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Life Confusion Poems | Life Poems About Confusion

These Life Confusion poems are examples of Life poems about Confusion. These are the best examples of Life Confusion poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

Like a Rock

I carry my mother 
like a rock in my pocket 

that I just can’t seem to throw away 

It serves me 
no purpose, 
it just weighs me down 

~~~
 
When I first found it, 
when I first picked it up 
and started carrying it with me, 

I thought it so beautiful – 
I could look at it for hours 

But, like my mother, 
it never looked back at me, 
never grew warm under my loving gaze 

For the longest, I was blind to that, 
Blind to anything but the beauty, 
blind to the cold, hard, 
beyond-remote nature of the rock,
of my mother,
my stone

~~~

I carry my mother,
a thought without weight

And she’s heavier

and she’s colder

than all the stones
there are

~~~
 
By the time I recognized her 
immutable, emotional unavailability, 
I had run out of joy,
felt depleted of hope –

But I could not,
for the life of me,
stop seeking a beauty, a warmth,
inside her heart

Could not stop
wishing
that one day this stone,
my mother,
deep inside my pocket,

Might just become
its own opposite –

Change from hard to fluid,
from cold to warm

But my rock, my hard burden,
will only turn to water

When my mother
stops being
a stone


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Stargazer

Under 65 degree starry, onyx blanket
Containment of quarter moon identity

A whimsically soothing song exuded
In muffled taps & Prohibition era lyric

In the distance,
Snow-capped mountains reflecting lunar clarity
Off its tips of freedom

As we lay on recycled steel hood,
Made in 1950s USA, when it mattered,
Her silhouetted fingertips released from my right arm
While insistently looking towards stratosphere’s vocal chord

“Can’t it be like this forever?
Oh, how I want to just make love to the stars.
Become one with Orion while riding
On Sagittarius’s arrow”

“What about our stars?”, he softly questioned.

“I’d like to be your never-ending shooting star.
To ride on blue moon’s comet, by your side”

Cricket whispers manhandled his romantic clef
Mother Nature’s afterglow, upon her ears, fallen deaf

Inherent waxy build-up from illicit tongue,
She pat his shoulders like a dog
Being taught his first lesson

Her eyes, still sky high.

“Sigh, I like how you think.
You’re such a nice friend.
You’re going to make a woman so happy one day.
I hope to meet a guy just like you.”

As her eyes sighed with a powerful lack of substance
Into the arms of Leo,
A slammed car door supplants the reverberation of the car’s V8 engine.

He confidently turns back the hands of time.

Reversal gears become his new tune

“If you get lost going home, follow the stars.”

As he pulls away with majestic, amplified lyrics
Of Whitesnake’s “Here I go Again”

Going down the only road he’s ever known

While she stands in fraudulent gasps of shock,
Looking back up to the stars in blank wonder

As he accelerates into a new page in his book
Closing his chapter with wondrous questions

“Why would I taste your starlight?

When you never believed in our constellation?”

©Drake J. Eszes
It’s good to gaze at the stars and make wishes. But, be careful what you wish for. For Earth has its own gifts…


Details | Rhyme | |

Goodbye, My Child

Where cradled canyons sing
Of ebony wood in the forest
There lies a gurgling spring
Where cockcrows sing their chorus
To the melody of singsong birds
There I’ve concealed my sensuous words
Filled with befitted signs
The saccharine whiff of my designs

Come to me my mortal youth
To the wild realm of your truth
Where nymphs and gnomes abound
For the earth is filled with weeping
And only your tears be found

Where the fogs of night are fountains
Spills of glistened moon ignite
By distant silhouette mountains
We dance with passion of fight
Entwining ancient stance 
Mingling hand in hand we dance
Till the mountains smile on high
Near and far we spring
To pursue the realest of dreams
While the world cries at its seams
Anxious in trouble to cling

Come to me my mortal youth
To the wild realm of your truth
Where nymphs and gnomes abound
For the earth is filled with weeping
And only your tears be found

To where the ridges merry make 
From the beaks of wooden bright
In sparkly pools the ghouls awake
That scarce to stir our night
We watch for seekers down under
Muttering secrets in their soul
We bid them lucks of shivers
Dipping gently in
From reeds that hide a tear of a foal
Under the gentle rivers

Come to me my mortal youth
To the wild realm of your truth
Where nymphs and gnomes abound
For the earth is filled with weeping
And only your tears be found

Far away she shall ever churn
The taciturn eyed
She’ll listen no more to turn
To the working mills beside
Or the scrubbing of the barn
May peace weave in her song
She shall wave in the yarn
To a haven known as Belong  

Come to me my mortal youth
To the wild realm of your truth
Where nymphs and gnomes abound
For the earth is filled with weeping
And only your tears be found

For she comes, the mortal youth
To the wild realm of her truth
Where nymphs and gnomes abound
For the earth is filled with weeping
And only her tears be found


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Lucila

So I walked into my local supermarket
to buy my weekly shipment of Kit Kat bars,
Cinnamon Toast Crunch,
and Ovaltine powder mix.

As I shake off the snow on my fake Timberland boots,
my skin,
coated in frozen animation,
thaws into warmth’s teardrops from
the supermarket’s 75 degree vents.

This moist sense of happiness was quickly interrupted
when I heard Wilson Phillips, “Hold On”
over the PA system.

Thankfully, the cutlery isle was just to my left. 
So, now, I had plans!

But, before I could commit felony’s song,
I saw her.

A Portuguese goddess
with a strut that can ruin a man’s dignity.

She had Autobahn curves,
dark brown curls of hair & visuals,
and thick flesh meat that even Vegans would envy.

Her face lacked Maybelline coated misapprehension.
Thank God!
Cause I never did like clowns.

After staring longingly at her,
like a crack head with impulsive eyes upon a broken/unlabeled bag of baby powder,
she breezed past my stifled posture and clocked in to work.

She didn’t even get a chance to smell my $500 cologne called “Piece of Me”.

So with new-found urges to grab all my groceries,
like a burglar who really has to pee,
I rush to express checkout. 

There she is.

Her register beeps in coupon lady’s rhapsody,
while my register needs a cleanup on Isle 9.

Now it’s my turn.

With girlish inner-screams of boy-band intensity,
I say, “Hi”.

She scans my apples, while I scan her melons.
The melons that the customer ahead of me didn’t want…
…they were on sale.

Go fig.

As if she read my mind,
she asks,
“Are you feeling warm now?”

“All I want is to be the heat in your moment”,
which I almost said.

But, “Now I am”, is uttered.

As she smiled with seductive demure,
she handed me my receipt
with her phone number on back.

As I left the market,
I began to get cold again.

These winds of change
became gusts of numbness.

I locked myself out of my heart.

I turned around to go back inside.

Only to discover, 
she didn’t have the key.

© Drake J. Eszes


Details | Personification | |

Umbrella

There she stands 
Centre stage for all to see
Tall and slender 
Precariously she balances.

I reach out for her
Draw her to me 
My hand skims her body 
Slowly reaching her skirt.

Playful fingers find hidden areas
Delighted her legs spring forth
Displaying the very beauty
Of her delicately adorned skirt.

Gaily she dances around
Dizzily twisting and turning
In the brightness of day shading
She gently tends to my needs.

Personal ballerina takes to toes leaping
Merrily bobbing up and down
As emotional to her performance
Clouds cry a thousand tears for her.

Reaching our destination
Slightly shaken, she leans
Watches me quietly drips
Against the wall.

Reminiscent of the day's fulfillment
We acknowledge one another silently
Restful knowing we shall be
One once more.


Details | Couplet | |

Thats a sin

A whole new twist to the same old story
Evil scientist in their laboratories
Creating monsters that live in the night
I often reflect on mankind's plight
As mankind drifts further from his soul
We seek things to fill the hole
The path of lies forever bends
Truth is straight and narrow my friends
As I see it getting bent in every way
I simply find myself compelled to pray
What will become of our sons and daughters
Will their souls be led to slaughter
As scientist seek out another way
To disprove what the bible has to say
Trillions spent in search of a ghost
Another theory of true reproach
Rainbow stars now fill the skies
I wonder what is hidden inside their lies
We can now place a robot up on Mars
But can't help the drunk at the local bar
Trillions more spent on a new space station
But we can't feed the hungry right here in our nation
Seems to me before we go further conquering space
We should maybe try to help out the human race
Our quest for knowledge has drove us insane
We are now so smart we don't use our brain
Our nation was founded "In God We Trust"
Our government says "Let it be covered in dust"
Even this lowly creature up out of the pen
Knows in his heart that thats a sin


Details | Free verse | |

Your Words

Your words,
are projectiles
dripping with Arsenic
and aimed at my heart
spitting out darts and swords 
that expertly find their mark
and draw blood

Your words,
when aimed at others
are carried by Pixies
and sprinkled 
with honey and sugar coatings
that melt in their ears
and taste of confection

Your words,
cloak me in pain and guilt
for undone atrocities
and imagined factors
as your blame
riddles my soul
causing it to
prune, wither, and crust

Your words,
accusing, spiteful, degrading, malicious
paintings of what I once thought
was an indestructible bond of Love
that no one 
should be able to destroy

and yet
you do so
with your words.

I've no soul left
no appetite for your touch
no desire to want for anything

except

to become deaf
so I will no longer
have to listen to

your words


Details | Couplet | |

The Breed

Sometimes within the walls of today
We simply search for another way

To make this day all it should be
I must learn to live eternally

A blessing given or one took
I live my life inside a book

Each new day is another page 
I sit in the circle and burn my sage

Asking Grandfather to help me see
Exactly what a true man should be

With the blood of an Indian and of a white
Life is most certainly a spiritual fight

Half of me hates how the other half-lives
The white man took all the Indian gives

Then the white man decided to take some more
Slaughtered the Indians from shore to shore 

Brought an end to a beautiful way of life
“We will kill the man and rape the wife”

They called us heathens but don’t you know
Was the white man that had a heathen’s soul

Half and half, the blood of a breed
Poisoned by a white mans seed

It’s my Indian half I love the most
My white half is turning into a ghost 

Through my veins flows the blood of a brave
Though I lived my life as my white halves slave

Jesus Christ, nailed to the cross for me
Now my Indian half enjoys living free

Though freedom is a frame of mind
In the circle of life it’s truth I find

With each new poem I’m able to see
A little bit deeper up inside of me

Which enables my soul to truly live
Making my heart strong enough to give

All the faith that is found in a seed
I reckon half and half, is good breed

----------------------------------------------
Posted in respects to James Fraser


Details | I do not know? | |

Anger

There it is again
Bubbling up from within
Wretched wrath washing over me
Vile disgusting filth freely flowing
Angry demons seizing control
Forced attrition to evil urges

Screaming 
Yelling
Rants of rage

Watched from within
Helpless
Powerless

Unable to soothe the beast
Surrender to aggression
Until the bile is expelled
Vomited forth in fury
Leaving only the bitter tastes
Of regret and sorrow 


Details | Limerick | |

Sweet and Salty -LIBRA TALE

      LIBRA  TALE

Sweet and Sour hectic sign
Love me, trust me, the stars align
   Balance of truth and dare
   Good and Evil, full of care 
Blind when it comes to blood line


 
:) PD


Details | Free verse | |

My weakness

        GOD

Wondrous of many blessings.
Smiling never a frown.
My prayers, Lord, are  suddenly being ignored.
I've taken a tumble of  fallen down
Lord, my life was plain and simple  
How did it come to this.
Lord, now I carry a  burden so deep
A torn up life not easy to fix
Hard to get my prayers before I sleep
Bleeding only internally!
Feeling very minutely!
God, have you deserted me, or is it me who deserted you?

God, my Lord, my savior, how could you abandon me?
Must I drown in my own sorrow.
Must I wake up like this today and tomorrow.
Why have you left me, or is it me who left you?

God, I need you like never before.
When I wake up,
When I head out the door.
Tormented in a mood ring of stock
Heavily my tears hit upon the floor.
God, do you not feel me, or is it me who no longer feel you?

God, what is your plan for me?
What things did I not see?
I asked for you to forgive me in my ways of sin.
Why do you let him provoke me?
Lord, I forbid for him to win.
Relieve me from his gutless pain.
God, do you not believe me, or is it me who no longer believe in you?

God, do you not hear my call
My pitiful excuses make me weak and small
In your eyes I no longer feel tall
I remain cursed in every single fall
Lord, only you can break this wall
Do you not see me on my knees
Must I beg and crawl?
I am at your mercy, crying out with grief
Open the path to the lighted hall
O' Lord, the day you judge me before your throne
Please tell me it was a lesson for me to stand up on my own
God for now I will end this talk
With the dignity to never look back
And ask if you were there on my endless journey of a relentless walk?

By:PD


Details | Narrative | |

New Road

In a new road,
Rain will fall,
Wind may blow,
Swifting our woe.

The road forever on and on,
Many paths to choose,
Many paths to take,
Home behind,
World ahead...

Through the shadows,
Through the night,
Clouds going by,
There we will lie,
Very deep,
Seeing shivered land,
Seeing the dead seas...

Through the edge,
Miles to go,
Singing by,
Darkness rising,
Vanishing light,
Hollow flourishing,
Going by,
World ahead,
Home behind...

Rain may fall,
Through the nightfall,
Through the twilight,
Through the dusk,
Through the dawn,
Beyond mountains,
Beyond stones,
Standing strong,
Wandering lost,
World ahead,
Home behing,
Paths on and on,
'Till the road comes along...


Details | Ekphrasis (Ecphrasis) | |

A Depiction Of One Artist And His Starry Night



Vincent Van Gogh~Starry Night __________________________ a precarious world of indecision a dark pallet of light this brilliant depiction , it does scream , it cries out blues and yellows swirl in a maze of defeat a crescent moon suspended in a blissful evening , hangs lone in agony I rest within this small town of hope my eyes are saddened , my mind relentless in delight You are mine , my asylum , my starry night a dimension of light under this wrenching canopy of demise oh Vincent... __________________________


Details | Free verse | |

'Memories'



Across a noisy plane Where crowds gather You can hear their chatter and laughter I can still hear your heart beating Even though we are past that stage Of breathing because we have to The only thing I feel is you The only thing you feel is me It is more a case of it is the only feeling That keeps us going In anarchy and confusion This makes sense Feeling you Breathing you Even if it’s only through memories They sometimes talk the loudest
©300520121315


Details | Rhyme | |

The Best Mistake

You made the mistake and now,
your afraid to face this day. 

Your thoughts are racing through 
and through.

You wonder if your family looks at
you as a disgrace, but you'er mother
takes you and reasures, your very 
much loved in grace.

Even though your much to young
for this breathing little thing this
has become.

You couldn't just throw it out
like it was a peice of trash.

So you grow up and take the
path that led you to your best
mistake for years to come.


Details | Blank verse | |

SWIMMING UPSTREAM

SWIMMING UPSTREAM

It seems I always 
swim upstream 
against the current.
re-creating struggles 
of conflicting contradictions
and unsweetened scripts
at odds with others
in deeds and words
a emotional dissonance 
played out over a lifetime. 
banged and buffered hard
against the onflow;
prevailing opposites rush
to assail my efforts
intent on wearing me down
scraping, scarring, challenging
calling me out with
harsh ridicule and doubt
  
why must I cause stirred sediments 
to muddy, blind and bewilder me
blurring reason so that
what is seen as truth 
often becomes mixed
with drama and ambivalence? 
 
how righteous is the direction
of this timeless stream?
shall I swim with it or against it?
go one way or the other;
does it really matter?

I cannot give up
I cannot relent...
this is who I am
a person searching
for kindred spirits
to swim backward 
with me
against the current.
to find some direction,
some marker that guides
this hurrier to a another plane
of purposeful existence.

SYNOPSIS 

I think most people at some time are contrarian.
Some from the start; others in their teens.
Some all through their life.
I can't remember being otherwise.
In retrospect, am I really that different
or do I use it an excuse
to be noticed?  Perhaps both. 


CAK 10-13-12013


Details | Rhyme | |

Remnants

Sad Heart, now thou art wither’d from the Sun,
What man, or god, will near thee run?
Wrought in twist like branches in Tempests' gasp,
What Comfort, or Gauze, shall be near to grasp?
True ones begotten are the ones now Rotten
And the ones now Rotten will never be forgotten
They are merely sad remains of assiduous Tears
That have been meddl’d with and tatter’d Raw throughout the years

And thou, cruel Mind, that sat’st still thru toiling trail of Night;
Must dream your broken Dreams; thou’rt a sanely flight!
Can thou extinguish passions of Fire, Disease, or Rain?
—tho thy distinguish’d influence trains to abstain
Thy Remnants brought to debris in thy Empty street,
Devour’d by Vultures, their bestow’d beaks entreat
Merely are they cleaning an inexhaustible Mess
Alas! Leaving thy rudiments of Identity to redress....



Details | Rhyme | |

What We Had Was Only a Tale

Here’s to a love that never existed!
And to the departing you insisted,
Let me give in to all I’ve resisted
It is true through our frivolous trail
Our lives were but a tale;
Though if I hadn’t thought of it
Pure hearts indefinite,
Not mattering even then,
Would I ever believe again?
We never win, we never fail
For what we had was only a tale

I’m lost within a dream never dreamt
Inside a slumber never slept,
And I caress the intricate design
Of the world I can never find
How vast! Yet still it is dying
Fading into the nadirs’ binding
As I fill the world with crying—always crying! 
Oh world! Can I ever bring myself to hold 
The warm nothing growing cold? 
Oh world! Can I not take away
The love I gave with my will today?
We never win, we never fail
For what we had was only a tale 


Details | Rhyme | |

Destiny's Ecstasy

You may find destiny's ecstasy, that you searched for all your days Cut free from your bonds of sorrow,and sadness burnt up in a blaze For when the ashes and fog arise,happiness reveals its ways The familiar face in the mirror, will be happy with your gaze To stay on course in life you must keep the right frame of mind Think not only of yourself but of the others you may find Look at yourself as a stranger that you've met for the very first time Notice the sadness,and sorrow that you keep hidden away inside Hard enough as it is, you've got to just pull yourself upright For some circumstances in daily life, are hard to see in light Sometimes you have to look into a mirror,and focus with all your might To see what you may find hidden within,takes so much more than sight
*Collab with Dan Kearley <3 Thanks for the opportunity, Dan! 8) Twas fun..*


Details | Free verse | |

The Day That Died Forever

When I am Colder,Older and then alone...
I will collect the sky on my own...
When the art has faded and the days then fade-
when everyone has gone away...

I may finally see what never was saw
.....ahhhhhhhhhhhhh............... the quiet sky

The unlit room which bares my end...shows the flashes of my pains my joys and sins.
This life has been a strange one since the curtains were drawn
These paper and plastic figures have clouded the dawn

I was once younger,foolish,and obsessed with truth
Now I am bitter,sour,dour faced with my heart under shoe

The children were all searching or lost in a crowd
All weeds in a garden...growing vile and foul

Though beauty was sold it never came true
Obsessions and vanity have traveled safe through

Materials and poison and everything lost
have been burned in the fires or lost in the frost

I stand face to mirror tearing my being apart
Winding thoughts of love,pain,god,and art

As the sun sets and the darkness grows
I too shall follow this pattern in tow

Death has a friendly hand and a pretty face
She has given me comfort as I leave this place

The wars have occurred,humanity's lost
Souls have been burnt in the fire or lost in the frost

Day was Life,Night is Death

And the latter has given counsel on my final steps


Details | Free verse | |

Two Days Ahead

I must try and lead my dreams,
to where the lost and unforgiving answers,
rejuvenate their circle.

Two days, have somehow passed
and my eyes are half empty.

I still need to sleep.

Two days, ahead now
and my eyes are half full.

Hence, the satirical tear shed,
to hypothetically cleanse....

absolutely nothing.


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Me

Dear Me,

I need you to be stronger
I need you to never be afraid

swallow your pride,and your flight will be softer
tell her you love her,even if it hurts

Grab onto your dream and live it
Do not be afraid of the sun's divinity

Be better,love more, hold on.

Dear Me,

Enjoy every stop of the ride.
For when the train finally stops...we die

Until we witness the angels dance after final day...
Dear Me, hide your fears away


Details | Rhyme | |

If Loving You Were Easy

If loving you were easy
I'd love you like I should.
I've opened up my heart to you
and tried as best I could.
I don't expect reassurance.
I know some think I'm cold.
I needed your love when I was young.
But now I'm just too old.
I've lived without your guidance.
I've lived without your hugs.
I'm sure you don't remember
a time without your drugs.
You chose the life you're living.
I wished you all the best.
Now it's time to say goodbye
and lay this thing to rest.
If loving you were easy,
I'd love you like I should.
I've opened up my heart to you
and tried as best I could.


Details | Rhyme | |

The thoughts of a bi-polar

Who am I and what am I to say?,
All I've got to do is play,
Along in a game I don't understand,
Make people come to my land,
A deal that you don't think about,
Something thats going to start out,
A trend that will last for years,
Making people come to tears,
Arguing points that don't get across,
Having to deal with a great loss,
This is my life and these are my words,
Circling around like I'm in herds,
Playing games with my head,
Maybe I would be better off dead.


Details | Quatrain | |

You make me feel numb

I do believe in magic
I so believe in peace
I believe you know undoubtedly
Of beauties and of beasts
The human spirit can withstand
And rise above the shrine
Belittle all you want, my dear
I’ll be the dwarf in time
But I’ll evolve as I hold dear
These sentiments that haunt you
I’ll cherish every single tear
Because you’ve plagued me to
I’ll turn the other rosy cheek
Though undeserved it may be
I will forgive, but won’t forget
The promised growth inspired in me
Further more, I wish to say
Remind me that I’m still alive
Disturb the sleeping monsters 
Please provoke me to survive
You compliment this hypocrite
Attention seeking scum
And help stick out the finger
That outranks the sorest thumb


Details | Rhyme | |

Maybe it's Time

Maybe it's time we said a prayer
Maybe it's time we started to care
Maybe it's time we started looking for the truth.

Maybe it's time we began to listen
Maybe it's time we completed our mission
Maybe it's time we began to teach our youth.

Maybe it's time we ended the violence
Maybe it's time we broke the silence
Maybe it's time we eliminated the fears,

Maybe it's time we minded our business
Maybe it's time we showed forgiveness
Maybe it's time we stopped the flow of tears.

Maybe it's time we saw our brother
Maybe it's time we loved one another 
Maybe it's time we wished upon that distant star.

Maybe it's time we answered the call
Maybe it's time we stood proud and tall
Maybe it's time we accepted people as they are.

Maybe it's time we stood up and screamed
Maybe it's time we lied down and dreamed
Maybe it's time we enjoyed the fruits of our labor.

Maybe it's time we showed some remorse
Maybe it's time we set a new course
Maybe it's time we acted like a neighbor.

Maybe it's time we forgot the sorrow
Maybe it's time we planned for tomorrow
Maybe it's time we looked for a Resurrection.

Maybe it's time we had a little fun
Maybe it's time we walked in the sun
Maybe it's time we headed in a different direction.


Details | Rhyme | |

Silenced by Anger

Silenced by anger,
I can’t believe my ears,
you told me that you loved me,
but the truth remains clear.

You lied to me, you selfish jerk,
and it is I, who must pay
for all the love and laughter,
that left me in a daze.

I can’t believe that I listened
to the words that you said.
The truth wasn’t missing,
it was dancing in my head.

You used to act like you loved me,
But I guess the angers fed.
So forgive me as I leave this place,
Selfish, cold, and dead.


Details | I do not know? | |

Mistake

I’m six feet below the ground; where I sleep
My body stopped moving and I can’t breathe
A little air, I think, is all I need
But I’m trapped underground and I can’t see
It’s so dark and what was that, did someone knock?
No, just someone walking over this place that I rot
I wish I could scream, I wish somebody would talk to me
Was it a mistake to take my life of disbelief?
I just wanted someone to take away the monotony
All the darkness in my life I thought everything was a lie
I tried to show someone how I felt inside
And then I ended it...well at least I tried
But even in death, I just wish I would die…


Details | I do not know? | |

Bulimia

What started as a few times has
now turned into a habit hard to break
Everyone is now starting to see
no matter how hard I try to hide it or 
how hard I try to fake

I've tried to hide it from everyone
including my own family
I guess in fear they would think I 
was stupid or maybe even deny me

What started this issue this problem 
this disease
Knowing I will never look like the girls
on tv or the cover of magizines

Knowing when I see my reflection
I'm the furthest thing from them
From what everyone wants
what seem like "perfection"

How can I ever truly be happy with me
knowing like them I will never be
What sets us so far apart from one another
ask yourself or you will end up just like me 
all alone all by yourself

someone so miserable in this life no matter
what I try and do
Seems no matter what happens I always end
up the fool

See everytime I think I found someone that is
different I seem to find out it's not true
No man can ever only see his real love
no man can ever stay completly true

Every man has got wandering eyes
any man to tell you different is just another
man full of lies

Bulima I have learned is a mental illness a
mental disease I know sounds sick to most
Be glad this is not one of your demons to 
fight - one of your ghost


Details | Name | |

Handling Reality

Reliving painful moments every single day
Envying other's fortune
Always wanting the love of another
Loving people who will never care
Inviting things into your life that you can't handle
Trying to forgive while dealing with more pain
Yearning for the perfect life that no one will ever have


Details | Free verse | |

Let's Drive, Shall We?

There are different levels of truth
I climb
   Staircases 
	That 
	       Go
	            Far
                                      Beyond
		                         Comprehension
Reality is made of thoughts
Spiraling and humming 
Like they are something
But in the end
They are all just ideas
Driving to nowhere except 
Waiting to be found and
Put into motion
Heights of control
Shift to third and go above
Everyone is an enigma 
I fall in affection 
constantly
With myself
Metamorphosing

Who am I to ask of perfection?
I is always capitalized
but what if
i is i and we are we, and he, we together
make something different, completely?

Manufacturing lines put together
Vehicles that take soul imprinted notions
on midnight drives by the avenue
Sell them to the Lord, to the Devil
'Tis all the same
For goodness sake, heaven is simply
What we make it


Details | Verse | |

This Place

In the cold depths of my barren soul,
I lay here slowly dying,
A very sad sight for one to behold,
The doctor just sits there with cold eyes and judging stares,
Oh god I'd wish he'd just say something,
That way ill know that he's really there.
My world is much different than your world,
You just couldn't possibly understand,
With stares of disgust, pointing fingers unjust,
My lifes in the hands of this man.
All these pills I must take,
To make the voices go away,
These pills they don't work,
I think im  going insane.
Silently, numbly drifting,
Drifting away to this place,
The look of utter horror,
Was the look you had on your face ,
This place is a good place, a safe place for me,
You chose it don't you remember?
A place were you cant bear to be.


Details | Free verse | |

Betting on Nothing

By committing to nothing, one retains infinite options.
I have hid inside these words for moons and seasons and New Year’s toasts.
The lone wolf roams fertile pastures unfettered.
The thrill of the hunt.
The chase.
An empty bed is the hope of a new body’s sleeping curve.
Tomorrow becomes yesterday.
“The mystery of mysteries is the gateway to marvels.”
I stopped looking long ago.

The faces have blurred into a montage of emptiness.
Come and go; came and went.
I never bothered much to be bothered.
There aren’t many memories
And I am thankful for that.
Wet fingers and licked lips’
Blood on my hands.
Wasted time.
The years run on like a favorite sitcom gone bad.
It all should have been retired years ago.

It is easier to stay afloat and roam the big waters alone
Than set up camp on an island and face a face.
No problems.
No worries.
No connection.
Freedom is all that you cannot commit to
And who surrenders to nothing is he who lives in frigid shadows of fear.
Maybe I have never truly known warmth.

I walk the streets like a war-worn shoulder.
A little cold, a little distant, a little too silent.
The words I have are recycled fragments of someone else’s life.
I don’t offer much.
Poker face.
Can you read my concrete stare?
I have an entire universe hiding in my back pocket
But I’m scared to show you.
It’s been so long since I groped or even fondled my own life.
I’m not sure what I do or don’t have to offer.
I just keep making bets and upping the ante.


Details | Free verse | |

Is it a dream?

In my minds eyes
My enemies are my friends
and my "Friends" 
that helped me in the beginning 
might soon be the cause of my ends.
In my minds eyes 
I try to be the sunlight 
during my loved ones rain
Thinking I'm the joy
But in reality 
I'm the pain
In my minds eye
Am I the reason you failed
life's test cuz I didnt teach you
Or help guide you enough like the rest?
In my minds eyes
Did I only dirty your soul
more and make it rough
When I thought I was cleaning you
by showering you with my love?
In my minds eye
I'm rich in live but poor in spirit
Let me mess up just once
Just like "CNN" every hour on the hour
I'm guaranteed to hear it
If this is a dream
I'm ready to wake up
Somebody please ring the alarm.


Details | Quatrain | |

My Torment

A fleeting still small voice tries to warn me
A sudden overwhelming desire to run
The tell tale taste of metallic flakes
Means my nightmare has begun

Everything around takes on a ghostly pallor
A landscape of anguish and corrosion
A moment of silence before the violence
The flash of light, the brilliant explosion

The sound of the Sun fills my ears
Fear, my throat, though none escapes me
And paralyzed I clench my eyes
As my tormentor prepares to rape me

And it's endeavor is absolute
Consumption is its ultimate goal
It exists to chase me so it can erase me
Whilst feasting on my soul

And then that familiar salty smell 
The sudden rush of warmth so stings
Engaging me relentlessly
In vile unspeakable things

Over and over and over again
My limbs stretched and wrought
As it's teeth tear my bones bare
It's mind defiles my thoughts

And still wounds beget wounds beget wounds
As in the mouth of madness I suffer
And with every injury he just seems to be
Rougher and rougher and rougher

Then just as suddenly as it began it ceases
And for a moment I am clearer
And then the true horror of it all
Is revealed in a darkly lit mirror

There in front of me stands my destroyer
Face flush with it's fill of my pain
And I find that it's eyes and mine
My God, they’re one in the same


Details | Rhyme | |

Sickness in my Soul

 I’m in such a state of confusion,
I don’t understand what I’m doing
I know your there
And I know you care
But I can’t see you
I can’t hear you
I just don’t know what to do
I know your there in the stillness,
Waiting to heal this illness
 
There is a deep hole
A sickness in my soul,
Disease in the depths of my heart
 But How to fix it
I wouldn't know where to start
How it came to be
Is a deep mystery to me
 
 I know that I am broken
We all are in some way
But rarely are these things spoken
Rarely do I have the courage to say
The secrets kept within
The depths of my sin
 
But if I hide it how can it be healed
 How can the healer heal?
If I keep my heart sealed
What if I let down my shield?
 
Will I be attacked or disgraced
Or will I be embraced
I’m too scared to find out
To be found out
So I hide my face
 
I only let people see part of me
I only let people get so close
I don’t want them to see
I don’t want them to know
And so I end up alone
 
I’ve been to the bar, the clubs,
All the social hubs
But no one cares about my hurts
 Life’s all about chasing skirts,
Fancy cars and nice shirts
 
Or is there something beyond drunken nights, and flashing lights
Is there something really worth living for, an open door to something more?
An invitation to a new destination
A path to peace, a sweet release
A new life to claim, an escape from the shame
I believe there is, some days I forget
But my life isn’t over yet
 
Tomorrow is a new day
I can live life your way
With love and peace
With guilt and shame released
With a new heart
And a new start
A reason to live
And something to give
To this broken earth
Of invaluable worth
 
At my very core
I know I was born for more
Than to live and to die
Without knowing why
I don’t have it all figured out
But I know without a doubt
That the world needs love
And that love comes from above
Because human love is not enough
 
That is why there is a deep hole
And a sickness in my soul
But to me has been revealed
The way to be healed
 
Now I have a mission
A reason for existence
To bring healing to the earth
To the unloved, the broken, the rejected
And tell them what they are worth
So that Jesus’ love will be reflected
And this love will give birth
To many people being resurrected,
Redirected and completely accepted
To a wonderful and glorious rebirth


Details | Etheree | |

Cash Gone in Tax

Cash
Slashed by
Uncle Sam
Hard earned wages
Burned as income tax
Cash gone like blowing wind
Tax is not like sweet vermouth
This is just like pulling hen’s tooth
Tax going up, paycheck going down
Tax man leave us alone—we need a break!

~~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~~

Won Honorable Mention
Etheree Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Andrea Dietirch
June 20, 2010

~~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~~


Details | Sestina | |

Gift

The day’s beginning is a special gift.
Given over a life’s eternity,
One can’t help but feel the daily change.
How often we stay into the evening.  An attempt to hold
Onto the feelings of joy and elation,
That made our day so emphatically special.

Are not the future possibilities also special?
That we dream of yet other gifts,
gifts  of such thought, that might also inspire elation
From giver and receiver for all eternity.
Constantly close to both, holding,
As if to say, “Don’t Ever Change.”

Does growth not require change?
Should not that change be also special?
Only if you have forgotten about holding,
The longing embrace of previous gifts,
One that requires attention for all eternity,
fueling existential feelings of elation.

Even when intentionally forgotten, holding
On to the recipient, despite elation.
At one point, this internal agony was a gift.
What could ever make this change?
This gift that could never be more special.
Now it has changed for eternity.

The re-direct of energy through eternity,
The loss of love’s forever embrace.
Love, making pain beautifully special.
Will there ever be elation?
Maybe if we only change
The way we exchange special gifts.

Our future’s eternity might fill with elation
From  holding the exchange
Of something special,
… the mere appreciation of a gift..


Details | Free verse | |

Worst Love Poem Ever Written

I suck at dying poems
Chemo poems, Metastatic Cancer poems,
Hair falling out in the shower poems
 
And I told a half truth
When I told you I could write you one
In less than six months (It's been eight)
I apologize for being so late

 
I wanted your poem to be pink and graceful
Like those ribbons
I see all over the internet
Filled with cheesy generic rhymes
That read like a Hallmark audition

  But already my metaphors are melting
And my similes are getting soft
 I guarantee you the rhyme meter will be off

 When I went to Google
And the typed in the word 'happy'
Three billion links came up

Not a single inference to
Breast cancer, hair loss
No redirects to mastectomies
Yahoo wasn't any kinder

 
The only thing research could teach me
Is that a good day on chemo
Is when your stool doesn't come out tar Black
And has no blood in it

Or when your urine
Smells better on Wednesday
Than it did on Tuesday

Sleeping less than 12 hours
When 24 would be better

  
America has more poets
Than it does alcoholics
   And Pot smokers combined
And you chose me to be
Your Breast Cancer
Poet Laureate

Trusting me to write a poem
About the biggest battle in your life

So I refuse to finish this poem
Without something bright and hopeful
 
And don't think
I didn't notice your Facebook activity
Had decreased by 88%
In the last three months

 
And you aren't really
Coming to any more of my poetry shows
Ever again. Are you??
But we still have March, April
Don't we?

 
But even if you had one breast
Or no breast

Or if you had less hair than I do
I promise to look only in your eyes
And never ever even notice
Or even think about it

And never for a moment
Would I feel sorry for you

Yes I suck at lying too...

 
But I don't suck at loving you
Or at hoping you wake up tomorrow morning
 With no Cancer at all
And that The Eiffel Tower will be right outside
Your bedroom window...

And I would be right there with you
Holding your hand while we look down on Paris
And you can impress me with your French again

 
And if I ever make it
To the Pulitzer Poetry board
I might lose a thousand points
Just for this poem alone

And my hopes for the prize will be smitten
And some old person 
With white hair will say
That was the worst love poem ever written


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Lyric | |

Pins and Needles

Another song written in middle school - edited of course. ;)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Verse 1] I'm trapped within these walls Never to leave at all I am the prisoner inside my own home My spirit is broken I do not believe I'm locked in this chamber which I cannot leave [Chorus] The needles that break the skin The anger that runs within I’m giving it all away Just to stay alive The needles that pierce my veins It will never be the same We’re on pins and needles now It’s how we survive [Verse 2] They say he’ll find me soon Got to get out of this room The blood will spill and he’ll take what he wants to I’ll never let him through GET OUT OF MY DREAM He whispers in darkness, “I’m not who I seem…” [Chorus] [Verse 3] The four walls around me They start to close in I know I’m too late now I know I can’t win So just tell me I’m crazy It’s all in my head You’re not the killer And I am not dead [Chorus] [Breakthrough] Don’t tell me it’s impossible To start it all over again Infection sinks through your pale skin You’ll curse the day that I’m dead [Chorus]


Details | Free verse | |

Senility

The rainbow of reason ends
With a pot of gold and jabberwocky.
When hippocampus dwells in solitary,
       silent,
              eerie,
                    forgotten dormitories
of the expatriated mind.


In planned visits 
To familiar spaces,
When elapsed faces are still hailed with fervor, 
         and hasty,		
                 eager,
                      vivid candor,
As though they had never gone.


Deep in thought
In cavernous bowels tangled lost, 
Remote repartees recurring restlessly. 
          Cautious,
                      wary,
  	                    and ever leery	
of echoing footsteps anxiously nearing, as though someone might overhear. 


As even eyes fail to mirror
The twilight of past vigor,
Speaking in feeble voices muddled beneath walls,
            beneath walls,
	           beneath walls,
	                     beneath walls.
Walking politely in ancient, and empty, imaginary halls.


The stars stop still and unfleeting
Listening to last breaths, and the heart’s last beating,
To hearken timid last words from the past's last illusions,
            past apparitions,
                         past veritas
                                   past delusions,
Where celestial alae still go a-flutter with lost aspirations.


When the frail hand that once held and sheltered
Cannot even rattle dandelion clocks,
Or crush delicate imago wings into dust,
          and caress, 
                  and feel,
                           and touch, 
Save for Elysian veldts
Where the rainbow of reason ends.



Details | Free verse | |

I Do Believe

"I Do Believe" 

The purpose of LIFE is to {Living In Faith Ever} 
to enrich God within us 
to an optimum level 
so that We as Humans 
can be guided by God 
to fuel out brothers and sisters 
with the same driving force 
to connect with the living God, 
to His existence and 
to See the Invisible, 
Believe the Incredible, and 
to Receive the Impossible 
to our everlasting journey 
to Heaven.

Rev. Samuel Mack
Copyright 2013

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Narrative | |

Alone in a Hospital Room - An Alzheimer's Song

Don’t you remember, love, how we danced that first night;
beneath the sun’s rays, toes dipping in the cooling sand, 
to the tune of our favorite song –
with me humming the best I could – 
(I sounded terrible, but you told me I sounded divine, remember?)
while falling all over myself, and your delicate feet; 
and you, trying so hard not to laugh as I made such a fool of myself!
Did you ever think we would go 
from being love-sick teenagers dancing on the beach, 
to a couple of old-timers reminiscing 
about our best years – our long ago days together? 

Honey? 
Sweetheart, please…
If there is any part of that teenage girl 
left within that beautiful head of yours…please; 
please, just look in my eyes as you once did…
look at me, sweetheart…
Don’t you remember? 

My love, do you hear? 
They’re playing our favorite song…



*Inspired by Izzy Gumbo's Solfege Contest
I really hope I did this right! :)


Details | Rhyme | |

The Hypocritical Christian

I am the hypocritical Christian.
I say I follow Christ,
But I'm still consumed by my demons.
I go to church on Sunday,
But I refuse to invite someone back.
I want to serve on mission,
But I'm too afraid to act.
They think I read The Bible,
But I just fall asleep in it.
They think I'm positivity and smiles,
But underneath I'm death and addictions.
They think I'm clean and pure,
But I'm broken and mistaken.
I say I'm not worthy of His love,
But Jesus will never let me be forsaken.
I pray long prayers,
But inside they're empty repetition.
It might look as if my faith is strong,
But my core is too easily shaken.
I say the things I'm supposed to say,
But don't follow His actions or obey.
I speak the truth the church wants to hear,
But deep inside on matters I don't know what to believe.
I walk in shame as if I'm not good enough
To be loved by God and saved through Christ,
But there is nothing I could ever do to earn His peace;
It's a free gift.
I accept;
Now forgiven, changed, and released.
Thank You God,
Thank You Jesus,
Thank You Holy Spirit!
In Jesus' Holy Name,
We pray,
Amen!


Details | Sestina | |

MIRACLE AT DAWN

No mother would fill up her eyes with tears of woman...
if it weren't for God performing a miracle at dawn,
as she cried out in joy and held her baby in trembling arms
but shed many sweet tears hearing his laughter so loud;
oh, he couldn't see her mommy's face through his tiny eyes,
and it will be long before he'll will utter the first word, " Mom." 

Now that baby sleeps under the attentive look of his mom,
who's too young to become a mature woman;
many visions of this birth crossed her gleeful eyes
she dreamed of the very same words whispered at each dawn,
repeating them in her silly head as if they sounded too loud...
while cradling a pretty doll in her folded arms.

Will she be welcomed home by her parents opening their arms?
Will they reprimand her and not consider her a legal mom?
Perhaps they will not be angry and speak not so loud:
girls are supposed to be girls, not suddenly turn into woman...
So this innocent girl, deceived by a bad boy, must wake up at dawn
when her baby cries and feed him with scary, childish eyes?

Nights seem longer for her, trying to stay awake rubbing her eyes,
what she beheld in those exciting eyes, now it's a burden in her weary arms;
she remembers that pain was too unbearable, but joy more sublime at dawn...
how will she learn how to care for the infant by watching her mom?
She must have seen a nursery or read a book how to think like a real woman,
and can anyone imagine how she keeps that secret instead of revealing it loud?

She must gather enough courage inside to feed her baby who can't cry loud,
but for now she must carry that baby without sighs of distress into her bright eyes;
and her parents can see the changes making her a loving person already woman;
they may ask questions to why she has gained weight and holds dolls in her arms...
no, they aren't anticipating great news and in doubt, they await a splendid dawn.

Mother and daughter closely together amazed by the coming dawn,
any concealed secret can be easily spoken...somewhat joyful and loud;
they imagine the infant's futures will be part of grandma and mom!
Their reunited hearts come together to show love in their delighted eyes,
and they'll take turns feeding the new-born, tenderly lulling him in their arms;
what if forgiveness hadn't been there to deny her all of the joys of woman?

Would a mother deny her daughter compassion as a good woman?
Even God hurried dawn to offer that gift into her gracious, tender arms...
and those arms accepted it with the gentleness and kindness of mom.




Details | Acrostic | |

Seed Of Friendship-A dedication

L-iving in a world of vast 
souls formed from 
another voided world,
E-ntering thru portals 
from their world to earth.
O-ozing spetacular smell 
and wail when the chips 
are down.
N-urtured from cradle to 
adulthood-independent
entity with a new world 
to face.
O-rganizes oneself for the 
task ahead,passing thru 
hurdles of life unabased 
and unabashed.
R-eaps the fruit of labor 
with joy or heavy heart.
A-ge sets in,mission 
accomplished or not will 
dawn on the entity.

I-n retrospect,he thinks 
about his childhood and 
how life was to him.

L-iving in confidence or 
shame,he bows his head 
in victory or defeat.
O-nly the taste of time 
will tell the durability of 
his achievements.
V-oid of preference the 
aim result bears the 
foundation for his lineage.
E-njoyment or lack lies 
with the works of the 
man,for there is no food 
for the slothful.

Y-oung ones,a stitch in 
time saves nine,make 
haste while the sun 
shines.
O-iling your lamb always 
like the ten virgins is the 
key to success.
U-rging you to shun peer 
pressure and focus on 
the course marked out 
for you by fate,so a 
fulfilled life you shall live.





An acrostic for you 
Leonora Galinita.


Details | Free verse | |

It Can't Be Real

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind
For it is only an offense given to me by myself
In the mouths of others far innocent than I
I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks
For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake
I am always inadequate in this brain
I try to shine like the advice of grace given
But confidence rarely rears its head my way
There’s a sort of shade blocking its way
A shade that darkens everyday

That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong
That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled
I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold
I hate myself truly this night
And no one but myself will give me the right
The very right to degrade my every being
Because you are not seeing what I am seeing

There is no point
My lines run cold
Can I be so bold as to say
I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt 
All feelings enter in
As my truth blurs and checks out

Your words pierce me so deep
I cannot describe the pain I feel
God it hurts so bad
It can’t be real

Much like the love I have come to embrace
The very love that links to your face
Tears don’t give it justice

It can’t be real
Much like the love I will never face


Details | Alliteration | |

Roundhouse Runs

Black squirrels bound skewways
from the house, shadowshifts
falling darkly on 
dusty white autumnal
snow. Paw prints run

makeshift memories soon 
snowed over. Leaping
on tree trunks they wind their
way upward on paths of birch
bark in quick roundhouse runs.

I watch them go from
a seat by the door
and eavesdrop on the
dripping eaves trough. Icicles
hang like stalactites
and
drip
their
dew
onto
the
driveway.

The heater blows dry
air over my face as
dust rides recirculated
draft flows and floats upward
in a beam of magnetic

light. A thin frosting
of human sloughcells
settles on the windowsill
in a regiment I
attack with the duster

before they regroup and
resettle. Single cells
born of a single self. I 
pace circles on the
fading cream carpet.


Details | Narrative | |

The Empty Tissue Box

My heart was in such pain
I felt like I was going to go insane
I just don't know what to do 
And my eyes full of tears that distort my view

I fell to my knees and felt the urge
My muscle tighten and pin needles struck me like a surge
My body was warm and with feelings so confused
My mind felt sadness had fused

I could not conquer my fears
I just sat down and fell into tears
When some close to you passes on
It felt like a warmth has gone

So I raised my hand towards a box that was empty with no tissue
I first was embarrass and had a little bit of issue
All my friends hugged me and said sorry for your loss
So now I cry in my bed and toss


April 14, 2013


Details | I do not know? | |

Still In Progress

How can I be selfless without being used? 
How can I be demanding without being so rude? 
How can I open up without closing back down? 
How can I speak if you don't hear a sound? 
How can I trust without being betrayed? 
Yet how could I leave... even after you stayed? 
But how can you love me when I won't let you in? 
So many questions.... where do I begin? 
-------- 
Memories now blurred, flying through my mind…… 
Now, I’m trying to repress the days of being youthful and blind. 
Every morning I pull on my armor, right from within, 
Preparing for a war, that I intend, to win. 
If my heart is my comrade and my mind is the enemy, 
Then in the midst of this battlefield, 
Life is the remedy…
 --- 
Trying to stay sane, knowing that although this is temporary, nothing is vain… 
Learning that there is always a purpose and people will try to corrupt us, and bring you great shame… 
Being told that ‘Victory isn't given to he who starts the race the strongest, but he who endures until the end.’ 
Trying to suspend you from learning to depend... on yourself, 
instead making you depend on the wealth, 
Of someone who doesn't even know who he is, 
while you’re grasping the stealth of your true identity, in your right hand, in your heart, the knowledge…
Never been withheld 
… 
.. 
. 
Feeling the world come crashing down on you, compacting into a mist of air so cool, 
The breeze passing right through, right into the depths of your pores, to ensue, 
The burning and broken and fragile pieces of the inhabitants of the earth from your birth til' now.. 
Physically becoming everything that you breathe, touch, conceive, munch, perceive, every aroma... 
And every great or insignificant trauma, reflecting off your skin oh so temporarily, the mark so paper thin… 
Physically, THAT is what you are… 
Because we only see the physical, right? 
Yet, behind every movie is there not a director… a cast? 
And behind every painting is there not an artist, combining colors and lines so vast? 
And behind every child is there not a journey, a past? 
...
That you did not walk, yet you know that it’s there, not by sight, scent, taste, touch, or hearing... But something inside you, that says it makes sense, KNOWS that all of that is there, 
KNOWING
...
..
.


Details | Free verse | |

Tension Waiting

The swordsman who draws his blade
Heart racing at the keening of steel on scabbard 
Tension coiled, poised for the unleashing
Held back by muscles tight with glee.

I am as the soldier, held in stance,
The lioness crouched beneath the concealing grass
As it sways back and forth, as insects sing along the day
Her every breath is halted, her veins do not pulse,
And just as the swordsman stands
They are statues in this moment,
Statues of derision,
Mocking, with their stillness, the very charged tension within.

And I am as the lioness frozen before her pounce
Coiled with motivation and purpose,
And I am as the tongue held with words clinging off its’ edge
Ready to lash out and strike with direction
But I am as the frozen purpose, held tight
Waiting, for a warrior to stand before me
For a reason to uncoil, to lash out with words and pounce.

But I am now as the pen halting before the purest of paper
White and supple, in askance for the lightest touch
A slash of the tip, drawing lines in ink
Lines like a hunter’s bowstring, taut with intent,

As the pen lies frozen above its prey, the falcon petrified aloft still winds
I am the need coiled tight like a wound jack in the box
But alas, there is no victim to frighten,
No pray to pounce upon, no sword or bared neck to slash against
And I am here, with pen frozen, ink ready to be drawn taut
And I have nothing to draw in the ink, no prey or purpose to evoke
I am coiled tight with energy, but it is release that so eludes me,
I am coiled tight with purpose, but it is direction that so denies me.

And here I am, pouncing at ground before me, 
Slicing away at the air around me
Scratching away with a dry pen, on paper still white in askance
I write about…
I write about the coil within, and the lack without
And alone I wonder,
Is it enough, is it enough to go on, a wound up box
Waiting for the slightest touch, the weakest parry, to live.


Details | Free verse | |

Voiceless

Misunderstood, trapped and rarely
considered an equal; confusion
dominates many faces that try to
comprehend my broken voice.
No-one seems to recognise my
body language and unusual hand movements.
Wrong conclusions are drawn towards
my level of intelligence; many view me
like a lost child desperate to be one with
its mother.
I may speak the English language but
it appears broken; my voice is thus 
lost, like a treasured belonging long 
been misplaced somewhere unknown.
My hearing remains but I speak like
a deaf person; hand gestures are made
to try to convey my thoughts and emotions,
sadly, hardly anyone has learned how to
interpret someone like myself.
I am voiceless and thus I seem not to
belong in this world of fragmented images
of what is deemed normal.
Regardless of my affliction I remain as 
whole as I can possibly be.


Details | Rhyme | |

When Sheep Collide

'Tis strange where we should get the notion
That poetry expressed in motion
Should within the human form reside.
When nature gives us many chances
Unpractised and ephemeral dances
Like in a muddy field when sheep collide

Truth is, that nature's not so humble
And doesn't mind the dancer's stumble
There's nothing that it ever seeks to hide
Uncaring it leaves all revealed
And is not shamed if one small field
Has crazy sheep and one long muddy slide

They're mad, they're bad, they're having fun
Those naughty sheep and every one
Is doing what convention has denied
The hillside's muddy, wet and slick
With crazy sheepies sliding quick
Down to the bottom, down where sheep collide.

Many count good nature's fare
The birdsong and the country air
Among the wonders of the countryside
But strange delight can yet be found
In woolly bodies sliding round
A simple muddy field where sheep collide.

While nature guides celestial spheres
In cosmic dances, it appears,
With majesty the earthborn are denied
Down far beneath in mud and grass
A sheep slides on its woolly a***:
A sense of fun, though not a sense of pride.


Details | Free verse | |

Deaf and Gone

I am whatever you say I am...
but, let's get back to reality...

       Three short years ago, this room shined welcome mats across a screen of doldrums.
A place of unfamiliarity that screamed, 
"You don't belong!"
Yet, a voice of reason spoke and said,
"Expand yir' roots. Venture beyond the comfort zone. Academia resides inside that room, but know you won't be alone."
Repeatedly,brainwaves declined what my wife and editor had told me.
I'd say,
"no way, I'm givin' up my soul for free, they read, they pay, like it's always been, the way it's going to always be!"
Unbeknownst to me one day, and with a slight of hand, my "Open Sores" were put on display and surprisingly more than a handful of great ladies and nice guys began to give feedback on what I had devised. 
This interaction was something very new, helpful, and impressive. For a change, it was something real.
For years, those around me were quick to give praise with hidden reasons. Constructive criticism is amazing, and I welcomed being corrected or set straight.
Now there are those who choose to shut me down without explanation, and call me names.
DO NOT mistake me for sophomoric! These words bleeding from my guts have no style and need no approval. There is no thinking involved here, no plan. If you don't like it, fine...don't censor or bracket me in. So what if I am illiterate?  If you don't like "street poetry" or the pathetic stuff I write, don't read it. If I offend you, tell me.
We should welcome those who are different than us. 
Words of truth inspire movement, like fire.
I came to this room to expand my horizons, step outside the box, learn, help, grow. 
There will be no apologies dealt for being different, or for being labelled as something uncomfortable to you. 
This has been an ok room so far, but there is some clique trickanery going on.
If the dictionary must come into play, let me recommend looking up the term "Poetic License."
True, I may not be the writer you prefer, or aspire to be....but tread carefully my friend, for you have no idea of my profession. I've made a fine living, for a good long time, spewing words onto paper. I came from nothing, and may still be nothing to you...still, I do what I love, have no boss.
I am not an aspiring writer who dreams of a life, I live my dream. In conclusion, I must wish you luck in finding what you peddle poetry for. Until then, keep 


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Your King

A burst of white light gamma rays, overbearing a flash of brilliance burns through to my soul everything is like hell the world starts to melt in the blink of an eye just the cold blackness of night I don't care if I am not again what I once was, for at this moment I am greater now than ever before I took the path between teetering, tight roping walking right up to my right divined in my unholy state I thought I told you I am your king still you sit there, hesitating I know you hate me what does that mean? I hate just about everything still I'm chosen I did not wish before now bow down to me refuse me no more for I shall always be your demon until you accept me as your King. I don't even know you though you say we used to be best of friends, you and me the day you ditched me I remember now exactly how it played out back when we were just tiny things even back then I still was King you thought me stupid just a ruse I would laugh inside, you see? not one of you single, mean people ever even knew me in a world, mostly seen to me that is why only I can be your true King and bring forth a new source of light everlasting. As two worlds collide slowly aligned one wrapped in shadows one bathed in white evils swirling in the clouds above I'll always be the king you love to hate or despise as in your blood I thought I told you, I am the one I am the way, the way out shall be shown breathe in my spirit as it carries you away breathe in my faith it shall carry your empty space and deposit you gently on a cloud just enough higher than you've ever dreamed of for I am king now, and your in my hell your in my imagination, I'll just never tell you'll feel as though dreaming, you'll feel now if you try and see you were always found the most shared in the light cast upon me the last bright star in heaven. Denounce my name, if you may One year later, still not afraid A black sheep, a darkened spade That's just life, I'm not right I'm in the wrong, follow along Like a piper, I'll pitch a song Mesmerized, the weak wills sing I thought he told you, he's still our king.


Details | Free verse | |

Perception

To see ourselves as others see us --
unmasked images, through others' eyes --
half-formed caricatures, perhaps --
or mere grotesqueries -- 
barely recognized, telling
what we thought to hide --
we'd label these as skewed
perceptions, not real truth...

But, no matter -- when once
I thought myself unfairly judged
and asked "How so?",
I was reminded of the obvious,
i.e.: all outcomes are determined
by perceived attitudes and actions.
Not truth, but clear perception,
pure appearance, guide others' thoughts
and so create the world we live in.

Thus,  however harsh,
"Perception is reality."


Details | Rhyme | |

The Battle Within

A constant battle rages between my heart and mind.
The stress of my decision the devil himself must have assigned.
"Your health and sanity are in jeopardy" screams my brain.
"Don't dare let him go" shrieks my heart in agonizing pain.  

My heart says:
"He's the one for you, you never felt this way before
You ache when away from him, he's the one that you adore.
Be patient with him for in time he will change his ways
Just remember the good times and how he sets your senses ablaze."

My brain says:
"In the years that you have known him, you haven't seen a change.
He's still insecure and jealous, doesn't that seem a little strange.
He believes what he wants to believe and thinks you are a liar.
You let your self become a target and he does not hesitate to fire." 

My heart says: 
"He's been through a lot, just show him the strength of your love.
One day he realize you stood by him when push came to shove.
What if he is my soul-mate.......is that not worth the fight?
Just follow me, 'your heart' and everything will be all right."

My brain says:
"There should be no shoving, insane questioning and childish games.
He would never hurt you and make you cry if he loves you like he claims.
No matter how much you reassure him, he can't seem to get past his issues
He acts like your judge and jury, you'll be forever crying in wad of tissues. 
 
My heart says:
"But don't you see, I'll be crying anyway, I will be broken and beyond repair.
I promised him that I would never let him go, to give up on love seems so unfair.
People search all their lives for that one special person, I truly believe he's mine!
If we can get beyond this madness I know we can once again be on cloud nine."

My brain says:
"Then buck up, stop your tears and for my sanity don't take any more crap.
You're too damn soft hearted, stop letting yourself fall into a turbulent emotional trap.
Life is too short to be unhappy even for a day, I know on this point we both agree.
Just continue to give your all and try your best......... what will be, will be!


"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead." ~Adele~


Details | Rhyme | |

Life Today

I just don't understand what is happening these days
Life has us turned around in so many ways
Was it like this when I was small?
Or does it happen when you grow tall?

Is it the phones and computers that run our life?
That lead us each day to this world of strife.
Wasn't it easier way back when
Do you remember writing with a pen?

Kids shooting kids at school
Isn't school a learning tool?
Bullying is also the trend
Whatever happened to being a friend?

Maybe if we went back to simpler times
There wouldn't be so much crime
Maybe if the drugs went away
More kids would come out to play.

I know I'm just as guilty as all the rest
Being without my phone would be a test
Is there a right answer, I think not
But maybe, just maybe food for thought.


Details | Free verse | |

Your pain

Your pain Why do I feel your pain still When I left of my own free will My mind is heavy with the burdens you build Yet my heart is still tender And vulnerable to your every will When you’re hurting and making bad choices Your voice still touches my every emotion How is it that I still feel your pain Even when I have nothing left to gain Yes, I love you still But be with you, I never, ever will. You had my heart from the very start And slowly our love began to part Two became one, until one was none Off in separate ways for more than 365 days So how is it that to this day Your pain still finds its way Into my life and in my heart where it stays Lay


Details | Free verse | |

My Emily

She never did come back home that night
Me pacing the floor
Walking for miles in search of her
Leaving me torn apart
Spewing with the turmoil of wondering
Just what happened to her
Who had she been with and why?
Engraved on to my mind
her name
etched in my heart
her love, her sighs
Spiking my tongue
her name cries out
My heart splinters
my gut receives another jolt
God I loved that girl
and didn't even know for certain until today
But now it is too late
I left it too long
to proclaim my love for her
afraid of the pain 
which comes from being knocked back
still even that is not as I suffer now
in the whispering of her name
I look in the mirror 
yet see her reflection stare back at me
smiling and tossing back her flowing locks
her very presence is felt in abundance
Her huge eyes dark as purest deepest sapphires
class more expensive than purest diamonds
with a charismatic magnetism radiating out
overwhelming all within reach of her personality
Stolen from this world she was
No notice to anyone that she would be leaving
Nothing makes sense anymore
And I long to know if we shall meet again
Some new day in a realm beyone ours
Another time another place
I'll wait for her as I hope she will for me
For true love will never die




Based on a true story from Christmas when a young woman went missing - found murdered...  My thoughts went to those around her and inspired to write came this, but I have changed the girls name for the sake of those that knew her...  So sad to still have these things going onin our world...


Details | Rubaiyat | |

No One

Silent screams no one hears
Tired eyes filled with tears
Gut wrenching heartache no one feels
Emotions dark enough to kill
Mental exhaustion no one sees
Strong enough it hurts to breathe
An answer seekin no one speaks
A language spoken without speech


Details | Personification | |

Haste!

How painful it is to fall
Mind I am lost
Please rescue me!
Haste! For stranded I stand
Upon shores bemused
Alongside the sea
Haste!     Haste!
Lest I choose to swim 
And lie beneath what no eye can see

                                                 Compare approach to “Heart, we will forget him!” 
                                                                              By Emily Dickinson


Details | Free verse | |

Emotional Turbulence

The voices grow louder, Intensifying with emotion, anger lining every aggressive word. My insides squeeze tighter as the vitriol poisons my mind, How does such hostility exist? As the sound of hatred deepens, The feelings strengthen their grip, like a vice, So tight, I can no longer breathe All the negative emotions I have ever felt, fill me, Threatening to overflow. So long have they been banished… Enough. No more! My mouth opens, An earsplitting scream of pain and suffering shatters the silence, Sobs of sorrow and grief wrack my body, Murderous shrieks of anger and hate, Wretched cries of self-pity and self-loathing, Poison the air. Now, free of these emotions. But the monster still exists Within the dark depths of my mind.


Details | Rhyme royal | |

Gone With The Wind

The Earth cracks, the plates slide, and we fall of track.
The sun freezes over, and color is beginning to lack.
We fall back, lay in this wake of destruction,
as apocalyptic thoughts grab us, from every direction.

Our life flashes like the lightening in the sky,
the thunder rumbles, and it rains down, as we begin to cry
Time stops and we're still, as a volcano erupts,
the ashes rain down and form clouds, and all we hope for is luck.

But what is luck? What is it to us, but an empty wish.
It's nothing but something we hope for, and we're hopeless.
But it's a possibility, that feels impossible to me,
but it's a picture that I gotta paint, but canvases aren't free.

So I sit as a tornado forms right in front of my eyes,
and I'm scared, but I stand up, and finally realize,
that I gotta fight. Or I'll forever be denied.
I'll forever be alone, and I'll never get it right.

I see a piece of paper, and I think of an easy solution,
it's crumpled up, and you've gotta open to be able to read it.
But it's a blank page, nothing but a piece a paper.
You watch it float in the wind, you'll write a story on it later.

It's gone, Gone Away With The Wind,
you tried but you're own game beat you, you can't win.
No matter the pen, the ink is your blood, it comes from within,
just don't lose it, cause once you lose it then its Gone With The Wind.


Details | Free verse | |

whispers in silence

What keeps me awake
When the cool breeze bears whispers of things to come
Promises to be fulfilled on the morrow?

Is it my joyless moment of cognizance
knowing that this stagnant night ripples from no real breeze
Only imagined promises birthed on the whims of a longing heart?

Yet, what keeps me awake
is not these dreams of flattering winds
but it is this night of lifeless branches and unrifled leaves
the lack of real whispering winds taunting my heart
What truly keeps me awake
Is the silence of tomorrow.


Details | Ballad | |

The Power Of Pride

As I surmise all that is me strewn and cluttered, 
My conscious lies casually shorn and shuttered, 
For here lie the spoils of stubborn iniquity, 
I shuffle and toil, floundering in frailty. 

Oh what great havoc, what conscious so lewd, 
Creates such traffic which now spoils the fruit, 
Of truly righteous deeds committed by a scurrilous man, 
Of whom I could no better know, no better understand, 

For this terribly lost and forever forlorn soul, 
Is none other than me shivering and sniveling so, 
And as helpless as I suddenly appear to be, 
I now understand the strength pride provides so easily, 

For there is purpose in pride, yet none in shame, 
As ambition carries us blind to who’s at blame, 
And just where is the woe when the devil may care, 
For we are soon found alone, our conscious left bare, 

And as I embark into this desolate place, 
My horrors so dark, my fears crimson in taste, 
Forward I race into the perilous pit, 
With none other to blame for this simple life I quit.


Details | Prose Poetry | |

The Taste of a Wish

Tonight I felt the deep inner desire to conform, to feel at right with the crowd for fear of being scorned. But don't be fooled dearest reader, this ain't a story of morals and how I got consumed into a life of addiction or crap like that. This isn't a sob story, just written down at the drop of a hat. The real twist is that I didn't give in, but where does that leave me? A lonesome wanderer gazing at an infinite sea? A person dreadfully awake, in the midst of a miraculous dream? Truth be told I at times feel the luckiest, not drawing near to the most common follies of my peers. But at what price? For who, in a world filled with bubbly laughter, could hear the sound of a silent tear? Who, holding a hand of their own, following a path they love, could notice a shadow like me, so hopelessly alone? I love you all most dearly, but like the moon loves the sea... just out of reach but always in sight. I live my life as the rainbow kisses the earth, wishing for my colors to allay someone else's hurt, if only for a moment, a minuscule grain, on this sandy shore. I am really not so significant, but still I desire to be more. But in all honesty how can I? I'm simply an observer, a reporter looking in. I'm not the strongest, nor the brightest, the bravest, nor the wisest. I am just a man with an eye for beauty and an obsession for the safety of the bench. So still I watch in dread as others live and I just sink. I clutch to papers filled with so much lifeless ink! They are nothing but shards of myself, tossed and thrown in mile high piles, that none in their right minds could ever wish to file! Though the world I live in and the one which I've created, seldom collide, I sit still waiting on that perilous bridge, for someone else just as crazy, and just as lonesome, to sit it out with me, side by side. It may not be perfect but it feels right. And honestly who could hope for more at the end of the night? You have a destination in mind and a foot always in front. You have the whole world palmed in between delicate fingertips. So go on and take a swig! Ingest within you... the taste of a wish!


Details | Couplet | |

Reality

Illusion... illusion
Ooh what a confusion

Entering the world of spirituality, while
Keeping an eye on reality

As conclusion of this confusion
Reality has always been the illusion 


Details | Acrostic | |

Insignificance

I s a child to be heard?
N o one answers, as usual. The silence is slowly killing me.
S orrow, misunderstanding and these mourning memories,
I s this the way it is supposed to be? Since that fateful day, I have been a 
G irl, lost in a whirl of tragic past, calamitous present and the fear of having no future,
N ever have I known what "family", "friends" or "fiends" mean, for
I have never made or heard of any.
F or I am thirteen, just as inconsequential as a dwarf planet, amongst boundless galaxies.
I live in misery, why won't anyone listen to me? I may be young, but I
C an converse, listen and see, and I
A m as normal as you are. So why
N ot give me a chance to prove myself?
C an you ever give me a listening
E ar? Is a child to be heard?


Details | Free verse | |

The Wasteland -Part 1-

How can one express the baffling depths of obscurity? How can one behold to open the shafts of the mind? I have never been able to solve the mystery— Of myself. . . I wish at times that my life was no more That I could live as another and finally see things right But I am always stuck in this darkness And I cannot see this mind in light There are beasts. . .demons prowling through the wasteland Searching for any remaining life And if they are ever found— They are doomed and consumed Fear is their downfall and they never fail to smell it Their ashes remain, dancing with the imaginary breeze It is silent here—there are no answers I wish there were answers. . . But maybe there was never a reason No answers. . . Talons extend and clench around my heart They will never seek me out—they left me here It is like they knew…I had no reason—that was the answer I feel the pulse of my dangling life Alone in the dark, whimpering like a child I have scared myself, becoming this dragon-daggered youth No balm in Gilead! No eyes to see All I know will never be free I don’t need anyone! You are a disgrace—scum of the waste! You have everything, you ungrateful little nothing You are a joke. . . So swallow it all up like the pushover you are Stand your lowest and trudge right through No questions. No answers. Just . You. Or just lie back down into the mush of disease It has already infected you to the core Accept who you are, you ugly pestilence! I hate you Who are you to be glorified? Dream snatcher. . .murderer of all things bright Saturated in what you call light I see right through—even as the reflections shatter All of the dead kept you alive—they all matter… But alive you are the worst there is False savior—edited attention whore I never want to see your face again See, that’s why I hide. . . Desperation. . .desperation. . . I sob and cry kneeling in defeat For once I am right. . .I am right


Details | Free verse | |

'Treasured Commodity'



The reflection says 
you've outgrown us 

I somehow feel sad – 

That which we once had 
has become redundant 

The other side of the coin 
says I should be happy 
‘Cause you've found that inner power,
the ability to go out on your own

and yet letting go
   is like losing 
a part of me 

that object that I’ve grown 
accustomed too –

So I’ll be a bit teary 
even feel a bit used 
but I’ll always be grateful 

no one knew the role you played 
sometimes not knowing 
is a treasured commodity


©120720121045


Details | Senryu | |

You Will Feel

be mindful
human rights are human ways
that lead down

be careful
the words above always remain
wear no crown

trap the sin
destroy the lie of conceit
look within

don't consume all that you see
you will feel
wrong like fire


Details | Rhyme | |

Lord I Praise And Worship YOU





Lord, I Praise And Worship Your Name! Lord, I praise, worship and honor your name! Into my heart… I invite you to rule and reign! Lord, I give you my love and attention! You have set me in a new direction! Lord, it is you that brings a daily reminder… Your grace and mercy is so tender and kinder! Lord, I humbly raise my hands in adoration… And lift you up in worship and exaltation! Lord, Jesus… You are the one I need this day! I appreciate you much more than words can say! Lord Jesus… Thanks for all you’ve done already. When your trumpet sounds… I want to be ready! Dear Jesus, take my life and my way of living! All that I have… To you I am giving! You are and will always be the one for me! How I long to be with you for eternity! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Couplet | |

Taken, never Forsaken

When I try to look back, it hurts to start A mother I was now in continual broken heart In the innocence of that Sunday quietly shopping away When my thoughts to humanity go in angered astray One minute he held my hand, the next he was gone In suspended silence I float amidst stared public throng Questions through confusion as to where I stood last Still feeling his hand, that loving maternal grasp Lights became brighter, louder were the voices Still confusion abounds in sporadic lost choices Who could have taken him, where has he gone So many voices not singing the same song Continually I dream about these words you've just read To the end of my days I can't think of him dead <*>


Details | Rhyme | |

ITS POINTLESS

Now here's a contest that seems pointless
But, up to a point, I guess it will do.
The points in my life have sometimes been fruitless,
I just thought I would point that out to you.

Oh, the point of this rhyme
May be pointed one way,
But it is at this point in time
To score points by what I say.

The point that I am making,
Is that there is always some point
That life points in a way forsaking,
Giving your point a grave disjoint.

I have pointed out many times
that points are good and bad.
But the good points I remember better
Rather than the bad points I have had.

You can sometimes see how pointless it is
To try to point these things out.
As for the point I am making,
You get the point...no doubt!


Details | Senryu | |

Pieces

A heart divided
Hurt knows no bounds anymore
Only time will tell


By: Misty Leccese
© June 16, 2009


Details | Rhyme | |

The one who stares at me

As i gently clear away
the steam that covers the glass
suddenly!
"he" appears
and for now
"he" is temptation
the very person i fear

Although we look the same
this dead-ringer is not me at all
but a false prophet
who deceives me into running
at his beckon call
"he" controls my thoughts
rents out my face
knows my weaknesses
then begins to plot my next fall from grace

The last time
"he" magically appeared 
lessons had to be taught
but nothing was learned
for once again here i stand
to begin the fight
and start the slow burn
"he" is convincing
and so very clever
i am the actor, directing myself
on the next hurtful endeavour!

It's a mystery
when "he"will check in, for a visit
i wish it was never,
but honestly, im realistic
so for today
"he" is in control
my one and only friend
but once gone
that's when the apologies start
and the sorry's never end


Details | Rhyme | |

It's Time to Change

How did you feel when you woke? Were you frightened or lonely, or was your heart broke? Do you feel alone or sometimes afraid? Is it clear that your life’s not meeting the grade? Do you feel uncomfortable in your own skin? Do you feel that you’re losing, but just want to win? Are you having remorse about what could have been? If so, then it’s time to grab paper and pen. Jot some things down you’d like to achieve. Then read them each day and start to believe. We cannot go back and change the past! Standing still today, just won’t last. So get ready, prepare, and take care of your needs. It’s time to firmly plant His seeds. Start with yourself and the rest will follow. I know right now it’s hard to swallow. Be gentle and patient, for there is no doubt, you’ve been hurting so long, both inside and out. If you know in your heart that something’s askew, you must be willing and ready to start anew! There’s help for you along the way. You’ll receive it for sure, so start to pray. Dear God, Please show me where to start. To You, I know I must open my heart. So say each day, “Thy Will Be Done”, and you’ll see it, I’m sure, but just don’t run. Be open and willing to hear and see, all that He is calling you to be. Follow His signs and stay on the road, and when you ask He’ll help bear the load. Don’t bring excess baggage for this trip. Keep it simple, you see or you just might slip. You need to remember to stay on track. Once you start, hold nothing back. For the new road you find is the only way. You’ll get there soon, if you just don’t stray. Now is the time for discipline and prayer. You’ll start to believe you’re in His care. As you practice and try to do the right things, you’ll be eager to see what the next day brings. Your life will be flooded with joy and gladness, and you’ll know he’s there in times of sadness. Life is still life, but just stop and think. Nothing is solved by making a stink! So put all your worries in God’s hands today! There’s no reason to keep them, let go and just pray. I know that miracles do come true. Have faith and His promises will be given to you.
Michelle D. ©October 17, 2006


Details | Rhyme | |

The Tranquillizers




                             THE HOSPITAL FAIRYLAND

They walked together, hand in hand,
Into life’s magical fairyland.
Where there was no trouble, where there was no pain.
Where life could really, begin all over again.
Where were no men in little white coats.
Forcing you all, to stuff drugs down your throats.
Forcing you to do, what you didn’t want to.
Telling you it was all for the best, for you,
People shouting, people crying.
Most of the people talking about dying.
What is this hell, we’ve all come to?
It’s called coming off drugs, we all have It to go through.
Where will it end, what will we do?
None of us really, has a clue.
We are given more pills, we are told, we have to take.
To the men in white coats, life’s a piece of cake.
We are the prisoners, they guard the doors.
Some try to creep out, on all fours.
Into hell and back, we go for a ride.
Eventually if we’re lucky, we come out the other side.
Where we can walk, hand in hand.
Into life’s magical Fairyland.
Where there is trouble, where there is pain.
But at least we can start, living again.





Details | Sonnet | |

Stepping from the darkness of alone

I must carry this torch down to the cave
To shed light upon the walls of my heart
For, if not, I will take it to my grave
And on that path may make an early start

I cannot think of love, when love is what
Consumes my every thought in every hour
I gambled all I have and took my shot
Chanced my wretched life to fate’s cruel power

But love is what I deeply need to give
My life is not my own unless it’s shared
This aching heart with which I have to live
Must find his mate if he’s to be repaired

But first I must let go the one I crave
And leave this burning torch within the cave ~


Details | Rhyme | |

Give Me A Smile

Lately I have began to feel like I'm in this world all alone Blankly,so often staring at things As if they are the unknown My mind seems to be slipping A little more every day I don't think I will ever find the end To the distance it will stray A year ago things were simple Everything was in it's place Now my memory has left me Gone without a trace Once in a while I will think a thought Then write it down as quick as I can But then my days seem shorter With that pen clasped in my hand My minutes have turned to hours Soon my hours will turn to days Next it will be the blue skies That have all been turned to greys My thoughts will begin to get jumbled Unable to speak or write Which then makes all the grey skies All be turned to night So when you ever have a happy thought Think about it as long as you can Then think about the person that wrote this That poet who's name was DAN :o)
(23)


Details | Rhyme | |

blood transfusion



Details | Verse | |

Secretly Obsessed

Obsessed with the thought of you
wondering if it's only me or
if you sometimes remember the sweet things you've said
and if you meant them how I took them
or if I'm just obsessed with what's in your head

Obsessed with your very sentences
Every response I take personal
I know it's selfishness
Have you not noticed my eyes?
They hold secrets that only you can unlock
if you'd just take time to fill the thick juices of my pride
It's just boiling with lust, passion, trust and distrust
and other things I obsess over so much

I find myself writing to free myself from this prison I've created
where only you and I reside
I become confused about what I'm really feeling inside and I 
try to rid the thoughts that are highly debated as false and I
begin to cry and
think of casting love spells so that the universe can deliver this affair
I know it's unfair
but I don't care

I'm obsessed with what hasn't happened between us
I'm obsessed with your heart and that the fact that 
I don't think you've even noticed my selfish innuendos 
and secret undertones that blatantly express my lust
Or maybe you have and you calmly remain in resistance of distrust 
If you could only read my mind by simply touching my fingertips,
I'm sure I'd catch you out the corner of my eye biting your bottom lip
I'm obsessed with the passion and thoughts I think you have
Obsessing over an experience that I may never have....






Details | Free verse | |

My Dilemma

Mind wondering from here to there
Thoughts of what is and is not
Is a person better to stay here on earth
With family that is going on into their own world

                             OR

Reaching up and praying to be with loved ones
Who are waiting for you at heaven's gate
Mind wondering from here to there
Thoughts of what is and is not


Entry: A Dilemma Contest
Sponsor: Joe Flach
Honorable Mention


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Freed Spirit

If I could make myself strong enough to stand firmly in front of the gun,
Do you love me enough to pull the trigger?
Releasing me.
Freeing my mind from this hell.

Captured behind my eyes.
Bleeding in disguise.
Freedom is worth dying for. 
Life is worth being free. 

I live in a world that confuses me. 
I have the world on the surface for everyone to see.  
Then shadowed by my mind, I have a world for only me.
Trapped behind my eyes, misery and lies, betrayal and lust, 
laughter and pain. 

Shatters of un comfort rage destroys the happiness of my reality.
Caught up in the raptured discomfort of what I've created.
Purity is lost, sanity is the cost.
Haunted by my childhood, the curse that lust invoked.

I feel it all around me, absorbing and consuming me.
Attempting escape, yet by my hand just a waste.
I want someone to believe me.
Stand here freely and have the sympathy to release me.


Details | Free verse | |

In Her Fathers Arms

The evening star glowing in a dust choked sky. A girl stands by a window, with a tear in her eye. She stares at the scene, hardly visible through the grime. She whispers in the wind, “Bring my Dad home this time” She opens the window, and climbs outside, Having a flashlight, in her hand, as her guide. Its glow shows the sides of the street. She’s afraid for what the light will meet Bodies piled everywhere she turns, She wants to go home, and never return. What brought this fate upon her town? All her emotions are stripped and torn down. A frightening sound explodes in her ear. Shadows in the road now appear. She run and hides behind a broken wall Praying to god the rest doesn’t fall. Footsteps coming closer to her She can’t tell who because it’s all a blur She backs away further so not to be seen in light, Quieting her heart pounding from fright. Gun shots and screams fill the air, All these sounds, her ears couldn’t bear. A slight whimper slips from her lips, And over the broken stone she trips. The shadows run closer, showering her heart with fear, She wishes they would just disappear. They pass by her; she fills with delight, She just wants to see her dad tonight. She shines the light, to show her place, And to the shine comes a familiar face. She doesn’t understand who’s to blame Because on the tag shows her father’s name. She holds in her tears and refrains from crying. She falls to the ground where her dad was lying. She lifts his arm and buries her face in his chest. She closes her eyes wanting to forget the rest. The shadows emerge yet she doesn’t see, How close the end for her would be. They look down at her, aim, shoot, and fire. Being with her dad is her only desire. The night had ended causing a little girl harm But she took her last breath, in her father’s arms.


Details | Free verse | |

First Thing You Should Know 2

First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache. 
Watching the smoke curl between his fingertips, he wonders.  Is it his body that’s on 
fire or his soul?  Physically he feels fine yet he sees the flames, inside the pain is 
excruciating yet, not a scratch to be seen.  Isn’t that a thought though, not a scratch to 
be seen on his soul.  Why is it that the scratches and cuts that do the most damage are 
the ones you can never see?  How can that much pain not leave a visible mark?  How 
much pain can the soul take before it turns into the story of humpty dumpty, never to 
be put back together again?  Isn’t it funny how you can forget your dying, when you 
have died inside?
First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache.


Details | I do not know? | |

Mistaken For A Senior Citizen!

Ok, I normally keep my cool.
I rarely get THAT mad.
I wanted to knock her teeth out! 
Oh yes, it was that bad! 

I was innocently shopping.
Going about my day.
I was finished with the browsing 
so I headed up to pay.

This nasty, mid-aged woman
looked me in the eye
and what she said made my mouth drop
and made me want to cry! 

She asked if I ''get the discount''.
Of course I said ''I don't know, 
how do you get this discount? ''
and then she said...''Oh, no.''

''Forget it, I'm sure you don't.''
I knew what she meant then...
this woman was asking me
if I was a... SENIOR CITIZEN! ! 

It takes alot to get me mad
and I never ever swear
but, let's just say I bit my tongue
as I left that day from there! 

I told her she just ruined
what had been a decent day.
She gave a smirk and brushed me off
with little more to say.

Perhaps I don't look twenty...
this I will admit.
But, she was at least 60 
and looked every day of it.

How rude to ask a woman
when she's only 34
if she's a senior citizen! 
I won't shop there anymore! !


Details | Free verse | |

Me, Myself, and I.

I am doing this for myself.
I am done being hurt.
I am tired of the heartache.
i wish i never met you sometimes,
i am tired of you being a jerk,
you hated it when i told you how i felt now you don't get to hear or see me anymore.
you broke my heart.
you have hurt me more than anyone in my life.
why do you act like you don't care?
you think your gods gift to women.
i know you do almost every guy i know thinks that.
i have had so many offers that i had to refuse because i'm still not over you.
i know i should be but, but maybe we were meant to be if we were you blew it, and you can't 
say that you weren't happy with me cause i know you were you told me everyday that you 
loved me even when you broke my heart into tiny little pieces you said "i will always love 
you".
i don't know if you do or not i'm just sayin' how i feel cuz maybe one day you will realize that
"hey i'm stupid for lettin that girl go", NO ONE will love you as much as i still do.
and until you realize that don't come around me, cuz if you were to show up right now i don't 
know what i would say because i'm really hurt and anything could come out of my mouth 
and and i wouldn't care!


Details | Rhyme | |

The Other Side

In vile defeat I confided to helplessness
I cringed knowing I know so little
As inadequate as I am I felt responsible 
I felt responsible to know everything

In this mentality I suffered long nights
Over thinking myself and overlooking life
Until I gave up the pain for a little while
And took a deep, dark look to the other side


Details | Verse | |

Enigma's Calling

Extraordinary, I am 
Craving for unusual thoughts
Endless exploration without boundary
Understanding  the gift I shouldn't fought
 
Invisible drawings in my mind
Playing with the words in my head
My passion
The food of my soul
 
I feel so lucky
The random thoughts
A lifetime companion
A self esteem builder
A goal planner
Be my forever life saver
 
I write more
I talk less
I want to please
I chose to bore
 
What tickles me the most
Is to know what I'm for
Thinking is my love
When  my mind goes empty
That's when I hate
 
My day dreaming lust
Organizing things in my mind
Playing roles of simulation
Where images of art is my vision
And words of attitude is my heart


Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide (CO) Week 2: Carbon Cabrona

Smokeless inhales hurt.
I cough tar on my shirt.
As my black lungs breathe,
Shrilling exhales wheeze.

Cabrona
Falls me
Down to
My knees.

The nicotine cracks
My will.
My composure
Spills.

I want 
This.
I must 
Have this.

I sink
Into
The brink
Of madness.


Details | Rhyme | |

Panic Room


Here in this room again 
mind’s racing 
the fan on low…

and I’m not to be trusted 
can’t be left alone here
with shot gun temples 
and a soul full of fear

no worse place than now
I can’t yell it more clearly 
I beg for your attention  
but I can’t stand you near me

contradiction swimming
in the blood of my veins
I’d cut off my hands
to send toxins to drain

I’m gutless
yet I’m too gutsy for action
say that in public
imagine the reaction

I sit in whirl pools
but I’ve always hated heat
and claim to take a stand 
but I’m lazy at my seat

and I’m always on time
as I miss the bus again
I lie in your face 
with a devilish grin

I’m harmless 
and swear I didn’t mean it
I talk about my conscience 
still I’ve never seen it 

in a world of swirling confusions
I’m stuck on the spin cycle
madness,
creating contusions
 
my game’s not over
I need a fresh start
I’m begging for new blood 
cus’ I’ve got a good heart


Details | Free verse | |

'Nowhere slowly'


all you hear is the clock ticking and you can't feel your heart beating time is in a rush to go nowhere slowly you wonder if you are allowed to go with on that rush to nowhere - afraid you might be left behind
©130520121715


Details | Free verse | |

Unphysical

I drop my words
Into a vacuum
-So there's enough room-
But they're vacuumed up
By the lack of air
'Cause I made no wings
To bear them

Without force
I let them go
I let gravity
Take it's course
Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust
Go up in flames
Or slowly rust

All that's eternal
Is that's pure
Pain and hate
And love -no more

And I'm so scared
That it's all in my head
That life's a steady march
To dead
Dead ends
and culs-de-sac
Take one step forward
Then quick!
Turn back.


Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide -CO- Week 3: Talkin' 'bout My 'noxide

The steady pull
of temptation--
a tease on
my resolution.

When I can sleep, 
I take what dreams 
afford me.
In these dreams,
my 'noxide comes
to ward me.

Her smoke is an invitation.
my conscience
falls for
the con science
of my imagination.
I give in
and reality spins.

Between the sleeps, 
I lie in sanity. 
I wonder:
Did I give into 
my humanity?
did I'd err?
Is that
smoke in the air?


Details | I do not know? | |

i began to write love on my arms<3

[beforehand i just want to let you know that i wrote this in honor of November 17th. which is 
To Write Love On Her Arms Day. im hoping to come up with a better one before than. but i 
still hope you enjoy this quickly-wrote one(: ]

this is about me.
this is my story.
it is about my struggle,
my fall downs, 
&& all the breakdowns.
this is about every wound i placed upon my body.
over 60 self inflicted wounds,
that as my story went on they began to heal.
i stoped writing "give up" 
i began to write love on my arms<3
this is about me.
this is my story.
it is about my past.
how it haunted me for years,
&& how im still running from some of it.
this is how i went from a hood rat,
to me actually caring about myself.
i began to write love on my arms<3
this is about me.
this is my story.
it is about how i learned to keep the bottle off of my nightstand.
i dont need liquor running through my veins 24/7.
i started to look at life through sober eyes.
i began to write love on my arms<3
&& as i wrote this day after day, i saw that i was loved. 
i found comfort in better things then pills, liquor, && razorblades.
&& even though i am still in healing,
my story is not over.
&& it will never be.
i still write love on my arms<3


Details | I do not know? | |

My Escape

No explanation for my imagination
It’s my world, it’s my nation
Don’t ask me why things don’t make sense
It just makes things more intense 
My imagination is my escape
I am me 
And my mind is my cape
Away I fly into creation
It’s my time, 
And my patience.  


Details | Couplet | |

The Ever-Present

Light is the Most Damning of Natures Creations,
It Masks Beauty Whereas Darkness Perpetuates it.

                             - The Stars They Shine,
                                             But The Night is Black -

This Space Was Destined To Be Understood By
The Ticking Minds of Sober Gentlemen.

                             - Not A Drunken Irish Boy -
                        - Ceaselessly Inspired by Its Beauty -

The Strings Cast The Vibration Through The Skin,
And the Mind Frees Itself With Anticipation

                             - I Have No Reason To Believe -
                      -  That This World Was Built Upon Love -

The Foundations Beneath Us Quake and Sway, But,
We Choose To Live Above Those Rotten Fathoms.

                             - Ignoring The Ever Present 
                                                 Corruption of Togetherness -

This Earth Spins on Its Broken Axis, Onto a Stage of
Perpetuating Loneliness...

....I Wish I Was Just Visiting,
                        But This is My Home...


Details | Rhyme | |

Lord, I've Been Hurting

		
	
Lord., I've Been Hurting!

This one thing I am
 most certain…
Lately I’ve been really hurtin’.

I trying to do right, but it 
turns out “wrong.”
Where, in life,
do I really belong?

So many people
 pass me by.
Sometimes, someone
may say;  “hi!”

I don’t know if this message is
 getting across?
I feel so confused and 
completely lost.

A message of “help” has my
 prayer and plea…
For God to reach out to me!

He reached down and
made me whole!
HIS love and compassion
 filled my soul!

Spending time with Jesus
 is time well spent!
It was for you and me that 
Jesus was sent!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Prose Poetry | |

I Disappear

wake up to serendipity
ignorant and unknown
shaken and not stirred
blond can be bond

Reality, metaphor and cliche
cheesy juvenile decay
Love, care and hate
past the use by date

of fights and torment
and well deserved lament
salute to the solitary reaper
with Metallica... I disappear


Details | Didactic | |

Saving Grace

Introduction: Don’t you quit no matter how hard it is, no matter how much you struggle.
This is called life; this is the test, with its twists and turns. Make the best out if it.
We just have to believe in Almighty’s light, His saving grace and follow the Grande hope
up to the end of the tunnel, until the end of our lives.



When time gets tough, days seem long
As sometimes it does, you feel the song,
When heroes depart, hearts sink below
And most of us smile, as we feel them glow,
When past calls back to remind us of them
Some tears fall down, even out of gem.

When life gets rough, through those tough times
Just don’t give up, on hope we survive,
We wonder how everything’s still here
That’s when we believe, we have Him to share,
Faith is that bird, which reminds us at night
By singing its songs, that calls us to light

Confusions arise, when fear overcomes
Happiness glow dim, as trusts come undone,
Hearts and rules are made to be broken
In order to improve those that’s unspoken,
Some may confound the truth with the lies
That’s why He gave, us these two eyes.

You make your own choice with the dreams you shelter
That seems way uphill, just makes you stronger,
If you fall thousand times, you don’t quit the tour
You succeed one time and you reach your goal,
To some it seems hard, to you it’s the art
Some may just quit but you try and try, till the new start.


Details | Rhyme | |

Only God Can Answer

When I was very young, 
Dad and I would fly my kite.
So one day I finally asked him, 
"how does God make wind and light?"
"Only God can answer that."
He told me with a smile.
"So ask him when you get there!"
I nodded, then played a while.
When we first turned sixteen, 
my best friend got a brand new car.
We had plans for Friday night, 
but Wednesday, she didn't get far.
I cried when I hung up the phone, 
"Daddy! Why my best friend?"
He came and sat down on my bed, 
as we talked about the end. 
"Only God can answer that."
He told me with a smile.
"So ask him when you get there."
Then I laid and cried a while.
Further down the road, 
I stood dressed up in white.
The night that I'd been waiting for, 
I'd found my Mr. Right!
I asked, "Daddy why am I so blessed?
I seem to have it all!
When some just have no luck, 
they don't have much at all."
"Only God can answer that."
He told me with a smile.
"So ask him when you get there."
Then he walked me down the aisle.
Then thirty years flew by.
Two jobs, Dad's cancer, and my baby.
and Daddy's time grew shorter, 
and every day became a maybe. 
Then sadly the Dr. said "its time to say goodbye "
and by his bed I stood.
I just couldn't believe it, 
that he'd be gone for good.
"Daddy why do you have to go?"
I asked him as I sobbed.
I knew it was his time, 
but still, my heart felt robbed. 
"I'll ask him when I get there..."
he told me with a smile.
"If I even care! I'll meet Jesus in a while!
I know you think that this will hurt you, 
but these days are grains of sand, 
and heaven is the Ocean!
We'll be together once again."


Details | Haiku | |

Roll'em

One wake-up away
From the best day of your life.
Life’s just a crapshoot. 


Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide (CO) Week 1: O.D.A.A.T.

Chain smoke until
I'm in care of the CO.
There's one left, still.
I smoke it really slow.
"It's the end," I anticipate
As the last inch evaporates.

I can't get
Over it;
It's over before 
I know it.
Butt, I can't quit.
I'm possessed with this 
Obsession; I'm addicted.

My lungs have oxygen,
Yet I'm suffocating inside.
I can't breathe again
Without my 'noxide.


Details | I do not know? | |

before you came along

Before you came along
 everything was going all wrong
 i didn't know what to do 
but that was before i knew i needed you

 i would walk down the streets all alone 
going every where but home
 
before you came along
 
i would turn my face to the sky 
wishing i could tell this world a quick  goodbye 

before you came along
 
i would fall down 
so far down i had to look up
 to see the ground 

but before i could shed another tear
 you were here 
 holding me in your arms

you had finally come along
 just in time to help me be strong
 
i love u
 
now u are ready to go
 i did something, 
what,
 i guess ill never know
 this has all played out like a bad song
 because now your going
 going
 going
 GONE :(
 




Details | Free verse | |

Happily Ever Disaster

I looked up and there you were
My prince
My fairytale
My happily ever after

You stood by my side
You made me strong
You made me believe in you
I trusted you

I looked up and there you were 
My enemy 
My deepist fear
My worst nightmare

You brought me down
You broke me apart
You made me give up my hope
I loved you

I looked up and there you were
My living hell
My darkest night
My happily ever disaster

I'm saying fairwell


Details | Lyric | |

Normal To Me

This isn't just a poem This isn't just another emotion This is me, these are my thoughts The Imagery is my sight, And The Allegories are my Life I'm lonely, There is just me But there's so many people around but no one can hear my loudest screams Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me I'm torn, I'm Cut Part of my heart stabbed, and then taken from me The Search for my innocence, Is like a moa hunt Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Laughing and Jokes all directed towards me Just to Hurt me Cover all of the Halls "Fag, Emo, Queer" Words I too often know Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Curling her hair putting on her makeup "You're worthless and nothing to Me" Says the so-called all-loving-one As she screams: "Why am I not Pretty" Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me This is not just a poem not just some words my pen cries with each words But this is Just a Glimpse Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me


Details | Light Poetry | |

Broken soul

 You've caused me, so many tears	
That our home
Is flooded
			
                                                 You stepped on me, so many times
			 That my heart
			 Is flat


		                                              You have lied to me, so many times
		                                              That my soul
		                                              Is broken


Details | Rhyme | |

WATCHING A SUMMER STORM IN DOYLESTOWN

    WATCHING A SUMMER STORM IN DOYLESTOWN
I was laid to rest, 
my death keeps getting better.
If you find me here, you know, I'm yours to keep.
I could try to say 
I love you in this letter,
or pretending you are here, sing you to sleep.

If the world was mine,
I find it quite amusing,
I would give it all away, to see your eyes,
I would save your life,
and everything you're losing,
all because you never see who's telling lies.

I am just as dead
as is your heart each morning.
If the wind has blown, you know I will be there.
I will touch your life,
without much of a warning,
never look for me, just know I'm everywhere.

I'm a summer storm,
my hope is crashing thunder.
I'm a lightning bolt, my love is five alarm.
if I rain all night,
it's just a spell I'm under,
you should know I'm dead, and won't do any harm.

I'm a little boy.
An old man getting younger.
All I have is how I know how things should be.
We still want the world
to live in death and hunger,
yet I love your eyes, when your eyes look at me.


Details | Free verse | |

Hurt

I can't tell you what it is I can't even tell you what it feels like I can only tell you that it's the worst pain You'll ever feel in you life It'll feel like every bone in your body is breaking Like every breath you take will be your last Like every muscle in your body is failing to support you And thats only the least of it. There is so much more! You eyes will feel like they're bleeding from all the tears you'll shed. You tounge will swell with words that you can't say. Your ears will make you question everything coming into them. And your heart, Well thats the worst part of it! It will feel as though its stopped beating... And who knows, maybe it has.


Details | Quatrain | |

THE AUTHORITY

Why can't she learn to do that right?
You'd think that she'd know better.
Someone should tell her what to do,
To hone her each endeaver.

What is he doing over there?
He should be over here.
He should be told where he belongs,
And make it very clear.

She never does as she is told,
Although I've tried and tried;
What she should do and how and when,
I took it all in stride.

I spoke to her, I spoke to them,
To bring her back in line;
But she is stubborn, wants her way,
But she will learn in time,

That I am right and she is wrong,
I'll teach her that I know,
Much more about her work than she,
I'll tell her where to go.

It seems my help and good advice,
Is just ignored and spurned.
I only want the best for all,
The best for all concerned.

I guess my help's unwanted,
But if 'twere put to test,
They all would see that I am right,
And my way is the best.



No matter where you go or what you do you're going to find some people in the world who think they know more about eveything than anyone else and they will do their best to force their opinion on everyone they come in contact with. Th ebest way to handle someone like this is to give them a wide berth. Stay aloof but friendly in a distant sort of way. However, don't hesitate to let them know you cannot and will not be bulllied because this type of person capitalizes on your weakness. Whenever they start something with you it's important to make sure everyone knows exactly what was said and done when it happens so you don't end up looking the fool instead of them. When they find out that instead of keeping quiet you will fight back using their own methods against them they will back off and leave you alone.


Details | Imagism | |

SLEEPING WITH THE DEVIL'S WIFE

   SLEEPING WITH THE DEVIL'S WIFE
Some night you'll wake before morning
Sweatin to the oldies she will sing.
She'll make you think you're in Heaven...
Long enough to tell you ANYTHING...

And you'll believe her.

Some night you'll wake up hearing voices
Sweatin to the oldies of here life.
She'll never say you're in Heaven.
Or tell you you've been sleeping with the Devil's Wife.

She'll never tell you, you've been sleeping with the Devil's wife.

But you will KNOW.
You will know.

That's when you'll need her.
That's when you'll love her the most.
That's when you will die.
Sleeping with the Devil's wife.

That's when you will die.
   
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa ---hear the song and First take Video on Youtube, search for vee bdosa then select SLEEPING WITH THE DEVILS WIFE. One of my personal favorites, more poetry than song.


Details | Romanticism | |

Delicate Flower

Delicate flower
So lovely, and so sweet
Ravaged by wind
And rain and summer heat

Joyful to view
With the sweetest scent
Why nature could bring
harm to you
Makes me wonder where God went

I cry inside
I'll never understand
How such delicate beauty
Could come to such evil harm
All I see is beauty
And innocent loving charm.


Details | Free verse | |

A Letter of Love/Hate

This hurts too much,
Even though at times
Its the best thing ever.
However,  the pain I feel right now 
Is destroying all that I am. 
I feel worthless and dumb. 
Vunerable and used. 
I also feel loved and special. 
Beautiful and wanted. 
These feeling are so extreme in every which way possible.
I love how I feel when with you
I hate how I feel guilty when we part
I love looking in your eyes
I hate when mine cry
Your fingers along my face also touches her
Those lips that drive me crazy
Are sleeping against her neck tonight
I love who I am around you
I hate what I have turned into
I love the way you make me feel
I hate that she must feel that as well
No matter how good it feels
This pain is too much to bear
I love you
I truely truely do
But the hurt is not worth
The random few moments of bliss.
Goodbye, my love-hate lover
Goodbye





**Note**
This is a letter/poem I wrote for someone special. But it moves me so much every time i 
read it, I thought maybe someone else would enjoy reading it as well. 'To write is to share 
with the world, how we all feel but never speak of'     Lisa


Details | I do not know? | |

I Can Always Pretend

The cold touch of the metal
On my soft bare skin
The turn out can only be fatal
Ill do this with a grin
No one can ever tell
That i even feel this way
Depression doesnt ring their bell
But i know that this is the day
The day this all ends
The day that i fade
The day i make amends
The day i wont be afraid
Iv hidden it for so long
No ones ever known
Im not really this strong
The real me has never been shown
This metal razor is cold
On my oh so soft bare skin
The move im making will be bold
When i decide to let depression win
My life cut short
My life gone
My life had no support
My life is done
This razor now bloody
With a smile on my face
No movement from my body
My smile not out of place
Lying on the floor
Note tucked in my hand
Please do not ignore
For this is what it read
"I ended it for you
I ended it so be happy
Its what i had to do
I even made it snappy
You were the one
That i chose
You made me numb
And let me go
My life had its ending
But see im smiling
Im still pretending
That your 'i love you' wasn't you lying"


Details | Free verse | |

Truth

The truth leaks out
Standing there like a frail child
Taking the hands of the elder
Looking through the glass of lonesome
And seeing what rings real
Seeing what feels true
This gash in my heart mends
At the thought of you
But it never truly heals
Stranded in the wasteland of my mind
Brushed by burning cold winds
I fear there are no blinds over you
I fear you will see it
The flaws
The very flaws I use to stitch myself
Locked up inside all of these years
Shadows ready to be freed
Only to be followed by greed
The skies have lost all color
Through the stitching
Truth bleeds
Truth hurts so bad

The truth is I love you
But why am I so sad? 

I can't say a word
My feet are firmly planted on larvae
They slowly eat me away
Hoping I will be gone in time
Before you see
Before you see the truth
I don't want you to see
Perhaps if you only knew
That I love you
Perhaps you wouldn't have to open your eyes


Details | I do not know? | |

Dreams

If only I can believe in myself
I know I can learn to love this life of mine
Still, I want to know the real me
To meet the one inside of me

If I close my eyes and dream
Maybe I can see it
To know and feel it
But I know

Dreams are still a dream
Although it is far away
I believe it can be reached
For just by dreaming like this
I am a step closer to it

If only I can believe in myself
I know I can learn to love the people around me
Still, I want to know that special someone
To meet the one that is meant for me

If I close my eyes and dream
Maybe I can see it
To know and feel it
But I know

Dreams are still a dream
Although it is far away
I believe it can be reached
For just by dreaming like this
I am a step closer to it


Details | Blank verse | |

Hope

Some divine light
Beams upon my life

Every day the same sight:
A star beyond shallow sky,

Would I see you if I die?


Details | Rhyme | |

Shameful Morning

not sure how she got here 
only know she needs to leave

underneath the stranger 
my arm numb; asleep, 
mouth a desert.
a hundred dead cigarettes dance my tongue dry 

princess of night 
exposed by light. 
get me out of this;
another dreaded morning mess. 

bed broken
along with my will. 
I swore never again; 
the lie is half the thrill.

~JSLambert


Details | Prose Poetry | |

a fair day

It was a fair day for silence.

The sun had risen up courtly, almost mechanically,
Like a marionette on the strings of a puppeteer.
With the sun came Heat, wrathful to have been woken at such an hour.
As if avenging its early rise, 
Heat caused oppression, 
Discomfort and confusion 
Upon the innocent day.

It was a fair day for exclusion.

Only one was oblivious to the relentless heat,
He sat there motionless, lifeless and corpse-like.
They would glance at him nonchalantly.
He was just a piece of the scenery, 
Always had been there, 
Always would be there, 
Invisible.

It was a fair day for neglect.

Some say once he had been aware,
But life had hollowed him out, 
Left him a shell, 
Unmoving, 
Unblinking.
The day progressed, the light dimmed, 
It was as if fate and destiny had led him to this moment.
If anyone had cared to look, they may have noticed a glint in his eye.
He liked the sunset.

It was a fair day for an end.

The sun slowly made its way back home.
Heat gradually left, bored with the sun’s absence.
Silence was once more.
The sun closed its eyes. 
The moon began its regime over the obeying night sky.

It was a fair day for sweet nothing.

He still sat there, 
But no one knew.
So was he still alive, 
If no one saw him die?


Details | Free verse | |

What Is Perfection?

What is perfection? Is it the way you look?
Or just maybe the way you look at me.
You stole my heart just like a crook,
I just hope you cannot see.

I'm scared to death,
I don't know what to do;
I can't catch my breath
When I'm around you.

You say this is normal,
You say I'm alright;
You don't have to be formal,
I won't bite!

Just a brush of skin sends shivers through me,
I melt when you look into my eyes.
All I can see is eternity,
As my past dies.

Is it too soon to feel this way?
Am I going insane?
There's so much I'd like to say,
But is it all in vain?

How can I be sure I'm the only one?
How do I know your feelings are true?
I don't want to have it all come undone,
Because I didn't trust you.


Details | Rhyme | |

Have You Been Hurt By Religion

Have You Been Hurt By “Religion”?

Are you tired of “religious people”
 knocking at your door?
You wish they’d leave...  “You can’t take it anymore!”

Have you been hurt by “church people” sometime in the past?
Somehow they hurt you...  And the pain continues to last…

Have you been “wounded” by something
 somebody has said?
Perhaps you wonder if “they wish you were dead…”

Perhaps there’s someone that you 
may have “befriended…”
They have done something that
 has hurt you and “offended.”

There’s probably many people that you wish would “go away.”
Because of something they’ve 
done to “darken your day.”

I’ve been there many times…  Believe me I know.
How someone’s actions or words can hurt your soul.

Even those who go to church are 
often not very kind.
And they don’t hesitate to 
give you “a piece of their mind.”

Religion is not the answer.  Look to Jesus 
and the life he gives!
He alone has the power to love
 and completely forgive!

It’s only in his shed blood that you can find atonement.
He can change your life now!  This very moment!

He can heal your broken heart and wounded spirit.
An everlasting joy and love...  He freely gives it!

He can do what no “church” or “religion” could ever do
He can restore your life today.  
And make you BRAND NEW!!!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

feigned freedom

forced solitude
compulsory confinement
freedom from the sun

tall walls
large locks
glum guards

the soundless flow of time
yawning years
freedom of thoughtlesness

timed routines
in a timeless atmosphere
feigned freedom


Details | Verse | |

THERAPY

There are no lies to be written
Real life is how it's read
What I write is the honest truth
No more regrets
I've been pushed 
I've been shoved
Straight in the gut 
Where my heart bleeds out the love
No bandage around 
To patch it up
Pressure more pressure against me
On the floor bleeding
No help to come save me
Pain creeps around the room 
On the floor I try to breathe
Therapy
Need the therapy
Read this aloud 
Know what I'm about
Feel my pain
Read it
Look at my face 
Be it
I get up on my feet
Love still dripping
Someone help me!
I can't see
Therapy
Need the therapy
As I open my eyes
I see plain white bright walls
Around me 
I'm strapped
Noticed I'm patched
What happened to me?
I sit there and wonder 
Why me? Is this my fantasy?
This is what therapy put on me


Details | Rhyme | |

How Can We Hurt The Ones We Love

How Can We Hurt The Ones We Love?

How can we hurt the very ones that we love?
How can we easily neglect our God above?

It seems like I often heard about many victims
Many times, it’s from a loved one who’s been with them!

The hate and the anger that boils from deep within.
Often “boils over” toward our family and friends.

It’s the love of Christ that we need to find!
His love can totally cleanse our life and mind!

The hearts of many families are bruised and broken.
By the harshness of many of the words spoken.

If we would allow Jesus to rule and reign.
We’d have little reason to murmur or complain.

If we would yield our lives to the master’s will…
The emptiness and brokenness, he shall fulfill!

If we could allow ourselves to sit at Jesus’ feet…
He can make any family totally complete!

If we could just listen to what Christ has to say.
His words of life would brighten our day!

As a family…  Won’t you give HIM a chance?
And allow his love to change your circumstance!

Won’t you allow his spirit to bind you together?
You can experience his peace today and forever!

He can change your family throughout!
This is his will and what God is all about!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Ballad | |

Across the Way - The Sequel

Another day and the dishes have piled up yet again
So back I end up in front of the window 
I do not glance up, but concentrate
On the dull, dirtied objects before me
I do not hear the voices from yesterday
I still wallow in the grime of gray
I smile in malcontent
As I lather the dishes with soap
Against my will, I look up 
To see a lone, fat man opening a refrigerator
He is shirtless, bulgy, and he looks pregnant
My first supposition is to laugh
But I only look back down at the dishes
Not wanting to stare at the fat man
Not wanting to think he looks pregnant
For sure not wanting him to be my neighbor
Across the way

Against my will again, I look up
The fat, pregnant man is gone
I see ornaments on the refrigerator
Some pictures, some magnets
Family; not so different from my life
But yet, there is a transparent fancy of mystery
A flashy rage of difference in the silence
Oh, so quiet
The blazing sun sprays its light upon the hour
Not only are my hands wet from the soapy water
The deafening tone of quietude
Revels in me a mixture of loneliness and physical heat
A burning desire for something not seen
A desire for utter disgust of my newly found neighbors
But I find myself not disgusted at all
Until I look up again and see a fully naked man at the window
Across the way


Details | Rhyme | |

Caught In The Black Rain

She's caught in the black rain, emotions are swimming in darkness, as the
 acid rain impairs her vision; within the depth her soul she's unable to find goodness.

The falling black rain has her mind in a state of confusion, murder is no longer
 an ill illusion, actions has drawn it's fatal conclusion.

Upon her the black rain fell bringing misery with pain, living life in vain, constantly
 seeing loss with no gain, and her mental health is far from being sane.

Few have already seen the devastating effects of falling black rain, it's aftermath
 makes the sanest go insane, and those who survive the storm their lives will
  never go back to being simple nor plain.

Falling black rain is a storm formed from mental pain, financial strain, loss with
 no gain, and living life in vain.

Though, in my theory of goodness lies this conclusion," Things that we see as 
 being favorable unto living life is nothing more than our ill illusions," and there-
   fore it's causing us an in-depth state of confusion.


Details | Personification | |

Indignant

Indignant am I,     
My Life on the Line.
Through self inflections of my       
Dope sick addictions.
Raping my soul.
Unable to recover.
Failure as a mother.
Spinning out of control,
No place to go, 
No one to hold.
As an abuser,
I have no hope for the future.
Needing a hand 
But I have not a friend.
My hateful demise has pushed them aside.
Ashamed of my choices,
I'm riddled with guilt.
My children at risk,
Hurt and broken,
Loving me still.
Oh, what I'd give to be free from of all my Ill's
For the Love of God to find his way 
Back to this dope sick mother
In desperation of his blessings
To be forgiving
For I am his child, and I need him to come into my life.
For I am not ready to die
Just to recover!


Details | Rhyme | |

emo for no emotions? or for emotions?

The emotions that i feel inside
are like nothing that i've had when i'm alive
Most of the time i hide myself in darkness
and I feel as if i drown in coldness

The days surpass me like never before
with joy and happiness knocking at my door

I ignore them and go on 
i go on as if there's nothing wrong
I am in the dark with no sense of feeling
trying to not lie to those around me

They ask if they can help in any way
I say that i am fine
When actually i have millions of things inside my mind

They say emotions are just things people feel
when actully it can also be actions

Teens cut themselves and claim they are emos
when they really have more friends than foes
Can emo be for emotional for those who can't understand
what they hold dear to them everyday "hand-in-hand"?

Times can be rough
but that doesn't mean that you can act all tough

What does emo mean to you?
can you not see those who love you and me?
No emotions or emotions,
you can't pick both,
you see?

Don't try to be who yu want to be 
just be yourself
And that applies to you and me


Details | Rhyme | |

They Tell Me

Smile they tell me
Laugh, they tell me
Look up, they tell me
I'm scared
You're loved, they tell me
Encircled, they tell me
Not lonely, they tell me
Unprepared
I'm worthless, so tell me
Just why they tell me
I'm loved.. oh? Tell me
Just why
I'm shaking and lonely
Lost and not homely 
A tear in my eye,
This sky
Is calling upon me
Is falling upon me
It's downing upon me,
In the dirt 
Life's hopeful, they tell me
"I didn't mean that", they tell me
"It doesn't matter," I say, 
"it hurt"


Details | Light Poetry | |

Something Odd Goin' On

What's up?
What's going on?
How come it's 3AM?
And bright as noon?
Have I finally made it
Into a Looney-Tune?

Who left me a hot breakfast,
Then disappeard?
How the hell did I
Overnight grow a green beard?

And that new Lamborgini
In my driveway
Painted purple, black,
and red, each a circle round

Am I a mad old hack?
I see a cab's roof light
On it, like a crown.

The door sign says
$100.00 first quarter mile,
$200.00 each following quarter
So ridiculous I had to smile

Is this someone's idea
Of a joke?
To make of me,
A fool , one to poke?

I grabbed my pants,
To go out to inspect
Golly, gosh darn
This I did not expect...
Every pair had four legs,
you see...
Someone tell me,
How this could be!

Perhaps I'm yet asleep,
And this is but a dream,
Maybe a nightmare brought on
By last night's ice cream
So I dug out the ice cream,
To see the brand and flavor,
Perhaps laced with acid,
By some angry neighbor...

"Trolley Madison" the brand,
The flavor "Mulch"
I start to feel a panic grow,
Turn on the TV to distract me,
You know?
But it does not come on,
The dryer does,
And the radio blasts
A Taliban song,
What the hell is going on?
What part of hell is this?
What did I do so wrong?

Guess I'll go back to bed,
And hope my next awakening
Will be more normal instead,
So I return to my bedroom now,
All I can utter is "Holy Cow!"

For my bedroom is now
A subway station,
Out here in the Kansas plains, to boot!
I better get some whiskey,
I sure could use a toot!

I pour some Southern Comfort,
And out pops corn bread and grits...
I guess I should be grateful,
It wasn't a bowl of horsy sh_ts.

I better call my boss,
Explain I'd be late to work,
But he had never heard of me,
And thought me but a jerk...

And I could hardly
disagree with him,
For when I put down the phone,
The chord was a garden snake
And I was not alone

The cats I don't own,
 the dog I'd dreamed of getting,
All crowded around me,
For food and some petting

In panic, I went out the front door,
Not knowing what to expect
Found myself on the conning tower
bridge,
Of an atomic submarine quite wrecked

Enough!  Enough! Enough!
I cried,
Clenched fist aimed at the sun
Why have you forsaken me?
What wrongful sin have I done?

But the seas did not part,
And the nightmare did restart.
I dove over the side of the submarione,
Ending up next to my bed
On the floor with reality shed.









Details | Free verse | |

Nightmare

Rest is a requirement,
for all,
in order to have this,
sleep is a must,
after a day’s of hard work,
wherein sleep is a must,
for all,
to freshen up the next day,
though the mind goes to sleep,
and the body follows suit,
the subconscious mind awakens,
and in lie,
a number of dreams,
awaiting you,
the dream,
that always reigns in my mind,
is the death of my wife, 
not once,
but more than a couple of times,
why does this dream,
often arise in my mind,
is the answer I seek,
is it because of the love we have towards one another,
or is it the compassion for each other,
or is it in relation of serving one another, 
or is it a kind of warning,
a warning to take care in the future, 
some people may call this as the sixth sense,
while I call this a nightmare,
as nightmares are really scary,
yes, nightmares are quite scary indeed, 
if you do agree with me or not!!

From:-Mr.Manu Nair (dated 19th November, 2012)


Details | Rhyme | |

Take Me Away

I dream in darkness.
I sleep to die.
Erase my sorrow.
Erase my lies.
Our burning ashes,
Blacken the day.
A world of nothingness.
Take me away.


Details | I do not know? | |

Raped

Lost Innocence Anonymous
Looking back on a time and place,
Seeing a child's innocent face.
Knowing that things aren't as they appear,
For inside I cry silent tears.
Deep inside, I am filled with pain,
I feel dirty and full of shame,
Innocence lost at a very young age,
Locked me in a pain filled cage.
There is no freedom or escape,
From the fact that I was raped.
While the guilty man is roaming free,
I am sentenced to eternity,
Eternity locked away with all this shame,
I can't help but feel that I am to blame.
Even though common sense says
it was not my fault.
I can't seem to help from having these thoughts,
What ifs keep running through my mind,
I keep going back to those moments in time.
If there isn't something I could have done,
Why didn't I scream, or at least try to run.
Fear kept me frozen to the spot,
While this man did what he should have not.
Shame and fear made me keep the silence,
Kept me from telling anyone about the violence.
The thing that is shocking beyond belief,
Is that I could not get any relief.
The same thing happened again and again,
the first one was just how it began.
More than one man did his worst,
None of them caring about the child they'd hurt.
After the first time,
was it easy to tell.
Was it my pain and shame they could smell?


Details | Elegy | |

Moon Walk on Your Grave

Moon Walk on Your Grave

A life begun in stardom,
now, ending up in shame.
Relentless media, cruel world,
who then is there to blame.

A sadness inside,
no tears on your face.
The pain all but over,
mass confusion erase.

In wonder we watch,
can a life be explained?
Can't surface your agony,
under facade you remained.

Let's focus on the talent,
musical joy that you gave.
In peace now I pray,
moon walk on your grave.

© Rene' Brady 2009


Details | Free verse | |

Happy

When I’m all alone
I try to kill the thought of you
Assuring myself
You’re just a ghost passing through

And now that you’re here with me
I feel the need to soar and fly
Only thing is:
I’d much rather crawl away and die

I don’t want to be happy 
I don’t want to fool myself
I don’t want to feel the pressure
Of putting on a heaven in hell

I don’t want to be your angel
I don’t want to face the growth
I don’t want to be happy
I don’t want the aching truth

You never saw me in your stride
As I smiled wide in my heavenly hide
Believing in myself without a chance
Not able to grasp this ghostly romance

You smoked me like a cigarette
Burning out my love, leaving butts of regret
And all the time I laugh and smile
As you see right through me all the while

I don’t want to be happy
I don’t want to live a lie
I don’t want to feel your leisure
As I crumple down to die

I don’t want to disappoint you
I don’t want to show and tell
I just want to see you happy
Just leave me in the dark to dwell


Details | Narrative | |

Shut Your Dirty Mouth

Tonight I thought I shook off a roach. Swore I felt it approach. Imagined it crawling down
my throat. My Dad came out from the den and asked What’s Wrong? I said, Nothing, I’m fine
when I still felt bits of dead roach nesting in my spine. That’s Divine.

I feel the Holy Spirit in me tonight. Jesus Christ! I must have done right! Don’t come
near me, I’m contaminated, clearly. Oh, God, need me! So that the sky doesn’t turn black
every time I look up to seek your advice. My chips are stacked, I’ve got them wracked.
Roll the dice six six six every time. On my Dime. I think I may have crossed the line.
Maybe I’m sick. Maybe I’m not hip to this.

Maybe I just need to settle down. Take a breath. Take a pill. Sit real still. Stare until
I become comatose blare my music so loud that my eyes become brazen and I can’t hear what
you’re saying.

Do roaches bite? I wonder at night. As I hide beneath the covers that used to shield us
from one another. Protect us from the evils in this world, bring no harm to little girls.
Now they just cover up old condoms and dirty food crumbs.

Numb. Numb. Numb. Can’t move. Limbs feel numb, limbs feel wrung, limbs feel slung,
stammering and slurring like grandma after her stroke.

This is a joke. The world’s a joke. We’re a joke.

Then why aren’t we laughing? Why aren’t we guffawing until our paws fall off, our mittens
become smitten and we cough up our dirty lungs with joy.

Oh boy, here I go again. If this is a joke why aren’t we laughing? Why aren’t we guffawing
until our paws fall off, our mittens become smitten and we cough up our dirty lungs with joy.


Details | I do not know? | |

My Dad

It never quits
My dad's h i t s
I see myself in the mirror
And I am to become
But I just go numb
It hurts to see
What all he has done to me
It never fails
When he hears me wail
It never quits
My dad's h i t s


Details | ABC | |

GoodBye

                               GOODBYE

I miss the way you hugged me when I cried and how you told me how you loved me 
every night but now you won't even look at me and you don't even talk to me 
anymore and when I'm upset you just laugh and walk away........... All I want to 
know is what did I do that was so bad that you treat me like a punching bag........ I 
miss the way you kissed me but I guess you've moved on and I try boy do I try but 
your all I dream about all I think about is you, you were my world and now your 
gone I'm so lost without you I cry every night because someone will say your 
name....... What I miss most of all is that I could tell you anything but now you won't 
even listen.............. What kills me is you saying goodbye for good goodbye god 
those words kill me every time good bye good bye good bye....


Details | Free verse | |

Untwisted

Sometimes the memories won’t fade 
         All the places we have seen
         All the prices we have paid 
The memories of the happy as well as the sad 
            The people we’ve lost
           The friends that we had 
Some memories just seem like a ghost 
I always lost everyone that I loved the most 
The wind would just carry them away 
             Along with my tears 
            And my ability to pray
    I wonder how far is heaven from here?
              How many more heartaches 
                 How many more tears 
              I wonder how far it is away
Because I have so many things that I wish to say 
To all the people that I loved and I lost 
             I’m not even tripping 
             My heart paid the cost 
The reaper rode the river in a bikers disguise 
I’ll never forget the fear in my mother’s eyes 
    As he drug her under and then let her go 
Through my four year old veins hate started to grow 
My eyes were blind my ears were deaf 
After that I forgot  
           There was anything left  
Karma is like poker for it is bound to luck 
When I was just a boy 
God through me under the truck 
Of all the things in life we feel 
   We are all bound to God’s will 
Passion is a doorway between love and hate 
    God is the dealer in the game of fate 
              Our place is not to question why 
                       For if we do our faith will die 
            The deeper we hate the deeper we love 
            I was gifted wisdom by the Lord above 
                    Every gift comes at a price 
A world of experience behind my advice 
     Every smile holds a lifetime of pain 
Nothing that happens should happen in vein 
                         It is our choice that which we do 
 Know in your heart these words are true 
The harder we fall the further we climb 
             No ones life is totally sublime 
Illusion after illusion will be offered to you 
                 But only the living word is true 
The living word that beats in your heart 
Will keep you safe as the world falls apart 
Through the pain of a boy watching his mother die 
It’s never to late to kiss the sky
A man of faith who could never give up 
Please come break my bread and share in my cup 
By the time our journey is through 
                      I’ll share all I am with you 
          Hopefully somewhere in my words you’ll see 
              ---Untwisted is truly the way to be---



Details | I do not know? | |

Can I Buy A Cheat Sheet For God's Test?

When we get to Heaven...
will there be a type of ''customs'' 
we have to pass through? 
Will there be a test? 
What will the questions look like? 
Multiple choice, I hope...
I always do better on multiple choice tests.

Maybe this would be a sample question: 

1.  When I pass somebody in obvious need I: 

A.  Walk by and pretend I didn't see them.
B.  Stop and offer help (and hope they decline) .
C.  Stop and help.
D.  None of the above...I don't see anyone else but myself.

Or, maybe they would be questions that we can give a
''never, sometimes, most of the time, always''
type of answer.

Like: 

1.  I thought about other people's feelings: 
___Never
___Sometimes
___Most of the time
___Always

I've given this some thought
not because I have an unexplainable amount of test anxiety.
Rather, I have an unexplainable fear
of not living my life as it was intended to be lived.

And, will this be ''graded on a curve''?


Details | Free verse | |

Oddly Enough

Multiple fractures of my skull
Makes my thoughts void and null
Motor neurons now shut down
Synapse connections now unwound
Muscles jerk
All thought burned away
But oddly enough
This was my finest day.


Details | Quatrain | |

Forlorn

Your life is a journey
Which will never wax or wane
A beacon of bottled moonlight
Anchored waves of radiant rain
There is no demise
Or salvation of plundered plight
Cast into a sea of superstition
In the depths of torrential night
Your life transcends flesh
That sinking vessel which we mourn
It resides in a shipwrecked message
Found on the shores of faith’s forlorn


Details | ABC | |

A Yearn for a Smile 9-21-11

	A yearn… simply something that you want or long for. As a yearn to finish, a yearn to achieve, a yearn for a like, a yearn for a smile is something that you drastically want, a desire. Something that you spend long hours, nights even day dreaming hours thinking about how you can earn that smile. What can you do…. or what can you say … things such as a conversation sparks, likes even dislikes, mostly anything that will crack a smile. These are things that truly show signs of something far greater than fame, sex, money, power. What is it? Something more than I have yet to find. So as I search for the answer I over shoot the entrance with rapid thinking of what she wants, her likes, her dislikes. But truly it will only be earned by who you are, what you want to be, yourself, your feelings your desires, your yearn. So when you yearn for that smile or that special something it can only be earned by being you, no one else. Take a look at yourself in the mirror and try to see past the makeup or tan or piercing and just look at yourself… then take that image and imprint it to yourself forever because to find happiness and your yearn  can only be earned one way. Trying to watch her and she how she reacts to certain things just to make myself seem better when I finally open my mouth to her will only make you distant from that special someone.  With me I personally see myself as buff pierced orange person, while trying to continue to follow the people who I look up to the most. So as you struggle and go through life’s trials and tribulations always look at your yearn or what it once it what was. Think about how you felt when you failed or succeeded and try to make yourself a better person from it. Not by adding more glamour or appeal to yourself but by being closer to yourself. What you really are. Because only then can you truly say you earned your yearn of a smile or that special someone, even if there not with you, apart of them will be and that’s the part they left. The part that made you better. More complete. 			So never forget your yearn of her..


Details | Rhyme | |

Drop the ocean and lift the sky

Drop the ocean, lift the sky, Today seems like a goodbye, Memories of your voice forever linger. Drink the potion, get me high, Tears start to multiply , You wouldn't even try to lift a finger. Cast the demons, out of here, Lift me up, I have no fear, Show you what it means to say I love you. Wake me up, grab a beer, Fill my cup, and shed a tear , My love for you has always been this true. Drain the ocean , engulf the land, Time to focus , begin again, Learn to live without you by my side. Convey the notions, my own brand, Revolve my life, and take a stand, Without you , I know, I will be alright. Ring the bell, Sound the horn, Today i have been reborn, I can do this all on my own. Rise the fell, Mend the torn, Persevere through all the scorn, My , look at how much you have grown. Drop the ocean , lift the sky, Today seems like a goodbye, Memories of your voice forever linger.


Details | Lyric | |

Gotta Let Their Soul Cry

 Raped and Molestated in childhood, 
   Abused and Misused in pre-adulthood,
     Alone and confused they stood; feeling
       like tainted goods.

 Let their soul cry, maybe then; they can
  regain their pride. 

 They gotta let their soul cry

 Their darkest secret's they lock  away
   within, this is why their flesh constantly
    feast off sin; and everything in life has a
     beginning, but never render an ending.

 Let their soul cry, Crying is the only way to
  gain their piece of mind.
   
One might ask," Why"? Then , I will reply,"
  They need to see at least one day filled with
     promise rather than pain and see the sun
        without having rain.
     
 They gotta let their soul cry, before their sin
  cause their flesh to die.


Details | Rhyme | |

The BIble Is The Inspired Word Of God


The Bible Is The Inspired Word of God!

I heard someone say “the Bible was written by man.”
But there’s a truth I don’t think he understands.

God used man to simply be an “inspired instrument.”
This was more than some type of “experiment.”

God used many different people from various places.
He used them from both the Jewish and Gentile races!

Though the words spanned a long period of time…
They were written with all of us in mind!

It was as if God himself had taken the pen.
He spoke directly through different men.

All of the books are together with a common goal.
To bring the words of God to the common soul.

I would encourage to read the Bible for your direction.
Allow God’s words to daily be your inspiration!

Won’t you read from Genesis through Revelation?
You can learn about God’s gift of salvation!

The Bible speaks of God’s love and holiness too!
And speaks to the heart of how much HE LOVES YOU!

You can also learn about eternity in a heavenly mansion!
Your life can receive a blessed “abundant life expansion!”

Through the words of Christ, you’ll be blessed!
As you find in him a comfort and a haven of rest!

I invite you to read and apply God’s truth today!
And be transformed by what he really has to say!

By applying Biblical principles in how you’re living!
You’ll be blessed by the awesome words God is giving!

By Jim Pemberton  


Details | Rhyme | |

He's Gone

Why God; Why take him?
 
It’s not fair; not right.
 
So full of life to come,
 
Now gone in the night.
 
 
 
I loved him; we all did,
 
With his heart so pure.
 
Am I now to forgive
 
You, or lost forever more?
 
 
 
Why not take who’s to blame?
 
Could not wait to drink.
 
He’s gone; it’s not the same.
 
I’m lost; on the brink,
 
 
 
These walls are closing in
 
And the voices are screaming.
 
They want me to join him,
 
Just to end this suffering.
 
 
 
I won’t but not because of you.
 
For him; even in death I won’t
 
Disappoint him; I will stay true,
 
But it is a nice thought.
 
 
 
A thought to see his face,
 
And hear his velvet voice.
 
To delight in his embrace.
 
Then we could rejoice.
 
 
 
We could talk of the old days
 
How we caused childish havoc,
 
For everyone; all the crazy ways
 
We played; laughed till ecstatic
 
 
 
How we fought the others wars.
 
Even wiped the others tears.
 
Best friends; maybe something more,

 From first grade; for fourteen years.
 
 
 
For you I will carry on; keep charging through.
 
I can’t promise I won’t stumble along the way
 
Because blind I am without you,
 
Feeling along each passing day.
 
 
 

This poem is dedicated to
 
Derek Aaron Haynes
 
1-13-89 / 4-25-11


Details | Free verse | |

City of Shadows

A lonesome boat in the harbor rocks insanity.
Big waves of the black sea roll across the white sands
that fade into darkness for eternity.
Far from the life giving drops of rain are predators
in the city of shadows.
Feelings from the last solem breezes blow.
As the evening sun fades slowly into the night,
the pavement glistens like cracked glass
from the earlier evening rain.
A lack of silence remains.
In the city of shadows,
screaming voices creep in the corner of your mind.
Visions of the garden where the flowers died.
The dark alley reveals the emptiness of peace within your soul,
and death reveals the cold, cold truth way beneath the black crumbled earth.
Slapped with a strike of lightning,
disrupting the fall of silence where secrets crawl to hide,
in the foxholes of one's mind.
In the city of shadows, bewildered minds tick with the time of the clock.
Breath by breath falls perfectly out of place,
and darkness opens a new gate.
Tunes of the violin slowly fade away.
A new awakening to blindness,
in the city of shadows.


Details | Free verse | |

Venturing The World Above

A continuation of The World Above Me, a special collaberation between myself and my good friend Justin Connor

8/17/12
------------------------------------------------------------------

The shelter opens its door to the world above me
Never have I seen so much destruction

My eyes get used to the brightness,
An unwanted tear trickling down my cheek
But once they are accustomed to the light,
I want to close them again
I feel the urge to turn back
But they push me forward,
Whispering low, consoling words

I look around to see what humanity used to be
Before the devastation
And I marvel at what the old world used to be
But one question remains:
Why did people destroy their lives,
And end the world we used to know?

I walk my feet on the unknown terrain
Ruins. . .debris. . .the air placid and still
All around is rubbish
My mother whispers a prayer from behind
And then I wonder. . .
If God was ever here

As I look around I notice a book
Lying there, upon the ashy wreckage
I pick it up and read. . .
It details a nation’s fight for freedom

A large statue of a man is in the building I stand by
I stare at the brazen figure in awe
The features are crumbling but here it still stands
Watching over its obliterated land
I squeeze the book in my hand
His eyes show loyalty and courage
No sadness—not even a speck of fear

Looking more outwards I see a tall structure
And past that a building with a large dome
The architecture of the old world amazes me
What wonders men have done—could have done
If they hadn’t let each other come undone
In violence and death
Yet still I wonder how these incredible buildings 
Could possibly remain after all that has happened
Like the buildings, we have survived
And hopefully, through lessons learned,
We can thrive

My father tells everyone to clear away the ruins
People even use old machines with cranes
The old world is gone
But from the ashes we can start anew
We were in the shelter for the good of humanity
And now, because of us,
There is hope


Details | Couplet | |

I'm Sorry Part 2

I'm sorry for the ways I fight,
I'm sorry that I dim your light.

I'm sorry I'm so negative,
That I am so competative.

I'm sorry that I'm so outrageous,
I'm sorry my hurt's so contagious.

I don't want to see your heart eache,
Cuz when I do my heart it breaks.

I'm sorry that I'm not so strong,
But you inspire my hearts song.

I'm not alone cuz now I see,
Your light that's shining just for me.

I'm sorry that I'm up and down,
But, Dear, You win the patience crown.

My love for you's so strong, please see,
A fire burns for you in in me.

I know that It's hard to believe,
But God will help us, just you see.


Details | I do not know? | |

Today Is Terrible----

The cracked spine of
the book I dropped
at the call.
A chip in my
windshield left by a
pompous *?#@! in a
red sports car as I
drive to the
service.
Rain expectorating
from an ashen sky as
the dirt is turned.
Today is terrible.
Though this is less
terrible than the
crack in grandma’s
spine from her fall
down the stairs.
The chip in her
amazingly smart mind
after eighteen years
as a teacher.
Tears running,
dripping from my
Mothers ashen face
as she cries “My
mama’s dead.”
Today is terrible.
Though this is less
terrible than the
cracked family
emotions left raw
and empty.
The chip in Grandpas
numb mind at the
gathering… “Where is
Irene she should be
here?”
Faces gone ashen
with dread, do we
leave him numb or
remind him that his
wife is dead?
Today is terrible.
Though this is less
terrible than the
empty silences,
missing the jokes
Grandma used to
crack.
Grandma’s laugh and
her endless smile
which always exposed
that tooth with the
chip in it.
Without her the
world has become
empty, bleak, and
ashen.
Today is terrible.

                   
                   
                   
          Summer
Gratias


Details | Free verse | |

Wisps

"Friend,
Mind wandering through misty woods.
You don't understand your purpose.
Friend,
I knew you too little,
Please do not shed your salty emotions,
Not out of anger, not out of sadness.
Friend,
You now lose your way so easily,
You sink, you burst, you burn inwardly.
You weep from frustrations, 
From the guilt of an honest smile,
From pains, that you forget for a moment,
That come swiftly back to haunt you of your loss.
I understand, dear friend.
You once had a light and the woods seek to snuff it out.
Do not fear, dear friend,
Friend follow me, as I once did you.
Friend, now you see?
Yes, you see,
The little wisps in the fog that guide us home."

~In memory of Bill Hamman, and all else who have suffered the pains of Alzheimer's


Details | I do not know? | |

No Choice!

I hate it when I'm
       told to do
This damn thing
       or that.

And I hate it
When I don't do it
And am made to
      feel a rat!

So what is it that
      I hate much more
To do or not to do?

The former is within myself
      The latter within me, too!


Details | Classicism | |

Time

                  I miss you more and more everyday, That's why I drink so much to take this   pain away. The pain don't really go away it comes back, and I get so lost I don't know how to act. I get lost in my thoughts of you, It kills me you can't come back ever no matter what I do, This is the hardest thing I ever had to go threw. Some people say time will heal, but I know I'll be missing you still, It feels like I'm living in a bad nightmare I wish it wasn't real. If I could go back in time, I would go back and press rewind. I would go to that day the 2nd of July, and make sure you were okay and you didn't die. All I got got now are our memories and the tears I cry, To keep it together it's hard but believe me I try.


Details | Free verse | |

Any Ideas?

Well what should I write about tonight?

Should I write about what I did today?
Should I write about my shoelaces?
Should I write about doing laundry?
Or Should I write about what I'd like for breakfast tomorrow?

Maybe I should ramble about how the school day went.
Maybe I should complain about my room being dirty.
Maybe I should name off the food in my kitchen.
Or Maybe I should just talk about my hair.

I wanna talk about what I'm learning on guitar.
I wanna speak out about my inner issues.
I wanna yell a crazy rant.
I just wanna blow off some steam.

I wish I could take a bath with a girl right now.
I wish I would've finished my homework.
I wish I could shoot ice from my finger tips
I just wish I had some soda to quench my thirst.

There are so many things I could say right now!
But I just can't seem to decide.
I'd probably get some pretty weird looks
If I told you what's all bottled up inside.

I'm everywhere and nowhere in my head
Ideas and thoughts bouncing left and right.
Too bad I can't seem to think of anything.
I was really wanting to get some feelings out tonight.

Do I need to shave in the morning?
Should I go to the music store after school?
Why didn't I grab matching socks?
What does the weekend have in store?

I wish I had something to write about.
Any Ideas?

Eh, I'll think of something tomorrow night.


Details | Rhyme | |

Do You Have Movies And Magazines That Don't Belong In Your Home


I visited a garage sale.  And had a 
surprised look on my face.
I noticed that some things
 were "out of place."

To my right... Was a shelf filled with books.. 
And Christian ones too.
To my left...  Was a sign that read; 
"I have adult movies for you."

I wondered and thought with 
some kind of amazement.
"Does this person read these books. 
 And watch this "entertainment?"

This is common in many Christian homes...
Often...  People cross God's 
"boundaries" and "safety zones."

Anyone can go to church. 
 Pray, sing and "shed a tear."
Not realizing that sin's temptation
 is drawing ever so near.

Do you seek God's holiness and the 
power of Jesus' name?
But each night...  Before bedtime... 
 Things aren't quite the same...

Have you opened up your heart 
and mind...  And live life unfulfilled?
Is this the way you ought to live? 
 Is this what God has willed?

He desires to live inside of you.
  And help you to discover.
With any stronghold in life.  He'll help you to recover!

Are things in life "out of place?"  
And need to be put back together?
Allow God's word to guide you!  
His promises are forever!

Everything will be where it should be...  
With Jesus In control!
Only he can defeat the enemy that 
seeks to destroy your soul!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

Drowning in a box of condoms

    I'm a virgin. 
 Yet I'm a peer educator 
  I teach people about sex
    and how to put on the condom.
    sometimes the irony does bother me
 There's an endless supply of condoms 
     in my custody daily yet I have no need for them
     You should see the eager faces of the kids  
    grabbing them out of boxes like their gods best made gift
      I can't share in their glory 
      all I can do is watch 
        I hate  watching
         I'm mostly a doer not a witness
         So in this case I just feel out of place
             out of context
              Lost? Not exactly
              Cause i'm not exactly a saint
                  I probably know more than the one's who are active
                   which makes the irony even more ridiculous. 
                        But I guess it's just that need to be in with the crowd 
                            The need to feel like I belong
                               Less and less virgin's hang around these parts
                                   I'm starting to feel like i'm the only one left
                                             like i'm waiting for nothing. 
                                                         The condom box is calling out to me
                                                          The multiple flavors tempt me to taste. 
                                                                     Yet i'm still me. Therefore i'm lame. 
                                                                     Therefore i'm waiting...
                                                                    For what i'm not even sure anymore.
                                                                    I though it was because I was looking for the right guy 
                                                                     Maybe i'm just inept in this area. 
                                                    LoL that's a laugh. My body knows I'd  be a champ.
                                                                  But it also listens to my head. 
                                                                               Maybe that's what's the problem.
                                                                               Who knows? 
                                                                All I know is that i'm drowning in a box of condoms. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Whispers

I once heard a saying,
that the happiest people are the saddest
Shining because they’ve seen the darkest
Like the lotus that grows out of mud
Or the rotting stump that bears a bud..

You never know what troubles the mind
So be careful with words unkind
The glowing person just beside you
Could be a crumbling ruin behind the hairdo
 Most people struggle everyday
Souls burdened with decay..

I guess it takes a lot of courage
To act normal with that damage
Hard to believe that under the surface
Lives a soul with no purpose
A cry for help won’t be any crisper
Listen to the their inner whisper..


Details | I do not know? | |

I guess i was wrong

I thought we both felt the same, 
but i guess i was wrong
i thought you cared 
but i guess i was wrong
i thought i could trust you 
i thought you'd be there 
i thought of a lot of things
but most of all 
i thought you were my friend
but i guess i was wrong.


Details | Senryu | |

Countless Life

1, 2, 3
Down, and counting life
Three, two...one


Details | Couplet | |

Divisions Of A Philosophical Mind

Infant mind preferred scientist the best Whose brain worked off beat beneath a bird’s nest. Alas! Time told that I wasn’t at all gifted by god, So it was inconceivable to befriend sin, log and mod! Then was the school life, amazed with pilots and aero science, Flying free with strong wings was definitely nice! Someone told that people with hi-eyepower were not allowed The excuse was enough to drop the dream of being pilot-renowned. So I participated in school dramas with a secret fervor of acting, I was tired of seeing more and more talent; and decided of quitting. Music then became a part of my life; I started listening to all kinds I failed a school audition, so further working on it would be a sacrifice. So I began to grow tired of this endless game; grew tired of being tired And went on and on, writing this poem without fear of being fired! Because I had learnt my lesson too early, yet failed to see I had not There would certainly be better; hope was still to be the best shot.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Only Way

A life of pain and mistaken thoughts
Afew sliced veins a kid mistaught
A kids mistrust
His soul in tatters
To his wrist this razor was thrust
His dreams shattered
A life of lies
A kid misunderstood
His unheard cries
Wanting nothing but to cause some good
Sitting alone
Thinking of his past
His future unknown
For this day will be his last
Wanting only for this pain to be gone
Suicide, the only way he knows how
So he knows this dawn
It will be over now, all over
He grabs his blade
Holds it to his wrist
His life betrayed
Longing to feel its final kiss
He screams
Blood starting to gush
It was just like his dreams
Such a rush
He smiles knowing
The pain is over now
His blood if flowing
It was the only way he knew how


Details | Rhyme | |

I'm So Thankful That Christ Saved Me


I’m So Thankful That Christ Saved Me!

I’m so thankful that Christ chose to save me!
I’m grateful for the life that he gave me!

I’m so thankful for extending his warm embrace!
And for planting my life on a solid place!

I’m so thankful for all that God is doing!
His spirit in my life is what he is renewing!

I’m thankful for the opportunity to be 
one of his own!
I ask for his blessing in my life
 and home!

I’m forever grateful for his sacrifice
 on the cross!
He is my hope!  When all seems
 hopeless and lost!

Thank you my Lord for being so gracious to me!
You have given me your grace abundantly!

Thank you Jesus for being my friend!
How I love you again and again!

You are the one that I cherish and adore!
You’ve given me hope and peace 
and so much more!

By Jim Pemberton    


Details | I do not know? | |

Alone I Stand

In frozen ivory towers and burning dungeons
The inescapable truth is that in the darkness
Even your shadow leaves you
Stare at the abyss and the void fills you
Your mind trapped as you hide your black-hole heart
Shadows lurking out of sight
Manifestations surround you
the journey of the hopeless soul
Is it a lesson that must be endured
To make the heart steady
So that when you reach the end
You truly appreciate how bad it could have been
And what you’re capable of
So that you know that you all need
Is your beating heart and nothing else
Just you
Believing in a dream..
Something that
The darkness
Can’t touch.


Details | I do not know? | |

Can You See Me?

Mommy can you see me?
I can bounce really high!
Maybe with some bouncy shoes
I can visit you in the sky!
I'm seven years old now Mommy.
You've been gone about a year.
I can't wait to see you Mommy, 
and your memories are near.

Mommy can you see me?
Oops- I failed another test.
But I remembered what you told me
and I tried my very best.
I'm ten years old now Mommy.
You've been gone about four years.
I really miss you Mommy,
and I wish you were here.

Mommy can you see me?
Dad went off on me again.
I slit my wrists to ease the pain, 
I have scars all over my skin. 
I'm fourteen years old now Mommy, 
you've been gone about eight years. 
Who are you anyways Mommy?
Thanks a lot for leaving me in tears...

Mommy can you see me?
I'm so glad I finally changed!
In accepted Jesus like you once did
so my life could be rearranged.
I'm sixteen years old now Mommy, 
you've missed the past ten years.
But I'll see you in heaven Mommy, 
and that helps me fight my fears. 


Details | Free verse | |

Darkness

Complete darkness
No sound at all
This is where you live
No one to talk to
The blackness, engulfing
Smothering the air out of you
In this vast void with lack of light
You are forced to believe
That you see a speck
A tiny green light
Way off in the distance
This blot of light brings so much hope
So many desires
You can hardly breath
Suddenly the light grows larger
You feel elated
Then FLASH
Complete darkness
No sound at all
Things are back
To the way they will always be


Details | Lyric | |

Borderline's Wreckage

I'm Agonizing every Word that my mind Creates You've done this all to me release your wrath to Me You wonder How much a Human Heart can take I've reached the limit You've invaded me on every level none of this is Mine anymore I can't bleed enough for You We're through This, This Torture Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You Feel Free to abuse If it's you I won't lose The Winds push away The Vines pull forth I'm at a lose on what to do So very lost and Confused Don't say we're through Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You I Hate you ...Don't leave me I push you so far away But need you so close I'm on the edge you're all I really need I'll do anything Just don't Abandoned me leaving has it's toll Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You


Details | Free verse | |

If you had a name (An ode to loss and water)

If the lovely breeze had a name
we could drift together as two dandelion wishes
floating wanton on foamy winds.
If the river were rolling, gently
we could slide in and swim
for hours, without rushing
and love is like that.
Love is like still water
standing so deep in a vessel
 yet so easily broken upon the smallest of stones;
scattered, and yet-
from this another river begins
(as you begin)
How lovely if you had a name
I would call out to you
and I would hear your reply as
the wind blowing, the water rushing
and not your echoes
 as you trickled across so many small, jagged stones


Details | Rhyme | |

Dreams

Imagine that you had something,
Imagine that you had.
Not knowing it would come to be,
But then you might be glad.

Yet now you think what it would do,
Yet now you wouldn't know.
Until you do you never know,
Of how you'd need to grow.

But when a dream does come by,
But when a dream might be.
You need to see what might be true,
And find reality.


Details | Free verse | |

For What's Worth Breathing


Look at me
I am the life in a wasteland

Look at me
I am the slavery through the ages

Look at me
I am the mirror of the world

Look at me
I am the illusion I’ve fought for

Look at me
I’m still loving you

and I keep being here

for you, for me,
and for what’s worth breathing


Details | I do not know? | |

What If

Hey people why you listen to the people that don’t matter. You all get mad when the talk 
sh&t and when they put you down. Why do you think they continue to do it? It is because 
they get a reaction out of you and it drives them to get more. They feel like they have 
control over you and they are your masters and its pathetic. I’m not innocent no one is. 
Everyone does it either because they have had it done to them or because they feel like 
they have to be noticed. I’ve realized if you just laugh and completely ignore them you will 
have a better life and it will make life out to be better then what you thought it could ever 
be.  I know I can’t say I’m fully able to ignore everyone but it’s a process I have made a lot 
of progress and I have learned I am a lot happier and feel way better when I just laugh or 
walk away. If people actually stopped and didn’t say anything and laughed about it more 
people would stop bullying. I know it’s very hard to believe me and it’s a process I think 
everyone needs to take. Who are they to judge you? You are the only one who needs to 
accept you for you. If you can’t accept what you are and what your personality is without 
being embarrassed about it you can’t live with anyone else. If you stop right now and think 
about all of the times you retaliated and said something back at the person that was 
bothering you did it get better or did it get worse and ay what if I don’t say anything maybe I 
won’t get angry and maybe they will leave me alone. If you can take the first step even 
though it is the hardest one there is to take you will have a better outlook on life and 
yourself and you will be happier then you could ever imagine.  I don’t care who you are if 
you will only make the first step the next steps are a lot easier and you will learn to live life 
to the fullest and it will make you have more friends and you will have a better life style and 
you will have more fun instead of always being mad and sad and depressed. If everyone in 
the world would just take that one fateful step it would make all of the difference.


Details | Narrative | |

this was me

it began so innocently
we exchanged ideas on poetry
his art, the suffering he endured
he preyed upon my compassion
as he meticulously bided his time...

i felt safe as we expressed
our mutual love of words
i was excited, i was learning,
unbeknowst to me, i was his prey..

many months and thousands of hours, 
talking, reaffirmed my trust; faith in him
he shared his life, triumps & tragedies
i supported all he desired for himself..

i understood, i felt his pain, 
his drive i admired, he overcame tremedous odds,
became a doctor so others would not suffer as he had;
he baited me; the innocent and naieve one.

living life with no regret,
i chose to take a leap of faith,
he guided me, alleviated my fears,
of promises to cherish and adore me..

as a tiger waits patiently to pounce on his prey
i was oblivious to his hatred inside,
he was a master of manipulation
his mission - to destroy me..

i felt he was worth giving 
up all i knew to build a life
he so lovingly described to me,
little did i know, his words - poison..

america bound i left everything i knew; i loved.
the terror of his drunken rages, his icy silence,
the cruelty of his words stung like red hot coals.
what he admired most about me,intensified his hatred.

the vacancy in his eyes was terrifying, 
i was alone in a strange country, 
knowing no one, in a house, not a home, 
full of tension, rage, abuse; numb and in shock;
this was my reality..

with each painstaking day of living in terror
dreading his arrival, my fear reached new heights;
i had enough; i was leaving.
his rage increased, his words pure venom..

i was numb, shaking, fear drove me to action
he became desperate, i did not sleep 
for fear of never waking, his actions so terrifying
i felt a strength within, empowering me..

planning my escape, fear became my ally,
i reached the airport and did not stop shaking
until safely on the plane, doors shut, 
moving down the runway to take-off;
i wept, i crumbled, i collapsed.

jubilantly at home, i felt peace, safe, 
and soaked in the beauty of my freedom; my home.
it has been six weeks; i have flashbacks, 
terror still haunts me; i am determined 
to not let another change me.

i am healing and am grateful for every
moment i smile, smell a flower, witness
the marvel of each sunrise and sunset.
i am a blessed girl.

~this was me~ 


Details | Verse | |

Sand is in my Eye (to Vandetta)

I still feel my life like sand through your fingers
Falling in the winds swish and rumble of the world
And in every grain of my being lingers
Still the roar of pain in the silence where I am hurled
Sand is in my eye, Each grain a different memory
Salt the tears I cry, Each pain a different history

I dreamed of you all my life, and desired that you yield
Only long enough for me to yield my all to you
But just when love rose like a Babel me, I could not seal
Your faith in simple truth, nor pride my care renew
We were as broken as a tide
Each drift of separation became more wide

Ah, but it was not you nor I at fault for fear but us
For in all the time we loved before we came to this
With only a fragment of the self and full of old dust
And broken in the place where life stores its bliss
Today I think, would I have given all before
To sit on sand and watch us united as we soar

You rushed me into it, and there my weakness began
For somehow I see in soaring birds also a dance
And every dance is perfect when led by the man.
And shall I learn again to be strong now, and find my chance
Sand is in my eye, each grain a different memory
Salt the tears I cry, each pain a different history.








Details | Free verse | |

Jesus in a Hat

I can only seem to watch over the world,
as it sleeps.

With my eyes closed tightly and a motion of minds' breath,
I can see brief glimpses of where I need to be,
to find my rest.

It's so beautifully odd....
like seeing Jesus in a hat.

I've taken many a circle walk, at night.

I've stopped and kissed Lestat,
while stealing lilacs in the comfort of the dark.

I suck on the candied faith,
that somehow grows from the pores of the peaceful.

I do all this, while sitting on the curb.

Standing, may cause my balance to drip,
but I will learn to dance,
inside the timesteps.


Details | Free verse | |

The Doll

10-21-12

Like Sally I sense tragedy’s at hand For this heart can only sew so much Until all string is used to the last strand Hanging dolls staring at my lonesome self I wish I was more than what they see If only they’d welcome me on their shelf My porcelain skin would win over all Inanimate beings look alive at my face As I let my angriest plastic tear fall I can’t be SxTxIxTxCxHxExD this time. . . I can’t be displayed. . . I can’t remove the grime I’ve become the doll And we all sense the worst A happy ending for them all And when they finally welcome me to their shelf It is empty and caked with dust Leaving me staring. . . at MxYxSxExLxF Like Sally I sensed tragedy at hand But unlike her, that’s how I stay I stay. I stay. I stay. SxTxOxP. . . IxT IxS SxTxAxRxIxNxG AxGxAxIxN. . . SxHxE WxOxNxT LxExT MxE SxLxExExP SxHxE HxAxTxExS MxE. . .


Details | Free verse | |

Spill It

Spill it all out
Where is the light to guide these words?
Everything feels gone 
Empty again 
So spilling it out is impossible?
Yet words still flow through it all
Thoughts still run rampant
Broken pipework spraying all over the place
Rust collecting on the spurting silver
Losing very inch of pride
Unable to control these lines
Pinch it all out
Squeeze it like the last bits of toothpaste in a tube
Roll it up and twist the remains
Pressure is building
Tension is steadily, stiffly waiting
To be released
Let it all go!
There is no point anymore
Stop building on disaster!
Let the words flow
Spill the damn mess out
And don't clean up
Let me pick up the pieces
Hand me the mop
Because when it is finally all out
The emptiness will leave 
You'll know exactly what to express
It will all be clear


4-20-13


Details | Rhyme | |

The unknown life we lead.

The life that I lead is unknown to me,

How can this be? you ask me,

Well you see I live in a land that is free.


Details | Lyric | |

Mockingbird Still Sings

Children sexually abused
Hiding secrets none accused 
Mockingbird still sings

False Charities stealing money
Laughing while nothing’s funny
Mockingbird still sings

Corporations shredding evidence
Seas of hypocrisy and decadence
Mockingbird still sings

Cheating partners losing trust
Teens pregnant from a night of lust
Mockingbird still sings

Rape victims ashamed to speak
Lives destroyed remaining meek 
Mockingbird still sings

Middle East raging in war
All for pride nothing more
Mockingbird still sings

Delicate babies addicts born
Crack whore moms selling porn
Mockingbird still sings

Gang bangers need attention
Killing for an honorable mention 
Mockingbird still sings

Fools and vengeance shall expire
For winds of change to transpire
While mockingbird still sings


Details | Haiku | |

A Gaga Gadfly

a gaga gadfly 
on a water buffalo
touch me not, i rule


Details | Free verse | |

The Past Haunts Me

The past is what haunts me.
Its what kicks me down.
Its what follows me...
I used to get bullied at school, all the time.
And i have noticed, that it is slowly coming back..
And i find myself asking "Why me?"
I find myself wondering why it is coming back...
Im thinking "Will it ever end? Or just keep coming back to haunt me?"
I cant take this anymore,
It is killing me inside.
I feel like nothing.
I feel as if i am alone.
I feel as if i have nothing.
I feel as if no one cares.
No one, no one understands.
I feel as if im living in my past.
I cant take this anymore,
Its just to much..
I want to leave..
But i cant get myself to do it..
So i shall wait..
Until the day..
That i can leave..
And leave this world happy,
Without me..


Details | Free verse | |

Shadows

As the moon aligns itself with the stars
I search to find me
Can’t find my way
My psyche is perplexed
Seemingly, I long to be found
Yet, I have left no trail of sanity
Left no footprints of sincerity 
Silhouettes are numerous
Where I was last portrayed
A mire outline, a profile
A mirage
Depicts the whereabouts of my mind
Illusions and premonitions
Forebode life
Foreshadow the inhabitation of despair
Predict the transition into solitude
Sheer hues of the deep, dark night
Diversify the challenge of discovery
Still I search
Overlooking not one possibility
Though my vision impaired
I continue franticly 
Seeking for myself
Among the many shadows  


Details | Rhyme | |

From The Time After God's Creation


From The Time After God's Creation… From the time after God’s beautiful creation… Between man and God… Sin has caused a separation! When God looked down upon all of mankind. Fellowship with man was what he had in mind! We were all created to bring honor to his name. But sin has brought much wickedness and shame! Sin has created an enormous “moral cavity.” Mankind has reached an “immoral depravity!” Through God’s son, a way has been made. His life for yours, on Calvary, was paid! Though mankind sinned, God didn’t forget us! Jesus is here right now! He never left us! Through Christ’ blood, our lives can be cleansed! A new life in Christ is where victory begins! Won’t you come to the Lord who created you? It is no secret how much he loves you! Won’t you come? Why there’s still time? God has a purpose and a plan with you in mind! His grace and love can change you throughout! Knowing Jesus is what true life is all about! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

RULED BY EMOTIONS

I will not be 
ruled by my 
emotions,
Thus I shan’t 
love,
I can’t hate,
I won’t live,
I shall 
obliterate,
Like spoken 
word with no 
debate,
You and I are 
no duplicate,
My body shall 
be a suitcase,
Organs packed 
like folded 
clothes,
Just like an 
open shoe you 
see the toes,
Thus no friends 
and many are 
foes,
No happiness 
only woes,
Because that’s 
the way the 
robot goes,
Neither smile 
nor tear must 
flow,
Not a fright 
when appears a 
crow,
At full power 
alone do my 
eyes glow,
To get no love 
and give none 
back,
To obey, serve,
To torture my 
humanity,
And smother my 
substance,
For everyone 
else? For 
nothing?


Details | I do not know? | |

I never saw it coming

I never saw it coming 
It just crept up unawares
Probably this morning
Whilst I was still upstairs
I thought I caught a glimpse 
As I had my tea and toast
For just a fleeting moment
Like a phantom or a ghost
It was later that it hit me
And the feeling left me cold
I realised that suddenly
I’d gotten bloody old
Looking in the mirror
For reflections never lie
I saw a total stranger
And he looked me in the eye
Reflecting on the image
And all that I could see
Sadly I concluded
That this, was really me

……………………………….......I never saw it coming 


© John W Fenn  20-08-2009


Details | Lyric | |

Why Must It Be

Can I let you go? Will you be okay? Where you're headed now...to a better place Listen to my words of forgiveness relieving this pain I'd give anything to have you back again To hold you once more in my arms, one more day of happiness you now dwell within my heart Your innocent smile is forever a distant memory, and the times that we share are precious treasures that I spend reliving The Shadow of Death Took you in just one breath Why must it be? I cry behind this closed door, searching desperately for an answer, yet all I feel is an emptiness inside... despair haunts me forevermore Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave? Why does this have to hurt? Cancer robbed thy life from thee... Why must it be? Fly away Angel Child of Mine Trod thy broken paths, roam away, fly and be free... Why must it be?


Details | Quatrain | |

Minor Discomfort

Does everybody feel the same as I do?
Lost? Adrift? Disconnected? Confused?
Does anyone know how to ease the hurt of truth
For the accuser, as well as the accused?

I've heard there's bliss
Found somewhere in ignorance
For those who have been stripped
Of their already fleeting innocence

So I continue to move through this life
Practiced smile, that doesn't quite reach my eyes
Which instead reflect the emptiness
That fills me up inside

It hurts to feel so alone and uncertain
Consumed by doubt and fear
Eventually life becomes a burden
Damaged beyond all repair

The temptation to numb all sensation
It more powerful than one might believe
I'll sacrifice the pleasure, to relieve the devastation
As passion gives way to apathy

Say whatever you want
About those who dwell on the past
Go ahead and judge me from your moral soapbox
While you cower behind your mask

The opinions of most matter very little to me
It won't be taken to heart as you intend it to be
First you'd have to practice the words you preach
If you ever do then I promise I'll start listening


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost and found

Searching
pacing
fretting
losing

Freak out!

Breaking 
crashing
burning
crushing

Time lost!

Up 
down
left 
right

Which way?

Lost 
gone
forgotton
never

Finally found!


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Crossroads- A night flight

I can hear the silence again
I can take back the time to think, to feel, to just 
breathe.
I have held out my hand to slow down time
and I have floated back down to myself
returned to my body for a while, you see;
I am here just on loan.
I dont know if I can lose myself again, 
lose myself to the fear of living, fear of the inevitable, fear of pain inescapable
so I think I'm just gonna ride on out on this illusion wave
and, you know- 
If you find a rock to cling to, and it breaks away suddenly, and you find another 
rock to cling to,
and it also uproots itself as well,
and you feel uneasy without solid ground
you gotta just learn how to be at ease with floating
till you gather the courage to fly away
into the unknown
and pardon my sudden departure.
but the next flight is at 12 sharp
and its already a quarter to midnight


Details | Free verse | |

I IMAGINE

I imagine a universe without god
What a powerful man !
I imagine a world without man
What a lovely place !
I imagine a country without politicians
What a peaceful land !
I imagine daily trade without businessmen
What a simple life !
I imagine a way of life without machines
What a romantic life !
I imagine a day without women
What a quiet day of rest !
But when I imagine my own self without you
Who I am then …


Details | Acrostic | |

FOR RENT

Frame is solid, some refurbishing needed; I have a room for rent
Only needs a few repairs and my patience has well been spent
Ready for immediate occupancy as soon as one can spare

Renovations commencing instantly; rent is somewhat fair 
Equipped with all the essentials; a spacious room is what you’ll find
Needs an well organized individual; one able to dwell inside this mind 
Today it’s clean and tidy as can be; tomorrow's a new day, I'll wait and see 

© Stacy Lynn Stiles


Details | Free verse | |

In the Shallows

           I bent over to touch my toes
               and the ground tore open like a backbone.

I tried to feed myself the sky;
to splice my tearducts into the universe 
so that, when the pavement cried, it would mean something to me.
My fingernails punctured that slimy membrane
congealed with stars, 
and I brought a slice of it to my lips,
hot and slippery like a jellyfish.
Peach juice, chalky-sweet, flowed,
fleshy particles snagged in my teeth,
and the colors erupted within my mouth.

Synthesia took over my lungs.
The hollows between my knuckles flooded with synovia
and all the ectoplasm threatened to separate from my cells
with a sound like thunder.
Diphthong tasted rusty like leukoplakia as it tiptoed across my tongue.
Tomorrow rose like the skeletons of trees, 
groping for a feeling similar to catharsis
[catharsis tender as the broken wings of doves,
crunching underfoot like shattered glass.]

The clouds opened their thunderous maws
- teeth snicker-snacking, lamplight-eyes flaming the color of E#'s -
and consumed me.
I felt my skin turn to something other than skin:
thick and rough with scales,
my fingerprints melting into something waxen, smooth and opaque,
like pomegranate kisses on coffee mugs.
A feeling ignited deep in my structure;
cedillas blossoming like lilies from my lips,
fragmented sentences stretching taut as guitar strings
between my thumb and forefingers.  
A flutter gentle and demonic as Calcifer erupted from my system
- splattering hot and frothing into my hand -
and fluid rushed in.

   I dared to taste oblivion,
       and the sky swallowed me. 

My lungs failed to be lungs.
They flooded with caustic matter,
and I coughed up reflections sharp as fiberglass;
fighting with organs phthisical and sore.
I struggled to find a way to describe it:
the feeling of consuming something greater than yourself,
of opening your eyes and tasting the sound of rain.
It was like swimming, 
but inside out.

            I bent over to touch my toes,
              and my spine tore open;
            the loose laces unraveling, veterbrae poking out
          like the tines of forks.
            I tried to contort myself into the beginning,
              but I only found where I end.


Details | I do not know? | |

my oxygen

At this very moment you are the oxygen i breathe and i just can't handle that tomorrow you could be another person that il never see again i don't wanna always regret that i never said something more too you i'm sorry but you get my blood pumping so fast it feels like time slows down the words you spoke today mended pieces of me that have been broken my entire life the words you spoke today gave me strength i will no longer fear what i am..... me? i'm a human being with a voice and with this voice i will shake the very foundation of those who attempt to hurt our beautiful existence i mean no harm and i don't expect you to say anything back to me but you mean more to me then you will ever understand i've drempt of you since i was young before i had ever seen your face i felt your pressence your a fresh breathe of air to a tainted existence


Details | Lyric | |

Tears

A great day ending in tragedy
now you wait until you get the news
I was scattered in different forms
The car door was slammed into my side
The doctor walks in to give you the news
You fall to the floor
Tears falling from your face
Your makeup running down unto your clothes
Making a stain where your heart used to be
I took you back into the darkest place of my soul
Something was different more darker than before
Now you wait until the funeral of your lost love
Your standing in the corner
Your face is covered in darkness
The blood runs from your eyes
How it hurts in the worst way now that im gone
Your realizing how much i meant to you
Something you havent seen before
Your blindness fades away as you start to see
You fall to the floor fainting
No one picks you up
They drop my casket into my little hole
Where i will stay all life long
How your tears fall unto the ground
Getting soaked up by the soil
Drowning me in your tears
Admire the past no more ways to see the future
Now that your starting to love me more
You wait until you see me in a dream
Dying like the past
As your moving on i fade away
I am no longer alive
You left me behind


Details | Narrative | |

A Story

It was on a Christmas Eve
early in the morn
into a world so often cold
a little girl was born.
Her parents, they did love her,
the way that it should be
but her father, who's a good man,
had been raised with cruelty.

When he doled out punishment
for all her childish ways
the lessons that he taught her
would stay with her all her days.
Growing up was never easy
and she grew up so confused.
Other kids did more than tease her
and at home she was abused.

But she grew up all the same
then came to that time of life
when she thought she was ready
became a mother and a wife.
They faced a lot of hardships
but tried to love anyway
and her husband, who does love her,
has been so mean along the way.

Yes, life is hard for everyone
this woman surely knows.
Hate and misunderstanding
seems to follow where she goes
with so many quick to tell her
that she is always wrong
so many times she has been shown
that she just don't belong.

She tries so hard to understand
the reasons for her tears
and is punished for her feelings
as she has been all her years.
She knows that there is more to life
than what always seems to be.
All she wants is to be loved
without the cruelty.



Note:  My dear friends, this is not an easy write for me but a necessary one.  I was at a very 
low point in my life and I prayed for God for direction or to let it end.  I wrote the poem I Am 
then joined PoetrySoup.  I know God led me to this wonderful site for a reason.  I may still 
have a long way to go but I am starting to move forward.  I want to thank you all for your 
encouragement and kindness.  Being able to write again is helping me and as fellow writers, 
I know you understand.  Thank you for sharing with me and teaching to become a better 
writer.  God bless you all and Happy Holidays!  Love, Robin.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Winds of the Night

The winds of the night creep in on you and they are up and about.
They surround you in the darkness and shed you into some light.
They are given and they are taken with your most silent thoughts.
They pass through your hidden fears and come from plain sight.
The winds of the night so clever and discreet they really are.
They hold no boundaries to your beginning and nor to your end.
They are warm and they are cold rising above you and reaching up from far.
They are of their own power and hold onto all claims of their own.
The winds of the night come sending a message to the unknown.
The winds of the night are aimless but when directed they drift all together.
They are dangerous when calm at night a sight not even one has really seen.
They are unsettled with no balance yet predictable by where they all concur.
They capture what is felt and heard because they’re accepted as they’re deemed.
The winds of the night come and go for they are on a lifelong mission.
They are silent within your journey for they can not be spoken to or touched.
They exist for your life bringing the world into its final rule on deception.
The winds of the night carry enough strength to lead a massive world into the unjust!








Details | Personification | |

Just A Dream

It crept up on me by surprise.
You were like a gift from God.
So sweet and tender you were the perfect
angel.
You'd kiss me so softly touch me so gentle.
Every moment was like heaven.
I'd close my eyes only to think of you.
And open them only to realize it was a dream.
A dream is what you were.
A  pigment of my imagination.
Every touch, Every kiss was just a halusination.
Everything I thought you were or could be left me hurt and
confused.
The man I've been waiting so long for.
The one that would love me like no other.
Not afraid to show any emotions.
I believe how deeply you loved and cared for me.
Only to find out you never existed.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Battle of My Heart

Run, run, run, run
As far as the wind would bring
Away from the battlefield i run
To the destiny and fate i would cling

So it seems I could go on no more
So it seems i couldn't take another step
In my heart, this feeling can no longer be ignored
This heart vowed a promise that can't be kept

Someone save this tormented heart
Save me from the hell of this world
Nay, stay away, keep us apart
I don't understand why to me you're cruel

With my within i'm battling
But it seems strength i'm lacking
Even if by my side warriors are standing
I still kept on running...

I raise my open palms
I pray to the Supreme Lord
Grant me strength and make me calm
Defeat the enemy i fought

Now I have a strength anew
My warning he did not abide
Now, the world say goodbye to you
Restoring instantly my limping pride

So now my enemy has fallen
I rise into power once again
My heart is now strengthen
No longer it endure the pain.


Details | I do not know? | |

Be A Good Kid And Roll Me A Joint

When you are nine years old 
and sifting the seeds out 
of your parents pot for them, 
you can't really preach 
about the dangers of cigarettes
and second-hand smoke...
even though you know them.

You know better than to miss a seed
and let it ''pop'' while they are smoking it.
''What are you lazy or just too stupid? ''
''Is it really that hard to make sure 
all the seeds are out? ''

Once you've proven yourself with the sifting job, 
maybe they'll think enough of you 
to actually let you roll one.
If you're lucky.
Then you're a real ''big helper''.
Then they really like having you around.
Because they love you.

But, if you're stupid enough 
to roll a joint that isn't tight 
or comes apart while they're smoking it...
you'll be sorry.
Because then they'll tell all their friends 
just how stupid their worthless kid is.
''Stupid kid.
Can't even roll a good joint.
What good are you''? 

Just wait...you're almost ten.
Then they'll have you smoke one yourself.
''It'll make you much cooler.
Because you're such a dork.
You really need help''. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Your Gone

As the tears fall down from my face,
I think about that magical place.
You took me there when I was young,
but that was before the pain begun.
You walked me down the road of life,
preparing me to be a mother and a wife.
You would hold my hand and say have no fear,
mommy's not going anywhere, I'll always be here.
But that was wrong and so were you,
you left me mom, what am I to do?
I've been told life goes on,
but it can't be, because you're still gone.
I pray at night to see you in my dreams,
but you're never there, just terror and screams.
How could this happen, how could this be?
The woman I love so dearly up and left me.
I go to the grave every afternoon,
I sang our favorite song, it was a nice little tune.
But since your gone I've changed some things,
about marriage and babies and diamond rings.
Those things are not important to me now,
I ask myself, how did this happen, when and how?
You let yourself go to that place in the sky,
but it happened so sudden mom, please tell me why?
You left me a note by your bed,
you wrote moments before you ended up dead.
Please tell me why you took your own life,
you were a such loving mother and a dear wife.
You didn't write much, just a few lines,
to tell me you love me, and it would be better in time.
But now that your gone, it's not better at all,
I just lay in my bed, I scream and I bawl.
To know what you done, it's too hard to bare,
I stand at your grave with a cold desperate stare.
You were a daughter, a loving mother, and a dear wife,
Why did you do it mom, why did you use that knife?
I wonder everyday, it's all I think about,
There's only one thing it could be, without a doubt.
You went to a dark place, filled with murder and thugs,
I know why I lost you mom, you could no longer fight the drugs.
You could have reached out and told someone before,
now it's too late, death has already knocked and opened your door. 
I'm sorry, so sorry, I could not see,
the reason you are dead is because of me.
I wasn't there to help when you needed me most,
Now I can't see you, not an image or a ghost.
I've answered my question, I just waited too long,
I know my mistake now, but it's too late, your gone.


Details | Lyric | |

Never

There were times when I was scared
And it was only left for me to cry
I was left behind the walls of my life
And you watched me as I fallen to die

You were never there
You have never care
Because I am just a shadow in your eyes
And you are always pretended to be blind

Now, my world is turning again
All I could feel is nothing but pain
Hope this will be off my head soon
Although forgetting was in vain


Details | Rhyme | |

Feeling Something Real

Warm inclinations, 
One off conversations,
Unquestioned accusations,
Endless limitations.
 
Frustrating drama,
Devastating karma,
Countless lies,
Tearful goodbyes.
 
Hidden treasures,
Forgotten pleasures,
Forbidden temptation,
Lost in translation,
Blind realisation.
 
Unchartered oceans,
Half cocked notions,
Chance meeting,
Designated seating,
Bank balance depleting.
 
Emotional prostitution,
Computer revolution,
Positive solutions,
New year resolutions.


Details | Free verse | |

The Fork In The Path

The Fork In The Path

Where does this trail go?
Does it lead through meadows with gently flowing grass?
Flowers dancing in the warm breezes from distant mountains
Bees and birds flying among wispy clouds
With the scent of violet relaxes the mood of the land
Does it lead into a sunset where the daylight fades into night?
Stars fight to be seen in the dimming light
The chirping of birds is long gone
Replaced by the baying of wolves looking for a mate
Does it lead into the infinite darkness of night?
Only lit by the light of a billion distant stars
So faint that it remains a world without light or shadow
Sounds of a distant world break up the silence
An unseen choir of life and death
Where does this trail go?
Three forks coming from the path that life offers
All well-worn and all unmarked
There is no way to be certain which is correct
No way to do other than hope you choose the right one
Light or dark it is your choice to make
On your own
All alone
Just you and a fork on the path with a choice to make


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost And Alone

Have you ever been so lost that you feel that you will never find your way out, That 
the whole world has moved on and left you behind. You want someone to come 
find you make things ok again but as you look as far as you can see there is 
never anyone there. You yell for help but again no one is there to hear you. You 
can run but there is no end no way out. You just stop and sit there waiting hoping 
to be found to be some were you belong be loved and cared for, The air keeps 
getting colder and the loneliness darkens you. You start asking God why? But he 
never answers, You think is he even there is he real? guess not you know that 
people in the world have it worse then you but that don't mean you pain don't 
count, It hurts the life you once knew and loved not a perfect one but it was yours 
now is gone, Will you ever find your way back, belong some were? As the night 
comes you lay there and cry yourself to sleep trying to get all the answers your 
heart needs but like you the answers are lost. As you sleep you dream of the life 
you wanted a happy one but then as you start to smile something reminds you of 
what is now gone, And you are lost all over again. Maybe Someday I will be found 
and the world will be right again.


Details | Carpe Diem | |

thoughts of the oppressed

Feelthe love and feel the pain, as i walk through the valley of the shadow of 
death, entangled with evils that possesed. Making  my life such a mess i could 
not find a methodology that could justify such a tragedy, developing my life into 
such a misery, lost in the wilderness & looking for harmony. Please allow me to 
give you some of my insanity what relevance it may have is beyond me. Looking 
over my shoulders at times that are best, who will be my saviour and sweet 
caress & wipe away the prolonged misery. Perhaps love is the only thing that can 
save me, or is it the only remedy is  blissful insanity ?


Details | Free verse | |

Of Fences

He's aware
of the yard he lives in --

aware of the fences
that define
his constant existence

He feels his life
is missing
from the world
outside those fences --

He's very afraid
of what lies beyond them, feels
very safe,
having such a perimeter
contain his life --

and yet,
just
yet,

when roaring lightning
cracks storms into his skies,

all he can think of, all
he's impelled towards,

from the very deep in-side-
out of his soul

is to panic & bolt,
cause himself even bodily harm
just to
find a way
out, find a way
to dig free, to
leave those fences behind --

to run amuck, un-
entrapped, seeking
freedom from fear
in the very places
that he sees as offering
no safety, no
familiarity

Then, when he calms
down,
when he's done
with his run,

the sole object burning
in his primitive mind
is to seek again
the warmth and comfort
of familiarity and safety,

and he
returns to his yard,
settles back down within his fences,
and pretends to himself
that he'll never --
No, he'll never

do that scary thing
ever again and then,
as if to prove it to himself,
to convince himself he
really means it this time

he enters into the house
yarded by those fences
and goes to sleep, goes
unconscious,

and dreams of freedom
inside the walls
of the house inside the yard,

in the center
of the fences
that circumscribe his world


Details | I do not know? | |

The Light

~The Light~

I remember the first time
 Voices in my head getting way too loud
Just a little girl unable to enjoy the world around me
I thought there was no way out
Almost took the easy way out
Then I saw something shining at the end of a long dark tunnel
It gave me hope
A reason to believe
As long as I kept my focus on

~The Light~

Thirteen and so very young
Afraid to tell a soul
About the demons in my head
I thought that I had to deal with them 
For myself by myself
Until I slipped and told a friend
Finding out she heard them sometimes too
Helped me feel a little better
It is just too bad she never had a chance to see
Brightness at the end of her tunnel
After she moved away
She just gave up 
Walking away from 

~The Light	~

I felt so bad 
Yet I managed to hide the pain
I always felt inside
Even in my darkest hours
With many attempts behind me 
I kept hoping to see

~The Light~

It is beautiful to see how a family can rescue 
Their fallen 
Just not giving up
Always feeling their unconditional love 
Knowing they were there
It all helped me walk out of that dark tunnel
Embracing

~The Light~

Now I firmly believe it is possible
For the most troubled soul
To find a way out
Without taking the easy way
With love and support
I know you can do it too
As you go through life’s journey
Wherever it may take you 
Always remember to look for and 
Embrace 

~The Light	~

By: Jean Shular


Details | I do not know? | |

Dead Beat Dad

Excuse me sir, can we talk for awhile?
Can we discuss the needs of both of our child?
How is it that you can just walk away,
From a baby we made, and I have to stay.
It's funny you see, I don't understand,
How you can leave your child and still be a man.
How you can go out each night and meet new girls,
And exclude your own child as part of your world.
They think you're so charming with your looks and style,
But would you still be so charming if this was their child?
I couldn't keep you away from me
Before we laid down as two and woke up as three.
Look at his eyes and all his toes,
He has your smile and button noes.
So give him a chance it's not that bad,
Because it's too much work being both mom and dad!


Details | Prose Poetry | |

That Which Is Real

Oh to be just a friend
To laugh, joke and play with you
Is not something
I know how to do
Oh how I wish it were
For it’d sure eliminate
All this pain I feel
Sometimes it happens
That starting off fun
Turns into something real
And what was meant to make you laugh
Turns into tears
That seem to take
Life’s  breath away
Leaving you to feel
Like there’s so much left to say
If only this, if only that
If I only could, if you only would
So many tricks of the mind
As we try to find
Justification for holding on
To what should be freed
So we can move on
Yet we hold out hope
In each accidental hello
That tides will turn
Though they have long washed away
It’s just the way of life
And how love burns
Until we learn
The difference in what we feel
And that which is real


Details | Free verse | |

My Baby

A gift like no other gift, 
one that can't be bought
a precious human being, 
deserving the right to live
to exist as we all do, 
but sometimes it just doesn't
happen that way,

A baby of no harm, 
a baby of no sins
a baby of pure love, 
and only innocence

Tender moments, 
carrying wishes
disappointments, 
everyday misses

Sitting there all alone, 
even though 
I was surrounded,
by others

While wondering, 
why it may be
that I am made to suffer,

Wanting nothing more,
but to die
inside and out,

Things happen for a reason,
so I was taught
I'll never know the reason,
but I'll always feel the loss

The loss of my child,
my baby was taken
away from me,
and there is no reason

I constantly ask myself,
why did this happen?
what did I do wrong?

I asked God to save my baby,
to protect us both
I remain here,
but my baby is gone

It seems as if, my whole world,
just fell apart
and all I could do,
was sit back and watch it happen

I found myself, 
feeling lonely
needing someone, 
anyone to hold me

All I could do was cry,
I had to cry, for the sake of myself
for the sake of my baby,
for the sake of my heart
I had to weep

I cried and cried aloud,
hoping to be heard
please father, 
I'll do whatever you want
you have my word,
just please save my baby

I bled so much, 
had so much pain
denied to myself, 
everything would be okay

Crying and pleading,
praying and weeping
became an everyday routine,
it was so hard to believe
this was happening to me,

It's not over yet,
it never will be
everyday and every night,
it's in my memory...










(March 1998)
My sweet baby
you will always be with me...


Details | Rhyme | |

I Was Thinking Of The Words To Say


I was thinking about something
just the other day.
I was at a loss for the
"right words to say."

I was thinking about a time
"way back when."
That day I became born again.
A zeal for Jesus that
I once had.
Excitement in my life,
a heart so glad.

A passion for Christ
overwhelmed my soul.
I loved Jesus-for he had
made me whole.

I've forgotten things that
I once knew.
Reading God's word-
I no longer do.

What has happened to me?
I'm so ashamed!
I'm an embarrassment to
Jesus' holy name. 

So, dear Jesus, my knees
I humbly bow.
Please change my life...
I need you now!

By your word, transform
me deep within.
I confess to you my backsliding sin.

I re-commit my life NOW-Yes I do!
And by your love, I'm made
BRAND NEW!

By Jim Pemberton






Details | I do not know? | |

Being Different

The past, it may be over
but is it really changed? 
I wish I could forget it
but my life's still rearranged.

I'm always told I'm 'different'.
There are things I just won't do.
These things that make me strange to them
I owe them all to you.

Because of how you were then
I swore I'd never be.
Somehow I lost myself in this
although I'm finally free.

I won't even look at alcohol.
Oh gosh, no way...no how! 
My kids will never see me drunk.
Not later and not now! 

You'll never hear a curse word
be uttered from my lips.
Although I may be thinking them
while my hands are on my hips! 

I seem like such a nut case
to all who don't know why.
I don't waste time explaining...
I couldn't even try. 


Details | Rhyme | |

You Don't Have To LIve Like You Did Before

You don’t have to live… 
 Like you did before!
I can give you my love… 
 And so much more!

You don’t have to keep on
 “bringing up the past…”
I will give you a peace and joy
 that will forever last!”

The chains you once had…
 No longer have to hold you down.
I will pick you up and plant you
 on solid ground!

You don’t have to live the way
 that you once lived…
An abundance of forgiveness and mercy
 is what I freely give!

You no longer have to live a life
 that is filled with fear…
I will always be your best friend. 
 I am always here!

You can come to me for a love 
that is worth finding…
My promises are forever.  
You need no reminding!

You can be a new creation. 
 Old things passed away.
I am that I am.  And I can change
 your life TODAY!

I am Jesus.  Your provider. 
 The all-sufficient one.
My arms are wide open for you… 
 Won’t you come???

By Jim Pemberton   
12/07/10


Details | Couplet | |

This Time of Year

The air is fresh, mornings crisp and clear
God I do love this time of year
Vibrant colors abound on the trees
Gracefully falling with the breeze
The workday runs from sun to sun
Until the "Bringing in of the crops" is done
I am a lucky man to live this life
Respect of my community and loving wife
Sometimes in life the land yields plenty
The blessings throughout the day are many
As I watch the sunrise to the east
It gives my soul a spiritual feast
For all my friends everywhere
To my Lord a silent prayer
To the north her majesty appears
For all to see beautiful and clear
Forever snowcapped and standing tall
Lady Shasta watches over all
To the south another blessing to see
The Sutter Buttes clouded in mystery
It was the Lord that gave them their birth
The shortest mountain range on earth
The coastal mountains to the west
Offers the sun a place to rest
Followed shortly for all to see
The "Harvest Moon" clear as can be
Then comes a moment that is hard
As I head my "Cat" off to the yard
My final ride of this year
My face accepts a single tear
My heart becomes full of sorrow
I inject myself with poison tomorrow
Thats the price that a junkie must pay
Years after he has changed his way
The reason is very clear to see
I put myself "At risk" to hepatitis C
I can't stop the fear from flooding in
What will it be like to hold a rig again
Through all the loss and all the gain
I reckon that moment will bring me pain
But through the pain I'm able to see
God has his angels covering me


Details | Free verse | |

Why i'm a poetess

I'm just a kid, and life is a nightmare
I'm forced to be mature beyond my age
Using my writing as my therapy
Scrawling my thoughts across the page

Every couple days or so
a poem or two I write
I can't sleep while my thoughts process
So i scribble throughout the night

I give you all my thoughts and fears
this is the reason that i write
so that i can clear my head
giving me the strength i need to fight

In this book i write the things
that i cannot say to their face
but letting it all out on paper
helps me to keep my place

writing poems calms me down
and puts me back in control
I have been writing poems for a while no
since i was twelve years old

Writing puts things in perspective
shows me another point of view
it helps me work out what was done wrong
and shows me what i need to do

If you look closley at what I write
I think that you will find
That exposed on these many pages
is the darker side of my mind

Everything i feel, i write
my thoughts are a tangled mess
I write to clear my head and keep myself sane
thats why i'm a poetess


Details | Rhyme | |

When God Called Me

When God Called Me…

When God called me…  
I didn’t know what to expect!
The words he spoke to my heart.  I won’t forget!

What God said to me….  I remember so vividly.
He woke me up in the night so unexpectedly!

When God awoke me.  I “jumped out of bed.”
I wanted to hear what his spirit said.

What God wanted for me…  Was to follow him!
I wanted to obey and trust him as my friend!

What God desired was to have a faithful heart!
He was there for me…  
Right from the start!

My wordly possessions…  I left behind!
A new treasure in Christ…  I did find!

Many of my “past habits” begin to leave me…
As I felt God’s awesome love all around me!

My thoughts and attentions were decided.
Everything I needed...  
 God provided!

I’ve chosen to follow him 100 percent!
Fellowship with my creator,
is time well spent!

He is my beloved and I am his!
He is with me each day I live!

Won’t you beckon his spirit’s call?
Living for Jesus makes it worth it all!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

A Painted Smile

We can paint a picture bright, 
to keep all sadness out of sight.
To hide from those held dear,
to full of joy appear.

An insecurity so deep,
afraid of others seeing us as weak.

Our emotions we attempt to hide, 
but they are strong inside.
Instead our feelings we suppress,
causing endless stress.

Feelings have thoughts that manifest without doubt,
but it's not always convenient to let them out.

Use any means possible that brings you comfort and ease,
write in a diary, or go swinging from trees.

To talk of them freely takes courage and understanding,
have faith that the whole world is not into branding.


Details | Blank verse | |

the rotting edge of hope & abandon pt. I

when the world falls,
will you be my figurehead queen?
dark regent, of my secret heart & broken-glass dreams
drip waterfall lies from full pink lips
& bleed out your truth(s) to me?
come silently in the night
over plush & supple fields of carpet
into the halls of my half-waking 
& reach for me through the illusions 
& shadows of my own doubt,
so strong, it wraps me up, 
myself all contained & tainted, 
tainting only myself.
be the beautiful & shining falsehood
that brings me back into a world of
the likewise
leaving the torn pieces of the true falsity, the true reality
hanging shreded in the doorway
rotting on the edge of
what was & what could be
be my perfected failure,
my self-less
& self-serving love
my heart is yours;
it never beats the same way twice


Details | I do not know? | |

You Never Say Sorry

You had hurt me thousands times
And I wait for those words to come
Wait till the sky turned dark
Wait till things became undone

You had never say sorry to me
Not even once in your life
You left me behind in the dark
While I gave you all my life

And now, I am torn into pieces again
You never save me from this pain
Sorry is the only word I want to hear
And one day, you will finally understand


Details | Ballad | |

life in america

 HAD HER REALLY FEELING LIKE THAT SHE COULDN'T GO TO SCHOOL   
in            her heart i n her body she froze  mevmerize by the  time that she had to 
into her body man that dude


Details | Bio | |

Confusion

Feeling confusions
all lost in my head
I don't know what to do
so I turn to you instead

Your advice is hard to hear
cause your so far away
I try to take it gently
so I kneel to you to pray

Things have gone so differently
the life I tried to build
everything is all the same
this life is unfulfilled

So to you again
I turned and cried
cause in this life 
I know I tried


Details | Personification | |

Can you hear me god

Sometimes I question my own faith and wonder if you are real,
can you really feel all the pain I feel.
I wonder, Can you hear me god?

Sometimes I cry myself to sleep,
do you know the reasons why I weep.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I give up on myself,
is it because you forgot about me and chose to let me deal with myself.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes people hurt me , and sometimes I hurt others,
but it seems you let them be and it's my life you choose to bother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes i feel like I'm your mistake,
is it because you judge me for all the mistakes that I make.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I hate others and sometimes others hate me,
but it seems you don't see others,
and it's my life with troubles you smother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I hate you for taking my mother,
Sometimes I hate you even more for portraying my father.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I think of my past,
and that's when I reliaze that nomatter what I'm feeling now,
it will never compare to the pain I was feeling back then.
It's times like this that I realize that's when you truelly chose to be my father,
to scold me, but hold me, to teach me but reach me.
To show me that my pain won't always last.

I believe this is true, at least that's the picture you drew,
yet I still wondwer, Can you hear me God?


Details | I do not know? | |

New World

In an entire new world
It seems there's no one to hold on
Just a lonely girl
Whose joys are shattered and gone

In an entire new world
Where it seems so cold
No worth of a million pearls
But of pride so bold

So now I realized
I'm on your own
Life's a rolling dice
No place a real home

When I trust I'm betrayed
When I love I'm heartbreak
I'm lost in every single way
Consoling the heart always dismayed

To and fro along with the swift currents
Struggling hard to grasp a firm hold
Hanging helplessly in a grip of the tyrant
As its weaknesses I tried to unfold

Someday, I'll claim my rightful place
Where no one can put a halt
In this world i shall ace
Who dares deny my part?


Details | I do not know? | |

Angry me

 I look in your eyes, the colors are changing your not the same person I met in the 
beginning of the season. Why all this jealousy I am only trying to love you and now you 
look at me like an enemy would a foe. Excuse me for thinking this but now your getting an 
attitude. I see the roll of the eyes and the whispers behind my back. It doesn't hurt me 
you know because I could really care less it just angers me that you are still 
pretending. Don't smile if your really mad. Because I am seriously getting annoyed with 
all this deceit. It's obvious that you don't want me around, constantly giving me the 
cold shoulder. Don't you know i'm better off I have people all over the world I don't 
need you. So if this is an attempt to drop me like a egg out of a window please warn me 
before I crack because then it will get brutal. I am mostly a nice quiet girl but that's 
only when i'm relaxed. You don't want to see the demons within me, take advantage for as 
long as you can but you know that as long as your picking i'm steaming. I am boiling 
slowly like water on the stove. Touch me after a while and boy I will get cold. Don't you 
think it's funny, don't you think it's sad. I'm shuffling my feet lonely but true fully I 
am not alone. I just wondering why i'm here... It used to be so much fun. You loved me 
then you loved me way back when. I guess everyone backs out when they find out the real 
me. Anger me go ahead, trouble me, but I've dealt with this before. It's nothing new, 
It's the same old same old and no matter what you do this time I won't fold. So i'm 
angry, just look beneath my brown eyes. Behind that softness lies a hard shell that's 
taken many blows.


Details | ABC | |

Daddy the Alcoholic

Daddy the alcoholic,
 every single day,
full and countless glasses,
 guzzled down,
help him please, and bring my daddy back to me.


Details | Free verse | |

tainted

tainted
the way you see me
the way I believe 
me
to be

never sure
in this swirling
confusion
you call
love
and I call
pity

the way you
care
for me..
take 
care 
of me

giving 
you..
up for
me and
i will 
always
be 
tainted

and you
love..
to see me 
cry
real tears
not the
fake 
ones on our
wedding
day
tears
but the ones
tinted
blue
out of 
saddened 
despair

for you it’s
all the
proof
you 
need…

that I am
still
tainted


Details | Verse | |

A Restless Girl In A Pink Bedroom

A restless girl in a pink bedroom 
  Scans the implacable ceiling, 
Or buries her face in a book 
  To subdue the hurting feeling. 
And the days fall flat as roadkill, 
  Grind on and cool their heels 
In minutes and hours of deadlock, 
  Like rusted cogs and wheels. 
Childhood sneaks to closure, 
  And nothing does no good 
On the border between confusion 
  And the bloom to womanhood. 
In the tangle of ebony hair 
  Lank and listless on the sheet, 
And the summer-kiss tan of her skin 
  Lie the sorrowful signs of defeat. 
She could cry for the ending of times 
  Rose-tinted with visions of love, 
Now a restless girl in a pink bedroom 
  Sighs and stares at the ceiling above.


Details | Free verse | |

guaranteed money back...

Stuck.  Glued.  Skewed.
devoted to devotion
dedicated to dancing
on a string

threw away the safety net
to take the chance on
just
once
more

give me a reason
to be here


Details | Free verse | |

WITHIN THE LOOKING GLASS: Conclusion


Now this cross is carried...And a crucifixion--AWAITS--and the blood 
which has fallen--to late--for an answer, to late to be saved!!! A thousand
eyes--wondering/staring deep inside, looking for forgiveness inside of dead eyes
gone astray...A hint of darkness, begging eyes that fade...deep within the
voices--CRYING/CALLING my name...it's better off inside here--so peaceful and safe...
No feelings, no sadness, no sorrow, no pain...I'm now free from the madness--
drifting-- freely/happily away...Away...Away...This will not last forever...
SADLY--I begin to feel--I breathe in the poison, of a new life I start--AGAIN--
in a new life I begin again...And there is no END...TORMENT... TO grow again---
to feel again-- to hurt again--to lose my mind, over and over and over again...
There is no never, there is never an END...PERPETUAL, CONTINUOUS SICK LIFE!!!
There is no absolute meaning...Just a struggle to get by...Forever, and ever and ever
TORMENT!!!

Within the looking glass--why can't I get in??? Be the one on the inside, instead 
of the one lost within??? I can't stand to look at you, to see the distorted reflection...
Is it me, or is it an ILLUSION??? I don't even recognize you...It can't be me!!!
Maybe one day--once again I can step inside, and not come back...Maybe I could just
fade away--DISAPPEAR--never exist...And maybe in all actuality--I DON"T!!!
Maybe, I'm just a figment in someone elses mind...Maybe, I haunt them with a MADNESS...
Or maybe, I am INSANE!!! Or just a little confused...There is a QUESTION to my SANITY,
but an unheard answer... 

Be one looking out--instead of the one looking in!!!

05-14-2002 


Details | Ballad | |

Martyr for the Unorthodox word

If I had over 10,000 dreams You'd be the only thing my mind could see Judgment couldn't be real Succumbing to the fear of this cold life Find a way to break through The self-destruction of wordly delusions Don't tell me I've lived so long in a lovely illusion Break me down until we find a Nirvanic state Then bring me a savior from transgressions An atoning sacrifice Send down to me a messenger for me to submit to Bring me the truth to break through The delusion Bring me the messenger to explain it all And let me leave behind Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word


Details | Couplet | |

The Black Sheep

Pushed aside, location of home obscured, limited by isolation:
drifting aimlessly - subscribing to a voluntary incarceration.

Outcast by an alternative perspective, a differing sense of direction,
through a desire to develop resolutions to numerable imperfections.

Others recede into bad habits - shirking from every challenge,
placing emphasis on ignoring responsibilities; yet expecting a life that’s lavish.

So it’s hardly surprising when their dreams fall by the wayside,
having taken the easy road too often, they’re fighting against a landslide
to recuperate what was lost, or rather thrown away by being lax and care-free,
they’ve imposed upon themselves a limit, as to what they can achieve.

Armed with the powerful weapon of fore-sight, I clawed myself out of the rut,
but it’s little consolation for having to watch my friends get stuck.
Trying to avoid a patronising tone, I conceal myself into anonymity -
uninspired by foolish games, approaching every overture with timidity.

Wanting to tell them to change, to realise their mistakes,
but sometimes things are hardest to see when they stare you in the face.
It’s their life to live, and do so how they wish -
I just pray they realise: there’s more to it then “getting pissed”.


Details | Haiku | |

Life

Hiccups of laughter
Bubbles up inside to be
Layered on by tears.


Details | I do not know? | |

Just Call Me Abuse

My name is abuse that is all I need to say
But just for your sake I will go on anyway.
I take pride in putting people in financial bind.
My favorite thing to do is to work on your mind.
I will destroy all you can be and make you believe that you deserve me.
After awhile you have no self-esteem left all you can comprehend
Are only the thoughts of suicide and death?
There is another part of me the physical side.
This something I have to be very cleaver on for this is very hard to hide.
I will take you from drinking soda out of mugs.
To entertainment by sniffing and using all hard-core drugs
I will take a beautiful woman and turn her into a punching bag.
When I am finished she will look like an old washed up hag.
Yes I can do all of this and yes I do mean to brag
I will turn faces all black and blue.
Oh look out I am going to get you too.
Oh no I’m not finished yet.
I can destroy your emotions too do you want to make a bet
I will take a confident man and turn him into a child playing in the sand.
The most pleasure I get is to destroy relationships, they no longer were a 
wedding band.
When I am finished with you nothing will ever be the same.
You will always be keeping your guard up always being in shame.
I will take all your family love
Then turn it into hate to shove.
I love to destroy remember my name is abuse.
What form of pleasure do you want me to use?


Details | Monorhyme | |

Midnight Visit

Thump and flutter, scared me at first you see.
Again a flutter, flapping, what could it be,
Then as I peered at window above me,
What did my eyes look upon, oh golly gee?
Red bird upon the screen, was it a he or a she.
No matter of fact makes any difference to thee.
I grabbed my camera quick, before it could flee.
Zooming in with the lens, capturing it free,
Flittering, now still its tail spread outwardly.
Upon the flash, the red bird flew into a tree.
I quickly pressed buttons almost every key.
Hoping, I captured the red bird frantically.
I captured this redbird upon the screen easily.
Now I had proof of my midnight visit, truly.
This night, a beautiful red bird, visited quickly.
What purpose or sign did it have any physically?
No idea, maybe just a crazy red bird’s decree,
No matter what, it is a proven, real live story.


Details | Lyric | |

The Escapist's Plea,

I dont know where i'm going anymore hard to tell who you are when the indiffrency has settled in cold, empty, barren will i ever find a way? Help me find a way out of this sorrow filled cage My soul singed with everyday Reality so hard to face I need to find a way to escape Only if i could just fly a way I try to stay sane But i fell under the september rain A repuiem for the reality That i never wish to see Help me find a way out of this sorrow filled cage My soul singed with everyday Reality so hard to face I need to find a way to escape Only if i could just fly a way I need a way to escape, Only if I could just fly away


Details | Rhyme | |

Does Anyone Still Preach On Sin

Does Anyone Still Preach On Sin?

Where are the preachers who
 actually preach on sin?
Where is the fire of God that 
totally consumes within?

One thing that is much 
needed this very hour.
Is God's presence and his 
majesty and power!

Many preachers seem 
worried "they may offend."
Too many are afraid they'll "lose a friend."

If they really preach God's 
word as they ought to do.
Hardly anyone would be sitting in the pew.

No wonder there's so much sin 
and perversion to be found.
The truth of God's word 
has been turned "upside down."

It's time we raise a holy
 standard in our lives.
Listening to God's word and 
no more of man's lies.

The judgement of God begins
 at his house--this is so clear.
Watch out--his righteous judgement
 is so very near!

What will you be doing, when he 
knocks at your heart's door?
Do you really know 
whom you are living for?

It's heaven or hell--there is 
no middle road in between.
It's time to confess and repent 
of all that's unclean.

It's only in Jesus...not religion... 
that will save your soul.
 Jesus waits for you and
 desires to make you whole!

By Jim Pemberton
2008


Details | Free verse | |

PLUNGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DEEP, YOU FOOLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello loneliness it's me, I called but no answer, makes me think your avoiding me
I saw your friend regret the other day and she said you were doing awful, She said you 
had gotten down and out because many people, have forgotten how good you can make them feel
They have forgotten, just how bitter-sweet your presence delegates them
Hey! Loneliness? what time is it in denial? I just thought I would tell you, I haven't
forgotten
I will always remember cold and hot days when a wall to a closet I was hiding, was a gift
from you
Oh! and don't think I forgot how you stayed with me and talked me through the slices on my arm
I couldn't have carried that out without you, You made me see that nobody will be around
like you,
I cut so deep that for a second I was wishing to see the color blood bones makes, sounds
sick?...
Just like me, I'm unhealthy in fits of rage but oh! I know that's just you morphing into
insanity
Do you remember also, when I called out names of those who said they cared?
Me neither never met them before but if you see them, tell em' I cry by blood and mark by
knife
I shoot like bullets, I hurt like broken, But don't you see? This is the price I pay for
loving you...
Loneliness!


Details | Free verse | |

Yours

I understand
the need for redemption
when all they do is ask about me
and the phone company has never
even heard your voice.

The scar on your leg
hasn't yet faded from our accident
four years ago (you study those
scars every day, as if searching
for blame)

and you find it

buried beneath cobwebs of
false hope and deflected
stories of the life you had
and the life you have…
I can do no right
here, within the 
wish-I-was.

If I were stronger maybe
or you less so,
I’d bandage your wounds 
and rock you to sleep
but you are motion-sick
and healing just fine
without me.

How long before the
questions subside?
Will you answer in the
voice of pride, or reason?
Six years’ fallacy, or
merely unfortunate?

My legs are torn too,
but I don't wear shorts in the summertime
(I never tan anyway)
and I never said I was beautiful.


Details | Free verse | |

"I Am Who I Am"

What in the world am I doing here?
This world, now I know, is not real...
Where is the wheel? How do I steer?
Because I know exactly how I feel...

Why should I choose?
And who really cares?

I'm tired of all thier questioning stares.

I Am Who I Am.
I don't want to be someone else.
I won't change my mind-
The cards have been dealt...

Who created this F---ed-up program?
Does he sit behind his camera & laugh?
Who drew the G--d--ed diagram?
And how much does he pay his staff?




KC'06


Details | Free verse | |

Autism

O, I love my dear boy
So dearly and so blindly
I will give him my blood
And life if God permits so

He's so weak and sick
So pallid and so tender
But I know he's an umbrella of snow
In the wide-brimmed form

A rhyme, a loft 
Almost in the spelling of my own world.



Details | Free verse | |

I Hate...

The collision of my feelings,
And the confrontation of words,
The lies,
All the lies…
Hatred, hate, all the hate,
I hate…

Drown in my pain,
Until you suffocate,
And free yourself from me,
To free me,
I hate…

A million words burn in me,
A thousand screams call for freedom,
For salvation,
But my soul is abandoned
In the void,
I hate…

Let me fade away,
Let me turn into black,
Let me dissolve into nothing,
To free me from myself,
I hate…

Fear,
Free my fearful heart,
And take me away,
Anyone…
Let these words stop:
“I hate.”

Break the chain of eternity,
Kill the immortality of my torment,
Let my blood flow in my veins,
And let the air circulate
In and out of my body,
I hate…

I hate…
You…and you,
I hate life,
I hate me,
I hate…
Everything,
Hate, hate, hate,

“Hate , hate , hate”
I woke up saying,
With the letters,
“H” “A” “T” “E”
Sliding between my lips,

I cried loudly,
For I felt it,
I felt the hate,
Conceal all my feelings;
I felt it make me grab a knife…
I stabbed myself!
I stabbed my heart…it made me stab myself…
Just to free itself from me,
And to free me,
Forever…  


 



Details | Quatrain | |

Dad

I'm sure you think I'm crying.
You think it hurts so bad.
The only thing that truly hurt,
was when I lost my dad.

He really wanted me to know
the way life was meant to be.
He always tried to help me out.
He truly cared for me.

I pray one day I'll see him
laughing once again.
He was so much more than people knew.
He was part of a bigger plan.

Now he's gone to heaven
and I hope he's looking down.
I need him still to guide me
when I laugh and when I frown.


Details | Pastoral | |

My Heart And My Soul

My heart feels lonely and I am blue
I dont know what I can do, for I wonder
if I'll see the Son of God looking at me 
and if he dose will he be pleased or say 
this day go from me, Oh how I do want to
see heaven, I've been saved sence I was seven
my heart cries out from the deaths of my
soul save me God from this day on Dose he 
hear me Yes or No this lonely feeling is 
haunting my soul Please dear God make it
stop and help me see heaven in Loves pure
light.


Details | I do not know? | |

This isnt Love

These emotions i can no longer hide
Getting so tired of being put aside
Getting put second to everything in you life
From the money your baby mother even your ride
You know this isnt love 
And you know this isnt right
Yet you expect me to smile and act like everything alright
I cant do this anymore
I cant even sleep at night
My eyes are all cried out 
My heart has shaddered from the pain
My mind is tired of wondering 
And my voice is gone from speaking out on this thing we call a realationship
I wanna love you
But i can no longer try
I'm tired of wonderin why 
why do i love someone who is and my never be mine
Some one who love money more than life itself
Someone who'd give me up in a heart beat in order to gain a little wealth
This isnt love and this isnt right
this is the last time i'll have a sleepless night



Details | I do not know? | |

Eyes of Fire and Heart of Stone

I see pain in their eyes.
I hear sorrow in their cries.
Inside I break and cry alone,
with my eyes of fire and heart of stone.

No matter how much pain I feel
I am sure that I will always deal
the way I know..alone
with my eyes of fire and heart of stone.

Others may not know the fear.
They know just what they see or hear.
I come off cruel and cold.
Inside I'm not...I'm just not bold.

I have to thank my mother
for the love she's never shown
The one thing that she did give me...
her eyes of fire and heart of stone.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

A Dark Angel

A dark angel with crimson eyes        
Floated down to visit last night
I lay sleeping as he Lurked
Sensing his indecent intrusion
I kept my eyes shut tight

He enveloped my power
Awakened me from sleep
He sought out a way indeed
To tempt me into listening 
To a spot my soul would creep

I long to know why he came...
To show me his sinful ways
Why showing such evilness…
Mattered so much to him
Scaring me with a sinful gaze

Darkness and sin entered me
Dreaming I was not yet asleep
I dreamt of a Dark Angel
Then I noticed.... as I woke....
A broken feather on my sheet~


Details | Free verse | |

Innocence of a Child

Mister,
Why did you hit Mommy?

Mister,
You can't punish me,
You're not my daddy!

Mister, 
You say not to hit,
But your actions declare you a hypocrite.

Mister,
You push Mommy down,
But you say not to tell unless I say she fell.

Mister,
I try my darnedest to be good,
But you say I'm not action like I should.

Mister,
You hurt my feelings,
But you say you're just teaching me something with meaning.

Mister,
You come home with more than just Mommy,
But you say I saw nothing

Mister,
The night you came home drunk,
You know the night you shot Mommy with a shotgun . . . 
The night you left her beaten, bruised, scarred,
Bleeding on the ground. . . 
The night she went to sleep and never woke up

That night I was left alone,
Helpless,
Nowhere to go.

Mister,
Why did you do it
When you said you loved Mommy?

Mister, 
Why did you leave me stranded 
When you said you cared about me?

Mister,
Because of you
I am left here to die
Beside this dumpster where you told me to lye.

Mister,
I've been waiting here like you said,
For days,
Weeks,
Months,
But you r face I have not seen

You have let me down, Mister,
But that is nothing new.

You always told me to be a good child,
So I will.
With what's left of me, 
I will wait,
Calling your name . . . 

Mister . . . ?
Mister . . . ?




Details | Imagism | |

dignity

across rooms gust strong winds
emptiness without formed cracks

shook narrow confines
from the darkness within

indeff,rent,rent songs
nostalalqiques dreams
attentive inhumane screams
desire to belong

to accept dignity
speak sweet
accept defeat and
smile throu tormented peace.


Details | I do not know? | |

What's inside us all....

Anger
What a sulfurous mess of molten evil
Troubles boil and surface
The singing of fine nerves within one’s self
This pushing of restricted buttons
Annoyance, Bitterness, Harm
Can one truly control it?
Stretching into the belly of the beast
Ripping, Tearing, Gouging
At its pivotal moment
A raging bull in a once peaceful town
Monstrous demons
The evils of your mind
Do you let the gates break open?
Shall you release it to the ones around you?
Anger
When controlled, it is an ordinary burning emotion
Yet, when the chains shatter and crack loose…
Oh the more difficult it will be to pick up the pieces    


Details | I do not know? | |

A bubble

In a bubble
A big
glass bubble

Inside
breath fills
outside empties

People preplayed
movies
Clouds airbrushed
stilled in motion
Pigions in
motionless flight

I am looking for 
a crack
A way in
A way out


Details | I do not know? | |

Life

Life…………………….
 
Its mysteries
Its wonders
Babies born
Everyday
Thieves
Criminals 
New friends
New enemies
Adults pushing their   
Dreams
Threw their 
Children
Too many
 gangs
Not enough people
2 b their victims
Aids, STDS, too many
Things that can kill humans
TOO many
So many controlling
People when will they learn
Selfish, greedy, kind, considerate
Isolated, content , heartrending, mad ,hopeless
Wanting better
Wishing dead
Wanting a 2nd chance
Behind bars 5-life
Cut off from life
Not 1 family member
2 go 2
Make a mistake
Run 2 your rich father
Or mother
Not having a care in the world
So dim –witted 2 drop
Out of school
At the age 10
Wats is left of your life
U have no education to persuade your dream
Stuck can’t even get a job at Burger  King
U have so much knowledge but
Wat do u do with it nothing 
Making not even minimum wage 
Not enough 2 support your family
So burned in the head 
Give your baby up for adoption
Leave your baby with a hole in their heart
Giving up not accomplishing
Not enough strength 2 keep on
U just need an extra push, faith
Learning 2 4give &4get
Swearing to your self u will never
4give or 4get
Hating that they left u with contempt
Promising u will never cry
Nor put your head down &give up
Life can mean so many things
But it is the eyes u see it threw


Details | Imagism | |

liquid senses

Another unwanted
passes through memories
down mundane streets 
suburbs undaunted

available liquid pass
tempted nostril senses
youth invaded stolen by
unpure pretenses

soft like shreds of life
tears of laughter
preserve treads
to a childhood lost to
hereafter 


Details | Fibonacci | |

Despicable Friend

One
Man
cries out
soundlessly,
tears of agony.
Reflections dance on a black pool
Life ravages slowly. Taking a small bite daily.
Desperation eventually becoming mankind's dearest despicable friend.

	


Details | I do not know? | |

help wanted apply within

why are things not the way they seem
cut wrists not seen as a silent scream
and crying is seen as crocodile tears
not the emerging of your inner most fears

the pain in your head caused by tension
and pills being popped for attention
how many doors need to slam?
before you realise they don't give a damn!!

how many times we try to please
so we can feel at total ease
and many times we stop to look
at broken hearts and the time it took

what started as a tiny tiff
nasty words come fast and swift
and how many lives will it take
to part true love with the fake

why do the good always die young
when only half their time is done
sitting at night all alone
no-one To talk to on the phone

other people sit alone with their strife
praying for someone to sort out their life
sitting alone they slash their wrist
add another suicide to the list.


Details | Free verse | |

Me, Myself, and My Soul

As happy melodies hum,
Underneath, the sounds of sadness come,
Provoking all the sorrow and fear,
That all hearts are forced to hear,

Looking at the glowing mirror,
Seeing the reflection of “Myself”
Shadow less, I stand,
Contemplating the solid glass, imagining “Me”

Hearing the terrified breaths of “Myself”
While inside, I am touching the joyful “Me”
That an eye no longer can see,
No sympathizing, no sympathy,

Through “Myself” I could feel my lonely soul,
Desolated from the incomprehensible world,
Surrounded by rhythms created by void,
That I hear “Myself” continuously sing,

My soul sees through “Me,”
Unleashing the pain, making freedom surround,
But “Myself” comes and interrupts,
My freedom and my soul begin to corrupt,

“Me,” someone that no longer lives,
Someone that tries to forgive, “Myself”
The person that took place,
The person living a life drenched with dimness,

“Me,” is gone,
“Me,” has disappeared into non existence,
My soul is surrounded by “Myself”
Cherishing “Me” by the colorful memories...


  


Details | Lyric | |

YOUR CHOICE

What is it that GOD deals to us, from The Heavens and The Stars?, 
The choices that we make in life, will bring us near or far.
He has given us these two things, they are Life and Free Will too,
as what you choose to do with them, is merely up to You.
You may choose to do the Wrong Thing, leading to The Darkest Night,
Or turn and walk the other way onto The Path of Light.
The Bible says " God Loves Us All " no matter what we do,
All that He is waiting on, is just a call from you!!!!
To tell him you've been going, down a steep and beaten path,
And would he please just show you, Somehow, A way to just get back!!
Now you're Starting Over, and as well you see "  The Light " ,
Your Hope and Faith, God gives you Wings, Now Start A Brand New Life!!


Details | Free verse | |

Nothing IsThat Simple

There is a man,
with a crooked tongue,
he rambles on,
about things,
needing to be done.
I can do this,
I can do that,
now really sir,
I smell a rat.
Nothing is so simple,
there are problems ahead,
I still remember,
what the others have said.
I cannot follow,
I have a brain,
don't pee on my future,
and call it rain.
Out of control,
everything is wrong,
the flood is coming,
and it won't be long.
The rim of the skillet,
is getting mighty hot,
don't tell me it's cool,
when I know it's not.
Carved in stone,
so long ago,
are the only words,
we need to know.


Details | Free verse | |

Out-Of-Bounds

I like you but I know we are impossible
The thoughts of you are unreasonable
You'd never look at me that way
No matter what I think or say
You are what I call rare
Is it because you show that you care?
Is it cuz you show good friend qualities
Now let me think of the possibilities
Me and you might never be
Because a friend is all you see
Wishing that things werre different
If only you knew what I meant


Details | Rhyme | |

Caught Me Off Guard

Somewhere you are sitting
Unaware of how I feel
Then again maybe you know
How I wish that you'd reveal
Every now and then
I like to close my eyes
Pretend that you're with me
The dreams I fantasize
Honestly I wish you knew
The things inside my heart
Everytime I think of you
I wish we weren't apart
Never did I think
That I would fall for you so hard
Can't control the way I feel
It all caught me off guard!


Details | Bio | |

Help Her

I started to write you this song
The day that everything went wrong
You think I have it all together
And that I’m as light as a feather
You can’t see the pain from my past
All I ever do is see you fast
You want your life to be perfect
It’s not fair you excel in every subject
It was fine when you were by yourself
My life story is somewhere on a shelf
Now you’re taking someone else down with you
We all used to be stuck together like glue
I can see your pain
I will always feel I’m the one to blame


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

You took me

When you took me, you were wrong. I was under age and God knows I was'nt strong. I 
was young and you forced me to pretend that my life with my family was nearly at an 
end. You beat me and tortured me day after dayand when you would leave , I would 
feel safe. I'd get on my knees and pray "please lord just spare me one more day".  
I don't eat, I dont sleep, you'd beat me till I was weak. I don't want to die, 
everyday  I'd cry "someone please release me from this pain I feel inside.  I've 
endured so much pain that my body is numb, I silently wait for someone to come.  I 
wish I had wings to fly up above, to sing that I'm home to finally feel loved.  the 
scars from your knife will haunt me the rest of my life.  You left me beaten and 
bloody,I waited for an angel to find me and my wish came true from out of the blue, 
God sent me an angel to show me the truth. I was empty and scared, hoping someone's 
out there who might even care.   was tired and cold.  Will this little lost girl 
soon leave this world?   Someone finally came to carry me home, by the grace of 
god, so that I can move on.   don't know if  I'll get over this, and I'll never 
understand why, how another human being could take an innocent child. You took my 
strength and destroyed my pride, just to satisfy that sickness that manifests in 
your mind.  I can't go back and change what you've done, but I have finally forgave 
you so I can move on. Even though it may take some time  and a lot of searching 
inside,I hope you find peace while your doing your time.  I'll always wonder for 
the rest of my life, why you took me that day for that life  altering ride.


Details | Ballad | |

Bruise Me

You always try
to break me down
you always try to knock me out
damage me with just your words
not physical but it still hurts
and all you do is make it worse.

You bruise me
Cut me with your tounge
Brutalize me, cut and binding
as my blood pours from the scars.
You bruise me
and it's really nothing more.

Berate me
go on hate me
it's something you love to do
yell at me, because now i see
there's nothing left for me with
you.
Your eyes so cold, words are old
nothing else that you can say
times running out, it's over now
and your the one who bruised
it away.

You bruised me
Cut me with your silver tounge
Brutalize me, cut and binding
As my blood pours from the scars
You bruised me
And really nothing more.


Details | Free verse | |

Moving

Moving is hard
it's heart wrenching
and miserable
packing is hard
ending a life
and beginning a new one
is confusing and seems to be 
without hope
leaving friends
and sometimes family
feels as if your heart is being torn in two
gone are all familiarities 
and anything 
that ever gave security
taking on the new
turning your back on old 
yet never forgetting it
building new relationships

to those who are moving,
don't blame those who moved you
the cup is half full
not half empty
new people await to greet you
in your "new world"
embrace them
and life will go on



Details | Rhyme | |

Trapped in a Nightmare

A peaceful dream on a cool cold night
Protection from fears and unwanted fright
Waking nightmares cast away
And happy dreams as clear as day
But what happens when there is no protection
And there's no shelter to hide
These unjust rules need be broken
Just for us to survive
Where has the peace gone
We are all in danger here
I can smell the blood
I know now death is near
Will I ever wake from this dream
The dream thats torn me in two
Someone help guide me back
Because I haven't got a clue
No friends to help me out
No helping hands to lend
My fears are all here
When will this pain end
Tradegy has struck my soul
Why can't I just wake up
I'm getting weaker from the pain
I fear that I am stuck
Trapped in a world 
Of nightmares and pain
I think that I've lost
This unreal game
This peaceful dream no longer clear
I love my life, I'm still here
In a dreaded dream holding on by a single thread
I won't give up. It's all in my head


Details | I do not know? | |

Anonymous

Walk you to your class
Buy you special gifts 
Give you all my love 
You're my entertainment 
We're friends nothing more 
Even though on you I have a crush 
But why do I think you feel,
I'm only anonymous?


Details | Rhyme | |

Forbidden

Untouchable, yet close enough to touch.
It's wrong, I know but I want you so much.
You are the compliment to who I am supposed to be.
You are the one who can set my tortured soul free.
To help me to thrive and to inspire me.
It brings tears to my eyes to think of the impossibility.
There are too many obstacles in our way, 
Too many people to hurt, too big a price to pay.
So with a friendship I must be satisfied,
And bury these feelings deep down inside.
It's just that from you it will be too hard to hide,
When I spend so much of the day at your side.
I think that I am going out of my mind.


Details | Romanticism | |

Where did you go?

As I sit and wonder, my mind in a spin.
When did you leave, will you be back again?
Your body is still here, I see you everyday.
But, the person I know is slowly fading away.
Somewhere in the distance, I call your name.
Stepping through the fog, yes, you still look the same..
Yet, the look in your eyes so foreign, your touch is so cold.
I'm desperately searching, oh where did you go??
When did you go??
It came without warning, just one day it was there.
Suddenly you seem like you don't even care.
Is there another, did I miss all the signs?
With eyes 20/20, could I be that blind?
How could I be that blind?
Somewhere in the distance, I call your name.
Stepping through the fog, yes, you still look the same..
Yet, your eyes seem so foreign, your touch is so cold.
I'm desperately searching, oh where did you go??
When did you go??
If you love something set it free, so I'm letting you go.
Coming back will be your choice, but, one thing you should know..
When the lifestyle gets boring and being alone starts getting old.
When your lying there remembering who you used to hold..
It's me you'll think of who's love no other can compare..
Remember you had me, but, I'm no longer there..
No, you made sure I was no longer there..
Do you wish I was there???


Details | I do not know? | |

my crazy life

I sometimes sit and wonder why my life is so crazy
And other times I try not to let it even phase me
But its hard to forget about it when things happen in my life that only god can 
change
He can only change the things in my life that have me feeling so strange
Feeling like I need her just to ease my pain
Dang! I lost my train of thought see things will never be the same
My crazy life
This messed up world.
Confusion, depression
I just need her , the girl
I need her to hide me from all the pain that wants me
The pain that feeds on my flesh and tare my insides apart
The pain that took the hope I had in my heart
One life to live but no reason to go on
Six feet under the ground is where I think I belong
Dead. 
Gone to a better place
Had  to leave this world with her in my face
The girl
Now there is no more of me, I got away
My crazy life is history


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

Falling apart

I'm fulling apart my heart is full of smoke I swear I dont joke
my heart is beating full confusion and I have no solution because
I'm falling apart inside I feel like I'm dieing inside because
of all the lieing my mind and heart are racen Im tracen my step 
because am falling apart


Details | Free verse | |

Light Within My Heart

You… my love?
That is a question that I really can’t answer
No matter how long or how hard I try
I feel as if I am going nowhere
With no guide on the path I follow…
Trapped within a web of confusion
I want to confess my feelings to you
Aloud if possible, but I simply freeze;
Ev’rytime I glance at you or the phone by my side
And it just comes out… wrong each and every time
I don’t mean to sound uncaring but I am
Afraid of the answer you might give…

But I figure that I must mature
Before I can even attempt that
You don’t need someone that will hold you back
And you know! Which is why I need time
I know that when the right time for me
Comes along, I will be ready
To confess my love to you, but until then…
I need to find the light within my heart


Details | I do not know? | |

HEART ATTACK!!

To let you know
My love is real
Listen now
While I tell you 
What I feel
You want to know
 What is true?
I’m telling you 
You have a great view
The truth is right here
In front of your face
Do you think that I 
Could be any more plain?
I try to be simple
So all understand
But at times I think
That all of man
I correct that
Women too
All have weird
Points of view
The ones that think
The way that I do
A far between
And very few
So please don’t ask me
Why anymore
For I can’t tell you
If you shut the door
Or build the wall
And ignore my call
No, that just won’t
Help at all
SO if you love me
And want to know me
And say that you, 
Will always hold me
Then you should listen
To all I say,
And know that I 
Mean all I say
For I do not lie
And if in doubt
Then there is no more I can do
To clear that cloud
Just ask you to listen
And please pay attention
And these words that I say
You can take to the bank
For they won’t bounce
Nor ever come back
For revenge with
That big scary,
Heart attack!
8/14/2005 4:02 AM


Details | I do not know? | |

The Rage Within

Your ignorant torturing and teasing sparks me.
It ignites me.
My rage is ignited, 
Ignited like a wild forest fire.
Uncontrolable!
The tears in my eyes are like the billowy, thick clouds of smoke in the sky.
Then it comes and outburst of anger that seers everyone and everything in my 
path.
It leaves a disastrous trail, a mark of destruction.
Why did you spark me?
Who's going to calm me down?
Tell me who's going to put me out?


Details | Rhyme | |

Tomorrow Has Come And Gone

Years have passed since i dreamt that night
Noises in my head, waking up to that sight
Overnight my city in desperate plight
 
Tragedies followed as the population began to fade
The strong wallowed, as the weak frayed
Mankind shown to be true, as their actions displayed
 
I found i was not alone, as others had escaped the curse
Their actions that i witnessed, man doing his worst
Abusing, taking advantage in their normal daily thirst
 
The ones who lost their eyes, never seen their end come
Even the deafened ones, never heard the sound of a gun
The muted ones just gaped, as they all tried to run
 
The fortunate ones had prayed, on the inflicted souls in strife
Targeting the weak, playing with their lives
The killings and the maiming in typical murderous rife
 
Eventually the fortunate, wanted more and more
They fought amongst themselves just like they did before
Everyday i look all around me, forever will i abhor
 
I walk our cities and towns, thinking what they used to be
The hustle and bustle of life, in the world of you and me
One day i will go to sleep, when i awake what will i see



The follow up too " It Will Happen Tomorrow "



http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/fantasy-6.php


Details | Romanticism | |

Will I ever get to see you again

There was a time when I didn't have much to care about
even with people all around me
and now it seems like I have to much to care about
but where is everyone today
my life was suddenly turned upside down
spinning out of control
then one day from out of the blue I thought of the time
I spent with you
even though our time together was short lived
it had so much to give
and the memories came pouring in my mind and out of my eyes
all of a sudden I realized
you were more to me than just another guy or friend
I can't help but wonder
will I ever get to see you again?

Most of our time was spent talking on the phone
but there were also the moments
we spent alone
I remember holding each other close whenever we were near
never wanting to let go
cause we knew we couldn't hold each other come tomorrow
we didn't get to see each other very much
and damn it now I wish to God we had stayed in touch
something here has got to give
I'm running out of things to believe in
that's why I pray everyday for an answer to my question
will I ever get to see you again?

I think of the time where we watched the game with your
friends and family
and then with no kind of planning
we were alone together
and we spent our first and only night
holding one another tight untill the morning
I remember how when we looked deep into each others eyes
for me life stopped for a moment at that time
and it was you that had my hyponotized
oh so many butterfiles
it has taken this long for me to realize
that never has anyone taken me there again
my biggest mistake I've ever made was not telling you how I truely felt
I couldn't put it in the right words
because I really wasn't sure of my emotions
thought it was just what was happening in the moment
and give time I would be alright
never did I believe now I would be in such torment
the pain of not knowing
will I ever get to see you again?

Need to find you to let you know
that you are the only one I could never let go and I really do love you so
oh somebody please help me find the answers
because I do need to know
will I ever get to see you, hold you, tell you I am in love with you again?
If so when?


Details | Rhyme | |

A Suicidal Thought

What lies behind a conscious mind,
That contemplates on suicide.
What passing fear just won’t subside,
To make them want to stop this ride?

What makes a person feel such pain?
To take a life seems so insane,
For what sole purpose be so vain?
What problem couldn’t time soon wane?

Who knows what lie’s in store for us,
If there’s a hell, then what’s the rush?
And if there’s nothing but death’s touch,
Then how could all your problems hush?

Life often has it’s ups and downs,
Wait long enough and ups come round.
You’ll find that life is quite profound,
It’s lessons leave much to expound.

So, whatever pain and sorrow brings,
It’s not worth cutting life’s short string.
Just focus on the little things -
And watch, you’ll find a song to sing. 


Details | Rhyme | |

God Beautifully Created Us


God Beautifully Created Us! God beautifully created us with unique features. Because of sin, we’ve become fallen creatures. God deigned us to have fellowship with him! But that was broken, on account of SIN! God formed us out of the dust of the ground… His wonderful creation was made all around! God had a purpose and a plan in mind. He wanted to be a part of mankind. This was broken because of Adam and Eve’s fall. But through Christ… He’s made a way after all! Through Christ we have access to God’s throne. He died for us so we can make heaven our home! His gift of mercy is for all to receive! Won’t you accept him? And believe? By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

The Choice

I've come to a fork in my life
to my right my first love 
to my left my lust, my....passion 
each road has its oppsticals 
but i'm ready to overcome
and rise above
so how do I choose
my heart is torn between the two
so few chances we get
mistakes 
are unforgivable

BY: Joshua M Lilly & Donald P Brady


Details | Cowboy | |

Faces in the Night

When the campfire’s out and you try to sleep,
But things don’t seem just right—
You toss and turn on that ol’ hard bedroll
And see faces in the night.

It just may be dreams or a sense of guilt
That now keeps you wide awake—
It may be bad stew or a wrong you did--
A friend you had to forsake.

You shut your eyes tight and let darkness come—
Pray those faces don’t appear—
But they always come and silently speak
To your conscience and your fear.

You see father’s face like it was those days
And wish you’d both had more time—
To ease all the things that then stood between 
Before he died in his prime.

And then there’s the face of your bother Tom,
Who worshipped you like a God—
Till he had fever and you laughed if off—
Then buried him in the sod.

But night always brings another dim face
Of the girl that you loved first—
Before she went and married someone else, 
And how your heart about burst..

So when the dawn comes to strike you awake,
And with tired relief you rise—
You still see those faces in sun’s red glare
And know part of you yet dies.

Too soon again bright campfires now burn low, 
As the sunset still brings fright—
For you know that sleep is not a good friend
And brings faces in the night. 
  


Details | Rhyme | |

To Whom It May Concern

To whom it may concern
I'm already prepared to learn,
To learn the life, life long teaching
There are some goals I need to be reaching
People tells me that, I'm all so young
Really, there's no need to be concern,
So curious adult life could be
But they keep saying relax and be me
From infant to toddler to teenage lifehood
All so much, I'm misunderstood,
Adulthood is so intriguing to me
But they keep saying relax just be free
It's much easier said than done
All I've been trying to do is have fun,
My life as a child was very, very complicated
I use to get so mad and frustrated
Growing up so fast at a young age
I only had time to just turn a page,
Still there are life lesson to be learn
As I continue to write, To Whom It May Concern.


Details | Rhyme | |

Walking a Tightrope (2005)

I am walking and you’re holding my hand
Ready to catch me when I land
Holding me steady so I won’t fall 
Not taking your eyes of me at all
Half way through and you let go
I almost trip as I look below
Its ok I can do this and walk across safe and sound
You jerk the rope and then I fall to the ground
On a tightrope you mislead me to believe you’re their
Its my fault I was unaware 


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

judge me not

Judge me not because only god can judge me
yea my life is wild and crazy and sometimes hard
but judge me not because only god can judge me
people tell me I'm wrong in so many things i do
but judge me not because only god can judge me
yea i like alot of things that in your eyes maybe wrong
but judge me not because only gor can judge me
in your eyes I will never be right and strong to you am never right and always 
wrong.
but judge me not cause only god can judge me


Details | I do not know? | |

Scream and Shout

I wish this battle would end today
I’m so tired and really must say
That if you continue
To stress me out
I’m afraid there’s more I can do
Than simply just shout
You say I drive you crazy
And you don’t know why
That I must scream, yell and cry
Well just once
You should hear me out
Then maybe I wouldn’t
Feel the need to shout out
But you must understand
There is a reason to you whys
Why you make ME crazy
And why I easily cry
And I’m not saying
I’m right and you’re wrong
I’m simply saying
It’s getting hard to go on
With this life I made with you
Our home, our marriage
And our children too
I love you all without doubt
But I can’t stand
How you make me shout
And I do not like the way you are
When you say that’s it 
And that it is YOU who are tired
For I have put in
One hundred and ten percent
And you may say you love me
But I can’t see that yet
I thought I did when we first met
But that one I haven’t
Figured out just yet
But I know this without a doubt
That the that you make me shout
Just isn’t right
And is driving me insane
As well as it is you
I can see your views
But the problem here
Is easy to see
It is a little bit you
And a little bit me
And together with family
Disaster makes three
That is my view
At this present time
Concluded from the vibes
That I get from you
And if you don’t get
What I’ve been trying to say
Then I hope and I pray
You figure it out one day
For I’m tired of explaining
Myself to you
When all that you do
Is form your own views
I’m sick of the way
I scream and I shout
When you twist things around
And put words in my mouth!!

8/14/2005 3:47 AM


Details | Free verse | |

End of the Wick

Reaching the end's wick
Hearts' blind innocent revenge
Burn as smiles rip...
Alas, come the end.


Details | Free verse | |

Crawl into Me

Scattering into broken pieces
Of debris,
My life has become a black painting
Of nothingness,

Within myself I see,
 You concealing me,
I feel droplets of misery
Crawling into me, to simply become…
Me… 

I wonder if my tears
Could water the eternal desiccation,
That fills my life with hopelessness…
When will “I” reappear?

Nothing but this undying pain
Remains,
The memories I thought would 
Never die…
Have killed the happiness…
And have gone away,

Like eternity,
My sorrowfulness is my days,
Is my dreams, is my prevailing thoughts, is
 Everything that creates my life…
It’s me…

Rage flows in my veins,
Like boiling blood;
I’ve become an explosion
Of resentment…
Like a volcano of red, burning hatred,

All these particles of my sorrow,
Crawl into me,
Triggering a reflection
Of the person I don’t want to be…
The Me in me…

Crawl into me…
The person I was,
The person that you were…
The person I want you and me to be…

“Farah,”
The calling of my name revived me
From talking to my shadow,
“Farah, go to sleep...You have school tomorrow!” 
My mom yelled…

Before switching off the lights,
I glanced at my shadow again
With tears in my eyes,
And quietly muttered,

“Crawl into me...”
 


 


 






Details | Ode | |

Cry of the Soul

Once, when my soul cried out in mournful pain;
I believed the Spirit, with me, wept.
When I felt that life was all in vain,
He lifted me from the drowning depth.

Now when flowing tears upon me fall,
and all seems hopeless in this life;
Does He hear my constant wailing call,
when I feel grief’s merciless cutting knife?

Where is my God when I need Him so,
when my soul is wounded and torn apart?
The One Who promised to never forsake nor leave,
does He see me here with bleeding heart?

Like the lonesome howling coyote, my soul does cry
in vain, it seems for peaceful relief.
And as the unfolding years go by,
will I forever be haunted with relentless grief?

Will there be answers which I will someday find?
Will my feet ever be back on the ground?
Unanswered questions riddle my weary mind,
as I feel and see the misery all around.

I was one of faith and considered strong,
but now am weak and a pitiful creature.
What I have become, I have pondered long;
and realize my need of the One True Teacher.

Once again, my howling, mournful wail cries out;
“Oh, God, my Master, hear my plea.
We need Your help, without one single doubt.
We beg for strength to set all pain free...”


Details | I do not know? | |

For Reals

HEAL MY SWOLEN HEART YOU HOLDER OF ITS PAINFULL BEAT,
REPEATING STRONG SENSATIONS WHICH DEVOUR ME,
NO LONGER STRONG ENOUGH ALONE,
MY SOLITUDE SHOWS MOMENTS THAT I'VE TRIED TO HIDE,
SUDDENLY THE ANGUISH FROM INSIDE BECOMES ALIVE,
AROUND HERE THERE IS EMPTYNESS WHERE ONCE THERE LIED A HUG,
IT SEEMS THAT NOW HUGS AINT ENOUGH TO REASURE ME YOU STILL CARE,
LIFES NOT UNFAIR IF UNDERSTOOD RIGHT,
YET CAN HARDLY GRASP IT,
CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT THOSE SMILES DAMN IT,
ALL IS WELL BELOW SURFACE,
AND STILL I FEEL SO WORTHLESS,
SEARCH FOR PURPOSE IN THIS MESS,
DOING THE BEST TO GET THROUGH BEING WITHOUT ANSWERS TO MY 
QUESTIONS,
WHICH IS WHEN WILL TIME HEAL ME,
NOT TO FORGET THE HURT YOUR FEELING,
TRYING TO SEAL WHATS CALLED THE PAST,
OH HOLDER OF THIS PAINFUL BEAT MY HEART IS FEELING,
DRILLING SORROWS THROUGH MY SOUL,
FILLING WITH SOMETHING NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW BUT US,
TO HAVE A YEARNING SO PROFOUND TUGGING AT US,
MUST HAVE BEEN WRECKLESSLY IN LOVE RIGHT,
BUT I'LL FEEL THIS PAIN FOR LIFE TIMES,
REFUSING TO GO AWAY,
I WOULDN'T HAVE IT OTHER WAYS,
PREFER TO STAY AS CLOSE AS POSSIBLE,
THROUGH EVERY PASS I GO,
THINKING OF US MAKES MY HEART SWOLEN,
LIKE A LOVE THATS PASSED ME BY,
AND EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP TEARDROPS SLIPP OUT OF EYES THAT 
WANT SO MUCH TO CATCH THE SIGHT OF YOU,
THE UNDERSTANDING SIDE OF YOU,
CREATING SOMETHING GREATER THAN I'VE DEALT WITH,
NONE WILL EVER MEVER MEASURE UP TO YOU,
PLACED THE SCALE HIGH WITH ONE KISS,
IT SEEMS I'VE MISSED YOU FOR A DECADE AND THREE WEEKS,
NOW IT'S SO HARD FOR ME TO EVEN SPEAK,


Details | Epigram | |

Good And Evil

Indeed, the Good desires & the Evil desires;
The two are hungry rivals that go side by side
And they are both being found in the inside;
One is on the left & the other, is on the right;
They've power to influence the heart & mind,
But, if one fed I must, I let my destiny decide.


Details | Free verse | |

Inattention

time and distance unwind
unmindful of a ticking clock
as
commitment tumbles through constant years
with ne’er a thought
that 
there exists another dimension
where all possibilities exist


Details | Free verse | |

Self Doubt

I try to keep a swagger in my step,
i try to walk boldly, 
but how can I when my own self confidence
cannot hold me?

My self-esteem ain't that low,
but then again
it ain't that high.

And sometimes I don't know
who i am, where i'm going or
why i'm so confused.

Still I strive to hold my head up;
and tell myself never to give up
or give in

Because this is a fight for my life 
and i'm in it to win.
But i'm so unsure
when I step to the plate

Should I take my own chances,
make my own choices,
or leave it up to life and wait?

I don't want to choke and make dumb mistakes.
You can't turn back time in this movie;
There is no second take.

So I leave it up to GOD
and give HIM full control.
I choose to let HIM take all the meaningless pieces 
of my life
and make me whole.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Truth

I’ve just learned the truth
Now I’ll never be the same,
I usually don’t point fingers
But this time you’re to blame.

In just a few short words
Coming from your cold heart,
You managed to break my spirit
And tear my world apart.

Lying gets you no where
You just dig yourself a hole,
If you want your life to be based on lies
Then you have accomplished your goal.

Ever heard that old saying
The truth shall set you free?
Well looks like you got what you wanted,
It just set you free from me.



Details | Bio | |

what about me?

my mind is open and my heart is pure
my share of troubles I have endured
I'm just making It form day to day
waiting for prosperity to come my way

when I see people with a whole lot of bucks
I wonder where is my share of the luck
and when I see famous and rich celebrities
all I can think to say is, "what about me?"

I use to think that I was undeserving
of whatever favors that God was serving
but now I know that that was not true
for God has given me many blessings too

when I think about all the times I got through situations unscathed
I now know that It was only by the grace of God that I was saved
and when I think about all the times I was down to my last cent
God sent some money my way, an unexpected present
and when I look back and realized many of my friends are now dead
I comprehend that my life was always spirit-led

It's not about money, the status nor the fame
It's about living life according to the rules of God's game
now I no longer go about asking, "what about me?"
I now know that I have been blessed with God's prosperity


Details | I do not know? | |

Man in the Mirror

The man in the mirror, He's not me.
That man in the mirror, He's who I should be.
He does not feel my pain, but then, how could he?
He cannot wear my shame, and then, why should he?

The man in the mirror, He's not me.
That man in the mirror, He's who I should be.
He stands with confidence so everyone can see.
He looks so sure, so strong; not weak like me.

The man in the mirror, He's not me.
That man in the mirror, He's who I should be.
When the man in the mirror is looking at me,
I wonder... Who does he see?


Details | I do not know? | |

To Be Noticed

I'm standing in a crowded room, but yet I'm all alone.
I'm screaming at the top of my lungs, but no one hears me.
I'm jumping up and down, panicking, but no one even bothers to look up,
To notice me!
PLEASE notice me, give me some attention
It seems as though our body and mind waves are in different divisions.
Separated by negativity
Our childish minds and stupidity.
Trust and Truth. Some people find it hard to show this.
But all they really want to do is be noticed.


Details | I do not know? | |

O Child of Sweet Sweet Sorrow

O child of sweet sweet sorrow, why is it that your lonely inspirations are often wiped away and your dreams are put to death with each tear? O child of sweet sweet sorrow, your anguish shows, it is not with out dreams for the world you seem to know. Even so, you mourn for that which you do not have. You wipe away your crimson tears, dress and redress your wounds. Asahmed of who you are, a coward for who you're not, lie low and gain your strength at night, run away at dawn. Your silver thoughts are all you have, O child of gentle night, hide your lonely face and dream before the dawn is soon in sight. You answer for their each mistake, a victim of your own. Come alive here in beautiful night, but at dawn soon take flight. You have your hopes, you have your dreams, but you lock them so tightly away. When that they seep out, you just let them go, left to fall away with your tears. Why are you so afraid to fight to keep your dreams? Why o child of sweet sweet sorrow, are your inspirations wiped away with that fake plastic smile, and your aspirations seem to fall away in the form of your tears?


Details | I do not know? | |

The Darkness

The beauty of nothing
Is what I see
If people opened their eyes
They would not see me.
There maybe less space
When I am around
But I am not seen
I cannot be found.
I am not worth 
My weight in gold
I am not worthy
For someone to hold.
I do not wish
For another day
I do not dream
I no longer pray.
I do not understand
Why I'm still here
I do not understand
Pain and tears.
Explain to me why
The good are to die
The bad left behind
To continue their lies.
Where is this light
I hear about
I'm lost in the darkness
With no way out.
I think of death
And what it might be
To end this nothingness
Which is me.
The answers continue
To be hidden from me
For today, tomorrow
Perhaps, eternity.
You cannot give love
Then laugh at me
For I am lost to the darkness
And no one sees.


Details | I do not know? | |

I am confused

you ripped my heart out and threw it on the floor
I don't know how to feel anymore
You twisted me into your lies and deception
I know I'm stronger then this,But i cant seem to get away
your touch is so unforgettable but regrettable 
your kisses are breath taking but destructive 
I love the things you say to me, even though its all a lie
some things feel so real, i don't know if i should believe you or leave you
And for some reason I'm stuck
you hurt me so much, but i keep coming back to you
And i don't know why i cant ever seem to get you off my mind
Your like a drug that i cant get off of
Everyone tells me to get away from you, but i can't 
You got me bound to your heart and your heart only,
I don't get why it cant be that way with you
You tell me you love me, 
but i wonder do you tell the others the same
My hearts tied in a knot,
restricting me from feeling anything but numb
I don't know what i want, the confusions growing deeper
Digging its nails into my skin
I sit and watch my tears fall to the floor,
As i wonder if you hurt the same
I need you, but i want to get rid or you
I want you, but i don"t
I love you, but i hate you
I am confused


Details | Rhyme | |

Time Impatient

Swollen pride
Hides broken heart
Time impatient
Rips us apart
Fading quickly
A damn good thing
Mourn our choices
And all they bring
Listen carefully
Speak no more
All is silent
When you close the door
Anger moves us
Sadness shames
Love surrounds us
And we're all to blame
Moving closer
To what feels right
Fighting darkness
Cursing light
We reject the familiar
And embrace the unknown
Never finding the courage
To be all alone
Long lost memories
Fading away
Photographic innocence
Shows happier days
Breathless whisper
A careless embrace
An image immortalized
Without showing its face


Details | Free verse | |

Faced With My Fears

Sitting here faced with my fears
not know how to escape it.

Never knowing who I really am
faced with the fact of life.

It stairs me in my eyes.

This thing people calls fear
tears me down inside.

With out a soul knowing it
faced with the desicions of life.

Sitting here faced with my fears.

I begin to weep

I begin to cry out.

I begin to feel pain like no other
has ever felt before.

As I sit here faced with my fears.

I reach my hand out to you 
for help and only to come and realize.

The only thing in front
of me is my own reflection.

I now have the fear of
helping myself to realize its time to let go.


Details | Rhyme | |

Lost Little Girl

There's a lost little girl
Roaming this world
Searching for truth and for love
Aimlessly seeking
Never reaping
All she is deserving of

There's a lost little girl
Giving life a whirl
While living her life all alone
Hidden inside
Is where she resides
Ever since she's been on her own

The little girl's life
Has been about strife
But now she tries to mend
Still lost and confused
She's easily bruised
For love she still contends

Her acceptance is grief
Her guilt has no relief
When her past comes chasing her down
Still she holds on to her rope
With a glimmer of hope
That her life will soon turn around



Details | I do not know? | |

Labors Of Love

I've tried to be patient
I've tried to understand
I've stood by your side
Because you're my man

I've put up with your lies
I've put up with your ways
I've heard many stories
And yet I stay

I've given my love
I've given my trust
I've given my all
For what, your lust?

I've opened my arms
I've opened my life
I've opened those doors
To include any strife

I put up with much
I get very little
I give all I can
This is my acquittal

So if you're not happy
And you have to question my love
You better take note
These are the labors of love! 


Details | Free verse | |

A View on Love

How do you know that you’re in love…?
How do you know when you feel love…?
How can you say that you’re in love…?
How do you know if you’ve never felt love…?

Though there may be times when you smile
Thinking about your sweetheart
But even you must know that deep down inside
It won’t last for too long
You shouldn’t be foolish
Especially if you’ve never felt love
But who is the one to say or judge
What love really is?
It’s nothing more than a fairy tale
That a few experience now
True love is a very complicated matter…

How do you know that you’re in love?
How can you say, “You’re in love”
When you know that love is
A mysterious feeling
Nothing but confusion comes
From a feeling anticipated
However, not many get
What it is that they’re
Looking for…

How do you know that you’re in love…?
How do you know when you feel love…?
How can you say that you’re in love…?
How do you know if you’ve never felt love…?

Do you know how many times that
One has been hurt because of love?
And do you know how many are still
Together because of love?
If love really is something we all seek
Then why does it hurt?

Very few ever find love
Very few receive true love
If the numbers are so small
Then why work for it?
Enough damage has been done
And it’s time to just move on
Love is too complicated
For most of us to handle
How do you know that you’re in love?
(How do you know that you’re in love?)
How can you say, “You’re in love”
(How do you know when you feel love?)
When you know that love is
A mysterious feeling
Nothing but confusion comes
(How can you say that you’re in love?)
From a feeling anticipated
(How do you know if you’ve never felt love?)
However, not many get
What it is that they’re
Looking for…


Details | I do not know? | |

As I Sit With Darkness

	As I sit here, not knowing what I fear most, myself or life.

	As I sit here not knowing if I'll ever be a normal person.

	As I sit here knowing people love me, but wanting to love them, but I 
	can't, because I can't even love myself.

	As I sit here knowing my love ones are suffering, because I'm 
suffering.

	As I sit here wishing I could be strong enough to over power what I 
	know is wrong and do right.

	As I sit here knowing that my name will be just a memory to people 
that 	know me and always think about the bad things I've done.

	As I sit here seeing darkness in everything I see.

	As I sit here not knowing if I see the world for what it really is or just
another miss guided person written off.

	As I sit here not knowing if my mind is just sick or just knows the truth.

	As I sit here I know that I sacrifice the happiness of loved ones for my 
thoughts.

	As I sit here I know I'm strong in one aspect. I will sit in darkness till 
it's my day to know the answers.

	As I sit here I'm sorry for my thoughts.


Details | I do not know? | |

Because

It's hard to stay happy
When you bring me down
With every day that passes
I carry this frown

Your words are harsh
When you accuse things of me
I've proved I'm loyal
And faithful as can be

My heart, it breaks
My feelings, they fade
I once loved a man
You no longer portray


Details | I do not know? | |

MY FATHER

MY FATHER IS A MAN GONE BAD
MY FATHER DOESN'T LIVE WITH ME
HE DON'T EVEN COME 2 SEE ME 
HE SAY HE LOVE ME 
BUT HE LOVES HIS OTHER 2 KIDS MORE
NEVER BELIVE WHEN HE SAY
"I'M COMING AT 9:00 PM"
CAUSE HE'S NOT
I GET HAPPY CAUSE I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN A WHILE 
NEXT THING U KNOWI GOT A FROWN, CRYING 2 MY MOTHER BOUT HOW HE LIES
NOW IT'S BEEN MONTHS
SINCE I SEEN OR HEARD OF HIM, NEVER KNOW WHEN WILL I SEE HIM AGAIN
IF I DO, I WON'T CALL HIM ,KISS HIM,ASK ANYTHING PROPBLY WON'T EVEN TALK 2 HIM 

                 HOPES HE READ THIS SO HE CAN KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT HIM


Details | Quatrain | |

Sharpening the Knife

So what
Don't give me that look
It was just a cut
I am no crook

I feel better
To see my arm bleed
You yell, "Get Her"
But the cut is my feed

Why do you make me stop?
It doesn't hurt that bad
You are not some sort of cop
Cutting makes me glad

I don't feel anymore
But the sharp blade
I am no longer hurting in the core
All the feelings fade

I wear a jacket
To cover the scars
And I'll have to hack it
They are my permanent memoirs

So I'll just sit
And sharpen the knife
Don't throw a fit
This is my life

It's not like you know pain
I do, more then others
I live life in vain
And I won't get help from my mother

I don't want your help
Just leave me alone
So just hush your yelp
Don't give me that tone

This is my choice
Not yours to say
The cut is my voice
So just let me waste away...


This is for anyone, who has felt alone, you aren't, things can never be as bad as they seem, just keep 
moving and never give up.



Details | Free verse | |

Poetic License

There is a force outside this walls
trying to penetrate the security.
Things kept crashing round us.
In love you were sheltered,                                                                                                
but now you color it hostility.
Your embracing the things
that take you away from us,
But you color them saviors.
We were encircled with words
Of loving-kindness as a support,
But you now color it bondage and chains.
With what vision do you
Contort the foundation,
Of our very make up?
We must see through different eyes.


Details | I do not know? | |

Unlovable

There’s a realm that lives inside of me,
And I call it secret heart valley. 
There the sun is always shining,
Though in this world I am pining.
There the flowers always bloom,
Whilst the real world swirls with gloom.
This place exists I tell you true, 
And there the sky is always blue.
Path ways of the whitest marble,
You really should visit; it’s quite a marvel.
Trees awaken fresh and new,
Dripping with the morning dew.
Waves lap gently at lake shores,
And here my heart, it aches no more.
Here I wander happy and free,
Released from the real world’s misery.
I run through the hills so very thrilling,
I bathe in the rivers fast and chilling.
I rest by a warm fireside at night,
And in the creatures of the forest gain much delight.
It’s the ultimate getaway for one,
It costs not a cent; it’s just for fun.
If your life in this world has made you down trodden and blue,
You can visit secret heart valley too.
Fore you’ll have to create one of your own,
My special place is not for loan.
You’ll find this sweet garden on no map or chart,
The key is located within your own heart.
Take some time to enjoy and create,
And your worldly cares will temporarily abate. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Why Did You Tell Me "I Love You?"

Why did you tell me "I love you?" 
A knee-jerk birthed of fear? 
A pandering to my ego? 
Words I wanted to hear? 

Why did you tell me "I love you?" 
Later "I don't think I do?" 
A whimsical slash of cruelty? 
Ambiguous through and through? 

Why did you tell me "I love you?" 
Then argue the point for hours? 
Bicker, snap and grow sullen? 
Destruction of hearts and flowers? 

Why did you tell me "I love you?" 
Then erase every tangible clue? 
Maybe you told me for fun? 
Maybe because it was true? 

Why did you tell me "I love you?" 
To mean life and death to me? 
If you please to confirm the truth 
What a wonderful life this could be.


Details | Lyric | |

. and then,

there are times 
when my heart
remains silent
when its pulse is
steady and slow
there are times
when i am
right with the world
fitting in like a piece
to an irregular puzzle
there are times 
when the sounds
of the life that surrounds me
blend in infinite splendor
with the music that plays
within.

and then,

there are times
when my heart explodes
and its rapid beating
becomes too much
for the confines of my chest 
there are times
when i seem to be
a square block 
struggling to escape
this round hole
of an existance
there are times
when the cacophonous symphony
invading my mind
overlaps with what
i hear outside
and the resulting noise
is disarmingly similar
to my inner chaos.

and then,

there are times
when i wonder
when this
nauseating see-saw
will stop its
strange rhythm
when the boundaries
that dictate
the shape of my life
will stop their 
shape-shifting
when i can be left 
in peace.

and then,

each time
this wondering arrives
it is followed by a certainty
that the answer is

never.


Details | Lyric | |

The Manikin

There's a manikin in my window, that follows me where ever I go, I can't seem to shake 
her, she's like my six o'clock shadow. But she seems to be everything I am, but more 
refined and more polished. 
No belly, Nice but, in creditable looks, wears a size zero in jeans, has the face of the 
american dream, she's what the public adores and admires, this is what society deems 
nessacary to be beautiful. 
I'm 5'10 a number of pounds over weight, more gut than butt, decent in what society sees 
as good looks.
They say I'm no J-lo, meaning my body should not be seen in public, 
No media coverage,
Not front page material,
No music video,
That I should grow my hair, get cosmetic surgery and wear all this makeup and then I may 
be deemed as pretty.
The question I have to ask myself is this really me?
Artificial flavoring, unessary calories, a false sense of self that can provide material 
wealth? 
No- this is societies ideology. A life time of fame filled with unconscience shame, trade 
in my dignity and what makes me me, for uncertain romances, adulterated chances, so the 
world can love my name. So people can compare me to you and you. And then put more of 
strain on todays struggling youth.
There' a manikin in my window that follows me where ever I go, I can't seem to shake her 
she's like my six o'clock shadow.


Details | Free verse | |

Help wanted

I stare into his eyes wondering if he will apply
hoping that this time won't be just another
one of the many I have fired
or rushed into hiring 
you see for some I barely
glance at their resume
I just let them start 
as soon as possible
can you be here Monday?
sometimes my wants 
can make me blind 
you see these guys 
are not a potiental 
employee of the month
they are the ones ready to disappoint
barely meeting any requirements
my desire to fill this position 
has me aching inside 
so I impulsively invite 
even though it doesn't feel right
maybe he will do a better job
he might just surprise me
but no I still have this ad
waiting for the one 
who can finally offer help
for this heart of mines. 
 


Details | Lyric | |

Teach Me How To Love

I was born beautiful
But…deformed by men
Lead me the way… 
To humanity


Details | Rhyme | |

Dad

Hello there dad how have you been? Oh! Really thats great please don't let me begin. 
Where were you just last year when I nearly died of stress? Or how about two months ago 
when my whole life was a mess? I wondered where you were all of the time, now I'm 
fifteen three years from grown and you show up on the dime! Well go back where you came 
from back into the portal you walked through, who's my dad? wheres he at? Oh no it 
couldn't be you, I saw a completely different face at the age of two! So your really 
here? this isn't a joke? Ha! Go somewhere and choke! I never needed you before and I 
definatly don't need you now, and I can walk my own self down the isle!


Details | Ballad | |

I'm Only Loving You Once

Because I'm only loving you once
I want to make it perfectly clear
No one can take that away from me
And it's a life of fear

I'm only loving you once
Forever in this life of pain
Death would solve this problem
For there is nothing left to gain

I'm only loving you once
Too bad you can't love me
If you could only love me once
We'd love through all eternity


Details | I do not know? | |

Sentimental Scars

Sentimental scars
Hurt so much more
Than these physical blemishes
I’d rather bleed briefly
And heal with a scratch
Than bleed forever
And never be repaired


Details | I do not know? | |

Control

          Control it's so easy to lose your grabbing for my shirt and I want you to 
remove it. But I know that inside I have to stay strong, it's not like me to want 
this it's not like me to fall. But I must admit that I am... it's getting deeper 
every day I crave it and other girls bathed in it but I want to stay nice and pure. 
At least until that time comes when it's right and i'm ready, pressure these days it 
gets so hard and so many girls fall because they are not steady. They fall for the 
lies and the fake love songs and when it comes time you let them sip your wine and 
then their gone. Your tonic it's unique it's suppose to be special if you let 
everyone take a dip they'll contaminate it and make it poison. Control it's a simple 
word but it means so much, when he's kissing you and pulling you, you crave it but 
please stop. I know how hard it is to fight temptation but that's one ride that you 
must not go on. Count in your head, tell me what you know... if you know that he 
loves you ask yourself has he cheated? Ask yourself if he promised to never hurt 
you, can you trust that bag full of lies or is he as dangerous as anthrax in the 
post office. How long have you known him? Is he bringing protection or should you? 
If your so deep in love that your blinded by his phoniness ask your friends if they 
approve. Moments in time your thinking of the line that he used to reel you and then 
if you smile when thinking of him I think your ready but just have control over 
yourself. If you are thinking no not until I want to then push him away, don't let 
him win because when he does he has full control. The promise of your heart your 
giving in return.


Details | I do not know? | |

Unbind Me

Untie the binds that bind you
Set yourself a flee
Release the mental anguish
Which you’ve chosen to share with me

Put your faith and trust anew
Make it selfless and continually
For the pain and misery will leave you
And be replaced with endless love, faithfully

Your doubts are as clear, as a bright sunny day
Your wisdom has taught you much
Yet you still feel discerned to give it all away
Take head to all the warnings and what they have to say

Which path shall you take my friend?
And will you relinquish this pretentious lust?
For the time has come for certain
To give in to this taboo called trust

© Stacy Lynn Stiles


Details | I do not know? | |

Senses

Death is only what you want it to be,
Vision is only what you want see,
Feeling is only what u want feel,
Will is only the power to let yourself heal,
Life is only what u want live.


Details | Lyric | |

Untitled

It’s no gain to waste all this pain.

A disgrace to not always hide this face.

My mind is lame, and it’s a shame,

to feel so numb and not be dumb.

I hate to say life’s not always been this way.

It’s an outrage that I ever lived outside this cage.

Apathy works best for me.

Cold-hearted to myself, the cheaply departed.

Sadness makes me the happiest. 

My loneliness makes me feel so blessed.

This bitter resentment fills me with contentment.

My biggest folly ever was delaying this melancholy.

However this ailment is reaching my fulfillment,

Leaving me empty, sad, happy and whole.

My bitterness is such bliss.

A feeling that I would surely miss.

I often lament evading this torment.

This suffering is the greatest thing ever.

I frequently regret never being upset.

Now I daily look forward to the sorrow that’s promised by tomorrow,

and I pray it comes each and everyday.

Without its displeasure I cannot carry on,

for it is my greatest treasure.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Up's and Down's of Love

The ups of relationships are self- explanatory 
But you shouldn’t force your partner to say it in a hurry
When people fall in love they think their feelings will remain
They never mention all the confusion, all the heartache and pain
What will you do when you’re in love, but that person doesn’t love you back?
You’ll feel all alone, and you don’t know how to act
Love is a very powerful word, but you use it in vain
You say you love them, but you feel like you have nothing to gain
When you experience the ups of love you feel like you rule the world
You feel like you wouldn’t trade your partner in for all the riches, diamonds, and pearls
You can’t put a put a price tag on love, but you try to
You feel deceived when that person runs out on you
In the beginning you felt like that person swept you off you feet
But at the end you realize all their wrong doings just repeat
Falling in love isn’t a decision that you can make
So don’t deprive people of not wanting to love, because you caused their heart to break


Details | I do not know? | |

Fade

I cling to this blade of silver, sharp and cold,
Trying to forget all that I was told.

My mind is numb, still my body feels.
Look inside, see the invisible scars that will never heal.

Thin red lines, seeping red.
Although I am alive, most of ME is dead.

With each cut I make with this blade
I feel more of ME fade away.

Crying and rocking, I look at what I have done.
My skin is marred and I wish the guilt were gone.

Every time it is exactly the same. 
I seek to find refuge by causing my pain.

Finding a calm always before the storm.
It is after this calm that Shadow takes form.

My demons arise to tell me that I've failed.
I will find no rest in life, only my self created hell.

The days now blend. Not one is different from the other.
Hands of Death, my mouth they do cover.

They hold me so tightly, struggling I draw breath.
For now I am held captive, captive in the hands of Death.

Watch me fade as the clocks runs it's race.
To die would be sweet, with no more demons to face.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Vacuous Man

I drink...
Alone, all the time, always thinking,
About past times that should have been.
I should have done this, I should have done that,
I never get the chance to do anything,
Because nothing ever goes my way,
As I'm too busy anyhow,
My bravery is diminished just for now
And life's dreams will be fulfilled another day...
And confrontational pressure will soon go away.

My life is a struggle, and
Like dead weight, I plop back down,
A tiring sigh befits my frown,
Viscous is my life's blood,
Laziness is my likelihood,
I am a self-trapped man.
Self-esteem, non-existent,
Life is sucked out, numbed is my soul,
Nothing here, no spirit left,
Nothing but skin and bones.
Imminent is my digress,
Divest of intellectual progress.

I go over the events in my mind,
The portrayal of my life, and I shine,
It's so exciting, yet so elusive,
My drunkenness has gotten me stupid,
Once again.
For I relished the vivid, savor the imagined
Wallowing in what could have happened
And afraid to take the real first step.
I'm swirling, swirling, swirling,
Filled with sameness and frustration,
Face red and swollen 
With the day's libation,
Eyes are glazed, mind on vacation,
My true reality, always distant,
The ice cracks and pops to the marriage of spirits and
I drink...


Details | I do not know? | |

Your Choice

I don’t know where I’m supposed to go, or who you want me to be
Would it be better if I were twenty pounds lighter, or a little bit more carefree?
What if I stop caring, or making phone calls to you at night?
Would you ask me what was going on, would you put up a fight?

I’m confused because it seems like you just don’t care
What am I supposed to do, sacrifice without allowing what is fair?
I want to be able to ignore that maybe you don’t want me as your own?
Really, be honest, have your feelings even grown?

I view you as a good man, with a heart and ambition for life
And I’m not asking for forever or even to be your wife
But I do know I deserve affection and simple courtesy
If your intentions are not the best, merely leave me be


Details | I do not know? | |

A Note

Is there a cure for suicide?
Or is suicide the cure?
Emotion is a boundless tide,
But death is beautiful and pure,
The depression that commands my life,
Is consistent every day,
I hate it but I don’t cause strife,
For it is the only way,
If all I felt in life was death,
Why not end it now and end my pain?
For depression tightens with every breath,
And I’ve got nothing left to gain,
I write this now to bid goodbye,
For no one knows my endless sorrow,
I found the cure which is to die,
I won’t have to make it through tomorrow,
Look at This gun in my palm,
Won’t you Listen to it scream?
I never thought id be co calm,
When my mind is breaking at the seam,
Look at my blood on the wall,
Can you see the thoughts of my mind?
All that I did in life was fall,
And wish god wouldn’t lead me blind,
Look at the boy on the floor,
I put a bullet through his head,
What if I hadn’t closed the door?
And I just tried to go the bed,
Another day living the lie,
Always trying to hide my sorrow,
All that I really want to do is die,
But I always try to make it to tomorrow,
But never again- oh never again,
To him I just committed a crime, 
All that crap about how not to sin,
I proved him wrong for one last time,
Because if I’m dead and I chose to be,
Then I’m going to hell with the beast,
Did god love anyone less than me?
Because that man is surely deceased,
Didn’t god relieve Jobe of his pain,
Depression has always been my life,
I don’t think I can lift this chain,
Or even refuse to use that knife,
If I killed myself- what was gods aim?
God just decided to make me suffer,
Each day for me was never the same,
They all just kept on getting tougher,
But its over now and my pain is eased,
I always felt like I was caught,
I hope that everyone else is pleased,
I bet they never would have thought,


Details | Rhyme | |

So Why did you hurt me so

Why you did , what you did I will never know.
Why you put me through so much pain, and hurt me so.
You obviously had your reasons.
But then I didnt know what they were.
Now since I found out.
The pain has been even harder to bear.
You sold me down the river, 
Knowing I couldnt even swim.
Only you and i know.
You commited the cardinal sin.
You broke me, you destroyed me.
My spirit and my soul.
How was I ever going to fight back, to reach.
The unreachable goal.?
But just like Humpty dumpty who had a great fall.
 I had to learn all over again to walk tall.
I found a handfull of people to help put me back together again.
To help wipe out the misery , the suffering, the pain.
So I could get on with my life, start living again.


Details | Narrative | |

Just for Me

In the past I remember how things were so simple
When I was little my cheeks had such cute dimples
Looking back I remember how sweet I was as a child
When I think again my heart told me I was so wild
Yet, in time my simple choices was revealed as true as anyone
The reason I was the way I am today, I did things, to get done
Finishing lots of my undone ideas was so incredibly hard
So I figure my heart and choices should never hold in no bard
I never thought I would learn heart aches and pain
With such under statement I did things for no gain
I was a child who held true to what he has learned
But as we got older those kinda perspective would get me burned
When I made up my mind that people was not kind
I led myself in a confusion that I was blind
In the past I do recall that seeing is believing
So I was the one who stood their with friends leaving
Alone, I felt I did not belong, I cherish each person who knew me
I got older too see how the world works it stung me like a bee
The feeling of tingling ran through my vain
My view of the world and people who knew me was stained
Now I know they are out for their selves with no kind feelings
Life I know is just a joke because of who I hung out with seeing
Today as I look at the world it is in such shambles and astray
And rather fallow everyone I just walk away


Details | Couplet | |

Love, Hate And My Fate

In my quest of life sublime
I face a mountain I must climb

There dwells up inside of me
A growing amount of hostility

My anger is growing day by day
Regardless of the prayers I pray

Like two grinding tectonic plates
One is love and the other is hate

As the plates slowly grind away
Price of hate my love must pay

Like a beautiful exotic dance
Hate is held in dark romance

Like a lone mountain flower
Love shall hold mystic power

The two sides of a single face
Only one can rule this place

Off to hell fallen angels go
Is this the fate of my soul?

Is the meaning of this rhyme?
Bound by the hands of time

For all to hear and all to see
Love and hate each dwell in me

Love and hate each have their goal
I wonder, which shall win my soul




Details | Acrostic | |

Who Are You

 How dare you take advantage of me like that ,
Leaving me stranded with no way to go forward or back.
   Using the friendship that we had led me to believe,
That there was trust and honor between you and me .
   How you layed me aside and left me for dead ,
You have caused these hateful thoughts inside my head.
   Never could I have done this to any man , 
I can see you have no concious so I know you can.
  There just one thing I really want to say  about this ,
It's been a long time since I have made a clinched fist .
  You have no idea how much hurt you have caused,
It won't be me you'll have to face That's up to God
   But you will regret mistaking this kindness for weakness girl,
Bad Karma will surely consume you this is my word.
   Yes you were able to catch me completely off gaurd ,
Never again because now I know who you are .
TAC


Details | Salaam | |

Yeh khaalipan


Jab Meri Bechaini Mit Jayegi
Jab Mere Dilko Sukoon Mil Jayega
Yeh Khaalipan Mit Jayega

Do Pal Ki Chandni Ke Liye
Aj Bhi Zinda Hoon Main
Meri Khaamoshi Ke Ageh Aasmaan Bhi Khatam Ho Jayega

Kehne Ke Liye Toh Roz Marta Hoon Main
Thoda Aur Marne Ke Liye
Yeh Deewana Kal Phir Ayega


Details | Rhyme | |

A living hell My Agoraphobia

My Agoraphobia.
In 1983 you came back  into my life.
Bringing me nothing, but trouble and strife.
You kept me a prisoner in my own home.
When all I longed for, Was to go out alone.
You caused me pain, you made cry,
I felt so ill, I thought I would die.
From doctor, to doctor, from pillar to post.
Where o where, is the cure I wanted the most?
Where exactly does the answer lie?
Eventually I found it, in a doctor called Di.
She gave me the will to carry on and fight.
I fought so hard, with all of  my might.
The shops in the village seemed so very far away.
If only I could go out, just for one single day.
I tried and tried, the tears, the pain,
It was a battle lose or gain,
I gave it everything, yes everything I had.
It wasn’t easy, in fact, it was very bad.
In 1990, after 7 long years,
A lot of heartache, many, many tears,
I was starting to win the battle of getting out the door,
With each day, I was doing more and more,
But there was still so many things that I couldn’t do alone.
Still so many jobs, that had to be done on the phone.
I could now walk to the shops, there and back,
 get the groceries, take them home, and unpack,
But I still couldn’t get a bus into town on my own,
only if I had someone to go with, borrowed, on loan.
It took several more years, of heartbreak and pain,
Before I could finally travel alone again.
May 2nd  2000, I jumped on a bus and popped into town,
It was just like my world had been turned upside down.
HERE WAS I FREE AT LAST,
Finally free to forget the past.
So I decided to do something I had never done before. 
I started at college part time, each day I couldn’t wait to get out of the door,
To catch my bus, to feel like I had finally rejoined the human race.
Living life at a hectic pace.
Going to college at the age of 53,
Really did do wanders for me.
The computer course was harder than I thought it would be, 
but others in the class helped me.
Our tutor was really nice,
Always ready with good advice.
Now I really feel I have turned my life completely around,
With this new freedom I have found.
With a lot of help, from my husband and son,
The battle is over, finally won.
So its goodbye agoraphobia you belong in the past,
Never again will you get me in your grasp.

This is a true poem of my own battle with Agoraphobia, That robbed me of a lot of my life, 


Details | Rhyme | |

As I Stand Here Waiting

The world keeps spinning on,
but I wish it could go backward instead.
Who have I become, where have I gone?
I don't even know what goes on inside my own head.
I am not this person I have become,
I never was and thought I never would be.
This is someone else,
This is not me.

My priorities have shifted,
I value things that once meant very little.
I search for things to fill the gap,
but only find things that are noncommittal.
Happiness in one night packages,
is what fills my life now.
I'm not sure why,
I'm not sure how.

I want more,
but do I deserve it?
This battle is repeated inside my head,
but I will never truly admit it.
I know I could do more
I know I could be greater.
But in my own head,
I am a master debater.

I'm so afraid of failing,
that while I hide that's exactly what I'm doing.
I have so many hopes and dreams,
but are any of them even worth pursuing?
What if I fall flat on my face?
In front of everyone I know and love?
But then again I could be better than I expect,
go beyond and above.

You never know what the future holds,
only what has happened in the past.
In order to make your future what you want,
you better live in the present while it lasts.
Seize each day,
and do what makes you happy.
For no one can see what lays ahead,
whether it be great or crappy.
I may not know who I have become,
but I do know who I want to be.
I want to be present in my life,
no more being an absentee.
The past is the past,
and the future lays before us.
The old me,
I will repossess.


Details | Sestina | |

Darkness

somewhere in the depths of self
pity holds a child tight
mind spills her dreams
on star-filled nights
and reflections of yesterdays
echo through mirrored smiles

through framed glass i trace her smiles
soon realizing child is self
i search memories of yesterdays
but mind's gate seems closed tight
darkened same as rainy nights
tears fall sofly like her dreams

if once i could fulfill her dreams
would my own face reflect smiles?
could mind find piece on sleepless nights
if  answers were released from self?
i seem to keep these memories tight
that robbed me of my yesterdays

not knowing the pain of these yesterdays
i've tucked away most old dreams
blocks of memory hold them tight
under lips bearing mona lisa smiles
and child withdraws within self
as days blend into nights

or dark thoughts blend days and nights
in all of these forgotten yesterdays
i choose not to pity self
just escape in new dreams
cracking occassional smiles
as loved ones hold me tight

yet when my eyes are pressed tight
i find myself fearing nights
quickly losing one of these smiles
to a brief memory of my yesterdays
safely tucking away all my dreams
deep within troubled self

seeking revenge on self with blades pressed tight
i try to hide through dreams from nights
haunted by yesterdays that robbed this child's smiles


Details | Narrative | |

Me, Myself, and I - (Part 1)

Hello Friends... I suffer from Severe Bi-Polar Disorder and this submission was inspired by 
actual events that occured during one of my especially critical manic episodes. Be sure and 
read Part 2 to complete the poem and leave your comments on the Part 2 submission. Thank 
you for allowing me to share my pain for pain shared is pain diminished 


Me, Myself, and I...


“There are things that concern us,”
		Consensed my “Selves” in earnest
““We” fear that “I” have succumbed to delusion”

“And after careful deliberation
		It is with much hesitation
That we choose to delineate upon this confusion”


“Fact is your intuition
		Is riddled with superstition
And your judgment leaves much to be desired”

“So you leave us no recourse
		Don’t push us to use force”
It is then that the “I” was summarily fired


I exclaimed “By whose authority?” Response, “Rule of majority”
“The “Myself” and the “Me,” (forthwith the “We”), are experts in our field”

“And with much technique and time
		And some forays into the sublime
The nature of your malady will be revealed”


“So to keep yourself from having a fit
		Step back and just calm down a bit”
“We,” they said, “certainly have this under control”

“We swear this won’t hurt at all”
		Then I felt my inhibitions fall
Still I said a prayer to God that He keep my soul


You know, fact is I do feel off axis
		As evidenced by such parapraxis
As this prose that I, (or is it “Us”), seek to pen

And with my mind feeling numb
		I finally chose to succumb
And allow the “Me” and the “Myself” to begin


And then came questions in a flurry
		Answer, answer and please do hurry
Not one moment of respite did they give

They pushed and they prodded
		With every “T” crossed and “I” dotted
My mind felt like it had gone through a sieve


And all this psycho-analysis
		Is causing my mind paralysis
The questions, can you stop with the questions please

“Yes, oh yes indeed
		I do believe we have what we need
To make an attempt to identify your unknown neuroses”


Details | Rhyme | |

The Hospital Fairyland

THE HOSPITAL FAIRYLAND

They walked together, hand in hand,
Into life’s magical fairyland.
Where there was no trouble, where there was no pain.
Where life could really, begin all over again.
Where were no men in little white coats.
Forcing you all, to stuff drugs down your throats.
Forcing you to do, what you didn’t want to.
Telling you it was all for the best, for you,
People shouting, people crying.
Most of the people talking about dying.
What is this hell, we’ve all come to?
It’s called coming off drugs, we all have It to go through.
Where will it end, what will we do?
None of us really, has a clue.
We are given more pills, we are told, we have to take.
To the men in white coats, life’s a piece of cake.
We are the prisoners, they guard the doors.
Some try to creep out, on all fours.
Into hell and back, we go for a ride.
Eventually if we’re lucky, we come out the other side.
Where we can walk, hand in hand.
Into life’s magical Fairyland.
Where there is trouble, where there is pain.
But at least we can start, living again.


Details | Rhyme | |

Let Him Go

This poem I wrote. I call it " Let Him Go "

Sweetheart don't cry
Don't let him make you feel like your nothing
You do have family even though we are not close by
I know your heart is crushing
Don't harp on the past
Don't let him play with your head
You need to get over him fast
His feelings for you are dead
Over 2 years and you still don't have a ring
Your not the one he calls his wifey to be no more
Take a seat and listen up girl here is the thing
He's playing with your feelings and using you like a two dollar whore
I know you were smart once and can be again
He has you so brain washed it's not funny
I know hearing all this is a strain
Think of the example your setting for you little ones honey
Hold your head high and walk away from that loser mama's boy 
Show him that your the one that is too good for his sorry ass
Hell he's such a mama's boy you can find better pleasure in a toy
Your related to me so come on show your sass 
Let go of the past and look to a new future
Let go of the pain and the control freak
Say bye bye Looser
It will get easier one step at a time week by week......


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

RUNAWAY TRAIN

    RUNAWAY TRAIN

A runaway train a life full of pain
Running avoiding the hurt
Getting away with lies, dancing in the rain
Treating everyone like dirt
Call me insane 
I am my on freak on my runaway train

Running like the gingerbread man
Running as fast as I can
Catch me now if you can
Abandoning every life  plan
Removing the ones in my life I cannot stand
Finding myself in  Rome
How the Hell  did i end up in another land
Take me French men by the hand
Sent me back with the runaway brand

Trust me it is no joy to feel like a toy
Runaway train has been my only joy
Leaving everything behind
Meting myself as a homeless in every cargo
Runaway train in my on matchbox
Runaway train lighting up the flames
Runaway train my life full of speed
Running avoiding my hearts need
Tracking me down and you'll find me in my own  
( Soul Asylum) lost in a ( Runaway Train)



********A FUN SPROUT 
My runaway train has ended
, everyone joined, jumped in my cargo
My runaway train all the supers   mended 
Waiting on them who joined my Wells Fargo
Thank you  everyone for closing the contest, 
In less than 24 hrs. Did not expect that.
Being my first contest and all,
I looked for one thing i needed to see. 
A different point of view Of what I wrote above

SKAT


Details | Munaajaat | |

Tell Me

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know

Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know

Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that

You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know

You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand

You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel

How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door

You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me, you owe me that much



Sabrina Niday Hansel
~Niday40873~

(motif) Spiritual


Details | Free verse | |

If I Had The Guts

I know i have kept a lot from you.
I know its not fair. 
I know i should tell you.
I know i have to tell you.

Maybe i can tell you some, but not all.
Maybe i can keep it secret just a little longer.
Maybe i can hide it from you more.
Maybe i can get the guts to tell you everything.

Everyday, i wanna tell you.
Everyday, i hope i get the guts to tell you.
Everyday, i feel bad for not telling you.
Everyday i think about you.

Sometimes, i dont want to tell you.
Sometimes, i just want you to know it all.
Sometimes, i wish i never knew you.
Sometimes, i wish you were all mine.

If i had the guts, i would tell you everything.
If i had the guts, i would tell you how much you mean to me.
If i had the guts, i would tell you your the only reason im alive.
If i had the guts, i would tell you my biggest secret.

Just knowing that i love you.
Just knowing that you may or may not love me back.
Just knowing that i care.
Just knowing that you probably dont.

Breaks my heart.
Breaks my soul.
Breaks my dreams.
Breaks my life.

If i had you, my life would be complete.
If i had you, my life would be perfect.
If i had you, i would be happy.
If i had you, i wouldnt have to search anymore.

I know i should tell you.
I know its not fair.
I know i have kept a lot from you.
I know i should tell you.

But, i dont have the guts, 
The guts to tell you i love you,
The guts to tell you your the reason im alive,
The guts to tell you,
I need you in my life.


Details | Free verse | |

Bladder Problems in Class

Numbers on 
White board…names written hori-
zontally

Students ask
To go pee…right when class starts – 
THAT’S just wrong…

Bathroom line
Of students who have bladder
Problems – WOW!

People are
Not using lunchtime to do 
Their business 

No one knows
When to do their duties – SER-
IOUSLY?


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Shunned

Breaking down in the heart and mind.
With all regrets that are truly not kind.
Shocked at people are, so painful to see.
Abused with hated and ecstasy.
Violated and directed with torments
Lost of words or comments.
Hatred gushing out of life long experience.
Reminding yourself to become absence.
Coward and scared to even breathe.
Like the feeling of knives unsheathe.
Sharp but not enough to cut.
Enough to scare like a door that immediately shut.
The hand raised to help you is a lie.
It is a hand that slaps you so you can die.
Rough around the edges.
Crawling in your dreams in ledges.
Powered to stay alive.
You feel people want you to take a dive.
Just stop, and fall down.
Hoping to break your mental crown.
Hiding a feeling that never feels real.
Like shaking hands with demons for a deal.
Blocked out, out of your own story.
Thinking that people are stealing your glory.
Ashamed with fear.
With eyes that are full of tear.
Lost in such hidden romance.
Luck has it seems to be a dance.
Moving around in your head.
With scary thoughts and dread.
Feels like you never leave.
So you feel so many that grieve.
In your mind that is lost.
Full of drama that holds you down in cost.
Keeping in the shadow.
You watch people so shallow.
Gut instinct says that life with them is a muse.
When your just standing your accuse.
Society is just so lame.
Like all the people that are in it your to blame.
Soloing life is a brief.
Walking away is some what a relief.
I dreamed of many things.
With beautiful sorrows of wings.
Wavered in a direction that leads no where.
Escaping everything by a hair.
Pointing into the sky.
And asking yourself why.
The cage is so big.
Just enough to put on a huge rig.
Moving back and fourth.
It feels that your life does not have a worth.
Caned by laws of laughter to deceive.
Shackled up to be bent to your will to receive.
When you hope to hope.
A person can just show you the rope.
They have such friendly hands.
Like the deserts of sands.
Dangerous it is to just keep walking in it.
Lost cannot find your way even a little bit.
Just seem like your heart feels dry.
Then you give up and give a sigh.
That moment that you do is just all a dream.
You are really in a ward you will scream.
Thrust upon you because you could not protect.
So what cost you is this effect.
Warping in to your mind to leave this place.
You feel full of disgrace.
With nothing to drink.
Causing your true self to think.
Grief is such a pain with sorrow to gain.
Looking out in your own rain.




Details | Ballad | |

I'm Sorry

 im sorry ive caused you pain.
i thank you for sticking by me through everything.
and not giving up on me. i dnt no what
i would do if you had given up on me.
 
Im sorry ive lied to your face and you knew it,
but you still loved me the same as before.
so i thank you.
i dont know if i would be here with you if you had given up on me.
 
im sorry ive broken your trust over and over,
and you still wanna trust me.
i thank you again.
i dont know wat i would have done if you didnt trust me.
 
im sorry ive done things behind your back,
even though i promised you i would never do them.
im sure you knw but you never said anything.
i wish you would have. it would have saved us all alot of pain
 
i thank you for never giving up on me.
i dont no how to tell you how much i love you.
 
mom i love you sooooooo much you wont ever no how much i love u and thank you for everything


Details | Quatrain | |

My Chagrin

Once again to my chagrin
     This nightmare perseveres
And through the glass it comes to pass
     To feed upon my fears

And it seems to slay my dreams
     And in their stead leave blind
Mine own two eyes to that one prize
     My soul doth seek to find

Still I pray that night gives way
     And cures this circumstance
That captive holds my weary soul
     Within it's darkened trance

And perhaps lay loose the straps
     That bind me to this cross
And free from 'round my neck now bound
     This curs'ed albatross


Details | Lyric | |

This Aint Real

Your face, 
Made a fake smile, (you said)
I love you,
I need you,
I want you just for a while,
You told me,
That I made you smile,
All the things you said to me,
Are just words now,
How can we love,
When you love me for yourself,
(This Aint Love)

Chorus: 2x
What are we doin,
If this love ain't real,
What is this feeling,
That I feel,

I'm broken in emotion,
I'm broken in love, (you said)
I need you,
I want you
You're the only one,
I'm thinkin of, (so tell me)
How can we love, 
When there's always someone else,
(This Aint Love)

Chorus 2x
Bridge:
How can we love,
When there's always someone else,
How can we make up,
When you only love me for yourself,

verse #3:
You got me imprisoned, 
Inside your heart,
When kissed
I felt, Like we,
Would never be apart,
chorus 2x

 


Details | Sonnet | |

Gambling Shuggy—The Encounter!

"If I feel physically,
            as if the top of my head been taken off, 
                     I know it's poetry."
                       --Emily Dickenson

          ~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~

No money no honey from this honey
You may look but won’t rub this fine tummy;
That maybe so, but I ain’t no dummy
Shining like gold—don’t you touch this Emmy!

Pay gone, drunk, smoky, come acting thuggy,
Don’t treat me like an Egyptian mummy;
You have nerves to tell me I look yummy
Step back—know that I will not be chummy!

Say what, you will find another bunny?
Git, to your saloon playing gin rummy;
Tonight I’m keeping safe my sweet plumy
Leave—before I pull my New York Jimmy!

Swiftly, before doorknob hit your bunny,
Shuggy—I ain’t got time tonight bummy!

© Joseph, November 28, 2008
© All Rights Reserved

~~~~~~~~~~~*******~~~~~~~~~~~
Poetry Soup International Poetry Contest
Semi-finalist Selection, Jan. 2009.
~~~~~~~~~~~*******~~~~~~~~~~~
Poetry Soup Weekly Featured Poem 
Sunday, May 24, 2009, to May 31, 2009
~~~~~~~~~~~*******~~~~~~~~~~~

Joseph S. Spence, Sr., is the author of "The Awakened One Poetics" (2009), which is 
published in seven different languages. He invented the Epulaeryu poetry form, which 
focuses on succulent cuisines and drinks. He is published in various forums, including the 
World Haiku Association; Poetinis Druskininku, Milwaukee Area College, Phoenix Magazine; 
Möbius Poetry, and Taj Mahal Review to name a few. Joseph is a Goodwill Ambassador for 
the state of Arkansas, USA, a college faculty, and a military veteran.

~~~~~~~~~~~*******~~~~~~~~~~~


Details | Personification | |

Puzzle Piece

A puzzle piece you are to me 
Like a vine without any leaves. 
Your heart is pure your soul is 
Gold, the sweetest thing I'll 
ever hold! A miracle in my eyes 
it seemed, knowing they said 
no babies for me! Always a 
surprise you seem to be just 
like a puzzle piece! At 9 months 
you walked but not until 4 did 
you first talk! Always a terror 
making a beautiful mess always 
a surprise that has yet to be 
met! The twists and turns I 
know we will see will seem 
somewhat like a roller coaster 
to me! The milestones and 
special gifts you bring will make 
my life seem Like a dream, my 
special boy I have always said 
How special I knew not till 
Aspergers they said! The 
journey will be trying the 
journey will seem long! But 
with our family together we will 
chug along! My special boy I 
love you so and cannot wait to 
see you mature and grow! Now 
we have a goal we have our 
dream you see to make you the 
perfect fitting puzzle piece!! 


Written by: Christina Kirks 
McCullouch 04/05/2012 For 
Jonathan S McCullouch Jr 
Mommy loves you to eternity 
and beyond! Forever and 
always!



Details | Narrative | |

New Paths

A new path is what we seek.
The surroundings are taking a peek,
Going through, very meek,
Seeing no bleaks,
Getting piqued,
While hearing creaks,
In the new paths that we seek...

The new path is what is found,
Going through forests bound,
Going through the path inbound,
With soothing and raging water sounds.
Walking confound,
Silence profounded,
Sight astounded,
Passed through burial grounds...

Seeking for another way around,
Noises resound,
Spirits surround,
The paths newfounded,
Our instincts compounded,
Followed by the hounds,
Echoes in ultrasounds,
Passed through mysterious breeding grounds...

Going to stamping grounds,
Trying to get off this ground,
With those burial mounds,
Death moving the wheels around,
Silhouettes running aground,
Trying to leave safe and sound,
Passing through some hunting grounds...

Seeking for common grounds,
The mistaken path redounded,
Regretful screams abound.
Plans propounded,
Though some are fouled,
Throughout the paths that were found...

However, most are lost and wounded,
Most tended to walk out,
Some minds and hearts full of doubts.
Hearing salvation shouts,
From all these new paths walked and found...


Details | Narrative | |

The People Around Me

Things seems to be very clear,
When actually felt it is unclear,
What really seems to be clear,
May never ever be clear for ever.

Your help for others,
May be to be appreciated,
Or taken as what is called,
to be uncounted.

My question is clear,
Why the help for others,
Is sometime never appreciated,
However it is always delivered. 

In response to ethics,
lingers in my mind the answer,
To help others is not to be recognised, 
But it is to be called someone, 
Who can be respected.

To all, continue to help,
Not to to be appreciated by others,
But to be respected by yourself.


Details | Burlesque | |

Redneck FATHER'S DAY------

***NOTE~TO BE READ WITH A RIDICULOUS "SILKY SOUTHERN DRAWL" (have fun:)***



"Storm over yet...?"

"Well hay'ell ye'ah! 
 woo-hoo!
 sum'body git me a da'gumm cole beer.
 whadda'bou  that boy th'er?
 sum'body git him'a cole beer too!"

"Diddy! that boy ain't nothin' but 8 years old!"

"Wha'choo sayin? 
 wha'th'a?
 na'I don't give a jolly'durn, if he ain't nuttin but 8 year'owed!
 shoot! 
 'dat boy dun' sat him thr'ew a big ol', storm! 
 torna'durr warnin' too!
 he gonna have him'a cole burr;  
 on me!"
 my treat!
 mama, git him'a cole burr! 
 ro'tt now; 
 ya'here?
 besides...
 ta'days father's day!" 



© 2011  ~JSLambert Esquire

   










Details | Quatrain | |

Mystic Tinklings

                   Mystic Tinklings


Mystic tinklings
	Ancient echoes from the past
Fleeting inklings
	Glimmer just beyond your grasp

Phantom footfalls
	When you know that you’re alone
Echoed choircalls
	Of a long forgotten song

Shadows slipway
	From the corners of your eye
Darkened hallways
	Hints of time passed by

Brief reflections
	Of things you did not see
Vast collections
	Of the things that used to be


Details | Free verse | |

STILL

I have developed a temporary dislike of the things that I’ve convinced myself have been keeping you away from me. Mere substitutes that admitted to the murder of your mind.

This phone, and this 11 o’clock moon have slayed my reason’s for not just blaming your wandering eye.

Most of these nights I’ve tried Ctrl.Alt.Del.(ing) any ridiculous thoughts, by selecting all of the frequently frustrating things that know just how to push my buttons. I don’t know why I’m speaking in computer terms, but lately I haven’t been able to function quite right unless I’m near one. It’s the only way to get near you.

Most of these nights, this phone has been the entire left side of my brain, but now my mattress has memorized the rhythm to a ringtone it should’ve never been introduced to, and now the stupid cushion keeps me awake until it has made sure that I’ve felt it vibrating up my spine. My intuitive, creative right brain seems to remember being together with it’s brother each and every time I remember laying together beside you.

I wait for a wanting of your wanting. Muscle memories of warm bodies wrapped up in positions that make your mind say ‘what the ****?’ I am missing you. The you who remembers that the other members of her body are always here to help; no need to amputate a listening ear, or an gouge out an attentive eye. I still see you.

Sometimes, I forget that the phone’s main function is to send a signal of information to someone you can’t see. Whether it be via text, twitter app or vocally, you want to reach someone you can’t see. I still see you.

Sometimes, I swear I can see each of the moon’s phases during the day;  completely filled with life during the time when it’s nearly invisible. It’s sad though, because New Moon, you show yourself to everyone else except me on the nights I always expect to see your face. Is this a trick man? or have my eyes been gouged out already, and I simply missed the painful message via text, twitter app or vocally? But still, whether with two eyes, four eyes or no eyes, I still see you.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Trip on, Trip up

Walk before you speak.
Lend your voice that seek.
Foot forward and back.
So will that be a fact.
Gone by and be well.
Trip up and put into a cell.
Got no one to talk to.
I want a phone call to sue.
When I wake from my slumber.
I wish not to be hit by lumber.
Going to become a dreamer.
I hope that I do not become a screamer.
I got new shoes.
With colorful strings that are loose.
I am slow on tying them.
I feel they are harder than stem.
String are not new.
They smell pew.
I walk once again to journey.
That means I need some money.
Trip up again with meaningless acts.
Walking with out trust that lacks.
Shamefulness I speak.
I go behind a tree to leak.
I have no home set in stone.
Wheeling and dealing always alone.
Since I was a child that was left on the street.
I became a street beat.
Strolling with confidence to day.
Making my way.
Some law men stop me.
I was so out of it that they can see.
They thought I was on drugs.
I was really itching bugs.
Stumbling because I have not eaten.
So they grab me and I got beaten.
They finally found me innocent.
So I told them to get bent.
I was a good citizen with high hopes.
The society today thinks I am on dopes.
Can I be help with no pain.
Will they put me some were I will gain.
So I was put into a helpful place.
I was then able to eat and say grace.
Some crazy person came in and started shooting. 
So people ran and started looting.
Cannot get away from bad luck.
Sure enough I feel so stuck.
Knowing that I was fleeing.
I became worth not seeing.
I lay there my time just feeling has pass.
Losing my mind and running out of gas.
Finally I hear a person the sound sounds so weak.
A life time that I wanted to seek.
Found myself in a bed.
Down to nothing I was shed.
A person with white clothes that said your in luck.
You survived and now you owe some buck.
So sad not really glad.
Bad thing was the kid that was shooting was my lad.
Time really passes I just want to walk.
To see my kid to talk.
Why did he do what he did.
Dad he said I was starving and I am a kid.
So I have turn to a life time of crime.
Dad do not give me your time.
Because when we talked long ago.
You just left home with all the doe.
Hope you have a good life.
Because mom had been a good wife.
Now it is your turn.
So you can walk into the fire and burn.
With out a doubt you will walk away.
Trip on and Trip up and you will never pay.
Now dad keep your love.
Because I seek my mother above.
You will be chain.
Down you go insane.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Loyalty Bond

How kind of you to think of me
On this beautiful autumn day
Were your thoughts regarding your loyalty?
Or were they thoughts rehearsed to display?

Such a powerful thing, this loyalty bond
Something we all inevitably yearn
A bond of trust and fidelity
A bond which we all must earn

Many will take it lightly
Most will not understand
Some will honor and embrace it
Yet the majority will heartily disband

I laugh at the thought of the loyalty bond
The yearning of a bond which does not exist
Its amazing how all of us will long for
An illusion so easily dismissed


Details | Sonnet | |

THE BOMBING OF DRESDEN

      THE BOMBING OF DRESDEN     
        February 13, 1945
Pathfinders lit the night to show the way
for bombardiers too hungry for the word;
as Dresden's dark was made as light as day,
all hearts were stopped before the blasts were heard;

and as the din was heard by all their ears
the sound it made was not reality
but far removed from all the hopes and fears
and what they thought would never come to be.

They loved the Fuhrer--sin enough for all
to die the fiery death of sweet revenge
brought on by those who had enough of gall
to drop their loads in wartimes heated binge!

       And when the fire consumed all that it could
        the winter of their lives was understood.


Details | Lanterne | |

Fried Green Tomatoes The Movie

He 
did not
Bar-be-que
Frank to hide death
Did??


Details | Pantoum | |

They Took Away My Innocence

They took away my innocence—
A child, but merely two years old.
My soul left with ambivalence;
I hate myself as I grow old.

A child, but merely two years old—
Abandoned, glossed over, abused.
I hate myself as I grow old;
Completely left confused and used.

Abandoned, glossed over, abused—
Why would a person hurt a child?
Completely left confused and used—
Naïf, so trusting, meek, and mild.

Why would a person hurt a child?
My soul left with ambivalence—
Naïf, so trusting, meek, and mild.
They took away my innocence.

	



Details | Free verse | |

The Wall, The Wall

The Wall, The Wall

I
the world fades from my fingertips
like blood oozing from an open wound
the sky is ripped apart and full of thunder
and my eyes are twisted in pain

shut the door and lock me within
the light is buzzing and flickering
something is about to explode
or maybe thats just my soul

softly touch the wall and it corrodes
the white paint peels and turns black
and cracks appear on the surface
a garbage touch that ruins it all

for years the signs of ruin were there
building up behind fragile white walls
and now i sit here with an open chest
my heart nailed to the damned wall

and as the world fades from my fingertips
like blood from an open wound
the sky outside is bloody and tormented
and i cant begin to see my own reality

II
im so afraid that if i get up ill fall again
damned by the ghosts of the past
the flashing glare of reality looms larger
closing in on me and slapping me

if only someone could open the door
and let me out of this foreboding room
perhaps i could see more than whats inside
instead of slicing myself in half

remember it was your verse that ended me
slicing off my fingers one by one
it was when my heart was nailed to the wall
that i truly forgot how to feel

my sickening screams echo loudly
throughout the confines of my own mind
reverberating down my spine
and leaving me in a shivering fit

as the world fades from my fingertips
like blood pouring from an open wound
the sky outside has faded to a deep black
and i cant begin to see my own reality


Details | Narrative | |

Like Gold Dust

Pile up treasures; rise and fall.
And want the lake and not the land fall,
Hold the bizarre beast, I wish wife.
My life is abandoned to the Life.

Behold an ideal idol of a wife:
The down fall will soon be late,
Whilst the crescent lake will wait;
This day will emerge another life.

Now bread and butter set on the table,
But miss the compassionate ring of able,
And call for the lonely wandering widower,
This moment can’t afford losing her.

Should I accept the defeat of livelihood,
And immortalize the spirit of widowhood?

My life is given to the Light.
These episodes of testing I can’t face:
I plant prayer for its erase,
And wind for a save and safe alight.


Details | Lyric | |

Solipsist

Let the Deicide commence.

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart is beating out of your chest!
And you have slayed the ones whom would love you for anything less
Ready to consume the final fragments of innocence,
And for you there is no forgiveness,
On your knees pleading, screaming to a tyrant in the skies;
The father of lies.

I will never be enslaved in your superiority
The people agree: jaded of your false dichotomies.
Know: I will be whomever nature intends to be
Apollo and I will share our dreams,
and you will be forced to see
your failure!

I know who you are...
Readily the first to present your scars
Chained by some despot or mental czar
An emotional homunculus in your mind, behind bars
Reluctant to escape - even when proven fake
Your demented mind - depths no one will penetrate!
 
...And you see me suffering
Not caring of any casualties
Just as long you recieve your safeguard of sympathy
So very wary of the masses and their Anarchy; Liberious ways

Solipsist - Is there no one you can see?
Even if she was presented burning?
Solipsist - Is there no one you can believe?
Even if Sophia was screaming?
Solipsist - Know you have killed and abused me
Imprisoned in your own  personal reality 




Details | Rhyme | |

Thoughts That Grow Louder

With a whispered thought comes a dream
To be above the shame and guilt
Of losing pride in what would seem,
To most, the whole of what we built.

With a quiet thought comes the fear,
And shadows close the doors of reason.
I see racing frames of pictures clear, 
Rendering unbearable deeds of treason.

With that clear thought, I stand corrected-
So much love has come and gone,
But I, alone, must stay connected 
To what I know and where I belong.


Details | Acrostic | |

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!


Details | Rhyme | |

ELECTION, WHAT ELECTION ???

What's the point in voting
it really dosn't count, 
I thought the highest scorer
knocked the others out.
But no,no, no............
I hear you shout
We are the people
we do not count.
Polititians rule the country
that is really true
They really do not listen
to the likes of me and you.
All this,' let the people have a say'
it's a load of rubbish
We all line up in the rain,
to place our'X' to vote and wish....
But it is all in vain I tell you
they won't let us have our say,
they get us in debt,.. we're up to our neck
they promise us this
And give a smarmy smile
and they promise us that
telling more lies, all the while 
when it comes to delivering, huh.......
I dont think they know how the truth is told
they come out with the same excuses
to come clean with truth,...... they're not that bold
Hung parliment...huh
I know who we'd like to hang
Guy Faulks had the right idea
send Parliament up with a 'Bang'


Details | Light Poetry | |

- Virgin Birth -



                                       Reproduction without sex

                                             Eggs and sperm

                                    taken out of the bone marrow

                                     Reproduction or virgin birth

                                            Is it magic or biology

                                   Is this the world we want to live in





26.03.2013
A-L Andresen :)


Details | Personification | |

Not Really

How it must hurt you so on days like this,
  Walking around with a frown clutching your fist.
Hearing the words that are meant to anger you,
   Confused  you cry because there is nothing you can do.
Your mind is playing tricks on you driving you to say,
    I hate you all and the games you play please just go away.
Trusting nobody you are not sure which way you sould go,
    It's not real and  all in your head  is what you do not know.
Waiting to see just what tomorrow will possibly bring,
    All will be perfect and you wont rememver a thing.
Your thoughts they torement you  almost every day,
   Each night asking our Lord why your life is this way.
Feeling so alone thinking there is nobody who cares,
   But actually there is so many but you are not aware .
If only you would hear me so you might begin to see,
   You must believe in yourself if you want to be free.
You must have some faith if you are to understand ,
    What God has in store for you and what he has planned.
All the hurt and anger will soon begin to disappear ,
    You'll stand up tall again facing life with no fear.
Please remember always that you are never alone,
    By listening with your heart your path will be shown.
TAC


Details | Rhyme | |

I Went to Church Last Sunday

I Went to Church Last Sunday… I went to church last Sunday, and heard a lesson… I felt like I was almost in a “delicatessen.” A “menu” was served, with a “meal” given. And a “pep talk’” on “how good we’re livin’! We were asked to shake a hand, “and meet a friend.” “But don’t say anything that may offend!” Our comfort was sought after, with “love” in mind! We were taught to be “considerate and kind!” We sang a few songs, and raised a few hands… And got up and down, all through the stands! A pastor spoke a message, he wanted to be taught. A “feel good” message is what he sought! How many “feel good” messages do we need? In what direction does this church want to lead? Is it one that doesn’t have a fear of God, from within? Is this a place where one can find freedom from sin??? We need more than a Sunday lesson, to change this nation! We need God’s power! With Holy Ghost conviction! We need pastors that are on fire, with a passion and zeal! And the believe that Christ’ coming is very real! May there be a new focus, of Christ’ death on the cross! And much more emphasis on reaching the lost! Going to church On Sunday, doesn’t mean a thing… If living 100 percent for Jesus, doesn’t mean anything! May your church on Sunday be stirred from above! And be filled with God’s power, his holiness and love!!! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Monoku | |

Life

I live to die then, I die to live again


For David Williams' "Chiasmus Contest"
03/23/2012
6th Place Winner


Details | Free verse | |

We Welcome the Sun

We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun 

A gleaming sunrise is seen in the distance – shedding relief 
Bursting forth like fireworks in the dark blue sky 
Hues of beauty and sincerity washes away our grief
The cheery clouds come together like lovers embracing one another

I’m never waving goodbye
   
It’s so surreal… and magnificent to see this scene unfold
You lift up the sparkling light… you’re an angel from up above
It’s so vibrant – the illuminated sight never dulled 
You bring us luck and excitement – 

You’re as pleasant as a dove 

We welcome the sun
We welcome the love
We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun 
To omit the darkness 
To abolish the distress
To conceal the darkness
And reveal the halo
Hovering around your head
Burning away the dread 
We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun 
We welcome the sun

An ocean of love is rubbing against my feet
Blankets of comfort embrace me now… our love will never dry
You treat us with reverence and I repeat – 
You’re as pleasant as a dove – taking wing from on high 
We welcome the sun in the morning 
We welcome the sun with open arms
We welcome the sun 
We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun 
We welcome the sun 

A speedy breeze is whistling in my ears
Spiraling mad like a spinning top
Spiraling mad with all of its might 
You’re very intriguing – you casted away our fears 
Your gorgeous eyes
Project bright green and blue
You’re special in His sight 
He welcomes you
We welcome the hope 
We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun 
To lighten up your load 
And lead you to the mercy road
Where you and I will escape to paradise
To drive out all of the negativity
To conceal the wretched farewells
To reveal the light in goodbye 

We welcome the sun
We welcome the sun
We welcome you
With open arms 


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

WET DREAMS

        WET DREAMS
I know not why your love's evading me
nor what to do, so that your heart can see,
my passion grows no matter what I do
and makes my heart to keep on loving you
though all it's brought is pure insanity;

in dreams I've wept, but kept on loving you
and tears, they flow, no matter what I do,
I tried to take my burning love in hand
but it's a thing my heart can't understand,
and sleep won't tell what love is coming to;

if I could dream the dream both night and day
I'd spend my life just sleeping where I lay
and waking from the dream in burning sweat,
I lie content, and feel my hand is wet
from love you've given me, in your own way.
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa


Details | Rhyme | |

The Talent God Gave To Me


God gave me talents and abilities to use! The love he blessed me with. I wouldn’t refuse! I wanted to use what was given. I really did! I had no idea this would change how I live! I spoke to the Lord with a heart felt confession. Using my God given talent was my obsession! People from church listened. It didn’t seem to matter. There was too much “business”, “gossip” and “chatter” I talked to the pastor about the desire I had on my heart. I could tell he didn’t care… Right from the start! In my efforts to serve God, I most certainly tried. There were many nights I laid awake and cried! In my efforts to use God’s talents, I often felt alone. I didn’t want to go anywhere. I stayed at home. I wanted to give to others, the love God gave to me! But I was alone now… It was so plain to see! The many from church that I thought were my “friend.” Would often criticize me again and again! They told me that I wasn’t good at what I wanted to do. “How could God use somebody like you???” God picked me up when I felt very discouraged and down… He filled me with his spirit. His presence was all around! He took my futile efforts to use me any way he could. Everything I was going through... He understood!. I’ve been able to share his mercy and love that he’s given! His power and grace have changed how I’m livin’! I don’t need others “permission” for the talents I received. His will in my life is what I aim to achieve! His word and love have blessed me within! I’ll do anything for my savior and friend! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

The Destruction of Mankind

The Destruction of Mankind!

Throughout the Bible’s history, you’ll find…
The wickedness and destruction
 of mankind!

There were kingdoms that have come and gone!
They took pride, and thought
 they were strong!

No matter how strong men make think they may be…
Everyone needs to make plans for their eternity!

There’s many things that people have enjoyed…
But. there’s coming a day when it’ll all be destroyed!

The Bible says that we all have failed and sinned!
What a terrible mess that we find ourselves in!

Our answer and only hope is with Jesus today!
Only he can wash the darkness and sin away!

Only he can bring a completeness to our soul!
And can bring all we need to make us whole!

May God’s Holy Spirit reach out and convict us!
That we all may know,
 only God can help us!


By Jim Pemberton


Details | Alliteration | |

My Love

My love I can not find you anywhere, 
I feel like I lost my soul somewhere, 
because you are my soulmate, 
and us being apart can not be fate. 

You did not leave because you wanted to, 
It just was just something you had to do. 

I was not right, All I wanted to do was fight, 
and knowing you was the love of my life, 
yet I would not make you my wife. 

I know that's what you really wanted 
and now I am feeling haunted, 
by the things I should have done, 
and you being the only one 
I ever loved and will love forever, if it was'nt for me we will still be together. 
 
But you are gone 
and I can not go on, 
so I must say good-bye, I'm leaving myself to die.


Details | Rhyme | |

Happiness in a Wrong way

Happiness in a Wrong way – Zamreen Zarook

In the notion of seeking happiness,
I thought of stepping in to nonsense,
I dream I could find success,
But I had only little access.

Every attempt that I lend,
It was an utter failure at the end,
My life was full of difficult bend,
But God is always there as a good friend.

My deeds travel in various ways,
Some times in subways,
Or in times it goes in highways,
But I had the belief, God is there always.

North and south families surrounded,
East and west friends are rounded,
Every time fear on death soughed,
I am trapped, and my merits are loaded.


Details | I do not know? | |

Love Isn't

I know I'm awake
I know how to open my eyes
But i don't know why i can't see

I feel time moves on
I hear the clock ticking
But I never felt time stops

I've seen the burning sun
stung by the burning cold
But never faced a tornado

Touched many colors
never seen a rainbow

seen the Nile
crossed the seas
But never been under a waterfall

Read the book many times
never turned over the page

Walked in many directions
never tried falling down

Never had to think of what I didn't
Never tried to change what I wasn't

Now you know all the symptoms
Now you know what love ISN'T.


Details | Ballade | |

To Sit All Alone

I sit so alone in the chill of the night
I feel in my heart a hand takes a hold
How is it so that I feel this great fright
This fear isn't young, this fear is quite old
All of the dreams crying at midnight, told
Oh how I'm sad, so alone in this dark
Let the flame in my heart, yield and ignite 
To begin my journey, too timid to embark.

To walk each step, to blur out of sight
To hold to the words that I said all so bold
To bow in my heart, my soul is contrite
How easy it was, my ambitions I sold
I sat there lonely, not to be controlled
Oh how I'm sad, so alone in this dark
I can not control this, this horrible fright
I must not allow myself not to embark.

I rejected your counsel, your words of insight
With my arms crossed, eyes I but rolled
How can I grasp the essence of light
When paranoid actions tend to enfold
The uncertain man with a touch all too cold
I must not be sad, so alone in the dark
For I can control this, this horrible fright
I will take these few steps, now I'll embark

I say this hopefully for my fear has been told
I hope more who sit, so alone in the dark
Will open their eyes and look not so cold
Will stand up and, dare to embark


Details | Narrative | |

The Ego Monster

The ego monster came one day and settled near a vulnerable soul
Begot intended alteration, to turn Diamond, into coal
This soul it hurt from melancholy, a lost and lonely, sobbing mess
Perceived, drastic solutions, might remedy their grief and stress.
It whispered false suggestions, that soul needed none and was alone
And tricked the soul with toxic trust, then set it on a paper throne

The soul required more conformation of how unique. they lusted be
Then faked a mirror of illusion of everything they wished to see.
The ego monster taught soul words like biggest, toughest, richest, best
Offered soul a moral compass, that turned north to south and east to west.
Injected soul with huge desires to gain more power than they deserved
Convinced soul that their path was straight, though it was warped and curved.

One day whilst strolling round the past, desiring to re-visit there
Soul glanced into another them, a them, which laughed without a care
Then felt cold shards, cut cold shut eyes, saw emptiness within desire
And wondered why their heart was numb, when once there had been fire

They set upon an expedition to fix the damage to their soul
Compass in hand they trod the journey back, to fill the empty hole
The road was not as they remembered, signs there, did not belong
The compass pointed south, not north their compass must be wrong?

So blindly they retraced their steps to victories that they’d thought they’d won
Victories that they soon regretted, when they saw the damage they had done
The flimsy paper throne collapsed, as shame weighed heavy upon heart
At last they stood there, mortal, towing tons of wrongs upon their kart.

With open eyes and open mind they turned and faced their foe
Reluctant to face truths and lies, which lay within that ego
They battled insecurity, fought doubts and vanity
Till somewhere hid between it all they hacked up sanity

The harshest lessons learned are those that burn our souls repeatedly
A fool is only foolish when repeating their stupidity
Torturing ourselves for life about mistakes we now regret.
De-valuates the wisdom learned from wrongs we can’t forget
The ego monster searches for the anxious and defenseless
It’s swallowed, viewed, it’s said and heard, it’s touched, its smelt It's senseless
It’s thought about too often, confused with supremacy
But wisdom, strength and courage live in souls who’ve learned humility.
































Details | Free verse | |

Find My Place

For awhile, I thought I had.

New love. 
New dreams. 
New smiles.

Letting go, the small things that hurt.

They are tiny compared to past, trashed confidence.

Never quite finding my true place in the equation.
Maybe the answer is stuck in some ugly , frothing  math book, somewhere.
If so, I won't look there.
Why bother.

I am made of heart.
My only thinking muscle.

Whether beating with joy or pain,
it's beat is reliable.
Consistent.
Safe.

My only true measure of my own reality.

Even broken, it is less painful than letting it rely on misguided thoughts.
Feeling lost, while watching agendas, that seem to be the norm.

Other people's norms..........not mine.

I will never understand the meaning of "self first".
I have lived my life for others, since the day I cried at birth.
Abandoned.

My birth, an inconvenience to a womb.

My existence, to make a childless couple happy.
A friend, to soften the blows of life for the masses.
A Mother, to succeed and fail.
A lover, to give and give and give.

A spirit to fly.
A soul, to yearn.
A body to tire.

Watching simple selfishness, destroy our world.
Reaching with an open, soft hand.....just to so narrowly miss, sharing a loving 
touch.
A touch, that might have saved a sightless and misunderstood, silent innocent.

We stay in the background.
We have been conditioned by our own experiences, our own shortcomings, our 
passive tears.

A balance, perhaps?
To keep the equation from tipping over the universal rhythms?

I feel it.
Heavy, with doubts of belonging.

Wondering how the self absorbed agendas of the stronger minds, stay crisp.
No illusive smudges.
Never wilting.

No room for throwing the afore said agendas, into the hammock overviews, of a 
rotated picture.

Find my place?

I'm probably on a list, somewhere.


Details | Rhyme royal | |

Mirror Reflection, Can You Truly Reflect Me

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 
Mirror, mirror on the wall
I see what’s there but is that all?
Do I perceive what’s truly me?
Or is there more than what i see?
 Past the surface and what’s within
Why can’t I see beneath the skin?
Something's there I know it’s true
But how can I see it what can I do?
Do I turn away to truly see me?
Because there has to be more than what you show to me
Or is it shown can I just not see
What may be there in front of me?
can i look at the surface and truly see myself
Am I able to see what I’ve lost and what is left?
How will I know how can I see?
Past my skin and deep in of me?
I don’t know maybe I will one day
It is my will so I know I may.


Details | Ode | |

An Ode To My Beloved

I just wanted to let you know
That I have this love for you...
Although I'm not fast to show
For you, there's nothing I wouldn't do
And I can't control this love
No matter what I try to do...

While I know our lives are separating
Which has got me pretty blue
I just want you to know
How much I love you...

Because I was blinded by shyness
And now my heart's feeling rugged
So this here's An Ode To My Beloved 

Oh how I still see you every night in my mind
You're the best girl I feel I'll ever find
And when my eyes would fall upon your smile
My heart would be put on trial
And so if nothing else, I want to let you know
That I'll always love you, that my hearts beat
For you, won't ever slow...

Because I was blinded by shyness
And now my heart's feeling rugged
So this here's An Ode To My Beloved 

So I wish you happiness beyond compare
And sorry for the times I couldn't help but stare
Caring, passionate, smart, and loving
From my heart, to you, I'll never be shoving

You will always be in my heart
No matter where we go, how far we drift apart...

Goodbye My Love...


Details | Cinquain | |

Logic vs Emotion 2

logic
and emotion
coexist but conflict
heart and mind struggle to decide
who wins


Details | Free verse | |

Losing pieces

Oh, how I miss the dead…

... the softness in their voices
That I cannot recreate,
the warmth of their silence
Where now only cold remains;

And I know, oh how I know
That they are long gone
And I have been long removed
From those fuller times
But still, when I feel around my heart
I find that it is missing things
Parts long lost and dearly missed,
And I sit here feeling fatally incomplete
And I know-  that I can never be whole again.

But I still miss the dead,
And I miss the times
When I never knew
That I would live on
Missing the days when I was whole…

-So I still miss the dead
And the times when I was not hollowed by loss
Living every day with a lighter heart
So far from the times
 	when I would never be whole again.

And now, so far removed
from fuller times,
These few missing holes
they let in a chill wind
And somehow, these missing holes
they leave my heart heavy
And I know that it will grow heavier yet,
But I dread
That when I am lost
I die not just incomplete
But empty-
	Empty of all I could yet lose.


Details | Personification | |

I want to say Something

Something is in my heart
I want to say it
 
Words can't support me
How can I say it?

I want to know,
If you can bear it

Why can't I say it?

I am delighted,
If you want to hear it?

No, no, or never
Why can't I say it?


Details | Burlesque | |

The Impatient Patient

Today's true tom tale;

Today was Dr. day at the clinic
I ended up the day quite a cynic
I'd been awake three days,
With a toothache and pain that slays
My jagged teeth cutting up my tongue
And the promise of help to which I clung
For no more of this pain could I endure,
I desperately did seek some kind of cure

Appointment at 2:15- told the taxi 1:30
I knew the fib was a tad dirty...
"Hedge the bet" one might say,
Sad to think one must be that way,
Of course in this case he showed up at 1PM
And I was in the waiting room at 1:15
Fastest response I'd ever seen.

So I sat in the waiting room as
Clerical shifts came and went
My patience seemed nearly spent

At last I was escorted to an examining room,
To sit and ponder my future doom...
For over an hour I sat there,
Reading all the posters on the wall,
About various diseases,
Soon I had them all!
Cervical cancer,
Malignant volvulus,
Infected ovaries,
Fibroid tumors in my uterus,
A glumaceous gluteus,
Obstructed bowels,
Deviated septum
Leukemia,
Anemia, edemia
Enlarged prostate,
Shrunken prostate
Eczema, Lupus
Leprosy.....
All these for me!

I hoped he didn't keep me 
waiting too much longer,
Surely I wasn't getting stronger....
I'd be dead in ten more afflictions
If he could not cure all these conditions.

I felt my life force start to fade
Look at what these posters made!
Surely life was slipping away,
I couldn't stand,
I began to sway.

In he finally came,
Suddenly I did not feel
the same,
I might survive the day after all,
My approaching death grew
rather small.

Next time, bring a book,
For in terms of time,
It hardly took,
Much time to catch
All these ills,
Or at least come in,
With made out wills.


Details | Rhyme | |

God Will Take Care Of You

 
God Will Take Care Of You! Whatever struggles or trials you’re going through. God has already promised to take care of you! Whatever situation you’re in... Maybe there’s “no way out.” God remains faithful! This is what he’s all about! Perhaps it seems like all you’ve tried has failed you! God is here right now! His works surround you! The situations in life that you may face you… God is there! He is powerful and he loves you! Won’t you invite him in, to take control? And allow his peace and joy to fill your soul? Everything that you need! He has provided! His desire to help you, has already been decided! You can trust him to take care of your problems! Whatever they are… He can solve them! God’s word remains solid and is a true foundation! His words speak peace to any difficult situation! The awesomeness of God rings loud and clear! He’s here to help! He’s always near! He’s someone you can give your trust and believe in! His blessings in your life... You can receive them! He’s here right now … Won’t you call on his name? With him in your life… Things will never be the same! He’ll bring sweet peace and joy deep within. He will always be the one you can truly depend! All praise, glory and honor to God above.! Please touch us with your mercy, grace and love! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Elegy | |

Where are you

You flourished and blurred
like a spark on wind

Gracefully and quickly like a frightened hind
in pursuit of light

You harvested through bushy meadows
taken by blight

In struggle with plight
had you lost your might

And gave out
although never you gave up.

Where are you?
For you must be still there.

For I still can feel you
somewhere in the air.


Details | I do not know? | |

A Material Christmas

It's Christmas! Christmas!
That time of year
When people are filled...
With holiday cheer?

Yeah right. . .
I really do wish it were true
But people are people
Through and through

It's not about happiness anymore
Or in respect to what matters.
In reality it concerns what you get
And the food that is piled on the platters.

What has happened to the world of today?
Where is the 'loving and giving...'?
Now it is all just me, me, me.
Is this a nightmare? Or are we actually living.  

Yep we might have a lot of things
Hang on! Let's add some more
It isn't the family that I'm expecting
But the postman knocking at the door.

When the topic turns to Christmas cheer
Lets go stuff our faces...
Break out all that lovely beer!
Chuck away those graces!

But... Suddenly the month is over
There go all the gifts you gave
Your debt payments crawl closer and closer
And you become a material slave.






Details | Rhyme | |

Red Roses

Their petals are falling as their colors change
It wasn’t this way before but is it strange?
These roses are dying in delicate sweet sorrow
Will their love shed too? Or will it see tomorrow?
Petals and love falling slow like soft snowflakes
A little change in season is all it takes,
But will these roses bloom again in a new morn?
Will their love come back to greatly adorn?

Will their beauty be gone forever once it fades away?
Or will it come back to make everything okay?
For what will the roses be worth if their beauty dies forever?
Will the image and value from them permanently sever?
Will the light in their eyes suddenly become dark?
As their splendor and significance steadily grow stark? 
Or will they rise like light at the beginning of dawn?
And be reborn more beautiful than a swan?



Details | Rhyme | |

We Need God Back Into Our Schools

We Need God Back Into Our Schools!

There are some trying to remove God from this nation!
They do is under; “a church and state separation.”

For many years,  God was taught in our schools!
Until the Supreme Court took it away, with it’s rules!

As so many young people look to fill life’s “void.”
They try many things that they think they’ll enjoy!

Rather than having God’s word to obey and live by.
They choose the kind of life that they will die by!

Drugs, sex and violence of many perverted kinds.
Are what is now filling so many young people’s minds!

Read the headlines!  Many young people are stressed out!
Yet our government can’t seem to figure it out!

Another shooting…  Another act of violence appears!
While any kind of answer seems to have disappeared!

The answer is not more money to solve their problem!
No matter how much the government tries to solve them!

Let me give you answer.  It’s called “read the Bible 101!”
It’s time to repent to God the father, the spirit and the son!

Our young people need God brought back into their life!
And allow him to heal their brokenness and strife!

Jesus Christ is the solution for which many are asking!
Only he can give anyone a life that’s everlasting!

Please come Lord Jesus!  And heal the wounded hearts!
It’s everyone one of us, that it needs to start!

No court or school can separate God’s love for you and me!
Where will you spend your eternity?

By Jim Pemberton   10/24/13


Details | Verse | |

Home of the Slaves

Land of the free
Home of the slaves
The blood, sweat and tears of my ancestors resonate
Amongst the soil where they were slain
I’m hearing their struggle
I’m feeling their pain
I can’t imagine being forced to part from my family
All for massa’s gain
So I pay homage to those who promoted change

People like every slave who tried to escape
Nat Turner, Ms Carlotta, Harriet Tubman
And the safe houses who were in accord
And peg leg Joe with his song
Follow the drinking gourd.

People like, the disregarded - those thrown overboard
And who was dismissed and defamed
The ones who were stripped of their soul, their pride, their names

The list could go on  
The full will never be told
So I pay homage to others who were bold
Like John Brown, The Freedom Riders, Sojourner Truth
Ida B Wells, Phyllis Wheatley, Maya Angelou, 
Langston Hughes and Charles Drew

George Washington Carver, Ruby Bridges
Booker T Washington and Mary McCleod Bethune
Charles Houston, Ralph Bunche, Fredrick Douglass
WEB Dubois, Paul Robeson, Ralph Abernathy
Benjamin Banneker, Marcus Garvey and Crispus Attucks
Who’s death by the way
Symbolized the American lie
You cant declare the rights of all men
While the people of African decent rights get denied
But still we rise

Thanks to Dr Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, 
The Black Panthers, the Buffalo Soldiers and Tuskegee Airmen
None who were showed any love
Yeah it’s an uphill battle, 
But obviously greatness can be done.

We can rise above this stigma 
That blacks are lazy and daunting
That our worth is null and void 
And in essence minus nothing
And of all the names mentioned 
And the greatness of their successes
No one has been able to erase the evil transgressions of a racist mind
And once you have experienced just a taste of it
It changes your perception of time
The oppression beats like the drum on the chariot
Of when it was finally time to escape to freedom
It's mine


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

IN YOUR BLUE EYES

         IN YOUR BLUE EYES
You speak to me in tones of black and gray
and I give in to what your blue eyes say
your pictures tell it all, I have to cry
and die the death that's with me night and day.

I reach into the deepest part of you
and lose my soul there in your eyes so blue
not caring that I'm lost or even why
but only that my dreams are coming true.

You bring me peace then tear my world apart
destroying all I've been right from the start
there in your blue eyes I am glad to die
and go there in your blue eyes to your heart.


Details | Rhyme | |

Black and White

You’ve maddened me to the core 
You singed me with your ferocious fire
We’re opposites… we’ll never integrate  
We can’t blend with each other…
Your love and I’m hate 
We’re contrary to each other…

So don’t even think about 
Getting us back together 
Because without a doubt, 
We don’t click with each other…

So let us go our own way…

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to be deleted from my mind…

I’m not the one that should pay the price
You act as if you’re an angel from heaven
But, you’re a fiend…a devil from hell...who needs your advice?
Could someone unchain me from this prison?

So let us prepare for that day…

Fear and bewilderment build inside of our minds
Taking over us…we’re wasting valuable time
Terror and wrath injects into our veins…time starts to unwind 
I’m regaining my glory…this moment feels so sublime  

You think you’re innocent?
I can sense your guilt…bleeding through you
Do you live to feed me anguish? 
Don’t deny it…you crafty demon…no wonder I feel blue

Let’s get ready for battle…
I’ll watch you decay…
IT’S PAY BACK TIME . . .
Taste my fury and my agony 

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to be defeated…

I scream before nightfall
I close my eyes to kiss my demise
I want to disappear 
Scratch away my desolation
Wipe away my tears…
Spewing out of my eyes…like a waterfall
Tonight, there will be dismay
There will be suffering 
After sundown…
Failure and glory will expose like stars in the midnight sky
Who will earn the crown? 
No one knows in silent wars – who can reveal the light in goodbye
  
Why are we black and white?
Are you too afraid to know the reason why? 

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to suffer alone…


Details | Rhyme | |

Our Country's Soul Is Being Torn Apart


Our Country’s Soul Is Being “Torn Apart”

The very soul of America is being “torn apart.”
It’s a problem that’s striking at our very heart.

There’s a “blowing wind.”  A “time for change.”
As the country’s moral fabric is being “rearranged.”

As many question what the true meaning of life is for…
Many don’t seem to know what’s wrong or right anymore!

As so much pornography is allowed into our homes…
The moral decay is “eating” right at “the bones.”

Many have a hard time “defining what marriage is.”
So many are really “messed up” in how they live!

The news seems to be “fascinated” by man’s depravity…
Leaving a huge vacuum of a monstrous “moral cavity.”

Many who attend church want what’s
 “soothing to their ears.”
A God of holiness and righteousness
 is what they “fear!”

As we look around as to what our society is becoming…
God’s judgement is soon!  It is surely coming!

We must come back and leave all of our “false idols!”
We must come back to the God of the Bible!

Jesus must be our cord of love the forever binds!
It’s only in him can we find true love for our minds!

It’s only in Jesus that we can find a purpose and meaning!
It’s only in him that we need to put our
 trust and start believing!

He is and always will be the right choice to be taken…
Without him, our country’s is “doomed and forsaken.”

He brings healing and righteousness
“beneath his wings…
He is what we truly need!  
He is our EVERYTHING!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Italian Sonnet | |

Are you the one

Are you the one?

In time gone by we where as one
As my lonely heart does cry
For understanding what has changed I can only try
The days together in the sun
Now alas, is it all undone?
It’s only you I will stand by
As my faults you do decry
Yet the heart stays fast, not to run


What’s past is dead and gone my love
It’s forward we should move
The future is bright as shining snow
Let it take flight as the mourning dove
I pray you’ll never disapprove
Of the love I’m trying to bestow 


Details | Free verse | |

'Twisted Reality'



"life can be warped into new beginnings, when you least expect it"

somber and dark the mood 
embracing the abyss of his thoughts 

twisted images of reality 
engrossed in truth 
lurking beyond the light 

afraid –
reality seems too dark 
maybe the light is the other way 

too far to turn back 
no crossroads in sight 

"stick with what you know" the voice said 

what if I don't know anything? 
where to now? 
lurking beyond the light 

afraid 
always 
afraid 

everything so twisted 
emotions, 
life, 
even his heart... 

twisted images of reality 
engrossed in truth

Contest Name: A Poem, Please
By: Wilma N. Neels
100820111135


Details | Free verse | |

Like a thief in the night -Thinking of September 11th

Another morning I got up and my thoughts returned here. Just wanted to put something of
the memory that lingers still today from scenes we saw of September 11th.  Scenes we would
like to but will never and should never forget.  I do not wish to cause further despair to
anyone but if anything bring some hope to those who are suffering safe in the knowledge
that they have the world behind them.  What has happened cannot be undone but with
strength and assistance from those who had the core torn from them as the horrors unfolded
and they watched on in disbelief we can be there for one another.  We can make sure the
memory of this tragic affair lives on, and in doing so help keep our own souls alive and
kicking... in hope all was not in vain, but that we shall learn from it and let the
promise of peace win through.  My heart and thoughts go out to all.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It doesn't matter today
if we build a building of immense height
like North and South towers of World Trade Centre
even if to use as defence system
just as we would have built a castle on a hill
in times gone by - times have changed
New buildings and memorials will now stand
in recognition of who/what was on said land
Their memories will always continue
as will the vision on t.v. all did view
Where minds stood still in disbelief
while strike after strike we all felt grief
Where tears were shed by billions of eyes
War was declared with no defence in skies

It doesn't matter today
we most probably wouldn't even see
as our enemies approached
Like a thief in the night they came
stealing from us that most precious
those whom we loved or cared about

What matters today
is that for all eternity history has been made
Times we cannot change
Broken genealogical lines gone forever
Marks made on the landscape - irreplaceable
Never can anything stand for what was again
Humanity and psychological effect remains
We may not all have lost those known to us
but we stand together shoulder to shoulder
Encircling those that remain
Knowing each one of us had our soul torn
Our eyes darkened by Hells darkest Angels
When none could believe that before their eyes
Planes came crashing through the skies

Out of ashes a phoenix, a nation arises
and with it the world reawakens
We will not sleep but remember
A tragic time when so high a cost was paid
with unknowing souls now recognised
What right to take such brave innocent lives


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Our Invincible Defeat

The inner and the outer,
Are dissolving fast in space.
The ominous clouds of thunder,
Are covering your face.

The meek the mild and innocent,
Are trampled under feet,
As we go one marching blindly,
To our invincible defeat.

No more calling softly,
No more calling you,
We've lost our hope and loving,
What once we thought was true.

And now the choice is coming,
Riding on a wave,
To be a free man dying,
Or be a mad man's slave.

And now the drums are drumming,
Drumming down the line,
Will you be marching forwards?
Will you be deaf and blind?

Will the light of sacred meaning?
Shine from bottom of your heart?
As the soldiers go on marching,
Tearing our humanity apart.

more at http://labyrinthoflies.com


Details | Blank verse | |

Yumitripela

whenever I see you
i’m thinking of him

i greet you
you greet me
we talk and
we talk and
we talk
we are silent because
we are thinking of him
we are silent

so long ago it is
almost forgotten
i think it is ten years
you say it is twenty
we both have forgotten
for that is much better
it soon will be thirty
we keep on forgetting

it was on a day
that was much like today
it was grey
it was cloudy
no blue in the skies
but neither did rain fall
and to our surprise we saw
specks of a rainbow
we searched and we found it
the hole in the clouds

i know not the season
because it was cloudy
it felt like the winter
when snow had all melted
but also like summer
when sunshine was missing
and we were together
together with him

i still do recall that
it was on the third
but i know not the month
and i know not the year
or the day of the week
but whenever i see
number three written down
i am thinking of you
i am thinking of him
i still do recall
how that day did begin 
when it all felt exciting
for we were together
together with him

our lives seemed so splendid
our lives seemed so good and
our lives seemed eternal
for you and for me
and especially for him

we three went out strolling
although it was freezing
but it was not raining
so we went out strolling
together with him

one  question keeps nagging us
who is to blame for this
this could be  my fault
or this could be your fault
or this could be his fault
yes this could be his fault
we did it together
yes i did it
you did it
he did it too

they asked us what happened
but we just kept silent
they asked and they asked us
but i just kept silent
and you just kept silent
yes we both kept silent
too long and too guilty
we found not the words
not for me
not for you
not for him

we’re now linked together
forever connected

forever connected
with you and with him

whenever I see you
i’m thinking of him


Details | Limerick | |

Pickles And Tickles FAST Food.

We cook it ! Feel your tonsils tingle!
Add mayonnaise, lettuce, a pickle.
Lost both tonsils at ten
so can I ask you when
my change comes to more than a nickle?


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To a Dead Man

You Drive me into this Malice, into this Maze I can only see the last of days Your Creation Failed With Me Burn with malice as you bridge to the plains of ennui


Details | Rhyme | |

The Pencil Sharpener

I, the sleeper and dreamer
Wish for your end
Is it wrong, blasphemer?
Should I break, should you bend?

I sharpen your demise on a pencil sharpener
Peeling you away….reaching your core of lead
Should I break or should you bend?
Or can’t I just wish for my end?

There’s knives protruding from your eyes
The eyes I know are dead
The blasphemer you are will reveal where your body lies
Beneath your core of lead

I found you among the disposables
Wishing for my end
I blasphemed you and you just gave back
My pencils burning with lead

I screamed as you pierced through me
I felt it in my soul!
But I’m to blame for this masterpiece
I sharpened you with gold!

The shavings fall upon the ground
And still this dream moves on
Pierced, I fall without a sound
Until the break of dawn

I, the sleeper and dreamer 
Am still pierced to this day
So I hand the pencil sharpener to you
And pray you’ll be with me 


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

SOMETHING FOR TODAY

     SOMETHING FOR TODAY
The morning lights and to another day
a pirate's chest you've found but will not stay
for longer than the blinking of your eye
from troubled sleep to wake wherein you die

through every ticking second where you are
as dense and far away as any star
you sit and let your life and time run out
and have become what others talk about

from time to time you'll always hear a clue
between each word that's meant for only you
coincidental to what you have seen
you take it in as what each word must mean

and this will guide you through the whole day long
as certain as the hearing of Our Song
just at the proper timing of your need
and then your thought will soar, it has been freed

you cling to it and make it what must be
the fabric of your life and prophesy
and it will carry you from here to there
into another day that goes no where.
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa


Details | Narrative | |

A Soul Awakened

The warm light calls me
And all the people who cries for thee
I raise my hand in this abyss
Only to make one wish
To float among the others
With all my sisters and brothers
I call out for forgiveness with passion
I take their pain into myself for this occasion
The moment that I see the sky
I will not look back and cry
My body is laying still
People standing by it with a chill
The air gets dense with sadness
I would not think of it less
Some people look up and down
To see the light hit the ground
Some can vision the uplifting feeling they see
One soul that has been and always be
It is special to notice such aberration 
And that might be how souls are awaken


Details | Rhyme | |

The Bully Part 1

The Bully

27 Years ago, you showed me the door,
Because I wouldn’t do what you wanted anymore.
That day was the worst of my life,
I wanted to die, to escape the strife.
All I needed was a simple letter,
To give me a chance to get better.
Now when I look back and see, you certainly did
 me a favour that day.
In 1986 Thursday the first of May.
From then on people listened to what I had to say,
Doctors and Nurses went out or their way,
I got the treatment I needed at last,
Bit by bit they went over the past.
One whole year is all it took,
A lot of hard work, a little luck.
To this very day I have never been back,
26 whole years and that’s a fact.
The last few years have been the best of my life,
Truly content being a Mother and Wife.
And Nanny as well,
Must not let my head swell,
A collection of poems all written by me..
My story in 7 magazines for the whole world to see.
A whole new extension to the house designed by me.
Also having to cope with the death of my mother,
Then four months later the death of my mother’s sister,
God not another.
Having my kitchen demolished completely,
did put me in a fix.
But being so well, even that couldn’t knock me for six.
So remember the next time someone begs you for a letter,
At least give THEM, the chance to get better.
For as long as I live I will never for get that terrible day,
Thursday 1986 the first of May,
The day that you showed me the door,
Just because I wouldn’t do what you wanted anymore.
They say that time heals all pain,

I’m lucky I’ve learnt to live again.







Details | Light Poetry | |

Running Away

Packing bags and leaving home 

Running into the darkness of 
night like a criminal

No destination

Just an escape into freedom 
from the nightmare

Just feeling the sunlight’s breath 
on my cheek freely

A winds whisper touching my 
ears

Running away from dreams and 
wishes

Setting an adventure of a 
lifetime

Running away from the past 
where horror lies

Running away from lullabies and 
thunder

Forgetting everything for awhile 

And sit down and breathe in and 
out for awhile

Smelling the freshness of life 
that will no longer exist


Details | Rhyme | |

Living A Lifestyle That the Bible Forbids

Living A Lifestyle That the Bible Forbids…

I know of someone living a lifestyle that the Bible forbids.
He told me; “how dare anyone tell me how I should live!”

He added; “what I do is no one else’s business but my own.”
“No one can ever tell me what I do in my home!”

When given scripture that clearly forbids what he’s doing…
It’s the backward kind of life… That he’s choosing!

He claims Jesus is his lord, in spite of his moral depravity.
It’s like he has, in his body, an “infected cavity.”

God gave to us his word, with his holy instructions!
If we don’t obey, it’ll lead to our spiritual destruction!

It doesn’t matter if 10,000 churches say that it’s o.k. to do!
God requires a righteous and holy way of living, for me and YOU!

There are choices we all have, that are to be made!
Are you going to be victorious in Christ?  Or sin’s slave???

Have you thought about living for Jesus?  And what it cost?
If we’re not sacrificing our lives for him, we’re forever lost!

If you’re one who’s caught up into a life filled with perversion…
May I introduce you to the blood of Jesus?  And a righteous conversion?

God gave to each of us, HIS rules and commandments to live by!
It’s either God’s rules, or man’s, that you’ll either live or die by!

Won’t you choose a life that God has chosen to give you?
He created mankind!  It’s no secret how much he loves you!

The opportunity is here!  It may never come again!
Won’t you let the power of Jesus break the bondage of sin?

Jesus can set you free!   Won’t you let him help you?
He’s patiently waiting…   Just because he wants to!

By Jim Pemberton   10/07/13


Details | Ballad | |

The Song of the Loner

Cut out from the rest, feeling so left out I lay my head on my hands and sigh: Why did things have to happen this way Why is it that I was denied? Denied the basic friendship, A meager ounce of which could help, To grow in thought, deed, word and spirit, To help strengthen myself. Why is it that I feel the need, To sit in the corner and cry? The cold creeps in and I’m overcome By the darkness and void of the night. I lift my head and open my eyes, The tears they blur my sight, And through hazed vision I notice a single star, A lone beacon in the sky. The clouds they part and a million other stars Come out from hidden slumber; They join with that single star to make The glow in the night sky brighter. Combined with the light of the great white moon, They light up the earth below. Their twinkle and their glimmer reflects on the pool, Of tears lying on the floor. Suddenly the truth hits me: My life was playing right before me! I realize that soon the time would come When I would not be lonely. That there would come a day when I wouldn’t have to weep In self pity and dismay; That the clouds of hate and bitterness Would one day roll away. That the love and friendship I duly deserve Would fall like summer rain Refreshing my soul and replenishing my spirit Making me whole again. Yet till that day I have to wait And learn to shine on my own. So for now I stand up and wipe away my tears; My spirit no longer forlorn.


Details | Lyric | |

Lacerated Wings

They are bound to the Earth like trees
Suffocating under the weight of an icy grave 
Reaching to be free, but only their limbs are seen
Hoping that one day someone will see:
They can't escape with lacerated wings

The ocean surrounds me, covering everything
Nothing will be clearly seen; confusion overwhelming
No-one can save you, you're on your own, left to die
Manipulating every bleeding heart you can find
I can't escape with lacerated wings.

Swarms of nets, waves of screams 
Entangle: your captive illusions and dreams
The mask has be seared - The truth now they see
The Liar - Vampiric Fiend; lowly thief
And now they know you can't escape with Lacerated Wings

There's reasons for your rejections:
Your Heavy heart's transferred oppression
The scars are too deep to pass the trials
But you can find peace in your cage of empty spirals
You Cannot Escape With Lacerated Wings


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To a Bride Without a Name

Oh Flora, Choral Beauty The Sun Rises With You Out of An Abyss of Chaos, Yet No Piece of Beauty Is Lost I Can't Grant You Nobility, But Our Love's Vitality Will Last Till The Gates of Hades's Halls They Will Push, They Will Pull, And Their Power Will Grow Just To Have A Piece of Our Love's Immortality For It They Cannot Wait Subdued By Desperation's Phantom But I Will Always Be One of Them So, My Dear, Please Understand I'm Just A Chevalier Drenched With My Sins The Hope Will Fade The Rose Will Turn Black The Promise Was Just I Lie, Though I Forbade I Will Just Be Another Empty Heart, Slain By Your Loosening Grip On My Sanity I Will Die, You Will Be Free Believe - It's The Way Things Must Be My Dear, Just Understand


Details | Rhyme | |

Longing for Peace

What is this weight, upon my chest I feel?
Is it worries trapped inside my mind, or is it real

I gasp for air, but feel that there is nothing left for me
The weight I feel upon my chest I can not touch or see

It feels of heavy burden, painful loss and memories
As if I’m sitting in a boat alone in darkened seas

Surrounded by the darkness, and the air is thick and tight
I feel as if I’m standing still, though I row with all my might

I pray for God to clear the air, and show me that there’s light
But this prayer, has gone unheard, and my heart is full of fright

What do I do, where do I turn, there is no help for me
This is something I must endure, be brave until I’m free

The pain I feel, it just gets worse, and I feel I can not stand
What should I do, I try to move, but it’s as if I’m in quick sand

My mind has lost all reason; it’s as if there’s nothing there
My heart feels all the pressure, and it’s more than it can bear

I’m trapped inside a darkened space, that’s full of worry and despair
I’m weighed down with all my thoughts, and I don’t really want to share

I know that this is something that I will get through one day
But until then I’m trapped inside this mind so far away.


Details | Sonnet | |

Sonnet Dialogue: Scorn in Duality, Lit Op 5

I
I  looked below and saw the dawn from here,
Disturbing may, below the light- a man.

II
“Oh, stranger most, shall I ask you with fear?”

III
“Dear one, you fear no one”, replied the man,
“Nor Him, you fear Him not for you are but
The holder of the strings of those you sight.”

IV
A second by, I asked him in abrupt,
“The guardians of the roof, had they loved me?”

V
He voiced: “Their love are drawn in stitching crossed,
Exquisite yet details are course, you see?
The veil from where it rests you should have tossed,
Each thread in havoc, one chaotic sea!”

VI
I spared a tear, his face did went outworn,
Afar the lake I headed. God, I’m torn!

-oOo-


Details | Ballad | |

The Forgotten Ones

Forgotten somewhere in the midst of steel and concrete. 
Bound by shackles and chains even in our sleep. 
Living like wolves preying amongst lost sheep. 
Concrete tears and pains so mindfully deep. 

Forgotten by those on the outside. 
We cant even run no where, we cant even hide. 
No choice left but to sit and fight. 
In here only the strong minded survive. 
Truth be told in here what is wrong is right. 

All most os us got is wasted M&^*&F*^&&ng time. 
We sit back and work out and write heartfelt rhymes. 
Not to be a victim of prey we all trying. 
Many stories are told, songs are written of truth over lying. 

We are gone for the moment but not truly forgotten so the hurt we must not show it.
 We are to old while we young to be crying in front of full grown men for this is a time we must out grow it.
 There aint no way out this hell hole and we all know it. 
Feelings of hopelessness surrounds te heart to the point where we can no longer control it.
 
In here there is only time no fun. 
Darkness fills night no light shone in here from the sun. 
Only by our own selves we may be out done. 
BECAUSE IN HERE IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE TRULY THE FORGOTTEN ONES....


Details | Ballad | |

With This New Day

I have lived, 
And felt the cost, 
Paid my dues, 
But I have lost_ You. 


 Still I pray, 
As chaos looms, 
And as my blue turns into grey, 
I hear__ 
The angels sing- In tune. 

 Don't be giving in, 
Don't give up my son, 
Or fade away, 
Lift your chin with the sun__ And rise, 
With this new day!. 

 I have lived, 
And felt the cost of all my wonderin ways, 
I've paid my dues, 
I - Have lost you. 


 I can hear the angels sing, 
Your in a mistaken land__ Lessons learned in truth, 
As the grey seeks out the blue, 
She will__ Your daughter my son--- 
She will return--- To You.

For I have lived, 
Felt the cost of all my walkin days, 
I've paid my dues, 
I- Lost you....


I wont be giving in, 
Won't give up my girl, 
Or fade away, 
I'll lift my chin with the sun--- 
And RISE-- 
With this new day...


Details | I do not know? | |

On Human Responsibility in a Chaotic World

I hear it,
Like the many lights flashing
 just to keep me going.
Contrary to  the damp twisted sheets 
as my anchor to 
the warm drip.

On my invisible brow 
I have been spat 
 
And I am not counting

Now,
Theres always an echo of an army
poised in the dark
between finishing and pointlessness
Sometimes gumming Orchid petals and clicking wooden heels
over and over.

For the first time today I remembered there was something outside 
of me. 
I heard a resonating moan.
Nothing like air nor flesh 
but many strong puzzle pieces 
spinnging and catching 
to simply and suprisingly 
keep going
 forward.


Details | Kyrielle | |

Raven's End

I know that taking my life is a sin,
But you don’t know how much pain I am in;
Death is better than this hell I’ve been through,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

My tortured soul robs me of breath,
All I seek is the release of death;
Requesting redemption in the gun I cling to,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

I’m considering briefly the life I must end,
Nothing is left but the chance to transcend;
And this decaying body that I pass through,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

Raven they named me, but now they are gone,
I’m all alone since they both passed on;
Soon I will see them, it’s long overdue,
God grant me mercy for what I must do;

I beg for forgiveness as I let myself go,
Tears trickle down as I feel my heart slow;
Hopefully now I’ll get to see you,
So God grant me mercy for what I must do.


Tirzah Conway
~For the contest "Among the Dead"~


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

THE BETRAYAL

     THE BETRAYAL
 Absconded from the scene, but dying fast,
 to seek a vengeance in a candle flame,
 I whisper names as prayers, a spell is cast,
 and goes about its deed--this is no game.

 The power none believe is really there;
 (or speak of, tongue in cheek, at very best)
 too soon is born and takes me everywhere,
 to ride the devil's beast upon my quest,

 and have no mercy, it will drive you mad,
 as you have done to me within my past,
 and just as soon, you'll lose the mind you've had,
 to whimper in the dark. The spell is cast.

 Breathe slowly now, and know this is your end,
 where once was written, you were safe and sane; 
 that on the day when you betrayed this friend--
 --your life has come to be eternal pain.
          ©  ron wilson (aka Vee Bdosa the Doylestown Poet)


Details | Couplet | |

The Heart's Yearning

From an early age she yearned for something great
What it was she did not know, but she really couldn’t wait

For many interests she had, both large and small
Her love of animals and great friendships, she grew with them all

An insecure father who controlled all around
Was mitigated by mom until she was ground down

All added to the general confusion we experience early in life
But our values and strength of character help us with strife

That we continuously face over our time on this earth
Which produces some grit and grime that impedes our search

For that pinnacle of happiness, whatever it is
The finding for some is like taking a quiz

On subjects we don’t quite understand
With no guarantee to reach that promised of lands

Of joy, contentment, bliss, all words that describe 
Whatever we believe is that ultimate ride

Her journey is similar to many of us
It’s good times and bad that cause a great fuss

Her strengths are vision and commitment to move towards a goal
Not letting “reality”, pain, or confusion take too great a toll

Understanding that it isn’t just reaching the end
But enjoying the journey and making sure you ascend

To that place of places we all want to be
Our true heart’s yearning, I think you’ll agree

For her specifically, that is to say for my wife
She’s given me all that I wanted in life

A great family including kids, dogs, cats, horses, and then some
And encouragement to go after a calling that was right under my thumb

She’s a great friend, and remarkably so
That I want her to have that additional glow 

That comes from achieving her ultimate heart’s yearning
Making something out of nothing, using passion and life’s learning.


Details | Acrostic | |

The Message

I'm not the greatest of all-times, but when I'm done, I'll be an all time great in this lifetime of mine Like the late great who came before my time I will breed a new lifeline, that will breathe life like march of dimes My story lines, will bring truth life; like troops who fight Overseas, for rights of those who believe that death is life Now that ain't right! As the rich is getting richer, eating fillet me-non, while we barely feeding our appetite Night after night Survival has waged a war that gave us no choice but to battle and fight Although, we'll be all right They say we a dying breed, but that ain't right Instead we're the light to a lying greed That will enlighten life to a brand new seed A man of God indeed Freed from the Son that bleeds Like the summer breeze He's the sum that equals the amount of air I breathe The air that please A satisfaction like the birds and the bees My word's words are the keys That will fornicate with the mind and give birth to a seed A seed of social change, that'll change our social economy So shall our comradery That will bring comfort to a struggling society A synonym...similar to a civilization seeking for unity Unifying the physics of theory That seeks to explain the synopsis of a dying philosophy Similar to the Cosby X-cept my scrip-tic will speak more about our reality Like life's calamity And everything else in life that's destroying us systematically However, I've discovered a system That can mathematically destroy ignorancy And turn our state of mind intellectually I elect that He (God) selects me to be And be that man who may lead this community So that they (My Peoples) may commute with me En-route to a destination, destine towards our destiny Like we were destine to be We were meant to be "Great" like the late great that came before we. Because we are... The reflection where perfection gave birth to the definition of greatness Where great means Competent, Skilled, Well Informed, and Tremendous Our potentials are endless And only we not even the enemy can put an end to this So it's time we put a stop to this The biggest enemy of self And that's envy and jelousness Cause after this is Heaven or Hell and that's all there is A promised made sealed with a kiss Knowing this Is the next best thing since "In the beginning" In the first chapter of the first verse in Genesis!


Details | Rhyme | |

Why Do We Preach Tolerance and Love


Tolerance and love is preached…  But,  at what price?
Too often we forget about Jesus’ sacrifice!

His death was because our sin counted against us.
He died on the cross because he truly loves us!

How dare we “cheapen” his work on the cross!
In today’s “political correctness..”  We have lost!

In the love and acceptance, we call it “inclusion.”
This has led many into a serious “confusion.”

Many want the loving side of God.  I can’t blame them!
But those who seek his holiness…  
Can you name them?

God is a God of love.  But he requires holy living too!
This is not a request but a command 
me and you!

If it’s tolerance and love you want…  Look no more!
You’ll be able to find it washed up on sin’s shore!

The people of Israel wanted “free love.” 
 Look what it got them!
Being slaves and captives, is what
 it taught them!

God is a loving God but is also as a consuming fire!
Living a righteous life is what he really desires!

“Without holiness…  No man shall see him.”
That’s why he sent Jesus, to the world beneath him!

Won’t you allow your sins to be totally forgiven?
Only Jesus can change the way
 you’ve been livin’!

He gives eternal life to those who
 diligently seek him!
The choice is yours to repent and receive him!

By Jim Pemberton    


Details | Rhyme | |

4:20, Four- Twenty, The Earth Day Birthday

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION


Details | Rhyme | |

Man's Corruption God's Redemption

Man's Corruption...  God's Redemption!

The Bible speaks of man's sin and corruption.
That's why God has offered us, his redemption!

The heart is desperately wicked above all things.
There's an evil corruption that sin brings!

The Lord searches our heart and tests our ways.
He watches our lives, all of our days!

There's nothing good in ourselves.
Not now, or ever!
Without God's mercy...
We're doomed forever!

But, through Christ, there's a way and a plan!
He made this available to every woman and man!

His gift of salvation is a message of love, made clear!
The coming of Jesus Christ,
 draws ever so near!

We can trade our sinful corruption, 
for a new way of living!
Won't you come before the Lord,
with a heart of giving?

Giving our life to Jesus,
 is the best thing to do!
By his power and grace, you can be
made BRAND NEW!

I'm thankful for his salvation! 
 Mercy has been applied!
Because of Christ' death on the cross…
I'm now sanctified!

By Jim Pemberton   


Details | Quintain (English) | |

Mother, Middle Aged

Mother, Middle Aged.


Forlorn, she sinks into the abyss of a middle aged
mother,  her pupae no longer the apple of her eye.
Baffled, she sees her cocoon torn open and barged 
hastily, fumbling in quest of sham grown ups’ pride.
A mother she remains, middle aged. Spiteful and void.


Details | Rhyme | |

Jesus I Welcome You As My Guest


Jesus,…  I welcome you as my “invited guest.”
Things inside me have been “a big mess!”

I ask you to come in and take 
complete control.
May you be the lord of my body,
 mind and soul!

May you be the focal of my 
thoughts and attention!
I need your words for
 inspiration and direction!

I need our comfort when I feel 
discomfort and pain...
I’m so glad you’re here!  
And am glad you came!

You are and will always be the God for me!
You’ve broken my chains! Now I am free!

I thank and bless you for all that will do…
You were there when I had no one else to turn to!

Thanks again for accepting my invitation.
You’ve cleansed my life! 
 I’m a “new creation!”

You’ve given me your peace and joy throughout!
Living for YOU is what 
life is all about!

You’ve given me your love 
and joy throughout!
Living for YOU is what 
 life is all about!

By Jim Pemberton     03/09/12


Details | List | |

Just a load of cliches

I once lived in a notebook but now I live in your head with your dreams.

And I scheme.

He was warmed to the truth by tea and intoxicatologigated by me

I see!

I am right round the corner from him.You might say,we are at right angled cross purposes

Is there a  cross surplus?.

As all set out,storms set in,then we all fell out if you see what I dream.

I   am mean

You are as truthful as as a chorus of wrongs in rites of the Church choir

Don't leave me in the lurch.I'm a liar.

He’s as tense as a mournful frog in a bog in Ireland in wintery discontentll

It's all meant

As far as the wife can throw,I flew.

I shall  sue Sue.

I was flooded as a whole.My emotions welled up and ran all over me like faries’ hands..

Like elastic bands

I am honest as the day is wrong.

Give me a song

He was torn in three by tomcats with balls of steel

They will appeal

I have lost a whole stone and still no moss will grow on me.It grew on the stone!

Now I feel so alone

As Gluck would have it, music is heavenly singing by invisible choirs of cats.

He was bats

I sought him here,I sought him there.I sought him with angelic flair.

But noone catches Tony Blair.

I am as snug as a lapdog in a bog with a brick on its head

Can I sleep on your bed?

She was as tender as an apple tart is round.

 and quite sound

As the crow flew,I had to fly as well to avoid it escaping me..I leave no crow alone

They usually get stoned


Details | Cinquain | |

Lost Soul

Someone,
So far from home,
Wondering why he's here,
Just another face in the crowd,
No one.


Details | Shape | |

Lost

into darkness 
this life descends 
mired at death's door 
as its light steadily dims
these aweary bleached bones 
doth mourn once youthful days
when innocence pure o'er this soul
in blissful ignorance happily reigned
before time's ephemeral passing breath   
enshrouded this woebegone heart's moody
mangled reprobate impenitent suasible flesh
with ne'er a humble outcry nor ire forbearance
this lingering bemired e'er obstinate human clay 
whence forth engenders hope's demise since afore 
existence's perfect birth beyond its motherly womb   
till sufferings' midlife malefic spirits furtively abort 
its righteous life-giving journey heavenward bound 
an inward promise greedily denied by passion's fire
mere dust in blackness of darkness wholly effaced
from paradise lost to limbo's nonexistent embrace
this inflexible cursed soul henceforth forgotten
a preemie spirit resident to fields of silence

© Eugene Harvey


Details | Epic | |

Crossroads

Walking threw the mist of the night,
on the path that lead deep into the forest, in absence of sound;
from one whom was bought, no body shell be found,
of those who might be lost, homeward bound,
as we raven through this hollow ground.

Cross sentences that are incomplete, fractions that make you weak,
threw words that you learned so well, life is a living hell,
don't front and pull back, end of line, number check,
in the story and on track, blank page,
ink intact.


Details | Free verse | |

Follow that rainbow

Life is possibility
there are broad horizons out there for us all if only we will look 
If children don’t succeed they try again or try something else – 
life is about finding who we are, what our purpose is, and where our talents lay… 
Just because we are not happy with something now 
does not mean tomorrow will not bring brighter horizons

Get out and follow the rainbow of opportunity
its spectrum of options are numerous in number and variety
Look top your heart and minds desires and work with it
A potter will work with a piece of clay, take it and mold it
Squash it, slip it, turn - carve - colour - glaze and cook it
In attempt to master the minds perfection

We do not always get it right
but there is little that cannot be scrapped and redone
before too far down the path and then re-do
There is nothing to say if we become lost to our first desires
that in looking for others we shall not find where we should be at
or what it is we should be doing

Too many of yester-years children have grown up 
to thinking they have no place within our society
they have become lost to lack of jobs
they are skilled and talented in own direction
as humans they bring chance to our world with new skills
those that are being lost through continual rejection

Each of us has personal pot of gold to find
not always is this financial but one that makes us feel needed
Each of us should be encouraging 
so many live miles from home families divided miles apart
Community is individuality here and yet we need pull back together
for in doing so we will know each others needs to support

When the efforts of others become unrecognised
We can lose that which is vital to having the skills needed
for tomorrow or future years
Pulling together now and offering needed skills to fit in
An hour or two’s experience in an alternatve can keep us in touch with one another
I was always taught that none of us know what will happen to us in years ahead
Sowing seeds now could help us grow or keep us going then

Think twice because times are changing
Those latter years of our lives could perhaps see us working retirements
With those we helped along the way over us instead
Teach them what you know and they’ll remember
Maybe helping you in your struggles or perhaps retraining
Karma comes around as it goes around, make yours good!


Details | Rhyme | |

Call Into The Night

Sometimes death it calls to me, like a welcomed beckon in the night.
A way to end all the miserery, a way to escape this stress and freight.
But of this call I do not answer, I can not meet death at its door.
The pain it would bring to all those I love, this is a pain I can not give,
This is a promise that I swore!


Details | Free verse | |

Glisten in the Moonlight

Your glorious emerald eyes 
Glisten in the moonlight 
Glisten in the moonlight 
Delight dances in the water
I watch it joyfully
You are set free from the cage...
You're like a dove soaring in the sky
You are the rain...
drizzling down in ecstasy 
A hint of ecstasy is shown in your reflection...
When you caress me... I'm relieved... 
From the stress that forced me in chains
I knew we'd be on the brighter side of tomorrow 
We're glistening in the moonlight 
I knew we'd become candles in the heavens above us
We're glistening in the moonlight
For a moment, I felt your presence...your radiant with sympathy 
I saw at first glance the dark side of you
Tonight, we'll be together and fly through the horizon 
We'll watch the sunset say its last goodbye...
We'll wave a greeting at the moon! 
We glisten in the moonlight...
What if I was as handsome as the lion...
Roaring with pride and pure courage
What if we were glistening in the moonlight?
Would it bring health to our bones tonight?
Would it make our heart rejoice and overflow with delight?
Would we be able to survive this horrifying plight?
Would we be shimmering like a candlelight?
We're glistening in the moonlight... (6)
Ohh...yeah...ooh yeah...ooh yeahh...
We reach to the stars and hope we can trace a shooting star
I feel the coolness run down my fingers...
We're glistening in the moonlight
You're the dandelions in the fields
You're the gorgeous view that I marvel at everyday
When you kiss me, I live my dreams
We glisten in the moonlight
In a quick moment, I sense a feeling of endless renewal 
I roam inside of your illuminating maze 
Glow on... sunshine... 
Glow on...sunshine...
Glisten in the moonlight...
Listen to the truth and rub it in
You are ravishing like the sunset
But you're ascending while I'm descending
I feel extremely guilty
I wish I could glisten with you in the moonlight
You're glistening in the moonlight (6) 
Ohhh yeahh... oohhh yeahh... ohh yeahh
You're glistening in the moonlight (4)
We go our own way
I wish we can glisten like the moon
Glisten like the sun 
There's a dream concealed inside of me...
Reveal your light and pour it upon me
You glisten in the appealing moonlight
While I'm subsiding... you're fulfilling your dreams
Of gliding across the horizon 
You're independence... keeps on scorching with satisfaction
While I'm below you... 
Your emerald green eyes
Stared me down like a hawk...
Your emerald eyes
Gaze down at me genuinely...
I wish we could flee together in reality...
That could be a possibility
To glisten in the moonlight in glee
We were glistening in the moonlight (3)
But that was only a dream...
I'll pray that it turns into a reality
We were glistening in the moonlight 
Now, I've misplaced my delight...
Will I ever experience such a brilliant night?


Details | Rhyme | |

Mercy Rewrote My LIfe


Mercy Rewrote My Life!

My life was rewritten by God’s mercy divine!
He took away my sins and cleansed my mind!

I was totally changed by his awesome power!
His word is renewing me each day and hour!

He reached out and touched me, 
when no one else could!
All of my burdens and problems...  
He understood!

He strengthens my body with his
 love and healing!
I wake up each day with a 
“brand new feeling!”

I thank the lord for everything he’s given!
I’m a new person and my sins are forgiven!

My life is rewritten.  The past is washed clean!
Christ is my righteousness! 
 My everything!

I’m so grateful for him and all that he’s done!
All glory and honor to God’s precious son!

The joy he’s given.  I’ll no longer hide!
Because of God’s mercy..  
I’m on the winning side!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

just breathing

        When life takes hold of you no mercy given  
        Foreclosures popular , the new age to walk ..driven
        When your nerves are shattered 
        The home you live in seems scattered 

           Just breathe ~

       children don't understand why you can't give money on the daily 
       life feels cold and The bills are unbearable to open it seems
       When there is not enough food in the pantry for all
       you feel you are losing as you begin to fall , loose sight of dreams 

            Just breathe ~

     All these things are a test , every breath that counts.
     It's the faith,  and will to live , as anxiety mounts
     In your darkest hour just call on his power  
     with the help of God above , you will surmount.
        
           just breathe ~ just keep breathing

      "  Just another day in paradise Contest "


Details | Narrative | |

Waves of Change

Waves of Change Changes in life descriptionalized In comparison to waves of the ocean Our bodies are made mostly of water A body of water with flowing emotions Now an ocean will flow peacefully Until there is a bit of turbulence Disrupting from a smooth flow With the up and down currents As we walk onto a new path A different kind of feeling steps in New ventures can be scary in thought Of what is left behind when we begin An air of difference can bring on a spin To a funnel effect as does a water spout Sometimes when in the spin motion cycle We are shaded by clouds and cannot see out When actually caught within the spin We do not see the change is there Our sense of direction is lost We become totally unaware If you are the one caught Within that fast paced spin You will not be able to see The shape you are really in That’s the time we need someone To give us a tap on the shoulder It’s not a matter of who knows more Or which one of the other is older You’ll need a friend like Dory was Saying to just keep swimming the sea To never give up your hopes and dreams As changes in life really just happen to be Florence McMillian (Flo)


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Living Out Loud

A good portion of the nation is living out loud

involuntarily, because of invasion of privacy,

Inquisitions prompted by religious affliliations

and racial discriminations,

Private living has become obsolete,

obliterated by accusations, and curiosities,

The American Dream no longer holds the 

same meaning for everyone,

Foreigners' lives are plastered on every news edition,

from the products they use, to the foods they eat,

Quiet lives are no longer discreet,

such indignities and inhumane treatments have become

the norm, because spies come in all sizes, shapes and forms,

When will all the mistrust and circumspection end?

Remember, Terrrorists don't lay down roots and pretend to

be friends........,

They are only committed to appearances and ends.




Details | Concrete | |

Trip Twist

In the void, sipping the zoid,
with mental properties of tripping on the spiral.
Falling down the tail of lions, awkwardly spinning.
With upside down tunnel vision leaking through.

Solidifying all matter that matters,
melting into the walls of your brain.
It tickles all the raindrops dripping in your eyes,
satisfying your desire of a synchronized pattern.

Bleeding purple from the rainbow,
and turning into swirls of diamonds.
Slipping exuberantly beside you; driving you wild.
Where the shadows stop the spirited scream.

Devour yourself into the omniscient grip. 
Icy cold finger tips scratch the surface of your divinity,
bringing you closer to the God who whispered in your unborn ear,
situated in your flesh from birth to death.

It embeds itself in the pupil of your eye,
dancing with your spirit and licking your soul.
Black shapes of madness wrapped in chaos and euphoria.
Twinkling and blinking dust of a cloud. 

Haze filled skies and blood filled smoke raining from the clouds.
Envisions of clowns and demons laughing at our demise.
Chilling sensations of sickening mannerisms,
mechanisms and mechanics sought out to destroy the tiny creatures.

These creatures running crazy into acceptance of demise.
Deprived of life, scared of death but giving into it's taste.
Taste buds quiver as the taste grows sweeter.
Death, oh death, tell everyone who you really are...

Too long have you been hidden in the shadows you cast, 
too long have we rendered your pain.
The world grows sicker as the hairs in my head grey. 
I'll never surrender as demons always circle.

Today, begins a new day of our fight.
And I have a good feeling about this day. 
Onward, we have united our minds and gathered ourselves within. 
Always ready for we accept our fear. 

We accept our hate and everything in between.
Accept it all for what it really is. 
No amount of doubts will over throw us. 
Onward, to peace.


Details | Narrative | |

My Story Telling Can You Trust Me

Gun fire all around, bombs going off in the distance
It was some of the angry mobs and resistance
Father was the king of SafeHaven a small kingdom
Like all other kingdoms it fell in random
Fire started in the castle
And along with it came a battle

It was a distance memory now because the child has now grew
Many things in this child that made memories stew
My name is Mastrey, a young orphan who was there that night
Mastrey saw her in the distance and her father and mother in his sight
Everyone was loud that night and made all the children hide
But that evening Mastrey saw her mother and father die

She ran into the bushes in such a fright
And evil doers were running around with flashlights
Mastrey remember it as he distracted them 
Her eyes was so confused with problems
Mastrey new that it was because of what just occurred
His feelings of what those people did was not awkward

The distraction worked, he went back to were she was
Hiding and very scared she was, he asked her, can you trust me just because?
Her answer that night depended on her lively hood
As Mastrey was their with his hand reaching out to her as he stood
Pulling her up from the ground he looked into her eyes that were SeaBlue
Mastrey had made a life long friend and love, She knew it was true

Next: My Story Telling,  Who is this Princess


Details | Free verse | |

Can't wait to meet the Sea

Rushing down the mountains
It jumps with glee
Can’t wait to meet the sea

Winds through the mountains
Forests, valleys and greens
Fishes and insects sail along
Feeds Animals and Birds with joy

Its color matches the sky
Pure and virgin
Rushes through the land of man
Can’t wait to meet the sea

Man calls it river
Makes it flow like gutter
The sky is polluted
The river matches the sky

Slows down the river
Misused and abused
Where is the sea?

It hits upon a wall
It leaps upon and peeps
The other side, dry and barren
Far away rests the sea

Waits for the walls to open
Feeds the parched lands with bliss
Winds down the offered path
Can it meet the sea?


Details | Ballad | |

Antigone

I am the face of misery
My life, a dissonance of autumn and spring,
The years are written in the same
Lugubrious, nostalgic grey
How can it be the author to blame?
I cannot scream this all away…
Burn nor Bleed this all away…
To Death I am Ordained

Lacuna ever growing
With Velvet sheets of life flowing
Aeons apart of my "royalty"
Under the mask the cannot see...
Can you dispel this tragedy:
Antigone - Epiphany failing

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

No words of hope
No words of hate
Do I have Lenore to send to me:
The sordid child of Thebes
Caught In the longest nightmare
life - the slowest way to die

I know this is my life 
But I'm not under control
under the mask the will see
Just Another Human

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

Can you dispel my life; this tragedy?
Can you control the storm in my mind?
I'm asking you: can you rid me
Of The Curse of Antigone?


Details | Sonnet | |

Sunken Tears

                                   He stood bravely before me 
                           with a medal of honor in his right hand
                        and a bandage of agony around his left knee
                           It seemed like he had struggled to stand,
                             his crutches lay useless on the ground
                                 I found it hard to understand why,
                                 a soldier in pain didn't even frown
                                      With a voice firm but dry
                                 his words shook me like thunder
                                "You're now the man of this house"
                                 he uttered like a worn-out hunter
                            quivering up my legs like a terrified mouse
                                 Drowning my mind through cold ears
                        he passed his sincere respect and sunken tears


Details | Free verse | |

Conspiracy: Who Killed The Easter Bunny

A crowded table, all suspended in shock 
The sound of the shot dimming to a ‘knock’
Only silence, except for the marching clock
The weapon still smoking; an anonymous glock
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Loud cries arise from the elongated table,
Jack Frost is shocked, the Tooth Fairy unable
To speak whilst Santa is checking the stable
For clues on the erstwhile maidservant Mable
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

They searched for hours, called in C.S.I,
Panic set in, would the children all cry?
Sandman confirmed the bunny had died
Batman suspected somebody had lied
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Guests were quizzed, interrogations began
The mystery unfolded when Santa Claus ran,
Grabbing the pies, he tried escaping in a van
But was stopped in his tracks by superman
SANTA KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY!


Details | Rhyme | |

Fantasy Vs Reality

I’m livin’ the reality as fantasies haunt me
With butterfly thoughts like fantasies serene
The reality I’m livin’ is so overwhelming
So let the truth hurt while I live in this fantasy
So Imma live with Wonka in the chocolate factory
Reality’s incomplete as it kneels down on one knee
Proposing to me at a chance on life
But fantasy in my ear beggin’ me to be wife
I’m on this emotional roller coaster with reality
Tryin’ to face myths of “ The Fantasy Extreme”
Extremities of fantasies read the thoughts of my body
As reality sinks in consuming my soul’s mind….legally probably
I dream with fantasy only to wake up to reality
They say in reality dreams come true at the scene
But I wonder if they know that fantasy fulfills my lustful needs
When reality is boring and I just don’t wanna dream
So I guess since fantasy is fiction I can’t do nothin’ with it…
I’ll just keep writing on this path of Non-fiction
Cause at least with reality…when I speak…you listen

Written by Aleasha Martin


Details | Free verse | |

Look At Yourself

You love this man you claim, But still you flirt with others
On your hand you tattooed his name, Said I love you and
Caused so much pain

Getting drunk to feel alive,Solely but slowly your dying inside
Talk is cheap you say, Actions are what's real
The cards are on the table and it's time for you to deal

I tried to help you , All I could
And understanding, I thought you would
My trusting you would be, A great mistake indeed

Weak I know you're not, But selfish is what you are
I'm not trying to be rude, Or hurt you in any way
I just want you to get a clue and to live another day

You choose to live, Or you choose to die
It's not up to me, Not anymore
I gave you the options but the choices are yours
I'm looking at you, And all I can see
Is a frightened little girl, As fragile as can be

You ruined your life, When you began to drink
You hurt your children, Why didn't you think?
With alcohol and drugs , There's no way out
You'll always scream and shout about
You against the world, That is how you see
And all your loyal friends became enemies

You can't tell the day, You can't tell the time
All you can tell is what color of wine-
It is that you're drinking
You've lost all touch with reality...


Details | Classicism | |

Like it was Before

It rained today 
Just like yesterday, just like the day before,
Just like it had rained two months ago.
It has rained for many years now.

It has rained, but no one 
pays attention anymore –a boring drizzle
one can get used to, and one can live with.  
And so men on earth have done, 
lived with it for many years now.

At first, everyone wondered why it rained so much;
Would it ever stop, so that we can live life like it was before- 
under the sun, always warm, always happy? 

But it seems it will not stop, 
it seems heavier rains loom, 
and rougher storms,
where mere life is at stake. 

Eventually, the sun will also emerge, 
but faintly; with tender rays 
that cannot make us warm, 
that cannot make us forget the rain. 

They say, though, that one only has to get used
to the rain, and forget that it is there, 
and that it is raining. 
Then, they say, things will get better, 
we will find joy in the little things, 
and all will be like it was before.  


Details | Rhyme | |

God Gave Me A Talent I Didn't Use It

God Gave Me A Talent…  I Didn’t Use It!

God gave me a talent, but I chose to refuse it.
I had it…  But didn’t want to use it!

God also gave me the ability to use what was given.
But it just “didn’t fit in” with my style of livin’!

The talent he gave, he wanted for me to share...
Although I went to church…  I just didn’t care!

I was like someone who “buried the talent in the ground.”
When God came looking…  I was nowhere to be found.

I was embarrassed of what he gave and ashamed.
I didn’t want to talk about Jesus, 
or mention his name…

I wanted to be careful of who was my friend.
If I were to use God’s talent, I may easily “offend.”

We all have talents. God’s given them to each one.
He’s given to us his spirit and Christ Jesus his son!

All that we need to accomplish his purpose and goal…
He wants to use us!  He loves us more than we know!

Will you “bury” the talents that God’s given to you?
Or will you just “turn your back” like others do?

He has a divine will for us all.  A purpose and plan!
He waits for you… With an outstretched hand!

Won’t you allow him to use you HIS way?
Please do it now!  Listen to what HE has to say!

HIS blessings in your life is for you to receive!
Reach out to him now! Trust and believe.!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

Visiting Emotion

Hello disappointment
You visit me pretty often these days
Wish I could say seeing you again was an amusement
I'm hoping your coming so much is just a faze
Mr. Disappointment you’re becoming the only feelings I feel anymore
The happiness has started to fade away 
I want our old life back where we were in love and a bore
Mr. Disappointment you make my life dark and gray
I miss the times where I would laugh and giggle for hours
I miss the times when I was the only one he wanted to be around
When you come around disappointment its tears and long hot showers
This love I used to feel is starting to be such a big let down
I don't want to be treated like this 
I have to show him I am worth caring about 
I miss our happy bliss
It's either he straighten up or finds a different route
Goodbye disappointment I want my baby’s kiss


Details | Narrative | |

Divinity

Finally..Mr.Whitman, I understand as my journey is symbolic to yours; but, through my poverty-strickened doors. Fighting your human instincts... while learning your internal glow within. Frightening, enlightening, inviting his omnipresence in and as your reward he transforms you into him. Breathing your FIRST breath again. Loving life from the core of the earth to the pull of the moon. Stuck in the middle yet understanding all of the connectivity; because I'm living in a state of Divinity.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

GOAL

written 28th Sept 2007


I need to find a goal
 no longer to live life of a broken soul
Living a lie...just to get by
 I've past all the pain
And left with there stain
 a new life is now in reach
This new world beside the beach
 no longer do I continuously pray
Hidden for so long
 I don't know where I belong
To start it all over
 is as hard as an alcoholic...to stay sober
Where do I begin?
 how far do I jump in?
This new life is rather very frightening
 I'm scared and taunted
But no longer am I haunted
 the first steps I have begun taken
To walk with my head held high and awaken
 I have finally found my soul
Now Lord, I ask what is to be my goal?


Details | Narrative | |

A Tangled Web

Nearly empty inside, my life fading fast,which direction should I take.  Starring blankly at the T in the road, an important decision I need to make.

Sinking fast in an empty sea, scrambling to stay alive.  Struggling just to stay a float, loosing the will I need to survive.

Paralyzed in fear, afraid of moving ahead, leading a life of disappointments and defeat.  Locked down in chains, nowhere to go, caught in a tangled wed of deceit.

With a soul that's damaged beyond repair, displaying every intimate and personal detail.  There's humiliation learking around every corner I take, highlighting every moment I have failed.

Drowning under piles of secrets and lies, slowly suffocating with every breath I take.  Trapped behind the burning flames of hell, it's a gamble with my life as the stakes.

All of my stability and security stripped down, exposing every secret I tried to hide.  Running now on auto pilot, defensive mode my emotions I'll keep buried deep inside.

Where do I go from here, the damage can't be erased.  Reality sets in a little to hard, when it smacked me suddenly in the face.


Details | Free verse | |

Black widow murderer

Unwittingly sucked in
entangled within lifes cobwebs
poisoned wrapped and saved for later

Until satisfaction for hunger is needed
preyed upon with slow satisfaction and pride
despite the deceit and trickery of enticement

Faced with soulful persecution of honesty
reality and truth to be lost forever
whilst deceitful one is admired

Displayed devouring of specimen
No trial nor retribution, let others fall fate
alas before finished – destiny will strike

Poor black widow will choke
own untimely death from own grip of life
suffocating truths stifled now smothering


Details | Free verse | |

My Future Generation

I can act insane
But DO NOT 
Make me feel worthless

I belong in God’s family
He will bless my future generation

Don’t punish me for
Being myself –
Don’t envy my glee 

I can act like an
Adult, but I’d 
Prefer to have joy…

Not stress…
That piles upon us in our 
Everyday lives

Being childlike is

A rare beauty – 

No one prizes it…

No one came across it…

In this lifetime…

I can laugh all day
I can make you smile
If you’d accept my 
Childlike dreams of mine
Don’t treat me like a sick swine

Renew my young heart
Give me the ability 
To kill the old man…

I have my place in God’s family
He’ll be adored and glorified 
We’ll exchange prayers and hugs  
By my future generation

I beg of you – 
Don’t kill my childlike mentality
I’ll behave myself…
I’m positively sure that I’ll make you happy

I’ll still have pieces of a child in me

And pass it on to my future generation…


Details | Couplet | |

Unknown

Who am I?
Am I defined by what is near in sight?
Am I defined by what I have done,
Or am I defined by what I could become?

Perhaps I'm of no use.
To him, or her, or I, nor you.
Or perhaps I'm too misunderstood to be defined,
And it is something like understanding that comes in time.

And if to the world I'm never shown,
Yet in my own light I've grown and grown,
And so I can know no happiness but my own--
The reason for my smile, to you, will forever be unknown.

I do not pray for the world to know my name.
For it and verse; the letters are the same.
And if a man should find his sorrow in what he reads,
I pray his pain my words to keep. 

Should his eyes rain on my page,
Better tears than storms of rage.
And if a man should find his sorrow in what he reads.
I pray his pain my words to keep.

And if to the world you're never shown,
Yet in your own light you've grown and grown,
And so you know no happiness but your own.
Let the reason for your smile, to you, only be known.


Details | Rhyme | |

Political Correctness Brings Spiritual Weakness

Political Correctness Brings Weakness!

In our country’s pursuit of “political correctness…”
We’re not in a position of strength…  But weakness!
It’s like you can’t hardly say anything anymore…
And you find yourself outside the courtroom’s door!
We may think we’re strong…   But we’re weakened!
You may ask; “how could all of this happen???”

We’ve attempted to replace God with a “new morality.”
This has brought a new generation of “moral depravity.”
We bend our laws to what is called; “constitutional.”
And forget about what is truth!  And what is biblical!
Even the ten commandments are often ridiculed and scorned.
As a great rise of ungodly living has been formed!
A tide of sexual perversion is what has taken place!
Bringing into my homes, much heartache and disgrace!

God’s truth is often “thrown out,” and avoided!
While a “new kind of living” has often been decided!
We need YOU Jesus!  Now!  More than ever before!
Our sins, on the old rugged cross, is what he bore!
Jesus is the answer to our problems!  He is the solution!
His blood can take away all of the sinful pollution!
Please dear lord, touch and convict us with your power!
Please heal this nation!  We need YOU this hour!

By Jim Pemberton   09/30/13





Details | Rhyme | |

We Need To Honor Our Parents

May We Honor Our Parents…

I know of many parents who tried their best to raise their kids.
Many of their hearts cry because of how their children live.

There’s many who’ve tried to teach their children God’s holy ways.
What was taught, seems to be lost…  In a matter of days.

Many parent’s pray for their children’s lives.
Many of their children choosing to live a life of “lies.”

Scripture says to honor our parents, 
that our days may be long.
But any kind of honor to them…, 
Many feel doesn’t belong!

The advice and warnings from parents 
seem to be ignored.
Many of their children say they’re 
“too old fashioned and bored.”

There’s a message for the young people that needs to be clear!
You need to honor your parents! 
 One day they shall “disappear!”

God gave us the parents we have, 
whether we accept this or not.
We need to think about the things that our parents taught!

May we seek to live lives that will bring honor and grace.
In our hearts, may we keep our parents in a “special place!”

May we share from our hearts, the love our lord has given!
May we share his love while
 our parents are still livin’!

The love we can give our parents is a treasure untold!
The gift of having parents is more precious than gold!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

For All Of My Sin Guilt And Shame

For All Of My Sin, Guilt And Shame… The sins I’ve committed… There are so many. Is there any hope for me. Is there ANY? The things I’ve done have caused me much shame. I’m often embarrassed when others call my name. My past failures and mistakes. They abound! And have a tendency to “pull me down.” I’ve often felt “unlovable” with a discouraged mind. It seems like my life, “is racing against time.” I was told that Jesus loves me and can make me whole. How could someone like this love me? I’ll never know. How could a God who’s so merciful and lovable. Find anything inside of me… That’s “valuable?” I’ve read in hi word, that he purchased my life with his. An abundant and eternal life… He freely gives! Dear Jesus. I ask you to come into my life and wash it clean. I ask you to be my Lord. My righteousness. My everything! For all of my failures, mistakes and every sin. I long for your presence and peace within! Only YOU can restore my life through your gift of salvation. I give you my heart. And an opened invitation! Thank you Lord! For the work that you’re going to do. I want you to know how much I love and appreciate YOU! By Jim Pemberton 09/21/11


Details | Rhyme | |

Overcoming Evil with Goodness

Overcoming Evil With Good...

"Do not be overcome by evil, 
 but overcome evil with good."
This verse from scripture
 is often misunderstood.

Many tend to "get back" at someone 
who's "wronged them."
Whether it be from a stranger... or even a friend.

You cannot fight evil with evil--
this isn't God's plan!
His concept of love and mercy-- you
 need to understand.

Remember  the words Jesus said in the beatitudes.
Perhaps this can stop any 
"revengeful attitudes."

You were called to be holy--
with Godliness in mind.
To be filled with his mercy... 
being gentle and kind.

Rise above whatever evil 
may come your way/
Overcome by doing this with 
God's goodness... today!

Allow the cross of Christ to be
 lifted up in your life.
Allow his spirit to remove all malice,
 bitterness and strife.

A compassionate and loving person 
in you... others will see!
What you do today--will impact your eternity!

An overcomer of evil is often
 difficult to do.
Obey and trust God--
He will see you through!

By Jim Pemberton 
Rom. 12:21


Details | Rhyme | |

Blank Page

Too long have I been staring at this cruel blank page before me, My crazed, hysteric mind screaming and imploring I know there is a message that's dying to come out— I need to fill this confounded page without the slightest doubt! It's a simple predicament to manipulate, Into a mass of thought A futile attempt to insinuate, Weak hints are left with naught I sit here in silent desperation, What can fill this page? I slap myself in indignation, My eagerness becoming rage! Like roaches sporadically running from light My thoughts are but a haze The words I write just don't seem right, On this cruel blank page!


Details | Epigram | |

The End

The end only comes after having started.


Details | Rhyme | |

Morals Morality and Ethical Direction


Morals, Morality and Ethical Direction… We often hear of morals, morality and ethical direction. What they mean, I suppose, is “one’s discretion.” Very seldom, is anything from the Bible being heard. Why obey God’s commandments? Why, that’s absurd! Many claim, that as adults, just about anything is “o.k.” As long as you don’t do what they do, but what they say! Many are “bombarded” with sexual type of temptations… Often leading many to get into perverse addictions! We set up boards of people to try to be “ethically clean.” When it comes down to it… What does this really mean? Can a person be totally immoral, but 100% ethical?’ Does this, in some way, seem kind of “heretical?” Why believe in God? He’s been ruled “unconstitutional.” While many listen to the news, which is often “delusional!” We hear of perversions, that are often “glorified.” Do we hear of those wanting to be Godly sanctified? If you’re confused, and need some kind of spiritual guide! Look to God’s word! He has nothing to hide! The kind of morality and ethics that you’ll ever need… Can be found in the Bible! Open it and read! Why not read from Genesis through Revelation? We can all find what we need! Across our nation! God and his word give us a true moral compass for living! His life for our own lives, is what he’s freely giving! Won’t you come to Jesus for godly direction today? He is here! And wants to help you find HIS way! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

In his footsteps

On his shoulders 
he carried 
me,
when I tarried 
when young.
He’d huddle me close,
and tell me the stories
Of how he grew up.
The things that he loved to do most.

Correct me when wrong.
And punish when bad he’d
Protect me from harm,
And when ill -
He’d wrap me in blankets,
And nurse by my side,
Till one day I grew up
And rebelled.

In your footsteps 
You wanted
Me to have followed,
And done everything by your will.
But I’m my own person,
So listen to my side,
Are you in with me this time
Or still…?

Do you not answer?
Hear my pain call?
As I struggle to find my own way.
Is it time I departed?
Is it time that I learnt?
To have my own will
What d’you say?

Well I’m sorry 
You’re silent.
You’re so disappointed.
But I know that you feel
I am wrong.
I can’t take this no longer
I’m so full of anger.
To my misery
Is there no end?

Well I’m out!...
Do you hear me?...
Dont misunderstand me.
I’m grateful for what you have done.
But for now
I don’t know me.
I don’t know the answers.
I’ll pack up my things and be gone!

But then
you say to me
Just listen – child listen,
One day 
you will settle
You’ll see.
You’ll be married. 
With children.
Putting food on the table -
Working hard to bring in the dough
Then you’ll think of these words
Just follow my footsteps
That way you will
Come to no harm.

And the voice in your head
Will silently say -
I told you,
Was right all along.
I’m your father
I taught you to follow 
my footsteps;
To know what is right and
Whats wrong!


Details | Rhyme | |

Dialogue of Souls


Best of friends, for countless years,
we had the best of times.
Now as my eyes are filled with tears,
your soul to Heaven climbs.
The path we take, not always clear,
I feel so lost without you here.
Your last words, prophetic now,
“I’ll be home soon”- you knew somehow.
You left me here, I’m so alone,
but I dreamed Heaven had a phone.
We talked all night, you fell asleep,
I held the line to hear you breathe…  

 

   Copyright © 2013


Details | Haiku | |

ZOOKEEPER

Lookin' after pests
Keepin' a CLOSE eye on 'em
"Those wild animals!"

Roamin' around zoo
Searchin' for sneaky monkey
Hidin' in a tree

Zookeeper gets mad
"Where's Marty, the smartypants!?"
"He TOOK my cage keys!"


Details | I do not know? | |

The Master Mind of Numbers

Ever since I have stepped into modernization, I have been pinched with values of the ancestors,
I cannot believe that the inside does not reflect the outside anymore,
When one says he or she has changed and become open minded, 
Is it only to make one feel temporarily pleased or is just to enjoy hurting a person,
Why has age become a factor or an excuse to start a new problem?

Every time a heart skips a beat, the warm sensation takes place, a friendly chat takes place,
Numbers begin to swirl around. The intellectual chat, attraction of like minds,
Or even the rebellious differences stand in a corner against numbers.
Time flies and so does one progress with various experiences. 
Does it matter if you are too old or young to be with someone?

Who gets to judge about numbers?
Nothing occurs very young but takes place during adulthood with mature thinking. 
How should one deal when age becomes a problem to a new relationship?
More or less, does anyone have the right to judge if one is not married at a certain age.
With observation, reading various articles, numbers have created a nuisance in the mind of shallow thinkers in many societies.

When all the feelings are right, then why do numbers go wrong?
Doesn’t sensibility, love, responsibility or even security count or is it overshadowed with age.
Still one may try to let go and filter some thoughts, but how does one filter attraction and passion.
Years have passed by and still the jackpot of excuses concerning numbers have polluted various communities. A spark of hope is still there when faith and true love will attain blessings from the higher self and well-wishers always.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

The Rain and Wind

The wind blew events all over the place.
Intense emotions and it gave chase.
Lightning lighting to show us the sky.
People try to sleep and not cry.
Wisping by the wind keeps us awake.
The time trying to sleep the storms take.
Chills in everyone gives all shiver.
The clouds surrounded by moonlight is silver.
Heavenly prayers that the rain will stop.
The flood stopped a car the person in it was a cop.
People have seen such devastation.
The road that people made was week in creation.
Rivers near by was over flowing.
Trees that were there was not showing.
By the hour it claimed many.
My father woke up and did not see any.
Floating by was a boat.
Keeping people above water and a float.
My father kept a canoe.  
That some day we would use it, that he knew.
Time to paddle up and down the street.
The rain water kept getting on our seat.
It was so dark after the moon was behind the cloud.
Still the noise of thunder still covered the ears loud.
The smell of moist water never seem to go away.
My brothers seem to still sleep anyway.
My head was bobbing up and down.
I was so tired that I could not hear a sound.
The wind blew back and fourth.
It seems that my mom and dad paddle their worth.
Till all the people we saw with grace.
Help us out with embrace.
The time was so late at night.
Everyone was so sleepy and losing sight.
The fight with the weather was so hectic.
The feelings of energy was electric.
Losing to such natural disaster is hard to understand.
When people working hard to block the river with bags of sand.
With hard workers like my mom and dad.
They make things happen that is not bad.
Rough with weather they experience more than ever.
Leaders they are they are very clever.
From the night light of street lights to the morning glow.
The wind did not stop so.
Bringing in more clouds that ill.
The people who were still tired still had will.
The rush of water and waves blasting push the wall side.
Pushing and the force brought water inside.
The battle of our hour was getting long.
Backup people came to aid us was strong.
Rested they were to keep everyone with hope.
The people stopped the water with the strength of rope.
Heavy rain and loss of homes bring people together.
It is kind of sad that this was the only time to gather.
Chaos comes happiness how true.
This is why we are human that gives us a clue.
It is our nature to keep rain falling.
To know when it is time for our calling.
The winds bring such pain and sorrow.
That is why rain sometimes fallow.








Details | Rhyme | |

I'm Not the Kind of Person God Wants Me to Be

I’m not the kind of person I need to be! There’s too many problems inside of me! I’m not the kind of person you’d want to know… I’ve too many worries and a troubled soul! I’m the kind of person who has a lot of stress! Lately, my life has been one big mess! I’m the kind of person who doesn’t have a friend. You listen to me now… But may never see me again! I’m the kind of person who’s gone through pain! I wake up some days, and don’t even know my name! I may not be the kind of person you’d want to be around. I may get discouraged, and “get you down.” I’m the kind of person who’s giving Jesus a chance… I know he loves me! Whatever the circumstance! I’m the kind of person who needs a lot of prayer! I know that God listens! And is always there! Please help me Jesus! That I may be set free! May it be your love that others will see! Thank you Jesus! For being my savior and friend! You’re someone that this person can always depend! I’m not the kind of person that Jesus wants me to be! That’s why I need more of HIM! And LESS of me! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

Healing Can Only Happen When the Pain Is Gone

Healing Can Only happen,
 When the Pain is Gone!

Healing can only happen, when the pain
 and damage are gone!
It can only come about, when there’s
 no “lists” of wrongs!

People need to move ahead, and put all
 of the past behind them!
And seek God’s forgiveness, 
so his grace can find ‘em!

Too many carry a load of sorrow
 and grief that they can’t afford!
They need to bring everything to Jesus,
 and make him their LORD!

How can we experience healing,
 if the suffering is still there?
How will we ever be able to love others,
 and truly care?

May we all seek the kind of healing,
 that only Christ can bring!
May we allow him to remove
 all pain and suffering!

Jesus…  We need your healing now!  More than ever before!
It is your love that we must learn
 to treasure and adore!

Please come now and refresh us with your awesome love!
The sweetness of your Holy Spirit, is a gift from above!

Thank you God!  The pain is gone and the healing has come!
All praise, glory and honor to Jesus!
 God’s anointed son!

By Jim Pemberton   10/19/13


Details | Narrative | |

Physically and Mentally Abuse

I was born in a world of poverty and soiled life of a third world country
The way I lived till I was five years of age was walls of boundary
These walls had towers of guards that had no heart or care
If a child would try to climb the wall they lose their life I swear

Father had drank and threatened my mother with a knife
My father lost his job and wife and that was the hardship of life
He stopped my mother from taking off with me in her arm
Hoping that my father would ignore and left me be with no harm

When my father went off to drink one night and came home with rage
My brothers stood by my crib and took a beating that set up the next stage
My father had woken up to three scared children half starved and in pain
His final words as he walk away from the orphanage gate live life do not go insane

I was still a baby in the orphanage; the caretakers did not really care about the babies
They stole items and materials those wicked men and maternal evil ladies
They starved all the babies because it cost a lot to keep them alive
As a child of that age I could feel the sins and greed that gave out bad vibes

I was ignorant about what I drank and ate, as I see white maggots move in my bottle
As I see them move I thought about how they were playing and some were hostel
They ate each other to keep each other alive in a manner that took me by surprise
In the back round I hear others throwing things with sounds of painful cries

I got very strong at a young age I was able to start pulling myself up over the cage
My feelings were to see my brothers with strong lungs that I cried out of rage
My two brothers came to see me and sneak food into my crib
The caretaker would find the food in my hands as they grabbed it and hit me on my ribs

As painful as it was I kept eating the food with blood in my mouth as it was instinct
I sometimes laid in my crib dazed and confused with smell of death so distinct
With all my might I kept myself strong and climb the small wall
I finally was old enough to get out of the building and I could hear my brothers call

With tears of joy with short legs that ran as fast as my heart
I ran to my brothers arms and held their hands to have a new start
I grew stronger everyday but more things came into my life in a manner of dismay
If my brothers stay by my side I could smile and everyday their would be okay



Details | Lyric | |

Miles

I write
my late night revelations
paint an image so clear-
so precise-
as if fine-tuned with a microscope.
I see the truth.
I now realize that what I need-
I want-
is YOU.
I don't know how I am going to make you see,
make you feel...
I need to make you know.
A simple touch is all I need
to delve into your mind and infect you.
But how to reach you?
You are hidden far away
within your own mind,
in maze of your own design.
Between us locked doors and endless traps,
mountains,
valleys,
rivers, lakes, oceans,
miles and miles of 
impassible terrain that keeps me apart,
keeps me from you!
We are two universes set to collide-
not to be destroyed,
but merge into one.
Set to collide, but keep missing our mark.
This is unbeknownst to you.
I keep the secrets within me.
How much longer can I wait-
how much longer until my silence
consumes me?
Until you break me?
I am deserted, alone,
left in desolation.
You are the answer to the questions,
the key to my freedom.
But you cannot reach me.
And you do not know what you are.
How much longer til my time runs out?


Details | Rhyme | |

I Have Time For Church But NO Time For You


I’m so busy with church… I don’t have much time… But God forgives me…. So is this a crime? I go each Sunday, and do “the church thing.” I’m just too busy, to really do anything! I’m there on time. I try not to be late. I even give my ten percent into the offering plate! I bring my Bible, and wear a suit and tie. I sing the worship songs, shout and cry. Do you need any help or prayer? Please wait in line…. I’m busy right now! And don’t have the time! I’ll direct you to the pastor to make an appointment… Perhaps he’ll pray and give you an anointment! This is what I offer! And the best I can do!. I just don’t have the time for people like you! Maybe I’ll see you again. Maybe I won’t… But giving my time for others? I simply don’t… I’m trying to look good for my “Sunday appearance.” Anything less, would be a “new experience.” I hope you’ll forgive me for saying “excuse me.” Maybe I’ll find another time for you to be with me…. By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

I Didn't Come To Church For Coffee

I Didn’t Come to Church For Coffee… I didn’t come to church for coffee… I came for prayer. In all of this entertainment. Is God still there? I didn’t come for a latte stand. Or for a couch to sit in. I came to meet a God who can take away my sin! I came to spend time with God. I don’t mean to be rude. But in all this kind of “excitement.” I’m not in the mood . I have a need. I need someone to simply listen. Everyone’s “too busy” in doing what they feel is “God’s mission.” Nothing here in this building really get’s me “excited.” If I wanted to... A “trip to Las Vegas,” could be provided. I came to meet Jesus. His presence is powerful and relevant. I need his touch right now. This is so evident! Jesus said his house; “is a house of prayer.” “Not a den of thieves.” From what I see here… Is this what everyone believes? I will seek his direction. Wherever he may lead me! Even if this church doesn’t receive me! I come to YOU God. You are filled with holiness and great power! Behold the Lord God… Could come THIS VERY HOUR! By Jim Pemberton 11/08/11


Details | Ballad | |

My addiction

I have an addiction...
It dont matter what time of day it is my addiction is there...
Not always in the literall since...
But it is always on my mind...
I lay my head down to sleep at night thinking about you...
I sleep dreaming about you...
I wake up thinking about you...
Your always on my mind...
No matter what I do my addiction is always on my mind...
Even if your not the last one I talk to before I lay my head down to sleep...
I still lay my head down thinking of you...
I just cant get enought of you...
No matter what my addiction is there...
My addiction has a name...
Her name is Shelby Nestle...
No matter how much we text or talk on the phone...
Its never enough...
I cant get enough of your beautiful eyes...
I cant get enough of that beautiful smile...
I cant get enough of kissing your soft lips...
That feeling I get inside when our lips touch...
Or holding you in my arms...
This is a new addiction to me...
Never have I been this addicted this quick...
It scares the shyt outta me...
But then I love it...
You are my new addiction baby... 
You are my...
My heroin...
My ecstacy... 
My cocaine...
You are my own personal drug...
I cant imagine and addiction stronger...
You are my addiction...
I wouldnt even think about trying to break this addiction...
I wouldnt go to rehab for this addiction...
I like it to much...
YOU ARE PERFECT JUST THE WAY YOU ARE


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Questioning Life

Forget! Regret not, for it all has intention...
To attempt comprehension leads to double block wall.
In searching your question, much more loss is gotten, 
Confusion, dismay a deeper dug hole.
Infinitely seeking you strive for some meaning, 
the truth is quite simple you are not sole at all! 
Infusion connection the union eternal, 
Is easy to grasp when knowledge of whole,
is truly encountered from deep within query
The meaning the truth the love of it all...
Once trouble & strife and struggle are missing,
The clear light of being shows beauty once more.
Accept what is given agree to the treaty.
Fight not with your fears, and answer your call.
Find substance in living, step over delusions. 
Regardless of meaning, life’s radiance will soar.
So use this awareness these words and this practice,
Come forth tall and sturdy, head high and recall..
When sad and when empty in need of intention,
No doubts I plead! No need to explore!
Emotions you hold are sensed by your siblings,   
Your waves of sensation your truth and your soul... 
Are parts of us all, we are all together we are all but one!
In oneness we’re whole! 


Details | Tyburn | |

I'm Going Nuts

<                                          insane
                                            constrain
                                            domain
                                            remain


                        asylum housing      -    insane   constrain
                        longing for rescue  -    domain   remain


Details | Free verse | |

I am behind the wheel

I am behind the wheel
things move quickly by
I feel like I ‘m being pulled along 
by the machine
new  gauges 
just keep coming 
and going around

the faster I go
the greater the outside winds
the greater the noise
garbage flies speedily by
in all directions
some of it hits me 
and sticks

the outside noises are great
they confuse me
they cloud the music
and the surroundings
and overcome 
communications
and relations

I must 
keep the windows closed
to keep out the outside noise
I must try to take control 
of the machine 
slow down speed up
right turn left turn
never never stop

I am told 
that I must keep going
fast
somewhere
to succeed
hands on the wheel
foot on the throttle
never never look back

I ‘m afraid 
to stop
how will I get 
where I’m going
once I no where
how will I find it
how will I know


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: III

Beauty of nature
Why condense it down to God?
Isn’t life enough?


Details | Tanka | |

Why Does She Hate Me

Unconscionable She attacks my weak ego My sure existence I hurt with ultimate pain Crushing my very being She destroys my peace All which brings pleasure to me Sure does falter here I don’t know her reasoning For my love is hers alone
Russell Sivey


Details | Monorhyme | |

My Friend - I Miss You Backwards Contest

I miss you so...
Wordless... I miss you
without you I'm uninspired
a mute, my voice is truly yours
Speechless, numb, and empty

whats sometimes hard to show
that which I cannot say
I hope you feel it, I pray you know
this bares no question
My friend without strings... I do miss you so

so confused about what to do
I'm unable to handle what's true
sometimes our reality is conflicted
I sit back and marvel in thoughts of you

**For Matt Caliri's "Write a Poem Backwards" Contest


Details | Burlesque | |

Suburban Spring

Suburban Spring	
(4.15.10)


	Springtime fills the air, 
			like laughing gas.
		(Or maybe more like whiskey.)
The suburbs are drunk on the nectar of it's dawn.
	Middle-class houses 
			are starting to dance.
		(Or maybe they're just wobbling.)
They vomit whole families onto their lawn.

			I watch them the same way dogs watch TV:
				Confused and intrigued, 
		with a slight urge to pee.

	The father cuts grass, 
			like a sleepwalker.
		(Or maybe more like a zombie -
Ravenous for cheap beer, instead of brains.)
	A six pack later, 
			he starts washing his car.
		(Or watering his driveway.)
He's spreading on wax so he's set when it rains.

	The mother kneels in dirt, 
			tending the garden.
		(More like digging in a sandbox.)
Her spade is rusty.  (Figuratively, at least.)
	A sunset later, 
			she cooks family dinner.
		(Or maybe orders some pizza.)
(If every mouth is fed, she can call it a feast.)

			I watch them the same way dogs watch TV.

	The son plays war games, 
			dying for fun.
		(Or maybe more for practice.)
He whines about fruit drinks, as well as the heat.
	A full pitcher later, 
			tweaking on sugar,
		(Or maybe just corn starch.)
the war escalates, 'til its time to go eat.

	The daughter makes a picnic, 
			inviting her toys.
		(Or maybe not.)
(Her plastic spread can only spread so thin!)
	After the tea time, 
			she's off picking flowers.
		(Or maybe weeds.)
(As long as they're pretty, there's a vase that they'll fit in.)

		They gather, as a family, at the table to say grace.
		They hold each others' hands and say, "Amen."  
			(And proceed to stuff their face.)

	The dog sits by the boy - 
			Loyal and true.
		(Or maybe just hungry.)
He drools as he stares from the corners of his eyes.
	After dinner, 
                     he offers to help with the dishes.
		(Or maybe he demands it.)
The boy sneaks him a bite.  The dog is not surprised.

	Bedtime comes soon after.  
			The kids are sent to brush their teeth.
		(Or maybe just to run the sink.)
They put on their jammies, and to bed, they go.
	After tucking them in, 
			the parents watch TV.
		(Or maybe they just dream they do, 
					sleeping in its glow.)

	The dog is changing channels, 
			looking for a better show.
				Confused and intrigued, 
		he pees on the carpet below.


Details | Rhyme | |

Where Is My Life Going


As I think about where my life has been...
It’s hard to believe that I’m still here again!

I think about the many things
 I’ve been through.
And ask myself the question; 
“what am I going to do?”

With the trials of life, 
have come trials.
A life filled with uncertainty 
and many “traveled miles.”

It’s like riding the waves of life’s stormy sea.
Never knowing where the next wave will take me!

Everything I know...  And all that I’ve done…
I lay down my life at the feet of Jesus... 
 God’s precious son!

I ask you Jesus for mercy!  I come to you now!
I come before your majesty and humbly bow!

You’ve brought love and wholeness within!
You’ve given me a “new life!”  
And took away my sin!

I love and thank you Lord, 
for your hand extended!
The beauty of your holiness
 is to be commended!

You brought to me hope,
 in a hopeless situation!
And have given to me 
the wonderful gift of salvation!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

What Am I

What Am I?

I am long, dark, and sleek
I carry death and life with me
Others like me this I do seek
I can deliver death to those that I see

I have heavy doors; no windows thick 
I have a tail that is long and thin
I have a surface that is slippery and slick
Pushed by composite materials outside my skin

I have a sail and rudder but I am not a boat
I have fins but I am not a fish
I can swallow air without a throat
I can keep in the air however long you wish

I can not talk but I can make a sound
I do not travel fast but rather slow
I can see only the surface but hear all around
I can not travel high but I can go low

On the surface I may seem small
But I am larger than you will believe
I am teardrop shaped but not tall
Those I protect I hope soundly they do sleep

What am I?


Details | Rhyme | |

Is This It

There are no new dreams for me to seek
My life is all written, everyday just seems bleak
I have made all my choices, my future is set
No more days to look forward to just duty and debt
I've lived all my new days that I have to live
Now everyday is mundane and all I do is give
I miss all the new things that being young brings
Theres new love and new dreams and all sorts of things
Now all there is is work, laundry, dishes, and kids
I know when I wake this is all my day brings
I've given up on wishing, I've given up on dreams. I've given up on hoping this is 
how it all seems.
Some days I don't even want to get out of bed
I wish I could just lay down and rest my tired head
I've looked and I've looked for excitment to come
But as of today I can't think of just one
I look at my kids and see dreams in their eyes
But instead of being happy for them I just turn and cry
I know this is wrong, I know it's not fair
I should be a better mother and show them I care
I want them to have their hopes and their dreams
To have a better life than my past could bring
And even though I know this is the life I'm destin to have
I still want more , does that seem so bad?


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Life

The unrealistic acts we put on to manipulate one another, living and sleeping with active minds. The act of evil smelling over the surrounding, guilt brightly sparkling on our visages without pardon we step on one another. Our beautiful, merry and precious planet loosing its sense of beauty in an inadequate manner but still we cannot see what our lives are seeking for. We need love and understanding we need one another for a better living. Let’s start from a good angle to land on a better scale it’s for our own benefit…The world is our world but does not belong to us, as we are here for a reason to also always have in mind that we all going to depart one day. What’s the hatred for those it worth it? Literately lost and mislead but physically hurt, its see able that we are leading our lives to what we don’t want hurting one another for no basic reason. It’s seen at a certain point that we sometimes wished to know how is it like after life but the reality is death

The ways of life are beyond the sound of the tongue, harder and softer than what is seen and felt. Life took its birth through pain It’s the pain, which gave birth to beautiful  creations. Life is incomplete, without the pain since, the pain teaches to actually accept, the pain with a joy as the longer we deny the existence of pain, love shall not behold. depressing it is, to deny existence of pain as the pain actually gave birth to life. Life, which is in a soul, comes through pain and agony , which is the true meaning of life. What we feel is not what we know and what we know endured to what is to come.

Sad it is that nothing seems right but why? once memories of the past sorrowful invade. When it all retaliated to nightmares and hollow, just then when the sound rhythm to a melody of nausea. Reality, justice, happy living known spoken but not valued. Too much expectation can lead to self-destruction, vandalism, greed and temptations. Life is a lession to be learned, as love implies.

In belief that religion took stand in order to complete missing pieces of all acts towards faith for worship of anything that was considered superior to understand. The belief of a religion consisted of trying to appease and show royalty to the Supreme Being. This resulted in performing rituals and keeping traditions to earn goodness. Such has been maintained to establish courage in result towards self-confidence. Today as we are still on the merge of our great ancestors these has become a chronicle that we have learned to respect and follow throughout our livings. Which moralities appeal the governing of human affairs. We have pledge to its Conscientiousness in order to show respect to its origins. This as well signifies a particular clan that shares one mind towards their belief. Humanity found its stand. 
 .    




Details | Rhyme | |

Durgs And Sex Or Jesus Christ

Drugs And Sex?  Or Jesus Christ?

Why do many talk about drugs and sex?  But not Jesus Christ?
It’s almost like many live in bondage, at a cheap price!

Is there anyone who’ll choose to live
 for the King of Kings?
And experience what everlasting life can really bring?

Tell me…  Is a life of drugs and sex 
the “ultimate goal?”
To love a life of addictions 
and heartaches to the soul?

When it comes to the power of Jesus Christ… 
 He stands alone!
Only he has the power to heal your life and home!

Only he can restore the emptiness, 
that drugs and sex leave behind!
And only he can bring a complete healing
 to the troubled mind!

He can restore anything in a life, 
that drugs and sex have taken!
With him as Lord….  There’s no one who’s ever forsaken!

Won’t you take the time, to open up your heart and receive him?
He offers a life filled with hope and joy!
Won’t you believe him?

Behold!  The glory of Jesus Christ! 
 A wondrous savior to behold!
He brings life eternal!  More precious than silver or gold!

Hallelujah!  The majesty of Jesus! He can set you free!
He offers true peace and joy!  
And a life for all eternity!

By Jim Pemberton    02/09/13


Details | I do not know? | |

Welcome 2013

Well we are already a couple of months in so i just wanted to say welcome. 
this will be a new journey for the both of us, so i hope it will be awesome. 
I will try to write more than usual this year, I promise. :)
What would help tho if you readers would send me topics and stuff to help me write about things cuz my mind goes way faster than my fingers and i cant think of just one thing. lol. so thank you readers. plz comment and tell me your thoughts.


Details | Villanelle | |

The Ending Yet Not

The time has came to an end,
My heart is beating fast,
I want to embrace you,
For ever you shall be mine.

Why is love so hard?
My tears fall and fall,
Memories will remain in my mind,
I don't like this ending,
I wanted happy ending.

All I wanted is a small house,
With a happy family,
I wanted to be what I didn't,
See with my parents.

God why is he fading off,
He is everything I got!
I searched hard,
To find the one I want.

I feel rushed to obtain my mind,
The words just keep on,
Coming in rush,
As if you are leaving,
At this moment and on,

I want to talk to my best friend,
To look in your eyes is hard,
My emotions run,
My tears cant stop!

To say goodbye is hard,
To have no one to turn to,
When I am happy and sad,
When you are alone,
I want to be by your side,
Every where you go,
I want to be there with,

My heart has the deepest cut,
I want you to be close to me,
Like we were before,
I feel angry with God!!
Why are you leaving me?

This isn't the vision I had in mind,
Best friends and lovers forever apart,
I wanted you to be the one,
To hold my hand and get married.


Details | Free verse | |

Hope

The phone rings innocently.
Who is at the other side?
Could be no one then yet a peculiar feeling tells
me it is the bearer of bad news.
Still I answer hoping I am wrong.
My mother is ill, trapped between two worlds; 
the worlds of fear and courage.
My ears hear every word but my mind has created a 
sudden barrier that nothing seems to
penetrate like some sort of
steel web of unwanted denial.
Fear floods my body like a torrent
river flow, eroding strength
and stability.
How much longer can I bare it?
Never it seems but hope still glimmers 
regardless of how dim.
Miles are between us, 
I feel numb and unexpectedly lost.
Where am I?
It’s certainly not here in the presence 
of fallen angels.
The bell of hope strikes a sharp note creating a 
gentle chime awaking my
senses to the news,
they are sharpened making
the fear of loss suddenly
commanding, corrupting my
inner strength making it weak.
I continue to listen all the 
while my body is screaming
in protest.
The voice stopped, I hung up,
the pain and fear never lessened.
Time went by all the while my
mind was constantly in a state
of anguish and grief.
Endless stories were created,
each one worse than the last.
My family begun to shatter like
a broken mirror, reflecting only
the scars of misery and needless
hurt.
Hope still glimmered but appeared
distant and out of reach.
My mind grew tender, endless misery
has eaten away at my last thoughts
of happiness.
The sting of fear created heartache
for the bond between mother and child
was nearly severed,
severed by the hands of
an unwanted deity.
A deity of life itself.



Details | Rhyme | |

The Little Girl with Pigtails

She’s the little girl with pigtails,
who sits quietly at her desk.
Whose eyes lift to meet no one,
whose clothing is always a mess.

He’s the little boy on the playground,
whose strays alone without a friend.
Whose countless cuts and bruises,
are too deep for those to mend.

She’s the little girl in the lunch line,
who stares at classmates having fun.
Her mouth never forms a smile,
her long sleeves cover what’s been done.

He’s the little boy, who lashes out in anger,
as his classmates stop and stare,
in wonder at the skeptical, of a little boy
who seldom had a word to share.

She’s the little girl who recites excuses,
for every injury her tiny body may bear.
A rehearsed story told so perfectly,
no one notices the blankness within her stare.

He’s the little boy who startles so easily,
and jumps at the loudest sound.
A little boy covered in shades of blue,
inflicted by an abuser his fate is bound. 

She’s the little girl with pigtails,
she sits alone, without a friend to tend,
a black tinted heart of abusiveness,
hidden injuries never to mend.

They were the little boy and girl in the classroom,
who sat quietly alone, concealing the crime,
of living a life-time at the hands of an abuser,
who raised their hands of abuse one last time.


Details | Nonet | |

May I Ask Your Name, Please

~~

An old face looks into a mirror,
the confusion floats over her,
struggling with her memory.
Who are you she wonders?
I am a young girl,
just seventeen,
this summer!
See my,
dress!

It is pink and frilly and pretty,
mother made it for my party!
She smiles at the reflection,
but it fades and withers,
leaving an old face.
Oh hello dear!
May I ask,
your name,
please?


________________________________

October 17, 2013


Nonet x2


Written for the contest, Nonet, theme Old Age, Dr. Ram Mehta


Details | Rhyme | |

I Went To Church Last Sunday


I Went To Church Last Sunday… I went to church last Sunday, and much to my surprise. I got up real early. It was just before the sunrise. I wanted to be with others in worship to my Lord. But when I arrived, so many there look so “bored.” When they were singing the songs, some didn’t seem to care. As I looked around, hardly anyone noticed I was there. By the time the people were asked to sing another song. Some greeted the worship leader with just another “yawn.” Did anyone really want to worship Jesus the risen king? Is church a place to simply “get bored with everything?” As the preacher arose to preach his “Sunday sermon best.” “Fill between the lines,” he said… This was to be the “test.” Shortly after the outlines were filled, there was a “closing prayer.” I noticed many of the people were “happy to get out of there!” I thought to myself as I left and walked out the door… “Is this what the true body of Christ meant for?” “Where is the sin-cleansing power of God I’ve heard about?” “Has the power of God in many churches been ‘kicked out?’” I pray that the presence of God will get a hold of our heart. May our worship for Jesus be evident… Right from the start! May our relationship with Christ be very important to us. May we give him our life! Our heart! And our trust! May our love for him not be a “boring Sunday experience.” May we serve HIM daily… Expecting a divine appearance! The Jesus I know is bigger than any denomination might be! And only his blood has the power to set men free! Serving and loving Jesus is an opportunity with living! A life in totally surrender to Christ is what we much be giving! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Senryu | |

Liar Liar Pants On Fire

<                              the great ....  deceiver
                                practices artful ....  falsehood  
                                bold .... assumptions


Details | Alliteration | |

Wasteland of Shame

Bound by blame, broken by blight,
Scarred by a stolen satire,
nuzzling necrophiliacs within the night.

Tangled in torment, tied untamed,
blemished by the blasphemy,
of never speaking your name.

Shackled in sin, shredded sovereignty,
dealing death’s doses,
murdering you and me.

Cuffed with candor, calling our crimes,
to an impetuous enslavement,
tortured through time.

Set me free, to flee this fool’s game,
where we're always left wandering,
in this wasteland of shame.


Details | I do not know? | |

Let's Get Lost

She was a 10 years old
When her life was sold
He hurt her in ways unimaginable
He may have not have been her father
But he was her brothers
He told the 10 year old to get in the bed
Or something would happen to her 1 month brother
The bed was cold
The springs were rusted
Her heart was always filled with love and care
But after that night
She wouldn't dare share
The 10 year old went to school the next day
Without anything to say
Her friends found out
And shunned her out
She told an      
The police were called
She was taken from her mother
Who at that time wouldn't believe her
She stayed at a family members house
A couple days went by
Then she was returned home
The bad guy was found
She still has nightmares to this day
And she has this to say:
"I'm sorry for doing what I knew was wrong
All I wanted was for my brother to be safe."


This is a true story, It's MY story. I hope that all you readers unerstand that I still blame 
myself for what happened that night. I DON'T want your sympathy, I just need friends who 
actually care. Thank You For Reading Let's Get Lost. . . . . .


Details | Free verse | |

Words of Life

Drowning in the pool of anguish…oh…oh…
I’m venturing into the forest…and I want to hear the words seep out 
Release these aching sorrows…I worry my soul’s drying out…
like a drought…
Drain out the fluids from my heart
It’s gouging me…bruising me to the core…

**chorus** 
Embrace the light…embrace the midnight sky…
You fall in my arms – you die so warm
Shed me more sun to lift up my spirits
From the…underground…and release me – I’m breathless
I’m drowning in doubt…ooh… oh… 


Remember me…I’m falling…into my swirling fate…hanging on the roots 
Strangling my heart…distorting in my veins… I’m bleeding so softly – cut out the wood…
Splintering me…I’m shattering… and I’m falling in the abyss
Bring me more radiance from my candle light
Warp me up in bliss…don’t let the midnight sky…don’t take away my delight
From the…ocean…and save me—save me…oh… oh…  I’m failing 

*chorus*

I’m drowning in regret…ooh..oh…
Hit the bull’s eye in my heart…embrace the light
And don’t leave me hanging in the abyss…hand me a kite!
Save me before I fall apart…shut out the night
And don’t let the dusk escape us…

I must confess…
I must confess…
I hate to see you abandon the light…
But I’m not the one to save you from the night
Ooh…ohh…

*Chorus* 

Splintering lies fill your heart 
I want to kiss it goodbye…
But you’ve mastered it like a piece of art
I want to kiss the abyss and die…
Dry… I wanna touch the sky with my whole soul
But I’m failing and the end of time has taken its toll
Tainted sorrow…swims around me…I dwell where the waters depart
But the anguish still swarms in my heart…
I’m failing…my heart stops beating
And my desires are fleeting
From my grasp
And the monsters laugh at me…as I fall… 

*chorus*

Embrace the midnight sky…catch me…catch me…
As I fall in death’s arms…I die so cold
And your heart is made of gold

Untangle the darkness & take away the nightmares 
Answer our prayers & block out the night 
Erase the heartaches & wipe away our tears
Unravel Your words of life & delight


Details | Epitaph | |

OLD GIRLFRIEND

    OLD GIRLFRIEND
Remember me as one who's told
your life as you are growing old,
before your time to be
what only I can see,
alone and empty, bare and cold.
     © ron wilson


Details | Rhyme | |

THE NEIGHBORHOOD NEXT TO MINE

The neighborhood next to mine
Oh, to see it.. it's mighty fine
Their houses aren't made with stick
They're ornate with beautiful brick
Sidewalks proudly mark their way
No overgrown ditch made of clay
Streetlights line their paved paths
Not a single pothole do they have
No better place you could ever find
The neighborhood next to mine

*In my early childhood my family of 9 was very poor and I wondered why we had to live in the "dark neighborhood" without street lights.  By the time I was a teenager my family was affluent.  But I never forgot the dark neighborhood, the best friends in the world, and being grateful for every blessing that comes my way!

Date: 9-12-14


Details | Rhyme | |

You Are Valuable To God


You’re Valuable To God! You‘re valuable to God! He gave you his best! You can enjoy his love, peace and rest! You‘re valuable to Jesus! He bled and died… He sacrificed his life for you, and was crucified! You’re valuable! You were bought with the Lord’s blood. Everything he’s given to you is because of his love! You’re valuable to God, and so wonderfully made! A way to get to heaven has already been paid! You’re valuable and precious! One of a kind! When God created this world. He had YOU in mind! You’re valuable to the lord! He wants you to know… Not all of the world’s money can purchase your soul! You’re valuable to God! He offers his salvation. You can enjoy his peace and sanctification! You’re valuable to God! Won’t you come to him? And experience his love, and the forgiveness of sin? God offers to you eternal life that’s precious! He speaks to you from a heart of mercy and kindness! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

THE LIGHTING

Eagle-Sea -- Hope, the long Wave--
Slow -- to the Acorn --
From where Million goodbyes
As the best deflowered Drive --
Deep in and out -- 
It's impossible I meet!

I read your long letters --
Breathed --Organic glory --
Sublime ecstasies --they are all your flesh --
Chanted -- the perpetual
Revolution of that Dips!

Let me not to be ashamed
By saying, "They shake me sexually" --
I could not know
How departures I have --
All flocked me away!


Details | Diminished Hexaverse | |

The Universal Question (for ^Rick Parise's 'The Universe' contest)

The Universal Question
(9.7.10) 

What is all of this?
When did this happen?
How did I get here?
Where did I come from?
Who am I asking?

What should I do?
When will I know?
How can I tell?
Where do I go?

Who am I?
What are you?
When are we?

Above
all else,

Why?


Details | Lyric | |

In my corrupt stead

Draped from her body, they sparkle like gold. Tear soaked and smothered, in lies that she's told. She wears them ashamed, but she wears them with grace. To cover the pain, that is etched in her face. 
  It's her mark, it's her passion, her reason to breathe. As shallow and weak, as pathetic can be. 
  For the last time I saw her, was the last place she laid. Where I held her so close, deep down in her grave. No more to be seen, no more to betray. Damned and unheard, while she cried out in vain. 

Don't pity the evil, corrupt and forsaken. Who've strayed from the path, that they should have taken. It's all self inflicted, they live unrestricted. But on this their last day, they'll all be convicted. 

Etched in his body, the scars will remain. Blood soaked in madness, he's nearly insane. He wears them in anger, but he wears them with pride. To expose to the world, all his hate that's inside. 
  It's his mark, it's his passion, his reason to breathe. As shallow and weak, as cruel as can be. 
  But the last place I saw him, was the last time he raged. Where I beat him and broke him, deep down in his grave. No more to be seen, no more to be heard. Damned and destroyed, underneath all his dirt. 

Don't pity the evil, corrupt and forsaken. Who've strayed from the path, that they should have taken. It's all self inflicted, they live unrestricted. But on this their last day, they'll all be convicted.

Now sift through my ashes, gather up all my bones. Let him without sin, cast the first stone. Pile me up in a bucket, and leave me to stay. So I can face my creator, on my judgement day. 
 It's my life, it's my passion, it's what I believe. As misunderstood, as reckless can be. 
  For the last time you saw me, was the last time I prayed. Where I dug my own hole, and laid down in my grave. No more to be hated, no more to be feared. For in my corrupt stead, an angel appeared. 


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: IV

God made all people
But some better than others?
Stop being silly.


Details | Ballade | |

She worries so much

She worry’s so much

She worries in case he’ll leave her
In her crazy kind of mind
Old memories they haunt her
And now they’ve made her blind
She does not see reality
She’s living in a dream
She’s built herself a nightmare
It’s just the way it seems.

She doesn’t see him laughing
And singing all the time
And how he is so loveable
And writes her lovely rhymes
How he cares so much when she is down
She never see those things
She sees the horror in her mind
That her thoughts so often bring.

When will she ever see him?
The way he really is
He’s wrote five thousand poems for her
All filled with loves sweet bliss
But is it not too late for her
When she lives back in the past
The damage done by foolish acts
It be so very vast

23 July 2013 @ 1250hrs






Details | Senryu | |

The Poetess

.

                                        Writing her great pearls
                                        Worn with pride everyday
                                        But shown clasp broken


Details | Rhyme | |

Runaway mother

A woman, a mother
as a little girl
she couldn't wait to become
But its gotten to hard now 
back to a little girl
she wants to run


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Date Rape

I am a victim, never thought I would but I was I said it would never happen to me 
but I 
was SO wrong what turned out a be an innocent fun turn out to be the worst day 
of my 
life now that it's done there's nothing I can do but warn you to be carefully of the 
people you hang around, and the worse part about it is he still out there doing the 
same 
thing to some other girl because I never told anyone what happened to me; 
devastated by 
the fact that it was by one of my own best friends I thought I could trust. Nine 
months 
and a child to take of for eighteen years, eighteen years that I'll miss out on like 
my 
prom and ever other thing a teenage girl would do who would've known my drink 
was drugged 
and who would've guessed one of my own friends would betray me. Now I have 
no trust and 
scared to death for the rest of my life believing it might happen again and I'm one 
of 
the many statistic of more than one hundred girl's that was date raped.


Details | Rhyme | |

There's A Lot In Life, That I Don't Understand


There’s a lot in life, that I don’t understand! And a lot of wickedness throughout this land! A lot of heartache and misery, is what I’m seeing! Any kind of commitment, seems to be disappearing! Being faithful to anything, seems to be of the past. My lives seem to be falling apart… And fast! Any principles of Godly living, seem to be ignored. So many appear to be, “complacent and bored.” I often wonder what God must be thinking. When it seems like this whole world is “sinking!” I’ve decided to come to Jesus! And really pray! That people will really listen to what God has to say! “What shall the righteous do, if the foundations are destroyed?” Very soon, many of our “freedoms,” will not be enjoyed! Please, dear Jesus, come and heal our broken nation! Help us all to confess our sins! And accept your salvation! Please come and bring your peace and love within! That we may seek the living God! Once again! God is our only hope! It’s in him, that we’re strong! It’s in his arms of mercy, that we all belong! Please God… Come and touch us with your healing! It’s only in you, that we have a true meaning! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

The River home

It was a home on the river we lived .
It was the ghost of a young man whom had taken his own life.

I still remember the vision of him walking by me with a blank stare 
We,  as a Family of  seven , moved into this river house 
Panoramic views right out to the river , I should mention

I was home alone as a child , looking out at "The Julia Belle Swan " as she went by .
Upstairs in that room as I saw a figure walking by , with very nice features , auburn hair 
I thought he was my older brother , a handsome young guy 

Then I realized the young man was not my brother , a  apparition he appeared .
He was not there to scare or frighten , 
the message I believe he wanted to shed light on, so clear.

He walked right by ,then disappeared through the window, out to the River .

The Ghost knew I could see him , a gift I have been given
when I was a younger child of five , I had once died for a short time. I was lifted by Jesus in Heaven . Death is not for us to decide .

Later in the years we moved from that home , every home we lived in had a story 
or a presence of its own . My Mother had told me later , a young man took his life there .

 Keep fighting your way through life and its despair , 
you are important to someone whom cares .  If you feel alone and want life to end , Please pick up the phone , call anyone ,  call for help , call a Friend .

"This is not fiction , it truly is a gift I have been given "


Details | Lyric | |

It's Not Over

Don’t say it’s all over (cause it’s not)
“Sorry” won’t cover it…so don’t go on your knees and pray for my forgiveness 
Oh baby…don’t listen to the commotion…I’m done taking cover (it’s all for naught)
I’m plummeting in slow motion…into the remorseful pit…I’m plummeting in my nightmare’s abyss

I want to carry you through the night… 
I’m swimming in the ocean of my tears… 
My sodden wings lost its ability of flight…
You've been swimming in your distress for years… 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

I want to remind you to fight the good fight…
My misery pools are brewing inside of my head…
I’m backing away from the light & exploring the night… 
You’re giving in to sleep and I’m wide awake on my bed 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

Please don’t tell me…oh, don’t tell me…darling!
You’re giving up today… (I beg you to stay, despite your inner pain) 
I’m scared I might erupt – it could be quite startling!
Someday, things will change for the better… (Don’t turn the wrong lane)
I’m waiting for that day to arrive – perhaps it will wash away our dismay…

I promise you a tranquil reality 
I want to stray with you tonight 
I still have hope that He’ll set us free
I was wondering if you could stay the night
Maybe the Lord could grant us 
Pure, incredible delight 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we've plunged into our own pit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to gather…


Details | Light Poetry | |

A Battle Of Resistance, Will And Compromise

Here I am, standing all alone feeling so isolated, depressed and lonely. The serenity around me is void of Life and Hope and vacuum occupied both sides of me. All these condemned me to the feeling of uncertainty. I just walked on without making a decision, and what I see in front is different from my behind like two distinct worlds but having one motive one rejecting me and the other embracing me by all means. The one in front was totally enveloped by total darkness and I was so blind to the point I cannot see myself. All I felt was doom and extinction and this feeling grew stronger the more I stare. Full of fear I turned back to the other world. The elements of Nature were in weird exhibition. The Dark-red Sun, emitting melting fire, and space coloured in a Purple-Orange mixture. Brown Rocks gushed out Silvery water, Large and bottomless Pot Holes as wide as Nations existed and filled the Earth as though the aftermath of the end of age. Different questions and scenarios flooded my mind my complex feelings, combined by all negatives, helplessness and hopelessness already weighing me down and worst of all guilt was making me want to explode. I focused more, down one hole and was raged on a girl been raped, felt intense shame as Divorced Parents neglected their innocent Kids sympathy overtook my being as children die of Poverty. Not taking this anymore, I searched for a better alternative. The second Pit showed no sign of peace, I felt humiliated at the killings and wars, the slavery to Drinking disgusted me, the sexual adventure with Animals insulted me and the rampant dirty Politics embarrassed me. Of course! This is also not a place to be. My mind is now made up to turn back to darkness as I did, an endless Bridge appeared. I walked through it with ease and Pleasure and a force behind me ensured I never turned back. With my destination unknown, I resisted strongly, then I realized the Bridge was closing up from behind. This definitely indicates a Journey never to return and seems to be the road to my slaughter. With my maximum resistant force, I ran back and just at the end point of its closure, I jumped swiftly with my eyes closing in reflex. Opening it, I found myself lying in a Room, very weak and in white clothing surrounded by heavy electronic gadgets and disturbed by computerized simulated sounds. Even with a blurred sight, I tried to figure out where I am then I noticed a woman in white as she screams "She is alive!"


Details | Limerick | |

Plain Computer Talk

”. Errors, error, press on “any key
Yes our minds are a clutter you see.
I told you what to do.
Now you are turning blue.
No” any key” shows itself to me.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Depression

          Depression

       Why do I feel like this inside?
Why do I keep all my tears inside?
        Why can't I just fit in?
   To belong to a world,that will except me for whom I am within.
      Why is it so hard to say "I can"?
       Is it because my mind is always in la la land?
    I can't really help the things I do,
I'm mad at the world for what I'v been through.
  No one can seem to understand, that I am what I am!
    I know that I have plenty of disability,
that keeps me from being the person I want to be.
    It hold me back from the things I want out of life.
   I just can't seem to get things right.
    It's so hard for me to see my inner beauty,
when I feel like the world is out to get me!
    I don't want to feel so isolated within,
            I just can't let you in.
      Stop telling me that it's going to be ok.
    You don't know what goes on in my mind,
  and why It's keeps taking me back in time.
  Replaying all the things that happend in my life,
    like I'm a walking recorder device.
      I just can't grasp the real meaning of life.
 I just can't mange to make mine right!
 Why can't I just get over the pain?
To move on, and get away from the past that keeps holding me back.
  I want to feel loved, for who I am.
 That they loved me for me, and not what they want me to be!
I know who I am, I am what you see.
   I can' comperehend sometimes, I can't seem to take things in.
I'm mad at myself, because I'm lost within....
      This is what you call depression!


Details | Rhyme | |

Just When It Seems Like Life Is Overwhelming

Just When It Seems Like Life Is Overwhelming! Just when it seems like I’ve faced my darkest night… And things in life, aren’t turning out right… This is about the time, when things are falling apart! And I began to feel a lot of stress in my heart! I run to Jesus! I know that he wants to help me! He’s always here! And promises to never leave me! He sees me, and speaks words of comfort, to follow! He reminds me, that he’ll take care of today and tomorrow! He lets me know that he won’t let go of my hand! Everything I’m going through… He understands! He turns back all of the problems that are overwhelming! And I see what things my life, are becoming! I have fellowship with Jesus! Like I never had before! He’s given to me peace and hope! And much more! I’m glad I have such a wonderful friend like this! His love and joy… I don’t want to miss! Thank you Jesus! For turning my life around! And for plating my life on a solid ground! You’re all I want! And all that I’ve needed! With you as my Lord! My life has been completed! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Couplet | |

Where does the Time go

I feel as though time is slipping away,
And more is gone each passing day…


Details | I do not know? | |

Why Are Church Doors Locked

WHY ARE CHURCH DOORS LOCKED?

I have been a member for many years. I attend when ever I can.  I pray and pay.
I guess, I took it for granted, but not anymore. I must stand up for all that want to know.  For all that need to know. No! I am not a  hero, but I would like to know. 

There was a time in my youth, when it was un-thinkable to lock a church door. Did congress pass a law, while I was sleeping?  Should I call the sheriff?  Why didn’t the pastor tell me?  Does he know? Did he lock the front door, side door, and even the back door? Does God know, the doors at the church are locked?  Saints, we are in big trouble.

Okay! Let’s get serious. Are you trying to keep something locked out? Are you trying to keep something locked in? This could be a sin. There are two individuals in the congregation that I can ask.  They certainly must know answer. After all, their name is Brother Lock and Brother Smith. Yes! The Lock Smith Brothers. 

Now if the Devil is locked up, when I leave church, I’m okay with that. You say, I should not worry about this.  Well! It is now at the top my list. I want to know more. It’s time to stop church crime.  

Dr. "G"


Details | I do not know? | |

Ice And Snow

When the cold winds blow

It can freeze your soul

The feel of ice in your veins

Hoping you can unthaw again

When the snow storm is strong and you can't see

When life is mixed up how can it be

The wind and ice strong and cold

Like the sorrows we behold

The unthawing of the snow

Is like the unthawing of the soul

Each little snowfake of our life

Make up some of our sorrow and strife

So as the drops melt away

And the ice can no longer stay

Let the winds blow our sorrow

Into a new tomorrow


Details | Rhyme | |

A New Pair of Glasses

Reflecting back on all the times we felt, that life had done us wrong, The daily struggles, the missing pieces, the days they felt so long. Without the hope inside sometimes, that life could ever change, Until one day, the lightening hit, we felt its stinging pain. Alone we were and full of fear, we sat and sometimes cried. Until we were willing, to let someone in and put aside our pride. “It’s an inside job, but let it all out", we once heard someone say. It’s up to you to make the choice, so start anew today! The daily decision to change our thoughts and all our actions too, Is not an easy task, but we’ll find our bonding glue. Not sure exactly where we’re headed, we just swiftly plod away. Remembering who we want to become, lies in our choices today. If life gets rough, just phone a friend, or take a walk outside. Breathe in fresh air and think good thoughts, and put your cares aside. Just one foot forward is all it takes to get to where He’s calling! The path is outlined for us as we go, He’ll catch you when you’re falling. Tears may come from time to time, and that’s ok, you know. For in our quest for what’s to come, they’ll be sure to help you grow. No pain, no gain we hear, but here’s the best news yet…… We’re promised a life we’d never dreamed that alone we would never get! With the laughter we’ll share, and the friends we will meet, our fears will melt away. Our gratitude for the new life we’re living will shine with each new day. A simple change in attitude will help throughout the years. Life will become like a new pair of glasses, We’ll see laughter through the tears!


Details | Blank verse | |

Loves Breach

“Tis pain not concern, life in earth hath become off as vague scorn. 
      The poison of asp drips ahead of her tongue…her honeycomb hath dried… 

       Life sourest as wine gone wild of natural fermenting, 
       wrong of love she chose extreme delusion ere her love of truth. 
       Loose the yoke, chaotic, psychosis, strife let life's people renew.”


Details | Haiku | |

The value of time

over 50's;  when a bed stops you to support sleep longer.
when your body stops you to eat stronger,
when medications stop you to drink alcohol,
when Dr. advises you to stop smoking if you live longer,
you know the time when value becomes a tease monger.


Details | I do not know? | |

If your not the part of the solution your the part of the problem

I’m from the hood where the politicians don’t do squat for the poor/  
I represent the modern day Black man/ 
The Black educated politician and activist that care about only one Damn 
thing when the stuff hit the fan! 
“They Damn Self!” 
It’s like a wise man once said “Never let the left hand know what the right 
hand do” meaning keep all of the right hands right and all of the left hands 
left/ 
Ever since then the tradition has been eating off the next mans death/ 
It’s like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder whether I should go buy 
books or go buy a T.V,/Then again I wonder what’s wrong with these rap artists calling us
window 
shoppers like we nothing!  
Then them same rap artist turn around and beg us to go buy they C.D/ 
“Buy Black Owned!!” 
“Keep the Money in the Hood!” 
That’s all you hear/ 
We tried and it went/ 
Now at the same time I’m behind in my rent/ 
I hate the usage of the word Negroes! 
But when I look at these new condos being built all around Harlem/ 
I realize Negroes got a problem/ The rent not affordable/  
They go do what they wanna do/ just to get Negroes out of Harlem/ 
What happened to all the great MALCOLMS, MARTINS, and MARCUS/ 
Cause all we got now is a bunch of fake FARRAKHANS, SHARPTONS 
and BARRAKAS!/ nah just kidding!Hopefully not my last hope BARAK 
OBAMA! But I wonder when it’s all go stop!/ 
Cause when I look at my peoples now a days/ 
All I see is  
“I see DISASTER!! 
And realize “Yeah we still SLAVES”/ 
But the sad part is 
WE THE MASTER!!     (“let’s stop enslaving our selves”)  
By Lester Marrow


Details | Choka | |

The Road not Traveled

Walking upon the road
That seems to lead nowhere clear
Day or night, no difference
Their sense, gone, alone.

Not so long ago,
There was music in the air
Their was a dance in my step
I wasn't alone.

I walked with my love
There was sunshine in the air
Fragrance, sweet to the senses
Then it was no more.

All was gone like smoke
Upon a road that goes on
But where it leads, I care not
And I stopped my walk.

Sudden presence close
A faint light dances nearby
Looked up to see the moon    
That speaks to my soul.

Lingers, its soft glow
Urging me to move onward
Upon the road not traveled
Soon, where, it will show.

A new place to go
And I can walk with a song
Day or night, no difference
My soul now aglow.

Copyright © 06.15.10


Details | Free verse | |

This Whim Called Love

I breathe in ardor!
I grapple in passion!
...but of this whim called….love?
I am unacquainted


Details | Rhyme | |

Is There A Moral foundation In Your Life Today


Very seldom do I hear any complaints. Regarding the lacking of moral restraints. It seems like many are under some kind of a "spell." What's right or wrong? Many can't even tell! Where are the moral leaders this nation needs? As the heart of this nation continually bleeds. Many chuches provide very little discretion. Pretending to be "Godly" ... yet no moral direction. No wonder many people don't know what to believe. A lifestyle of lying, drugs and sex is what they achieve. In their lives, they have no "moral boundary." Many carrying a load of "dirty laundry." To those of you who want satisfaction and victory too... There is a "moral compass" that's freely offered to you! This "moral compass," is God's word...a solid foundation! Which speaks of HIS love and his gift of salvation! If your life is filled with hurt, and has no true meaning. It's in the direction of Jesus you need to be leaning! You don't have to live in despair and defeat. Jesus' grace and love will make your life complete! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Monorhyme | |

5 W's

Who can solve Math word problems and equations? What are the simplest and best solutions? When life gets tough and you’re in great confusion, Where are your patience and determination? Why not make life so easy at state of convolution?
Written: Aug. 27,2012


Details | Acrostic | |

The Gulf Oil Spill

Gulf oil spilled
Useless big waste
Lives were taken
Foolish mistake

Oil will spew
In such turmoil
Loss no one knew

So much damage
People showed care
Invading land
Like a nightmare
Let’s clean this up!


Details | Rhyme | |

We're Just Sinful Human Beings

We’re Just Sinful Human Beings! All of us are just sinful human beings! Scripture says; “the heart is sinful above everything!” Even if we try to hide and wash our sins away… Wickedness in our heart, is there, each day! God made Adam and Eve, with perfection! But sin crept in, like a deep and wicked infection! He put them in the Garden of Eden with a choice. It was up to them to listen to his voice. They had all they could want, with one instruction. Disobeying this, would lead to their destruction. Satan took the form of a snake to tempt their mind. And their disobedience affected all of mankind! Since that time, mankind has needed atonement! Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse you! This very moment! Only his blood can wash away sin’s dark stain! It can only be found when one calls on Jesus’ name! We’ve all sinned and fallen short of God’s glory! But wait! This doesn’t have to be the end of the story! God and all of his angels in heaven, are waiting for YOU! The love and blood of Jesus, can make you BRAND NEW! His love, for our sins, is what he offers in exchange! You can be forgiven! And forever totally changed! This opportunity is for you, to reach out and take! Won’t you do it now? For eternity’s sake??? By Jim Pemberton


Details | Couplet | |

Squares

Busy square around me sucking me inside
Keeping me from seeing what's on the outside
Building shell surrounds me squared off like a hide
Standing on a corner; a square; a block; that's wide

Quilted district patterns are mapped across the land
while larger squares protruding shows zoning had a hand
Suburbs of the city squaring boundaries they have spanned
When all that's left are gullies squared by nature that are fanned.


Details | Couplet | |

Occupy's Struggle

Still angry from revolutions long past
Greed wondered how long it would last

The occupy people have been asleep
Their eyes closed not making a peep

Now awaken they look at privation
Asking what's happen to their nation

Progress was not suppose to add more
For all of those who are money's whore

The plan was suppose to provide enough
For those struggling in life finding it tough

Wondering if it's too late to escape their fate
Revolution or Armageddon may be on the plate

Now for occupy to really develop and grow
They will need to find new ways not to owe

Edward J Ebbs - 11/06/11


Details | Rhyme | |

Living debate

Today I thought of all my stress
Causing me such an unrest
So much to think that I had thought
Would it be better to live or not?

Get this straight: I'm no cutter
No pill taker; def. not a jumper
I'm not killing myself- get that straight
Just explaining today's living debate

I hate the fact I suck at school
No discipline in me for easy rules
'Do the work, earn good grades'
I failed to do so; a whole year fades

My freshman year; man I $*#%ed up
Too much partying, boys and stuff
Taken for granted just how hard
Barely passing for my report card

I ruled today I just must live
My life, to the fullest, and to give
Back to all who help me to stay
Family, friends, defining me to claim nay.

Nay, I will never end early my years
Selfish would it be; no other word more clear
For people who care and have to deal
If I were gone; their lifelong empty feel

Not being conceded; I'm not all that
I just couldn't ever leave someone like that
Abandonment, giving up, not me
I'll fight this challenge to get off AP*

Staying in school's now my number one
Everything comes second; last listed is 'Fun'
Focus on completing the work I need
Will help me cope with getting degree'd

From this message, please take away
The thought to never check out early your stay
Here on this earth, even when you're down
Think of your loved ones who'll always want you around.


*AP: Academic Probation- possibility of removal of university for poor grades


Details | Senryu | |

Tombstone - Like The Four Horsemen

they walked along
weathered, carrying their guns;
like the four horsemen…

down to the O.K.
guns blazing, bullets flying;
smoke clears, the strong stand…


Details | I do not know? | |

No Tears

The music blasts in my ears, Blocks out all around me. 

The screaming, the fighting, the crying, the dying, Some where else never here.

My mind ventures off to the land i created, where i am alone, no one to tell me I'm worth nothing, no one to tell me i do wrong, just me alone.

The sun rises the sun sets, The same routine everyday.

No escaping, No where to go, If there was any hope left, I would not sit here the way I am. 

The happiness is gone, The lights have gone out.

I see the stars come closer, as the world around me slowly disappears, slowly vanishing, disinigrating, evaporating, My spirit is gone.

No one notices, no one cares, as for what i see.

How could my life be different?

I will never know.

If i stayed would things be better? 

No more screams, No more tears, Everything is at peace.


Details | Rhyme | |

The True Meaning of Easter

The True Meaning of Easter! The true meaning of the Easter story, Is God’s Son came down to Earth from glory. Jesus really does love you and me. He was born to die that you might be free. For 33 years, he lived among sinful men. Then one day was to be an atonement for our sin. He who was born of the virgin Mary’s womb. Was to one day rise again from an empty tomb. So many people today have gotten into a bad habit, of replacing Jesus with the bunny rabbit. So please reach out to others and let them know, Of the lover and redeemer of their soul. The true meaning of Easter must forever be said. Of God’s son who died, but arose from the dead! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Epigram | |

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

They say you're pressured 
Into doing it
They say you have
no voice
They say they'll call
you chicken
But me, I chose 
for myself
Though I'm not sayin'
It was the right
choice.


Details | Verse | |

Inevitable Bear

Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?

Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”


Details | Free verse | |

stumped

Have you ever wanted something 
So bad, that in thinking about it,
you feel this huge well of tears rising up?
But you push it down,
pull the plug from the drain…
since you need to be where you are,
but you don’t really want to be there,
just tired.

Need trumping want. 

It’s a bit confusing, actually…
because you, in effect,
become that need,
not necessarily wanted, just needed.

But isn’t being needed,
something we all want?

Or I could be wrong…
not everybody wants to be needed-

Since it can equate to a lifetime
of just giving too much of yourself,
that you run the risk of losing that self,
that you don’t even know 
what you want anymore

Maybe it would also help
if every once in a while,
we acknowledge that 
being wanted is something 
that we also need?

Just to keep us sane, I suppose.

To be needed is too different
from being wanted.

One word is for survival,
while the other is for satisfaction.

So which would you choose to be?




08082011
**this is pretty rough,
just went on a sort of crazy frame of mind here
--as for my title, hmm was just really stumped what to title it?
I guess it also works ;)


Details | Rhyme | |

My Church Forgot Me But Jesus Found Me



My Church Forgot Me… But Jesus Found Me! My first visit to church… I pulled up in my car. I noticed a sign; “we welcome you as you are!” I thought; “how do I come, if I’m not who I am?” I walked to the front door, and shook the usher’s hand. I was later introduced as a visitation guest. The church seemed to rather “happy and blessed.” As many of the people prayed and sang some songs. I went each Sunday and seemed to get along. Something happened and I couldn’t make it on Sunday. Nor could I make to the classes each Wednesday. No one ever called to ask if I was doing o.k. I even left a message and asked the church to pray. As the weeks went by, it seemed like I was forgotten. My whole life came “crashing down,” and hit bottom. It was in these moments, I cried out in pain. Wondering if anyone in heaven knew my name. A close relationship with Christ began to grow. God reached down from heaven knew my name. A close relationship with Christ began to grow. He reached down from heaven and healed my soul! A relationship with Christ is the most important thing. God is bigger than any church and cam do anything! If a church has forgotten you, let me give you a reminder. Christ is all you’ll need! He’s your provider! He can do what no church could ever do! He’ll always be your friend, and will never leave you! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Crown of Sonnets | |

Life's Confusion

I often sat and wondered
Why this superior species suffered
And therefore i somehow discovered
That through the emotions we harboured 
We often find ourselves cornered
With our hearts in the open, uncovered
And found sometimes they differed
These few precious moments that we savoured
But they left our pride un-honoured
While others were left mean tempered
Another group just sat and pondered
Over the life they had been rendered
Some just gave up and surrendered
But life continued to be unhampered


Details | Kyrielle | |

Waste Not, Want Not

Oh, how sad, oh how very glum,
Goodness gracious me prater comes.
Still writing winsome words of woe,
Endlessly stopped, never to go.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

Endlessly stopped, never to go.
Wallowing in morbid abode.
Whiling away the endless hours;
Scribbling sigils, claws cower.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

Scribbling sigils, claws cower.
Feeling your life’s left no dower
Envy those not thus engaged.
Envy the prattle on the page.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

Envy the prattle on the page.
At least the words are given stage.
Each one stroked, petted, tilled and hoed;
Fields upon fields, rows upon row.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

Fields upon fields, rows upon row.
Pondering heaven on life’s gallows.
Goodness gracious me, prater comes,
And, all of it just, so, ho-hum.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

And, all of it just, so, ho-hum.
Leave the box, flee the asylum!
Writing, writing, scratch and scribble;
All this soulless, mindless, drivel.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

All this soulless, mindless, drivel.
joyfull tragic, quite disheveled      
Wading through the endless nights;
Waiting, waiting for the light.
Oh God be, merciful to me.

Waiting, waiting for the light,
Never living your gifted life.
Writing, writing, writing on,
Until the coming of the dawn.
Oh God be, merciful to me.


Details | Rhyme | |

Create In Me A CLEAN Heart

Create In Me A Clean Heart... Create in me a clean heart, Oh God, and renew a right spirit within me. May my flesh be crucified... so that YOU... others may see! Please don't remove from me your presence, or Holy Spirit. May I meditate upon your word... and daily live it! Restore unto me the joy of your salvation... As I serve you with a deep love and appreciation! I will teach sinners, of your wondrous ways. So that they my serve you all of their days! I will shout aloud of your righteousness and proclaim That you have delivered me from all guilt and shame. As my lips are open... I will sing glory & praise to YOU! May you be exalted in all that I say and do. My sacrifice to you are a spirit and heart that's broken. God will not reject me... this he has spoken! May I bring sacrifice and obedience as I come to your altar. You are my solid rock... like the "Rock of Gibraltar!" Thank you for cleansing and making me whole. You brought healing... and restored my soul! By Jim Pemberton Read Psalms 51:10-17


Details | Free verse | |

May 4th

Frustration
Confusion
Panic
Rage
Violance
Death
May 4th is still alive.


Details | I do not know? | |

Do I regret it, regret the decisions?

Do I regret it,
Regret the decisions,
Did I really want to live this life,
Do I want to continue it,
What should I do?

Do I regret,
Regret meeting you,
Did I regret forgiving you so many times,
Times that I was hurt,

Do I regret,
Regret trusting you,
Did I regret trusting you,
Even when I knew the truth,

I regret a lot of things,
yes I'll admit,
But I never regret,
Regret the decisions,
Commitment,
Meeting you,
Trusting you,
Being hurt by you,
Letting you hurt me,
Because I was blinded by love,
In love so deep with you,
But I can see now,
And I will never be hurt,
judged, 
mistreated or anything,
because this is a new me,
A new Vernard Lamar Mays


Details | Free verse | |

Berkeley Politics

The pennies from my pocket
Fall
And turn into the ash in
The cracks along some sidewalk
I have never walked on

In daylight I reflect upon the disappearance
And count on cut out fingers
All the days I spent looking for the copper bits
But
Sometimes when the moon in the mind
Reflects some of the darkness
I only shed light
On the depression of their absence

The reason I am looking
For these few and far pieces
Is to pay the price
Of another man’s ruined glory

To pay the hobo
Leaning on the corner streetlight
He was once the politician
Hoping for change


Details | Free verse | |

A grain of sand to the universe

A tiny, concrete-covered sphere,
floating in an infinity of nothing,
thinking it’s something.


Details | Carpe Diem | |

I

If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.


Details | Alliteration | |

Judgment

What is our purpose?
Why are we here?
Why are we here left in fear shedding all these tears
starring at this demond in this mirrior
blinded by everything I see so clear
where am i going after this life? and is it near?
unanswered questions 
people always always saying swagga shut up stupid clowns 
I see all you frowning behind that fake smile 
I can help all im spreading the word around my town 
to make you turn that frown upside down
they have you in the palm of there hands cant you see it?
If it wasnt for them we wouldnt be asking all these bulls*** questions
and not to mention who are you to be asking me who im reppin
you should get hit in the mouth but
before all that idiotic violence let me talk to you.....
they got you all so corrupt but yall dont know so you dont give a f*** 
they have you like a trout with a kook caught in its mouth some slip and get
away there the lucky ones who can actually say
I have truly been saved
I have to be brave and put up a fight till the end of my days
they say im headed in the wrong direction but thats the governement 
there just like a nasy infection 
theyll always be here picking at your brain saying all the answers are in this certain section
always saying dont use Jesus's name in vain but every king has his rain 
all loss through out years to come its people like me that will put your name to shame
am i satanic NO these are just my devilsh thoughts
theres turning back im self sustained put in this hell knowing very well that i shall rise above all these brainless people that are stuck in this hell get out of that brainwashed shell 
to escape this long life lasting jail not knowing you are rotting in this cell
I really do care about my people
the government they dont there the true definition of evil 
they work for lucifer so they do what they have to, to get thier share 
piece the puzzle and you will find it
Jesus Christ is luccifer he has all you misguided he himself and his dominions where all behind it.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Day My Ego Collapsed

Ego held me, captivated by his good looks,
a sculpted figure that only comes from princes of story books.
Everyday I'd sit and beseech the knowing, wise eyes
of the future, yearning for him to retrieve me from glancing up at skies
I'd never attempted to reach before,
only absorbing the letters of praise he'd send, longing for more,
to elaborate on my looks, manner, and deeds
into an empty heart these comments were received. 
The days retreated; I yearned to move beyond my stagnant state, 
as others chose to participate 
in a place called Life; I hadn't vacationed there
but chose to wait for Ego, or should I dare
to move beyond where he had instructed...
yet he has warned me of sorrows to come if wishes are conducted.
My mail hadn't arrived for countless days, 
as I grew restless, I began to say,
"Save me from this torture of endless bore-
I wish to go beyond the thought of Life that I've been hoping for."
Into the castle a lady entered, appeared bewitched-
coiled in her fingers were the letters I had missed. 
"It is time," she announced, as her free hand grasped my wrist,
upon her breast 'Reason' was pinned, as we began to twist
away from the shattered remains of my glass castle 
as her hair hung before me, in ebony tassels
until a blinding light pierced my eye, 
I tried to free myself from her, shouting goodbye, 
but tears of relief I began to cry...
there stood my lover, my adored, the prince!
One I'd been waiting for, in times such as this. 
Yet the woman pulled me to the face of chiseled marble, with glee 
my lips commenced to kiss him, yet no kiss returned to me...
his mouth, frigid, like the mute,
as his figure remained resolute.
I caressed the shoulders, yet the were of stone,
created by an artist who I despised to the bone.
Reason paused to hand me the letters; I glanced miserably,
discovering the very words had been penned by me.
 I tackled Ego's chest
as it shattered onto wood crest.
Drowned in tears, I glanced up to find
though my eyes seemed blinded, in a bind...
Reason wasn't alone, I thought it was a pun, 
yet this companion seemed to carry the sun,
reaching down with glowing arms to take me in
and help me soar into horizons of Life, where I'd never been.
Thanks to Reason I'd met Light, seeing through the sin 
of vanity, and infectious pride,
due to the collapse of Ego, I remain an unwed bride
to Love, whom I still haven't met,
yet unto Life I remain a pawn, until the end, I am set.


Details | I do not know? | |

Somewhere We Don't Know

Beneath this gloomy sky, I can feel the warmth of that shy sun hiding between the clouds,
while sick breezes of hope ached the loneliness the dwells in the heart, mercilessly
burned the only memory that’s left of tomorrow, and I .. I was just trying to smell the
air of the eclipsed dawn, trying to breathe what is remained to breathe till I cross the
finish line.

And a touch of grief brought tears to the eye, seeing the life that had been shrouded in
somewhere else, oh, what have I missed! What have I missed in this cruel land!

So many joys I saw that never were mine, so many pains that bruised my nights, yet I never
thought they will be mine, and still I yearn for a life I believe exists in somewhere we
don’t know.

And so I closed my eyes beneath the wings of night, departing away, forsaking my deluded
dreams, burying my soul with the ashes of love and life, with all the dust of what is left
behind, sleeping silently as if no one will ever know that I was here in somewhere they
don’t really know.

"I hope you enjoy it :)"
you can find all my writing at my blog website "Echoes"
http://echoes19.wordpress.com/


Details | Lyric | |

I need a friend

I need a friend right now
I need guidance
I need someone to show me how
How to just be.

I thought I was happy
I thought I liked me
I guess I am not the person
I thought I could be. 

I need a friend right now
someone to share my thoughts
someone to be my sounding board
someone who understands me
someone who realizes
I should not be ignored.

I know the truth that lies beneath the beauty and the smiles
I know the truth

But you see,
it is much easier to live a life of denial
You smile and grin,
laugh and pretend.

Oh, but still remains the dark behind the light
I know the truth.

One day the closet door will open
One day the make up will fade
and the world will know 
what I have known all along

You can't hide your pain
you can't store your fears
you can't bury your sorrows
you can't change what's done
you can't pretend your okay anymore
you can't be that person everyone wants you to be

The mask has been ripped from your face
and the world now knows
what I have known all along
you don't know how to live this life alone.
you are broken and scared
and fear that there
is no way for repair

The damage has been done
your life incomplete
you have been stripped
of all your strength and beat
you are left broken and scared
and no one is there.

You are alone 
and I have known this all along
I know the truth
I know I can't be alone

I need a friend right now.


Details | Rhyme | |

Someone Felt Like Giving Up

Someone Felt Like Giving Up! I know someone who wanted to give up. Things in life began to “trip him up.” After much thought and contemplation. He really offered no real explanation. He felt like his life was at a “dead end road.” He said he couldn’t continue with a heavy load. No matter how many different things he tried. He was not happy… Nor satisfied! He began to share a piece of his mind… He was ready to leave everything behind. The choices that he had sometime ago… Began to “wear” at his heart and soul! I tried to encourage him the best I could. But I’m not sure he really understood. As I watched him go his separate way… I said; “there’s something I wanted to say.” “There’s a God who reigns in haven above!” “He wants to fill you with his hope and love!” “He knows and cares about everything you’ll do!” “He’s loving and kind!” “And wants to help YOU!” As I spoke, I could see he thought for a minute. A commitment to God… He decided to give it! He decided to give it all to a God who won’t fail him! He wanted to serve a God, who wants to bless him! He’s happy now that this choice was taken! With Jesus… He’s never alone nor forsaken! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Rhyme | |

I Think About How Ths Country Has Changed



Over the years, I think about how this country has changed.
It’s like “right vs. wrong” has been “rearranged.”

We’re told that a separation from man and God exists.
Yet the handiwork of God is in our very midst!

Rather than seeking to obey God’s word and rules.
Our courts have turned this country into “fools.”

The whole idea of marriage is often very confusing.
Many don’t think about the wrong path they’re choosing!

Government often passes laws that provide a “moral instability.”
We’ve often lost our respect for a Godly type of morality.

As people’s lives get filled with lusts of various kinds.
Many are wandering around with very confused minds!

“One nation under God” is too often under attack.
As this country is quickly “getting off track!”

If “change” is what you want, or what you’re looking for.
Think about the purpose of life you’re meant for!

The direction you need to travel,
 is to the Lord in prayer.
Wherever you are...  
He will meet you there!

Christ alone removes any “God or state” separation.
By his shed blood and his gift of salvation!

There’s no Supreme Court near heaven’s gates!
There’s a God who loves who, and anxiously waits!

He longs for you to receive his life eternal.
So he can put your name in heaven’s journal!

Won’t you allow his love to cleanse you within?
And experience the atonement for every sin!

May the Lord bring to us all a healing and restoration!
He is the only true hope for our great nation!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | Free verse | |

What lies beneath

Linger through the moonlit night
Wear the mask and cease to exist
A face within a swirl of mist
extend my arm and turn my fist
Red rivers flowing through my veins
Yawls for an exit to freedom
Scratching the inner of my skin

The colors of my face drain
By the shrill of trees dwelling within the mist 
Howls of wind stirs the soul with its every spin 

Eyes rolling everywhere with fake smiles and perfection covering their every inch
Lots of copies rule over this world 
A cry of agony screamed my soul 
A yearn for this play to end

A dream of truth
Cast upon the mind
Try to reach a point where every thought is a positive
Until the day we crash
Hoping for a lie to hide our very soul
A simple three words
Everything is okay!
There lies the process that kills us all
Through our soul it winds and steal our mind

Mighty echoes of silent cries 
Rushes through the nights darkness and bitter silence
With the melody of horror
Down on my knees 
With tears flowing with red rivers 
I wailed in pain
I wail in pity
My reflection is my enemy



Details | Concrete | |

Confession Chamber

Forgive me Father for I have sinned,
for being born with you to begin,
its been a long time since my last confession,
I don't wont your blessing,
lies and resurrection.
I don't believe in love, I don't believe in faith,
cant stand my own kind,
humble in hate,
I don't believe in truth, I don't wont to be saved,
erase me from your list,
buried, unmarked,
graved.

Abused as a child,
bloodstains of a man,
only shovel awaits,
forgive me if you can.


Details | Rhyme | |

Why deny the surprise?

Why do you sit there?
Watching life pass you by
Why do I see tears?
In your brilliant eyes.

Why can't you see the bird?
Flying right behind you
Why can't you hear?
Its song, it is sung for you.

Why don't you know?
That nature sees you and watches you
Why don't you know?
It wishes to be seen and watched by you.

Why are you