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Funny Spring Poems | Funny Poems About Spring

These Funny Spring poems are examples of Funny poems about Spring. These are the best examples of Funny Spring poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Couplet | |

Garden Pests

'Tis another glorious spring and I planted my garden with the expectation,
That I shall reap a bountiful harvest for my table with minimum frustration!

I planted the usual stuff - carrots, radishes, onions and termaters,
Watermelons, peas, corn, beans and a few hills of russet pertaters.

With the Good Lord's help, lots of sun and occasional showers of rain,
The seeds sprang to life along with some curses that are my infernal bane!

I've discovered that I have a healthy crop of weeds that need attention,
And a host of other intrusive visitors that I'll proceed to mention!

I was dismayed to discover legions of caterpillars and mealy bugs,
Pruning my plants along with hordes of ugly snails and slimy slugs!

They're even being attacked from below by gophers and moles,
And from above by crows making diving sorties from the clothesline poles!

'Coons, 'possums and wabbits at raiding my garden are very deft,
And armies of well-disciplined ants are gleaning what is left!

I even caught some nasty little kids filching a watermelon last night!
I chased them but those little dudes took off with the speed of light!

With a storm of wind and hail this morn I saw all my labor disappear!
Come next spring I think I shall opt to sit on the patio and guzzle beer!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved


Details | Alliteration | |

Silly spring alliteration

A pig in peplum and pearls
under a pergola twirls.
Pendulous petunias sway
while percussion plays.
Whispering spring breezes,
a tickle in my nose, i sneezes.


Details | Rhyme | |

Went Fishin'


Submitted to the "Gone Fishin" contest
------------------------------------------------

Trollin’ the islands at Texoma,
It was April, 1964.
New rod and reel in hand,
I’d NEVER been fishing before.

A Garcia 2510T casting rod.
The reel, a Mitchell 301,
Plus hand-selected worms and lures…
I was ready to have some fun.

My teacher, a master fisherman,
Had fished all over the earth...
From trout in Austrian mountain streams
To sea bass just west of Perth.

He showed me all the basics,
Including how to tie a lure.
“No snaps. They’re no good.
Tie’em on…just to be sure.”

He made me practice casting.
“Take aim with your rod’s tip 
Take her back - ten, eleven, twelve, one;
Smoothly return to ten… with just a little flip.”

While I practiced the casting motion,
He said, “Large Mouths will be jumpin’ bugs.
Water’s bubblin’ with Sand Bass spawnin’.
You’ll know the difference if one gives you a tug.”

As we drifted around the islands,
He said, “I think you’re ready.”
So, I picked a lure, a pretty Heddon;
And tied her on.  My hands were steady.

Yellow with black dots and a weed guard. 
A streamer tail and double treble hooks.
Who knew if she would do the job,
But I liked the way she looked.

As I tied her on, I looked around
For a likely place for my first cast.
Magazine pictures always showed weeds
In the background of a striking Bass.

So, I picked a reed bed in the shallows;
Threw my first cast, watched her fly.
What happened next was the stuff of dreams.
We couldn’t believe our eyes. 

About eighteen inches before she lit,
A monstrous Large Mouth erupted from the water.
My teacher screamed, “Holy Mary, Mother of God!  
Kiss O’Reilly’s Ugly Daughter!”

When the Bass broke water, it scared me. 
My whole body jerked and shook.
So sudden, so silent, it seemed like slow motion.
Until I heard him screaming, “Set the hook!  Set the hook!”

When the big Bass scared me,
I must have set the hook.
The tussle was on, long and hard.
This fish didn’t want to be cooked.

My lack of skills prevailed, however,
As I finally reeled him in;
I grabbed him by the lower lip,
Like I’d seen Don Wallace do, time and time again.

“Oh, my God”, he murmured as he weighed the Bass;
“Jeez.  Over thirteen pounds....Thirteen pounds, two.”
He took out his Polaroid and laughed, 
“I’ll take a picture of this fish... holdin' you.”

He snapped the picture of me holding the Bass;
On the back wrote the date, the length and weight.
As he turned to put the camera away……
Get ready.  This is the part that’s great.

I’d watched Don Wallace ‘catch and release’.
He always did that on his show.
“This fish put up a good fight.” he’d say;
“Now it’s time to let him go.”

Yes, as my teacher put away the camera,
I held the big Bass by the lower lip and tail
And ‘swished’ him in the water,
Making sure his gills would not fail.

My teacher turned and saw what I was doing
Just as I let the big Bass go.
This, too, was like slow motion
As I heard him screaming, “NOOOOOOO!”

“Why would you do that, Lad?
Do ya know nothin’ at all?
A fish like that... on your very first cast?
Well...Lad, that fish goes on the wall.”

“Well…he’ll be here next year.” I said with a smile,
“And even bigger, I’ll bet.”
He said, ”You’ll make a fisherman, Lad.
It’s not for the fish that we fish…

but for the great stories we get.” 

I still have that lure…and the rod and reel.
Still in their bags and boxes, just like new.
I thought about selling them on eBay,
But 50 years later, they have sentimental value.

You see…I’ve been invited to go fishin’ several times
By golfin’ buddies and other friends;
But for some reason…I really don’t know why…
I’ve never gone fishin’ again.

They say, “Truth is stranger than fiction.”
And I believe that is a fact.
I hope you enjoyed this bit of truth and,
In the meantime…..”Ya’ll come back!”


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

Spring Kiwi


Close to the Patriots' free kick
upon the North of Eastern lands
a kiwi eats her seeds' pique-nique
next to jazz concerts, Harvard grands.

Because (it's true) upon the grass
the student-birds attend Spring's feast,
men wear belt-buckles made from brass,
and girls, leg warmers on blue jeans.

The kiwis play in plain sunlight
and synthesize 'bout ancient queens
Spring smiling poetry they write
next to Charles river - on fresh greens.

The kiwi's happy to attend
from all the nations friends to meet,
cause in New England students blend,
and colors shine on jazz downbeat.

© 04-09-2013, G. Venetopoulos
(Iambic tetrameter)


Details | Light Poetry | |

OH NO, OH NO

Oh No! Oh No! What has my son done? I hope it’s, not already to late!
He lives at a fraternity house, and surely, you know THAT intense mental state.
March has St. Patrick’s Day, Spring Break, and has, of course, Easter in it, too.
So they decided to have some great fun, yes, a fun filled month to happily ensue.

They invited a Leprechaun, the Easter Bunny, and the king of bongos, a gnome.
Apparently they convinced everyone it’d be more fun, to Simply… Stay… Home.
The whole campus flooded thru that fraternity house, in the party’s that ensued.
And they convinced the Easter Bunny to do jello shots in every color and hue.

He became known as THE BUN, yes, The One who finally, truly could fly…
And the Leprechaun danced till he dropped… to a great bongo serenade, aye.
There was no SIMPLY about this! As the music rocked the frat house, next door.
And girls were seen coming and going, at all hours, even passed out on the floor.

This was the party no one missed… even the frat house with the snobs, were there.
It’s said even some of the President’s security attended, partying there, somewhere.
Before they were done, a plan was sown, as the gnome found it’s yearly, new home. 
Yes, it got there, in Washington somehow, on the top of the Real ‘White House’ Dome.

But along the way THE BUN was lost… some where along the never-ending roads.
The Leprechaun called me, our Dragons and Trolls, to help, to search the highroads.
The poor little guy was so pie eyed, when we found him along that crazy way, so…
We fixed him up, we didn’t give up, until we could send him, into that Easter Frey.

Contest: Show Me The Funny


Details | Haiku | |

April

April time is near
Tax man on the prowl
Pockets empty


Details | Free verse | |

Soy Sauce Spills

Soy sauce drains 
Into the white, clustered rice
Stepped on…
spills . . . 
Soy sauce taints
The whiteness of the grain
 It slips out of my hands
No use...no point in crying out in rage
Though I was starving, 
I'll just eat another thing and start on a new page

I'm hungry like a swine
I wish I can earn back my snack!
I'm as angry as a bull
I'm about ready to attack! Attack!
Soy sauce packages
Fall unto the dirty school ground
Stepped on
By bratty, conceited teens
They really need to eat their greens
Instead of junkfood and pizza
They should drink some water
Instead of drinking sugary drinks or
 Sucking on popsicles obnoxiously
Why did the soy sauce spill? Seriously....


Details | Haiku | |

a kiss of sunshine

a kiss of sunshine pouty crimson horizon cock-a-doodle-doo


Details | Rhyme | |

Digging Out

Three cups of espresso
I was raring to go
Grabbed the shovel
Out into the snow

Slipped in a hole
Sunk up to my knees
In spite of my gloves
My fingertips freeze

I have the brush
Start swiping at snow
Trying to find
The windshield below

Turn on the car
Let it defrost
Don't drop anything !
'til Spring it'd be lost

Thirty minutes later
I can see my whole car
Start shoveling to the road
Thank God it's not far

Put the car in low gear
Drive forward to the street
Reverse to my spot
Then twice more repeat

My new winter tires
Finally get used
But with two feet of snow
I'm less than amused

The path now is made
I go back inside
Admire my handiwork
With chilly pride

Glad to be off work
On this snowy day
Tomorrow I'll be ready
To just drive away

Hoping that's it
Winter's had its fun
Bring on the Spring !
Bring on the sun !


Details | Verse | |

Leeroy von Nebulae

Leeroy von Nebulae y Pitter Patter Supernova

Upon the sparkling April field, where the bell-flowers blossomed,
two poets stood amid the blooms, two writers of their wisdom,
where singing aves exalted them, cause deep in verse have fathomed
and treated poetry like none, with loyalty and serfdom.

Meantime the birds were chirping in the leafage of the forest
the two composers synthesized the crop of thoughts that random
became their poetry's free verse, philosophy, thus, modest,
the scriptures called bankrupted talk and artlessness of flotsam.

The authors, thus, amid the trees, and vervains' purple colors,
narrated 'bout the pepper steaks and pizzas pepperoni,
the grayish donkeys and their bray, through softened words of candor
conducting hence this spectacle and joyous ceremony.

What was occurring round the two was godly sent, on purpose;
the softened breeze, the sunny morn, the singing of the birdies,
and furthermore their kindest verse that both believed was flawless,
- the soul's redemption stands upon the praising by the toadies.

Obtusely raising, slow but firm, their tilted thoughts euphoric
have driven both to fly above this natural assemblage,
hence joyful they enjoined the cause of logic anti-strophic,
amid the clouds envisioning a pizza-Heaven-cottage.

Leeroy von Nebulae y Pitter Patter Supernova
expressed their nothingness of verse, that donkeys then recited
and stood impassive 'mid the blooms, their thoughts a dull cadenza,
evaluated by the birds, that chirped their notes, astounded.

© 03-23-2014, G. Venetopoulos, All Rights Reserved
(Iambic decapentasyllabic verse)


Details | Blank verse | |

Kill Da Wabbit

                    Kill Da Wabbit
              (a low IQ non fat Haiku) 

Carrot hangs on branch

Kill da wabbit kill da wabbit

C.I.L.L....... da wabbit


Details | Light Poetry | |

Laughter of the Rain

I'm hearing the laughter
of the new Spring rain
that we must shortly
wash our cars again.
And the moistening dirt
is laughing too
at the cold, wet mud
getting splashed on you!
Yes, and I believe
that the thunder's clap
is for the puddle
soaking into your lap.

And I hear the giggling
of the gathered drops
since we can't wear sandals
or our new flip flops.
And the grass, leaves and twigs
choking up every drain
chuckle at their mother's
latest refrain.
Listen to their snickers
when eveything gets wet.
They hope to spoil Mother's hair;
for it is freshly set.

Oh, Mother Nature's clan
can sure be mean
while they are painting our world
a fresh and new spring green.
But they say they're sorry,
or did you not know-
when they present to us later
a freshly tied rainbow.


Details | Light Poetry | |

What Just Happen to My Spring

I looked out side to find a nice day in the month of May
And was walking in the evening just to say
I almost cried and my hands got cold
And winter month got so bold
It was so frustrating and out of the norm
And each person in their heart had a storm
It's the month of May what the! happen to spring
And my headache began to ring
Most people on the first day of May was so happy
And now they look out on the second day sappy
I just want everyone to know it is May 2, 2013
And nothing should be in between
So pullout your snow shovels in dismay
And things you should know will be okay
So good morning to all and to all a good morning
And I just want you to be out their in a warning
The snow is at six inches and beyond
And you will not see green grass in dawn
I help myself by writing this poem
And I will be staying at home
Crazy the weather became bad in May and nasty
I brought out some of my snack and that was tasty
I just looked outside while I was eating
As the snow kept on beating


Details | Haiku | |

SWAN SONG a spring haiku

SWAN SONG

black ice fools
swans’ midnight landing
feathers slide

winds laughter
tickles newborn twigs
raven’s smirk


Victoria Anderson-Throop


Details | Rhyme | |

Spring Brings Peace

Give me a season....give me a reason...to start anew
It's gonna be autumn soon and the leaves are dropping like dew
Give me a season...give me a reason...to change color
I bet I'd be the color blue....Ohoohooooh... But I'm just a blur
Give me a stairway...teach me the baby steps...to start anew
It's gonna be a tornado...pretty soon and the wind is blowing so true
Hold my hand...hold it tight...give me your trust...give me a sign of contentment
I bet you're the color yellow...like the burning sun....ohoohoooooh...we'll set up a tent

We'll be together at last...the ocean won't separate us...ohoohoooooh no!
We'll be partners at task....the mountains won't make us give up...ooh ooh no!
We'll be together all the time!
We'll be together...no matter what time...
What season...what day...what hour
We both got the power
And we won't cower!
We will blossom up like a flower
And we will be as vigilant as a tower! 

I'll change the season to spring time
Just for you...just for you...
I'll obliterate the darkness and destruction...I'll wipe off the grime
From your hand...from your hand
Our friendship will never cease
And we'll create peace...
Peace in mind
Peace that you'll find
In the Spring time
There is a time
For peace, love and hope
I'll do what you wish and never say "nope!"
Because we'll be working together
And we will conquer!
And we will be stronger!

And we'll create peace...
in due time...we'll have peace in mind
Peace that we'll find
In the Springtime


Details | Rhyme | |

None of That City Water for Them

None of that City Water for Them

By Elton Camp

We have friends who tap water won’t drink
They complain about both its taste and stink

Instead of using the public water supply
To get it from a spring or well they try

The spring on the edge of town many thrill
They don’t see the septic tanks on the hill

Some spend to have their own well drilled
From it, keep their drinking vessels filled

But it hasn’t been treated with chlorine
The danger of that they haven’t yet seen

The neighbor’s hog pen they don’t see
Nor when his sons go outside to pee

Now I prefer what comes out of the pipe
For I have found no reason at all to gripe



Details | Free verse | |

Cleaning Day

I think that God had intended
For Spring cleaning.
After all, he intended for doors
To light dark corners,
The spiders to spin webs 
Along the walls..
The dust collecting 
On the surfaces,
The bird's song 
As an incentive 
To keep working.
The tiny sqeak
Of cleaning windows,
The allure
Of a newly made bed,
With my puppy by my pillow...
The crisp, clean look
Of a newly painted wall,
And the soft feel 
Of new carpet on your toes..
The clean smell
Of newly hung laundry, 
But most of all...
I think God had intended 
For Spring cleaning
As a darn good reason
To REST.


Details | Couplet | |

Spring Cleaning

Goodbye old friend it is time to go
Now that spring has melted the snow

The sunlight and rain brought freshness again
So it is time for spring cleaning to begin

It seems each year it is out with the old
Many things at a yard sale to be sold

Pots, pans, old clothes, shoes, and hats
Trinkets, tools, and a little of this and that

Someone will buy you and take you home
They will cherish you as their very own

Your time is only finished here and now
You’ll have a good life out there somehow

I don’t know what I’ll do now it’s true
I’m not sure I can live without you

Maybe with some fixing and a bit of a shine
I can make you last just a little more time

I think I will keep you just one more year
I would miss you too much, I see it so clear

This is the same thing I said last year
So we can’t tell my husband he can never hear

He’d never understand I’m not a pack rat
But let’s see him part with his cracked ball bat

So it looks like you’re safe right where you are at
But next year, well… I’ll think about that!






Details | Light Poetry | |

Spring

There`s a spring in my chair
It bounced itself out of there.
Darn this spring must be alive
It broke my antique vase with just one dive.
Bouncing free around the room
I gotta catch it and catch it soon!
Bouncing low bouncing high
Boy that spring could fly!
It just barely miss the cat
hitting my shins with one hard wack!
Now my room is a mess
I`m a little upset I must confess.
I grabbed the broom I hit that spring
sending it flying around in a ring.
It finally went out my door
returning to my house no more.


Details | Cowboy | |

Spring Part 1 Prose Poetry

                                                      Spring

	Ah, spring is in the air.  The time when Mother Nature renews herself. 
The loving arms of the sun and the tears of the clouds bring forth the little green 
shoots of promise.  The little animals have preformed their dances of renewal 
and their species is ensured. Ranching on the Rosebud Reservation of S. D. we 
had a cow calf operation.  Our springs were in tune with nature and not only did 
we calve in the spring but we also had a fall calving group.  We ran about four 
hundred cows and since we were basically a one man operation there were 
times my poor husband had to yield and allow me to help.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Crows Caw

Crows Caw
February 7, 9 2009

1234567
Crows in a row go

Caw caw caw caw caw caw caw
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring it’s spring
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring

Pay no attention to the snow on the ground
It’s 52 degrees - the sky’s all around
Watch as we fly up down, back and forth
We’re heading East West South and North

Caw caw caw caw caw caw caw
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring it’s spring
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring 

We don’t care what the calendar has to say
Or Punxitawny Phil’s shadow on the 2nd day 
Everyone knows February is the new March 
Global warming has passed on the torch 

1234567
Crows in a row go

Caw caw caw caw caw caw caw 
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring it’s spring
It’s spring it’s spring it’s spring” 

Pay attention! Did I mention?
CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW