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Funny Forgiveness Poems | Funny Poems About Forgiveness

These Funny Forgiveness poems are examples of Funny poems about Forgiveness. These are the best examples of Funny Forgiveness poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Alliteration | |

Stink Thinking

Poem by: Mr. Ronald Watson
Sep. 13, 2012
My Poetry on PoetrySoup

Stinking Thinking

Stinking thinking/ it leads to drinking./
What moisten the soul without an inkling?/
Unto making a wild left turn /while the right signal light were blinking./
Within a mild mix of rice, hops, and barley,
Since/ it is too much laugher at a karaoke party./
How Elvis sounds like,/ a broken Bob Marley?/
Now it’s as if,/ inhibitions are lowed/
Frozen in time/ and slipping far out of control./
As intuitions of minds does loathe,/ as such weariness echoes for tomorrow./
Yet,/ a stinking breath that smells just as death/ and it's where all funky asses dwells./
Though/ all hung over /and unjustified to flinging heavy heads into that porcelain king,/ 
Even this is a sight for red sore eyed Kings!/ 
It is an aftermath of ravishing through them royal purple cloth bags./
So/ afraid to admit that shallowness slowly drags!/
When,a sense of clarity which will just admit it.
That stinking thinking is difficult to kick, but
One day at a time, it is the only way to shine, or get fixed.  

Thank youMy Poetry on PoetrySoup
God Bless.


Details | I do not know? | |

Monty Python Flying Circus

If one room of writing I can never leave,
Than faithful I will remain.
Hopeful clown,
Dancing joy in books.
Paint my face with colorful ink,
Scrolls cloth me in bagginess.
Bringing a smile & laughter to overcome the pain,
Everyday living.
Lord,
My Witness indeed.
Looking down from the Heaven.
Lived I did,
Mostly dark moments.
My life past,
Overcast writings.
Living Sheol I thought could never be broken,
Ball & chain no more.
Therefore,
Help others,
My destiny?
Welcome little boy in me,
Time to play!
Lord,
Once in awhile he needs his nap.
Can the man take the pen?
Like every child he desires cookies & milk.
Cookies are the joices of others,
Milk to carry on after the reading in joyful hope.
So!
Here I am Monty Python,
I'm signing on the dotted line!
O?
By the way,
We'll discuss my pay later!


Details | Rhyme | |

Her Sense of Humor

A slight hint of consternation was in her voice,
“Why did you tell those people I’m deaf and dumb?”
“I never said you were deaf, my Dear.”
She laughed, but I kinda felt like a bum.

Hell.  It was just a joke.

One evening, she asked, “Will you love me if I get chubby?”
I responded, “Of course I still love you.
It would take much more than pounds and cellulite
To make me fall out of love…it’s true.”

Hell.  It was just a joke.

“Would you remarry if I die before you?” she asked.
I said, “No…probably not…I’ve been spoiled by you.”
“But you’ve been a great husband. I think you should.”
“Whatever happens, happens is the best I can do.”

“If you remarried, would you play golf with your new wife?
And would you let her use my clubs?” she demanded.  
I calmly smiled and said, “Your clubs are safe.
You see, my Dear…she’s left handed.”

Hell.  It was just a joke.

Then, she whined and whined about her butt.
I responded, “Want to knock some inches off that ass?
It may sound strange, but I heard it works….
Rinse all your panties in Slim Fast.”

Hell. It was just a joke.


The next day, I readied for work, took ‘undies’ from my drawer.
They were engulfed in a fog of white, why I didn’t know.
So, I asked, “Honey! Why did you put talcum powder on my shorts?”
She slyly smiled, “That’s not talcum powder.  That’s Miracle Gro.”

Hell.  It was just a joke....I guess.

So, what is my wife’s most endearing feature?
Her sense of humor.... there’s no doubt.
Always a smile where angst or anger might have been,
A smile I never want to be without.



Details | ABC | |

Skin

You send bolts through my skin 
something I was never to 
accomplish with you, when I 
saw you it's like my heart sank 
to my stomach and I was in 
shock my body still my body 
heavy felt like when I moved I 
was about to fall to my knees 
you make me want to get 
inside my brain pick you up and 
take you out pick you one by 
one like a flower because I do 
love you and love you not.


Details | Haiku | |

Dancing Angels

Angels in heaven
Dancing on a small puddle
Always stay afloat


Details | Free verse | |

Ridiculous Me

Watch this scene with both eyes and try not to blink C: --> 

I stood there... silently
Like a predator near prey 
I sneak behind YOU

You weren't even aware of it!! Ha-ha! 

I made YOU jump hIgH
Like a startled hare
I chuckle and smile

You know that mischievous smile of mine? 

Your reaction was
PRICELESS - you were so upset
But YOU forgave me

Well...I'm flattered. . . 

We laugh'd together (just like the good times)
In a chorus - our volume
Picked up extreme sound

Believe me - I could hear our laughter from a mile away!

But I'm glad I did
My best to make you giggle

Ridiculous me... 
Wouldn't you agree?


Details | ABC | |

The Vent

im livin in a world, where all eyes on me.
trying to curve my own route.
but route 66 keeps finding its way to me.
ive been plenty sick, in all the events layed before me.
even when i reflect to my lowest points
i dont regret any of the choices
That I’ve deployed in my era
A lot of it by error, but hey
We live in hell conditions and there ain’t no air condition 
Or any guidelines when life throws you in the sidelines
But when hindsight twenty twenty hits
You’ll begin to understand life’s a bunch of equations and you in the mix of it
An you’ll have to think twice, before running into a situation and becoming the best of it
Situations
it’s what got me here, it’s what got us here
Ran with my thoughts blazing up to her place and
Guess what happened next
She opened up heaven’s gate
And just before late I slipped out
Simply put 
I’m a Grown ass man
Doin his thing, waitin to blow up like an old land mine
In doin what he drools over
But time after time 
Something decides to creep up and cover the light
Lost my way
Then I revoked to ever know, I ever thought that way
But in the in between time, that in the mean time 
Spent a lot of time
Gettin pissed off just to medicate and lift off
Don’t need Don Perion to sip off
Already had my way with the bottle
Even thought to get back with the trouble and rejoin the hustle
That’s just what happens to a man who really knows his old ways
Whos tired of making ends meet and ponders getting back to the streets.
Memory sets in and he remembers an O.G. saying
No matter how tall your pockets stand when you ball
Eventually times gonna make you fall
Fall
And I as I pull myself together 
I don’t wanna end up like the twin towers rubble
I mean no offence to nine eleven but at that time I probably could have used a reverend
But all that’s irrelevant now
because i live with a different perspective now

there you go you made it to the end :-) comment if you like, constructive criticism wanted as well.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Public Nuisance Number 1

Dragon made the papers for that very unfortunate Church event, toots sweet.
Then Dragon, suddenly, decided to finger-paint billboards, all over the town.
He’d discovered painting was sooo cool, and wanted to, spread his joy around.
It wouldn’t have been bad, but the Mayor was on them, and it was election time.

He didn’t like psychedelic mustaches, as yes; he even considered them a crime.
Dragon was called to court, lickety split, as the National news came into town.
We saw the writing on the wall, before it began; Dragon was, about to be banned.
So Grandpa Troll and I put our heads together, as never before, we needed to plan.

Now the aim would be to turn a fiasco, into a miracle beyond anything, to compare.
Dragon entered, with head held high, painted, shined, and leashed, as a dragonfly.
The newspapers called, were mesmerized, this’d be great to make readership, fly! 
All the businesses were booming, with visitors coming from everywhere, to stare.

The judge and mayor glowered, with menace, as the charges were read, out loud.
When asked what we had to say for ourselves, this is what I replied to the crowd…
Church ministries have gone viral, collecting new followers, all around the world. 
Yes we are sorry, for the mischievous, and crazy lives we seem to live, and unfurl.

The town is flourishing, in spite of all we do, and we volunteer our work, each week.
The State Fair wants, Dragon, to replace plane flyovers, unaffordable to put on, here.
But, if we aren’t wanted… we’ll take bids, and then with heavy hearts, we will go.
Yes, we’ll solve the problem, by saying goodbye, and then leaving you all, alone.

There were fees to pay, as only a few towns’ people applauded, that we would go.
Alas, the Preacher, and businessmen realized, their newfound profits would go, also.
The mayors’ dislike toward us, became the towns problem, as it hit the national news.
Protestors, environmentalists, and endangered species lawsuits were now filed, anew.

Trolls, Dragons, and Mary River Turtles are rare, so the government, stepped in, too.
They declared the National Forest and our home, as a new, kind of wildlife refuge.
As we went viral on the Internet, the town applauded us, in a political, turn around.
Dragon became everybody’s friend, and got to do State Fair acrobatics, in the end.

Wow, my head is still spinning, from all this, as with results, we were over whelmed.
The moral to this story is: never give up and, yes, of course, learn to use… the Internet.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Dragon Fly

(To be read after my 'Fire and Brimstone'.)

Dragon Fly, Dragon  Fly, fly away home. You’ve caused enough trouble here, I am told.
All you wanted was to ring the church bell, but the belfry your body did not take well.
Terrible things happened all around, and the belfry you left is certainly not sound.
Old Lady Moore still has her cane, to protect them again, if you cause harm, within.
Old Lady Swanson’s lost hat is her major complaint, apologize profusely, be a saint!
The Church belfry will need lots of work; by the carpenter Trolls to fix it’s bridgework.
The people all need to calm down, they were scared and now the church is shutdown.
Looks like they’ll need a new fancy annex to be built for weddings and such… 
To help them  forgive… even… ever… slightly… enough. Though, of course…
The preacher himself…wants you back, for sure; I am definitely, and totally assured.
He’s never been inspired to such lofty greatness to soar, never, not even, once before.
He says you hold his key, to reach the lost, as they tune in to see what’s coming next.
He wants to add even, the Trolls to the mix. If they can be saved, well, you get the gist.
And you’ll have to attend church for quite a while, yes, still, as an itsy bitsy Dragonfly.
You’ll need to get forgiveness from all, you know, before you grow big, again, I am told.
The witch is quite clear on this spell, a dragonfly you’ll stay till everything’s made well.
Seems, you also, owe them an apology, for half scaring them… well… nearly to death.
Bumps, bruises, and a broken arm need to heal, from jumping over the pews, they feel.
Plus some of the teenagers, have made tee shirts of you, and want your autograph, too.
You see, your limited edition, when signed, will pay their way to bible camp, this time.
And the girl with the cast on her arm, wants a picture of you on a leash, so be charming!
You see, you scared her, a really whole lot, if she can pet you, her fear will be forgot.
It seems, you really messed up, this time, you see… but all will be forgiven, eventually.
So Dragon Fly, Dragon Fly, fly away home. They understood, once your story was told.
If you agree to all I have said: They’ll give you a bell outside, to ring before church…
Each and every Sunday Morn, with a special alcove, made for only you, to perch...

Remember, if God can love a mischievous little Dragonfly... And he can love you, too.
So until next church time... Bye Bye...


Details | Limerick | |

Bow Pow

<                                    cakes and sausages on hot griddle
                                      uncle Leroy's dam dog just piddled
                                      slipped ~ slide across floor
                                      grabbed shotgun by front door
                                      now dam ole dog just plays an fiddle 



                            bow bow bow bow bow bow bow        bow ~ wow 
                            ow ow ow ow ow ow ow                       bow ~ ow 
                            with   tail    between     own  ~              legs 
                            now    dog    sings  ~    and  ~               brags
                            about cousin's daisies's  bad                 bow ~ pows
                  
                                                                                        
                                                                                     


Entry For John Freeman's
Slapstick Limerick Contest
Gl All

Poor Ole Dog LOL


Details | Light Poetry | |

Poetic PRESCRIPTION:

                               NO REFILLS---Dr. P. Soupenstein
                               Rx *7563287      BEC 11/11/11      
Seems to me,
what you need 
for healing this condition...
is something real
you can feel
to ease this mean affliction

Patient please
accept from me
this poetry prescription:

      ( <_____PUSH & TURN_____> )

Take ONE positive poem
Read ORALLY 2 times BY MOUTH -----
Every 4-6 HOURS AS NEEDED for the pain 

Blues and belly aches will dissipate
resulting in healthy energy gains 

                  WARNING!!!
-Alcohol may intensify the effect of being drowsy 
attempting to read while operating machines... 
will cause you to drive lousy.


Details | Narrative | |

Follow The Winner

 Some folks always follow the winner 



 I didn't even have the courage 
To tell you how you made me feel 
Your laughter 
Your body language 
Way back then, 
A wall flower. 

you thought that I weren't good enough 
Undeveloped beauty 

Now, Virtuousness, 
I am blooming; 

People always follow the winner


Details | Clerihew | |

-JAIL-BIRD'S-PRAYER

Oh Lord,forgive the arresting officer
who first caught me when I committed crime__
for destroying my future.
Again,I pray to blindfold the inspector of police__
that He may order police officers to delete my 
picture and name from the 'wanted persons list'__
Also, make lazy police officers assigned to arrest
me from my hiding place__
Jail changed my life!

chipepo lwele
*Dedicated to hardcore Jailbirds


Details | Free verse | |

Soy Sauce Spills

Soy sauce drains 
Into the white, clustered rice
Stepped on…
spills . . . 
Soy sauce taints
The whiteness of the grain
 It slips out of my hands
No use...no point in crying out in rage
Though I was starving, 
I'll just eat another thing and start on a new page

I'm hungry like a swine
I wish I can earn back my snack!
I'm as angry as a bull
I'm about ready to attack! Attack!
Soy sauce packages
Fall unto the dirty school ground
Stepped on
By bratty, conceited teens
They really need to eat their greens
Instead of junkfood and pizza
They should drink some water
Instead of drinking sugary drinks or
 Sucking on popsicles obnoxiously
Why did the soy sauce spill? Seriously....


Details | Free verse | |

Unwavering Schedual

 
She carries temptation in her pocket 
With a secret smile, and a subtle beckon
I’ll be damned if I don’t follow 
She drags my world behind her as she walks 
The centerpiece of every portrait 
She shrugs her shoulders as if she doesn’t know 
She wears my agenda like a tea shirt 
She casually says that I COULD spend the night 
As if I may or may not say yes 
One breathe of air is all I get 
Before I’m drowning in her bed
I couldn’t leave to save my life
Even if i wanted to

By Kyle Ezra Kriticos 


Details | Ballad | |

LAZY MOON

No mind to wait
From the pained wind
Down's moon
For the last siren.

I got that feeling
Everywhere I go she will 
Be watching me from above.


Details | Nonet | |

Little Hell Raisers { Nonet}

<                             I'm going on journey ~ back in time
                               When I should of listened to my .... heart
                               But instead just followed ....  head 
                               What a mistake that .... was
                               Let me tell you .... now
                               Poor old ... lady
                               Didn't ... do
                               Noth ~ ing
                               Wrong !



                              Carrying her groceries home from the ... store
                              Me ~ brother ~ sister ~ brother's ... friend
                              Tossing lit~ firecrackers
                              Laughing ... and .... giggling 
                              Looking ~ for ... trouble
                              And here she ... came
                              Four ..... against
                              Just ... one
                              Wow   !



                              Bet poor old women didn't .... expect
                              Handfull of lit .... firecrackers
                              To be tossed in her own .... bags
                              Others ran like .... dickens
                              I stayed and helped   ...  her
                              Picked up her ... stuff
                              And ... carried
                              Them ... all
                              Home !
                           
                           
                           
                           
Entry For
Linda Marie's
A Journey Back In Time
G.L. All


Details | Haiku | |

Note to Self

Stop writing haikus
They don’t even make sense now
Something something cake


Details | I do not know? | |

Im so Very Sorry

I brought you all here today
For something very important I have to say
An apology of some sorts
Lets start with you the oldest of course
I’m sorry that you don’t shut up
I’m sorry that your such a klutz
I’m sorry you have no brain
Oh an I’m sorry that you are you
But most of all I’m sorry I love you
Now who is next
Yes you in the shorts
I’m sorry that things don’t go your way
I’m sorry that everything is a game
I’m sorry if you can never be serious
I’m sorry that your delirious 
Yes many things are very wrong with you
Oh and I’m sorry I love you
Hmm next let me see
The youngest one of the ones I see
Yes I am sorry for who you are
I’m sorry for your life thus far
I’m sorry that you complain so much
I’m sorry that you mess up
I’m sorry that you cant think straight
I’m sorry you also have no brain
But most of all I’m sorry that I love you
Oh this felt good yes indeed
But oh oh oh
I’m sorry I love you three!!!

*Dedicated to all the people I love no matter what*


Details | Limerick | |

Lock Up

<                             once there was a girl locked in closet
                               dear old dad said well thats what you get
                               little did he come know
                               let out by little bro
                               but recaptured by moms fishing net 





Entry For Leighann Anderson's
Sea Of Words Contest
G.L. All                               


Details | Sonnet | |

The Broken Girl-not me

Is my life not tortured enough for you to see? 
I am broken as can be. 
My heart is torn. 
My tears stain these perfect floors.  
Why are singing with glee? 
Why do you not care about my every plea? 
I am trapped in your arms. 
I am the hopeless moth. 
How did you pick me? 
What is it that you see? 
A girl untouched by life? 
A flower blooming in the desert? 
I have said goodbye to my loving integrity.  
You took that from me through R-A-P-E.


Details | Rhyme | |

That bewildering cake

That bewildering cake, flung to her 
thoughts as she raced to the microwave!
Ready to eat all those scraps, put in her 
face... She was Ready. Ready to face this
bewildering cake.

This bewildering cake made no mistake
on her as she watched it sit in the 
microwave that one night... Silently preying
on something so small, but something more
delicious than all.

She grabbed a fork, and a plate. 
About to make a really bad mistake.
Until one minute later, her Mom had
awoke... and no further lies were told..

"Sally, oh Sally, what have you done? You 
ruined my chocolate cake that was made 
for my Mom!" She looked at her, sadly, her
face filled with tears as she made way to her
Mom saying "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! But it was 
so much fun!!" 

Her Mom then smiled and held her head within 
her chest, gripping the plate and what she said
next, made all the difference. "That's okay 
sweetie it's only the second to last one!!"
-Alley






Details | Cowboy | |

Untitled

Tainted love 
or tired love?
Smug attitudes
and weak games
Look at you!
Your such a lame!
Me cry?! Ha! Not no more!
NOT EVER!
Five point five years
What a joke?!
All you do is lie
Keep smoking your life away!
Wake up before its too late!
Before this love turns into hate!
Your too old to act this way!
Your too comfortable
You cant stay!
In my life!
In my way!
Goodbye to you!!!


Details | Lyric | |

Counterpole

My rhymes are timeless while this time is lifeless
why is life this kind less, reminds me that this
mind is spineless ready to tip and quit, as
my lies become mindless and get swollen shut
and Stuck up inside my sinus
Drivin in my prime but with no optimus
Victim to the flip-side of the Midas
Running through my blood like a virus
The sun makes my skin mundane
rubbin on ben gay but get arthritis
touch spermicide and converts to hepatitis
I hit the plus sign but it just musters up a minus
I'm seen sucking my thumb like the peanut's Linus
I run and duck when I hear the sirens cause
I abducted the president's Nike air pumps
now air force one is trying to find us
I'm at my desk obsessin about success but
This whole time its been right behind us


Details | Limerick | |

Quit Wasting My Time { Edit }

<                               One by one they'll shall roll on and come
                                 Like soldiers marching to beaten drums
                                 Echoes  are acknowledge
                                 Cast across thy arched bridge
                                 Haste makes waste even for everyone




Inspired By
Carolyn Devonshire's Contest
Follower Or Leader
GL All


Details | Free verse | |

Ball of Fire

Today is Doomsday.

Some believe today is Doomsday
Some say maybe the end of the year
However, do we really care?
How would the earth end?
In a ball of fire or 
would it swallow us up into puff of dust
in a matter of an hour..

I rather am buried under pile of snow.
Eternal Preservation "what a nice way to go

However do we have option in a world?
Where lunatics have taken over asylums
where deranged souls spreading like a social cancer 
Is doomsday  the answer..?


Details | Free verse | |

Smile anyway

It is better to love and lost Well, you have heard the saying                                               but what I was trying to say is to never love at all                                                             that would be sad and that would make a clown frown                                                       while searching for words to make you smile                                                                     Is that a trick question you are the one judging                                                                with that poetry police and destroying going on                                                             What thinketh a poet and you did not know it                                                                    it is all fun and games until you have won                                                                    Who made this a contest anyway needless to say                                                              I am going to give you a peace of my mind pardon pun or not                                   whether I win this contest or not I think                                                                          You should know You have already have one                                                                And by the way I hope you find all you are looking for                                                     love you like a sis and this I would have no one miss                                                        Jesus loves you  Thanks for sharing always                        *                            *                           - scientist find blue iceberg/ A blue iceberg is visible after the ice from above the water melts, causing the smooth portion of ice from below the water to overturn. The rare blue ice is formed from the compression of pure snow, which then develops into glacial ice.


Details | Prose Poetry | |

TIME

Tick tack  on the wall,
Knocking all the wall,
Scaring us all,
Muscling the muscles,
Muscling the morsels in us,
Quickening the finest deep,
The hidden gold of gold,
A dignity of labour,
How loyal and diligent you are,
Precious and precarious,
Dangerous and conspicuous.
TIME !!TIME!!TICK TACK!

Running without waiting for anybody,
How impatient could man be,
In your sound you keep man,
In haste at everydawn,
Thou hath in the haste of full dawn,
Desperately desperate,
Anxiously anxious,
Wisely wise are we and you
Preciously precious,
Nothing can be done without you that's obivously obvious.
TIME !!TIME!!TICK TACK!


We chose to choose you,
Working to work with you,
Falling to fall with you,
No time no food,
No time no suite,
No time no cheat,
No time no shift,
No time no me,
there is set time for everything,
Mama use to say,
Patience is virtue of time,
that's the way whichever way.
TIME !!TIME!!TICK TACK!


Details | Personification | |

My eX-gIRL fRIEND We Are Getting Married

This is a long lost dream story about Me and my EX-GIRL getting it back together again? Just who knows' where it will end......



***************
My ex-girlfriend and me
We are talking about
The possibility of getting
Married and I said that
We shall see.....
     ------
She asked' me if we were
Going to take lot's and lots'
           Of Picture's
And I answered, yes,
But We won' be taking
Them together  
     ------
And then She ask Me 
If it would be consummated
I said yes, but, only if it came
         With Tea'

                     GF


Details | I do not know? | |

FEAR!!!!!

I RUN from FEAR.

I HUNT for FEAR.

I HIDE in FEAR.

I FIGHT cause of FEAR.

I'm FAR from you.

I'm SCARED cause of you.

You're the FEAR that I HUNT.

You're the FEAR that I FIGHT.

You're the FEAR that SCARED me for LIFE.

*Comment if you have any thought and if you like it. oh and some of the poems i write arn't 
always my feelings. their some times just to get through other people so they can have 
something to read that just fit's them.*

                                              -Angel4eva23