it, that’s a fact.
After I finished, I walked into her home.
There was her mother, sitting all alone.
My friend had no father, sister, or brother.
Just the cat, and an old helpless mother.
I could tell she was home, because of her scream.
My friend had found her cat, it seemed.
After that, she moved inside.
Inside the closet, I tried to hide.
As she opened the door, all I heard were her cries.
But soon she’d be in, for another surprise.
I cracked the door, so I could see the hall.
She slammed her fists, into the wall.
And then she saw, her mother’s head.
Sitting there body less, she knew she was dead.
I guessed it was time, to admit to my sins.
I opened the closed, and came out from within.
She saw me coming, and asked me. “Why?”
“Why did my mother, have to die?”
Our friendship was dying, it wouldn’t take long.
I wanted to save us, is that so wrong?
And that’s when, she pulled a gun on me.
I fell to the ground, as the bullet ripped through my skin.
And at my side as I lay dying, my very best of friends.


Details | Ballad | |

Bruise Me

You always try
to break me down
you always try to knock me out
damage me with just your words
not physical but it still hurts
and all you do is make it worse.

You bruise me
Cut me with your tounge
Brutalize me, cut and binding
as my blood pours from the scars.
You bruise me
and it's really nothing more.

Berate me
go on hate me
it's something you love to do
yell at me, because now i see
there's nothing left for me with
you.
Your eyes so cold, words are old
nothing else that you can say
times running out, it's over now
and your the one who bruised
it away.

You bruised me
Cut me with your silver tounge
Brutalize me, cut and binding
As my blood pours from the scars
You bruised me
And really nothing more.


Details | Ballad | |

Echo...

"...you have one duck... I saw it."
"no crickets, but yes, the sound"

~I have some fish, swimming around...

Who are you? And where do you be?
As I walk this forest, how do you, see me?
A cricket's sound, some fish around,
But you and you lost to my sea.
Why, do you two follow me?

An open door, extended before,
A hand, a smile, I waited awhile, with
hopes and maybe some fantasy.
I hoped you woulda, woulda hit on me.
But in retro, I did so see...

My time of past, dyes deep and fast,
a flow, a hum, my life was numb.
In a time of change, I rearranged,
the elements of my being.
I changed, to my Me Becoming.
And I stopped in my tracks,
while in my running.

Hanging there was Venus dear,
A photo I gave you, from above.
The Sun ablaze, the Moon amazed,
while I heard your Heart. My love...

But questioned I when you raised an I,
and you didn't reply to my song?
I sang again! And I glared at you then,
but you turned, as though I were wrong?
A butterfly, a kiss by your eye... and yet,
I still wonder why your park is gone.
And the Indian Sang, but you heard no song?

~Know. The journey is Long...


Details | Ballad | |

I'm Only Loving You Once

Because I'm only loving you once
I want to make it perfectly clear
No one can take that away from me
And it's a life of fear

I'm only loving you once
Forever in this life of pain
Death would solve this problem
For there is nothing left to gain

I'm only loving you once
Too bad you can't love me
If you could only love me once
We'd love through all eternity


Details | Ballad | |

I'm Sorry

 im sorry ive caused you pain.
i thank you for sticking by me through everything.
and not giving up on me. i dnt no what
i would do if you had given up on me.
 
Im sorry ive lied to your face and you knew it,
but you still loved me the same as before.
so i thank you.
i dont know if i would be here with you if you had given up on me.
 
im sorry ive broken your trust over and over,
and you still wanna trust me.
i thank you again.
i dont know wat i would have done if you didnt trust me.
 
im sorry ive done things behind your back,
even though i promised you i would never do them.
im sure you knw but you never said anything.
i wish you would have. it would have saved us all alot of pain
 
i thank you for never giving up on me.
i dont no how to tell you how much i love you.
 
mom i love you sooooooo much you wont ever no how much i love u and thank you for everything


Details | Ballad | |

A Poetry Ballad

Ballad of the poet

When the moon kissed the sun, and light spread upon the earth. *hh*
Bright and early, 
early bird gets the worm.

With sullen time on stand by.... *DJ*"
Spurns emerald valleys that blur upon my new-found perch  *J.M.G*
While all nature wakes from slumber in timeless glory. *E.G*
Morning glory stroked by a ceremonious dandelion... whisper~   *K.D*

Bitter like morning breath.
Rooster crows, two songs, I share a note with him.
My cat rises to the sun of a new day.
Stretches into a c with her tongue curled and tail furled  *S.K.*
My coffee offers the sweetest taste after a goodbye kiss.
Clever and warm, I twinkle to the new morning light,
as I step outside, something pierced my heart..
~Wing broken, his bow in tow, arrows strewn, 
~No flight for thee, love lost, bent arrows I see,"  *R.M*
Everything I see, everything I feel around me.
Becomes a new song.
Born of many emotions.
I roll them on a paper without a pen. 
BUT!  In my mind they speak clearly to me~
Look into My eyes with your heart... and there you will find your soul  * R.A.D.*

"I hear an angel calling The beastly being within"   *R.S*
A new creation awaits beyond the path of dreams content,
Eros and Cupid both shoot through my heart."  *J.H.*
As the arrow's liquid enters my soul...    *RON*
Will that winged creature with the bow and arrows stop blinking his eyes?" *R.P*
He has stretched his wings too far this time.  *V.B.*
"His arrow of love is strumming my heart with golden grace.  *L.M*
A Halo'd smile upon my face.    * L.H*
Has suddenly turned to a grimace!   *G.S.*


(( feel free to add a line** in my comment box... ))


Details | Ballad | |

LET US ALL SAVE PEACE

I woke watching television news
The jet plane is soaring high note
Operation Sulu is launched forth
Until the intruders to get out
Malaysia always chose to peace
Come and let us all save peace

Philippines is wanting peace
For Sulu Archipelago is its part to ease
Sulu Royal Army chose to enter because of peace
They call homeland in the book pages 
They decide to stay and die never ended
Many see this is not a good choice
But for them this is a pride to hold and take
Come and let us all save peace

For Malaysia also has to protect its state
Its sovereignty whether lives at stake
It has chosen the space to negotiate
And has given the time to withdraw in peace 
But the “intruders” is hard to take the leave
Come and let us all save peace

Many children cried
Much wives shed tears
Every Mothers weep
Their love ones died but with pride
Our prayers to put ahead their faith
Come and let us all save peace

The eyes of the world where are you?
The humanitarian aid you have to do
Don’t you see the lives are here waiting?
The civilians need your helping
Do not wait until the time lapse to nothing
Come and let us all save peace and do something.

Come and let us all save peace
Take part and let us all save peace
Pray and let us all save peace
Where are you peace activists?
Come and let us all save peace
Let us all save peace!




This is the day that Malaysian Forces conducted “Ops Sulu” to drive the group from Sulu that recently entered Tandu’, Lahad Datu, Sabah. 12:41PM, 5th March 2013, Bandar Sandakan, Sabah, Malaysia. 

Please Print and Distribute to Save Peace. Thank you
Get the copy here: http://www.academia.edu/2904281/LET_US_ALL_SAVE_PEACE


Details | Ballad | |

STOP THE WAR

Today I am crying
I am crying that my brothers are fighting
The fighting started from historical claim
The claim that never any sides to give in
Today my tears fell to my bosom
I am anxious to what happen

Why never the peace is reign?
Why war shall be the end?
Why the people love to kill?
Why there is no way to end without blood spill?

I am not superman to stop the falling tears
I wanted to embrace my brothers to say please stop!
Please stop the war that spills blood.
I wanted to cry out loud but my sober is louder

Please end the war 
Stop and give ending
There would be no winner fighting between brothers
The only winner in war is “loser” for fighting with brothers
Please...
Please...
Please...
There must be other ways - to the end the bloodshed!
Please 
Please 
Please
Please stop it, stop the war!!!
Stop the war!
Stop the fighting!
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Stoppppppppppppppppppp the War!!!!!
Where are you UNNNNNNNNN?





Sunday, 3rd March 2013
Sunthecan

A poem for the current skirmish in Lahad Datu and Semporna
Sabah, Malaysia. Let us all pray for PEACE! 



Details | Ballad | |

The Song of the Loner

Cut out from the rest, feeling so left out I lay my head on my hands and sigh: Why did things have to happen this way Why is it that I was denied? Denied the basic friendship, A meager ounce of which could help, To grow in thought, deed, word and spirit, To help strengthen myself. Why is it that I feel the need, To sit in the corner and cry? The cold creeps in and I’m overcome By the darkness and void of the night. I lift my head and open my eyes, The tears they blur my sight, And through hazed vision I notice a single star, A lone beacon in the sky. The clouds they part and a million other stars Come out from hidden slumber; They join with that single star to make The glow in the night sky brighter. Combined with the light of the great white moon, They light up the earth below. Their twinkle and their glimmer reflects on the pool, Of tears lying on the floor. Suddenly the truth hits me: My life was playing right before me! I realize that soon the time would come When I would not be lonely. That there would come a day when I wouldn’t have to weep In self pity and dismay; That the clouds of hate and bitterness Would one day roll away. That the love and friendship I duly deserve Would fall like summer rain Refreshing my soul and replenishing my spirit Making me whole again. Yet till that day I have to wait And learn to shine on my own. So for now I stand up and wipe away my tears; My spirit no longer forlorn.


Details | Ballad | |

The Forgotten Ones

Forgotten somewhere in the midst of steel and concrete. 
Bound by shackles and chains even in our sleep. 
Living like wolves preying amongst lost sheep. 
Concrete tears and pains so mindfully deep. 

Forgotten by those on the outside. 
We cant even run no where, we cant even hide. 
No choice left but to sit and fight. 
In here only the strong minded survive. 
Truth be told in here what is wrong is right. 

All most os us got is wasted M&^*&F*^&&ng time. 
We sit back and work out and write heartfelt rhymes. 
Not to be a victim of prey we all trying. 
Many stories are told, songs are written of truth over lying. 

We are gone for the moment but not truly forgotten so the hurt we must not show it.
 We are to old while we young to be crying in front of full grown men for this is a time we must out grow it.
 There aint no way out this hell hole and we all know it. 
Feelings of hopelessness surrounds te heart to the point where we can no longer control it.
 
In here there is only time no fun. 
Darkness fills night no light shone in here from the sun. 
Only by our own selves we may be out done. 
BECAUSE IN HERE IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE TRULY THE FORGOTTEN ONES....


Details | Ballad | |

With This New Day

I have lived, 
And felt the cost, 
Paid my dues, 
But I have lost_ You. 


 Still I pray, 
As chaos looms, 
And as my blue turns into grey, 
I hear__ 
The angels sing- In tune. 

 Don't be giving in, 
Don't give up my son, 
Or fade away, 
Lift your chin with the sun__ And rise, 
With this new day!. 

 I have lived, 
And felt the cost of all my wonderin ways, 
I've paid my dues, 
I - Have lost you. 


 I can hear the angels sing, 
Your in a mistaken land__ Lessons learned in truth, 
As the grey seeks out the blue, 
She will__ Your daughter my son--- 
She will return--- To You.

For I have lived, 
Felt the cost of all my walkin days, 
I've paid my dues, 
I- Lost you....


I wont be giving in, 
Won't give up my girl, 
Or fade away, 
I'll lift my chin with the sun--- 
And RISE-- 
With this new day...


Details | Ballad | |

Confusion

I am completely confused, beyond my words,
I am interested in this girl that changes my world,
Change is something I fear but today all is unfurled,
But what do I do when I choose to change the world?

Relationships for me have never been so easy in past,
More than half of my relationships never seem to last,
I work too hard and try too hard to pass,
Then I fall as if forever, right on my ass.

Seeing her in class, she seems not mizzy,
Yet all the time I try, she comes off as busy,
All this confusion is making me feel so dizzy,
So what do I do to change this rampant tizzy.

That is enough, with this confusion I am done,
All these questions are weighing me down by a ton,
Pass me my book before the night has victoriously won,
I'd rather move on from this confusion and just start having fun.


Details | Ballad | |

John Henry

John Henry

He wakes up in the morning 
when the clock shows five
And he looks in his mirror 
and sees he's still alive
He stumbles in his room 
and falls down in his chair
And he listens to voices 
BUT THERE'S NOBODY THERE

He was born in the summer of 94
And was found on the steps
Outside the church door
And from that day on
He would live the life of the poor
He never knew his momma
And he never knew his pa
To find them now he would need radar

At the age of sixteen he left his life in care
He had so many parents some were good
And some were poor
And others just showed him the door
Now he is back to his usual tricks
And he is looking for more kicks
So he decides  to have one more score
And he slips down from his chair

And now he is lying on the floor
Poor John Henry
The boy who lived next door


Details | Ballad | |

TRIPPIN' OUT

 Here I sit
 Watching time go by.
 I'm all alone,
 But high.

 I think I'm "Trippin' Out", without a doubt.

 Everything seems to be spinning.
 I see two frogs playing poker.
 And neither one's winning.

 I'm "Trippin' Out", without a doubt.

 The phone rang,
 I answered my shoe.
 I couldn't remember
 What to do.

 I'm "Trippin' Out", without a doubt.

 I heard the doorbell,
 And wondered if he or she
 Would be able to tell.


 That I'm "Trippin' Out", without a doubt.

 So, I didn't answer the door
 And decided to get stoned some more.
 So I lit another joint,
 And to get right to the point.

 I was "Trippin' Out", without a doubt.

 My eyelids sank,.
 And my mind grew blank
 As the world moved farther away.
 I woke up the next day
 With these words to say,

 I was "Trippin' Out", without a doubt. 

(per contest rules - Influence was Marijuana)


Details | Ballad | |

Antigone

I am the face of misery
My life, a dissonance of autumn and spring,
The years are written in the same
Lugubrious, nostalgic grey
How can it be the author to blame?
I cannot scream this all away…
Burn nor Bleed this all away…
To Death I am Ordained

Lacuna ever growing
With Velvet sheets of life flowing
Aeons apart of my "royalty"
Under the mask the cannot see...
Can you dispel this tragedy:
Antigone - Epiphany failing

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

No words of hope
No words of hate
Do I have Lenore to send to me:
The sordid child of Thebes
Caught In the longest nightmare
life - the slowest way to die

I know this is my life 
But I'm not under control
under the mask the will see
Just Another Human

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

Can you dispel my life; this tragedy?
Can you control the storm in my mind?
I'm asking you: can you rid me
Of The Curse of Antigone?


Details | Ballad | |

I'm Still Here

I'm still here,
Though I think that I,
May be fading fast,
You know you've never known me,
And I cry,
When I see that I've a past.
Somehow I know,
That if I could go,
And redeem myself,
I'd sleep in my own head at last.

When did this girl appear?
In the mirror,
wracked with fear,
When will this reflection be
Someone who looks like me?

It's cold outside,
But I love the ice,
Because it warms my soul
And takes me to my childhood.
Throwing dice
And watching as they roll.
Inside my head,
I still feel the dread,
But I let it go
Burying this wretched hole,

When did this girl appear,
In the mirror,
Scratched but clear:
Tears in eyes and scars, she says
that, "I don't Know."
Sometime I hope she'll be, 
Back in me,
Honestly,
One day this mirror will show,
Someone that I know.

PARODY OF REFLECTION; MULAN @Dec2012


Details | Ballad | |

Behold A Nation

Let's presume all is well
Though we know truly in our minds
That we are still crawling
Like a snail under its shielded carapace.

Let's presume it is well
Though we know we are not yet there
Midst nepotism and bureaucracy politics
In that which our nation is canonized

Furtherance into our country web of hierarchy
Will renounce your reliable imaginations,
Your emotional inappropriate findings,
And your shortsighted quest around time and space.

Believe it or not
Their says must be well felt
Since they are the holder
Of anything go transient tools.

In doubt or not in doubt
Mysteries will sooner than later
Unveil themselves in due time
This is not far from our reach.


Details | Ballad | |

My addiction

I have an addiction...
It dont matter what time of day it is my addiction is there...
Not always in the literall since...
But it is always on my mind...
I lay my head down to sleep at night thinking about you...
I sleep dreaming about you...
I wake up thinking about you...
Your always on my mind...
No matter what I do my addiction is always on my mind...
Even if your not the last one I talk to before I lay my head down to sleep...
I still lay my head down thinking of you...
I just cant get enought of you...
No matter what my addiction is there...
My addiction has a name...
Her name is Shelby Nestle...
No matter how much we text or talk on the phone...
Its never enough...
I cant get enough of your beautiful eyes...
I cant get enough of that beautiful smile...
I cant get enough of kissing your soft lips...
That feeling I get inside when our lips touch...
Or holding you in my arms...
This is a new addiction to me...
Never have I been this addicted this quick...
It scares the shyt outta me...
But then I love it...
You are my new addiction baby... 
You are my...
My heroin...
My ecstacy... 
My cocaine...
You are my own personal drug...
I cant imagine and addiction stronger...
You are my addiction...
I wouldnt even think about trying to break this addiction...
I wouldnt go to rehab for this addiction...
I like it to much...
YOU ARE PERFECT JUST THE WAY YOU ARE


Details | Ballad | |

P.S. I'm The Salesman

I spill my heart,
I spill my guts,
And you may ask,
Why all this fuss?

Owners Selling Dogs,
Owners Selling Guns,
Oh there is more,
And it's been great fun.

Day after day, month after month,
Countless are the hours I spend,
To create this behemoth,
Seemingly to no end.

Owners Selling Cars,
Owners Selling Trucks,
Oh there is so much more,
But I'm having no luck.

So to you I turn,
To seek your advice,
Do I have more to learn,
Or will this suffice?

Owners Selling Motorcycles,
Owners Selling Motorhomes,
But one thing I just wish is,
I didn't have to do this on my own.

No brokers, no dealers,
No agents or salesmen,
You'd think that clients,
Would now be rushing in.

Owners Selling Businesses,
Owners Selling Real Estate,
Look and you will find,
The greatest I could create.

So if you have the time,
To surf the net some,
Check out my sites,
And just add dot com

Owners Selling Boats,
Owners Selling Land,
Please just take a look,
P.S. I'm the salesman.


Details | Ballad | |

Heart Broken

Four years filled with Happiness,
suddenly ripped away,
When coming home from work to find out,
your not the only one he seems to want,
 she was suppose to be your best friend ,
 your beloved sister, 
It turns out she was only your competittor,
 to get your first and only love.
A heart so broken,
 a soul not at rest,
 or contented to ever love another.
Only to be comfortd by people who are considered your brother.


Details | Ballad | |

Last night I dreamt

Last night I dreamed

The dream I had was all in white
As pure as driven snow
And the whiteness of it all
Did bring me down quite low
There was something very scary there 
In the whiteness of it all
The sameness there in everything
Kind of drove me up the wall.

I looked into the neighbours yard
As the sun was shining bright
I heard an infant screaming loud
There bathed within the sunlight
Was parked a pram upon the lawn
Which glowed with mystery
My mother’s passion was aroused
I took a look to see

I peeped into that pure white pram 
A babe was lying there
All swaddled in a pure white shawl
Just white was everywhere
The whole wide world, Was beamed in light
It was a scary feel 
I found myself in corridors 
This place it seemed unreal.

Each corridor was long and winding
Like serpents, in my dream
And everywhere were locked, white rooms
This place to me it seemed
Like a hospital, insane asylum
Or something of this kind
I just ran round, and round, and round
With panic in my mind.

I could not find my room at all
And every one I asked
Just looked at me with blank expressions
It was a mammoth task
Trying to find where I was at
It almost drove me mad
And then I saw my. Daughter there
And boy! this made her glad.

She handed me the baby
And told me loudly “Take it”
And then I woke up from my sleep
It made me think a bit
As to what this dream was all about
It was the strangest dream
I’d love to get into my mind
And find out what it means.

28 July 2013 @ 1417hrs.


Serious.


Details | Ballad | |

Loosing A Child

It hurts very much,
When the one's you love,
Are ripped from your very life,
It makes you feel as if,
You are not up to being,
The person you should be,
In this dreary everyday world,
That can be so cruel.
So, think about how your life,
Is running it's very course,
And what changes you need to make'
To better your life,
In order to see the happiness,
Of keeping the beautiful thing,
You have created,
And brought into this very world,
So, you can keep this child,
Close to you in your life,
And watch it grow,
To bond with them each and everyday,
So, the child will never grow up,
knowing someone else,
As Mom and Dad,
Pushing you away from their life,
Till the day,
You will be totally gone,
From their hearts and minds,
Which is the sign of disaster all the way,
For it will be the hurt of a lifetime.


Details | Ballad | |

Battle

Is it quiet enough here in your head? The chaos of the mind has subsided to a dull roar. The battle with self has come to a stalemate. Both sides have withdrawn, not in retreat, but in an attempt to resupply.


The rancid smell of past thoughts permeate your senses. Memories are left strewn across the war-zone, their death stark upon your emotions. It is time to recruit new dreams to send into the fight, to become heroes; or be left for dead on the battlefield in your head.


That the battle could be won says nothing of the war in your soul. It is here that the conflict escalates to nuclear proportions. Even though you hold your fingers over the button, your resolve is smashed. You bring those trembling fingers to your face, wipe the tears, and know you have failed again.


Or is it failure when you live to fight another day? A simple foot soldier in the trenches of yesterday never believes they are the future General of tomorrow. Often you live in the present fight, with tunnel vision focused on the enemy surrounding you. It is hell when you realize that the enemy is only you. But your back is against the wall and you are not accustomed to losing.


And the battle rages on, dreams are shattered against the front lines of reality. The masses engulf the weak; will is broken. The once barren plains now run red with the blood of hope. The skies are clouded with the mists of loss and the scent on the air induces the desire to stop breathing forever.


The last sounds you hear are screams. You never realize that the screams are your own.


Details | Ballad | |

A Dead Girl's Final Wish

Music is my home,
Written when I am alone.
Nobody is hear to save me as I slash
 my wrists and they turn scarlet.
 My mother and father walks through the door,
 my mother screams and ,
my father seems dazed,
The doctor say if it was not for the fact,
 That my heart was not strong i would have survived,
The boy and girl who pushed me to commit sucide,
 spits  and dance on my grave,
they defile it and call me names,
 even though i am dead i will still hear them,
talk and say mean things,
to my mother and father,
They spread rumors that are untrue,
A voice calls out and asks me what
I want to do?
 I cry out let me live give me a second chance,
I'll grant you this calls the voice,
The next thing I know I am in a hospital in the intensive care unit,
I try to speak my mother puts her finger to my lips she is crying,
i Had been on the way to the morgue when my eyes open and i started to breathe,
The same bestfriend who i have known all my life has finally shown her jealous side 
 and called me a witch, and a zombie, or even a creature from hell.
They Took her to the other side of the hospital and put her in the physchartric unit,
The boy went to jail for attempted murder and i knew i had a plan lined all out for me


Details | Ballad | |

Isolation

How can I tell you?
I can't stay with you.

Neither I can give up on you.
Fear of losing you is losing me.
It feels like slow death every night.

But we are just stuck in our spaces!
Unable to connect from two feet distance.


Details | Ballad | |

the poverty blues song

I've got damp on my walls and cobwebs in the hall
got a rat in the kitchen
where the cockroach crawl.
I got holes in my shoes
where my toes peep through
I got a bad case of the poverty blues.

I got a crack in my bathtub and bed bugs in my bed
I got things crawlin through my hair
that make me scratch my head

Got piles of bills collected by my door
the one's I should have paid a year or two or more.
I try to get myself sorted
but always seem to lose
I got a bad case of the poverty blues.

Guitar.

I got trouble in my hovel
and the place could do with a good clean
I may not be superman
but  I try the best I can
I just find things so hard to do
Guess I got a bad case of the poverty blues.

Some people call me lazy
but I sure ain't crazy
I;m a man alone in the world what can I do
I got a bad case of the poetry blues.

I'd love to meet a girly
who could cook and clean
with lots of money
so I could live my dreams
one thet would say I do
so I no longer got to sing the poverty blues
say I no longer got to sing the poverty  blues uesssssssssssssss.

Peter Dome copyright. 2012.


Details | Ballad | |

Night's cry



What I have done?
When the distance of the lusty killing 
	Or the thing he has touched, the hours that brazen
On the peak of this wind's falls, the beauty
	Thought which I was still sleeping 
With pain I could feel, you're still walking 
	The wounds upon the strangled memory I hold,
All become so unhealthy, implored, and hard to swallow.


What I have done?
For many who have dreamed or were just drifting
	The treasure of living up into the exhaustless dawn, 
The brave word I loved or it never was.
	How could I fail if I am the same bloody
Soul you have made me to believe on you?

	Tell me, dear morning, or you dying evening,
For what I fell by giving you all my love, 
	I've failed to feel you after you have disappeared!
Shall I say these is love, fondled declaration,
	Or just the denial of man's things.

	What a good for it when at every dream I have been
Or the waves I watched through the window of the night
	And now, the holy light of this day blinded me
And surpassing me what I felt all have already gone!
		Tell me, please, what I have done?
 


Details | Ballad | |

Cassandra

Revelation Said In Stone Appeared an Eon ago of Shame and Sin, Something we all know But not it's rise, For is has already became Virtue Flaming Skies from an Angel So Bright The World's Cure for Soul-Blight A Hell on Earth A Savior's Worth So many Dreams are cast then Forgotten So many lives are brought up then just Thrown back down Maybe she is The Cure Maybe she is The Plan All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim Release me and Burn away this land Hold me by The Hand Tell me the past is just pretend Give me The Cure If this is your destiny Then May it be mine I would die in time I'm Just another Obstacle In the way of your divine Wings Forget me Cassandra For Doom was already meant for me All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim Valkyrie of Heart Angel of Grace I surrender to You Savior by Destiny Dispel all Tragedy Especially me All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim


Details | Ballad | |

A Better Life...

A Better Life

I don't know why she hides,
I don't know why she shivers,
I don't know why she cries,
I don't know why she quivers,

Daddy's girl is all alone,
And I don't know how to help her,
Daddy's world is all but blown,
And I don't know what to tell her,

What happened to her confidence,
And her self assured way,
Which used to be so prominent,
In all she did or would say,

Who stole my little girl’s heart,
And drove her to such confusion,
She now slowly does her part,
As if all she has is illusion,

She knows I would kill any other man,
For doing such harm to my little girl,
But this is much more than I can stand,
As it has forever blown apart my world,

They took ‘steps’ to the next level,
And now they each look to me in despair,
I warned them each to be careful,
But the forbidden fruit they shared,

Now I look at one without trust,
Yet I still love my son so very much,
I still hold her distant as I must,
But she needs Daddy’s healing touch,

Why do I have to be the bad guy,
When my children need my help,
I pushed one out and I still cry,
While I can't help her help herself,

There is no way to win here,
And my tears won't stop falling,
I have lost them both I fear,
And my fears won't stop calling,

I don’t know what to do anymore,
Or how I can help either of them,
Both children my heart cries out for,
But the truth is neither can win, 

And for this my darling kids,
I am so sorry I can’t decide,
Which to disown or which to kiss,
When I am actually on both your sides,

So I pray that both her and him,
Of whom I am so very proud,
Do not give up and become victims,
Who wear this pain like a shroud,

I pray both of you hear my advice,
Get over this hardship and understand,
This lesson with its terrible price,
Is one where you do as best you can,

To forgive and move on from here,
Without Dad having to choose a side,
And to let go of all that you fear,
If you want to grow to have a better life.


Details | Ballad | |

A Hopeless Being

A Hopeless Being.
 

Oh Lord! Before in hell forsake,
dreams do remove from all the men;
strip them, their hope away do take,
or shall in hell rebel again.
 
The dreams I dream they aren't mine,
but of that learner courting hope,
at nightfall are a humble shrine,
in peaceful slumber envelop.
in sleep such obscure visions come,
while vulnerable am I whole,
the hostile sights my heart do thrum,
in mixed melody is my soul;
their beauty what does signify,
and those faces that are ne'er real!
Now do our breaths they dignify
or negate all --that we do feel.
Is poor most a dreamless being,
with flightless nights and yearnings sour,
his curse is a mind of stable seeing,
disowning growth forevermore.
Isn't useless hope that ne'er pays,
is present yet as thin as air,
though in the eye it always stays,
but to the reason seldom there;
these drinks of dreams I do condemn,
but life and death come from this cup,
I might have given up on them,
but will they ever give me up.
 
R.N.Khan, © 2012


Details | Ballad | |

The sunyassin

As far as I know this is a true story about Alexandra the great...Peter



The Sannyasin.

Alexander said to Dandamis
"Old man you come with me
For I need me a sannyasin
To take across the seas.
Hey you be just a beggar man
I'll make you rich indeed
You'll live a life of luxury
With everything you need.

Dandamis standing naked there
With silence in his essence
He had no fear at all did he
In the mighty leaders presence.
He said "I'll give you nothing friend
And there's nothing that I need
So Alexandra drew his sword
Tried to make the beggar plead.

Dandamis laughed and said these words
With power in his voice
"You can put that sword right through my heart
My friend, that be your choice.
But I left this body long ago
I have no use for it
So pierce this heart my fine young friend
It won't harm me a bit.

Alexander he was beaten
By a fearless beggar man
Though he had won most of the world
Dandamis foiled his plans.
The beggar said "You say you're great
But that's not true at all
For any man that thinks he's great
He be merely a fool


Details | Ballad | |

CONQUERING DIVISIONS

I am not made a full blown beauty..
Nor I live a life of purity; charity & piety..
All I like to do is to live with identity..
Not of being a witty but a life of humility..

I tried to be a more social person..
Cracking out the shell I have put up..
Breaking from my own weakness..
Doing best in my found strengths..

I have craved to reach out to people..
Widening my horizon, increasing my knowledge and awareness..
Learning to acknowledge fellow human beings..
Regardless of who they are and where they from..

They said: "I must not do this as it is dangerous.."
but I stand to what I know: "Inside all human beings is the reflection of God.."
I give due and equal chance..
As my God have freely given me opportunities too..

We people are living in same earth..
Different are we because of status, faith or race..
Let not this be the reason for us to be divided..
Rather we must come in unison conquering divisions..

By: olive_eloi
22/10/2013
1:16am


Details | Ballad | |

Dedication To All Those Who Feel Lost

When you are far from home,
Never give up on life,
Cause your family,
Will always be with you,
In you caring heart,
Even when the times,
Get difficult and tough,
And make you want to give up,
They are always there,
For you to turn too,
And show you a way,
To find the peace,
And happiness you need,
In your caring and loving life,
So that one day,
You will find the true love,
That you most certainly deserve,
For that loving heart,
Which is a true fact,
It is a very big heart that cares,
For more than just the person you are,
But those around you,
And the family you have in your life.


Details | Ballad | |

Ballad of Dreams: One: Beneath the Realm part two

Why oh demon have you blocked me from such this place?
Tell me, tell me, I wish to look upon your flawless face
I wish to find that mysterious cloaked figure, walking amongst the dead
his image, his visage appears to me- clouding my head

Take me back to my dreamland, the forests, the fog and the river
Against your touch I no longer shiver
But I implore you, my demon protector take me back to my reality
Do not leave me to continue to face this false fantasy

Bring me back to my dead forest
Where by the brooke I can rest
And I, forever with you, will be free at last
For this reality, will always remain and my love for you grows vast

Above the realm of fantasy
To the blurred lines of the beating heart of Reality
Lies this secret world of the unknown
And a bird, is perched upon the grey castle stone

Contemplatively I watch this bird, such beauty in such a deadened place
His red-black wings, spread as he flys dropping low-almost smacking me in my face
Longingly I yearn to be just as he is, flying content and free
But alas, I am stuck to this broken ground, waiting for you to return to me

My faith in you, is slowly dieing,
heart cracking and crying
I know not why I feel this bond to you
Everything all just so...new

And I wait, and I continue to wait when suddenly there you are
You seem so close-like I can feel you-though you are distant and far
But it doesn't matter because you've returned me and now I am complete in my home
Down here below lost in the unkown

Where no one can find me 
And you and I are free
To spead out times wandering aimlessly through the forest dead
Where the inhabitants of this land do not tread

And my mysterious dark figured friend
Watches over me, always been the protector in the end
But to you my heart belongs
And only to you will it ever belong

Beneathe the lines of reality
Lies a secret- a world of fantasty
I find this place often in my dreams-with the castle on the hil, it's faded stone
Down here in the dream of false reality, lieing fantasy-is all to be known


Details | Ballad | |

dilemma

THE DILEMMA
The rush in blood makes me startle
So shocked i can’t but stare in marvel
I see myself been raped but dumb-puzzle
I fear the blackmail so let it go with no tussle

She said she wants me so bad her lips forced on mine
Her breast curled on me with forceful my soul on pine
It cries out for vengeance against this crime
Who would believe rape’ a man in his prime?

I saw my name about to soil in all frames
My sense was stocked my conscience in disdain
She wants and i don’t, i see her been pained
She can kill if she can’t have me-she stains

Who would ever believe my story?
And to whom would i share my worry
Could this be love, my life is in a hurry
It’s was  a dilemma how i got out i can’t tell easy.










Details | Ballad | |

Starcrossed Tragedy

A Silent Night's Hunt for a Tigress so blunt, Left the Fiend dancing with my Thisbe's Cloack But where was She? Her Drenching blood is all I can see The Night of Sanguine, The Night of Rapture, Tonight was meant to be All Behold This Tragedy ran by Dark Energy, My Lost Lover's Plea A seed of what is to come, In this starcrossed Tragedy, For I can not live without you, My Pyramus, All I need, My reason to Breathe One sight of me bleeding away from reality, started this tragedy and with me It shall Grow The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy A Star traveling across the moonless Night Sky, In the mid-summer of Verona, Fell from her glorious light, I have lost my guide, My need for Life Every balcony I'll climb for you, Just to Caress you once more But now it is too Late, My Juilet Let the Poison Fill me My Body dyed In silence, Dipped in Paralysis, Forging the Will of God, Feigning the Clutches of Death, My Romeo I prithee to you, See past The Illusion, Caught in the Webs of Love's delusion A Dagger reached my heart once To see you martyr for our love A Dagger reached my heart twice The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy Once the Morning Retired from her weeping The sun shined into her eyes, then his Lifeless, their dream will live on Every Petal will be Avenged The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy


Details | Ballad | |

Echoes of You

For me the sun has closed her eyes
Never to rise again
Darkness is all that surrounds me now
Darkness and echoes of pain

I'm on a journey to nowhere
The road is narrow and long
Walking alone, I stumble and fall
With echoes of you and our song

I try to look to the future, but
I may just as well be blind
The absence of you is all that I see
Echoes of you so defined

Confusion and pain, my constant friends
They never leave me alone
Reminders of all that you and I shared
Echoes I cannot disown

Today or tomorrow will never be mine
I live in a dark, sad place
The past, not the present, is all I can see
In the echoes of your lovely face

Emotional scars are invisible
But the damage is built to last
I wonder, will I ever be free
From echoes of you and the past...


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Ballad | |

Coming out of the shadows

When I was a young man
I spent nigh on a year
In an ugly, war torn country
That drove me close to tears
They sent me home before my time
For my health was down a tad
And my nerves were shot to pieces
Like I was going mad.

They said I had the symptoms of
That post traumatic stress
And so they put me on a pension
Oh I was in a mess!
Anger, stress, anxiety
And paranoid as well
Oh, I was in the darkest place
An awful place to dwell.

I tried so many things, did I
To try to cure this thing
Gurus, shrinks, and self help books
But none of this did bring
The sanity that I did need
I just got worse and worse
As I drove all my love ones out
Oh, I was so damned terse.

Then one day I found this pair
Whilst searching through the net
They taught me how to look at me
How lucky can one get?
The looking made my life so sweet
I’m now completely sane
Each day’s so pure and wonderful
I’m through with all the pain.

15 July 2013 @ 1340hrs.




Details | Ballad | |

Corpse Bride

The braeþ of lyf -- I've Learned to fear
Though, ta'en it was, so long sinsyne
I've wroot my song of skreighs
He tore the lyf out of me
In sooth did she speke this to me - Cassandra was she to me
Wistful - I am no bride to be
Wistful - is this soliloquy of skreighs

I cede to thee, deathly colleen 
Though remains - façades of humanity 
Angel kind - wicce of my welkin dreams
Casted by the lote of she
Ta'en the hollow Herefro way - ne'er!
Caught with twain
W'ie or swain

Angel dearest so fair - love does not share
Seemed a crux, when eath is lone
I rose for thee - cede all of thy love to me
Or was this not meant to be
Eros's deceit 
So wistful - corpse bride I remain to be


Details | Ballad | |

Italy

The place where i once dewelled,
The place where my mother and father honey mooned,
the place where i was created,
the place where i now face hardships.
 the place now where i only see and visit graves of those i have lost.
the place  where i have dreamed many dreams.
Now the place i will never see.
Please people in Italy dream big dreams for me.
Even though I am afraid of what those dreams might be.
I know one day I have to face my destiny,
But  I am afraid of what I might become and what I might bring,
upon myself.
so i have to stay out of the rain,
and  thank mother earth 
that i have not become,
insane.


Details | Ballad | |

i am woman

I am a woman 
a player 
a saivior 
a friend 
I am a mom
a warrior to the bitter end 
I am a lover
that bends all my needs
i am a singer 
that needs to breath
i am a lion 
that cant be tamed
i have  many names 
but I 
am a woman


Details | Ballad | |

GRADE OF GREED

Greed is greed
Is greed in greed?
No greed no grade?
Greed of grade
Is grade is a greed?
Real greed is greed.
Greed is danger.
A danger is greed.
Greed oh greed
Stop the greed.
Who is greed?
Greed is greed
And what is greed
And greed is what?
Its greed, greed of agreed
Agreed to greed
A grade!
Oh greed
Lovely greed
A real greed is dangerous
Dangerous of greed
It’s in a higher grade
People are poor are by greed
People are rich are of greed.
Oh greed!


Details | Ballad | |

from a father to be

I grew up without a father,
never dealing with it inside
only getting used to the absence
bt the lack did not subside.
i never learnt to fix whats broken
never learnt to be a man
never learnt to swim or sail
never thought i really can.

My father left me only fear
that i was now incompetent
to be the father he was not
to have a child, im hesitant.
But still hope withers not away
that i could be so blessed one day
to hold a gift given by God
and live to have a family.

My father left me only fear
that i might abandon my own
but children i hold very dear
and wish they not be left alone,
to fend for themselves without the guide
but have a father to be shown.
To those who, appreciate
your fathers heart, its not too late
this day is just a reminder,
 that those who have fathers
life treated kinder.


Details | Ballad | |

Deja Vu (Song)

I gave you  all of me,
Your wants became too much,
And all of my somethings
You saw as not enough,
But now you are wanting,
Everything you passed up,
Your lies are frustrating,
But still I can't pass up,

This pain, this place,
Is looking too familiar to me,
The same mistakes
Are coming back around,
Your games, your face,
Are secretly whispering to me,
I can't escape,
Because emotions tear me down,

Hold on, hold on,
Tell me what I'm running into,
Stay gone, stay gone,
Is what I want to do,
So long, so long,
Why can't I say these words to you,
When I know, I know,
This will be Deja Vu

As I am anticipating
Loving you and no one else
My entire body's shaking,
Because I promised myself,
That I would never be back here,
A toy sitting on  your shelf,
We always begin in last gear,
By later, there's nothing left...

This pain, this place,
Is looking too familiar to me,
The same mistakes
Are coming back around,
Your games, your face,
Are secretly whispering to me,
I can't escape,
Because emotions tear me down,

Hold on, hold on,
Tell me what I'm running into,
Stay gone, stay gone,
Is what I want to do,
So long, so long,
Why can't I say these words to you,
When I know, I know,
This will be Deja Vu

Why am I
Addicted to you,
Saying goodbye
never comes true,
This is what 
it always comes to,
You constantly on my mind!

Why must I 
stay thinking of you
Coming back
Thinking I love you
Losing control
when I touch you,
Wasting all of my time...

This pain, this place,
Is secretly whispering to me
Your games, your face,
Are looking too familiar to me,
The same mistakes
Emotions seem to tear me down,
I can't escape
It's coming back around,

Hold on, hold on,
is all I ever do for you,
Stay gone, stay gone,
I do and don't want you to do,
I love you, I hate you,
Everything I say is true,
I hate you, I love you...
This is our Deja vu....


Details | Ballad | |

The lovely Libran

The lovely Libran

Indecision dogs her trail
She’ll always change her mind
Her sense of wonder is so vast
She’s tender and she’s kind
Creative in the way she lives
Her whole life is an art
She can be lazy sometimes too
But she has a lovely heart.

She loves to dress herself in style
Immaculate is she
She’ll always be the peacemaker
For she can’t bear to be
In any kind of situation
Where ugliness is seen
She hates hassles very much
And hates those who are mean.

One to one relationships
She needs them in her life
She needs to have a partner
Or to be somebodies wife
She likes to be surrounded by
Pure beauty everywhere
She weighs her scales so carefully
And always she is fair.

13 August 2013 @ 2004hrs.


Details | Ballad | |

Lady Arcane

[Daughters of Lamia] Today we walk from our graves You can't wish, pray it away The Inflamed Coven's emerged You Will receive what you deserve Retribution of the flaming shade Your Malice will be paid, In Harm's way [Aharhel] Her Convoluted face burning with fear Of the fall of the gate seering their minds with the deft of the legion The Army of the plague Scourges your land Scourges your Children Scourges your hope [Lady Arcane] I, The White Madonna - The Poison Mistress Hold The Rose to Salvation - Hold The Fruit to Arcane Closer, Come, Child you are mine [Daughter's of Lamia] Lady Arcane wants your fear Lady Arcane wants you near Lady Arcan is here Lurking In your tears clinging to your spilled blood the east has always been near The Left hand reaches to the right side in disguise In Malice's Disguise Therionacy break you down to thy knees To Thy Knees!


Details | Ballad | |

The Crossroads

Caught between the crossroads My mind was boggled…..I couldn't choose. Both ways led to happiness, But one I’d eventually lose. Both were marked by beauty That was bestowed by God above; And as I stood there so confused I yearned to find my true love. Baffled I took a step forward And I followed the path to the right, But halfway through I realized That the other one was equally fine So I turned and headed back, Back to the point where the crossroads did meet. Now I hesitated to take the other road since I knew that I would soon retreat. I sat myself down and took off my bag, My head just throbbing due to the heat I sipped on some water and quenched my thirst, As I stretched my aching feet Then suddenly a gust of wind blew in my face… The dust blinding me momentarily; When I opened my eyes….I realized the crossroads were gone…… a straight road remained


Details | Ballad | |

Questions

What will the day bring do we ever know?
Could it be the sun shining bright or flowers that grow
Or maybe a surprise storm that’s brewing out there
We just never know, should we always beware?

Is it a chance meeting of a friend or lending a hand?
Or eating a meal that is ever so grand
Is it a work day where everything goes right?
Maybe you saw something that gave you a fright

We just never know from day to day
Maybe it’s been a day full of play
Or a full moon lighting your way
As you kneel at bedtime and begin to pray

So when you rise the next day and start your way
Try to do good and don’t go astray
You have this one life to do what you can
And hope things turn out the way that you plan.


Details | Ballad | |

We Are But Clay

We are but clay,
Soon to crumble to dust, fade 'way-
After the Cold Hand's call
And the dead bells' knell

We are no more than memories-
In the mind of an amnesic-
Our voices timely lullabies
Our ideas bombs on count-down.

Soon the winds start browling,
And the seas a-raiding
No more singing birds
As nature sinks to sleep-

The somnolence weighs over mankind
The latter, like Jezebel, is but having a make-up.

Behold the mask, behold the impostors!
Humans veiled to conceal scalding faces:
No mourning veils, no remorse
As humans take another shape.


Details | Ballad | |

Cheater

A stab in the back,
a feeling that I cannot squelch,
a horrible impending heartbreak,
as the news leak out,
time seems to stop knowing,
that you have caught him,
in your home with not you,
but your, best friend.
he tries to make it up,
saying to just move on like it never happened,
but your trust is shattered like;
a thousand tiny pieces of glass
waiting to sinking in your flesh to hurt,
and betray you once again.
a cheaters lie of saying I love you.
yet knowing its not the truth.


Details | Ballad | |

minutes

when instant gratification
just isn't fast enough
the sun still heats your morning
the full moon calls your bluff
the saguaro has no answers
the nightingale has been snuffed
you call upon me for wisdom
you don't have the right stuff

momma raised you better
but you go off half cocked
leaving all around you
pretty much shell-shocked
you've been running for miles
just not outside of your block
and you are always racing...
racing against the clock

in the end you loved
exactly what you picked
fate is a lonely hunter
consequence makes you sick
you're in way too deep
fog grows white and thick
the second hand keeps running
as the minutes slowly click


Details | Ballad | |

Deirdre

 
Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? I can sence her embrace that feels like Tragedy A heart to have, slipped beneath the waves The dark pulse now beckons us closer How many days will this passion bleed away? We will be the ones left to blame Beware we’ve become their prey They say you’re addicted to your pain A lifeless cold barren soul left to die in the rain A whisper too close to the edge A call from the dark Brings out a saving spark An Exodus from her Pain Her Life Spent breathing in Shame A Shadow Call breaks the Silence Am I the one to blame? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? “My Decadence was just for you Though you’d never care what I’ve been through Enter the world were empathy is clandestine A world created by you, just for me What’s Lying in my heart is why You want to through the stone” I call your name towards nightfall’s reign But they take you so far away A dark angel so divine Cursed by Eden’s heart I will avenge every tear An Exodus from her Pain Her Life Spent breathing in Shame A Shadow Call breaks the Silence Am I the one to blame? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone?


Details | Ballad | |

What I Know

I know 

That falling out of love with you

Is what I am supposed to do

It seems it is time

Time to start looking forward 

Leave the past behind

But when you left

You took my heart 

Don’t want to love you anymore 

Don’t want to see my heaven in your eyes

Don’t want to miss you

Don’t want to cry

Don’t want to keep asking why 

You changed my world

When you said goodbye

When will I ever feel 

Ready for love again? 

To be held again 

By anyone but you?

If you ever find 

That I cross your mind

If you ever find 

You want a love that is true

I’ll be here

Loving you still

Waiting for you

And at the end of the day

Lord I pray

You might find love for me

So I tell myself to hold on

Till these feelings are gone



Details | Ballad | |

a place in time

in the masquerading dawn
sun rising slowly across the lawn
all the dreams from the night before
don’t really matter anymore

coffee clears my foggy brain
and those old thoughts that still remain
warmed by rays of a new day
cold to the bone by months of rain

how do I sort out the truth?
all that begins and ends with you
am I all or just a place?
a place that holds a tiny space

you swear I am the only one
been that way since we’ve begun
you build on lines that worked before 
still ajar is the  backdoor

an ace stuck in a ticking spoke
on the road to never ending hope
too little pay for so much work
a heart that hides a world of hurt


Details | Ballad | |

Listen To My Heart

Baby, My love, please listen to my heart,
You keep doing things to me without thinking,
And it tares my heart apart,
Which always brings me to my knees,
But sometimes it's like you don't care,
What you keep doing to my life,
Even though everyone else knows,
What you are doing cause they can see.

So, if you ever wonder why,
Things never work out with,
Anyone else before,
You always need to see,
The person you have become,
Cause you're not the person I once knew,
Or fell deeply in love with,
And after all this time,
I feel you are not the person you can be.

Search your heart and your life,
And see what it is you really want,
And what it will really take,
For you to get it in your life and keep it,
And if you don't work hard enough,
It will leave you empty by your own mistakes.

It takes a lot of hard work,
Between two people,
To make things work out,
And if either of the two gives up,
Before their time,
Things will crumble to the ground,
Which will hurt more than just one person,
Cause sometimes there are other's involved,
Which means hurting the little one's is never kind.


Details | Ballad | |

To A Missing Love

I miss the days,
We shared together,
And the love we shared,
When it was there,
Believe it or not,
My love for you,
Will always remain,
In my heart,
No matter where you may go,
For we have been,
Through a whole lot together,
That shows my love for you,
Is as true as it becomes,
For one day you will see,
That no one will stand beside you,
The way that I have,
During these troubled times,
And never leave your side,
To be there through thick and thin,
The way I was for you,
Being very true during each forsaken time,
Even though you were pushing me away,
By doing what you did,
Which caused us many problems,
I felt as if everyone else mattered,
More to you,
Than me.


Details | Ballad | |

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nothing gold can stay.
Sometimes u find it slips away,
Something close that u can touch,
But in the end it was to much,
Like a flood flowing through a city,
Life is hard when u live in pity,
Things may be good but turn bad,
Sometimes it makes u really sad,
Days and nights may go,
Just have to live life nice and slow,
Maybe somethings may not be right,
Its never good to pick a fight,
Sometimes u find it slips away,
Nothing gold can stay.


Details | Ballad | |

The dead line

Better look to the lamb
and fall to your knees
for the Reaper
witnesses all that he sees
 
This fallen angel’s
made a career of evil
the father of sin
this black/red coated devil
 
He minds over death’s valley
With his hot road to Hell
and with determined temptation
will lure you with his spell
 
He’ll sit by your shoulder
and by ill thought word or deed
your conscience will torture
and your pained soul shall bleed
 
This masterful serpent
with fire of unknown origin
whose pit of raging flames
is the prize that you’ll win
 
So beware of the tongue
and do what is right
stay away from the darkness
and look only to the light


Details | Ballad | |

A Broken Fairytale

Once upon a time, 
Almost 6 years ago,
A boy met a girl
With his best friend in toe.
This boy and this girl
Became young love in its essence.
His best friend became what some would call
Her own personal hidden blessing.
His devotion for his friend
Couldn't quite bring him to confess,
But he cared about that girl enough,
To warn her of future distress.

After 3 long years,
Of the back and forth romance,
Their young love finally ended,
The girl was broken hearted and defenceless.
She had given her all
To someone who was only willing to take it.
The best friend tried to warn her,
But she couldn't see her lover fake it.

A year would pass,
Before the best friend would find,
His best friend's ex,
The one he longed to say was "mine".
A birthday of hers
Was his golden opportunity.
When he missed her night out,
He offered to take her to a movie.
She wrestled with the thought:
Do I open that door?
She kept pushing it off,
Until she couldn't avoid it anymore.
Neither one of them expected,
Or even could dream
Of all that would come
From one night, one movie.

A love affair of sorts,
Filled with constant ups and downs,
But despite their best efforts,
They couldn't help but stick around.
A year and 2 months
Of the greatest love that ever lived,
Was shared between these two,
Who were only just kids.
Neither one of them was ready,
They didn't know what to do,
They loved so deeply,
But this experience was so new.
A girl with a broken heart,
With no sense of true self worth,
Met a boy with a broken heart,
And the desire to move forth,
With her by his side,
Forever hand in hand,
Yet she felt she didn't deserve him,
And did what she could: she ran.

Now her love for him consumes her,
But his heart is in pieces.
Now he's too afraid of her
But his love he swears never ceases.
And she cries herself to sleep at night,
For the best friend she hurt foolishly.
And she prays for their future together,
The one he says can never be.


Details | Ballad | |

The Real Me

Everyone says I'm different,
Says that I have changed.
I think differently.
I'm just finding me.

Everyone says "Your life's wasted"
Says I'm going nowhere.
I think differently.
I'm just finding me.

Everyone slowly leaves.
They say I'm all alone.
I think differently.
I'm just finding me.

Everyone shows me things from the past,
Tries to show what they think they know.
I think differently.
I'm just finding me.

Sitting alone with nothing and noone,
I look at things left behind.
I'm still thinking differently.
I was just finding me.

I look over it all again and again,
Looking for something to show.
Now, I think differently.
I lost the real me.


Details | Ballad | |

In Your Eyes

 I looked into your eyes . Saw your pain .
It was no surprise . I knew what you’d been through…

I saw you cut, Blood on the floor .
Life passing you by, Your now a shell of you.

He took it away . Bit at a time . Even came back for more…
That man of no use, Who stole your youth .

How did it happen, When did it begin .
Lost in a world, Of times and dates…
Where, when and why me you asked ?

Nobody knew, Not even you, Too young to remember.
What he took , Was it real . The monsters hurt .
You try so hard, Too young to understand.

They sent you away, They never knew…
You begged to stay, They didn’t listen.
Nobody believed, What you tried to say .

To be hurt by so many, Didn’t make sense .
Your youth was gone, He stole it from you .
You done nothing wrong .

He took your youth . Don’t let him win.
 He took away your child hood . Left you in fear…

Don’t give him your adulthood too.
Open your eyes and see 


Details | Ballad | |

The Monster

 It came from beneath the swamp
 to look for the one he lost
 it went around the marsh to romp
 even though it was a deadly cost

 The woman in the house
 with her husband on the loose
 her boyfriend silent as a mouse
 was getting the booze

 and the thing came through the door
 confused, and looking for his wife
 when he saw her new boyfriend roar
 he nearly took away his life

 the wife, happy to reunite
 the husband, happy she's alive
 and she took one look at him in the light
 and struck him with a knife


Details | Ballad | |

No comprehension

Is it me? Or do I just not comprehend? When I do comprehend you look at me crazy, when I do not comprehend you look at me like, “you’re just proving us right.” Or is it that you don’t want to comprehend on purpose? Because when they don’t comprehend with you, you kind of feel crazy then you think let me just go along with it because it is not worth it for you to get ignorant with a person who has already achieved that goal. My definition of no comprehension is not listening to one who speaks carefully or not paying attention. To all of you who do not comprehend LISTEN TO A PERSON FOR WHOM THEY ARE ON THE INSIDE, AND NOT WHAT THEY APPEAR TO BE ON THE OUTSIDE. 


Details | Ballad | |

An Escape From You

Can I stop the sobs
Am I strong enough
To escape their evil
To deny what’s real

I ask myself why God would
Stick me in this jail, my own hell
So if I get help I might not feel
My own manic episodes, this is real

Am I bleeding
Am I seeing the truth
Or is it just a way
To deny my love for you

They say 
Just pop a pill
To numb 
All that can’t heal

Can I stop the sobs
Am I strong enough
To escape their evil
To deny what’s real

Is it delaying the problem
Is it sticking a bandage
On a broken arm
Am I covering the truth
Is it an escape from you

I have no idea
If it’s the right thing to do
But all I know is
I must forget you

So I’ll take this bitter pill
And I’ll conceal my inner hell 
Cause it’s all I can do
To stop loving  you


Details | Ballad | |

Queen of The Vultures

One step into her aflamed path
With even an intention so good
Anyone could, yet none should
She knits your lips with her name
So you won't remember 
the one who's heart you hold
Your lovers' bane

Her Eden's Revenge is all she contains
The destruction of your soul is all that remains
The Queen of Vultures and Wargs
She serves Asmodeus and nothingmore
Sitra Achra you will surely find
Misstress of Mayhem
The lights grow dim 
You've found the blood of your love

"Just dream if it was only you and me
Far into the left side far from The Hand of God
Run with me into the deeps of Sitra Achra"


Details | Ballad | |

A Reason

i walk down these halls
pass people who say rude remarks
behind my back they just laugh
i look down counting 
the tiles on the floor 
the way they snicker
they must think its all just a game
if they knew what i go home to
maybe they'd be nicer
if they knew 
i need a reason to live
a reason to cry
a reason to feel 
what ive been keeping inside 
a reason to smile when you walk by
please save me from this torture called life
day after day goes by 
the cuts on my arm 
get deeper with time 
the kids look at the bruises on my arms
i just duck and hide
save me now before i find a reason to kill myself
im drowning in my own made waterfall
someone please help


Details | Ballad | |

Please come back to me

It’s the 17th again today
Cant believe how time has flown
The day since you left me
All alone

At first I felt free
I spread my wings to fly 
Now I realise flying is hard 
If you have to learn it alone

Was I bad for you
Why did you pack your bags
I am bleeding by your words
Goodbye

I still look at photos 
Wanting you here 
I still put them in frame 
As if your still here

But realising you have left me
I’m bleeding in the dark
My feelings running around
I cant control my heart

Please come back to me an changed man
As I have worked to hard to let you go
I want to wake up in your arms 
One last time o, no


Details | Ballad | |

Past The Last December

Inheritance squandered and strewn, appearing to discard his lessons of life, 
He became a wandering fool, starting over again and again, 
The destruction left in his wake, seemed to leave him nothing but torment and strife, 
But lessons learned along the way, secretly were stashed and kept by him, 

Now with greatest potential, finally he commits to redemption, 
Believing it essential, to share the knowledge of what he has learned, 
Our hapless fool now sets out, to design a most worthy commission, 
Which would finally allow, him to teach these lessons he has discerned, 

But now he knows he has gone, long past his last December, 
He’s seen far beyond, what any man should ever see, 
Now he knows much more, than he cares to remember, 
For this life-long tour, defined who he has come to be, 

He is a transient soul, never wary or vigilant, 
Yet ever watchful he grows… in the knowledge of his quest, 
But now is history, and the future is eminent, 
Life’s still a mystery, and he didn’t try his best, 

Where are his straws to grasp, and firm ground to stand upon, 
Should he be called to task, for that which he should or shouldn’t have done, 
Where is the ambition, he should have had all along, 
Just what was his mission, and would he have learned a different song, 

Answers can be all too easily found, once you have past your last December, 
But how can a sage’s logic be sound, as all of life’s lessons slowly fade away, 
And will he actually care, once there is much less to remember, 
As he has less and less to share… ignorance is bliss and this is where he will stay. 

So where does a December go, should you forget Spring, Summer and Fall, 
The stark cold winds begin to blow, hope is all but gone and prayers are hard, 
Might grace be found and faith rewarded, once there is nothing you can recall, 
Life’s passions no longer recorded, life’s last cruel and hard lesson plays its card, 

By keeping all doors open, he appeared the accidental sage, 
Holding the keys to wisdom, but the door opened a touch too late, 
For all he can remember, these lessons far too precious to trade, 
Now past his last December, sadly we watch his redemption fade…


Details | Ballad | |

Him, He Cant Forgive

Struggles begin, The pain is deep from within. He's scarred with a mark, His days are so dark. His life has become the dark days, In his troubled bed is where he lays. There is no light, His days are only night. How could he be lost in the memories he relives, How can he blame you when its him, he cant forgive. 

He made his bed and he's stuck, All his life he never had luck. Time slowly passes him by, He has no wings to spread and fly. With each day he thinks he grows stronger, But the distance between him and his inner self has grown longer. He is so far from everything, Its not much longer that his toll from the bell will soon ring. How could he be lost in the memories he relives, How can he blame you when its him, he cant forgive.


Details | Ballad | |

State of the nation

This world is getting tougher to survive everyday.
The cost of living is more than my pay.
It's going to get worse that's what the old folks say.
The bad times are here and here to stay.
Just look at the shape of the U.S.A.
we're afraid to let our children go out and play.
Maybe we all need to get on uor knees and pray.

Jobs are getting harder and harder to find.
What I own ain't worth a dime.
Inflation is up and so is crime.
Alot of real good people are in a bind.
Can't even get care when your in your prime.
Most everyone you know have fallen on hard time.
I can't help them out when i'm worried about saving mine.

Career politicians keep sucking us dry.
They tax everything we own and anything we buy.
Most of us blue collars will work till the day we die.
While the rich skate through life and don't have to try.
We all have to stop living this goverment lie.
It's about time we let that eagle fly.
Remember who made this country, it was you and I.

We the people can bring her back, and put this nation back on track.
We made her strong and that's a fact, and
Noone will ever be able to take away that.


Details | Ballad | |

WHO IS VENUS, REALLY?

From the deep and darkened sea of lust,
On Kythrira's temple shore,
She rose up on a wave of foam;
A goddess to adore,
Described as a beauty filled with love,
In pages of folklore,
But beauty is not what I see
On Kythrira's temple shore.
A life with gifts eternal for
A goddess to adore
So much confusion; heir of Zeus,
or prodigy of war?

Far from the darkened sea she rules,
On her private temple shore.
A feast prepared of sheer delight
To the goddess they adore.
She offered them a tasty feast;
A priestess candy store,
Of Aphrodisiacs that she named
At her private temple shore.

I can see her part re-played; it's clear
She was used much like a whore,
Adorned in gold, and called a pearl
On every temple shore.
Born with seduction as her craft,
This goddess did adore.

She stood much like her statues
With her head up to the sky.
With her eyes up to the sky
She looks much like her virtues,
as she rules upon the shore.
Will she ever lay in ruin,
This goddess they adore?

How sad that someone young and wild didn't get to be a child,
But a goddess to adore.
A poet underneath the trees who called the wind to lend a breeze.
A goddess to adore?
I think not, she was a witch; I would know, I had to switch.
A clever game upon that land, as Satan played a wicked hand.
For he and Venus walked that shore.
She's been his wife along life's shore.


Details | Ballad | |

if every urinal spoke of sense;

if every urinal spoke of sense;
hark-shot nomadic whispers… 
deflationary aspirations… 
palatine teacups and conjunctive juntas…
would you forgo the inevitable...? 


Details | Ballad | |

The road ahead

My mind was just a hazy mess, and truth was far from me,
   common logic grappled fear and reason ran like pee.
So alone,So far from home was not my hearts desire,
    Tucked abreast in some side quest, deep within the fire.
To lay down before you what no man has taught you,
    you saw the unthinkable truth                       
That here your alone nearly chilled to the bone
    And your heart is a'pounding with grief,                 
Hessant foot fumbles as bumbling legs
    swagger their way to the pass,
And looking there on it, you'll naught be beyond it,
    And your mind will fall dead on the grass.
Sweat licks your brow as you thudder n shake 
    as you draw all your energy bay,
And sum all your courage in the last of defiance ,
    To reach the sweet break of the day.
Looking down that winding road,and seeing only darkness,
    But looking back that old dirt track, no going back regardless


Details | Ballad | |

Just Because Of You

I'll write this just because i love you,
I'll write this just because it's true.
I'll write this just because of you,
I'll write this just because i do.

When you smile, I feel alive again,
When you smile, i can feel no pain.
When you smile, my world is free,
When you smile, it feels like you have owned me.

I love you, 
I love you.
I love you,
I love you.


Details | Ballad | |

Circus Insanity

 


    All my life's a circus
    where clowns still dance on my brain
    where elephants fly and tigers get high
     by now your surely insane.

    The retarded goat sippin a rootbeer float
    started belting out a familiar tune
    It had to do with his girlfriend Sue
     and a rather horny baboon.

    A snail eating ice cream started to sneeze 
    but instead blew his brains
    all the performers began to clap
     as you slowly go insane .

    You're up on the tightrope and begin to fall
      as the ringmaster calls your name
     You hit the ground and look around
      and wake up on a plane.

     You land in the tent where the 
      circus freaks dwell
     but beware of what they might steal
      your hanging around upside down
      and fall mentally ill.

     Your friends are all gone
     and your left all alone
     for life has been a game
     You turn on the tube and watch something crude
     as you slowly go insane!


Details | Ballad | |

Therion

Slayer of dreams and reality Bow down to his Therion Majesty Vowed to Be beyond Spiritual Supremacy, But too Frail, but too Weak, Were these words of The Transgressor of Our Argentine Destiny Reigned with Blood And with Blood You shall Fall Never denounce the ways of The Wicked For the Wicked you Have Become I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself Look beyond the Book, See the Truth lying there, Gagged and Hooked, Silence screaming to Be Free The Draconian Revelation Will Save thee The same Cold Pressure has erupt inside The Beast dwells in your Pride Dipped in Argentine and Insanity, Captivated by the touch Never looking beyond the Sin, For the Scene remains Empty I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself In your mind When the world Falls, Parodiso will open her halls But not for you, Inferno Cries out for you Forever Malaoda will Be your destiny I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself


Details | Ballad | |

Lost in the toilet of life

As the razor glides across my wrist
An eruption of life escapes me
With ever drip it escapes me
Into the toilet of life, 
My life blood escapes me.

Too late to turn back
It escapes me,
Slowly drifting off into darkness 
Its escaping me,
Seeing her face walk in the door 
Crying as she holds me in her arms
It escapes me,
With thoughts of regret, 
and the memory of her face,
I am gone…
Forever lost in the toilet of life


Details | Ballad | |

There is some hate behind every pupil

There is some hate behind every pupil-
Hidden by the warm smiles in your eyes.
You shake my Hand with all bliss
And embrace me like a mother-
But there is some evil buried in your thoughts.

The soft sweaty hands
Will soon transform to iron
the very smile to Murder-desire-
Then will I understand
That there was but murder
Cooking in your very veins...


Details | Ballad | |

LIKE AN ANGEL

LIKE AN ANGEL …………………angels…they really do exist…….. 






Looking into your eyes, 
I could see your undying love, 
Your wonderful smile brimming me up in joy, 
I just want to know, what makes you come back, 
To fill my soul with life and joy, 
You make me wonder of my soulless existence. 



Like an angel, you cast your spell upon me, 
Leaving me caught up in my memories. 
Your faith in me makes me to carry on 
To transcend over the horizon, 


You placed your hand upon my empty soul, 
You brought me back to life, 
Making my dreams real, 
Looking towards the sky, I could see your fragnant smile 

Like an angel, you rid me of my perils, 
You caress my soul as if I were your own, 
Dressed in white, you shine your light upon me, 
Helping me to wake from my soulless dream 


Details | Ballad | |

My Reckless Ways

I'm drowning in the tears from the sorrows of my reckless ways, now its just facing the days. If only i could've realized sooner what i have done, now the bricks are crumbling by the ton. Open my eyes and now i see, all i want from you is to forgive me. So you bring that poor dog in from the rain, though he just wants right back out again. I always find myself making the same mistake, i change and things break. Now its tough to see the light, sometimes i wish it was bright. So it could be easier to face the day, nothing gold can stay. Like mud on the pavement, it eventually washes away.....


Details | Ballad | |

A slice of paradise

ups and downs 
i couldn't be found... 
cries and tries 
smiles and frowns... 

hugs and drugs 
sleeping on rugs... 
wet cold nights 
mosquitoes and bugs... 

flights and lights 
nurses in white... 
get well soon 
no family insight... 

thoughts and wishes 
beautiful bridges... 
fights and scars 
and so many stitches... 

hopes and dreams 
a love that sings... 
the one that gleams 
means everything... 

eyes real wide 
a feeling inside... 
should i say goodbye? 
or marry a lie... 

traces of steps 
love or regret... 
bruised and confused 
trying to forget... 

chance a romance 
lets see where we land... 
love the impossible 
with dirt on your hands... 

the seed of a breed 
that grows like a tree... 
the life that i breathe 
has set me free... 

our names in the sand 
with a breeze so nice... 
as we die in the life 
with a slice of paradise...


Details | Ballad | |

Euphorianah'

The sapphire sun of what-were dreams
Setting in the forsaken east
My winters' desperation clung to your silent voice
Let death be a choice
Dusk revealed your truest nature
Before her argentine eyes
'Tis the darkest of tragedies, romances' maladies
Let your forgiveness be la Vie In this frozen air
The wings of my deepest despairs

Friend or foe?
The dagger close to my heart--
If your forgiveness is nigh
Let me know--or is this all a lie

Lilyheart Swain
Please don't give into your pain
You hold my soul on Eden's Edge

Your innocent flesh
Cradled in my broken arms
Forever you will be mine, forever you will stay
The snow caressing us as we tangle in deathly embrace
This darkness fades into amber innocence 
Hatred no longer exists
Forgive me
Come back my only
Euphorianah

The winterwind tears carress me
With whispers, (of) Someone I Once knew
Calming the fears inside
But the pain remains
--hallcunary rains 

Dreams fading with the Enya in your eyes
With the darkness of your hands
The silverfears of the pale moon
Shine on you

Lilyheart swain 
Please don't give into your pain
You hold my soul on Eden's Edge

Your innocent flesh
Cradled in my broken arms
Forever you will be mine, forever you will stay
The snow caressing us as we tangle in deathly embrace
This darkness fades into amber innocence 
Hatred no longer exists
Forgive me
Come back my only
Euphorianah

Your eyes search for mine
Oh how they shine, blue 
Sacrdice has a price
Heaven is calling us tonight

Cursed In shadowed illusions
Shall we dance?
Would there be a chance
Euphorinah 
Forgive me now
I will rip out every nail 
Of your coffin
I don't care if it's God it will offend

Lilyheart Swain
Please don't give into your pain
You hold my soul on Eden's Edge

Your innocent flesh
Cradled in my broken arms
Forever you will be mine, forever you will stay
The snow caressing us as we tangle in deathly embrace
This darkness fades into amber innocence 
Hatred no longer exists
Forgive me
Come back my only
Euphorianah


Details | Ballad | |

The Dream

A giant tree spoke in clicks
A man was hidden, some kind of trick?
A field of grass, at his foot a stick
Then a vision of Red Beard sick…


Details | Ballad | |

Lycanthrope-Lover

Silent pulses of Krileanine’s Pentagram Lure the young men of the hamlet Lönam Oh how she sains them with The Heptagram Curiosity killed the cat And made the Nightbeast Darkly, she commenced the ancient rite Performing in her Sluttish ways She’s preparing for the Full-moon Night Scream! Lycanthrope Lover Her host’s fangs Will pierce every innocent "Submit to my will You carrion ghoul Welcome to my Esoteric Hell" Scream! Lycanthrope Lover Whore of everything unholy You must Fear the Coming Of Muspelheim, Cassandra


Details | Ballad | |

GET IT STRAIGHT

over the years ive been accussed of some things i did not do
just because im capable of it doesnt mean that it is true
seems somehow i brought this on since i was a kid
but ive always stood up and took account of all the things i did
 
yea maybe that sounded like something that i would do 
but you know if it was me i would have stayed to see it thru
im not the type that would up and leave something half-done
i would have to stick around just to see the out-come

perhaps i have done some things that might have brought me shame 
but i would not just bail out and let someone else take the blame
now if i had made a mistake id be the first to admit 
but i refuse to wear those shoes if i know that they dont fit


 so before you set out to go accussing 
 me of this and that 
 make damn sure that you dont go confussing 
 the  fiction with the facts


Details | Ballad | |

The Unknown


Not knowing tears your insides apart. 
nervousness takes over.  
Threatens to overcome you.
Thoughts bounce around in your head. What will it be?
What will it not be?
Threatens to overcome you.
Terror takes a foothold and will not let go.
Threatens to overcome you.
Questions unanswered are questions forgotten.
Threatens to overcome you.
It will be as if you were thrown into the mix of it all.  It will consume you.
Threatens to overcome you.



Details | Ballad | |

Diedre II

Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode I cunnan sense her embrace that felans gelic Tragedy A Heart to hath, slipped beneoðan waw The dark pulse nou beckons us closer How many daegs will this passion bledan way We will beon the ans left to blame Bewarian we hath be-came their prey They say thou hast ben addicted to thy pain A life-leas cold barren soul left to die in the rain A whisper to close to the edge A ceallian fram the dark Bringan ut a saving sparke An exodus fram her pain Her life spent braeð in shame A Shadow ceallian brecans the silence Eom I the an to blame Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deirdre naefre said wrong Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode “My decadence wesan just for thee Though thou never hast cared of what I hath been through Enter the world hwaer empathy is clandestine A world created by thee, just for me Hwaet is lecgan in my heart Is why thou wants to through the stan” I call thy name towards nightfall’s reign But they take thou so feorr way A dark engel so devin Cursed by Eden’s Heart I will avenge every tear An exodus fram her pain Her life spent braeð in shame A Shadow ceallian brecans the silence Eom I the an to blame Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deirdre naefre said wrong Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode


Details | Ballad | |

Crazy

Laugh when you cry
Dance when you mourn
Fight when you make peace
Fly when you can’t jump
Call a fool Solomon
Put on your clothes when you take a shower
Work and never ask for your wages
How about planning to steal from a police station
A monkey and an angel getting married
What about saying thank you to an atm machine after dispensing you cash
Imagine an elephant falling in love
And a bamboo tree dancing
It’s a crazy world
Even mental people rule over countries
A world where the foolish rule over the wise
Isn’t it funny how intelligent people become servants to the supposedly never do wells
Why do good girls love bad boys?
Why do bad things happen to good people?
Some bad people even live longer than good ones
Messy divorces leave you wondering if there was ever love
Crazy when you see a husband beating a wife almost to death 
Again I wonder why getting married
Gosh why bother
Take a stroll
I assure you there is plenty madness everywhere
It’s called the upside down world.


Details | Ballad | |

Wonder Why

Can you understand
pain searing into my skin.
i cannot stand the pain,
but i will follow through.
i think of your face
but do you ever think of me?
do i ever grace the space that
contains your memories?

do you wonder why?
these tears they never dry.
my eyes are burning red and
it feels like i'm on fire.
how can you say that we
were never meant to be?
your heart throws us away
you cease to believe
in me.

Blood flows from my skin
i try but i'll just fall
i cannot speak at all
my heart begins to fail.
i'm missing everything
condesending arguments.
i cannot feel my face
but i shall follow
through.

and do you wonder why?
these tears they never dry
my eyes are burning red
it feels like i'm on fire.
how can you say that
we were never meant to be?
your heart throws us away
it no longer believes in me.

well let our hearts fade
all our mistakes
god the suffering
how much more could we both take?
throw it away
and bury it at sea
it died so long ago
it's time we let it be.
we've broken all the chains that
binded you to me!


Details | Ballad | |

High School Showdown

I came home to Mom's house, 
After being booted out of Dad's, 
And though they called me the Mouse, 
I had grown into a strapping young lad, 

A high school student who never fit in, 
I was a loner and an outcast, 
You could find me outside smoking, 
Trying to defeat my sordid past, 

But once in a while, 
Trouble just came my way, 
There was one unusual rile, 
Let me tell you about that day, 

It started the day before, 
When a gang cut in line, 
And hit my little brother, 
When I stepped up this time, 

They got mad and decided, 
To kick me while I was sitting alone, 
Hit in the back I jumped up and asked, 
Which loser kicked me in the back bone, 

Silence that day was all I got, 
But the next day I found the truth, 
For the guy who kicked me in the lot, 
Was now walking with a cast upon his foot. 

They came at me once again, 
Calling me out to fight the leader, 
And he asked me to fight him, 
Behind the gym and in his fever, 

He wanted to take my life, 
For humbling him at lunchtime, 
They would pull their knives, 
Gang up on me in this fight, 

But I told him no, 
Fight me right here and now, 
Come on let's go, 
Let's have our showdown, 

Right here in front of everyone, 
And his gang started to form behind him, 
And I began to fear as they reached a dozen, 
But I stood there firm and grim, 

Ready to take them all on, 
And suddenly fear crossed their faces, 
Then one by one they were done, 
Leaving his side they left empty places, 

And soon they all left, 
Including my adversary, 
And I was amazed at this gift, 
In the face of a certain beatdown, victory! 

Then as I turned to leave I found, 
The reason the gang ran away that day, 
For behind me stood dozens of kids from town, 
Who were tired of the gang and their evil ways, 

So when you believe you are all alone, 
You may be the one person who, 
Can bring people along, 
When others are acting the fool.


Details | Ballad | |

A Question of Honor

Dedicated to Noor Al-Maleki You Try, You Try so hard To put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views You Have set me Free, Can't You See I Won't have to face a Tyrant anymore Your gaze used to Stun But Now It Just Burns Under the Sun Never Enough to Be Myself Never Enough to Be Free I will not Bow to You I will not Kneel Before You Smothering Liberty Condoning Freedom This way is unjust This way only brings out our worse Hatred and Mistrust War and malice no know law You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views I am The Flame you Greatly Hate I am The Flame you greatly fear Some cannot handle the truth It shows they are the Criminals You are one of them You're the problem This misdeed will not live on without the hate of your name Honor Is not real It's just an emotion that only you feel You're another bulwark Against the truth No one Will Bow No one Will Kneel You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views You Fear The Truth You Fear the reality you are the criminal against all humanity We must end these lies Before Honor Will Strike again You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views


Details | Ballad | |

To give you up

To give up the pain and sorrow 
The tears and lonely sad nights 
The arguments and misunderstandings. 

To have you 
That is the best thing ever 
That is the best feeling of possession there is 
The one thing that makes me smile 24/7. 

I don't want to give you up 
I just want the fights to go 
The misunderstandings to get understood 
The tears to slowly disappear 
The frowns to slowly turn to smiles 
Sad nights to be cuddled in. 

I need you next to me, 
But I don't need your pain and hurt. 

Come back to me, 
Maybe not. 
It seems you don't care.


Details | Ballad | |

Still Love You

My life has been a struggle through despondent 
pain and all
as my worldly issues continue to fall.
But I realize I was not created to break
so I pick my emotional bag of heartache.
I take all the hurtful woe
and buried it away by my inner love to let go.
Hence I find the strength from within
as I raise up my chin.
To become a better woman.
with a new life to begin.
To make it on the top.
not allow my self esteem to drop
I made it through
I know I still have you.
the time we invest


was true love blessed.
Still through our situation
of an unhappy relation.
Our love will never lapse
nor will my experiences of hurt ever relapse.
But unconscious our love will be strong
and our time together will not be right or wrong.
All though life’s troubles continually invade
Our affection for one another will never fizzle or fade
Now it is time to say good-bye.
however, our love will never die.


Details | Ballad | |

The Rumble from Below

They heard the rumble from below
Drinks were spilled; they stopped the show.
The scream was heard, the tension rose
The crowd was still, the music froze.

The lights flickered, a roar was heard
Wild lion appears, then massacred
All the zebras, flailing around
So their stripes were safe and sound

This lion though, was smarter than that
2 weeks he’d been a hungry cat
Such silly follies were no match
To save lives on this grassland patch.


Details | Ballad | |

Josette, Drive the Faerie out of me

She's Lost--I'm the one left to blame Forsaken by my potent manipulating game I've killed the one, My starcrossed heart Desires ...But not By My hands I Try To Follow her ghost But the fog and mist are too strong My eyes are rendered useless "You're Never going to Find Josette" The netherworld Spirits sang I Won't lose Heart I Will Win this Fight For My Sacred Josette's Right to Life This is what happens when The Devil's Adovocate Falls for Jesus's Greatest Bride This is what happens When The life of the disease Loves the cure it desperately hates Drives you mad But Wasn't I already? Josette, I'm begging you To Drive the Faerie out of Me


Details | Ballad | |

When The Omnipotent towards the Earth looks

When The Omnipotent towards the earth looks,
He cannot that despair suppress.
From silver eyes fall the tears
Far greater than King Lear's,
For he cannot believe if by his hand
He, in five days, molded that land
And on the sixth placed in it man,
To lord over both day and night-
The animals and all the earth.
Now, when The Omnipotent towards the earth looks,
He finds Man wielding that darkness against his brother.


Details | Ballad | |

A Smile Summit True

A Smile Summit True

Oh, the young do await the game;
They put off ‘til the morrow,
The weight of dreams to bear;
They blunt the anguish and sorrow,
Now;
Draw near my sullen few;
I’ll whisper in your ear: the neon
Glow, the murmur low calls one
On to chase it; yet such love
Is lame;
A dirty shame;
Our scars will never show it,
Yet,
In heaven they all know it.



Details | Ballad | |

Block

Once again I am stuck in that place
The one where my heart is filled with hurt and hate
I know your Lieing by the look on your face
Only thing to do is have falth

You use me and abuse me year after year
Now i find her number in front of me
I cry but don't let you see the tears
It would not matter you only see what you want to see

You say it was nothing just talking thats all
She dose not mean anything to you anyway
Is that why you only text and not ever call
I do not trust what you say becase you threw my trust away

You say it was all her fault she started it
For nine long months you lied about everything
I do not belive you not one bit
I do not want the pain you bring

So have you fun play your games
I am done with it all
I do not want to hear her name
Just remember the day will come you want my call


Details | Ballad | |

The Fear

So scared of changes
Don't  want  idiots rearranging my life
I've been this way since I was a child
My head is confused my mind makes me feel mentally abused
They say they want to assess me but I'm no fake
Realising my only income and freedom is at stake
Bad thoughts and images run through my brain
Not knowing how things will turn out is driving me insane
My fears are justified I won't have anyone tell me that I've lied 
I don't want this medical examination being prodded and poked
Don't want some doctor laughing at me like I'm some kind of joke
I do not choose to be this way but you are just you they all say
I wished I could see into my future but I know that cannot be
Hoping and praying they will see I'm genuine
Being mentally ill is not a sin 
I'm screaming inside hoping the doctors will understand
Can't take any more of their stupid demands
Please don't make me bend don't make me stand
The fear is on the surface 
The fear is in my heart 
The fear is all around my mind
Please have compassion and be kind
Dreading what may come of me 
Forced back in to work when I am sick forced back in to society
Please see that this is me and that my fears do control me. 


Details | Ballad | |

No happy endings

"It never made me think less
of you, the marks apon your skin
it never made me wanna run when
you told me of the voices that
yelled within. i didn't want to run
away like everyone else did
i never wanted us to break 
but it seemed we just where kids

it's sad to say that i miss you
it's hard to breathe but i struggle
to get through
and how i used to say that i loved you
it's hard to see but sometimes dreams
come true.

we had those special nights where we talked
until the sun rose up. the wind outside was yelling
at us both to fall asleep. but we ignored it
anyways.
it seems like it was just yesterday, even though
we where miles and miles and miles away.
somehow i still felt you.

it's sad to say that i miss you
it's hard to breathe but i struggle
to get through
and how i used to say i loved you
it's hard to see but sometimes dreams 
come true.

how do i live without you here?
missing your body close to mine
how do i stop hurting and stop the tears
coming out my eyes?
have you ever heard me screaming?
at the top of my lungs
i say your name every night
but you never seem to come.
the memories of us. the life we planned
it's fading all away. do you understand!
we both carried a torch inside of us
how did we let it get blown away?

it's sad to say that i miss you
it's hard to breathe but somehow i still
make it through
and now i miss how you loved me too
it's hard to see now but sometimes dreams
really do come true.
it's sad to say that i need you
it's hard to breathe but somehow i still make
it without you
and it's hard to believe but sometimes happy endings
really don't come true..."


Details | Ballad | |

The eyes of the immortal (part 1)

The fever comes upon the mortal
Through it he seeks his mind to see
What lies behind the hidden portal
Behind the scenes of his reality

He sees forces that furiously unravel
Upon the souls of the flesh and blood
They seek the despair, the power, the emotion
To discovery the new in their immortal now

They sense his eyes looking at them
His consciousness swimming in their unknown
They look back, with a desire for pestilence
Troubled as he is, afraid he now becomes

Rotten his reality, begging for the something
To the few that notice .. his futility on the streets
He craves for his status, his power and his money
The things that depraved him of his soul

Yet nobody looks, nobody hears and no one understands
The earth has closed his gates to his mouldered soul
Trapped between the world of vision and the world of now
His mind starts planning his devious return


Details | Ballad | |

Takin' Your Love Away

What do you mean you’re leaving?
	What aren’t you telling me?
		You had said that we could run away and make it out on our own; out in the wild.
			But now you’re packin’ up your things and givin’ me one last kiss good-bye.
				And I say that U can’t leave me.
					How am I supposed to live without you?
				He said I really don’t give a damn what you do.
			Keep the faith and never be afraid to follow your heart.
		I’ve told you time and time again that this love thing is too big for little girls.

										So I say. . .

I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
You cared enough to dry them away,
But now,
That you turned away,
I still don’t know how you did it and 
You’re Takin’ Your Love Away

I picked him up at a bar.
	I didn’t have a care.									
    
  No.
		I was too drunk, so he took me home, in his truck.
	He stayed with me all night long,
Never once questioning. . .
					Never once leavin’ my side.
As I rolled over the next morning
		A note was in his place:
	Call me if you need me, I’ll be back tonight, baby.

										So I said. . .

I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
You cared enough to dry them away,
But now,
You turned to me,
I still don’t know why you did and
I hope that
You’re not Takin’ Your Love Away


          So. . .
		Please don’t leave. . .




So he said. . .


I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
I hope you care enough to accept this ring,
That’s all my heart.
I still know why I do this to you and
I don’t want you ever
Takin’ Your Love Away


I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
You cared enough to dry them away,
But now,
That you turned away,
I still don’t know how you did it and 
You’re Takin’ Your Love Away



I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
You cared enough to dry them away,	
But now,	
You turned to me,	
I still don’t know why you did and	
I hope that		
You’re not Takin’ Your Love Away	

I’m sorry I fell asleep in your arms and cried right in them,
I hope you care enough to accept this ring,
That’s all my heart.
I still know why I do this to you and
I don’t want you ever
Takin’ Your Love Away


If you love me enough. . .
			Then don’t
				Take Your Love Away


Details | Ballad | |

A Grim Abscond

Walking on air. Thirsting for sorrowing despair is the only way I know how to keep you near. My spirit lingers for a moment, searching the softly dead silence for the words to say... forever the words are left unspoken. How can you speak when there is nothing but hungering darkness filling the eeiry quiet? My thoughts are left open in the night beauty filled with a gentle light. You see me; your gown is delicate, innocent and white. I look down at my own garments, clothed in black, I am a rainbow of darkness, mastered only by the forsaken raven... longing to thrive in the precious color of snow. A red rose drips with horrid blood, Why must I leave you now? Why must I go? You slowly reach for my hand, but you just don't understand, my heart is breaking. I don't want to bid thee farewell, but to live in such a dastardly sorrowful place would be like living somewhere else. My heart longs to be with you, and I know that in my dreams you will softly whisper "I love you" in my ear. Little do I know that one day soon it won't be in just a dream, because surely I will be with you here, So beautiful sweetheart of mine, do not dread, do not cry, For it is the words you have stolen from thy mouth "I love you", 'tis the only way I will forever depart. These words quietly unspoken still linger, silently in thy mouth evermore in thy heart... At thou grim abscond shall we forever part. Your frozen hand gingerly touches my cheek, wiping me free of all my tears. Surely, tenderly, I will soon be with thee here, until then, darling I love you. Let us forever dance in the dawn of the light, as my black garments miraculously transform, and turn into pure white. Sweetheart I am with thee here, in the night beauty filled with the glorious light. You have saved me from thy distress, thy sorrowing despair. Forever I will rest with thee, in thy heavens of everlasting light... close to you dear. "I love you" once again repeats its story as we forever slowly rejoice, dancing in victory. The two roses; black and white, silently stop crying, transforming in the light. They find refuge in each other, and live in the peace of hope, love, and looming, spectacular, innocent light. A grim abscond I once sang, as the roses drip in horrid blood, thus they prophecy destined them to be so much more, and now they stand against the beauty of the wind, forever bound together with thy treasured love.


Details | Ballad | |

Disposed By Hate

Darkness sets in on a man. A weak, powerless man. A man trapped in his thoughts. Battling and trying to fight but falling into a constant lose. Trying to seek a light. But there's none in sight. Growing weaker and weaker each day. He's holding onto strings better left to fray. Sitting, thinking, breaking down with his head in his hands. Figuring all this out only to which he understands. Not knowing his fate. He's disposed by hate.

He's a mess, Filled with stress. Cant find a away out. To much to think about. Just a dark, weak minded soul. It's really taking its toll. He's been through so much. That he's effecting to the slightest touch. Its a long way to break free. To think there's a chance and one he must see. But he's not even close to reality. He's trapped in a place that he's always known. There's no way out and the door isnt shown. Struggling not knowing his fate. He's disposed by hate.


Details | Ballad | |

Rosaline

Moonlight shines down on my cold, pale face I am alone, her raven calling, I am disgrace Falling as the willows weep, I hold her in my arms as she struggles to breathe Rosaline, my one love divine. You are sacred You are mine Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline. Happened that Grim reckless day when the shadows began to play Beauty detonated in my trust No more, no more will there ever be a witch so grand, as to bring back my Beloved Rosaline Sorrow cuts it's way into my heart It is the locked key, the one you keep Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline So leaving this Tragic scene I vanished from Rosaline's sight Nevermore will there ever be a witch so grand, as to bring back my Beloved Rosaline Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline. Enchanting she sang to me, in the everlasting light of peace My beautiful siren walks again Goodnight my Beautiful Rosaline


Details | Ballad | |

"MOM"

Roses are all different colors now.
And the violets don't even really know-
that the sugar is not feeling so sweet, anymore.
Cuz' love left nothing behind, just me-
I didn't go...

The colors all think that their hues are all used up-
And all these souls don't know where to go...
Somehow, the sky remains bluish gray up above, 
but lights no path for the lost to roam.
There is no place for them to call home.

No one is waiting. No one cares.
No one is crying because you feel dead.
No one is calling. No one is coming.
No one is crying because you're not there.

Theres nothing to live for,
but your breath comes just the same...
Theres nothing to die for, either-
We live in their f__'ed-up GAME...

Theres no one to love you just because they want to-
No one to be proud for all the real good you do...
No one to kiss your Boo-Boo's all better-
No One. Not Anymore. Not Ever...

And....
No One, (remember?), had to show her the door;
She opened it herself, turned and looked at you for the last time-
knowing that she'd no longer, EVER, be able to look you in the eye...
She couldn't grace you with Good-Bye.
You deserved some acknowledgment, or some reason why...
A reason for all these wasting tears-
The ones I still can't hide...

No explanation for her decision.
She left before you could even ask why(?)
You try to understand why she betrayed your trust.
The only trust, in the one & only mother you ever had...

You lost all FAITH in me, Mom-
And I always held your hand...

Right or Wrong- YOU, I stood beside.
I guess in all these years, I shouldn't of held on so F-N tight...
All the while I thought you were loving me,
You were just taking me for a ride...

I WISH someone would've told me, 
how my part played out, long ago...
Because I could've walked here FASTER-
And I could've done it all ALONE.....


K.C. feb25,2006


Details | Ballad | |

Ballad In A Graveyard

Behold my brother, MDG
Handsome, gifted, crazy
Living his days in drudgery
Thoughts unfocused, hazy

He takes his hat off in the rain
Looks down upon her grave
He sinks to earth in melting pain
Her life he could not save

He loved her then, still loves her now
Helpless as he sits here
She gave to him her lifelong vow
That he should never fear

Her going before him in death
He was the older one
He’d be first to draw the last breath
That promise, now undone

Leaves him lonely to start new life
He does not know how to
Begin afresh without his wife
He struggles to bow to

What he cannot comprehend –
Shorn of his beloved
Filled with a grief that never ends
Life? How can he live it?

Now he feels enraged, quite angry
Nothing’s fair about this!
So he sets out, mean and hungry
To try to make right this

Situation (aberration 
Is more like it he thinks --)
To refuse death’s sad invitation
He shakes his head and blinks

For there, before him, standing tall
A shadow figure waits
From its petrified fingers fall
First closed, then open gates

One portal to the unknown days,
The other, portal past
He shifted back and forth his gaze
Then suddenly, he gasped

Through portal past he saw himself
Lost, grave side, deep in pain
And then that scene resolved itself
In pouring, golden rain

Through the portal of unknown days
He sees her peaceful face
And seeks to trust God’s unknown ways
On earth, in time and space

He decided not to fight it
Or beg his lover back
No need to undo or right it
He saw there was no lack

Her peaceful face shone in his mind
Her spirit touched his soul
His vision cleared, no longer blind
His heart was healed, made whole

The pouring rain lets slowly go
The earth that holds the grave
His mind fills up with Spirit’s glow
He’s clean, reborn and brave

He can now face his life alone
Until his time to die
He knows her soul’s not trapped in stone
She’s always by his side

He’s happy now, with many friends
Who understand his peace
He lost his need to make amends
Their love will never cease


Details | Ballad | |

The Battle Begins

Now sleep I may,
Into the night,
For the spirits and tomatoes
helped set things right.

I know I shouldn’t have,
For my meds don’t allow it,
But is too late now,
Please don’t you try it.

Was something I needed,
The pressure within,
Oh how I wish,
To start over again.

But she will not have it,
I do not fit in.
Her schedule is hectic, 
No time to mend.

I call her up,
No time for me,
She says just give up,
Please leave me be.

How I hate spirits,
How do you people drink this stuff?
But I am not finished,
I haven’t had enough.

For there are things inside me,
We have to get out,
Scratches on my back,
I could live without.

So deep and hurting,
Attacking my heart,
This day has been coming,
It is not a new start.

I knew from the beginning,
That this could not be,
But always an ending,
To set you free.

Now in total darkness,
The lights are so bright,
What will become of me,
On this fateful night.

The black wolf approaches,
I can sense his fear,
He can smell my scratches,
As he comes near.

Death is our battle,
We will fight tonight,
Our hearts will rattle,
To see who is right.

Deeper and deeper,
I am going down,
His blows are a killer
So profound.

He knows where to strike,
To make the best hit,
I try with all my might,
But deeper into the pit.

A loosing battle I fight,
I wanted to win,
But this is not the night,
What a night it has been.

I have a cold and feel terrible. What did you think?


Details | Ballad | |

Intervention



Silence.  No One Speaks
On My Behalf.
The doors shut and I am two......I cover my ears.
I cover my body with clothes.   Louder.  Darkness.
Nowhere
Exists
To
Go

Metal grinding, skin like silk
Hurts me that...
Now.  Why I am I left here?
Slam of the door.  Ouch my ears.  Help me.
Silence.
Tears apart. White hot.
Blinding.
No eyes feel so much.  Green eyes.  Clawing me to the ground and I go spinning.
Blonde curls too hot to handle.

Please don't.  Please don't please.

Why couldn't I just have roses?
Pulled tight...slammed shut.  Upside down now and floating.
Scream
Take Me Away
Dead

I won't, I won't.  I won't go.
Me.  Leave me.
Leave me alone let me shatter.
Cold steel jammed up
gentle newness
Gone forever
After that.
Slammed shut for good


I turn a blind eye to he who did that.



Redemption for me.


Details | Ballad | |

Broke Ballers

Back at age fifteen 
was when I started smoking that green on the reservations poverty's scene 
making dollars like scholars 
shouting Se7en King when I holler but truth remain that we all acting big and rich but we just all broke ballers
 






Details | Ballad | |

Blinded on My Wedding Day

Convince that you are the one for me.

Persuaded that I am the one you need.

Deceived that you desire my love.

Refused to see the truth so I wait.

Believing that your heart is not filled with hate.

I cry for my Heart that I am not confused.

Praying to God that I am not just being used.

Blinded by the, Yes I will marry you!

Consumed by the, Will you marry me?

Walking down the aisle to meet my groom, didn't realize it was the day of my doom! 

Oh! What can I say. Blinded on My wedding Day.


Details | Ballad | |

It Started With...

A kiss
So soft, so familiar.
Even after years,
I can't find any better.
One moment
Back, wrapped in your arms
And still, you're perfect.
My good luck charm.
I say,
"It's weird that you still hold me perfect."
Your reply,
"No one else ever fit."
But you left.
And I can, now, honestly say, "No regrets".
You've made your decisions and lived your life,
Just as I have done with mine.
So why is it now that you come back to me?
Right after I've found some kind of happy,
But still not the same happy you give,
But happy enough to live and let live,
To smile on a daily basis,
That's when you come and do this!
You pick everything up and turn it upside down,
Or maybe you flipped it downside to the sky,
And put the right side up.
Either way you put it, I'm stuck between him and you,
And you ask what I want, 
But honestly, I don't want to give either of you up.


Details | Ballad | |

Savior

 I walked a broken road, Why couldnt I see, Why did I refuse to admit that You were my only Hope; My only Chance of survival? Instead, You were my last resort(option); My last call. I tried everything I knew, I thought I could make it without You, But I was beaten down, bruised, cut open, and torn apart, lost and alone; I needed You. All I had to do was cry out, but something held me back; My pride was so strong. Then I hear Your Voice, Reminding me how much I need Your Help; I needed to give it up, And fall into Your ever-loving Embrace, Because You are the only One who can save me, The One I cant live without, My loving Father.


Details | Ballad | |

Miss Mayhem

Nymphomania Is all she can grant you along with a well spent night This femme fatale isn't something A man can't handle A sex-fiend straight from the chamber of Satan A desire so strong It won't ever feel wrong A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem Disaster is what she is A taste of her could make you leave All other vices and loves Would you ever think of the price For an eternity you'll be condemne dEven just for one night with miss mayhem This vamp of pain all life she will drain, this is addicting whore Is all you will adore Exciting and erotic Using all fetishes against your soul Your wife will surely lament From this dreadful strife A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem A plague of pleasure The flead rats couldn't even measure Against the scourge of men A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem


Details | Ballad | |

Deirdre III

Don't you know Deirdre's Gone? 
Don't you know Deridre's Gone?

I stepped into room 8-16 only to feel tragedy 
The gatekeeper says your addicted to your pain
A lifeless cold barren soul put In the closet with the shades
Will he ever let you out?

How many days will this passion bleed away
We will be the ones to blame
Beware we've became their prey

An exodus from pain
Her life spent breathing in shame
Am I the one to blame 
Don't you know Deirdre's Gone? 
Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong
Don't you know Deirdre's Gone? 

"my decadence was just for you 
Though you have never cared what I've been through
Enter a world where empathy is clandestine
A world created by thee, just for me
The destruction in my mind 
Is why you want to throw the stone
Today I go past the gate''

I call your name towards nightfall's reign
But the guards take you so far away
A dark angel so divine
Cursed by the ones of Eden's Heart
I will avenge every tear

An exodus from her pain
Her life spent breathing in shame
Am I the one to blame 
Don't you know Deirdre's Gone? 
Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong
Don't you know Deirdre's Gone? 



Details | Ballad | |

Vox Populi

I'se  been working my ass all day
in them government agencies in this here hot city	 
and them only giving me this little to pay
for food, rent and give them back the change in my grocery bill and utility.
First, I can't sleep on your job but you sleeping with my money
Using it to fill your belly, while I here contemplating
what making salting and what go be food

giving them prisoners three meals a day 
while I'se in the free, dying for hunger
(poor me!)

Personally,  me thinks dem crusty hand, old niggas
must board old trucks like my granny
tell dem hol' on tight and truck dem offsite 
to work for dem food and a better life
an' dont figet the shackles! Put 'em on three by three
(modern slavery).
 Lest they go free.
Professionally, I kibbain' ma mout'
Make dem bun tax money 
Til dem get let out.
An dis yere darn government-
tolling our country's rusty, old bell-
Off with their heads.
sitting on the high chair we holding up
(if we let go, dem go fall)
tearing out dem dry eyes looking for more than them really deserve
(slackness dis 'ere!)

Might lose my job tomorrow
really, I no care!
cause what is the difference between poor and poor working class?
when all day I'se been  working off my ass
Fi tit-bit more than bus fare!


Details | Ballad | |

Sacred Lorelei

The night has befallen me Rescue me, unchain me Sacred Lorelei Bleeding a passion of royalty Forever I'll follow your Argentine cloak with the most deadly pacts beautiful Witch Sacred Lorelei Tell me did the ravens Hear my cry My misery's plea Sacred Lorelei Was this all just upon a dream Lucidity becoming reality of my Sacred Lorelei A fiat of darkly desire from a most beautiful witch unchaining the burden of my misery All for my Sacred Lorelei


Details | Ballad | |

Jatlo Jatla

      Jatlo Jatla 					
				

'Jatlo jatla is my name
 I shall seek no comfort that came
life had made no good for me
 I am like a camel on the sea'

'Look my kids are gone beyond
 one by sickle and the other in pond
the next day she joined in London
 leaving me in the dawn to mourn'

 'Rose ran away to Region 
 With a Wally and my wagon
My money! Millions are gone
 O maker what will make it come'

‘My castle burn to ashes 
  I am rich with no more riches
I slept in the field all day 
 On thorns and termites were I lay’

'On clothes I had more but one
 Food I gave now a grain of corn 
Friend left me with hugs and kisses
 O maker what will make me please'

'I aim to end my lone life
  The sword was blunt and the knife,
It gave me more than hell’s pain
 Death did not come one my plane'
 
'Who am I to have a name 
 I shall seek no comfort that came 
Life had made no good for me
 i am like camel on the sea"
                                                                                                                                                    
                                                                                                                                                    
                                                                                                                                                    
                                                                  
Imitation of this poem will not                                                                                          
be allowed. All rights reserved.
Kidtirangleinc. kidtirangle@yahoo.co.uk


Details | Ballad | |

Can't You

Can't you understand?
i don't wanna be broken
anymore.
i wanna feel whole
again, in control
again. my eyes have
seen the worse, i'm feelin
like i'm cursed.
can i be whole again?
in control again?

I'm bleeding out from
the cuts you gave.
they'll be the death of me
on your path of hate.
don't touch me now
i'm outta range
there's no way out
lost my escape.

can't you understand?
i'm lost again.
my body is failing and
my chest begins to
hurt
god can it get much
worse?
losing control again
never to be whole
again!

i'm bleeding out from
the cuts you gave.
they'll be the death of me
on your path of hate.
don't touch me now
i'm outta range
there's no way out
lost my escape.
don't touch me now....
i'm outta range!


Details | Ballad | |

Most High

Most High,
Reigning in the sky,
Thats how he sees the Sovereign Lord..
 
It begins with a man,
A young man,
Walked with God when he was young,
Didn't know wrong from right,
Left the Lord out of his sight,
Was a troubled kid in his school,
His school life was sent in a whirlpool,
Failed a yr and worked really hard,
He passed got dealt two good cards,
But God dealt him a hand that would change his life forever..

A terrible accident had happened,
Lucky to have survived,
Lying face down,
He cant feel from the neck down,
Taste of blood in his mouth,
He blacks out,
Wakes up being helped on a stretcher,
He was put into a helicopter,
He blacks out again,
Wakes up in his room,
Not knowing whether he can walk again,
He cries out to a nurse,
"Will i walk again?",
She says "Your very lucky dear boy,
And there was no permanent damage, 
It will take time,
But you should be walking in no time.",
He smiles,
Tried to pick up he cup made of styrofoam,
But he cant,
He finds out his wrist was broken in two places,
And will heal on its own,
He notices a long scar on his knee,
He was told he did permanent nerve damage,
And wont be able to feel anything on it or around it,
In what felt like a long time,
He made a complete recovery,
Grew stronger with his legs,
Goes back to school,
A day after his birthday,
And thats when the nightmare began.. 

Then one day,
His parents saved him with their kind words,
His eyes were opened,
He saw everything clearer and brighter,
He accepted God's word,
Hes grown stronger through Christ,
He was redeemed by his Savior,
God's unfailing love truly means the world to him,
His walk with God have been a journey he can not explain,
But the smile on his face says it all,
He walks stronger and stands tall,
For he put his trust in God,
The Sovereign Lord..
 
Most High,
Reigning in the sky,
Thats how he sees the Sovereign Lord.


Details | Ballad | |

Thugs, Thieves, and Cut Throats

One thing is for sure here in these places
That demons are abundant with childlike faces

Assassins lurk about unyielding to their task
Though they bare no threat or mask

Passersby wont even blink when they see
That children are deadly to you and me

For shelter and bread are motives enough to kill
Emotionless beast without passion or thrill

Society made such creatures who seek refuge
Among the darker demons who’s lives are abuse

Rat infested accommodations are what WE provide
Mediocre medical care dooms there already damaged pride

So to the streets many run away too!
Some clever enough to grasp the truth

Bands of hooligans are what the uppers call there hoards 
Beatings and sickness are what they can only afford

Survival becomes priority number one in life
Normal relationships never manifested only strife

Councilors, priest, and the police bring them back to hell
Trapped in the Orphanage is like being in a cell.

On sale to highest bidder is slavery plain to all
Or maybe like puppies you pick up at the mall

Some of the lucky ones find legitimate foster care
Others return with bruises and more nightmares

Money is a primary factor to these so called foster adults
People who can’t take care of themselves much less other souls

So I say to those who are in search of another income search elsewhere
Leave it to those who truly, truly care!

Back to those on the streets come to a place 
Where a smile can return to your dirty face

SCHOOL!


Details | Ballad | |

Wasn't Enough

Why bother trying, You watch yourself dying, Crying out to God asking for advice, Help me find away to rejoice, Speak up and feel the noise, Only in away that He knows, And you cant explain, To Save you and take away the pain, You open your eyes and see the world is spinning, Trying to figure when am I gonna start winning, Sitting in a corner and your losing, Thinking why am I on this path that I'm choosing, You make one last cry for help?, But no ones around to answer......
 
Demons surround you, Nowhere to run, You look to the ground and you pick up that gun, Raise it to your head, But you can't pull the trigger, You place it out in front and start to fire, Thinking the bullets wont hit them and you don't believe they will only to call God a liar, Seeking away out, Time running short you scream and shout, Demons closing in stronger and awaiting a final attack, You stand your ground and try to fight back, But like a diamond in the rough, It Wasn't Enough......
 
Struggling to find peace within, You ask God to forgive you of your sins, Only to figure out its you, you can't forgive, Tension rises once again, You wonder is this the end? Fighting to survive with all your might, Suddenly day turns to night, Demons coming upon you, Your mind in fear you dont know what to do, You seek out a voice, Your ears filled with noise, Your eyes pin out Demons in all directions, Inching and inching ever so closely, You make one last cry for help, But no ones around to answer......
 
Once again the Demons surround you making escape a mere impossibility, You fall to your knee's and pray, Talking to God saying all you can say, You open your eyes and see a blinding light, Thus its the hand of God giving you the strength to stand up and fight, A war that lasted nearly a decade is coming to a close as it seems, But your still in question with those nightmarish dreams, The dreams bring you down but you try to stay tough, In the end, It Wasn't Enough......


Details | Ballad | |

Feelings abroad

The thought of me losing 
makes me so depressed 
Especially when I think that I'll be 
the reason you left 
All this guilt in me won't take
any of the stress to less
And the things I do to you
dosen't give me much help
I know it bothers you inside  
those times u hold back the tears
I know all the stuff I put you through 
these past 5 years
I'm poisoned with confusion 
u are the one to produce a cure
I appreciate that I Love You 
plus I am tring to keep u from leaving me
My love 4 u grows more more more..........


Details | Ballad | |

Morbid Irony

While I lay here
Staring my fate
Square into obscurity
Left with nothing but promises
Of forgotten grandeur

Leaving behind epic depths
Of visions
Illusions
Confusions, beyond credibility

A string of events one could not forsee
Refusal to uphold unrealistic
And idealistic states of abstraction

Thus bringing us lucid and coherent
Understandings of the truth
Perhaps revealing consummate contentment
No more resentments
Of past discontentment
These vast extents of torments
Preventing  one from ascending
Into unending bliss
Where the unmerciful bind you
Overextending
Subdued


Details | Ballad | |

Litany of Decay

Her black eyes allure you
Into her cloak if traps 
Nothing is right anymore 
Death encircles you but 
Never finds you

They Want my curse of eternal 
life 
But all I want to do is reach 
for the knife
In blood you rose
In blood I fall

 forever I must sing this litany
dying in life-- let my find my 
grave
'twas the myriad year
inducing a lucid fear
 I can hear my coffin's cry
 my body lies
there's nothing left to say
This Litany of decay

Free me, hear me, my death 
where have you gone
I Drown in Vitality
Dying in my immortality 
Just waiting for the stake to 
reach my heart
Caress me with your pain
like the blood in rain

Your shell is breaking
Show them what lies inside
Witch of centuries
Witch of lies
Love was never meant for you

forever I must sing this litany
dying in life-- let my find my 
grave
'twas the myriad year
inducing a lucid fear
 I can hear my coffin's cry
 my body lies
there's nothing left to say
This Litany of decay

forever I must sing this litany
dying in life-- let my find my 
grave
'twas the myriad year
inducing a lucid fear
 I can hear my coffin's cry
 my body lies
there's nothing left to say
This Litany of decay


Details | Ballad | |

Still

So frustrated
Bitter and hurt 
Searching for answers
The key to make it work
With every little beat
My heart breaks even more
With every uncertain breath
I grow even more unsure
You loved me once
I'd swear it was so
Your love for me now gone
Lost somewhere along the road
Can we find our way back
Has the feeling gone for good
Dont' you know I'd change things
If only I thought I could
You're so very distant
Almost never, do we touch
You know, I can't remember ever
Wanting anyone quite so much
Can we turn back time
Rewind the clock, so to speak
Bring back all those feelings
You once felt for me
My soul, so very shattered
Battered, beaten and worn
A bruised and broken heart
Dying, lying, scattered and torn
Aching to the core
Yearning to the bone
Shamelessly mourning
The loss of what once was known
Why is our laughter
Replaced by bitter tears
This love, once so amazing
Then brought down with hidden fears
Forever hoping with the dawn
Your heart will, again, be mine
Praying to wake from this nightmare
To find our 'once upon a time'
Do you feel the pain
As it echoes off these walls
Do you ache with longing
Or feel nothing for me at all
Is this just my imagination
Conjuring fears that need not be,
Is it just too much to hope for
That you still be in love with me
No answers to these questions 
So unsure of how you feel
Yet with all these uncertainies
I'm certain I love you still


Details | Ballad | |

I'm The Forgotten

This is where I thought you would be
This is where I knew I was wrong
My heart could not bear the pain
When I knew I was just a shadow all along

You held secrets I thought I could know
You gave me trust I thought I had
Now, my heart burns with so much sorrow
Could anything get worse than that?

I am the forgotten in your world
I was waiting for someone to let me rise
I am nothing but the air around you
I am broken and my visions became blind

I am lost in between
The forgotten world I have been
This heart that is breaking
It won't stop till I become unseen

Because I am the forgotten




Details | Ballad | |

Invisible

Being invisble
Like I was not there at all

Being unnoticed
Like there is a chance I could fall

Being too far away
Like I have forgoteen how you smiled

Being alone
Like the world is nothing in my life

Because I was invisble to you
Because I could not be seen
Because I haven't seen you
Because we forgotten everything

Being invisible
Like there's nothing but air

Being hollow
Like being erased undeclared

Being the Only One
Like the world is not fair

Being so Curious
Like I wanted to know what's not there

As I passed through dimensions of time
As i walked the earth with my own two feet
My world became so dark without the light
Everything just come and flow like a passing wind

Being Invisible
And that's what am I now..

I am invisible
I am unable to come around

Because you can never see me now


Details | Ballad | |

A FORBIDDEN THOUGHT

Unconvincing words
is what I hear...
and need, not want
keeps bursting out
of your pathetic thoughts;
all is gone so sore!

A fobidden thought,
not spoken for your own sake,
what you hide is plain and clear;
when that voice starts shaking,
and those eyes start rolling:
I lose faith in everything you say,
look at me, and be as true as yesterday!
Have I ever kept a secret, or been insincere?
Sympathy wouldn't be in me today,
unless you revealed that forbidden thought!

Secrets can cause doubts,
enought to destroy trust and confidence;
are you still hanging on pretense?
Go beyond the storm and foresee
things that can't  ever been seen;
put it all to rest ...it's your last chance!    

A forbidden thought 
locked inside so shamefully
is another reason to fear truth;
being so untrue and silent
doesn't make easier for me
to forgive you like I would like toI 
A forbidden thought
lingering on unspoken lips
makes me sad and wonder why
it seems hard to face
the consequence of a lie...
when all you have to do is apologize!

A forbdden thought so unspoken,
never sheds light on anything too foregone;
something lost to time that only  love can
bring back from its deep darkness!
A forbidden thought follows a gloomy dawn,
afraid that the silence will find a voice!




Details | Ballad | |

Sir Lancelot and the four Knights

Lancelot left his friend sir kay snoring
Took his garment and he wore
He rode into the woods singing
He saw a glade and the quartet as they swore

The quartet,loitering in power thought it was sir kay

Sir Sagramour charged at lancelot, they clashed
Lancelot stood and was down in disgust
Ector carelessly proceeded to him, but was slashed
The third,Sir Uwaine panicked, he looked in distrust

with the failure of othershe was encourage to play

He moved, lancelot knew him well he fell like an eagle
Finally Sir Gawaine clashed with lancelot Gawaine's spear melted
His horse reversed upside down and he fell into the jungle
The four Sirs condoled them selves until they discovered.

It was lancelot not Sir Kay, the knight full of sorrow couldn't rise up from the clay


Details | Ballad | |

Tainted Innocence

Sly smile greets me as eyes feast upon my skin
Undress he silently pleads
Unwanted hands touch thy naked leg
An innocent mind is slowly being tainted
Fornication is written all over his unholy mind
A cringe brings forth a sparkle in his eye
Confusion clouds her vulnerable mind 
Her skin is creaming against his filthy touch
Sinful hands travel up her thighs 
Run! Yell! persists her mind
Unwanted fingers caress her virgin parts
Shock claims her body
Her brain urges her body to leave yet it ignores 
Rough, twitching fingers caress her sensible zone
Tears are clouding her vision
Her body intents to flee but he blocks her way
Desire is clearly shown below his waist
Terror seizes hr body
Shot down the bed, he rips her shirt open
She's only eleven
Anxious, greedy fingers pull against her skirt
Punches are thrown at her attacker
He only responds by hitting her close to unconsciousness
Violent hands take off her panties
She's trying to weakly fight him off
Hands explore her vulnerable body
Sobs escape her wet lips
He pulls down his pants
She desperately screams for help
Mocking her to continue yelling, everyone is gone
She see s him pull down his boxers
Lust controls his sick mind
Rough hands touch her virginity
He becomes erect
She's struggles when he grabs her hand
He only strikes her senseless
Placing her little hand on his erection, gently stroking it
Fear clouds her sense
A perverted smile greets her horror glazed eyes
'Open your mouth'
Terror forces her brain to do as he commands
He shifts towards her placing his erection inside
'Suck it'
Disgust fill her senses
'Suck it!' he yells, hitting her already bruised face
Wincing, she does as she is told fearing for her life
Pleasure creeps up to his face as he loudly moaned
She bursts into tears
He takes himself out
Pinning her down, he puts himself upon her entrance
Evading all privacy She screams in agony as he roughly takes all her innocence
Tears flow relentlessly down her face
He disengages from her
'You're parents will pick you up in a week' he smirks
Doom fills her
He leaves her alone
And to think that she considered him the greatest uncle ever


Details | Ballad | |

Silent Thoughts Out Loud

Don't step to me,
Talking about, "Baby please,
Just help me get out of this mess."
Because I stood by your side,
Paid my dues for that ride.
I walked away and I said my goodbyes,
But you're trying to pull me in
With all of your "Remember when"'s,
But then,
She walks into the room,
When she asks who it is,
You say, "Just Mike. That's it."
And on the other end of the phone, I sigh
Knowing that you will never change,
Because to you, it's just a game,
Not knowing that you're the one getting played
By her and her sneaky ways,
And all she has to say
Is, "Baby wait!
Don't leave me! I need you."
And just like that, you're sucked back in,
And here I sit on the other end,
Listening to you and her again,
And all I can think is, "Remember when
You finally told me her name
As I sat on top of my car ashamed
That I could allow myself to fall so deep
For someone who had already hurt me.
Remember when you first found out
That she was pregnant and it was yours no doubt.
But you said you still wanted me.
You wanted me to be your child's step mommy.
Remember when you wiped the tears from my eyes
When I was upset because my G-ma died.
I felt like nothing in my life would go right.
Remember when we broke up for a week,
Because of the first time you cheated on me.
Remember when we snuck you home in the middle of the night,
And sleeping in your arms felt so right.
Remember when you put yourself between me and that guy,
When you stood by me as the cars drove by.
Remember when I laid down in the street
And you got so worried about me,
Or walking back to your house and 'Good morning!'
Remember when we sat in the courthouse side by side,
Trying our hardest to find
The nicest way for you to say goodbye
To the girl you're with now and refuse to say
The word 'goodbye' and walk away
Like we talked about that day.
So now you're living two lives at one time,
Playing your games with my innocent mind,
And yet, I'm still here by your side.
Remember when I finally took by my life
And told you and your lies 'Goodbye'.
Oh, wait, that hasn't happened."
When you said, "What?" I snapped out of it.
All of the "Remember when"'s
Were supposed to be only in my head,
But the shock in your voice let me know it came out,
And all of my silent thoughts were said out loud,
And before I knew what to do,
I hear you say, "It was real. I loved you.
I always have and I always will.
The fact that you doubt it is unreal."
Faintly, in the background I hear her say, "What?
Tell me, please, what you're talking about."


Details | Ballad | |

Dear night

Dear night, 
Oh sweet light,
why do you guys fight?
Twlight,sweet night,
why do you guys not like the light?
Is it because your twilight and I am the light,
But for sure I do hate the night.
Forever now we will fight for our rights.


Details | Ballad | |

What's This All About?

Buildings crumble down much like castles made of sand.
The circle is unbroken, the brotherhood of man.
Flames burst out, they seem suspended in the sky.
They can’t stop the terror, no matter what they try.
Then comes a calm, like after a storm.
The people feel the sorrow, as they begin to mourn.
Although I wish that things, could be like before,
As the flames are extinguished, their beings are no more.
Step to the ledge, poised to make that jump.
Jolted from the path, it’s a pretty big bump.
A cloud of destruction shrouds the way back to the path.
I try to add up the numbers but can't do the math.
Smoke so thick, you can cut it with a knife.
It becomes much like a plague, as it takes another life.
The sun returns, but things don't look the same.
Sometimes I wonder, are we getting better at this game?
Darkness returns, with silence by it's side.
You're tossed and turned about, it’s a pretty rough ride.
You try to find your way but it gets lost in your head.
It's seeming to get harder, to just get out of bed.
So you stop and look around but you can see that you are lost.
The autumn leaves start falling, as they float down towards the frost.
Coldness starts to grow, you need only to feel warm.
Try to find shelter, to get out of the storm.
I can see the winter up ahead, trying to get out.
Then I'm left here thinking, what this all about? 


Details | Ballad | |

If I Die

If I died today, remember me forever,
and how I chased dreams, and seemed to quit...never.
Would you look at my picture
Then say I resemble my dad?
Maybe right before I passed
He was the motivation I had.
If I died today, remember me through song,
and how my shows started energized and ended strong.
Would you play my music
Then tell another friend
That I tried day and night
but died in the end.
If I died tomorrow, would you say "I love you" today?
Would you kneel beside my soul and to our savior pray.
Would you share your past with me
and put your plans aside?
I'll pass and take your stories to heaven
to be shared with the Most High.
If I died right now would you please tell my mom?
Tell her I tried my best to succeed and just hold on.
She'll cry herself to sleep, 
and all night dream of me,
but she'll know at heart
that my mission is complete.


Details | Ballad | |

The Premonition

a heart ache i felt
before the start of the day
a premonition i felt
what is it, i could not say

turns out it came true
turns out almost everything went wrong.

my results turned upside down
all my best reputations are gone

my chance to earn some money is not allowed
it was not a chance for me to earn

because i did nothing in the end
because every blessing will go away with a burn

it is sad that the premonition was confusing
it was sad that i could not see what it was supposed to be

it was too bad that the reality happened unexpectedly
until it happened, the event is what i will see

the premonition was unexpected,
i was only able to feel


Details | Ballad | |

Leagues of Shadow

I woke up in the darkness of early morning
With a feeling inside me I cannot explain
All I do know for certain is
It is causing me a lot of pain

It is like a dark cloud is flying over me
In a way I do not know
But what I do know for sure is
It is like some kind of shadow is

Taking complete control of me
I really cannot explain why
But I have this very strange and horrible feeling
That all my good feelings and thoughts are about to die

And turn me into some kind of monster
That I have never really wanted to be
This strange and awkward feeling is
About near to take over me

I am not really sure
But one question: does anyone really know?
Of how much longer it takes for a person?
Until he or she is engulfed into leagues of shadow


Details | Ballad | |

My Reflection

While gazing into the mirror

At this woman that I see

I wonder what she is thinking

As she gazes back at me

Her face is so familiar

That one could almost say

She and I are both the same

Yet different in some way

I see it there within her eyes

They speak without a sound

Telling of a life she has lived

A happiness not yet found

She has accepted her life decisions
 
With each she has learned to cope

Realizing now the sadness

It becomes a spark of hope

Chasing away the darkness

Lighting a new direction

I see a tear fall down our cheek

As I smile back at my reflection


Details | Ballad | |

Low Man Is Due

A low man is due...
My eyes seek reality,
My fingers feel for faith.
Touch clean with a dirty hand,
I touch the clean to the waste.
I fall cause I let go,
The net below has rot away.
And I cry to the alleyway,
Confess all to the rain.
But I lie straight to the mirror,
The one I've broken to match my face.
The fire is so warm,
But nowhere safe from the storm.
And I can't bear to see,
What I've let me be.
So wicked and worn.
So as I write to you,
Of what is done and to do.
Maybe you'll understand,
I won't cry for this man.
Cause low man is due.
So low the sky is all I see,
All I want from you is forgive me.
My eyes seek reality,
And my fingers seek my veins.
There's a dog at your back step,
He must come in from the rain.
But you bring that poor dog in from the rain,
Though he just wants right back out again.
So my fingers feel for faith,
And my eyes seek reality.
So as I write to you,
Of what is done and to do.
Maybe you'll understand,
I won't cry for this man.
Cause low man is due.


Details | Ballad | |

To Roses

A scarlet tear drips o'er the thorn,
As she runs her stained fingernails along the edge.
The blade digs a little deeper:
Beautiful like her lips that speak so silently;
In the irony of a moment, she fades.

As a summer rosebud in blossom penetrates;
The starlit sunlight's gasp against twilight's chill;
A sharp cold turns to the flu.
Dances of fever and anger o'er the horizon:
Blood splatters across the sky.

After the battle of her dreamy cowboys against bison;
She stares up in wonder at this moment.
As she continues to caress the blade;
That lovely rosebud cuts a little deeper into the flesh.
She blesses the curse of roses.


Details | Ballad | |

Mind's Lacuna

Open space within an embrace
My trials are almost done
Executioner tales I failed
While the rest I don't recall
 
Poetry became a backbone
Each time my eye struck twelve
A masterpiece I strive for
But humbly feel I've failed
 
A pen stroke feeds into my shadow
As memory's are still returned
From a cracked skull to my knife's old home
My fingers and wrist still motion
Moving slowly in a off form of cursive
 
Trying again and again into ageless times
To compose a mockery of rhymes
Simply stating what my mind tells me I've beheld
A memoir of a death-less writer
 
While I write I forget
To read or hear
What my hands have written
Or my heart has feared
 
Tis a trial of errors
I can hardly come to believe
That while victory instilled fear
My poetry brought motion
Gave a sense to my background
Something to which, I had no notion
 
Short but sweet I try to achieve
But my execution is always due
As I cannot fail to meet
The standards I feel true
 
I pushed so high to exceed
But can't help to decide
Enough's enough, my mind says
Because within the gap of my head
A small serenity raised true
 
As I put pen to paper
My eyesight tracked down
To begin to read as I write
It beckoned a small shout
 
My poetry I can’t read
But only write 
As my head cannot conceive
What mysteries are contained within
The gap that has completed my mind


Details | Ballad | |

Double Vision

I see another without a mirror...

Both the same that is clear...

How can it be ???

Curly locks and same eyes I see...

Tall yet both matched in size...

Is it real or lies ???

The time on earth the same...

Identity stops there, is it a game ???

Genes split away...

Twins today !
                                         For My Twin  by Perri R. Voge


Details | Ballad | |

Nothing To Find

Torn apart the dreams turn to tears, Going back to anger are the only fears. Trying to find a safe place to hide, The only thing is hate and guilt to the side. Nowhere to ease the mind, Nothing to find. 

True values of pain, Like a cowardly leader in battle to be slain. Rise to fall, There's no feeling to feel at all. Torn apart the dreams turn to tears, Going back to anger are the only fears. Trying to find a safe place to hide, The only thing is hate and guilt to the side. Nowhere to ease the mind, Nothing to find.


Details | Ballad | |

Unstable

Damage is done 
Blames all your own 
I lived for you only 
not that you cared 
not that you knew 

Like a smile from an angel 
Looking right through me 
What I’d give for your notice 
just a catch of your eye 

Hours turn to days, as minutes tick by 
Still you’re looking, looking right through 
All that I am is meant just for you 
How is it you cannot see me 
I’m right here, right in front of you 

It’s killing me 
But its killing you too 

Damage is done 
Blames all your own 
I lived for you only 
not that you cared 
not that you knew 

Hallowed out, I refuse to die alone 
Even the emptiness is gone 
Left on the edge 
just waiting for a push 

Running out of patience 
Breath comes heavy 
Still there is nothing 
Again you look right though me 
Why can’t you see 

It’s killing me 
But it’s killing you too 

Damage is done 
Blames all your own 
I lived for you only 
Not that you cared 
Not that you knew 

Can’t go on like this no longer 
Just existing in shadow 
Don’t walk through me again 
Don’t, don’t you dare 

Bun halo, burn 
I’m taking you down 
All we could have been 
You just wouldn’t see 
All the love for you, living in me 

Damage is done 
Blames all your own 
I lived for you only 
Not that you cared 
Not that you knew 



Details | Ballad | |

The Clouds of the Sky.

the clouds of the sky are extremely wonderful and great, but I really enjoy the 
extremeities of the huricanes through the news and cnn I really wanted to say a 
pray for them.  I hope and pray that we have a government so good.  I watched 
the honor of it all.  Katrina was a wreck.


Details | Ballad | |

Fight The Mere Fight

So it begins, A man falls into his reckless sins.
Believes in God, Talks to him everyday.
Little does he know, The pain is sure grow.
Acts of guilt, sorrow and self retreat brings him crumbling down.
God is more than what others think of to him.
He's Almighty, Glorious, Powerful, Freind, Creator, Lord, and Father above all.
Thus he learns everyday what he reads in the Bible to which he takes in at heart, He breaks into tears wanting a new start.
God and his friends are the only ones he can talk to, No one else seems to understand thus making talking about what he wants too to them very difficult. He doesnt know what to do.
With little time and so much weight on his shoulders its hard to see a brighter side, Before he knows it he will lose his pride.
So much negativity is surrounding him where he calls home, He talks to God explains what is going on and awaits a message.
A message so clear only he could hear, Though some cannot stand to wittness any longer.
Repenting God is something he cannot do, He wouldn't stay true.
Hes in a never ending battle with himself on giving up and fighting the mere fight growing stronger under God.
But its a tough battle.
He doubts himself.
Making a stand from living or dying is one he may never break free,
But he knows he's not alone and he suddenly can see.
The burning passion of a light,
WIth it he learns to fight the mere fight.


Details | Ballad | |

Why

Ive tryed to learn 
Ive tryed to fly
all you seem to want
is for me to cry
Tryed to run
tryed to hide
you love my pain
youll love when I die
I said I would follow you to the end of time
but if you dont step up this heart well stay mine.
I wake every moring to only pain
my life is unliveable 
why wont this change
I dont want heaven
nore live in hell
just remove this life
form this cell
stop my time
stop my pain 
noone knows
to them is all the same
But I have to wake every day to other peoples happiness
so fuk your games 
Ill die alone if thats the only way
what can i do. 
when my little sister curses you.
Maybe shes right!


Details | Ballad | |

I Try

I try to be the one you can trust,
But I dont know how.
All I can do is hide.

The knife I hold in my hand,
The blade shines off the light.
The blood pours from this wound.
The wound that went so ever deep.

I fight all of these wars. 
But the battle has yet to be won. 
Won on the inside.

The life i hold in my hands
no one can save me from this fate 
I have placed upon me.


Details | Ballad | |

An Angry Exchange

Close my eyes, think of the times
Sick of hearing all the lines, fake and smile
and all the while, you talk about me behind
my back, fade to black and turn to blue
from everything that you do.
And it feels like i finally am going
to crack.

I don't want an understanding
Just don't want to be misunderstood
Everything just so demanding
Makes me wanna give it up for good.
Don't want to come to an understanding
Sick of being so misunderstood
All of this is so demanding
It's just gonna break me down for good.

Of all the past, it comes and goes
and little did you know im slowly
fading.
All your words begin to hurt, and bad feelings
beging to lurk, everything your doing  is
grating, inside of my head.
Feeling broken, seeing death
asking if there's anything left
just don't know how to go back
im sick and tired of seeing red.

I don't want an understanding
Just don't want to be misunderstood
Everything just so demanding
Makes me wanna give it up for good.
Don't want to come to an understanding
Sick of being so misunderstood
All of this is so demanding
It's just gonna break me down for good.

Break me down, bleeding on the pavement now
Smile as i look into your eyes, stab me in the heart
you know i can take it,
As the clouds darken my skies
know it's so hard for you to fake it
listening to all your lies
take my dignity and break it
As the clouds rip open my skies.


Details | Ballad | |

Urban Wild West

Back in high school everything was a mess
kids in different cliques, in all types of dress
and everyday a fight to see who's the best
and gun threats with kids having gats in there vests.
Teachers not caring about the education of generation x
didn't believe in the future or us or what's coming next
just in it long enough so they can cash there checks
as they push the kids along, uneducated or not along with the rest.
Security guards check your i.d. to make sure you were where your
supposed to be
But now isn't it so easy to make a fake pass, doesn't anyone see?
so now kids are laying in pools of blood and agony
they say it's safe but schools still very uneasy.

School today's like the wild west
Everyone's fighting, lots of unrest
And every body's just trying to fit in
But some are lost right from the beginning.
School today's like the wild wild west
Everyone's wearing a bullet proof vest
Scared to go to school because of the threats
Afraid as hell as to what happens next.

There's no smiles as you pass by in the hallway
because one false move can make the wrong person angry
everyone seems to be dealing with there own hate
nobody wants to deal with a lonely fate
so much on everyone's plate
and the angst just unable to escape
so when he or she snaps and is in bad shape
everyone runs for cover before it's to late.
Im not out to scare you far from it
but it's time other take notice of it
before more innocent kids die from this
because a child who cries for help gets none of it
a tiny scream inside, the anger that they hide
they always answer with a pistol by there side
and it's up to us to find another way
so those kids who go to school can live another day.

School today's like the wild west
Everyone's fighting, lots of unrest
And every body's just trying to fit in
But some are lost right from the beginning.
School today's like the wild wild west
Everyone's wearing a bullet proof vest
Scared to go to school because of the threats
Afraid as hell as to what happens next.


Details | Ballad | |

Luciferia I-- Cease To Exist

I sense something in her eyes that feels like tragedy She closed her heart but its dark pulse Wilts and stetchs against the wanes How many days will the passion bleed Till it subsides into the new pain We are the ones who will face the blame ''Don't you see what's infront of me, I have to face it all I know there's something wrong help is what I want but it's not what I find You're all filled with troubling lies and incoherent minds Cant you see you're strangling me with every last word There's something you don't know Lying in my heart is why you want to throw the stone'' Her raven eyes fill the silence Luciferia we cease to exist it's burning away-- all others' reliance Luciferia we cease to exist my darkly darling don't fade away Luciferia we cease to exist beware we've became their prey Luciferia we cease to exist


Details | Ballad | |

Little Girl

I have a reason, for what I do.

But it would not, make sense to you.

I love the children, oh too much.

Just so much, I want to touch.

With candy and sweets, I lure them in.

And then the fun, really begins.

I'm not sex-minded, not today.

I would never touch them, in that way.

Some call me evil, some say I'm insane.

I do have a reason, I just can't explain.

You see the kids, are nothing more to me.

Than tiny bodies, with parts I need.

I lost something of mine, I want it back.

My only girl, had a heart attack.

I tried to save her, but I was too late.

I locked myself up, furious with hate.

I stayed there for weeks, writhing in pain.

Until I realized her death, was not in vain.

I figured out, I could change fate!

The tables have turned, I was not too late!

I could remake her, only better!

This way I would never forget her!

With an eye from Tanya, an arm from Sue.

I realized what I had to do.

On the night of revival, all parts were in place.

I'll never forget, the look on her face.

There she lay, on the beach of Lake Pearl.

Beautiful as hell, daddy's little girl.


Details | Ballad | |

My Big Day

Silence all around me as i walked into the room,
everyone is suppose to be excited iam the new bride of the groom.
Don't give me that look like you feel bad for me,
wats going on where is my husband to be?
Shaking and trembling with thoughts in my head,
if he called off this wedding he is going to wish he was dead.
Has anyone called him to see wats going on?
it's bad luck for me to see him so i refuse to call his phone.
Calm down please! replied mother before you ruin the make up no your face,
Iam going to get married right now i shouted 
today here in this place.
And just like a dream the telephone ring...
hello !hello!  i heard him say with the sound of static,
tell my wife we will get married today i was stuck in traffic.


Details | Ballad | |

To Let Love Flourish

Loathing in a sea of sorrow
for that of which is beyond vast
Thinking about the time going bye
Went off the griping tracks

Why must this rule my life
Engraved in stone so it stands
Then I realize that this thickness
is as small as a grain of sand

So back and forth I feel it bounce
Love, Sorrow, in and out
One always more sincere than the other
To let the pain go and watch Love sprout


Details | Ballad | |

When I

When i fall
don't you worry about me
ive been that way before
as the scars aren't hard to see.
And if i break
im sure you'll be there too
at the end of this long road
im sure there's nothing left to do.

When i hurt
im sure you'll be the one
who cuddles me in close
as i struggle hard to run.
and if it stings
it may be just a little bit
but i know it's not that bad
i know that i'll get rid of it.

And when i
go through all these things
emotions, good and bad
experience these feelings.
And when i
go through all these motions
good and bad
experience the saddest things
or getting really mad.
i know you'll be there
when i.

When im lost
For me a flashlight you will seek
so i can find a way back home
you'll carry me on your shoulders i am weak.
When i cry
those sentimental tears
im sure you'll be beside me with the tissues
sitting by me in your chair.

And when i die
I know you'll be holding my hand
run your fingers through my hair
missing me but you'll understand.
When i go away from here
you'll be there looking at me
while you shed away the tears.
As i lay in rest don't worry
ive had a real long life
i had you beside me and you've been
the perfect wife.
And those nights you'll remember holding
tight, missing me so much
but knowing this is life.

And when i
go through all these things
emotions, good and bad
experience these feelings.
And when i
go through all these motions
good and bad
experience the saddest things
or getting really mad.
i know you'll be there
when i.


Details | Ballad | |

Slumber

In the night time, through
the darkness comes the voices
of all the pain and agony.
They disguise themselves
as friends who want to help
but i say no and they just won't
let me be.
In my dreams they always haunt me
show me things i can't control
how do you deal with seeing someone you
love
die in front of you, it's like ripping out your soul.

At night i try and slumber
but they always visit me
they awake me like the thunder
just so they can mock me.
At night i try and slumber
But there voices break the breeze
They awake me, to take me under
so they can bury me.

So they show me all these things
and i lay there wondering if i'll
wake up before it gets worse.
As the dreams get more persistant
And they horror comes in bursts.
I can't wake up, i can't let go
Claw at the walls, try to get home
and as i wake up in the cold sweat
im feeling defensless and alone.

Why can't they let me be?
Am i own worst enemy?
Am i the only one who can feel
these dreams?
Is it all inside my head?
All the feelings of the dread, and sorrow
not knowing if there will be a tomorrow.
Im trying get through today
trying hard to find a way
so when i got to bed at night
a peacefull rest and on a soft pillow
i will lay.

At night i try and slumber
but they always visit me
they awake me like the thunder
just so they can mock me.
At night i try and slumber
But there voices break the breeze
They awake me, to take me under
so they can bury me.


Details | Ballad | |

Endless Maze 2-13-05

                                         I’m sitting here on my bed
                                        With so much on my mind
                                        So little I can understand
                                        through the cluttered words and the shattered dreams.
                                        I feel although I’m in an endless maze.
                                       My head is spinning.
                                       The tears fall down on my confused face
                                        and all I can do.


Details | Ballad | |

An Opening

The very ground is full of holes
Watch thy step, watch thy step!
Trust in your ability to graze lightly in the wind
As we flutter hovering above the dry grounds 
 that lay upon cracks of mass kayos
Fears met by fears
Dreams met by dreams
So use your imagination and dream
 Of sights far off in the distance
A distance of no boundaries
Whistle to the harmony of mind, body, spirit
For if we choose not to soar with the graceful breeze
We shall feel the waves that grasp, and into the sea of tears
Waves bringing us down and up in a continuous cycle
As these waves cast you down
Fight for there is an opening
You shall rise above as your body brushes against the shore
Look up and you shall see the sun illuminating all nature
All that you see shall be


Details | Ballad | |

Whatever You Wanted

Here we go fighting again
and ever single time you think you should win
after words the things you say have me wondering
about everything.
And are we really together or is this just a fling
not for me but for you, as it seems your studdering
as i ask you where you've been, now it's thundering
the rain hits the ground with a thud and im sitting
here waiting for you to say something.
Finally you open your mouth
how dare you!, you say for me having doubts
i guess the phone numbers i found are out of bounds
and to question you is taboo about you whereabouts.

Whatever you say it's all the same
it comes out one side like it's me to blame
you make these excuses that turn out lame
but the bad things you've done turn love into hate.

How could i? dare to ask you about this
i would rather talk it out then fight with our fists
but that's just it isn't it? you'd rather we hit
because you know that your wrong and this is your way
out of it.
Sorry but im not stooping down to your level
and the love i had for you now it's starting to rebel
the evil you put me through, like running on a treadmill
after something that i always wanted but i noticed
that ive always been standing still
finally im ready to fight ive got the will
to break away from you and your poisonous shill
so like a bad habit im dropping this pill
and before you know it i'll be headed for the hills.

Whatever you say it's all the same
it comes out one side like it's me to blame
you make these excuses that turn out lame
but the bad things you've done turn love into hate.


Details | Ballad | |

Loss of a friend

Funny how life goes on no matter how wrong your day has been.
   no one thinks to ask if for you time has stopped or when.
From time to time through out the day your mind forgets what's true,
   then a frontal wave and it all comes flooding back to you.
Friendship, laughter happy times began to flash,
   I took for granted the best of times would always last.
His smile lit hte room that now seems so dim,
   all I ever recieved was friendship from him.
My fond memories shall never slip or fade,
   all his debts to humanity are now gone and paid.
All that's left to judge him is the Father to us all,
   I hope he can see past the confusion and see the great guy I saw.


Details | Ballad | |

Only She Cries

What If I told You That I Loved you
would we care
would we die
 Chains surrounding Alice
Only She Cries
 
World Banished her
Love left her
all Alone
Melancholia presides over
 
Alice dies again
Will she ever reign
 
Will she ever see
what’s here to be
Only She Cries
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
Empty Without a savoir
Will She ever be cured from this
will she breakaway
Gaia couldn’t be so cruel
Just to wail away—Let the Banshee Crie
Just wail away the pain
wail away the pain
 
Enter my heart and you’ll see
that Was the only thing you could ever need
Alice; only she cries
let it show
That love never dies
Through Euphoria
through melancholia
 
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
You didn’t know
how you could save her
Only if you could her
Alice dies
Only she cries


Details | Ballad | |

Talk

"The way i was, things ive said
  didn't mean it, having regrets.
 for all the hurt as it drains
but the harsh feelings retain.
and the tears pour down like the rain,
dripping down the jilted drain.

I never got to say im sorry
Wish we had a chance to talk
I never got to say goodbye
Before you left for the longest walk.
I never got to say im sorry
Wish we had a chance to walk
never got to say my goodbye
and never got the time to talk.

you can hear me, this i know
the day you left, i just didn't know
your last time being home.
so many things i had to say
but time took it all away.
and now the earth is so cold
and so alone.
as i wait for your voice but hear
an empty dial tone.

I never got to say im sorry


Details | Ballad | |

Agoraphobia

There are places in this world
that i can't go
The safest place i know
is inside of my home.
At times i just feel
so low
And other times i question my
motivations for getting out of bed and coming
up with the answer being unknown.

People that i'll never meet or see
as they pass by on the street
nervously i turn the key
to get back to my room.
And if you asked me this today
i'd tell you i'd never asked to be this way
can't help it if it's to hard for me
to breathe.

There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
who tell me all the time that im fine
and they know just how i feel.
There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
that it's all in my mind
but they don't understand that
it's real.

Most just don't understand how hard
it is to be dealt this hand.
Now im not complaining it could
be worse.
But people mock and laugh because
of this brand.
Makes me punch the wall in anger breaking
it with my fists.

Walk just one day in my shoes
Just how good would you do?
Would you let everything ride?
Or just run way and hide?
All the pain and misery
Lonely nights when you can't sleep
All the thoughts inside your head
Feeling nothing more than dead
Go ahead i challenge you
Take some time and think it through
Then maybe you'll know what it's like
to be me, and not you.
                                                                                                                                             
There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
who tell me all the time that im fine
and they know just how i feel.
There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
that it's all in my mind
but they don't understand that
it's real.
There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
who tell me all the time that im fine
and they know just how i feel.
There are doctor's and psychiatrist's
that it's all in my mind
but they don't understand that
it's real.


Details | Ballad | |

It's ashame

Where will love take me but up a hill and then back down one, yet this sounds so familar,
like a rollercoaster ride its playing with my emotions. It funny how you can  say things
so sweet and pretend like you mean them to make me feel so good but all you was really
doing for me teaching how stupid I am to fall in love and how you can do me any kind of
way and I not realize what your doing. So quick to believe in love to give my heart to you
but you think this is some kind of game; a trophy to be tossed any type of way and when I
tarnish you have no use for me. The cruelty of the world I have no control over I cry
before I take the time to understand I have to move on; withholding any love I have left
to give I am insecure, refusing to truly try again.


Details | Ballad | |

Wait For Me

What we were just yesterday
And who we are today
Makes me wonder just a little
To you whom I might say
Thanks for being special.

But sometimes you aren’t so innocuous
For this is what scares me the most
I never know what you want of me
Or if we’re really close.
I hope I am someone disparate
But if I am not, please inform me now
For you, I can live without.

Michael, please all I ask
Is for you to be honest.
I don’t care for what we share
Is something not so chronic.
But if we try to be more tonic
Than this I know might work
If you trust me, as I do you
Than believe me when I lurk

I’ll be waiting for when we’re together
Your new home isn’t too far.
But when I get there, 
I’ll pray you’re waiting
Pleasantly not looking for mar

But Michael, you’re the one I wait for
Through the next two years. 
Please be there
For me, waiting
I want this to start afresh.


Details | Ballad | |

Dissociation

I see a better world that I can use Its far from you And inside me The reality is too much to handle anymore It's a place we all can love A place where all angels dwell Burnt in my mind everything you've done to me It saves me to go away It's my internal prison It's my only safe-haven I'm my mind there is a place That only I can control Your misery will haunt me no more As Long as I'm in my own reality You will be no more It's deep enough where you will never find But open enough to keep expanding I will not be stapled by your dominance anymore This is it i will take a stand A sky with death In it's smile Rolls across the night It seeks to know what is wrong And the thing is you I'm my mind there is a place That only I can control Your misery will haunt me no more As Long as I'm in my own reality You will be no more I'm my mind there is a place That only I can control Your misery will haunt me no more As Long as I'm in my own reality You will be no more I'm my mind there is a place That only I can control Your misery will haunt me no more As Long as I'm in my own reality You will be no more


Details | Ballad | |

sometimes they dont come back;

america;a white homeless man found in a ditch;by interstate
35 south and feeder road;of austin,texas;some times they
really dont come back;but what if it was me;would it
then;my freind;or would have to be to mean some thing
with the color of my white poor dirty skin;what if i
norma jay bertrand the writer4386/was ran over
would you call it an accident;when i seen this man
thats what texas investigators are calling it;what
a coincidence;two years earlier a black women
did the same in dallas and got away with it;since
a mexican women hit him;says she thought it 
was a deer;america we have a problem then;
same investigators says we walk all over the 
place like that;really like he dosent;like we dont
exist;or blend;yet we are no different than youre
only poor and no home to live in;sometimes we 
are only ghosts of your past by chance no one 
cares to help or look out for;


Details | Ballad | |

Expressions 3-6-04

                                                  Feelings on paper
                                                 Only to be thrown away
                                                 Feelings in art
                                                 Only to fade
                                                 Feelings expressed
                                                 Only to be shot down
                                                 I’ll no longer to show
                                                 No way to know.


Details | Ballad | |

Going Crazy


Thoughts going through my mind.

Never knowing what to do.

Wanting to let it all out but not knowing how.

Cutting, burning ,drinking , smoking, and popping pills .

Is that the way to let my feelings out.

What should I do?

Talk to a friend .Sure they can help.

But most friends don't know what I'm going through.

Never knowing what to do.

Till Now..

I laid all my troubles at the foot of the cross.

I am a woman of god ..

God is the reason I make it through the day.

Satan has no control over my life anymore,

God is my one and only...


Details | Ballad | |

Drink Up Genocide

Drown yourself so deeply it hurts
it tells such a story that no longer hurts
take it from me i'll tell you 
this life you live will send you there
to drink up genocide in this lively air
flying and searching for nothing
while these sparks of knowledge kiss the lips
of one thousand headlights that held you tight
words of sonnets are raining hard only on the brains
of those who believe that trying never makes it
in this world of sancturary that holds this garden of words
that seemingly seep out what we all as one have been thinking


Details | Ballad | |

Relief please!

When people ask me of my religion, I say I am atheist in a demand of tolerance
And in the case of much too many, they never fail to show me their intolerance.
They've been programmed; dogmatic ideas now dominate their existence.
But even through the immense negativity, I continue to channel persistence.
I feel the need to provoke thought, to encourage those programmed to ask questions.
But I am prone to grim defeat from the programmers.

Help me, help me!
I cannot conform to these beliefs that leave all in fearful devotion.
There is no free will; the consequences are to burn.
I don't want to fight, I want to liberate and show how much knowledge there is to learn.
But I am prone to grim defeat from the programmers.

I just want to live in a world of peace.
Relieved of ancient, negative teachings; a perfect release.
Someday I will, I do believe.  I'm waiting for the white light.
But I must fulfill my destiny, experience, and fight with all my might.
Mother God, Father God, watch me!
And don't let me be prone to grim defeat from the programmers.


Details | Ballad | |

Babydoll

Trying to escape from it all I detach from reality Knowing my spirit will be Safe Too much torment have I gone through To know that this story is truly mine Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll In my mind there is a haven Only I can enter, but everyone else is there Its there I will find a new tactic To keep on living in your torment On the way home I'll die a few times But just to know I really lived I'll have to find a new way to bleed If I want to escape I'll have to loose myself Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll


Details | Ballad | |

Ace

Leathers ladies and insanity

that's all that old fool needs

ride to hell and damn the smell

living by his own creed

Your brothers belly's are full of beer

their hearts are full of pride and power

flirting with death and crystal meth

and toking on that wild wood flower

but he ain't no different bro's

He justa whole lot further down the line

Just thought I'd call to let you know

He'll be coming in late tonight

Pool balls are crackin

and the beer is guzzled down

a couple more lines of whatever that was

and he just gonna hang around

Don't know where he's going now

and frankly he don't care

some other dimly lit smoky bar

probably waitin for him there

but he ain't no different bro's

He justa whole lot further down the line

He said to call to let you know

He'd be comin in late tonight

A diesel rig kinda hard on the chrome

so ya lay that mother down

justa couple miles from home

but you're gone before ya hit the ground

Don't where you're goin now

but you can bet your bottom buck

all us earth bound bro's down here

We'll hoist a few and wish ya luck

 but you ain't no different now

you're just a whole lot further down the line

I guess I'll call to let em know

You won't make it in tonight,

so tell the operator, reverse the charges

cause the call's on us tonight,

I gotta call to let em know

You won't make it in this time.

So leathers ladies and insanity

is all that old fool needs

ride to hell and damn the smell 

he gonna live by his own creed


Details | Ballad | |

Outside In

Outside looking through
the window she saw
what she never had
family gatherings and parties
occasions good and bad.
As her breath fogged up the
window and the picture began
to fade
she finally knew why all her life things
felt like one giant mistake.

She whispered at night
God help me im so empty inside
And as she closed her eyes she sighed
I hope that you hear me tonight.

At school they always pick
on her, say mean things, make fun
of her clothes and the way she thinks.
The tears drop down her shirt as
she ponders if this can get any worse.
Walking home, she strolls alone
nobody there to care as the
streets grow bare, she sits in the dark
next to the light pole.

She whispers at night
God help me im so empty inside
And as she closed her eyes she sighed
I hope you finally hear me tonight


Details | Ballad | |

Slightly Askew

Lately it appears
As if something is missing
That spark's not quite there
Have you started dismissing
By becoming increasingly distant

Are you growing immune
At an inopportune moment
Unfortunate events
Are now putting dents
Causing you to lament
All the time that's been spent
Your abandonment issues 
Manifest malcontent
Presenting the case
That resent will torment

It's odd
Your demeanor is this incomplete
Are their things going on
That have led to deceit

There's an unwanted tension
That isn't so sweet
Not to mention the way
You mistreat then repeat
Please don't allow love to become obsolete


Details | Ballad | |

Rise Above

Nightmares to day dreams
feel like my brain would freeze
had no ease, no rest and no
peace.
The hurt blazing, inferno sky's
fading as none of the light came in
hiding in the corner cowering as words
broke my skin, razor sharp like a tack
or a pin and im sitting here left
wondering.

If i could rise above your agony
get past this indignity
would i ever get past this angry sea
could i really ever just be me.

Daydreams to nightmares
terror and rage, energy balled up
and trapped in a cage, no way
i could ever relieve the pressure
feeling like the roof caved in.
Ashamed and unaware of being played
this was her favorite game, every lie the same
so im done being the one you play, that's
all i have to say.

If i could rise above your agony
get past this indignity
ever cross that angry sea
finally just get to be me.


Details | Ballad | |

What would you do?

The day still fresh in my mind
weather escapes me but it's your words
i find, not a father or a daddy
guess i was blind
you made me feel hollow leaving me behind.
And your life is so great now isn't it
i heard you really look it but what would
you do

if i walked up to you
face to face man to man
would you even understand at all.
or would you just walk away without
anything to say
what would you do

if you seen me all grown up now
i guess the years you were gone you'd
think i was let down or run out of the will
to fight just because of you
your kidding me right.
Always wanted to extinguish the light
from my eyes
but to your dismay, im still standing
never going away.
Abandon me then i was upset but now im ok but
what i really wanna know is what would you do

If i walked up to you
face to face and man to man
would you even understand
or would you just walk away, nothing
to say, always seemed to be your catchphrase
now what would you do


Details | Ballad | |

My Big Day

Silence all around me as i walked into the room,
everyone is suppose to be excited iam the new bride of the groom.
Don't give me that look like you feel bad for me,
wats going on where is my husband to be?
Shaking and trembling with thoughts in my head,
if he called off this wedding he is going to wish he was dead.
Has anyone called him to see wats going on?
it's bad luck for me to see him so i refuse to call his phone.
Calm down please! replied mother before you ruin the make up no your face,
Iam going to get married right now i shouted 
today here in this place.
And just like a dream the telephone ring...
hello !hello!  i heard him say with the sound of static,
tell my wife we will get married today i was stuck in traffic.


Details | Ballad | |

Why?

Let me tell you a story
when i was barely five
my father went and left us
with just a faint goodbye.
Told me to my face
he didn't care how i felt
It was all about him now
so forget anyone else.
He was leaving us
for another woman and kid
Like we wern't good enough
for the life that we lived.
And time  again
like the flow of the winds
I blamed myself for all this
and how it came to an end.

But why dad? Why leave?
What did we do to?
Break our hearts to the point we can't breathe.
But why dad? Was it something i said?
Why are you gone?
So many unsaid feelings that never will get said.

And as the years went by
he barely knew me growing up
My school, my grades, dislikes,
award shows, never showed up.
At the court hearing you didn't 
even fight for me
Now you wonder why i have these
devistated tendencies?
And how you made snide comments
about my life
Never understood me did you
even if you tried with all your might.
And the knife you used still resides
inside my chest
And every now and then you turn it
a never ending rest.
                                                                                                                                           But 
why dad? Why leave?
What did we do to?
Break our hearts to the point we can't breathe.
But why dad? Was it something i said?
Why are you gone?
So many unsaid feelings that never will get said.

Days when i was on the playground i cursed
the other kids because there dad's were around.
Now i know it wasn't there fault you turned out
the way you did, it's just now that i found.
That really all the tears and time i spent on you
And all the pain and heart ache that you put us through
Would i be the person i am now if you were here?
Or would i be just like you and would not care?
And when you die i dream of it
An empty church and now worshippers reside in it
I bet you'd finally get that blow to your ego dad
Knowing nobody tried hard to be there that bad.
And when they lay you to rest and put the tombstone
down the only thing we'll share
is the last name that's on the cold dark ground.
Just remember it was your choice not to know me
And now that im a father i thank god
That i learned not to be you but to be me.

But why dad? Why leave?
What did we do to?
Break our hearts to the point we can't breathe.
But why dad? Was it something i said?
Why are you gone?
So many unsaid feelings that never will get said.
But why dad? Why go?


Details | Ballad | |

Lost Life

Judgmental eyes staring through me 
Looking for an answer 
Searching the darkness of my heart 
There is nothing there but a few forgotten memories of you
Frozen in time my heart will forever be
You were the light that once brought warmth to me 
The light that lived within me
Without you I am forever lost in the frozen wasteland of life
Doomed to live out my days without thought
Thoughts of happiness escape me now
Happiness is to fast for my heart, I cannot keep up 
Even from the start I am filled with pain
Pain that is dragging me down to the bottom of existence
I will disappear…forgotten by all, and loved by none
I have been destroyed with or without will or need
As I raise the gun to my head…
I escape myself...	


Details | Ballad | |

The Truth Inside

Outside she's beautiful to everyone
always polite, always the brave one
but inside nobody notices she's screaming
for help.
Outside she's lying, inside the girls
bathroom stall she is hiding
clutching the door closed as she starts
crying.
Outside she's smiling
all of her friends don't have any clues
that her long sleeved shirts cover up
the cuts and the bruises.
Outside she acts fine
like nothing is wrong
but inside she's dying
everything is wrong.

Outside her face shines
Inside she's fading fast
Outside she acts fine
Inside soon she won't last.
She's just denying
everything to everyone
She's just trying not to
mess up anyone's fun.

She deals with it herself
why bother someone else
this is her problem
nobody needs to know.
So outside she shows her friends
a familiar face, not like her inside
a wasteland of an emotional state
The cuts bleed through her sweater's
her depression acts up more and more
Finally she breaks down, her face gets red
but she just can't take it anymore.
she confesses everything that's going on
and everyone reacts with a shock on there face
something that's been happening to a girl
they knew
all this time, all this pain inside her place.

Outside her face shines
Inside she's fading fast
Outside she acts fine
Inside soon she won't last.
She's just denying
everything to everyone
She's just trying not to
mess up anyone's fun.


Details | Ballad | |

Early Riser

I work with the lord on sunday
I call this my fun day
For all the people I see 
and the little boys that get close to me

Father this and father that
I hear all day as their on my lap
not again father a few may say
dont worry boy soon enough you'll be gay

learn to like it, hold your breath
or god will make you soon find death.
god can watch or turn the other way
Alls I know is......
God bless Sunday!


Details | Ballad | |

No Way Out

As the sun begins its ascent into the hazy sky,
I lay still in my bed – 
Trying hard to prevent the onslaught of yet another day –
But knowing full well that my attempts will be futile.

The sense of emptiness seems unbearable,
The obstacles insurmountable,
The unanswered questions too numerous to count.

Sadness has enveloped my soul –
With a grip so fierce it seems impossible to escape –
Like a vice being repeatedly tightened –
With the sole purpose of crushing its prey.

I have been submerged in a thick fog –
A fog of despair and doubt – 
A fog so dense there appears to be no way out.

The world continues to rush by –
Yet I remain standing still –
Unable to catch the momentum of life.

I have fallen into a deep, dark pit of misery. 
I scream for help –
Yet no words emerge.

The walls begin to tumble down around me –
As I franticly search for a lifeline –
As I search for a way out of this deepening anguish.

But the grip of desolation is too strong –
It has overwhelmed me.
It has overpowered me –
And left me alone and without hope.

It has left me with no way out.


Details | Ballad | |

Toe to Toe

Back in the day
people thought they knew
me,
That i would give up so
easily but believe
That's not how i am
today,
And if you got a comment i got more
than enough to say.

If you want a war
Step to the door with me
And if your man enough
Go toe to toe with me.
And if you want a war
On the floor you'll be
The only way you'll beat me
Is in your dreams.

Go ahead and push me
to the limit
Fight all you want you'll just 
end up to regret it
It takes a true friend
to stab you in the front
But if you really want this
then i'll give you all i GOT.

If you want a war
Step to the door with me
And if your man enough
Go toe to toe with me.
And if you want a war
On the floor you'll be
The only way you'll beat me
Is in your dreams.

Open your mouth
insert your foot inside
You talk alot of trash for someone
who likes to hide
Can't even look someone right in the face
They all figured out your just a waste of
there time and space
And one day your gonna wake up and see
that everyone around you aren't your friends
but your enemies.

And if you want a war
Step to the door with me
And if your man enough
Go toe to toe with me
And if you want a war
On the floor you'll be
The only way you'll beat me
is in your dreams.
And if you want a war
Step through the doors with me
Are you man enough to face me?
And if you want a war
Maybe now you'll see
We were best friends now in my eyes
your dead to me.


Details | Ballad | |

Forsaken Eurydice

[Satyr]
A quick game is all it will be
I can tell you can hear my shouts and screams from forest 
Your home it beckons thee
Why won't you come and play with me?
 
Why cant you cure her?
The venom isn't too deep
If you could awaken her once
Cant you do it again
 Did sorrow blind you?
 
 [Orpheus] 
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be 
For I have forsaken my Eurydice 
 
 [Persophone] 
He will never listen 
No is all you will hear
Death is always the killer of love
Death will always win
 
 [Hades] 
Go back to your kingdom
My words have been proclaimed
Your music will not be able to charm
 
 [Persophone] 
Why don't you please
Give him his love
He went this far in vainI
f he cannot see her blank face
Wont why you please
 
  [Orpheus]
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be
 For I have forsaken my Eurydice
 
 [Hades]
If it will please
You can see her
Only without your eyes
Throughout the dark realm
Looking back will forsaken your Eurydice
 
  [Orpheus]
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be
 For I have forsaken my Eurydice


Details | Ballad | |

Lonely Interlude

This damn bed it's so cold now
once a place we both shared dreams.
I remember what you were wearing
on the night that you left me.

You told me to stay there
You had some business elsewhere
everything about that night still so clear
that it's tearing me apart.

And in this cemetary
I lay on your stone
The night is silent and the grass is so cold.
But i don't mind cause in my head
your with me tonight.

You where in that accident, a car hit 
you as it sped, the doctors told me you were
dead and i didn't believe them till i saw
the blood on your dress.

As i lay above your casket
tears flow out just like a river
i make sure that im here, every year
on our special day.
As i touch your stone, trace a name
i used to call with my fingers, i know
it'll never be the same.

And in this cemetary, on your name
i do lay, vowing to make it through
another day.
To make you proud, looking to heaven
as i smile, as your love passes by me
i know everything is ok.
and that your safe.


Details | Ballad | |

Depression 10-9-03

                                            It began as a sadness
                                            A longing for something
                                            A something I couldn’t find
                                           It grows into a darkness
                                           A piercing darkness
                                           That slowly took over my mind


Details | Ballad | |

Everyday Experience

To that of which runs my life
to that of which it runs
I need a place of comfort
where nothings come undone

Can you take these falling pieces
a puzzle of my life
And build yourself my portrait God?
were everything fits so nice

Sing to me oh angels
sing to me through these times
Lift me up with your voice
shut the door on these thoughts of mine

Forever will I be a prisoner?
a prisoner of the pain
Were nothing makes sense to me
were nothings quite the same

This wall is getting stronger 
and I am growing weak
Break the barrier down
To where I can simply speak

I wish to tell you all the tale
of this life that’s split in two
The sun it shines, the moon is lit
which one to which I choose


Details | Ballad | |

Knowledge of the Heart 10-1-05

You must always know
never to break any heart
You must make it shine,
and never make it breathless.
Rememeber a heart can breathe,
and can tell you when you love someone.
It also tells you
what path to follow.
Your heart is very precious,
and very sacret in your body.
Rememeber that the heart
will always help when you need it to.


Details | Ballad | |

What she said

She looked at me with a smile
im pregnant is what she said
What ive wanted all the while
being a father going through my head
But when she told me she miscarried
my fist banged into the floor
And in the corner head in my knees buried
as my hopes had flew out of the door.

Wasn't i good enough to be a dad
or was it just not my right
All the fights they got so bad
Until i finally saw the light
You lied about the babies
Never pregnant at all
Holding my hopes up to my head like a gun
so i would feel like leaving anymore.
How could you do this to me?
I ask myself this today
Do you know how hard it was for me?
Visiting a grave where no baby was contained?

She said, and she lied
All these times
Just to get me to stay.
She said it over and over
And each time it would sting
And the pain never goes away.

She used this line more times
i was to immature
She told me the details of what
they all looked like
Loved to always see me hurt
And take away all my fight.
Breaking my heart so many times
Let my dreams and hopes to die
Are you happy with yourself?
Making up things now to someone else?
As of this moment i am done with you
Apologize if you must there's nothing you can do.
Even though there were no babies i still honor those that died.
Placing little race cars and flowers on the stones of those
who just fought but couldn't survive.

She said, and she lied
All these times
Just to get me to stay.
She said it over and over
And each time it would sting
And the pain never goes away.


Details | Ballad | |

Words Unbreakable 1-29-99

                                                   Words unspeakable
                                                   Air unbreakable
                                                   Actions unthinkable
                                                   Thoughts unsinkable

                                                   Words unspeakable
                                                   Desires unwoven
                                                   Love unwoven
                                                   Touch untaken

                                                   Emotions unrecognized
                                                   Talent scrutinized
                                                   Self brutalized
                                                   Others patronized

                                                   Skin tortured
                                                   Mind captured
                                                   Moment raptured
                                                   Rebirth endured


Details | Ballad | |

listen to the colors

Inside my head in my brain is a gob stopper 
The candy center can hide my pain
The different colors control me be to be sane
Today I’m sad and blue tomorrow I might be red on fire

Listen to the colors

Imagine playing twister inside your head
Spin a color to effect everything you’ve said

Have gotten so tired that you got wired on caffeine
Then you heard talking in your head
That you not too sure you said

x3 I’m not paranoid 

Isolated in my mind
I’m sure here what I’ll find
This world we live in can be so unkind
Rewind back to what I heard
When I’m alive they try and tell me I’m dead

X3 I’m not paranoid 

The more I think the more I say
Things aren’t supposed to be this way
You feel alone and up tight
When your sunshine day turns into a black night

Racing thoughts turned blood red to stop in my brain dead
As the colors change I begin to numb the pain

A little smoke to keep me sane 

X3 I’m just paranoid

There’s got to be another way.
To calm my thoughts and they say
Smoking this herb can’t be the only answer
My stress eats at my body like a cancer
How do I escape the problems in my mind?

X2 I find I have to talk about it.
 
X3 I used to be paranoid 
Now I’m just annoyed
(Sung slowly to close song) inside my head my brain is just a gob stopper. 


Details | Ballad | |

Liar of The Broken Beads

Desribe the word you use when you broke the trust You Lost control and broke all barriers No-one will take you back Redemption was meant for the willing No tears are shed I try so hard to help you But do you even want to get better? How does it feel when nobody will grieve for you You're the liar of the broken beads You had all you wanted but you're never satisfied No tears will be shed No-one will grieve You're the liar of the broken beads


Details | Ballad | |

whatever

My mind has gone crazy
i feel high like i could touch the sky,
i think i might like
it just feels so right
maybe i might
I'm not going to lie
sometimes i ask myself
am i
will i
can i
should i
but am i ready?
is my mind steady?
but my thoughts are swerving like two cars moving side to side
and then CRASH!
your mind just go blank
you quit
it's whatever


Details | Ballad | |

Speaking After a Dream

The walls close in and I find you
A silhouette standing in the blue
The clouds fell apart and I called to the sky
I am left now only to wonder why

Coffee drips into my cup
As my eyes are filling up
‘Cause everything reminds what I did that day
I had to cut him loose, now I have something to say….

So, here I stand
Your wish is my command
It’s been you from the start
And it’s tearing me apart

I just can’t see for the hair in my eyes
And I’ve lost my way but it’s no big surprise
Time I let it so you this is true
You hold my heart strings, the one I love is you.


Details | Ballad | |

Storm

The eye of a storm provides little to quell the stumbling gait of time

Fore shadowing the nimble minded gate crashers with a desire to leave

But flesh eating pores only spur the unending need to cry

Then flys continually drink away any tears

Causing shallow shivering thoughts to spill ripping tempests through the brain

These cold rivers of blood soak up all divine wishs 

Splaying forever a dent in the core of being alive


Details | Ballad | |

life

Life is tricky as most of us have found,
it can slap you up and it can slap you
down. 
The sun always rises to meet us each day,
the sweet air is blowing and making it
our way.
The day seems long as we start the 
trip, we always hope we wont fall
or slip.
The temptation of the human mind is 
all around, it can bring us up and it can
bring us down.
To be "strong" they say is what we have to do,
but how can we do that, if its only just
you.
Being alone is a punishment for me, you see,
I sit and wonder, how to set myself
free.
I hate the night as it falls around me,
I feel captive, trapped and needing
to be set free.
Sleep can help and take me away, 
to a place that i can be at peace,
and often play.
Dreams are all i have to help me now,
I think on them daily from sun up to sun 
down. 
Dont take that part of me from which i 
live upon, without that within me
i would surely be gone.  
 
 
 


Details | Ballad | |

The storm

Darkness, my lovely shroud of comfort
protecting me, while unveiling me
permitting my hollowness to swell
to rise, to be seen

A costume providing no cover at all
yet calling, so lulling
everyday for me if no one else
never failing, always present

I close my eyes and sink into your beauty
my abyss, my sweet surender
your calming nature is my soul's perfect pleasure
hold me, obey me

Envelop me in your arms
always, and eternity
I yearn for your gently kiss
tasteless, and I savor..

I gaze upon five billion stars
so many, all lonely
One pivotal point alone on the Earth
so blinding, yet fading

Fervently, I scream out into the night
two eyes unseeing
everything appears imperfectly clear
rippled, yet flawless

Emotions run rampant with great speed and time
anger and loathing and resentment and .....love?
memories attack like a thousand tidal waves
I'm drowning, who will save me

The wind tears full on my temple
and harshly, so kindly
I welcome the pain, the adrenaline rush
resounding right through me

Then....The Thunder!!-the sky answers back
I'm here, I am waiting
Bolts and flashes like visions of truth
I can't take it, I won't make it

A shower errupts, I peer to the sky
It stings, I embrace it
The water I fear, erodes my facade
I want to keep hiding----now the lightning

Epiphanies from old, come claw at my face
the pleasure, so degrading
The chaos inside grows with the storm
inviting, yet so smiting

I feel my will rise like howls in the breeze
come and get me, wont you take me
I am your puppet--I do what I please!!!
I love it, I can't stand it

More desolate now than ever before
the drops drenching, my heart wrenching
such immaculate pain, just reciting my name
fragile whisper--so diminish

Then stopped the rain

Alone once again...... 


Details | Ballad | |

Promises

Playing all the games that adults seem to play
I don't think I can take it anymore
It's hard to say I love you and look into your eyes
When I'd rather be walking out that door
How can you be so foolish? How can you be so blind?
How can you keep believing that there is still a lot of time
Faith just doesn't cut it when you're trying to get by
And promises don't mean a thing when your dreams begin to die.


   Written in March 1983


Details | Ballad | |

The Lost Wives

THE LOST WIVES

My wife and I were having one of them bonding days,
Where we ate lunch in a café…and of course it’s me who pays!
Then we strolled along the street to look in all the shops.
Now the bug has bit her, this window-shopping never stops.

It’s “Look at this!” Or “Look at that!” And “Isn’t that so cheap!”
Of course I’m going “Yes dear! As I follow like a sheep,
When in reality me thoughts are on being somewhere better,
So she can shop with all her might, and I can just forget her. 

Then when she mentioned ‘Target’ she must have seen me shake,
“That joint’s fifty thousand metres square”, I said “For goodness sake!”
But to addicted shopaholics, they don’t care who bears the brunt… 
“If you don’t want to shop with me then just wait out the front!”  

I waited…and I waited. I reckon that three hours is enough,
So with blood pressure rising and me language getting rough,
I began the dreaded searching up and down the hundred aisles,
And ignored the “Can I help you?” Or the shop assistant smiles.

I stormed past the ladies underwear and then the hats and dresses, 
The perfume and the footwear aisles kept adding to me stresses,
Then I met a bloke close to the lipsticks with worry on his face,
“I’ve been searching for an hour…me wife is lost in this place!”  

I replied “Well that’s coincidence! Mine’s been gone for hours now, 
I’ve searched north to south, east to west and you know somehow,
I reckon we should join our forces, because united we could strike, 
So by the way” I said to him, “What does your wife look like?”

“Well” he said, “She’s tall and tanned, her body shape’s an hour glass,
Her legs are long, hair is blonde, and she’s got a gorgeous…bottom.
Now what does your wife look like?” And without a seconds pause,
“Bugger mine!” I said to him…“Lets just go and look for yours!”
Lindsay Laurie


Details | Ballad | |

Moving on by pretending it never happened

That night I left I was totally sure
I was happy we wouldn't’t argue anymore


Checking my e-mails just to see your name


Reflections in water are blurred and distorted
My mind is no different with happiness retorted


Checking my e-mails just to see your name


The water of my emotions runs clear
There is nothing to taint the memories I hold dear


Checking my e-mails just to see your name


But that’s not true what about the lies and fights
I wish I could hate you and stop imagining this saint

Its time to move on
Delete out box, in box and unsent


Details | Ballad | |

Never Enough

I knew in my heart we were no longer one
It was less than a year and you were already done
We were new parents with a little girl
I assumed we would be priorities in your world
You had other plans unknown to me
My husband no longer belonged just to me
I tried and I cried all that I could
I prayed for you to do what you should
I don't understand why I wasn't enough for you?
Or why this marriage was so tough for you?
We dreamed out loud our future together
We made vows with tears and promised forever
Remember the times you swore you would change?
Then whose life was it that got rearranged?
I begged for counseling right from the start
You gave your word then took no part
I look back and I see all the fighting and crying
It could've been better had you really been trying
How many times did you ask me for space?
And say "don't sweat me, get out of my face"
Then you smile and say what I want to hear
Becoming a better liar with every single tear
Your words say so much but actions speak less
You play with my head and leave my emotions a mess


Details | Ballad | |

A Test Of Your Courage

Constant assurance
a test of your courage
a gauge of emotions and trust

Tell me you need it 
and never want to leave it
this is how I feel love
its not lust

He tells me he loves me 
I question it, does he?
I can't help but fall for it
I must

I'm starting to lose it 
because this heart you just use it 
you've extinguished my soul with
one gust


Details | Ballad | |

Ruby In The Sky With The Sandman

What would you do,
If I snored out of tune,
Would you dump a pail of water on me?

Lend me your pillow
And I'll snore you out a croon,
I will try to keep my snoring to me....

Ruby; I don't have a sandman,
but I do have two concrete users,
Rocco, and Vinny (Asphalt Vinny, they call him)
and I hear they're lookin' for me!



Details | Ballad | |

Blackout Blues

   Yeah, the lights
are out
the masses are
moving, moving
but to where?
     Children play in city parks
      while 
       their elders 
                 fret about
     the weather
       the electro - mechanical techno
          dream we live
           with
                  melts like ice
      on a sunny day
Yes, and molten dreams
are the stuff 
              of everyday 
reality
        here in the heart 
         of the asphalt 
                      homeland


Details | Ballad | |

Why

You have a black eye, your family asks what happened, and you make up some 
lie.
You don’t go around because now you’re ashamed, and all the while he tells 
you, you’re the blame
His words tear away your hopes and the beatings drown your dreams.
The things he puts you through are not just cruel, they’re down right
mean
You no longer have any friends, you don’t even believe in yourself
Right now you don’t even love you let alone someone else
Take a minute think: you are not the blame; there is no reason
To be ashamed; Stop the violence, walk away from the abuse
You don’t have put up with the pain, or make an excuse
You are not the blame, so don’t dare be ashamed
He does not deserve your love, for he doesn’t have love
For himself, that’s why he goes through life belittling, fighting,
totally mistreating someone else. You have to realize you are
the stronger of the two. His only strength is in the misery
that he causes you

By
Gale Hall
 


________________________________________
Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.


Details | Ballad | |

Young Girl Part 2

They say, “Young girl, please don’t cry.
It will be ok if you just dry your eyes.
Write it down. Just let it out.
Tell the world what your tears are about.”

I say, “No thanks. You won’t listen to me.
These tears that keep on falling mean more than you see.
They fall because of knowledge and doubt.
I know the world doesn’t want to know what they’re about.”

They say, “Young girl, tell me what you mean.”
I say, “No thanks. You’ll just push me away.”
They say, “Young girl, don’t be scared. I’m right here.”
I say, “No thanks. These tears don’t fall due to fear.”

They say, “Young girl, please don’t cry.”
I say, “No thanks. I’ll let them fall from my eyes.”
They say, “Young girl, what’s this all about?”
I say, “I’ve learned the pain that this world dishes out.”

They say, “Young girl, you don’t understand.
You are too young. You still need someone to hold your hand.”
I say, “No thanks. I’ll walk on my own.
I’ve learned more than you, and you claim to be grown.”

They say, “Young girl, you better bite your tongue.
You are far to immature and you are far too young.”
I say, “No thanks. You can think what you want.
I’ll learn through experience and not what you taught.”

They say, “Young girl, don’t you cry.”
As I turn around and tell them all, “Goodbye.”
They say, “Young girl, where are you headed to?”
I say, “I’m off to see the world, then I’ll come back to you.”


Details | Ballad | |

As

Can you see
Can you feel 
Should you know what is
I know 
One day 
The world can change
The heart can lie
The heart will lie
WOULD YOU EVER KNOW NOW ....WHAT COULD I SAY 
I FEEL THAT YOUR WORDS ARE NOT WHAT YOU PRAY
STOP THIS NOW
STOP THIS NOW
You should have seen the world thats in front of you
All you think is not for me
But we are both in this same head
Show me the way
my world has sorounded you
only my world will change if you let it not be the same


Details | Ballad | |

Young Girl Part 1

They say, “Young girl, don’t cry.
It’ll be ok if you just dry your eyes.
Write it down. Just let it out.
Tell the world what your tears are all about.”

I say, “No thanks. I’m fine.
I’ll be ok later. Just let me cry.
Let my tears wash this away.
I’m not ready to express my pain.”

They say, “Young girl, hold your tongue.
You’ll understand it all after it is done.
But as of now, you don’t understand.
You shouldn’t speak about that which you don’t comprehend.”

I say, “No thanks. You’ve got me wrong.
I understand more than words to my favorite song.
I see the tears streaming down your face,
And I understand because I’m in that place.”

They say, “Young girl, here’s a pen and pad.
Write down what we say so you will understand.
I know you have ideas of the things you see.
But the reasons behind them aren’t always as they seem.”

I say, “No thanks. I’ll learn on my own.
I don’t need the help of someone already grown.
I’ve got to learn these things alone.
Just like you once learned the same things on your own.”

They say, “Young girl, please listen to me.
You can’t simply say it and expect it to be.
There are problems you’ll face that are greater than you.
And when they come up, what are you going to do?”

I say, “No thanks. I’ll experience things.
I know that if I say it, it won’t always be.
But I know that inside of me
Lies the power to face anything.”

They say, “Young girl, stay where you are.
Through experience alone you won’t go very far.
Some things are bigger than you should face.
What will you do when you find yourself in that place?”

I say, “No thanks. I know more than you think.
The things of the world aren’t greater than what is in me.
You see, within me lies belief and strength.
Those are all I need to get through any place.”


Details | Ballad | |

Old Woman (true tale)

"once i looked up to see
a woman join eternity,
an old woman,
so sick of oldness,
aloneness
lack of direction,
lack of hope,
lack of love,
lack of faith...
so tired 
of the pain
and the horror
of another day
decided today was
to be her last day
on a late date
May, 1969
she breathed for her
last time
I watched in horror,
when she stood 
on the ledge
a moments hesitation
before she finalized
her life
and she jumped
to her end
and I walked
a bit sadder
to see what
life can bring
what pain, 
what undeserved agony,

what could I do?
it was already
too late,
she was gone,
to be with those
she's so long
waited to see again.


Details | Ballad | |

Not Real

your light is what
i was never meant to see.
your shadow i can't remember.
in a blink, i change forms, shape.
nothing can hold me here.
cry if you must, but think!

your kiss is too open
and your words surreal.
can't help coming into
focus.  it's not real.

don't hold on.
i can't hold you near.
count when i'm not  there.
it's not about when we're together.
reach for the last straw
that holds you here.

your kiss is too open
and your words surreal.
can't help coming into
focus.  it's not real.


Details | Ballad | |

My Portrait

A mountain stands before me
The vision of pain
No escape I find
Fear  now overwhelms the heart
Knowing I must climb
Shadows of doubt abound
Silence is all I hear
The rapid river of torment
Grinding its way through me
Revealing an empty heart
Alone all alone
In a world without pity
Rewarding me by bashing
Laughing as I lay bleeding
Alone always alone
Thou I stretch forth my hand
Air shall be all that I find
Hungry for a simple thing
Communication
Understanding
That I too am man in need
Love is now a desert
With one tear
I dare quench my thirst
Death is no comfort
So where can I look
To find the thing I need
That I thought was at the top
Of the very mountain I climb
Which now I see I shall never find


Details | Ballad | |

corporate cold waterfall

once again i need a swim (but these waters are too shallow) so i'll just lay inside 
them.
And the fishes swimming by, had to swallow all their pride. I think something in 
them died as I just laid there inside.
Cos this breeze is getting cold and this sky is getting old. Quickly, shadows wed 
and dine as the sun soon falls behind. (the time passes through the sift and 
through my hand)
I was laughing oh so near... but my dear, you could not hear. You just turned to 
her reflection and you marvelled at her mirrors. The curiosity in your awe seems 
to be my greatest flaw. For no matter if I try, i simply cant stay in your eyes.
Was it the boy or just the man who had took me by the hand? Still I could not 
understand where you were going...
Now how idly I wait, with broken glass and sandy crates; at the feet of all the 
masses- lively maddened in their state.
Thanks for lines, and wasted time... for the tragedies in mind... and in the sea i 
hope to find... the peaceful swim i had in mind.


Details | Ballad | |

The Fours

Daze gone by and things forgotten.
Bees gone! And the corn is rotting....

And then one day... as if to say...
A Chance came by,
from the Cornman's Way.

The young One too, at 22, sat with Me.
And in my yard not far apart,
We sat together,
And Together were Three.

"Notice Time, it's five til nine...
1.55 and we're still alive...

I like your shiny red car.
Glows just right, near
The moon's full light.
Much, like a shiny red star..."

Gentlemen,
As to not tempt fate,
Our visit is Great...
But it's time you two should go.
Not to be rude, but I hesitate,
So I ask you to exit,
By way of the gate.

Oh my O Me, and how I awoke,
Not sure if living or dead.
Confusion was there
and thin was the air,
A humming was loud in my head.

Which day is This?
And which Tomorrow?
Switched Wayz they did,
Or was that borrow?
Fear and panic all around...
The letters spun, mixing
Color with sound!

And then I saw, His card at hand.
And saw the Chance, to begin again.
I'm grateful, and I understand.

Mother said,
Kitten, go close the door...
Your time with Them,
Should be know more.

And then I remembered,
About the Fours…

Psst...
"...it's not a cigar..."
"...use the fours, luck.e..."


Details | Ballad | |

The Autumn

I often watch the leaves blow by,
And feel the autumn winds sweep me away. I try so hard not to cry,
The beauty of time just flying by.
I close my eyes and smell the sweet air,
Utter beauty with just a touch of despair,
Oh the years have grown in age,
The years disappearing white to gray.
Am I truly ready for life to begin,
What if I fail or fall or cant swim,
In the pressures of true life?
These are the times I will always remember,
My mind flowing freely like burning embers.
Wrapped up by love all the time,
Reminding me that my long lost love is finally mine.
But those strong feelings I always get,
As I lye awake on my bed,
Why wont my mind just take a rest?
I guess what they say will still haunt me.
Why am I the object of their aggression?
Diminishing my only piece of sanity left.
I just try to ignore these inhuman feelings,
And focus on things with true meaning,
Love for one will always be there,
Whether I’m frightened, angry, apathetic or scared.
Oh beautiful seasons just take me away,
Send your messengers who have fallen from grace.
Wrap me up with your entangling vines,
Shelter me from these things so unkind.
Hold me back from self-destruction,
For only my life has just begun.


Details | Ballad | |

The Mask

Reaffirm the reasoning behind the mask
Declare the sight seen
Eating of the fruit planted by my own hand
Absorbing the sweet flavor of joy unbound
I see an awesome hand
The strength of doubt which dared bound the heart
Knowing exactly who I am

Trembling within revealing the unseen
Knowing the shame, the dread within
Comforted by a voice unheard
I remove the mask
Releasing the majesty contained within
I therefore am confounded by the sight seen
I see it wasn't reasoning
Twas simplicity that ruled my soul

A wondrous light overwhelms my sight
Seeing now that which you have seen in me
Visions exploding truly enlightening
Freely expressing flight
Unleashed by the mask
The mask of doubt which I did not need


Details | Ballad | |

Miss You

I miss the way you looked at me,
That one time in the store;
Your eyes were the color of dirt

After you spit in it-
The color of chocolate, 
Melted on a gray coffee table.
Your socks were wrinkled that day,
They reflected your smile,
Dry and cold, wet in the corners,
Your lips looked as though they were sunburnt.
That day I hugged you a lot,
I was afraid you would slip away.
Your eyes were like my stars at night,
Bright and innocent,
And beautiful to look at for long amounts of time.


Details | Ballad | |

Ol Dumd Cole

'Ol Dumd Cole,
Was a merry 'ol soul,
When he lit up...
His crack bowl...

Butt da' dwug dunn made hyme dumd,
Of da joys 's crack he a'ways sung..
Some daze he mitta lit up dung..
Now hez siten in a cozee place....
King 'a da masta race....
King 'a cwack....
Still fly'in high....
Even if he doon nokw y.


Details | Ballad | |

FOOT STEPS

FOLLOWING YOUR FOOT STEPS 
LEADING ME TO YOUR SIDE 
AWAY WITH THE MADNESS 
THAT DOES ENTER YOUR MIND
LOVE IS TRACEABLE IN EVERY THOUGHT 
EVERY TIME REMEMBER THE WORDS
IN THIS UNBEGOTTEN TIME
HUNTING THROUGH THE COLORS
PAST PRESENT OF SIMPLE TIMES
HEARING THE WORDS I LOVE YOU
FOLLOWING YOUR FOOTSTEPS'
TILL THE END OF TIME
LEADING ME ALWAYS RIGHT BY YOUR SIDE


Details | Ballad | |

reincarnation of thy heart

Do butterflies fly in my mind when time has demised?
Do eyes glide tears of forgiveness upon me?
As a cold heart beat upon we, 
I am pondering in my own hell as I long for she,
Somehow I got to be the beginning and the end, 
The sunlight that brings life to thee as the heavens descend, 
After life like life we so heavenly in,
But Just Friends Feels like foes and we will never be so close,
The end is the beginning as we choose different path in life’s fork in the road,
Fait has so formality sawn a chapter in this bottomless heart,
My consecration to stay faithful to this scar,
When my brain waves gave unto the dark, light there you are, 
For the chapter is timeless as I slip unto my rest,
 That possesses reincarnation of thy heart,


Details | Ballad | |

Rocky

Rocky, Rocky
Longed to be a jockey,
But poor Rocky,
Was far too stocky,

More muscles than the horse,
Eliminated him of course,

He tried to slim down,
To win the Derby Crown,
But failed at this,
And was destined to miss,
The goal he sought so bad,

He watched from Kentucky Downs,
With naught but frowns,
And angered that,
Those little clowns,

Had the job he did covet
And they did not love it,
For each of them, it seems,
Wanted to be a muscleman,
That was their fondest dreams.


Details | Ballad | |

No More

I waited all night long for you
with my eyes wide open.
I had an idea you wouldn't show...
Oh, but I was hopin'
Lying there on that old couch
and staring at the ceiling.
No matter how I tried,
I could not shake that feeling...
That I was being betrayed...
Forget the promises we made.
I've never been this hurt before...
No lies
No more.
Could you look me in the eyes
and just tell me,
What is this curse
that suddenly's befell me.
This is purgatory...
Hell's around the corner
for me...
I stood at Heaven's gate.
I held an angel to me...
But when I closed my eyes,
You really stuck it to me.
Just tell me,
what's it all for...
No more lies...
Look here, right into my eyes...
No more.


Details | Ballad | |

Suzie and Mikey

They are sister and brother,
Yet not quite the norm,
Suzie wants her doll, 
And she'll keep ranting
 long and loud,   
Sometimes flying off the track,
Violence can erupt,
No way tp figure out, how and when,
She's a terror to handle,
This autistic child,
Seems only Rosie can do that,
the woman I love..
Tender words she does use.
Only my Rosie can calm her,
This poor lost troubled child,

Then there's Mikey,
Perhaps more peacful is he,
Just rocking back and forth,
Rocking so endlessly....
Maybe he's happy, in his own world,
At other times he can become more active,
And then the pain shows for all to see.

There are many others, in this clan, so seemingly cursed,
Deep, dark secrets of childhood sexual abuse,
By peripherial relatives dealing with their own phsychotic demons,

And, as almost always the case, Mama doesn't want to hear it,
The abusers Masquaraides too clever,
And all the others, all effected, insane brother,
Oft in jail,
troubled,pill dependent sister...
Another sister expecting to be poisoned daily,
So many people molded in pain, and in a disfunctional confusion.
The one Pillar of Strength is my Rosie...
From the sad day of her mother's death,
She has to ruled this insane mess.
As close to a "Mother Teresa'
That we'll ever see.































Details | Ballad | |

Questions of My Heart

I look toward the heavens searching
Hoping for answers
Seeing only the stars shinning above
I too begin to doubt
Is there a God
My heart becomes wrenched and torn
Hearing nothing in return
Faith he said is all I need
A seed  without soil
Watered alone
Questions are all I have
Questions of my heart
Answers to some  have I given
For I see an infant born
The life abundant about me too
Is that God you ask
Look and see
Does it look up toward the heavens
Attempting to reach the glory of the sky
Do the stars then look down
No, so they then remind us too
Look up, look up they cry
Look up in hope  
Answers you will find





Details | Ballad | |

One Fateful Moment

I was nineteen, and he lived on my street. 
I don’t know when, I don’t know why,
But I ended knocked up and living in the streets. 
We were married, divorced, I guess that’s just the course of life.

‘Cause in one fateful moment everything changes. 
In one fateful moment life rearranges. 
In one fateful moment dreams can be shattered. 
And in one fateful moment, my life doesn’t matter.

Well I never figured, I was that way.
Until I saw her, on the subway one day.
We had some great times.
Together, we were happy and sad.

But in one fateful moment everything changes. 
In one fateful moment life rearranges. 
Catching her cheating, just wasn’t part of the plan. 
So now I’m running, running fast as I can. 

City, after city. State, after state.
I thought I was lost, couldn’t find my place. 
I was wondering how long I would last in life’s race. 
Then there was you, and you saw right through my disguise. 

It was that one fateful moment where everything changes. 
That one fateful moment where my life rearranges. 
Where my downs became ups, and my frowns were now smiles. 
Where my dreams come true, and my wish is just for you.

My one fateful moment was when I saw you. 


Details | Ballad | |

Maybe

You think a story like this,
Would be easy to tell. 
But I can’t help fading away,
Just trying to figure out what to say.

Times flying by, 
Trying to help with the pain.
But its digging in,
Just making feel worse to day.

My voice is wearing thin, 
And I’m wearing out.
I don’t have much time,
But I have to figure this one out.

Maybe it’s a dream, 
That I can undo.
Maybe you’re still here, 
And I’m with you.

Maybe, maybe.
I can change me.
Maybe, maybe.
I can save me.

I don’t want to walk down along hallway,
Toward the light anymore.
I don’t want to cry myself to sleep,
Every time I feel pain.

I want to move on,
Maybe just have fun.
I want to get a clue.
Maybe I’ll be like you.

Maybe, maybe.
I’ll find me a friend.
And Maybe, maybe.
This won’t be my end.

Maybe I’ll find someone,
Who will always be there.
Maybe I’ll find one person,
Who can finally care.


Details | Ballad | |

Pop! Goes The Weasel

Pop!  Goes the weasel...
When he shot...
The guy behind the easel...
And stole his silly paintings...
All about there were faintings...
He ran from the chasing cops,
And made but few stops...
One for a beer...
One for some schnapps...
Guess he got a little wasted...
As he dropped the art
He had hardly tasted...
Now one wine,
and he was wasted...
Grabbed by the cops...
He was soon pasted...
With crime charges 
He soon embrace'd
Cause he was tired of art theft,
And he was color blind, and with no sense of depth...


Details | Ballad | |

Duece Game

 Duece Game
   
 
Is it Advantage In? 
Is it Advantage Out? 
Or Duece? 
Many Questions surrond my heart
Unsure of what has been entered into
I know what I see
It is good and blessed
The direction yet to be seen
Many Questions
remain not asked
dancing delicately
in and around conversations
In time you will know
So we will go
and grow
My heart that is softening
No more questions will it surround
The questions that need to be asked
Soon will no longer remain.
It will be a duece game equal partnership


Peter B LeBuhn
 
 


Details | Ballad | |

The Ship part two

down deck, down deck, on and on-
such an awesome ship it had been-
100,000 tons, or more, I guess-
that it will sink seems such a sin-
this mighty ship afloat-
not much longer, I did know...
and even with her cold steel strength
down she would soon surely go,
to the sea she was nothing...
like a little twig, no task for her to snap....
the sea can always laugh at man-
when he falls into her deadly trap

despair kicked in, and sure
enough- despair was well deserved-
'cause death was facing me that night-
death that I had truely earned-
my soul was going down, way down
forever to be rightfully burned-

yes, it was foolish enough-
to challenge the sea-
and madness to kill the men-
now my poor luck to be the only one-
that's left-
to face a gruesome end

I leaned against a cold
engine room wall
in the deepest bowls of the ship-
I was consigned to what was approaching-
I waited for my end to come-
hoping, asking God, only it be quick...
my concern wrapped around me,
very, very thick...

the water's cascading now, my friend-
it's going down so fast!
eyes turned up in search of God-
I knew my fate was cast...
my Lord, I hope you accept this fool-
however, I'm dying slow-
the sea, it hurts my lungs so bad-
and the pressure is just so-
I'm dying, Lord, I'm dying!
Oh, sh_t, I'm goin' down-
Dear Lord above, around, beneath me-
please accept me as I am- 
a fool, a repented sinner. a victim
and a murderer too-
I'm sure you can take me-
please show me that this is true-

my bones are now at rest-
in this lonely, sunken tomb of steel
whitened, weathered, beaten-
hopefully someday may to be raised-
to my surprise, I find,
below the seas- so many great comrades-
we number in countless billions-
as do those that live upon the earth
and now I understand, too late, perhaps-
just what a human life is worth.


Details | Ballad | |

Starting Over Again

Whatever happened to the time we used to spend
Whatever happened to my long and faithful friend
And not matter how my heart will seem to mend
I'm tired of starting all over and over again
Whatever happened to the love that we were in 
Whatever happened to the dreams that we'd begin
And no matter how my life will seem to mend
I'm tired of starting all over and over again	(Chorus)

I see the signs of yesterday yet I won't assume
Because I know what that will make of me and you
But I see the same old patterns every week and weekend
There's not a change so I have a hard time believin'
Yet I don't want to judge the future looking at our past
But if I can't depend on you then how can we ever last
I just can't deal with going through the same old thing
And your actions speak so loud you've left me wondering 

(Chorus)

If you're dedicated to me give me more of your time
Than you give to any other, let them know that you're mine
If you're committed to me, be faithful, kind and true
And remember you said you love me the way I love you
So history won't repeat itself you'll do whatever it takes
By always saying what you mean, doing all that you say
To make us work, keep our dreams, here's one last chance
For you to put your love in action and give a little romance

(Bridge)

Cause every man will proclaim his unfailing love
But what girl can find a faithful man she can trust
She just can't deal with going through the same old thing
And your actions speak so loud you've left her wondering 

Whatever happened to the time we used to spend
Whatever happened to my long and faithful friend
And not matter how my heart will seem to mend
I'm tired of starting all over and over again
Whatever happened to the love that we were in 
Whatever happened to the dreams that we'd begin
And no matter how my life will seem to mend
I'm tired of starting all over and over again	(Chorus)


Details | Ballad | |

SLIPSTREAM

Deep meaning 
I cannot say 
Deep streaming 
Showing me.. 
My way 

The four winds 
I saw in my dream 
Showing me.. 
My way 
Slipstream 

An outstretched hand 
Passing by 
Slipstream 
Invisible in a blue sky 

Tumbling over and over 
Passing by, 
caught me 
Threw me up high 

Where do you go? 
I cannot say 
Slipstream 
Showing me.. 
My way 

A grain of sand, 
passing by 
An outstretched hand 
Threw me up high 

I cannot always dream 
I cannot say 
Show me... 
My way 
Slipstream 


Details | Ballad | |

Cry a Little

Maybe if I run,
Never to return. . . 
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if I slide
The blade across
My wrist and bleed to
Death,
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if I die 
From that crystal meth,
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if my world died down
Forever, and gone
For good,
You might just miss me. . .
And maybe You'll cry a
Little.


Details | Ballad | |

A World To Ponder

As I lay, the world around me alive yet hushed, time rests still to let the mind 
catch up with it. A night sky with one sea of clouds and the sun reflecting 
monsters created by accident lays still. While these beautiful monsters, in their 
size, kill the grass they stand on, their beauty takes away breath from all living 
things. Soon the sun will cease to shine on the melancholy above us. The waters 
will recede back into the horizon as the sun wakes up to shine on flowers 
abroad ‘till it is bored of sitting in these flowers and goes off to explore all the 
other wondrous designs once shown in Eden upon soft pedals of gentle, yet 
plagued life.
	Songs of sorrow come from the ones left in the presence of one 
mightier than the sun until the beautiful monster comes again with his deadly 
stomp.
Watching, wandering, and wondering, the sun asks, “How is this death so 
glorified. Do none wish to grow, or do they confuse north and south?”

The fish calm, the waves roar to the horizon in understanding. As this reality 
becomes my fantasy-I live in this world that men before me have created.


Details | Ballad | |

When the Sparks No Longer Fly

From the moment I met you
Stared into those eyes of crystal blue
You were the one I have been waiting for
My heart has braved rough waters, you are my beacon to bring it to shore
We walked and talked, sharing our life long dreams
We both worked, went to college, we valued every moment in between
Now you have become my bride, I have become your groom
Love is like a beautiful instrument, must keep it in tune
Here we come up on our tenth anniversary
Three kids, two cars, rehearsals and PTO meetings
Somewhere along the line, we forgot us, our romance gone awry
What comes next, when the sparks no longer fly
I believe we've gotten comfortable, doing the same old routine
This is not the fairy tale marriage, the vision we seen
We need to find that fuel and warm our hearts together
Let's huddle as one and brave the stormy weather
It all comes down to where is our time
In the beginning we were one with our hearts and minds
It won't get any easier as more time passes by
How do you warm two cold hearts when the sparks no longer fly
Maybe it was you, maybe it was me, whose to blame
We were both responsible as keepers of the flame
Lack of communication, each of us on different terms
No fire present but we both felt burnt
Now our lives are cold, empty and dry
Where do we seek the warmth of shelter when the sparks no longer fly


Details | Ballad | |

im never right

Its like when i wanna do right 

i seem to do wrong

then when i try to do wrong 

i still am wrong

and when i try to do right

i wind up doing wrong

and when i try to do wrong 

im still not right 

so please tell me what im supposed to do in life