I sit alone and I think of you, hoping you can hear me
If I close my eyes just before I sleep, I can see you more clearly
Even where I am now, where everything is dark
I can feel you here beside me, gently tugging at my heart!
Anxiously, I wait to hear a precious word or two
Something to let me know you feel me as much as I feel you
I take the blame and apologize for these nights I have denied you;
But this gives me time to love your mind before I lay beside you!
Let me take away your pain; wipe away your tears and guide you
Let’s make love by pen and paper before I meld with you
I hope my words don’t sound too strong but passion has no fear
Each breath I breathe like ecstasy that has built up during this year!
There is no cure for what I feel it’s just the pain that ails me
All prescription meds from the medical doctors have failed me;
And I know this is a lot to take in but I mean each word sincerely
This hungry letter sent with love and passion hoping you can feel me!
Note: Written for Audrey Carey's Sentimental Love Letters" Contest
"This is dedicated to all who understand this. Whether we like it or not." -D.J.E.
I wasn’t gonna write this
Emotions are stirring high
How much time has passed
Still feel your presence
Of the slowest death
To these present seconds
An ugly revelation
Tainted the sunshine
That bared on our souls
365 days ago
So many tears
Had filled the ocean
For love’s river
Were held back by presumption’s walls
The dam’s of what could have been
Here I stand
In this present moment
Your essence still lingers
Like the flakes of a dandelion b r e a k i n g f r e e
From its home
Tormented echoes of “why”
“Please don’t go”
“I love you…I love you so much”
High pitched resonations
Rafts of secondary importance
This heart still knows
For it will always recall
Played me a fool
While you held hands
Across my shoulders
Left me uncomfortably numb
All my rights
And all the while
My foolish hopes
Continued to warp my mind
Maybe if I didn’t look back when you walked away
Like the rules said…
These soft acoustic riffs
Replay in my head
You were my “Wonderwall”
“You could’ve been the one…to save me”
But I overcame
Didn’t want to be an inconvenience for you
Colors of Fall
Your favorite season
You were like Summer & Winter
Knew when to turn up the heat
Make me sweat
Each new arrival
A summer equinox
But, when it was over
Nothing but cold
Even solace’s bandages
Could not heal
But, I weathered the storm
And would do it again
Cause it was for real
Here I am
52 weeks have past
Of that hourglass
With no more sands
Buried in dragon’s chest
You are in my silent prayer
Even though you are contained
Within my heart’s asylum cell block home
I loved you
With all that I had
That you will be the only regret
I will ever be proud of.
© Drake J. Eszes
You didn’t notice my tears.
As you both kissed each other
like two lonely plungers
who just escaped from plumber’s solitary confinement,
your eyes open and wander up.
You didn’t look across that banquet hall
with my feet planted against wood polished tendencies.
Its creaks motioning time towards yellow-signal identity.
As my breath declares sudden death
against lake’s dripping reflections…
…you didn’t think to set your photo album on private.
wrapped in pretentious cloak
sewed in recycled fibers of “love”.
With ignorant enablers speaking chic-flick tongue,
“Oh My Gawd! I’m so happy for you! I wanna ovulate!”
As I, put my head down
returning to this moment in time,
I had to let my song…cry.
Lenny Williams begins to exude “cause I love you” chorus,
as I walk towards bar
sensing your seductive retinas
stroking against my Latin swagger.
Your ring finger
chained by 3 carat, naïve cut, diamond
motions an intense, streaking caress
against wine glass filled with Zinfandel sin.
Because you know I am your addiction.
Your diabetic lips never forgot
But, you didn’t notice my tears.
I wish you had.
For all this time, these tears
were of joyful splendor.
Because solace holds my hand
with candlelight warmth.
Slow dancing with my soul
in mystery Salsa sway.
While you stand on home plate,
holding your 2nd place trophy,
with 3 strikes against you.
A reminder that my heart,
was flexible enough
© Drake J. Eszes
Tell me that this fear is just paranoia in my mind,
we're not straining, we're not struggling,
we're not sinking, we're just fine.
I'm not perfect my dearest, but damn have I tried,
and I'll try harder but I know I'll have the same results every time.
Do you want me all the ways that I am?
With all the struggles and the tears and the clinging to your hand.
I fear your getting further and Im left on the shore to stand,
watching you in the distance with a bullet in my hand.
Tell me all this worry, its just clutter in my mind,
tell me not to worry that we're doing just fine.
Cause Im scared to run you off and I feel Im falling deep.
And Im so frightened of these thoughts that its getting hard to sleep.
All I know is that the heart wants what it desires,
because of you the match inside has turned into a fire.
And I feel the broken glass thats sticking from my skin,
Wondering if you'll remove the pain or push it back in.
My hearts frantic wondering if you feel the same,
pleading and begging for more than just a saying,
but to feel and to see that im not alone,
with being in this love thats overwhelming.
Once I told you that we didnt have a spark,
but you were lighting up and I was sitting in the dark.
And this fire, this blaze its wrapped in desire.
Im terrified to lose you, I think I might die or,
maybe disappear from all the pieces falling out,
im going crazy but when i open my mouth, nothing comes out,
and I cant explain to you why I just need to hold you close,
why every time you leave Im scared to let you go,
why these tears are building up behind my eyes,
all I know is that the heart wants what it desires
and it desires to be your wife.
So tell me in my panic, that your words are true,
tell my my dearest what I mean to you,
tell me that this paranoia is all within my mind
we're not struggling, we're not sinking tell me we're just fine
What makes the decision
To flick the switch
To end ones life
For the sake of it
Bullied at school
Fork in the road
To let death rule
Daughters and sons
What ever affects them
They just can't outrun
Sadness and tears
By all left behind
Will they ever understand
The first time I saw you, there was a glow about you
that baffle me. I-I just could not find the right word,
"you had that certain glow about you". Not the way you walk
nor the way you move, "but I believe in miracle's", yes
I do - yes I do. So finally I step to you and ask, would you,
could you smile ? just for the camara in my mind so that the
image of an Angel would be on my mind just in case the world
ended (today) much to soon, much before time. The first time
I saw you naked Angela, my mouth got lost for words-but the one
that slip through my lip's were (mmmunn) "what a gorcious women,
breast like lucious melons", and a voice (sweet) like that of the ocean
and wave's of heat and my idea of nerviousness brings trembeling to
"I do believe in miracle's", "I do not believe in love". Miracle's that it
take to sustain a relationship that the odd's of longivity are against us.
And we do become desponded, most of our day is spent fussing and cussing.
Never to see true love at its best. The first time our lip's did touch, I remem-
ber this Angel who I call Angela, she had my name tattoe across her chest.
Love, became the missing attraction, and you comfort me in my desire to ex
press myself, for I thought I was so macho, never in a thousand years, "will I
meet such a someone (?) that's such a women". A women (aaaah) such a
women, "from her head to her shoe".
Now Angela just in case the world ends tomorrow. Don't denie that there's an
"attraction". O'Angela.....kiss me quickly, "In the heat of Passion".
I wonder why
It's always so strange
and not just strange
but almost a gulp and a choke
even at a letter's close?
Just 'love' is not so hard
It's the YOU
"I (gulp choke!) love YOU"
I can say it silently in my mind
but! face to face
over the phone?
YOU is so personal
Like inserting your tongue when kissing good night
Like accidentally brushing
under the table
"I love YOU" starts all sorts of mild even WILD ideas forming
I am demented
With some it drops off the tongue
as easily as saying "Hi"
I wonder though?
What's back of those eyes
When his wife says to me
When this happens
I always screw up - look at her husband
"Love you too"
I went to the sun for a favor
and asked it to shine only for you
to grant you happiness though you may be sad
bright yellow 'midst so much blue
but when the day decides to end
and the sun sinks and goes away
I give you the moon as a reminder
that my love will never fade
though i can't tell you how much I love you right now
and I can't show you what's in my heart
i hope when you look at the sun and moon
you'll realize we aren't that far apart
It will hurt like a tattoo guns sting
as the ink infiltrates your skin.
Your first love will be like a tattoo on your heart,
always remembering the blessings and pain he gave you.
Be with a person who fills you with fluttering hummingbirds
even after the first and second and tenth kiss
who drinks the nectar of your demons and sucks them lifeless.
There will be men who you think will carry you forever
but after so long of holding
your feet above the water
they will throw you down.
They will not reach out a hand to pick you back up.
They will turn cheek,
kissless and forgotton.
You will stand with dirt palms
and fall back into his inferno.
There will be loves like this,
who convince you to prick yourself with safety pins,
the ones who carry guns on their backs
but never shoot to protect,
only to hurt.
The ones who drink all the water,
leave you parched in the desert of his mistakes
telling you that they are your own.
The ones who shoot arrows in your lungs
and you lye bleeding
believing that the color of your blood is true love for him.
The hour hand will spin around the clock
too many times before you leave him.
It will hurt.
You thought it was true,
but after the death of it
you will realize you deserve someone so much sweeter
than a bitter apple.
Love the one who doesn’t cheat you blind,
but instead comes to you with truths in his wretched palms
and waits for you to
but never gives up and never stops wishing that the past could rewind
that he could change the things wrong that he did to you.
Love the one who feeds your heart warm apple pie,
who cries in front of your children,
who drives them to school and hugs them when they get home.
Be with someone who doesn’t ask for you to change
but instead loves your mistakes
cradles them within his fabric lungs
breathes them in with a grin.
Love is an interesting thing.
You will be thrown out of a moving car to the side of the road.
Some will come running back to you.
Don’t jump back in the front seat,
until you find someone who buckles the seat belt for you.
Drives five under the speed limit,
takes things slowly and waits for you to be ready to accelerate.
I am here for you.
Remember me, the one who loved you first,
the one who will never stop loving you.
Come to me after he breaks up with you.
You can cry on my shoulder,
and ill wipe your tears with my sleeve.
Find a love who loves you the way
that your father and I love you,
the way that your grandmother loves you.
Find a love who already considers you family.
Who meets you
and looks into your ocean eyes
and drowns peacefully into your heart.
. True love
I love the way you make me love you
Love the way you step my heart on the ground.
When you walk into the room
I love the way you do not even look at me.
You take my breath away
With all the words you say,
I fell in love with you more
The day you walked out the door.
I love how strong you became
I love the way you always hang up the phone.
I can't get enough of you
When you want me out of your face.
True love came to me all of a sudden
When you dumped me in our special place.
I take my self back into your arms,
only when I am asleep.
I know I brought your heart a little harm.
Now the boat has turned making my love weep.
You do not bother with my charm
All you do is give me the cold shoulder.
In my book of love, you will get over it soon
In the mean time you are my true love
No matter if I have to do it all by myself.
Until than I will not give you the pleasure
Of forgetting what you gave up.
Stop teaching me the lesson of pay back
Stop playing hard to get,
My one and only TRUE LOVE
The Luckiest Man
I have found that not everyone is as strong
As the skies are wide and the days are long
But in life I have found there is this one
Whose bounty makes me feel as warm as the sun
And from the moment that she first caught my eye
I knew I’d be with her til’ the day that I die
That I would love and cherish her all the day through
And do all those little things we men are supposed to do
And spend my days lost in utter bliss
That I had this beautiful woman to kiss
And there’s one true fact ‘bout her being my girl
That makes me the luckiest man in the world
65 minutes reduced to 120 seconds
Bright lit room
White glossy tone with flowery curtains
Upon window's darkened vision
Your radiance emanated in celebratory gesture
As my eyes fell in love
All over again
But your smiles were too bright to see me cry
Dry heaving sadness gasp
As I looked down...I became the great
The smile pretender
You wore a dark blue blouse, w/body-fitting jeans
Tall, plus-size model stature
My walking fantasy
Dark brown locks of joy slow danced upon flesh that
No longer embraced
You had something to tell me
"I'm getting married to a man who called me, sexy.
We work together in the same building, so everybody knows."
Spanish music behind the scenes
Your witty humor against song
Crackin' my smile within sadness pores
Showing me blank invitations
As I leaned in, inhaling this broken emptiness
Writing out words with her voice
My gentle grin, the eraser
Tears in Cold War mode
Heart enunciating disconnection bliss
"This wasn't how I wanted to see you again"
As satin comforter tries to soften my falling
Falling...into true love's innocence
The same comforter that covered those tracks
Asphalt scarred remnants from the bus you threw me under
"I always wanted you to wake me from my sleep
But not like this"
You became my dream, come true
Becoming dream again
In 120 seconds
He may have called you "sexy" with words
But I called you "beautiful" with heart
Yet you will never value how deep it was
Well, at least you can rest assured
That I got your message
© Drake J. Eszes
"True love never dies...even if the recipient never reciprocates." –D.J.E.
There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'
but when it got little
his pills became skittles
until he O.D.'d on Viagra
© ~JSLambert 2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!
To have the love and sentiment
Of man, a vibrant rose,
Who courts with such a tenderness
While striking such a pose.
His flaming petals, soft and sweet,
That gently brush my lips,
A dashing leaf of lively green
Has slyly swept my hips.
His body tall and stiff with life,
His stalk down through his stem,
The shades of envy darken so,
That he becomes a gem.
His thorns, he wears them strong and proud
Though lethal they appear,
For thorns he bears to shelter me
And rid me any fear.
His velvet quivers in the breeze,
Like dancing sheets on fire,
Caress me love, from head to toe,
And see what may aspire.
For when a rose declares its love
Its pollen it will share,
So soft like dew drops over me,
I am captive in his lair.
Entangled leaf in leaf we are,
My petals soft and pale,
One jagged edge of you I feel
So tender without fail.
You trace my figure soft and slow
For petals, they will break,
But since you hold me warm and safe
They’re only yours to take.
So pick my petals, one by one,
And let them flutter by,
For all this world needs to survive
Are roses, you and I.
I remember the look
In those big brown eyes
As you’d smile and laugh
And leave me hypnotized
I remember the touch
Of your hands so soft
How you’d hug and comfort me
And shake the cold off
I remember the taste
Of your sweet lips on mine
Enthralled in a kiss
For hours at a time
I remember the sound
Of your voice so warm
You’d just whisper gently
And quiet the raging storm
I remember the smell
That enchanted my nose
The scent of your body
Bathed in absolute rose
Yes, I remember you dear
And all the love we grew
And I have spent a lifetime
Making “sense” of you
God is always love
Forever seek the kingdom;
Praise the creator
Keep giving what you can give
Please endure until the end
Protecting the meek ones earth
Watching over us
Helping us to cope with life
Comforted with hope and trust
When you find rhythm
You find your hearts inner core
Celebrate the times
Make them better than before
Reminisce and dance all night
When on life’s seas I’m tempest tossed,
And my hopeful smile is all but lost,
When I need to survive at any cost,
You are my anchor.
My life is filled with simple pleasures,
My loved ones’ smiles I count as treasures,
When kisses are how life is measured,
You are the standard.
As time soars on and birthdays fly,
My hair is graying, I don’t care why,
My mind is sharp, but not my eyes,
You are my youth.
Love is patient, love is kind,
And to the lucky, love is blind,
But when it comes to love that binds,
You are my love.
Alone in loneliness
Amid forever nights
And these four walls
In faint, whisper soft your name
I beg out loud to the nothingness that remains
"Please not another nightmare, no more storms"
But, answers are merely glimpses of light
Filtering through the pane
Cast empty shadows on the wall
Of places where you used to be
Eyes wide open
Now asleep, afraid I am to fall
Trapped within this never ending dream
I cling to all the memories that I have
Spinning me closer to where you were, in parallel on the edge
The thoughts, like imaginary rubble, comes tumbling passed
A fire for you still burning inside
Why can’t I let go of the tragedies last
And silence your unrescued suicidal screams
Or is it only the rain falling faster as it taps harder, and harder upon the glass
Or is it of your wandering spirit
Haunting with its vindications
Of "why’s" I can never seem to grasp
All this amidst lost stares into black windows
Where gutters overrunning, burdened by the strains
And I swear I see your reflection
Among the flashes, tracing out illuminations about your face
And for the first time
You are noticeably absent of all the worldly pains
And your lips releasing out a comfort that for so long I've been seeking
As I hear the words echo within my stormy heart "That where you are everything is okay"
You looked down at me, blue eyes intent on freezing, looked past my tears, and
said you loved me.
There was no expression on your face, no warmth in your kiss, you told me you
cared, and wanted only me.
I placed my hands on your back, kissed that mouth and told you how beautiful I
thought you were. Then you smiled that first smile you told me I was absolutely
When the sweat was dry, and the air was still, you wrapped your legs in mine, and
stroked my hair. You shared all the moments of your past, the plans of the future,
and the child like excitement of your dreams overwhelmed me into tears.
I fell in love with you. I fell hard. I fell for a man who felt nothing for me. I fell into
the arms of something that I dreamt was there, but faded, like the scent of your
skin. I never knew how blind I was. I never thought it would hurt to let you go. I
never thought I would have to. I never thought you would ever hurt me, instead
you crushed me.
You told me you loved me, and you cared. You told me I was worth everything, but
you left me. You just left me. No note. No call. No email. Nothing. You just
disappeared leaving me to feel like everything everyone had ever said about you;
everything you said you were, was true.
I danced with you. I let you in to my heart. You saw my soul. You knew everything.
You were everything to me. How could you do this to me? Why did you have to lie
and tell me it was only me? Why did you tell me I was it for you? Why did you tell me
you loved me, and cared so damn much? Why didn’t you stop to think about me
just once before eating that cake you so had to have.
You looked down at me, eyes still frozen, and begged me to have that baby. There
was a beautiful smile on your face, and you said you loved me.
You watched me move, and I heard you sigh. I thought it meant everything. You
said I was everything. You said you loved me. I thought you loved me
I would taste you up and down,
From the top of you to your base,
Nibble your ticklish places,
Then kiss the smile upon your face.
I would pull you with sweet longing,
To where only you could see,
And place the deepest parts of me,
Warmly within your reach.
You would fold yourself in my safety,
Wrap yourself in my love,
You would feel my passion enclose on you,
And I would fit you like a glove.
I would fill your soul with nourishment,
That only a good woman provides,
You would release all your secrets into me,
And I would hold them safely inside.
You would kiss me and whisper so sweetly,
That from me you will never part,
And gently, eyes down, I would offer to you
The last piece of my heart.
Dark red lips trace your neck, trailing down your chest
I can’t control my lust once I’ve caught the scent of you
Your smooth flesh burns where my chilled lips brush
Your heat steaming off into the winter night… it wants you too.
But you are only mine as you pull me tight against you
Your warmth is for my body alone.
I belong to someone and you are going to show me who
As your hand covers my red lips, stifling my moan
Pin me against the window pane,
Digging into my flesh.
Let the flavor of me drive your senses insane
Drink from me my thirsty guest.
Rock me, grip me don’t hold back
This is your time to release everything angry in your life.
Make me scream, let me fill up what your world lacks
Feel the waves of our intensity permeate the night.
Then, be merciful after I am taken, and now our burning kiss
After you have bleed me and our lust has taken its course
Discover my true and own yearning motive
And give me my taste of yours…
i don't care
to see morning wink
from beneath the gray film
that leaves the day
has yet to end.
is the only veil
yet to cover my eyes
and i'm tired
of playing wife
to the unworthy,
tired of hiding
behind the thickness
of gray moods.
it's raining again
scribbling night's color
upon my cheeks,
kissing my lips
with day's aftertaste,
yet i pretend to smile
when love looks my way.
in all reality
i'm too old to care,
too old to dream of...
night still holds me
in the negatives,
this day's still undeveloped
yet my mind
and my last thought
before anything can blush
is to be walked
slowly down the isle
in satin and bows
to be the bride
i never was
as you lift
the veil of white
and kiss me
one last time
to miss me.
My Dearest Most Only Beloved LENORE , there is Someone I want YOU to meet
My Heartbeat My LIFE My WIFE Let me escort YOU , to YOUR ” Golden Throne “
YOU are my Queen , My everything : My Forever : please come up and take YOUR Seat
This is BARBARA JEAN She put a LOVE seed in my Heart, as YOU can see it’s “Grown”
I fly Like a Cloud , The wings which flutter from my Heart cry out loud Barbara, I LOVE YOU
OHH!! LENORE L E N O R E, My LOVE If I knew the same words of Heavenly Love You know
May I speak in Tongues that YOU understand : May I show You A Forever LOVE; as YOU
Look at my Heart that’s Barbara Jean standing there : Look to your left, Eternally I sit in that
YOU know I LOVE You Forever But here on Earth my Heart screams for Companionship and
Barbara Jean knows YOU as I’m sure YOU know her when You look out the window of Heaven
YOU can see my Heart beating anew , as it does for YOU I do not feel guilty ( or maybe I do)
How long has it been since I’ve seen YOU? I have never seen Barbara Jean, I have felt Her
How long has it been since I heard YOUR voice? in Barbara’s POEMS my Heart does rejoice
I can hear the whispers “I LOVE YOU” from Heaven , the song “I LOVE YOU” from Earth
I am such a lucky man to know two LOVES, Heavenly and Earthly FOREVER and ALWAYS
I LOVE YOU LENORE : I LOVE YOU BARBARA JEAN Thank-YOU for taking my Heart in YOURS
Inspired By LOVE Dedicated to my LOVES : L E N O R E and B A R B A R A J E A N
I'm haunted by the words you wrote
Tell me what you want from me
Don't tell me what I want to hear
Tell me how you really feel
I could be everything for you and more
I'm telling you now I want more
I'm telling you I want to be with you
I want all of you...
Do you want to be with me?
I know you're confused
I'm confused too, confused by you
It's okay to be scared
I'm here for you, I'll hold your hand
This is a risk I'm willing to take
But the decision is yours to make
You write of walking a straight line
I'm here to tell you that now's the time
Now's the time to face your fears
Now's the time and I'm right here
Now's the time for us to shine
Come on baby, let's chase those butterflies
November 30th, 2008
Don 't walk out at that door
I promise not to hurt you anymore
I didn't mean to be a murderer
All I want is to be your lover.
Let 's stay here inside our home
When once love and lust we're shown
Let 's do love in this king bed
With petals of roses spread .
I thought you love my company
But you 're loving me unfaithfully
You 're keeping girls aside from me
Seeing you with other gals happy.
Now you 're happily seeing me dying
That you got my flesh and everything
This silly love is complicated
I got you first underestimated.
Save this heart from anger and pain
love me true, no more love game
Baby don 't leave me like this
This heart scattered into pieces.