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Death Teen Poems | Death Poems About Teen

These Death Teen poems are examples of Death poems about Teen. These are the best examples of Death Teen poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Narrative | |

Sweetest Love Note

One night a guy & a girl were
driving home from the movies. The
boy sensed there was
something wrong because of the painful
silence they shared between them
that night. The girl then asked the boy to pull over
because she wanted to talk. She told him that her
feelings had changed & that it was time to move on.
A silent tear slid down his cheek as he
slowly reached into his pocket & passed her a folded note.
At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down
that very same street. He swerved
right into the drivers seat, killing the boy.
Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she
pulled it out & read it.
"Without your love, I would die."


Details | Epitaph | |

Forever In My Heart

A million times I've needed you
A million times I've cried
If love alone could have saved you
You never would have died
In life I loved you dearly
In death I love you still
In my heart you hold a place
No one can ever fill
It broke my heart to lose you
But you did not go alone                                            
A part of me went with you
The day GOD called you home
Your precious memory is my keepsake
With which I'll never part
GOD has you safely in HIS keeping
But I have you forever in my heart


Details | I do not know? | |

Bath of Blood

I sit here shaking in this warm water
The pain has come, for my life to barter.
Should i do it, let everything go.
I grab that razor and never let go.

I tilt my head back and take a breath
I soon feel the pain inside my chest.
My heart is pounding faster and faster.
I think in my head now I\'m the master.

Cutting and cutting away that pain
as the blood drips down, my life slowly fades.
I drop the blade, and watch it fade, into the 
Bath of blood that i have made.

Everythings gone, my life to.
into that red liquid, that makes me and you.
i am now free of all that pain, and all the suffering that never went away.

So now i lay here in my Bath of blood, looking down in at the soapy suds. Was it 
a dream or was it a fantasy.
I look at my wrists....and they still bleed.


Details | Rhyme | |

Pain

Pain is all I feel in my life, 
For example, like being cut with a knife.
Since I was born,
Pain is all that’s come to me.
I don’t understand,
So I ask just one question, Lord Why Me?
I’ve been hurt in many ways,
And no one cares they just want to get paid.
Why does money have to cause so much pain?
So much pain, that I cry more than it rains.
Pain is what my heart is mostly full of,
Cause no one cares, but the man above.


Details | I do not know? | |

Two Little Girls

Three Little Girls:
That's what we were,
Standing outside the school,
You, me, and her.
I remember how it felt 
When you began to cry,
The weighted look of sadness
Reflecting in your eyes.
You missed the place you'd been before,
Where you had built a life,
And here among such harshness,
You had met much strife.

A year later, two little girls we were,
The other off on her own.
We were two in love with the same boy,
And a great friendship had grown.
You'd tease me and we'd laugh,
For hours that seemed like days,
And even though it was you he chose,
Our friendship did not go away.

Two little girls: that's what we were,
Friends until the very end.
As the years passed by,
More & more time together we would spend.
Though maybe not as close, 
Were we, as I wish we could have been,
Our friendship was a strong one, 
Unlike any I had seen.
You never pulled away,
Or said you needed space.
You'd greet me at the door, We'd link arms, a great smile upon your face.

One little girl: that's what I am,
Now that you left me.
I needed you so much,
But I suppose you never really did see.
Two friends, we are, torn apart,
However, our friendship will live on.
For true friendship knows know limits,
The barrier an invisible line that has been drawn.

You're still with me, here, even today,
But your smile I cannot see.
Though you pulled away,
We're closer now than I could have ever hoped to be.

Two little girls: that's what we are,
For no one could pull us apart.
Just like those still with me,
You'll be forever in my heart.
If I had known you'd leave me here alone,
I would have tied you to my side.
I knew not of your intentions,
For the truth you chose to hide. 
You haven't left me here alone,
I just long to hear your voice.
You wrote "The End" to your story,
Without giving me a choice.

If I could, I'd hug you now,
The way I forgot to before.
You're still here with me,
But somehow I want more.
I want your laughter to ring out,
Your song to echo through the halls,
To see again the look upon your face when
We went exploring and found only horses' stalls.

I don't want to be one little girl,
Why did our fun have to end?
I want to be two little girls,
Not one who misses her friend.


Details | Free verse | |

I Just

A lifeless body
A hollow shell of what once was
She once spoke with passion
Laughed at a simple joke
She loved fiercely
An unconditional love
She was so happy
Shone brightly from the inside out
But then it all changed
She spoke scarcely
They saw sadness in her eyes
Eyes that shimmered with unshed tears
What had happened to this girl
Why had she lost her shine
Now she lays motionless on the ground
The blood pools under her
She's curled up
As if to ward off cold
Written on the wall are bright red letters
"I just wanted some one to care"


Details | Lyric | |

Dying Eyes

I have lost the will to change
Taking the path that leads to nowhere
The darkness is taking over
something i cannot repair 
If it is to be broken
Drowning in the sorrow
I cannot give in
Take the fall and run to the heavens
Im never going to bow
Im never going to break
I will not fall
I will not fade
I was made to take your breathe away
Whenever my hope is lost
Thats my chance to run for cover
Light the fuse and burn it up
I dont want to change the world
I just want to make it colder
Watching the end
With our dying eyes
Tell me where forever lies


Details | Free verse | |

Emotional Turbulence

The voices grow louder, Intensifying with emotion, anger lining every aggressive word. My insides squeeze tighter as the vitriol poisons my mind, How does such hostility exist? As the sound of hatred deepens, The feelings strengthen their grip, like a vice, So tight, I can no longer breathe All the negative emotions I have ever felt, fill me, Threatening to overflow. So long have they been banished… Enough. No more! My mouth opens, An earsplitting scream of pain and suffering shatters the silence, Sobs of sorrow and grief wrack my body, Murderous shrieks of anger and hate, Wretched cries of self-pity and self-loathing, Poison the air. Now, free of these emotions. But the monster still exists Within the dark depths of my mind.


Details | Free verse | |

Life Story

I was beaten
With a belt or a hand
Time after time
When I supposedly did wrong
They never warned
Just did
They don't care
So why should I
This is my life story
And I've chosen
Chosen the dark road
They always pushed me
Told me to do my best
But my best was never goo enough
They beat
They yelled
But not once did they ever think
That it would effect me
From 1-13 I have no recollection of happiness
There's a gap of where my memories should be
This is my life story
Cut short


Details | Lyric | |

From The Peircing Of An Arrow To The Cold Hearted Fate Of love

her life is on the tip of his tongue
the sparkle leaves her eyes
an arrow to his chest
drawing her to her death
a feather falling from the sky
the death of an angel
her wings turn blood red
like the color of the red sea
the sword drawn out of the ground
by her own hands
what he could not do himself
she has done for him
He falls unto to his knees
the arrow she had put into his chest
the greatest of betrayals
She asked for her death wish
Holding the ring in her palm
He looks into her eyes
watching the love she had left for him disappear
Falling into despair
Her face hitting the ground
Blood surrounded her body
He watched as she died
He couldn't move from the love that had pierced his chest


Details | Free verse | |

Boxed Life--She Sleeps with a Nine

Boxed Life

She sleeps with a nine
waits for his face
his distant return
too close
looming

A tragic slime
smooth stranger
smoother lover
pried into her life
obsessed
frantic
impossible to reject

she lives 
twisted
a boxed life
pulled by strings
too tight

An explosion is inevitable
the storm's coming
and she knows it
so she sleeps with a nine
and waits for his face


Details | Rhyme | |

Panic Room


Here in this room again 
mind’s racing 
the fan on low…

and I’m not to be trusted 
can’t be left alone here
with shot gun temples 
and a soul full of fear

no worse place than now
I can’t yell it more clearly 
I beg for your attention  
but I can’t stand you near me

contradiction swimming
in the blood of my veins
I’d cut off my hands
to send toxins to drain

I’m gutless
yet I’m too gutsy for action
say that in public
imagine the reaction

I sit in whirl pools
but I’ve always hated heat
and claim to take a stand 
but I’m lazy at my seat

and I’m always on time
as I miss the bus again
I lie in your face 
with a devilish grin

I’m harmless 
and swear I didn’t mean it
I talk about my conscience 
still I’ve never seen it 

in a world of swirling confusions
I’m stuck on the spin cycle
madness,
creating contusions
 
my game’s not over
I need a fresh start
I’m begging for new blood 
cus’ I’ve got a good heart


Details | Lyric | |

Normal To Me

This isn't just a poem This isn't just another emotion This is me, these are my thoughts The Imagery is my sight, And The Allegories are my Life I'm lonely, There is just me But there's so many people around but no one can hear my loudest screams Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me I'm torn, I'm Cut Part of my heart stabbed, and then taken from me The Search for my innocence, Is like a moa hunt Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Laughing and Jokes all directed towards me Just to Hurt me Cover all of the Halls "Fag, Emo, Queer" Words I too often know Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Curling her hair putting on her makeup "You're worthless and nothing to Me" Says the so-called all-loving-one As she screams: "Why am I not Pretty" Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me This is not just a poem not just some words my pen cries with each words But this is Just a Glimpse Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me


Details | Free verse | |

Die alone and born again

The man with the plastic bug in his head
monopolized my dreams last night
in the place that the horsefly of my dignity
finally surrender to the impresario without a fight.

Seven days and 7 hours transplanted in my memorabilia
reminding the rustiness of the purple child
flatterers danced beneath the clouds of melancholy
and morality spreader the master plan inside my mind.

The disinheritance of my immortality the final day
discouraged my desire to see the forbidden love
restored my will to escape
manipulated the deep of the uncertainty above.

Released from the plastic bug in my head
try to cover my yellow child in the purple sky
laughing,singing,whispering,playing
seven days and seven hours before he dies.


Details | Lyric | |

Under the Eclipse: For Amanda Todd

October speaks of death, I hope now she can rest,
And lay the soaring bird on down.
Underneath her clothes, only herself she loathed.
We've seen this done before. 

Together they manifest their cause, ripping with their claws,
Tearing flesh and bone.
From the shame inside swelling at her sides,
She broke herself on stones. 

And the monsters say "There's on her to blame,
With many heads we only think the same".
When no words of solace leave our lips,
I can tell you the world will end like this,
Under the Eclipse. 

All around they slayed and left where she laid
To bleed out all her wrongs.
And now that she's gone, over with and done,
Her memories all they play. 

She can show you how people lose their sanity.
She can show you how the world has lost humanity.
Those who turned their eyes, this has only you to blame.
To console yourself you say "Oh what a shame".
I can tell you how the world will end like this,
Under the Eclipse,
Under the Eclipse.

Wool across my eyes,
Shields me from this life.
Every single thread
Coating what they said.

Every drop of rain
Lights a candle in
Memory of the one
Who burned for others fun. 

She can show you how people lose their sanity.
She can show you how the world has lost humanity.
Those who turned their eyes, this has only you to blame.
To console yourself you say "Oh what a shame".
I can tell you how the world will end like this,
Under the Eclipse,
Under the Eclipse.

Where is the sun?
Where is the sun?


Details | Haiku | |

Abrupt

Sleeping in sorrow
If I don't wake tomorrow
Then all will be well.


Details | Rhyme | |

Subject of Negative Thinking

I'm a continuous subject of negative thinking.
 Death became my best friend and in his presence is where I longed to be. 
Self mutilation became my better half. 
Every night the blade to my skin as I reached satisfaction once I saw red.
The subject of negative thinking. 
No type of encouragement mattered. 
The negativity becoming my everything. 
My fuel. Suicide being my plan B. 
The subject of negativity constantly searching for positivity.


Details | Lyric | |

Borderline's Wreckage

I'm Agonizing every Word that my mind Creates You've done this all to me release your wrath to Me You wonder How much a Human Heart can take I've reached the limit You've invaded me on every level none of this is Mine anymore I can't bleed enough for You We're through This, This Torture Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You Feel Free to abuse If it's you I won't lose The Winds push away The Vines pull forth I'm at a lose on what to do So very lost and Confused Don't say we're through Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You I Hate you ...Don't leave me I push you so far away But need you so close I'm on the edge you're all I really need I'll do anything Just don't Abandoned me leaving has it's toll Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You


Details | Lyric | |

Why Must It Be

Can I let you go? Will you be okay? Where you're headed now...to a better place Listen to my words of forgiveness relieving this pain I'd give anything to have you back again To hold you once more in my arms, one more day of happiness you now dwell within my heart Your innocent smile is forever a distant memory, and the times that we share are precious treasures that I spend reliving The Shadow of Death Took you in just one breath Why must it be? I cry behind this closed door, searching desperately for an answer, yet all I feel is an emptiness inside... despair haunts me forevermore Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave? Why does this have to hurt? Cancer robbed thy life from thee... Why must it be? Fly away Angel Child of Mine Trod thy broken paths, roam away, fly and be free... Why must it be?


Details | Ballad | |

Violet

In London, away in a terrace
Half-hidden with elm trees and grime,
Lived young Violet, in her parents' house,
Left alone for near all of the time,

As her mother had no patience to teach her
And her father was working all day,
Violet read to herself through her childhood
Forgetting her seclusion in play,

Any friends she made as a young woman
Would laugh at her stitches and cloth,
For they knew that Violet was quite useless
And so showed their neat needlework off,

Poor Violet kept trying her best, but
Each time everyone ran her down,
She retreated back into her mind's warmth
Far away from that cold-blooded town,

Then one night, as the raindrops were piercing
Through the rueful, restricting twilight,
Violet threw on her Sunday attire and
Did at once in the darkness delight,

So she ran through the alleys and gardens,
Dancing down the pitch-black London streets,
Her beautiful dress flew about her
As she skipped past the other deceits,

Violet's stories swam round in her memory
As she flew through the night and the stars,
And she bathed thoroughly and with relish
Until Violet was cleansed of her scars,

Now her heart was open and happy,
So she laughed and fluttered her tail,
Carelessly gliding free through the water
And onwards to the ocean did sail.

As the weary sun rose on the next day
Her friends could be seen on the pier,
Dabbing at their dry eyes with their hankies,
Voices straining trying to sound sincere,

"It has hurt us so indescribably,
That because of her poorly-sewn hems,
Violet felt she was inferior to us
And has drowned herself in the Thames."

Violet's parents had not yet noticed
The absence of their only daughter,
And they would understand even less
How she came to be dead underwater,

But Violet was now free to prosper,
To swim and to dance and to glide,
And with angels and mermaids to play with,
She would always in her dreams reside.


Details | Lyric | |

Tears

A great day ending in tragedy
now you wait until you get the news
I was scattered in different forms
The car door was slammed into my side
The doctor walks in to give you the news
You fall to the floor
Tears falling from your face
Your makeup running down unto your clothes
Making a stain where your heart used to be
I took you back into the darkest place of my soul
Something was different more darker than before
Now you wait until the funeral of your lost love
Your standing in the corner
Your face is covered in darkness
The blood runs from your eyes
How it hurts in the worst way now that im gone
Your realizing how much i meant to you
Something you havent seen before
Your blindness fades away as you start to see
You fall to the floor fainting
No one picks you up
They drop my casket into my little hole
Where i will stay all life long
How your tears fall unto the ground
Getting soaked up by the soil
Drowning me in your tears
Admire the past no more ways to see the future
Now that your starting to love me more
You wait until you see me in a dream
Dying like the past
As your moving on i fade away
I am no longer alive
You left me behind


Details | I do not know? | |

The Light

~The Light~

I remember the first time
 Voices in my head getting way too loud
Just a little girl unable to enjoy the world around me
I thought there was no way out
Almost took the easy way out
Then I saw something shining at the end of a long dark tunnel
It gave me hope
A reason to believe
As long as I kept my focus on

~The Light~

Thirteen and so very young
Afraid to tell a soul
About the demons in my head
I thought that I had to deal with them 
For myself by myself
Until I slipped and told a friend
Finding out she heard them sometimes too
Helped me feel a little better
It is just too bad she never had a chance to see
Brightness at the end of her tunnel
After she moved away
She just gave up 
Walking away from 

~The Light	~

I felt so bad 
Yet I managed to hide the pain
I always felt inside
Even in my darkest hours
With many attempts behind me 
I kept hoping to see

~The Light~

It is beautiful to see how a family can rescue 
Their fallen 
Just not giving up
Always feeling their unconditional love 
Knowing they were there
It all helped me walk out of that dark tunnel
Embracing

~The Light~

Now I firmly believe it is possible
For the most troubled soul
To find a way out
Without taking the easy way
With love and support
I know you can do it too
As you go through life’s journey
Wherever it may take you 
Always remember to look for and 
Embrace 

~The Light	~

By: Jean Shular


Details | Ballade | |

Now You Win

He used to give her roses
he used to make her smile
he always said he loved her
but it only lasted for a while

he used to be so nice
told her stories of his past
he used to treat her like a princess
but this love did not last

He started calling her names
soon slammed her to the floor
began to play all kinds of games
her heart soon broken and tore

must have been her fault
every guy has done this to her before
i must tell you her story 
because she isn't with us anymore

she wrote a letter
that told of her life 
nothing was getting better 
she began to use a knife

this is the letter
no one has ever read
the life that plagued her
and this is what it said

Dear whoever,
I couldn't take it anymore
my life so full of pain
my world fell around me
i soon was drove insane

I'd come home with bruises
marks around my neck
I'd have to cover my wounds
my life soon became a wreck

I started to slice 
crimson puddles began to pour
i now write you this letter 
as i lie weak on the floor

I cannot wait to leave this place
no one here with a care
I can now leave without a trace
knowing that no one is aware

I cannot wait to see
how every one will react
when they finally see what hes done to me
and all the courage that i lack

I know that you'll all be happy
no longer have to see
that somewhere in this world 
i the one writing longs to be free

now i must say goodbye
with no one to say it to
when all my life was based on lies
what else was there for me to do?

so when you look in the sky
just think Matt of what you've done
your always saying you win?
not this is the time that you have won!


Details | Narrative | |

The Saddest Story Known to the Human Heart

He sped home, 
His hands covered with desperation
Pedal down to the cold of the floor
His mind clouded with hesitation

She stood alone on the porch,
Her hands covered with damnation
Heart cold from the winter night
She was yearning for the liberation

Tears streamed from down his eyes
The night was clouded like a horror movie
Breaths are heavy and cold with perspiration
Thinking, “How could she do this to me?”

Her legs gave out,
As she collapsed to the floor
Headed to the phone
She crawled to the door

His love burned out,
As he slammed on the gas
Eyes blurred with tears
He was going way to fast

She had to tell him,
He was the love of her life
Phone was cold as she grasped it
She quickly dialed his number in strife

His phone rang in the side of his jeans
He scrambled for it and saw her name
Mind conflicted whether to pick it up
He answered in a crying shame

She hears his voice from the other side
She tells him she loves him and starts to cry
Then it happened
She never got to say goodbye

His speedometer was to the max,
His attention was taken of the street
Head on collision
He had his life swept from under his feet

She heard the crash on the other end
Screamed out his name in an awful blur
And collapsed again to the floor
He never got the chance to say he loved her


Details | Ballad | |

Martyr for the Unorthodox word

If I had over 10,000 dreams You'd be the only thing my mind could see Judgment couldn't be real Succumbing to the fear of this cold life Find a way to break through The self-destruction of wordly delusions Don't tell me I've lived so long in a lovely illusion Break me down until we find a Nirvanic state Then bring me a savior from transgressions An atoning sacrifice Send down to me a messenger for me to submit to Bring me the truth to break through The delusion Bring me the messenger to explain it all And let me leave behind Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Without a will to fight But I have the Means to be free I'll try to go with the word I believe But so many stones to be thrown Stakes to burn, limbs to break Faces to hate, scorns to taste Will I have the will to die Despite all of the tears no one will cry Sorrow's caressing the earth The caliphate stole my heart Broke my will Safetefied my soul Martyr for the Unorthodox word


Details | Free verse | |

Love

I keep hearing that you exist. 
People say they see you-
They touch you.
They say you help them when depressed, sad and lonely.
They say you keep people together- forever.
Some even say you do not work all the time;
You have a tendency to fade away-
Only for a short time, however,
For you can return to set things back to norm.
I'm curious- love.
Do you really return?-
Do you really fade away?-
Do you really keep people together- forever?-
Do you really console the depressed, sad and lonely?-
For I am sad, lonely and depressed.
Will not you help me?
Why ignore me?-
Or forget me?
Why listen to what others have to say about me?
I tried to reach for you too-
You just could not see.
For sadness, depression and loneliness kept you blind;
Blind from watching my hands reach out to you...
You fell-
Long gone-
Never came back.
Do not worry-
I keep hearing that you exist.
Tis' true?- 
Do you really- 
Exist?


Details | Free verse | |

Writer's Block Is More Like Death

Drained of words. 
The flow has ceased and the imagination is bled dry of originality. 
I'm left flipping through my past 
Scratched in ink across these pages. 

Thoughts long forgotten seemingly infantile, 
Paling in comparison to anything that's recently infested my mind. 
I sit in a cold room, locked away from the world 
Curled in the corner with a pen 
Stabbing into my skin hoping to grasp some idea of pain 
To cause a flood as I have times before. 

Theories I drew up in my rebellious youth circulate in my blood 
Causing a twisted sense of self-pride feeding my bitterness. 
My flesh is drained of color, painted with the whites and dusted yellows 
Of headlights passing through the blinds hanging limp over the window. 

I burn, burn away into the previous day 
Where I wasn't dependent on these words that keep me from jumping out of my 
skin. 
Sucking on the scents lingering in the air from nightmares to gain some 
inspiration 
I find myself dangling on the brink of insanity and mental collapse, 
Surrendering myself to the fear of another failure. 
Giving up to the truth that I'm living with the assurance 
That only cold soil and a glossy maple-wood box wait for me at the end, 
If I could afford even that.


Details | I do not know? | |

Epitaph

Remember me
The light that stalked the shadows
Remember me
A moonbeam to soften the night
Remember me
When the gates finally lock
Remember me
After the flowers wilt and fall


Details | Rhyme | |

A Boy in the Rain

A crying child stands
Alone
Wet eyes and trembling hands
Quietly turn to stone

What is the cause?
Who can be blamed?
Time doesn't pause
For a boy in the rain


Details | Free verse | |

Words Hurt Worse

She lays there alone
Looking at the sky
She thinks of that saying,the one about sticks and stones
And says softly to herself "Thats a lie."
That day she had been called a pig,a *****, and a mutt
She had also been told she was fat,worthless,and scary
She wonders if she really is a slut
Soon she became ever so wary
Then she slowly sits up and draws out her knife
She thinks about that little trophy wife
Who muttered the 6 words "She should take her own life"
Slowly that girl puts her knife to her chest
As the words "Kill yourself" run through her mind
She stabs the knife into her chest just like the rest
If only one person had been kind...
Now she falls back into a lay
Wondering how long it will take for someone to find her
A year? A month? A day?
Everything fades into a blur 
She takes her last breath
Then finally she reaches her death


Details | I do not know? | |

Alone A Tree In Mourning

A single bee
Alone a tree.
A single day in morning.
His slicker sly 
Of catching eyes.
His sweeter side of aging.
Like sticky seeds,
These blossom beads.
The winter plants are dying.
A drunken bee
Flies lazily,
Brought down by nectar drinking.

Our springs are wet
With sweet forgets.
Our hearts forever bleeding.
Our summers heat,
These days retreat,
Our only summer setting.
Our summers die
In lullabies.
I wish I wont stop dreaming.
A passer by
I might ask why
Alone a tree in morning?

And possibly 
He’d die to be 
My only glimpse of fleeting.
Without a care 
Our pulses dare
To reach the height of running.
A gentle sigh,
An open mind,
Holds within each waiting.

His ancient cry
Of reasons why.
His simple song of saving.
I'll never die 
He'll say tonight
While other dawns are breaking.
A passer by,
I might ask why
Alone a tree in mourning? 


Details | I do not know? | |

~Unforgiving Soul~

Life can be beautiful and long. Or life could be short and depressing. Some people 
act happy when they are sad. Their anger will grow and only get mad.  Fear to live 
can be so strong. Some people will cut life short before they're time. They feel 
the only way out is suicide. For death is a gift that God gave us. But love is a 
choice that some don't follow. The hatred rejection breathes can turn you hallow. 
Your eyes tell the truth of an unforgiving soul. The darkness you seek is out of 
control. One day at a time it consumes you. Then at last your finally threw. You 
are bitter and heartless, angered, and cold. Sooner or later your evil will unfold. 
You have gone into hiding and left the light. Any chance you get you try to fight. 
The pain you buried so many years ago. The scars and fears of an unforgiving soul. 
Your day will come and you will forgive. The child you saved was abandoned and 
hide. Your life is peaceful and calm. Your little baby will grow up happy and 
strong. You saved a life and got yours back. You had so much pain and rage filled 
attacks. You can sleep without the dreams of a viscous man. Everything is Better 
now you can finally think. You stop and wonder why he took that last drink? Why he 
abused your young body? Where he was when he hid? Why he did the things he did? 


Details | Free verse | |

From Death's Embrace

life's efforts, in vain they shattered 
velvet cloaks of crimson tattered 
alone in darkness, they never mattered 
blades glisten, the sad eyes they flattered 

hand out-stretched, he stood alone 
fingers gleamed white of bone 
eerie whispers of prayers unknown 
no actions friends of God would condone 

leaning in with scythe in hand 
hollowed eyes of black depths command 
veins bled dry making stand 
against the embrace of Death's demand


Details | I do not know? | |

I miss u(R.I.P Velma j Smith)

I miss you mom,
and I could tell you a million reasons why
the way you use to take care of me
when I was sick or in need at night or day.
and sometimes when I wasn't happy
maybe I'll be depressed,sad,or mad
You would always come to comfort me and make me laugh and smile
I miss u mom
so very,very much
i sometimes just miss u so much until,I'll curve your name in my arm,or just began to 
cry just thinking of u.
I miss u mom,
why did the man above have to take your life away?
i only got to be with u for 9 years that's it
that's not even enough time,for all of the year i got before me without u in my life
I miss u mom.
i sometimes see u in my dreams at night
and in my mind all of the time
i love and miss u a lot
but i try not to think of u that much,because it hurts so bad when i cry a river of 
tears,just for u
but i guess that's a good thing mom
because I'm still loving u and will always love,miss and respect u
even though your gone to a better place...
I MISS U MOM.


Details | Free verse | |

Nothing More To Do With You

This ends right now.
Confided in me then threw it all away
There can be no love left within me
Angerfeardisappointmentdespair
But you've lost it all now - I've given up on you.

He's got you doing I don't know what
And the rumours are rumours but the rumours are true

And if I saw him I swear
I'd smash his face in.
Could do with another outlet after all
These stabbing shrieks inside my chest
Scraping at my flesh and bone
Won't let them penetrate me

See her; who is she?
Wonder if you know her
She's everything you pretended to be
Emotionless beneath that metal
Trusting no-one still being betrayed

Who are they in the frame with her?
These strangers who casually call themselves friends
You're so stupid
They couldn't care less
Watch you stagger and fuel the habits they helped you start

Mindless idiot.
She's going to die and she's taking you with her

Don'tpiercethatdon'tsmokethatdon'ttakethat
What more can I do when you block me out?
Sleep around black out come to me for comfort
Crazy little girl, could slash you and let all the bad rush out
But then of course we'd have nothing left
And it grieves me that it's come to this
Can't stand it anymore; you're on your own you've got a choice you'll make the 
wrong decision I can't be there to guide you

Confided in you then threw it all away
Can't keep these lame promises and I know
I said I'd always be there
But I was there for you and I'm talking to myself 'cause you're dead on the inside
And it's spreading fast.

Not one redeeming feature
Could rip you apart wouldn't harm you for the world
Save you from it all leave you there for them to get you
And they won't find my girl, person worth protecting
Her and you'll be there instead already gone already dead
You all shall scream
Won't turn my head

And I'll remember you today
For what you used to be
Days that seem too far away

You're ugly now in every way.


Details | Rhyme | |

Death Wish

The nauseated feeling from knowing that I have thoughts to take my own life. 
Suicide not only being a feeling, a second thought, but a compromise.
Now sick to my stomach with disbelief, how I imagine at the end of my life-the 
painful grief.
And my funeral, what church would take me? The sinner who took her own life, in 
my casket the devil might as well be.
And yet the thought constantly crosses my mind:
Why not die? Death is simply the beginning of life.
Although life is well and sometimes I'm happy. 
I can't help but wonder how death would be.
People always say "at least their in a better place." 
So is death better than life? In death can I go my own pace?
Once again nauseated with the thought of taking my own life. Myself I can no 
longer love, me I can only despise!!!



Details | I do not know? | |

Unless Otherwise Noted

Tempting it is to end it all
Overwhelming depression, Nothing but a normal day
Will I ever be able to put it down
The blade that has become my passage
To not a home nor place at all
But a moment trapped in time to relive
Clinging to life like a starved leech
It never seems to cut deep enough
I'll end mine to save hers
Once again I am selfless
Her wish was my command
Then I got trown into the sun
She was given everything
And asked for nothing
So in effort to alleviate her angst
I will condemn myself 
My needs never mattered to anybody
So I will rid the world of my disease
Unless otherwise noted


Details | I do not know? | |

Crying So Hard I Was Screaming

I cried so hard I wanted to scream 
Your memory still brings bleeding tears to my cheeks
The thoughts of you, me, and us are killing me
Why cant the pain inside just be a bad dream.
I want to wake up in your loving arms 
But my eyes are closed by the tears of my heart.
Everything around me is crashing down
There’s nothing left for me to do but drown
I want to call your name with my last breath
But I’m screaming so loud that my breath is dead 

I was screaming so loud that I wanted to cry
I knew everything was over the moment u left my side
Hold me and tell me everything will be fine
Otherwise, blow out the flame that burns for you
And bury my heart in the deepest grave
Let me drown in a sea of bloody tears 
With the sound of my screams ringing through your ears.
Maybe then you’ll know that my love was real.

I’m screaming so loud that I’m crying 
And I’m crying so hard that I’m screaming
There’s nothing that can ever make this feeling subside.

				
  


Details | I do not know? | |

Kisses

Kisses can be powerful 
Kisses can change a little 
Girls heart to open and 
love the world once again.
Because she now sees how 
important the world is to
her and even though her
daddy is no longer living he
still wants her to know that 
he still loves her and that 
he thinks of her all the time 
and he watches out for her 
even when she's asleep. And
he wants her to be happy and
to be proud of herself and the 
world around her even though 
she thinks she can make it 
on her own in the back of
her mind she knows she will
need help and even though she 
may not agree with every thing 
there is to know about 
the world. but if there is 
one thing she can agree on 
it's that her daddy loves 
her with every kiss from 
the sky above. And every 
time the Wind blows it's 
her daddy talking to her. If
she would only listen a little 
closer she would be able to understand.


Details | I do not know? | |

rip lips 06

the death of my brother was a tragedy,the thought of him keeps me awak ,i 
remember like it was just  yesterday, me coming home from memorial at 7:30pm 
remembering nobody wanting me to know, knowing i'd go crazy. what you know i 
did knowing the closet thing to me is gone.


Details | Elegy | |

The Lost Boy

There was a boy I used to know.
He never let his feelings show.
Turns out he wanted suicide.
When he died, I cried.
Why did he have to go?
Was that why he never let his feelings show?
He hung himself like a criminal.
That’s not what he was like at all.
He still had time to grow.
Maybe he should’ve let his feelings show.
There was a boy I used to know. 


Details | Verse | |

I'm Going Home

,

Lord thank you for this life,
As I have lived a full life,
It was not always as I would have like,
But I lived it to the best of what I could,
I’m going home; Home to the place I want to be,
I’m going home to Jesus where He waits for me,
I have been a long weary believer, 
As I’ve been away to long,
I now know what I’ve been searching for, 
As He's been there in me all along,
I’m going home; Home is the place I want to be,
I’m going home to Jesus where He waits for me,
I have been and seen lots of places in life’s journey,
Now I yearn for familiar faces in familiar places,
I hear familiar voices calling me to come home, 
I see familiar faces looking at me,
I’m going home; Home is the place I want to be,
I’m going home to Jesus where He waits for me,
My time is near, the hour I know not,
I see Jesus' face across the Heaven’s,
I hear His soft sweet voice calling me home,
 I can’t wait for my real life to begin,
I’m going home; Home is the place I want to be,
I’m going home to Jesus where He waits for me.

By; Rev. Samuel and Esta Mack, OMS
Copyright 2011

VISIT US AT: http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Lyric | |

Special

To capture the attention everyone else gets but you
You do whatever you can to get it
Even if its bad
You continue to do it
To get the attention you never had
And the attention you will never get
You want the perfect body and soul that everyone else has
You want to feel important... special
So you seek for a better
Much higher thing
What you need
You dont quite know
But you decide that
You will do whatever it takes to make you happy
And sometimes
That means..
suicide
Sometimes it means
Shooting someone
Because the hole inside your heart needs filled
And thats the only thing you ever had
The only thing you see
The only thing that someone gave to you
The thing that got everyone talking about you
The thing that got everyone to even look at you
So if you decide to kill someone
You kill yourself afterwards
Because you felt lonely again
You felt that no one was watching you
That no one even cared 
Then you think about all the things that 
Bugged you
And you pull the trigger
Then theres no more you
Next time someone sees you
You will be on the news
Where now you are special
And important


Details | Elegy | |

The Lament For an Angel

All in one faded-black day (but let None forget) In my arms, her body lay (my life was the price to pay) A tragedy, through the lack of humanly shame (do they know pain) My darkly colleen has to suffer no more (Robert nor do you) Let me die (please hear my haunted cries) If I can not see Sophie tonight (live on with my grey) I'm just a mess of despairing words And broken nerves Another mourning, afflicted sight (through decay, love can remain) Solace, sympathy are just more lies She is all I need Until you decide she is just another sadist's toy My Angel, why did you have to fly so far away My Angel, just let one feather stay My Angel has flown away My Angel, why did you have to fly so far away My Angel, just let one feather stay My Angel has flown away (My body is amortal, die I may, Together, our hearts will forever stay)


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Trip on, Trip up

Walk before you speak.
Lend your voice that seek.
Foot forward and back.
So will that be a fact.
Gone by and be well.
Trip up and put into a cell.
Got no one to talk to.
I want a phone call to sue.
When I wake from my slumber.
I wish not to be hit by lumber.
Going to become a dreamer.
I hope that I do not become a screamer.
I got new shoes.
With colorful strings that are loose.
I am slow on tying them.
I feel they are harder than stem.
String are not new.
They smell pew.
I walk once again to journey.
That means I need some money.
Trip up again with meaningless acts.
Walking with out trust that lacks.
Shamefulness I speak.
I go behind a tree to leak.
I have no home set in stone.
Wheeling and dealing always alone.
Since I was a child that was left on the street.
I became a street beat.
Strolling with confidence to day.
Making my way.
Some law men stop me.
I was so out of it that they can see.
They thought I was on drugs.
I was really itching bugs.
Stumbling because I have not eaten.
So they grab me and I got beaten.
They finally found me innocent.
So I told them to get bent.
I was a good citizen with high hopes.
The society today thinks I am on dopes.
Can I be help with no pain.
Will they put me some were I will gain.
So I was put into a helpful place.
I was then able to eat and say grace.
Some crazy person came in and started shooting. 
So people ran and started looting.
Cannot get away from bad luck.
Sure enough I feel so stuck.
Knowing that I was fleeing.
I became worth not seeing.
I lay there my time just feeling has pass.
Losing my mind and running out of gas.
Finally I hear a person the sound sounds so weak.
A life time that I wanted to seek.
Found myself in a bed.
Down to nothing I was shed.
A person with white clothes that said your in luck.
You survived and now you owe some buck.
So sad not really glad.
Bad thing was the kid that was shooting was my lad.
Time really passes I just want to walk.
To see my kid to talk.
Why did he do what he did.
Dad he said I was starving and I am a kid.
So I have turn to a life time of crime.
Dad do not give me your time.
Because when we talked long ago.
You just left home with all the doe.
Hope you have a good life.
Because mom had been a good wife.
Now it is your turn.
So you can walk into the fire and burn.
With out a doubt you will walk away.
Trip on and Trip up and you will never pay.
Now dad keep your love.
Because I seek my mother above.
You will be chain.
Down you go insane.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

All Day Long

All. Day. Long.

I sit there, in my chair, All. Day. Long. 
Glaring at people I hate. 
The people who are but mere memories.
Mere dust in the wind.

All that I know has blown away, 
taken by my faulty actions.
The dull replay of Meteora fills my room with lyrical insanity, 
tempting me with beat and anger. 
But I’ve realised it’s not the music that’s dull.
It’s myself. I am dull. 
 Dull, empty, detached, dead. 
My actions have caused this, my mental instability.

My arms and wrists, they’re crisscrossed with faint pink patterns,
the product of my attempts at reattachment and relief.
Eternal smiles of violet beneath my eyes, wrinkles surround my lips. 
My skin, yellow from the drugs, reflects weakly the sunlight from outside.
I blame everyone but myself, my personality rotten to the core.
My lungs, as well, shredded by smoke that acted like needles.

I couldn’t help myself, I jest in my mind. 
I’ve been trying to shove the blame onto something but myself, 
only to find there is nothing to blame but myself.

My body has been wracked to this state, 
a state well beyond my mere 29 years. 
My mind, hanging from a cliff. 
Threatening to free fall at any moment. 

As I sit there, in my chair, 
memories of an age long gone from my life flash before my eyes.
 A girl I loved, laughing.
 Her and I lying in the grass, at a lake’s edge.
A cat akin to night, eyes green as mine, purring softly in my lap.
Flashes of guns, from a war forgotten by all but me. 

As I reminisce these memories, a spark of feeling—pain.
Upwelling in my gut.
 Through my chest.
 Stabbing into the side of my head.
The pain triggers a new wave of recollection. 

Again, the girl. My mind so foggy I can’t remember her name. 
Dancing slowly to a song no longer heard of. 
Snow. A blush of the cheeks. Hands in mine, warming and comfortable.
The pain in my head intensifies, blinding me. 
I fall from my chair, the first time I’ve moved all day. In 2 days.

Shaking my head, I pull myself up. Standing, I look around. 
Another flash of pain, followed by a sensation I’d all but forgotten.
Her lips. At dusk. The very first time.
I stumble away from an unseen being, crashing into the wall. 
Blinking my eyes furiously, I right myself. 
Waiting a moment, I sit back down. 
And let the dullness take over, the pain ebb away, 
and the memories to replay.
All. Day. Long.


Details | Narrative | |

Two Seconds To Say Goodbye

It buzzed.
She smiled.
He had replied.
Eagerly she dug
Her phone
From her pocket,
Her other hand
On the wheel.
Her gaze remained ahead
Into the darkness
Of the cold wintery night.
It buzzed again,
The screen illuminating
The shadows of the car.
Would he be there?
Would he come over
After his shift at work
Was done?
“What did he say?”
Another young voice replied.
“Give me the phone.”
She hesitated,
Not fully trusting
Her friend.
Besides,
She wanted to know.
She wanted to see the words.
She wanted feel
The exhilaration
Of reading his words
To HER.
She glanced down,
The screen now dark,
And fumbled
To press the keys.
“He’s coming,” she said
Trying to calm
The enthusiasm
In her voice.
Her heart beat harder.
How did she look?
What should she reply?
Gr8 C U L8T
In the same 2 seconds, she could have typed
Goodbye.


Details | Rhyme | |

Happiness in a Wrong way

Happiness in a Wrong way – Zamreen Zarook

In the notion of seeking happiness,
I thought of stepping in to nonsense,
I dream I could find success,
But I had only little access.

Every attempt that I lend,
It was an utter failure at the end,
My life was full of difficult bend,
But God is always there as a good friend.

My deeds travel in various ways,
Some times in subways,
Or in times it goes in highways,
But I had the belief, God is there always.

North and south families surrounded,
East and west friends are rounded,
Every time fear on death soughed,
I am trapped, and my merits are loaded.


Details | Prose | |

Suicide Note - A Prose -

The razor blade held to his wrist shows pain, 
mourning, and anything else. 
You see, he just wants someone to understand him,
care for him, and love him as their own.
His mother and father argue over the tiniest things.
 
Cut one starts, he doesn't feel the relief yet.
Peers and students tease him for being bubbly and happy. 
But no one has seen this dark and twisted part of his mind.
 
Cut two stings just a bit, a sting from a wasp. 
His friends don’t care, they have their own mediocre lives to deal with.
 
Cut number three murders the emotional pain.
No one cares that he does this.
Everyone presses on in their own lives,
paying taxes and making love.

He grabs his father’s pistol from under his parents’ bed.
He writes this letter, and then pulls the trigger.


Details | Free verse | |

Love, Death, and Rebirth

The signs started in December
When she started waking up in tears each night
She was a normal girl with dark brown hair and darker brown eyes
She had plenty of friends and a loving family with just one thing missing
Her father. 

Days passed by and turned into weeks but only felt like a few seconds
Her life just whizzed by faster and faster until it was just a whirr in front of her eyes
Darkness filtered into her heart and mind until she didn't know if she could go on
But she had to. She couldn't let her mother and her sister drown in this same pain
She wouldn't let them.

She pushed all the darkness into the depths of her own heart
In hopes to save the hearts of the two people she had left
Because what else was there to live for now?
The rest of her world had crashed and her mother and sister was all that was left 
She wouldn't let them drown in pain too. 

She watched as they started to heal in her loving arms
Their hearts started to lighten up once more
But hers was just as dark as it was before 
And growing darker day by day 
But she wouldn't let that stop her. 

Suddenly a year had passed... and then two 
It only seemed like seconds to her but everyone else started moving on
Her mother and sister no longer needed her nurturing care
But she needed someone to hold on to
Anyone...

With nothing left for her to take control of, the dark pushed past her boundries 
It found a way into her soul
Until all she could see was dark and no light 
But her mother and sister were healed now
They didn't understand

The tears came back and engulfed her soul
Bit by bit until she wasn't sure why she was still alive
The grief took over like knives 
Piercing her skin over and over and over
It hurt so much.

She started to wonder what it'd look like to be dead
She could see him again if she was
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to endure this pain?
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to live knowing she'd never see him again?
It would.

So she started to hate herself
All that negative energy was starting to take toll
Everyone around her was breathing while she suffocated more and more by the second
She wished she'd just choke already instead of living in constant pain
If no one would put her out of her misery, she'd have to do it herself

She couldn't see any light anymore
So she grabbed the pill bottle off the shelf and just hoped it wouldn't take long to die
Deep down she still had a spark of light, but she just couldn't find it 
And now it was too late in her mind to change, to turn back and try to look deeper
She was done living.

That's when people started to notice that everything wasn't as peaceful as it seemed
They started to see how deeply depressed she had become
They wanted to help her see the light again before it was too late 
So they sent her away to see doctors and to take pills to make everything better
It was a start.

She didn't see a change at first but suddenly she could think clearly
Maybe what they were doing was actually going to help her see the light again
Yes, she still wanted to die, but maybe that wasn't the only option anymore
They cared,  and behind all their own problems they were trying to understand
They really were trying

Six months longer she would be treated and cared for
Until suddenly she was sent home from her treatment and care with a smile on her face
She had a new perspective
Someone had helped her ignite that spark in her heart until it was a glowing ember
She had been reborn

Sometimes you have to be able to experience the worst of it
To come back shining brighter than before
And if she had died that cold day in October, she wouldn't of ever seen the best of it
Or known that it would get better
and it did!

And she now sits at her laptop, with a smile on her face and warmth in her heart
It's never been an easy road and it won't ever be
But at least she knows she's lived through the worst
And it can only get better from here

So whenever she feels lonely or gets back into that dark spot again
She can look back on what she's learned and can read this poem
And remember that she survived the darkest depths of depression
And she will continue to survive it as long as she lives
Because she is stronger now than she ever was before ?


Details | Villanelle | |

Its Nice

I guess everything I did or do is not good enough for you,
This Mr Nice guy is not working out to your standards isn't it true.
What are you asking for from me, would you like the beast unleashed,
like it was before I turned into an angel that was kissed? 

You have been asking for it, for a long time now,
the beast wants to tear out of my skin and make you drown. 
Kill you and devour you piece by piece,
than spit you out into hell where you'll burn like the trees. 

What haven't I given you that you have treated me this way,
I show you live and care but you burned my heart like a pile of hay. 
So for my final words, be cautious of the daemon YOU have unleashed,
Cause one wrong move and your body will be incomplete.


Details | Free verse | |

If Old Men Fought

An old man looking out his door,
gaze fixed on a distant shore,
reminiscing to a time, not of happiness,
or, the prospect of a bright future,
to when he was sick to his very core,
to when as a youth, he went to war

A time before infallibility had meaning,
patriotism and bravado the craze,
the future was still unknown,
vigor for life at its all time high,
a time for romance, partying, buying,
no thought of pain, deformity, dying

Too young to understand or question,
ship to foreign shore, medals abound,
will impress the girls next time in town,
sacrifice not temporary,
forever more,
a legacy etched into a wall, few will remember,
flesh shredded, burned, torn,
families mourn

A time, when he willingly went to war,
will happen no more,
all lost in youth, now unrelenting,
no blind obedience,
minimal risk,
long life, his number one ambition

As he turns back from the door,
he thinks of the youth,
here now, soon no more,
lessons never learned,
the call to war,
to common the roar,
complacency the mood,
another generation removed

The old man agonizes
over what was originally not known,
war is preventable,
life too precious to waste,
the solution simple,
his vision, maybe too late

Send old men to the front to fight,
arthritis, heart disease, poor eyesight,
let the youth enjoy their life,
his near over, its only right

Send old men, to the front, to fight
ask them to give up their life,
patriotism and bravado, still alive,
will and desire would not last the night,
old men do not rush to death in their twilight,
failure inevitable, the old man smiles,
knows he's right

Wars not possible,
if old men, are sent to fight


Details | I do not know? | |

Dear little sister from another mister

You’ve been thrown left and right,
Crying to yourself every night,
Thinking all has gone wrong,
& you won’t be giving up after long..
You’ve been heartbroken 
One
Two many times:
From old boyfriends,
To lies;
Father walked out,
Baby killed by mistake;
Your mom has disowned you,
But she still shows you lust…
Everybody knows the truth,
The pain that you do not choose;
They see what you show,
But see me…
I, T’Keyah Wilder,
I already know…
You’ve raped and thrown from left to right;
Crying to yourself every night;
Everybody saying they understand,
But you know you’re the only
One who knows your pain ;
On this land…
It’s a matter of time, 
Before you kill yourself,
Stressing yourself,
Hurting you and everyone else;
Blaming yourself for,
Mistakes not purposely made;
Crying every time you feel like you just got 
Laid,
You want the true love,
Love shown from the heart;
Honestly,
Coming from your big sister; 
I think you need a fresh start,
Easing your pain with nicotine;
I’m surprised you’re not 
Sippin lean…
I know it may be hard,
To forget about the past,
But there’s one thing;
I must ask from you and I 
Want this to last;
Promise me, you’ll try your best
To stress less,
& pray more…
Listen to God;
Put him above…
All;
We’re not close like we used to be,
But you know I’m just a phone call,
Away…
Not far from you..
But I wish you’d  realize,
This too…
Stressing is not working,
Cause death, the devil, lies,
& fear are lurking..
Promise me;
You’ll try to be the best you can be…
Dear Little Sister from another Mister!
<3 RiP auntie bby ; djF .


Details | Free verse | |

The Humans and I

Ones who wage,
Ones who rage,
Ones who take,
Ones who pay,
Ones who craze,
Ones who rave,
Ones who crave…

Ones who fear,
Ones who breathe,
Ones who give,
Ones who need,
Ones who will,
Ones who weave…

Ones who plead,
Ones who beg,
Ones who beseech,
Ones who entreat,
Ones who appeal,
Ones who volunteer,
Ones who disappear…

The ones who follow,
The ones that don’t know about tomorrow,
The ones who don’t deserve the morrow…

The ones who sleep,
The ones who cry,
The ones who live,
The ones who die…

The ones who proclaim,
Those who say they create,
The ones who ache,
The ones who don’t wait,
The ones who hesitate,
The ones who don’t concentrate,
The ones who fornicate,
The ones who procrastinate…

Those who fall in temptation,
Those who get in frustration,
Those who sometimes feel desperation,
Those who keep going without caution,
Those in motion,
Those in tension,
Those losing notion,
Those being poisoned,
Those getting in distortion,
Those following the broken diction,
Those dying like the billions,
Those without unction,
Those washed in the oceans…

I might seem cold,
But it is you who is bold.
I might not express,
But it is you who doesn’t let me progress.
I might not seem like I seek,
But it is you who doesn’t know me…
I might seem like I need,
But it is you who might always be begging on your knees.
I might seem dull,
But it is the one that is fool.
I might not be alight,
But it is you who isn’t truly alive…

I will remain neutral,
I will remain silver,
I will remain gray,
I feel darkness,
I feel light,
I will remain hallowed…,
After all, it is you who deserves no life…

I am a metal hawk,
I am a mountain goat,
I am a silver bird,
I am a gray wolf,
I am a white tiger,
I am a mystic rose…,
I am I…

I’m alive,
And I survive,
You are here,
However, it is you who deserves no life…

Being human does not imply that you have humanity…


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To a Dead Man

You Drive me into this Malice, into this Maze I can only see the last of days Your Creation Failed With Me Burn with malice as you bridge to the plains of ennui


Details | Lyric | |

Lacerated Wings

They are bound to the Earth like trees
Suffocating under the weight of an icy grave 
Reaching to be free, but only their limbs are seen
Hoping that one day someone will see:
They can't escape with lacerated wings

The ocean surrounds me, covering everything
Nothing will be clearly seen; confusion overwhelming
No-one can save you, you're on your own, left to die
Manipulating every bleeding heart you can find
I can't escape with lacerated wings.

Swarms of nets, waves of screams 
Entangle: your captive illusions and dreams
The mask has be seared - The truth now they see
The Liar - Vampiric Fiend; lowly thief
And now they know you can't escape with Lacerated Wings

There's reasons for your rejections:
Your Heavy heart's transferred oppression
The scars are too deep to pass the trials
But you can find peace in your cage of empty spirals
You Cannot Escape With Lacerated Wings


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To a Bride Without a Name

Oh Flora, Choral Beauty The Sun Rises With You Out of An Abyss of Chaos, Yet No Piece of Beauty Is Lost I Can't Grant You Nobility, But Our Love's Vitality Will Last Till The Gates of Hades's Halls They Will Push, They Will Pull, And Their Power Will Grow Just To Have A Piece of Our Love's Immortality For It They Cannot Wait Subdued By Desperation's Phantom But I Will Always Be One of Them So, My Dear, Please Understand I'm Just A Chevalier Drenched With My Sins The Hope Will Fade The Rose Will Turn Black The Promise Was Just I Lie, Though I Forbade I Will Just Be Another Empty Heart, Slain By Your Loosening Grip On My Sanity I Will Die, You Will Be Free Believe - It's The Way Things Must Be My Dear, Just Understand


Details | Free verse | |

Murderapolis Streets, Claim Two More Young Heartbeats

Native, Liteskin, sun kissed
smiles
sit, talk, get to know me 
a while
for I am not my skin and 
even though the tan pigment
runs deep
I am my heart, thoughts
and actions,reflection of
company
I keep
A car accident took
my Homies brother this morning
and as we sit and talk to him
now, through faded room mourning
Young man, stole pop’s keys
from sleeping pockets
joy riding with friends
headlights beaming, MN
summer star sky gleaming
Dad's unaware, boy & friends left
 till woke, by early morn’ meeting
God opened the skies and took
two good ones away
I felt it rained, clouds crying briefly
for them today
70 miles an hour, Murderapolis streets
took two good homies heartbeats
jus’ a mile away, a close
friend heard the tires screech
Driver yells to him, “get a knife & cut me out!”
Neighbor, like doe eyes in headlights
filled with doubt
ends up dying after all
at the hospital
down 29th Ave and McKinley St.
Two of the Five Souls involved
God, now, does keep
I recall seeing the drivers smile
less than one week ago
why Mista Watkins & White Jr.
was it yo’ time to go
your loved ones may never know
We don’t always understand
the Lords plan
but He surely knows
heartache and sorrow
is how July fourteenth does go
two significant young Southside sons 
at 3:30 am, drove into a utility pole
crushed glass ridden streets
two homies, with us no mo’
I pray Jesus be with them
and theirs
as they grieve, and friends
surround them with the love
they need
car accidents & tragedies
like these
close to home to you
tend to place things in perspective
defrost a persons mind
set it into view
cuz’ its not about the color, of
your skin, or where you came from
it’s the way you impact the world
in the end, who you’ve grown to
become
the lives lost, were good peoples
Stood for good values like Church steeples
vibrant athletic youths of the future
barely 14 & 17, gone too soon
I hear the sad, cry, lonely night of our
Loon
Murderapolis streets, claim
two more young heartbeats
you will forever be remembered
and loved, keep an eye on us
from above, we know you’re
in a better place, were all running
an impossible to win race
for we all have a time card to punch
under the Lords undying grace
your Influence and charm, young men
is locked within us
Safe
and we shall all party again
in the Kingdom of Heaven
our final resting Place

7/15/2010: R.I.P.- Patrick Watkins (17) & Duane White Jr. (14)- South Side, Minneapolis, MN
you are forever loved and missed, but not forgotten, watch us from Heaven, Amen


Details | Sonnet | |

Without You

Define your lovely, soulless heart in death
 To take my heart would be a risk; a storm
 You licked your lips to taste what i had left
 And jumped from cliff to rocks, i was forlorn.
 Upon my lover; roses wilt in pain
 For I’ve lost the one whom has no soul, and
 Was all this give and take with us in vain?
 I loved your soul and heart, we joined by hand.
 The brewing storm that took a life, took two
 For deep within your heart was love,
 And deep within my heart was you
 I’ll see you soon, i promise; heart above.
 For without you I cannot survive
 For without you I will not strive


Details | Narrative | |

Christmas Rebels

Christmas Rebels
It was about a weak
After that night walk
The unknown dangers, 
Made known, turned me weak,
I was managing myself,
After my heart was pulled,
From where it sank,
I was yet in the oven,
Of my haven,
To dry up the coldness,
And the wetness, 
Of that fearful night loneliness,

Today is Christmas,
The whole mass,
Was joyous,
Every home, glorious,
Meat was plenteous, 
Rice and beans.
Was every homes means,
Children bouncing in,
New goat skin jackets,
Mother’s dressed in costly
Beads and all the way,
Father leads.
For Christmas had taking over,
Taking over the African Shrine,
It supplied a joyous sunshine.
Our pockets were full of cowries,
Like a goldmine,
Happiness was mine,
For the usual war seemed 
To be hidden, and our teethes where like, 
“Forever opened”.

Oh! Joyful, blissful, plentiful Christmas.
Providing joy each time it surface, 
But joy has a slender waist that breaks so soon.
Christmas night came, so we visited 
Our beds as night rang it’s bell,

(To be continued in the next, same Poem).


Details | Ballad | |

Antigone

I am the face of misery
My life, a dissonance of autumn and spring,
The years are written in the same
Lugubrious, nostalgic grey
How can it be the author to blame?
I cannot scream this all away…
Burn nor Bleed this all away…
To Death I am Ordained

Lacuna ever growing
With Velvet sheets of life flowing
Aeons apart of my "royalty"
Under the mask the cannot see...
Can you dispel this tragedy:
Antigone - Epiphany failing

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

No words of hope
No words of hate
Do I have Lenore to send to me:
The sordid child of Thebes
Caught In the longest nightmare
life - the slowest way to die

I know this is my life 
But I'm not under control
under the mask the will see
Just Another Human

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

Can you dispel my life; this tragedy?
Can you control the storm in my mind?
I'm asking you: can you rid me
Of The Curse of Antigone?


Details | List | |

Poetry Soup

Not knowing what you want can be pretty sad,
looking around and searching for the unreal is bad.
Than you stumble upon a treasure and find your self in that moment,
a moment that you have been waiting for and hoping to open it.


Details | Cinquain | |

Young Girls Pain

Love
Deceitful, wicked
Weeping, cringing, loathing
Things children shouldn’t feel
Hate
 
Intimacy
Repulsive, severe
Struggling, bleeding, collapsing
My pain continues unheard
Father
 
Hope
Abandoned, faulty
Hiding, listening, praying
Life is my suffering
Justice
 
Purpose
Forbidden, fruitless
Reeling, clutching, grinning
The agony has ended
Redemption

For more poetry goodness visit  www.checkmyflow.co.uk 


Details | Free verse | |

Draconian II

[The Puppeteer]
The storm I see you in
Caught in the race of Caïn
Held by the arms you cannot see--the conducter of Ennui 
-No stronger than the void you hold within-
It began with a hope, an obsession
Casted into, slavery of repugnant possessions 
Granted by, the Avaricious Lords, the ones we serve for
-They Told Us to pray, hope, away from despair, the despair caused by their immaculate Hands
Malice, envy, greed, was granted to me, The Feudal Dream, we want to be Them, just like him
-just how he solaces us, ambivalent hope, engendering knives to my throat 

[The Fall]
In this Valley of morning and weeping
Love lies bleeding, in desperate fear
With their talons, the hunt to rip out thy heart 
As each velvet petal falls apart
Her body chained in their bile and lies, covered with their red-spy
-sent just to check if our souls are in line, do not defy 
Her blood velvet and pure, drips away with innocence of the amber guardian 
The soil of plagues, beggars, and graves
Is know her home, the coven of solace
Though the seed has died--resurrection Is near passing through death's fear
One stronger than you--and thy funeral skies
She is alive--anew
But the vapors still remain
The Apocalypse is here, do we fear?
Just for the death of our sins
Elysia never Seemed so far away

[Our Damnation]
Solitary ruins, Fulfill their visions
We strayed far from the depths within 
We all lingered to his solace--lies
-you make the sign everyday, but lack toknow the name
We are just the toys, he pulls all of the strings
We are nothing in this burning world
of Decadence, and Failed Semblance

[Draconian] 
Draconian--Reach for the shadows within
Draconian--Break from the Fallen's son
Draconian--Their empirical lies, only die
Draconian--Reach the shadows within


Details | I do not know? | |

Living a Pipe Dream

A living tree has been planted to symbolize a life which has taken snuffed out, slained 
in his prime.Detectives haven't solved the crime.Future basketball star where are you now
heaven or purgatory.Your soul needs to rest,shooting hoops,doing lay-ups sweating,running
passing stop,go dribble,dribble,stop! screech, halt!. Running the back streets on the 
late night tip trying to survive on the wrong side of town, travel, stop, play offense 
is weaken only to live a hyped pipe dream,his defense is down and he knows they have 
come to gun him down so he decided to run to the other side of town.Do what it takes to 
become a superstar on to lose his soul. Everyone asked was he in the dope game no one 
really knows living lies that didn't get him far only to live a false pipe dream. Was
he playing the role of a double life to eventually be "X" out of the game no one really 
knows his soul still lingers in death park. Listen it is late, it is dark neighbors 
continue to mourn the ball player's lost.Neighbors can still hear the basketball hitting 
the back board in death park.


Details | Lyric | |

Come As You Are

At one point in my life i was an artist
I used to paint and draw
Covering a piece of paper
In beautiful colors
And my art told a story
The sort of story you couldn't talk about
I used to go to school every day
Showing up late 
Wasn't something I'd do
But i dropped out
Leaving my education behind
I played the bass guitar
In a band called 
The Nocturnal
My fingers ran against that bass
Pure magic
The sound of the gods
Setting out to destroy the world
Pure Punk straight from Seattle
At one point i was clean
Sober and pure like a new born baby
Falling further into 
What you now call 
"disapointment"
Screwing up my veins
with every shot of herion
Killing my brain cells
With every joint i smoked
Clogging up my nose 
With every pill you could have known
I used to write lyrics
About my life
My childhood
I used to write journals
The ones you read in the book 
that was published of me
I got up on that stage every night
As i was
Nothing fake
Nothing glamourous
Only a few scars
One shot of heroin
Come as you are
The words only speak for 
Themselves


Details | Rhyme | |

Goodnight

Is life worth a try?
Would I be living a lie?
If I smile, would it break?
If I laugh, would it be fake?
I see the tears from the sky and me
See how self doubting I can be
The feeling of damp grass
The moment that's bound to last
The ways I could wash away
All the people who have gone astray 
Is it me to blame?
When can my feelings be tame?
Why is this world so dark?
When can I actually make a mark?
The tears all fall down
Ive been given a permanent frown 
Standing out is not a choice
Cant risk screaming with my voice
The sky is now dark blue
How many insults were true?
I wish I could be pure
They all hate me, I'm sure 
All eyes watch me every move
So much that i want to prove
why do i still put up a fight?
Why shouldn't i just say goodnight?
i don't have anyone to miss
could death give me a dark ending kiss?
Is there a reason for me to be here?
I all i can feel is numbing fear
I just want to feel the sun shine
To feel happiness throughout my spine
But that is just a dream
That will float away with my desperate scream
Help is the word i always say
I ask for it everyday
And what do i get?
I pile full of regret
I think it's time
To end my faith, my suffering, my rhyme


Details | Ekphrasis (Ecphrasis) | |

To Whom It May Concern

To Whom it may concern,
the chances of my letter reaching you
are as slim as a message in a bottle.
My words throttle in waves of desolate emotion.
As common at it may be,
the moral to the message at sea is "Chance".
To Whom it may concern,
the chances of my letter reaching you
are as slim as a baby walking without a waddle.
My words throttle in falls of desolate emotion.
As common as it may be,
the moral of the waddling baby is "Chance".
To whom it may concern,
the chances of my letter reaching you
are as slim as a sponsor less model.
My words throttle in bankrupts of desolate emotion.
As common as it may be,
the moral to the model's degree is "Chance".
To Whom it may concern,
The chances of my letter reaching you are slim.
Because of my desolate emotions, I try any how.
As common as it may be,
It's by chance that one day you might hear me
Sincerely, To Whom it may concern


Details | Rhyme | |

Death by Beauty

A smile moves across her lips
She gazes at her crime
A scar across her flesh and soul
To haunt her for all time
She’ll waste away for all she cares
Never stops to use her brain
Doesn’t care about the ones who are close
All she cares about is pain

She wants to be what the others expect of her
Doesn’t care about the self-respect for her
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Can’t she see what all she has got
Already?

Never to go back again
She feels the world is at an end
She will never show her grief
Although she’ll cry in empty streetS

She’d sooner live like a desolate mole
Living in fear in an empty hole
Screaming silent wails alone
Content to live in her mental home

A final tear falls from her eye
It hits the ground, it’s followed by
A beautiful body, mutated by hate
A kind word could have stopped it, but it is too late
One two many bricks in the wall in her mind
Molding her demise because her heart was blind
This self conscious being could never have won
For she was destroyed by the beautiful ones

She wouldn’t fight back, wouldn’t respect herself
In the end, she managed only to wreck herself
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Little did she know, she had all she had sought
Already


Details | Ballad | |

Deadman Wonderland

Now that you're becoming Undone It's time to have some fun In Deadman Wonderland Khoon Tu Kao Khoon Tu Kao Khoon Tu Kao The setting Red Sun of Kali Shows it's time for your life to Pay We are the Kind to be feared -your friends We look like anyone you see Thuggee--Death's Devotees Face our treachery Bhowanee we must please She needs more--we have found our mark, our mark Won't you be the one to save humanity? Can't you see this is Deadman Wonderland Khoon Tu Kao Khoon Tu Kao Khoon Tu Kao Sacrifice! For The Black-Skinned Queen Sacrifice! For Our Mother Kali Sacrifice! It's Not Enough Sacrifice! No Mercy! This is Deadman Wonderland Deadman Wonderland This is Deadman Wonderland Deadman Wonderland


Details | Didactic | |

A Poem (Hebrews 13:5)

Anger consumed within me,

Rage passed continually by.

A mixture of blue and red,

Blinding the dim light inside me.

 

Once the light was like a flaming torch,

Such a torch that can be compared to the sun.

But even the sun rests, the flames can be vanquished

Only the night was witnessed until the morning dawned.

 

I was created to love you.

This was the only purpose,

But I chose to reject you.

How foolish of me to compose.

 

Given many chances to accept,

Welcome the love higher than my mother,

I was in an asylum locked by my choice.

"No more!" I uttered. 

 

A glowing door suddenly appeared,

"Who could it be?" I questioned.

It opened; a figure so bright glanced at the corner,

"My child, fear not," the figure mentioned.

 

I took his offering hand.

Richness of everlasting springs of water,

The right hand of infinite life.

We departed blissfully as He catered

 

"Do not sow any longer, for you are here with your Father,"    

I began to weep as a baby weeps for his mother.

"My child, for you were once lost but now have been found."

A final tear inching below, the Devil will no longer bother.


Details | Bio | |

Try Walking In My Shoes

You'll only collapse and fall and tear your knees open,
Shut your mouth, you cant even imagine what hell I've broken.
Blood leaking from my head everyday only makes me lose my mind,
You wouldn't even survive a minuet in my shoes if you were on my grind.

You say you know everything about me and how to live your own life, 
but face it tho, every night your left alone sitting with a knife.
I defeated that part in life where i have to do something for someone,
walking around with my "Ex Wife" as if it were my gun.

So please stop talking like you know what you got your self into,
cause if i were you i would open my eyes and pray that I'm not true. 
So here it is, if you want to walk a bit in these shoes of mine, go ahead, 
But I can promise you only one thing, in the end you'll end up Dead.


Details | Lyric | |

Along The Way

I say goodbye
To this chapter in my life
Im sure you will get the answers
When im gone
So when the day comes
The sun will not touch my face
Theres mistakes
The path is long
Look at my face
The stories it could tell 
The ones that wont erase
Tell the ones that cared enough 
That i finally left this place
So play the song
Its something to remind you
When im gone


Details | Lyric | |

Wasting Time

Way above the street lights
Watching yourself die
Waisting time

They left you in so much pain
You lost everything
For so many years
You pushed me out
Cant describe how i feel

This time im not going to watch myself cry
im not going to bury myself on the inside
You say you want the old me back
If you want me back
Your going to have to ask
Nice than that


Details | Lyric | |

Im Sorry

I hope you remember all of the bad things you have done so far
I hope you still have the chance to fix them 
Im sorry it took me forever to write this letter to you
Ive been meaning to save you from what your about to become
For some reason i cant get a grip on it
I dont know what i want to say
I dont know how to help you
Im about to tell you about some of the things you are about to do
Right now your 16
Right now you are sitting on your bed listening to music
Reading a book on your favorite band
Smoking that cigarette
That will soon get you into all the other things that causes more problems for you
Try to avoid the guy you are about to let into your life
Remember that your not allowed to talk to strangers
Remember your mom told you that when you were 7
Its about time you listen to her
You will meet a girl
And you will end up hurting her
Dont take her to that club 
Where your band is about to play
Your not good at singing
And your bass playing still needs some work
Dont embarass yourself
It lowers your self esteem
And you will try to committ suicide
Multiple times
But dont worry 
It doesnt work
So stop trying to 
Kill yourself
Remember the night when you ran away
And went to go live with your aunt
Yea...
Shes about to kick you out
Look under your bed
You will find 500 dollars
You put it there when you were young
You forgot 
Thats why im writing you
Remember it
Take it and use it wisely
Dont use it on the drugs 
Dont use it on the beer
Use it towards a better future
So then i dont have to write this letter again.

12-13-12


Details | Ballad | |

Cassandra

Revelation Said In Stone Appeared an Eon ago of Shame and Sin, Something we all know But not it's rise, For is has already became Virtue Flaming Skies from an Angel So Bright The World's Cure for Soul-Blight A Hell on Earth A Savior's Worth So many Dreams are cast then Forgotten So many lives are brought up then just Thrown back down Maybe she is The Cure Maybe she is The Plan All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim Release me and Burn away this land Hold me by The Hand Tell me the past is just pretend Give me The Cure If this is your destiny Then May it be mine I would die in time I'm Just another Obstacle In the way of your divine Wings Forget me Cassandra For Doom was already meant for me All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim Valkyrie of Heart Angel of Grace I surrender to You Savior by Destiny Dispel all Tragedy Especially me All Fear the Flame Failed Creation of Samael She Comes from the Deep She Comes from The Heavens' Vault To End the dawn of the Demon Purge this land of all Vice Kali Yuga will be nevermore The one of Sublime Cassandra, Bringer of Muspelheim


Details | Lyric | |

Goodbye

Remembering all the things we used to share
things we used to do together
when we were one
crumbling like buring leaves
glue couldnt put them back together
words he used to speak
the air that filled my lungs
Heart beating faster with every word
the feeling disapeared the night it all went wrong
nothing but guilt and tears filled my eyes
praying that the devil would make me yours
and youll be mine again
nothing more is left to say but the word we all fear
Goodbye


Details | Lyric | |

Here Is Gone

Ever thought of something so much
That when you wake up it just automatically
Crawls into your brain cells
Shoots them with laser beams
Until they explode 
And that’s the only thing you have left to think of
Because everything else is fried
Ever wish you could go back and change that night
Wish that you wouldn’t have left her side
That you would have just listened to your heart 
Instead of your gut
Instead of that little voice that echoes
In the back of your head
Ever wished that you wouldn’t be reading this poem
That everything could be like your dreams
Like a family who gets along
Like having a famous relative
Dreaming that you had a better life
More money to spend
More bass guitars to buy
Less drama
Then you find this special someone
Who you can really relate to
And you never want to let them go
But somehow they slip through your fingers
Then your life crumbles 
Falling down like the rain in a thunderstorm
Wishing you could change everything
But you just start over
And try to move on
And somehow end up at the beginning all over again



Details | Lyric | |

Stairway to Hell

So much rage
caught up in depression
now i have no one to turn too
i sit alone by my bed looking at the demon 
He stands next to the closet

I wake up every night at 2 am
just before dead time
He makes sounds
i ignore them

He opens the closet door
And slams it shut
scarring me 

One night he visits me in a dream
A dream where my family dies because i killed them
I wake up screaming
I would never hurt my family 

Sometimes its hard to ignore the other world
They make you crazy and depressed 
now you have to pay for the music that drug that demon to your home
All the metal music that killed you
The music that they said would save you

Ask your self are you alive now? 
now that the demon got you?

I think of how it could be different 
how if i listened to country my family would still be here
Demons are everywhere know that?
One is with you right now, watching you type your poems
Watching you read mine

What can they do you ask?
They can do much much more than what you expect
They crush your insides
Make your heart cold
They make you hurt

These demons are not to play with
A found out the hard way
now the pain wont stop
I cant make it go away

You will soon see what i have seen
Cling to god 
Pray everynight before you close your eyes
Pray out loud every morning
Be thankful you havent seen your demon yet

All of us have one
they are all over the world
They will drag you to hell with them!


Details | Lyric | |

heart shaped box

Sitting cross legged on the floor
He pulls out the heart shaped box from underneath his bed
Opening the top and laying it on the floor
He looks inside the heart shaped box
Finding old pictures
Broken memories
And regrets of his own
He looks through the pictures
Gasping when he finds what he's been looking for
An old picture of him as a child
Glaring at the picture 
He sees an old man in the background
Bringing back horrible memories
Of the old man beating him
The old man wasn't old
But acted old
he quickly shuts the box and puts it underneath his bed
His mother walks up the stairs
"ready ?" she asks
He gets up on his two feet and walks downstairs with her
They gather there things
And walk out to the vehicle
She slams the door and starts the car
The boy sits in the seat and watches the view
As there driving by
The reached the destination
They both get out of the car
she holds a tissue in her right hand
The young boy walks up the stairs 
He sees a whole bunch of people
Standing around a coffin
The old man's funeral
The boy walks up to the casket
Stares at the old man
The boy touches the old man's hand and smiles


Details | I do not know? | |

For Men Everywhere One Billion Rising

1 Billion Rising.

For Men Everywhere.

Stop! Listen! Think! Act!

Stop!

Stop the abuse!

Of grand-daughters,
colleagues,
daughters,
girlfriends,
partners,
mothers,
sisters,
nieces,
wives,

all women.

Listen!

Listen to the voices!

Of grand-daughters,
colleagues,
daughters,
girlfriends,
partners,
mothers,
sisters,
nieces,
wives,

all women.

Think!

Think of how you treat,

grand-daughters,
colleagues,
daughters,
girlfriends,
partners,
mothers,
sisters,
nieces,
wives,

all women.

Act!

Act now to change yourself!

Stop! Listen! Think! Act!

The violence,
the abuse,
the rape,

stops when you stop,

the violence,
the abuse,
the rape.

Stop! Listen! Think! Act!

The violence,
the abuse,
the rape,

is perpetrated by,

grand-fathers,
colleagues,
boyfriends,
husbands,
nephews,
brothers,
partners,
fathers,
uncles,

men,

all men.

Stop! Listen! Think! Act!

The violence,
the abuse,
the rape,

stops when us men stop,

The violence,
the abuse,
the rape,

today, now.

Stop! Listen! Think! Act!


Details | Rhyme | |

An Explanation for the Decimation

We may have had none, one, two, or more
Intricate mistakes we quell to adore 
Unconsciously transcending perfidy from the heart
Counterfeit penitent that epitomizes the start
Remiss to the love that ensure no art
Mad that it happened, we wish it never did
We tried to intact the emotions that we hid
Until we hackneyed three words for bid
“I love you” manifest the aspersion for real
When the heart cajoled its life to kill


Details | Ballad | |

Starcrossed Tragedy

A Silent Night's Hunt for a Tigress so blunt, Left the Fiend dancing with my Thisbe's Cloack But where was She? Her Drenching blood is all I can see The Night of Sanguine, The Night of Rapture, Tonight was meant to be All Behold This Tragedy ran by Dark Energy, My Lost Lover's Plea A seed of what is to come, In this starcrossed Tragedy, For I can not live without you, My Pyramus, All I need, My reason to Breathe One sight of me bleeding away from reality, started this tragedy and with me It shall Grow The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy A Star traveling across the moonless Night Sky, In the mid-summer of Verona, Fell from her glorious light, I have lost my guide, My need for Life Every balcony I'll climb for you, Just to Caress you once more But now it is too Late, My Juilet Let the Poison Fill me My Body dyed In silence, Dipped in Paralysis, Forging the Will of God, Feigning the Clutches of Death, My Romeo I prithee to you, See past The Illusion, Caught in the Webs of Love's delusion A Dagger reached my heart once To see you martyr for our love A Dagger reached my heart twice The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy Once the Morning Retired from her weeping The sun shined into her eyes, then his Lifeless, their dream will live on Every Petal will be Avenged The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy


Details | Than-Bauk | |

My Inner BOSS

Take my hand and walk with me, 
ill show you side of a world that you never seen. 
Ill show you where its ends meat and where gangsters meet,
this is where all the goons come out to play and steal the street. 

No one goes into my hood,
we done really care for you angry mood.
Music will blare everywhere around out street,
it's always dark and you cant see anything but peoples feet.

Your eyes open up so wide and a smile appears on your face,
you tell me you love this part of my village, and your heart stands no chance.
You ask me if you can stay with me and i answer, "ill need some more protection for you,
and make it seem like i had nothing to do.

It is my hood, don't get me wrong, i protect what i love with all my heart,
even if it means to kill one of my own demons for you, and put you as the start.
You walk me out to the streets where every one is dancing to the blaring music, to give me another chance,
we walk out onto the floor and begin to move your body in a way i never seen before, than you lean to me and ask, "would you like to dance"?



Dedicated to: Esther Baleva! 
PS: My one and only Angel. I Love Her!


Details | Lyric | |

UNFOLD

The pain of change as it unfolds
Is oft a tale that stays untold
What is seen is a whole creature
not deep holes in the feature
nor concrete soles that makes his feet hurt

It all begins with a soft kiss
He is walking with a false bliss
Only following in paw prints
But the nature of mom's lips
Is to rob him of all innocence

Trapped in warm spindles of fear
A wrapped life form kindles in here
Four years bound to shingles of moss
Time to leave this life of sloths
Break free like that of a moth
and Rise again like Christ on the cross


Details | Free verse | |

The Fear

The Aphotic rays reach higher
And shame, shade reigns over all
Lacuna, Apathy is all I feel as I fall into the ashed grave
I'm living, the slowest way to die
Elysia, rapture where are you now

What will I do when the flame is extinguished 
What will I do when I drown in ash
What will I do when they sing my name in funeral dirges 
How can this be all, one short organic vitality
Scares to die, but afraid of a new day

Scared to die, but so afraid of a new day
Will I Ressructe to Paradise, burn in Hell, or lay in Sheol
Is this a there is, one feather, to the dirge
My life so long - my suffering grows
Scared to die, but so afraid of a new day

In all of the ashes, a flame begins
Once again, here I am
Living, the slowest way to die


Details | Ballad | |

CHILD UNBORN

On a cold and bleak November day in a lonely
Deserted place a child unborn in its sanctuary
Lies asleep like a bud soon to bloom
A sacred gift, priceless, unique 
For a world that is rapidly dying

On a cold and bleak November day 
A mother's scent will it ever know
No special bond with another soul
No joyful offering of 'thanks', nor smiles, 
Nor welcome kisses that warm the heart


On a cold and bleak November day, the sky 
Draped in blankets of gray, hung low 
Over the horizon marked by fresh-fallen snow
An innocent life is taken in some unholy place
As consciences lay bound and silenced

On a cold and bleak November day, 
Freewill, once more misused, hovered 
In the shadows abused and clothed in shame 
Bore witness to one of many horrors   
The deliberate murder of the Innocents

On a cold and bleak November day a  hush  falls over Heaven
The Son of God pleads mercy as He alone dares to speak
God looks upon His only Son, once again, His anger subsides 
A new day is ordained-another chance to choose
A priceless gift to save the world some cold bleak day
 


Details | Free verse | |

The Rebellious Teen

The rebellious Teen loved all his friends. 
The only ones he listened to… were them.
They wanted him to drink and smoke every night. 
They said experimenting with drugs was definitely all right.

The rebellious teen’s mom was beside herself… 
This was her child and this could finish his life.
But he continued to listen to the Devil himself.
What could she do in the end to save his life?

The devilish friends held him closely in the palm of his hand…
In the end she decided she had to move far away from them.
Somewhere… where only new friends he could find.
Those who loved life, sports, and learning: to draw him back in.

Then every so often she let him, for a visit, to go back…
Each time he went, fewer were left to contact, yes, some were even dead.
Some had over dosed… Some didn’t care who he was any more.
What he found was rot and that they lacked the drive to live.

The rebellious teen cried for what he saw they had become…
He had changed and now could see, what was happening to them…
These were no longer the friends that he remembered from before.
He tried to save them with words and his love… but they didn’t care.

He didn’t want to go back to that sadness, to live ever again… 
Now he looked to the future and that was a fact.
The moral I tell you, all of my friends…if he won’t listen to you… 
Then find him new friends.

For if he is your life and if you want him to live…
Find others to help steer him or else you can’t win…
Let his support group be new peers who enjoy life to the brim.
Yes, those who will help lead him to walk in the light again.

From a true experience…


Details | Lyric | |

Life as an Addict





                                        

                                     Life as an Addict


                         Life as an addict, life as an addict
                       Life as an addict is like running into
                            A reinforce cinderblock wall
                                    Losses after losses 
                                           Virtually
                     Ending in a jail cell or luxurious casket
                      Day after day the addiction keeps at it
                                           Eventually 
                                Opening doors to the soul
                          Stepping inside leading you down
                               A wicked and dark passage
                                           Ultimately
                                     Leaving you naked
                                  Clinching your wounds
                                      Shattering dreams
                                      Low self – esteem
                                    Thoughts in captivity
                                          Life of misery
                         Life as an addict limited imagination
                                 Waste of God’s creation
                                          But forgiven
                                      Evil, dark passage 
                                  Reinforce walls, jail cell
                                Lost soul, luxurious casket 
                            Life as an addict, life as an addict
                                        Life as an addict.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

No Parachutes,safety nets,souls,or hope

Love is whispered and not forgotten
If this be so
I deaf to soft lipped invitations seek no thought of hope
I of no past collection hold thought
To forget is gruesome and beautiful

My eyes, swift allies in my war of world tell no lies

Silent in the 4 walled chalkboard blue
Shakespearean mad men twist their tongues with words of bland hue

I believe the concept of Ugliness is more profound than that of beauty
Dreams of my bladed face fill up behind my eyes...scratching my mind

Nothing goes SURPRISE! anymore
To love and lose is not the exciting protagonist to never having lost love

the optimists run in circles
pretenders of despair hunt themselves

Every street is Desolation row and my window is covered with blood

Nothing comforts anything
No advice

....just surprises


Details | Lyric | |

Meet Me At The Gates

Standing across from damien
whom had been his lover for yea
He takes his heart out of his chest
And places it in Damiens hands
Kurt says "this heart belongs to you"
He askes Damien "do you want it?"
Damien places Kurts heart in his hands
"i dont"
Kurt throws it to the ground and stomps on it
Looking down at his crumpled heart a tear 
Falls from his cheek
He starts walking away
He falls to his knees
Like suffocating
Damien runs over to him
But is blocked by a black mist
Damien stands there whispering
"Kurt come back"
Kurt stands up and places his heart
Into Damiens pocket
As Kurt turns and walks away
The sky opens up
And kurt rises to the clouds
A few years later Damien joins him up at the gates


Details | Bio | |

Take The Next Step

Im gone, im leaving now, 
Taking one last breath I remember my vow.
You holding my hand so gently,
Your tears falling, and kissing my lips so greatly. 

I look into your eyes while my life flashes before my eyes,
My hand on my heart feeling the way it dies.
I manage to squeeze one last request out of my depth, 
I take you hand and tell you to take the next step.


Details | Free verse | |

Death

Death had come.
Death had killed.
Death had left.
Death had taken my friend.

The only one I trust.
Leaving me here alone, 
Depressed.

Death had come.
Death had killed.
Death had left.
Death had taken my family.
 
The fire burned our home.
Turning them into dust.
Burning loneliness into my heart.
Quieted.

Death had come.
Death had killed.
Death had left.
Death had taken my life.


Details | Lyric | |

Alive

Have you ever noticed how a paint brush dries out
After two minutes of just sitting there?
Kind of like how you have been drawing for 10 
years and all of a sudden you forget how to
You lost all your techniques
And you move on and find something better
like the lyrics you used to write in school
Thinking one day you'll sing them to the world
And when you finally get a band together
Someone got grounded and everything falls apart
like that time when you did drugs
Thinking it would solve your problems
But it just made them worse
Like a friend
Telling you how to live your life
And tell you what you should and should not do
Its like the first time you felt alive
Holding her hand and being close to her
Then she goes away
And you are forced start all over again
without her


Details | Ballad | |

Death of an Innocent Heart

Death of an Innocent Heart


That day I fell,today I lie six feet under.I thought you was the one when we first met you made me laugh you held me when I cried and now We have grown to far apart to even truly remember what we use to be.Then by sad chance by crushing feet by this deadly curse you left me and that day I felt my heart die.I wonder what I would do next should i had moved on would the pain hurt me more I don't think i can handle it,should i end my life here will i have pain no more.But what lie beyond death how do I not know I will leave this pain.That day i jump off the bridge into the lake that day I let myself be swept away I let myself drown in sorrow and pain.When I am reborn i wish to be free like the bird in the sky like the ocean and streams, never to face what it mean to be a human.Today I die for the lost of my love for you,It is what most call the death of innocent love.


Details | Couplet | |

Jada Mortensen

And so she was the girl from Bair.
With ocean eyes and golden hair.
Of heavy heart and light despise
Of cupid's dart and winter's cries.
There came a day when things did end.
Around the corner of the bend
There came a truck and in dispair
The loudest word was spoken there.
And so she left to who knows where.
Whilst many cried because they cared.
She roams around in circles too,
And whispering winds and skies of blue.
We raise our glass towards the sky
And smile a memory although she died.
No tears tonight, not ever one.
For there she rests inside the sun.
She is okay we know for sure.
In better days to now endure.
And so she was the girl from Bair
With clemency; a heart so fair.
And as we lay in bed and sigh,
I'd like to say to you Goodbye.

Rest In Peace Best Friend
11-21-1996 ~ 06-21-2011


Details | Haiku | |

Haiku Cigarettes

Cigarettes are gross. They can really kill you too Dead. Gone. Forever


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Dad

Dear Dad 				
Why don’t you love me? 
The small brown eyed girl asked her father as he beat her at night,
 then with a smile in the morning he’d scoop her up in his arms to play.
Why don’t you love me? 
The bigger brown eyed girl asked her father as he walked out and
never came back.
Why don’t you love me? 
The young brown eyed girl asked her boyfriend of two years,
As he walked out the same door her father did eight years before.
Never to return.
Why didn’t you love me?
The older brown eyed girl asked her father at his funeral.
As she leaned over the edge of his casket and kissed him gently on the forehead,
Tears running down her cheeks.
Why couldn’t you love me? 
The oldest brown eyed girl asked as she lays Jasmine’s and roses
On her father’s grave.
Only a row down from her old boyfriend’s,
With love that never dies.
And her question is answered in the wind, 
As the answer is whispered in her heart.
How could you love me?
If you couldn’t love yourself?


Details | Diminished Hexaverse | |

Dropped In To Say Hello

Its sad to see someone you know and love in a hospital bed,
Its sad to see them hanging on to there life by a thread.
You begin to wonder, someday that's going to be me laying here,
But than you noticed that you loved through so much you'll go away without fear.

Seeing an old man on his death bed is a sore sight,
Praying and wishing he comes out alive and ready to fight.
You begin counting down your own days to live,
Thinking about if there is anything else you would like to give.

I been dying for a while now and still in counting of my short days,
I know I can drop at any moment, but it only seems like I lived in a hais. 
Who's going to remember me when im gone,
People will being saying look at what he has done,

A monster in discise I will leave this retched planet,
My body barried seven feet deep not six like everyone has done it.
To be further away from everyone they will burry me this deep,
Everyone will be free from this monsterish evil creep.


Details | Lyric | |

December

Arguing with one another
Texting back and forth
Owen drives in the blizzard
Kurt is at home

Kurt sends Owen another message
"why did you tell them about me doing drugs?"
"that wasnt your place, i dont care if there your parents too"
"shouldnt i be the one to tell them?"

Owen tries to reply to the message Kurt has sent him
He loses control of the wheel
driving into a field 
Kurt recieves a message from Owen
"Im sorry I..."
The message was never finished
The car slamming into a tree
The tree branch breaks through the window
Thrashing into Owens stomach
As Owens head slams back and forth
The car is left smoking

Kurt knows something is wrong
but leaves things be

50 Minutes Later...."

Kurt and Owen's parent recieve a call from the police
"Is this the parent of Owen Everdeen?" the police ask
the mother answers "yes is something wrong? is it Owen, what did he do now?"
"Mam', Your son was in a accident, they are life flighting him to the hospital"
She drops the phone, and grabs her purse and yells at Kurt to come on.

She drives fast to get to the hospital to see her son
Owen was life flighted to the hospital
The police had to use the jaws of life to get him out of his car

They finally make it to the hospital
The Dr. asking "Are you the mother of Owen?"
She cries "yes, where is my son?"
Kurt stands upset at himself for fighting with Owen minutes before
Remembering Owens last text to him. "im sorry I.."

The Dr. explains to the mother 
"Owen didnt make it"
She sits in sadness
Numbness
She cannot breathe

Kurt runs after the Dr.
"this cant be, he has to be ok" as he starts to cry.
Just the night before him and his brother
Were playing guitar hero together
Remembering the last moment
The arguing
The reqruet Kurt is now feeling

"Owen Ryan Everdeen: Jan. 1st, 1990- December 8th, 2011"
To a good brother and a great friend, im sorry about all those times i have let you down
Im sorry for yelling at you that night, and causing your crash, the guilt i feel wont leave
I am sorry that you went through that, and left this world that way, forgive me for what i 
have caused. I love you.


Details | Lyric | |

For the Dying Orphan

I let you die for my name As you reached for my hands Out of waters of drowning What a hypocrite this writer is The Hatred of Solitude Letting an orphan dream Then destroy him with knowledge Of what you have done He opened up to you In new ways But in nostalgic guises The springwinds whisper blithe yore But the winterwinds, much stronger Caress you with the dreams of your funeral sky “It was you… it was your fault… Letting the one who was so open to you Be the laugh… the piece in the game…”


Details | Lyric | |

Unsuspecting Victim

Four teenagers 
Paige
Matt
Kevin
Kat

Backgrounds-
Paige- psychic, can see and talk to the dead, has demons who come to her for help
Matt- Has demons attachted to him, dating paige
Kevin- A Nerd from school, intersted in pot
Kat- Training psychic, paiges best friend, dating kevin

Prom Night- 2011

Sitting in the car positioning themselves
into a compfy spot
Matt sits in the driving seat
Paige in the passenger seat
Kat and Kevin in the back seat
Kat laying on Kevins shoulder
All of them latch there seat belts
Driving unto the road to go to after prom
Paige sees someone
Someone no oe else can see but her
Sitting right beside her is her (demon but almost human ghost) friend
He whispers "i can try to keep you save from everything, but i cant make a promise)
She looks down at Matts foot
Holding unto the break peddal is one of Matts demons
The demon breaks the pedal and has one hand into the engine of the car
A car coming up behind them
Trying to pass them
Matt decides to make it difficult for them to pass
As he does he tries to hit the breaks
And they didnt work
They drive into the ditch 
Trying not to hit the other car infront of them
Flipping a few times as they land with all the tires on the ground and the 
Top of the car towards the sky
Paige lays on the windsheild her head cut by the glass
She looks  at her self
She sees her body laying there looking up at Matt as he smirks to her
His eyes turn black and he smirks again
Paiges ghost friend opens the door and pushes her out
Far from the car
She now lays close to the road
She watches the car as it rolls off the hill
Flipping it again, also looking down at her lifeless body
She sees Matts demon again

The Night After

Paige was rushed to the hospital
Matt, Kevin and Kat left with only bruises and a few cuts
Paiges brain was internally bleeding
She stands in the hospital 
Outside of her body
Standing looking at her ghost friend
He ssays to her "as much as i want you to be here with me, your family needs you in your other life"
She wakes up a few hours later, in her body, and getting better


Details | Free verse | |

The Land of Sophia

Escape the tort of our avarice world Defy the ones who shift the blame Deter the decadence forgetting shame Freedom is on the top of the bare eyes Beyond the consciousness of The Human Kind Search harder and then you'll find The Land of Sophia Dwelling past are needs Swirling around our bare minds Our wants polluting out sight the Land of Sophia is lost at night Are the Lies held worth it in time Only embracing The Veil of Logic The Truth is cast into shade where all vices are soon to be made For all of our dreams and dramaticies The Destruction Star poisons seas Far from This Galaxy among the stars I can see myself, And The One I've became Escape the tort of our avarice world Defy the ones who shift the blame Deter the decadence forgetting shame Freedom is on the top of the bare eyes Beyond the consciousness of The Human Kind Search harder and then you'll find The Land of Sophia Dwelling past are needs Swirling around our bare minds Our wants polluting out sight the Land of Sophia is lost at night Caught in our lust, of forgetting trust I wonder can we break free of bound forever in the clutches of Lilith's Love Eden's Heart Who's desperate For Love Who's desperate For Light yet wallows in Blight and chooses to wait--forevermore The wait in Summer--An Eternity Lilith's Love Eden's Heart Escape the tort of our avarice world Defy the ones who shift the blame Deter the decadence forgetting shame Freedom is on the top of the bare eyes Beyond the consciousness of The Human Kind Search harder and then you'll find The Land of Sophia Dwelling past are needs Swirling around our bare minds Our wants polluting out sight the Land of Sophia is lost at night We don't chose what's right I can't believe we are able to see this far Crawling in Shadows Never will breath find it's light Escape the tort of our avarice world Defy the ones who shift the blame Deter the decadence forgetting shame Freedom is on the top of the bare eyes Beyond the consciousness of The Human Kind Search harder and then you'll find The Land of Sophia Dwelling past are needs Swirling around our bare minds Our wants polluting out sight the Land of Sophia is lost at night
**Mark Jansen, Guitarist, Male Vocals, and main songwriter of Epica**


Details | Lyric | |

Bruise

bruise bruise bruise 
cut 
bruise bruise bruise 
cigarette burn 
bruise bruise bruise 
cut
bruise bruise bruise
broken heart 
bruise bruise bruise 
distracted mind.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Particles Of Light

Alone is when reality doesn't exist anymore

Alone is when the one person breathes for rebellion

The speed of madness soaring through the human body at million miles per hour

Taking a different road than the one intended

Taking the high sprialing road

No longer a person you know, but a stranger

Instead of reality

Fireworks covered the sky

Everything was perfect, but only for awhile

Then the crash of blackness encircles like a haunting cloak of death

When the last breaths of life come too close

The only thing left to do is replay memories of happier times

Hoping not to die in this distorted state

Then suddenly reality caves in

And all thats left is to watch those particles of lights come back





Details | Ballad | |

Deirdre

 
Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? I can sence her embrace that feels like Tragedy A heart to have, slipped beneath the waves The dark pulse now beckons us closer How many days will this passion bleed away? We will be the ones left to blame Beware we’ve become their prey They say you’re addicted to your pain A lifeless cold barren soul left to die in the rain A whisper too close to the edge A call from the dark Brings out a saving spark An Exodus from her Pain Her Life Spent breathing in Shame A Shadow Call breaks the Silence Am I the one to blame? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? “My Decadence was just for you Though you’d never care what I’ve been through Enter the world were empathy is clandestine A world created by you, just for me What’s Lying in my heart is why You want to through the stone” I call your name towards nightfall’s reign But they take you so far away A dark angel so divine Cursed by Eden’s heart I will avenge every tear An Exodus from her Pain Her Life Spent breathing in Shame A Shadow Call breaks the Silence Am I the one to blame? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don't you know Deirdre never said wrong? Don't you know Deirdre's gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone? Don’t you know Deirdre’s gone?


Details | Lyric | |

Blind

So many songs describe how i feel
But you wouldnt have the time to listen to them
To actually figure out what they meant
Or how much they related to me
If i died today i can say the only
Thing you would miss
Is me trying to make you smile
Things have been depressing me for years
All the anger i hold is real
Falling further into soemthing
You wouldnt want me to be
I know if i told you 
You would be confused
You wouldnt know what you did
To make me do what im about to do
I let myself cry to long
That i buried myself alive on the inside
I wish i could shut you out
And let you go away for a long time
I guess its better that i trapped myself in my own way
At one point the chain broke away
And i had my own time
I took an early flight and i made it home
I realized how unfair you were being
Everyone always got more than i did
Got your attention
More than i did
If i played my bass 
Would you hear the anger behind it?
If i let you read my poems
Would you understand why im writing it?
If i told you i thought about doing something bad
Would you try to make everything i hate about you better?
I dont think you understand 
Maybe i should explain more
Or would i bore you?
Probally...
So you know
I wanted a father
But instead i had a dad
To me
It hurt
It still does
And i watched myself die
From hurting so much
Cutting my heart out
On the inside
Im different 
In so many ways
My friends give me more complaments
Then my mother has my whole life
"thats good" isnt what i want from you
I would rather have you really 
Grasping the meaning behind why
I am writing poems
The meaning behind why i draw
Or play the bass
Even if i died i wouldnt think
You would get it
If i did what im going to do
I would have you right where i want you
If you want me back
Your going to have to ask
Nicer than that
Things in my life are different than yours
I see things differently
I love music
And i want you to see that
I talk to you through my music
I talk to you through my poems
I talk to you through my bass guitar
You cant trust me?
I lied to you?
Dont you remember when 
You told me you would give me up
for adoption when i was born?
That hurt more than anything
Yes you kept me
BUt you thought about giving me up
Just like you gave up on me ten years later
This will be the last of me
And i hope you understand now
That you are my problem
That you are the one
I couldnt trust
That you were the one who lied
What else could i hide
When i have been an open 
Book his whole time
and you couldnt see it?


Details | Lyric | |

Bicycle Beds

Written February 26, 2013


Its all this new slang
Got them banging their heads
Against their bicycle beds
And the foolhardy pledge 
To ride tricycles instead

We are the kings and queens
Of the wonderful yard
Of the street corner dancers
And panhandling bards

A generation will rise
So duck and cover your eyes
We're building up through the night
No need to put up a fight

Godspeed to those approaching death
They won't get to see
What we've got coming next
You'll faint from holding your breath

This cold case is closed
No need to stay in repose
To dwell on precious regrets
That are laced with vellocet


Details | Lyric | |

Grave Yard

Your eyes shut tight
Hearing a sound
Your heartbeat races
You can feel the little pieces 
Bleeding through
The hairs on your arms
Stand up
Closing your eye lids shut
Keeping them from opening
Reaching your hand over
To turn on the light
Once you do
You open your eyes
And nothing is there
Your heat beat dies down
And your back to feeling alone

Walking to the graveyard 
Going there as you
And leaving there as someone else
You can feel them all around you
Grasping unto you
And never letting go
Places parellel
You know its something paranormal

You decide not to stay
You feel yourself start to fade away
pretty soon everything
will be back where it belongs

The ghost grabbed unto your depression
And it slowly killed you
From the inside out
Now you are in the graveyard


Details | Free verse | |

Rakes and Flames

As the dawn expells its authoritive cast; they awake, but are abandoned. They
turn--but their friend the sun ignores  and they understand.   They commune
their relationship and part with their memories;   and sigh.

They say their good-byes in a tone of fullfilment, but aface their anxieties
toward the skies for hope; but are denied. A clouded sky brings a chill in the 
air and a rustling of rakes and flames. 

Old as hell, written in HS for publication, circa 1971 by me. When I was young in the 60's in Ohio, we burned leaves in our backyard; sometimes our household trash too. You had to be me to be there GV. Count me in as last place. Take care.  


Details | Quatrain | |

The Robbery

Rob me of my purity,
But once again it's all my fault;
Fell into the trap of false promises
Because I pressed play instead of pause.


Details | Lyric | |

In Another Light

The best thing you can do about a suicide is understanding it.

The boy opens the door and walks by his mom
his mom says "how was school"
He doesnt respond 
he walks silently to his room
His mom turns away in sadness
"its dinner time Kurt" she yells up the stairs.
He walks slowly down the steps
Hiding something in his hand as he puts it in his pocket
His mother is setting the table
Putting meat on his plate 
He sits down unto the seat
not touching his food
"is there something wrong with it?" his mom asks
He doesnt look at her
"talk to me. why have you been ignoring me" she repeats.
He gets up off the chair and walks outside
Walking into the woods as his mom runs out
"get back here where are you going"

Every living thing dies alone." he writes in white on a tree in there back yard
He throws the rope over the toughest branch
He steps up unto a little chair
Tying the rope around his neck
The chair falls

His mom worries in panic
She cant find him anywhere
She waits up all night

The Next Morning"

She walks out to the garden
Looking up at a tree
She sees the fallen chair from behind a tall bush
She runs
Picking up the chair
Seeing the thing she never thought would have happened
She falls to her knees
A tear falls from her cheek
Not understanding 
Reading the words on the tree
Every living thing dies alone"
She wonders
Thinking
Crying

She untangles him from the tree and holds him
Talks gentle to him
Something she hasnt done in a while
Now grasping the meaning behind what he has done

The best thing you can do about a suicide is understanding the meaning behind it.


Details | Lyric | |

Junkie

you know its wrong 
but you do it to overpower the pain
not strong enough to stay away from it
you would die without it
in its presence your heart knows no shame
even if you try to win the fight
your heart will overrule your mind
Theres nothing you can do
its chained to you
you cant get free
look what this drug did to you


Details | Free verse | |

A Blue Boy's Death Wish

A fragile mind breaks 
Wake upon the rock laden shores
A muffled heart begs to echo
Whispers lost among a velvet chamber

Dusk comes premature time and again
Dropping the curtain on an optimistic sunrise
If you never witness dawn
There is no tomorrow

Always the dreamer aches
Never awake to make real what he desires
The restless corpse walks blind
Dead ends seem fitting for one of the kind

Lost in the labyrinth of strangling vines
Love is the motive and the weapon
Taking root in throats dry from weeping
Sprouts of amnesia in place of smiles
A garden called heartbreak holds onlookers captive
The comfort takes hold, sets in the bones weary of searching
A plea for rest lands on deaf ears

The hollow boy tires of himself
The last request he will ever make
"End me"
Lost and tired
He wishes to be weak no more


Details | Rhyme | |

I dont want to think about that

So what if i smoke, who does it hurt?
Why do you care what plant i choose to grow from the dirt?
I just want to laugh again,
I i just want to smile again,
Smile for something other then a family photo.
This is my crutch, this is how i cope..
This is how i tell my self that there is still hope, It could be my only hope.
My obi-wan-kanobi, the only one who knows me.
I don't know if your my savior but do believe your close,
you keep me laughing, you keep me off a rope.
mother why can't you see! 
This is so much more then dope!
It leaves a sour taste now because I know you don't approve,
there is so much worse things that i could use and abuse,
Don't you remember my friend Dillon? Don't you remember the news?
I knew he was getting into bad Sh*t but i just ignored the clues..
but f*ck, i don't want to think about that....
F*CK! I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THAT!
Maybe if i smoke this it will somehow bring him back..


Details | I do not know? | |

For Anene Booysen 1996 - 2013

Hamba Kahle Anene Booysen! (1996 – 2013)


Dead at 17, brutally raped and left to die,
in the dirt,

 

at a construction site in Bredasdorp.

 

‘horrific’, ‘repulsed’,
‘brutally raped’, ‘shocked’,

 

do these words mean anything,
to anyone,

anymore.

 

Not to Anene Booysen,

 

murdered at 17, brutally raped and left to die,

in the dirt,

 

at a construction site in Bredasdorp.

 

Anene was raped,
savagely mutilated,

 

Her 17 year old body tossed aside,

 

by the hands of men.

 

Men, always men,

 

cowardly, beastly, perverted, twisted men.

 

‘Beastly’, ‘perverted’, ‘twisted’,

 

do these words mean anything,
to anyone,

anymore.

 

Not to Anene Booysen,

 

who now lies cold and dead.

 

How many Anene Booysens will it take,

 

for us,
society,
families,
people,

 

human-beings,

 

and,

 

men, especially men,

 

to excise the ghastly menace,

 

of the heinous capacity that resides,

 

within men,

 

always men,

 

to brutalise, rape, mutilate, and murder.

 

‘Brutalise’, ‘murder’, ‘rape’,

 

do these words mean anything,
to anyone,

anymore.

 

Not to Anene Booysen,

 

murdered at 17, brutally raped and left,

 

to die,

 

in the dirt,

 

at a construction site,

 

in Bredasdorp.

 

 

Anene Booysen
(1996 – 2013)

 

* – Hamba Kahle – “Farewell, Travel Well” in Zulu

 

** – Bredasdorp is a small town near Cape Town, South Africa


Details | Narrative | |

The Known Soldier

Last night awakened with thoughts of him
How long has it has been, only
Yesterday … 

First one I ever saw laid out
I sixteen, he nineteen, Viet Nam 
Airborne …

Purple complexion seeping through under glass 
I gaze on doll-like hair
Broomcorn …

His uniform perfect, tie straight
Blouse olive, at attention
Airborne … 

No one else at the funeral home
Me and a girl friend too early for death
Careworn …

Dead before he hit the ground
Cut down by ground-fire first jump no longer
airborne ...

So many years now, forty-two,
awakened with thoughts of him,
Wind-borne …

Still see his body rigid attention
rumor wire for arm, died before his time
Soilborne …

Didn’t know him well, would he
still be here if not
Airborne …

Would we have smoked and talked about 
women if he would be
reborn …

And what of Thua Thien, what now 
monument, blood of airborne boys?
Golf course …


Details | Lyric | |

Beside you in time

Standing facing you
As you face me
The words fall out of your mouth
I see them float to my ears
I read them as they fly by me
Leaving me 
Just like you are
You turn to me
And you shot me
Telling me to dig the bullet
Out of my heart
I reach inside my heart
As it crumbles apart
Into a million pieces
As i try to pick up all the pieces
I realize some are missing
And were neverto be found
I see myself
Holding the bullet
As im standing next to you
Holding up a fake smile
Things havent changed
Because
We were meant to be
Even tho you left me
I will be standing 
Beside you in time


Details | Narrative | |

''Runaway Wanted''

I see my breathe.
Night has fell upon a frost.
Gods' chill lye now on my shoulders.
Alone yet not.
Silence now before the icey rain.
Surrender as my nervous teeth chatter.
For the warmth of a home is all that is desired.
My empty haven.
But,I am filled with a heart that is full.
Want nor wait.
Arms now cover me like a blanket.
Gust of wind has carried your unwaivered heart.
Candles lit a way to find what is left.
Merely an image of what once was.
Break down into a sob.
Remains frozen solid as climate has taken its' vengence.
I suffer no more,weak body.
Now only in spirit.
Shall I rest.


Details | Rhyme | |

Me

So you want to know me? The life you cannot see? The things in misery? All about me? I held the hand of a dying man, I bow before the great god Pan! You still want to know and take my hand? My life is no wonderland. I’m always judged for what I say, I’m always judged for being gay. You send me to go and lay, In piles of needles, to find false hay. You tie me up, burn me down, With smiles and laughter of evil clowns, You cover me in chains to drown, In oceans deep, down, down, down. I helped a cancer patient live! I taught the greedy how to give! Though I don’t even get to live, I only just survive. I am a witch, a wiccan through, I love to lay in cold, wet dew I sing and dance the witches rune I believe in the bright full moon! All that is, and ever was, Of me is gone now like a dove, I still can’t believe in one true love, For all of that is gone. I live in darkness, forevermore, For life has nothing deep in store, For light is just believed folklore, Washed up on the darkened shore. I don’t exist, for I will fade, And you will ask “who’s Andrew Jade?” You will forget the things I’ve made You won’t know where I’m laid. For deep in my shallow grave, I remember all I did save, For everything that I gave. To die, a funeral, no one there, Lying there full of despair. For now you might actually care… Till you see me standing there


Details | Free verse | |

Return To Dust

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

I'll See your face again
I swear it
No matter how far away they take you from me
Fading, Going Away, Don't be so afraid
Death is a Dream


The Cross Will Be lighter
Whisper the words
so sacred, so somber

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

A Fallen Angel looms over the lifeless stone
What Happened here must be true
I must live this life without you

Breaking the Silence
She began to Weep
The Epitaph ceasing to know 
We all must Return To Dust

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

After the Casket Falls
After your soul is called
After your final breathe is drawn
I'll meet you again

The solitude is euphoric as an illusional clock
Of argentine fears swallow the last soul
Goodnight black rose of eternity
Goodnight dearest gothic phantom
Tonight The Earth consumes me




**Special Thanks To My Writing Partner Cayla Carr**


Details | Rhyme | |

The Bourgeois and the Spinning Wheel

In a room filled with a solitary red hue
The bourgeois spins a wheel
With no destination, nor need
She will spin until her brittle Hands bleed
Just to satisfy her ennui and artifice
But she does not see - the rien I see
The monster approaching her empty dreams

Spinning still - she does not know
The insomniac rose will begin to grow
The thorn of clandestine and ebony
Ostracized for he began to realize
What lies in nonsense is decadence
Which sparks interest
Who's lover is a dadaist
But his story is over now
As Seth lead the way
A poet dies in dismay

The thorn as she spun penetrated
A distraction and a lack of action
She knew the temptation for she so loved the sensation
Of crass, rebellious - ways 
The thought laid it's seed
In her Gaulish mind it breeds
She has no other need and no regrets
So she proceeds and the smile lets
With full intention and desire
Caring none of her fate that will transpire 
She presses her finger on the thorn 
So now she bleeds knowingly
she did not recede


Details | Verse | |

Melancholy Memory

I heard the sad news, just as the radio played our Jim Croce' song.... Did they know?.... ... It became our song,.... the spring we turned fifteen.... and gave us an excuse.... to be close... You were so patient sharing your guitar, and teaching me about frets strings, the bridge My fingertips sore, you took my hand in yours.. gently rubbed and, kissed them one by one Did we know young love only has one season? 'Time In A Bottle' was all we had


Details | Rhyme | |

Open Your Wrists

Open your wrists
Let the blood leak out
In a crimson river of tears

Allow it to fall
Upon tile grounds
Making the color unclear

Open your mouth
Let a scream slip out
And echo against lonely walls

Allow it to linger,
To fill quiet airs
Then back in your ears, let it crawl

Open your mind
Let it cluelessly wander
With nothing clouded in your brain

Allow it to focus
On life or on death
And if scars will forever remain

Open your heart
Let it never forgive
Those who've caused wounds so deep down

Allow it to rage
Against misunderstanding,
Let it yell the loudest silent sound

Open your wrists
Let the pain leak out
In a crimson river of sorrow

Allow it to fall
Upon off-white grounds
And remember there's always tomorrow


Details | Lyric | |

Lunar Love

Can this ever stop The world is blacked by the lunar love All the tides have gone undone The seas beckon us with their rage Will they ever calm The mist covers our sight The storm comes Her eyes are the color of dyed blue With her raven hair and crimson lips She sleeps quietly waiting for the innocence of me But I've already put her in vain And tossed her aside I've already condoned my belovéd The desire was so much I couldn't face it In the eyes Forgetting the shame is just a Another winless game Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love The moonbeams light up my pale face I don't want to be seen Banished from this world I'll ever be Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love I cry but the sun cant hear Do I exist? This eclipse took over Now I'm left to face it all Left in the dark where can we go Lunar love is what we'll be Lunar love is what we have Fly away from the scene The tides are blind from the madness Even to the mountains they'll kiss The storm is too much The desire was so much I couldn't face it In the eyes Forgetting the shame is just a Another winless game Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love Lunar love is what we'll be Lunar love is what we have The moonbeams light up my pale face I don't want to be seen Banished from this world I'll ever be Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love The ghosts are tangled in my dreams They play with what was meant to be forgotten But I know there must be a away To find the closure But so lost are we So lost I've been Save yourself from the downfall How close are we to the edge This is what the rage has done This is what the sin has done The desire was so much I couldn't face it In the eyes Forgetting the shame is just a Another winless game Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love The moonbeams light up my pale face I don't want to be seen Banished from this world I'll ever be Take me away from this Take me away from the Lunar Love Lunar love is what we'll be Lunar love is what we have Forgetting the shame is just a Another winless game


Details | Free verse | |

Draconian I

[The Cypress Is In Bloom]
The cypress is in bloom
I see the evil, the efflorescence of decadent doom
Eloigning, with thy clandestines of the Dead September's reign
My belovéd Penelope, abscond from the coven so deep, the glades of misery
We must face her in the grove, for arcany, the path we must take
She's in my mind, vaporously,
Lauding with my, dangers and fears
Lie, with ephermelcy's broken truths
Leading me go Cypress, Marigold
Immortally, willows, forevermore
Forevermore

[To Question; To Know]
My argentine silence, your only condonicy 
Ends with such eath
The Mockingbird in me--died
Resting in one ounce, an abundance of shame
With an infinity of joy
Exiled, by the ones, who give all, names
My breath starves for only more
The façade, the veil, the austerity dims with Aquarianlore 
She falls to her knees, why for?
Celandine she will be
Celandine is she

[Bead]
The lair within, free from their causalities of their sins
Shadowy primroses begin to grow, the season will never end
In there I dream to be like you, violet blue, White Flower of Lisieux,
La Fleur Blanche du Lisieux,
So Celandine are you
Celandine are you

[Draconian]
Draconian--Reach for the shadows within
Draconian--Break from The Fallen's Sin
Draconian--Their Empirical lies, only die
Draconian--Reach The Shadows Within


Details | Rhyme | |

Lydia's DaddY

...eyes puffy                       
      caked up with cry

Daddy ain't comin' home
       but 
         she don't know why...
 
grown folk sadness
         ripping inside her

       All she's known about lovin's 
               in the coffin beside her


Details | Free verse | |

Returned To The Source

There was no mention of your name, yet, it matters not Watching as your body laid broken, when they took you away Felt a stab in my heart; as tears rolled down my face And my mind ran to your Mom, probably making dinner plans As the story of your final moments began to unfold Another young life stolen in a most horrific way! Not through any fault of yours; nor by God’s design This creature from the deep mistook you for prey So much faster and stronger, it simply overpowered you So sleep now, little one- nineteen years is what you had I’m sure your task was completed; your forever now begins Never again to be snatched away by man nor beast I pray your family finds comfort in one ultimate truth The light which was within you has returned to the Source! *Note: For the 19 Year old who lost his life today in CA...+RIP
10/22/10


Details | Rhyme | |

Box of Sharp Objects

All my secrets hidden
In the color of red
Filled with my sharp objects
That I keep under my bed

No one would ever know
I look happy don't I
But I'm not because I have a secret
So I look alive

Full of life they said
But I'm not
I'm dead
But I fought

Fought against myself
But how could you ever win 
That's the problem you don't
You die with every sin

No one knows why or how
And for a second they care
But they never really did
All they did was stare

So I grab my box
Soon see blood running down my skin
That's when I feel alive
But I still could never win

Win my own battle against myself
So I just listen to the rattle
Of my sharp objects


Details | Free verse | |

The Drone

 You use it every day.
 It is a basic part of life now.
 Maybe it’s the flicker of the radio
 Or the buzz of a computer.
 It is used every day to make our lives simpler and less stressful. 
 Is it really helping us though?
 It does make our life simpler
 But is this a downward spiral into emotionless and effortless life?
 A life where instead of real soldiers with real emotions
 are sent to fight,
 A drone controlled by someone at a computer is used to kill innocent civilians. 
 The drone is emotionless.
 No compassion for other beings and no feeling of guilt or regret.
 This is the future,
 an emotionless drone controlled by someone at a computer. 


Details | Narrative | |

Untitled #305 / The Traffic Teacher's Tale

They locked eyes. Engines revved and roared.
When the light flashed green, tires screamed across the pavement,
other horns were honked, and a cup of Coke
flew across the lane divider into the lap of the second driver
even as the car of the first driver veered off
into a ditch, overturned, cabin
crunched into a tree
and three souls rode their last.
The traffic teacher says we must control our emotions, but I know
this is impossible. Emotion binds the heart of every human.
We can control our responses to these feelings, or else
ignore them entirely.
I wish I could choose the latter.


Details | Blank verse | |

Cutting Deep

  Paper-thin, metallic blue deepening further, slicing down, across from bone to bone. 
Garnet rivers, pooling into oceans, staining... Screams, screams fade “CALL AN 
AMBU..l..a....” (gone). A single response, a tear, gliding down... swift, before fading to 
black.


Details | Lyric | |

Cellar Door Escape The Fate

We walk through the doorway, heard you calling from the hall
To find you in the bedroom not breathing at all
I drag your body to the cellar where we lay, 
the wax it melts away, 
I kiss your face...
Now we are starting to love you more,
your body's on the canvas, 
That I painted on the floor
Now you wait,
like the drug, 
like the change in the pain it goes on for so long
And oh,
now it hurts in the worst way, 
now that you're gone, 
its so wrong,
its so wrong....
If I could take you somewhere,
I'd take you to my darkest place, 
scatter you in art forms, admire the whore,
beauty in different ways your hands on picture frames, 
your eyes in the glass wear your face as a mask
Now they are starting to love you more, 
a gallery of your beauty no charge at the door
As you wait, 
like the drug, 
like the change in the pain it goes on for so long
And oh, 
now it hurts in the worst way, 
now that your gone, 
it's so wrong, 
it's so wrong....
And down below your veins run dry your vacant eyes, 
I lost control your face is pale, 
your body's cold
And down below your veins run dry your vacant eyes, 
I lost control your face is pale, 
your body's cold
(face is pale your body's cold )
Wait, like the drug, 
like the change in the pain it goes on for so long
And oh, now it hurts in the worst way, 
now that your gone, 
it's so wrong, 
it's so wrong...



Details | I do not know? | |

Why Should We Live?

Why should we live if we have 
nothing to live for?
Why should we live if we have
nothing to die for?
Why should we live if 
no one cares?
Why should we live if you're
loved by no one?
Why should we live if no
one likes you?
Why should we live if 
no one loves you?

Each day is just a day
Each day is a day closer to death.
What's the point of living?
Some may say none,
Others may say why.
Why should we live?
Tell me and I will think about your answer.


Details | Free verse | |

My Mask

It hurts all the time
This pain in me never stops
I want to cry for you
I want to scream for you
I want to beg for you
I want you to be here
This cant be fair
This cant be real

But I smile and I laugh
I get up every morning to go to work
Throw on a happy face and make some jokes
I come home and enjoy my day
I have fun
And I continue on
But I’m so hurt
I’m so lost

Seeing you in there killed me
I could never get the phone call out my head
The screams from my mom
The walk up there to see if it was true
But most of all I wont forget you
In the casket
Touching your hand
You were so cold
You didn’t belong there
Seeing you go into the ground
Seeing them fall apart
Feeling my heart break into pieces
When all I could do is scream
I will never forget that day

And every time I smile I want to cry
Every time I laugh I want to cry
Every time I think I want to cry
Every breath I take takes a little bit out of me
Because I want to cry

I want this to not be real
I want to had spend more time with you
I want to hug you
Laugh with you 
Tell you I love you
That I was always there
That I am still always here

I am so broken
But I continue on with life

Because God took you and not me
He wanted me here for a reason
So ill continue on for
You
I will laugh
And smile
And pretend
Anything to make it to the end
To see you

I miss you just isn’t enough
It doesn’t mean enough


What heals a broken heart?
Time they say

But time wont bring you back
So my heart stays broken
As I pretend to smile

I miss you
I miss you
I miss you


As I’m falling apart

My mask then goes on



RIP Bebo... 17 was to young


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Woe Is Me

Words have no more Meaning I find myself Deadlocked In an Ethiopian Night I Could go recklessly on But with what Hope? Will I Glide on? The Only thing I can find is woe only woe, only me, woe is me Voided since the start I'm contradictory in Armenia desert Mountains are more like rusty daggers pierced in my stomach; what else is there but pain? only pain, only me, pain is me


Details | Couplet | |

The Deadly Dart

Wherever I go through out my whole life,
I end up struggling with lots of strife.
Thinking that my life is a total waste,
Wanting it to be over in a haste.

I can feel the pain inside my own heart,
Like someone through at my a deadly dart.
The wound is easing deeper and deeper,
Will the pain ever stop getting bigger?

Feeling emo is never a good thing,
Cutting your arm makes a really bad sting.
Blood is dripping from my arms and my heart,
Failing to dodge the largest deadly dart.

Drowning in all the lies and self pity,
I live each day but always feel sh*tty.
I have lots of thoughts about suicide,
But then I think about those who have died.

Those who have died not just from suicide,
But also those who are really nice guys.
...
...
...
...This "poem" was actually suppose to be a couplet (on any thing you want) for my english 
class but i made this kind bcuz i was feeling emo that day...and also after i was done i read it 
over and it almost sound like a rap song which, i guess, is kinda funny and cool.........


Details | Free verse | |

Valentine's Day

A Valentine's Day dedication for those who have lost a loved one.



I know you're watching from far away.
So I'll find the strength to kneel and pray,
and send you our love this Valentine's Day.
God gives me the power to understand,
that we can no longer hold your hand.
The sands of time pass graciously,
until we meet for eternity.
My unconditional emotion has no end.
Like the flowers in the spring and your spirit in the wind.
My hands are empty without you to hold.
My soul cries out alone in the cold.
My tears still fall and I wipe them away.
God gave me the strength to kneel and pray,
and send you our love this Valentine's Day.


Details | Free verse | |

The New God

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart beats out of your chest
Ready to consume the final climax
I know who you are - when the lyrics fail to resemble
Letting your poison drip straight from your lips
Portraying, entertaining the image of sex's delusion
You know only rape - manifestation of hate
Lack of the fruit of the beauty of a human mind
Depths you'll never penetrate!

She was only a doll - type of a lost father's adore
Impaled into a desperate whore
Shamefully out of broken safety's  choice 
She bore embryogenesis of morose
May your rusty blades caress as they please

So confront the masses with the halt of embryogenesis
Let the worship of machines be
Leg them construct us cell to cell
Nature's just in the way
Of our race of perfectly engineered machines!
The burden of conception
Surrenders to the will of
The New God
   


Details | I do not know? | |

Letting Her Go

Fear runs through her entire body,
As she takes the dagger from her boyfriends case.
She quietly walks through the kitchen,
Writing a note telling him everything will be okay.

The open door lets in a cold winter breeze,
Her bare feet sinks deep into the snow.
She kneels on the ground holding the dagger in her hand,
And she thrusts it into her chest nice and slow.

The pain is excruciating but she keeps on going,
She feels the blood run down her fingers,
As she fights blacking out,
The dark begins to linger.

Her mind was made up,
But now she made the mistake,
She left her love behind,
She’s fighting to say awake.
She opened her eyes as wide as she could,
To look up into the face of her love,
He felt the warmth of her blood.

He carried her to the car,
And drove as fast as he possibly could,
Arrived at the hospital,
With thought he misunderstood.

“Why would she take her life,
She knows I love her so,
I never thought this day would come,
The day I had to let her go.”


Details | I do not know? | |

I will not be forgotten

its the end inside my head
  i must say goodbye my dear 
friend 

im entering the unknown
im slowly starting to unravel 
and become unsewn
 you must not figure who i am 
for i am no one 

no one to be loved, no one 
forgotten, no one to grieved 
when the end is truly received
 
i will not be one loved, i will 
not be one forgotten
  for there there there is 
nothing to forget
  but this mere note of 
uncertainty and confusion 


Details | Lyric | |

The Escapist's Plea

When you can longer run away from yourself
When you thought there were no more tears to cry
When you just want to die
Living like this consumed by the façade of a million lies
So many years, so many days
Waking up to people who no longer care you're there
You ask how can this be, one short organic vitality
Wasted with living; the slowest way to die

The shadows of shame weigh you down 
Until you drown, filled with only their hate
All you can turns grey, and all you ever loved fades
The agony is all you know, thank you pain
A self-sadist Is all you have become, j
ust how they showed you, craving so much more
Just to hide up all of the misery
But under cloth it still bleeds

This is the Escapist's Plea
For the one who fall to their knees in misery
Trying to stay sane but fall under September's rain
Dying from the invisible disease, only you can see
Stigmatized by their sadistic need
Only if I could just fly away
...Fly Away


Details | I do not know? | |

Goodbye My Love

Goodbye
February 7th
You died
Leaving my broken heart behind
I cried
Darkness never looked so nice
Depression never made me feel
more alive
When your birthday comes
I will visit your grave
Sit beside you and pray
Talk to you
Wishing I could see you face to face
In heaven it won't be the same









Cody died February 7th, 2011. He committed suicide. He was born October 16th, 1993. I miss u Cody and I love you 
forever. ~~


Details | Bio | |

Remember Me

Iv been there for you everytime you needed me,
Iv been there for you in case of an emergency.
I held your head while you were weak,
I whipped the tears off your cheeks while you were sick.

I brought you medicine when you had the flu,
I helped you out in any way I knew. 
I made you smile when everyone around you made you sad,
I cheered you up when everything was going bad. 

But now when I need you the most you are not here,
I'm down on my knees crying now and catching every single one of my tears.
I know all your secrets because I wanted to know how to help you,
But you don't even bother asking me how my day went, ain't that true? 

Iv done everything in my power to make you into the person you are today,
But now I'm reaching out to you, but you give me a smirk and walk away.
I guess this is what I get for being the person that I am,
I might of raised my voice on you, but that that just to make you into a man.

God created all men equally, why should I be any different from anyone else,
I treated you like I treated everyone, with discipline, love, care, without a mess.
I guess this is what I get for being raised by the streets,
Everytime someone went off on you I was there to have your back like the streets.

But now I feel alone and don't see anyone by my side,
I thought you would help me, that's why I cried. 
Now that my heart is barely beating, I want to say I love you,
Remember me as your teacher, care taker, soldier, your brother. 


Details | Lyric | |

Son Of A Gun

I was born half human half demon
Killer of love
I was born with a gun in my hand
The Son of a gun
Satan Worshiper
A Natural Born Killer

I walk down the hallway
Hiding my gun in my trench coat
Wearing my hat backwards
My combat boots
And my army pants
Sunglasses hiding my face

I wait for you in the Library
As i approach you
You run and hide
Under a table
Me taking my gun out of my trench coat
Holding it towards your face
You cry
Your freaking out

Your last tear hits the floor
I pull the trigger
You were the guy
That made fun of me
Calling me a freak
Tripping me in the hallway

Remember throwing bloody tampons
In my face?
Calling me gay?
Telling everyone about my personal pains?
Ive got you now
You cant hurt me anymore
But i can still hurt you

Dedicated to ~4-20-99~ "Columbine Massacre"
Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold

"We can stop bullying, if we honestly tried"

"You could have prevented this school shooting, if you would have just listened to the kids who did it"






Details | Rhyme | |

Confessions of a Young Man

If you believe I was born to fall in love with other men
Then, you’re not familiar with this life
No one is ever born into this filthy sin
If it’s so, there’s was no need for the one called “Jesus Christ”

Make no bones about it, we deny Him, when we chose to chose this choice
As it is, to hide our guilty conscience and pretend to make peace with it
We begin by convincing ourselves that the wrong is merely right
And you joined in…with the conspiracy, thinking you were being such a good friend but, instead you helped in making iniquity normal in the end

I begged! I pleaded for months with my accomplices! “Please, please repent”!
I wanted to embrace what’s light and out all these lies! The propagandas of homosexuality!
But, then ones who yelled out acceptance loudest were the ones who then, threatened …
To shorten my life’s and its own expectancies 

“No, the truth can’t get out” they said. Oh! The evil of this society
But, now we have to emulate the lie by teaching it to our very little kids
Why must we take away their innocence? Why must also start putting confusion into teens?
Guess what? If you’re not born with it, you can now choose a gender in an elementary classroom quiz

God, I am only twenty four years old…
Why couldn’t I understand what I was doing before it grew too late?
I know you love me but, before I loved you, I so much more loved the world
In my end, I am glad to have found a true friend and I’m sure he’ll miss me as he relates my confession, of a young man who died from aids.


This piece is a confession related to me, from a young man named “John” whom I spoke with for several months on Sundays after church.  “The whole lifestyle is akin to a brainwashing by peers and one’s self” said John.       ©copyright 1996


Details | Free verse | |

The Trial of the Brazen Boy

Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Who knows not what good to do
You forget your manners
Respectful to none but those with a gun
And thus having broken all the rules
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Who in spite of a good mother’s love
Shows no kindness, sympathy, nor compassion
You follow not the Golden Rule she taught
But seek only ill-gotten crimes of passion
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Thy callused heart strings untuned
What innocence is left with in your breast
What values have you for those that adored you
Having their hope replaced by your dope
Is this the life you envisioned
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Your once good name now vulgar
Your pants hang low so your butt can show
And you believe it’s sexy
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Death and violence amidst your comrades 
Will bring about your destruction 
Thy family of gang which kill, cheat, and steal
You lay still in a red pool of clay as they mock you
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy
Stand before thy creator
For your life for right you tossed for the left
Only now do you weep for the Savior


Details | I do not know? | |

When I died

When I left this world without you,
I knew it made you blue.
Your tears fell so freely,
I watched; I know this is true.

While you were weeping,
Days after I passed away.
While all was silent within me,
I saw you kneel to pray.

From this wonderful place called heaven,
Where all my pain is gone.
I send a gentle breeze to whisper,
"My loved ones, please go on."

The peace that I have found here,
Goes far beyond compare.
No rain, No clouds, No suffering-
Just LOVE from everywhere.

You need not to be troubled,
Just stay close to God in prayer.
Someday we'll be reunited,
My love, HIS love surrounds, you always, and forever.

(please rate and comment this im competing for the contest)


Details | Lyric | |

The Chase

It's the beginning
So far away
Yet tethered
Until forever has reached its end

A circle
Never ending
Ever lasting
Until you reach me at last

I can feel you
I can hear you
But I can't change my course

Gripping and ripping
The breath from my chest
Ragged and racing
Destined for facing
Eternal rest

The path has narrowed
The walls screaming in my ears
Forever harrowed
Blood running like tears

I can smell you
I can see you
But I can't change my course

It's the end
You're upon me
It's the end
There's nothing left
It's the end
There's no way out

You have sought me
You have caught me 
It's the end of my course


Details | Ballad | |

Therion

Slayer of dreams and reality Bow down to his Therion Majesty Vowed to Be beyond Spiritual Supremacy, But too Frail, but too Weak, Were these words of The Transgressor of Our Argentine Destiny Reigned with Blood And with Blood You shall Fall Never denounce the ways of The Wicked For the Wicked you Have Become I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself Look beyond the Book, See the Truth lying there, Gagged and Hooked, Silence screaming to Be Free The Draconian Revelation Will Save thee The same Cold Pressure has erupt inside The Beast dwells in your Pride Dipped in Argentine and Insanity, Captivated by the touch Never looking beyond the Sin, For the Scene remains Empty I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself In your mind When the world Falls, Parodiso will open her halls But not for you, Inferno Cries out for you Forever Malaoda will Be your destiny I'm Not your gracious Jesus Christ, Saving you from the blood-sodden Ice, But you Are The Beast Therion Majesty Can't control your own destiny The one who used to fight monsters, Became a Monster Himself


Details | Rhyme | |

The Truth That Was Hidden

I'm  sitting here in this room,
thinking to myself about the past.
How I had bloom...
though, it didn't last.

God, everyday I am lying.
Everyday I put on my mask.
I always end up crying
since no one dares to ask.

I stopped talking to my friends,
cut them all loose.
For this is the end,
and we all knew I would lose.

Everyone around me thinks I'm better.
since all they see are lies.
They should know better!
Even though I'm in disguise.

I put on my fake smile
and laugh along with everyone around me.
I think everyone is in denial
since they can't obviously see

They act like nothing happened.
like... I faked the whole incident.
They honestly don't know what happened,
or why I caused that incident.

They believe that I was never "broken"
just that I wanted attention.
I should have never spoken
and give them my full attention.

No one knows I've been skipping my pills,
everyone thinks I take them.
Maybe I'm saving them for the kill?
Who knows what I plan to do with them.

I throw up everyday,
only because I've grown used to it.
No one understands my ways
or why I keep quiet.

Sometimes, when I'm alone
and I see something I could use to harm myself.
I check to make sure I'm on my own
and start to look at myself.

First, I cry...because I oh so much hate my body.
Then, I hurt myself.
Proving that I am nobody.
and since I'm alone, and with no one else

I continue doing this 
until I see a drop of blood,
then it feels like bliss.
I continue sometimes, craving the blood.

Then when it gets too much,
I sit down
thinking... no one knows I do such
if they did...would they let me drown?

I bet they would.
Since everyone I have come to love, 
leaves me..just like they should.
because I'm nothing from above.

You might think I'm a blessing.
ha, I'm a curse.
I bet you were messing,
and just tried to keep it from getting worse.

but let me get this straight,
nothing you say or do,
will get me to leave this gate.
For this gate is where I was left to

be on my own.
to forget about help.
I was always alone,
never having anyone's help.

Just let me be,
I don't need your sympathy.
Can't you see?
It doesn't matter to me!

I'd rather have everyone hate me
than have you all pretend
because believe it or not, I can see
through all your acts that should come to an end.

You aren't my friend,
so leave me now.
This my end,
you mustn't know how.

I will write back soon,
for this is my only comfort.
I only shall come at the time of the moon,
for that is my hour of comfort.


Details | Verse | |

The Lost Child

The child lost
Wanders round
In the man of body
Without a growing understanding
Except the hand on gun
Loaded up with silent frustrations
Until the empty’s numb


Details | Lyric | |

Unnamed

Plugs you into my world
Turns my eyes 
Looking into my skull
Staring at my brain
Hoping to see what comes next
Takes my heart and rips it out
Dying alittle more
Shoots my gut 
And places my brain where my gut once lived
Takes my fingers and pushes them into my hand
So i just have nubs
Takes my head and crushes it
Little peices falling
Bleeding unto the ground
Dying alittle more
The unnamed feeling
Comes alive
Then it takes me away
Taking the chill off my life


Details | Lyric | |

Hold Me Now

Maybe this isnt something to say
to someone like you
someone i could never be
something i dont want anyone to see
so ill hold it in
until i explode
hold me now 
im standing on the edge of
the bridge
nothing to hold on to
I only want someone to save me
but how can you if your blind
and you cannot see the dangers around you
so you keep them until they get so close
to your face and finally explode
then you see
hold me now
cause im already 6 feet into the ground


Details | Rhyme | |

An Occult Fairytale

 
Throw all your roses in the air, For there is no need of love in this lair Corpses laugh and spin Spirits run and play, Under silver ash shadow Magical sparks fill you here, Luring into Sitra Achra Crypt of the Ancient Rosalinean, Majlis al Jinn Lilith’s dance seducing your inner core Nehema’s whispers throwing yourself off the shore, You hope this is only folklore, But you must not fear the dark The Nightmare of the Lost Ark Silents winds whisper Untold truths of revelation to Give you new Trust In Adoration Asphyxiate with Fear As Angelique's eyes Lear Silently you’ll the feel the spirits Of The Howling growing near The Draconian Aeon is here All foul humans beware Samael will always be Near


Details | I do not know? | |

I open the door in my head

This is not good, my life is misunderstood.
Running through a door that just wont open
Celebrating a lie that wasnt even chosen.
Climbing in  a window with no entrance
Trying to repent, struggling this instance..
Numbing the pain wont extract this mind game.
Facing the publicity minus the fame.

Paper to pen I dont know where to begin.
Lost in this world Im forced to live in.
Send me above or down below
At this point it doesnt matter which way I go.
Struck from the heart with things I could not come to part
This misery excisting is tearing me appart.


Details | Free verse | |

A Prayer For Healing

Father,
Do not let me be the demon I have created me to be.
I am the product of myself and my negativity.
I trust You.
I love You.
I thank You.
In Your name,
We pray,
Amen.


Details | Elegy | |

Time, Love, and Loss

He loves her. 
His love for her never ends. 
“Love is patient, love is kind.” 
The good book says. 
Time..
It is your best friend if you think about it. 
It is also your worst enemy; 
It shows no mercy nor welcomes your white flag. 
The sinister disguise of Death and his pale green horse,
Hung in offices, homes, and churches. 
12:08 pm.. 
Tears paint his face and the rain befriends him. 
12:35 pm.. 
Hugs, kisses, and condolences: 
“Love never dies.” 
“Love lasts for eternity.” 
“She will always live in you.” 
I don’t respond; 
I lack the strength. 
I have crafted up a bronze statue in my heart. 
Forever will my love be for her. 
Forever will I be her keepsake.  
The consequence of love is not a tragedy as I once believed. 
The tragedy is not understanding what love is. 
The tragedy is not being loved. 
My heart is now the way it should be.


Details | I do not know? | |

My soul in shreds

I use to be a whole person with a soul in one piece and my sanity in check.
Then you evil men called me “Fatso” out of hate and spite.
This made me break and snap in too many ways.
I can’t control it my hand has risen and crash.
My fist has plunged into his head what is happening I can feel myself shredding.
And being just remainders of what I use to be this madness of hate is consuming.
But to tell you the truth it makes me feel happy on the inside that these disgusting people’s 
blood.
Is now raining upon my skin I crave it I love it that this justice is served warm and red and 
covers my skin.
Now the police are coming but I welcome them because my sanity has left and my soul is 
shredded.
Now bleeding my will to live I will end my own life before they can get to me goodbye SMASH!! 
“Blood spills in pools on the floor.” 


Details | Alliteration | |

She girl

She lives with friends.
She meets her loves.
She starts her work.
She sits as a dove.
She runs her life.
She's got all that.
But then she's found
Dead on the track.


Details | Blank verse | |

A Brighter Day

I just looked at your face and seen no smile,
It was so bright and so happy that you could see it from a mile.
I can't believe this tragic thing had happened,
I'll never see your precious face again cause of what happened. 

Your eyes are closed and you breath no more,
You lay there like and angel, and your soul looking up at the heavens door.
The box is cold and all so small,
Your spirit begs for it to run away so far.

So save me a seat up stairs little sister, cause im coming soon,
Ask God for me to forgive my soul cause I have been such a fool.
I couldn't protect you when you needed me most,
But your protected for ever now by our Lord and our host. 


Dedication to: Olga Kuznetsova. R.I.P


Details | Rhyme | |

bloody red roses part 2

     She lies in a pile of bloody red roses

She left a note to her folks  saying

" I cant go on im sorry"

      It didnt say why

But still we cry

      We are all very sad

some of us are mad

       none of us are glad

She'll b greatly missed

        To me she was like a sis

But when will the rumors stop

        Noone knows the truth not even the cops

My pain is great 

       I wish we hadnt been late

But when we got there 

        there she lay 

on her already made bed of

Bloody red roses


Details | Haiku | |

this lifeless tot -- Florida

an innocent child,
a nineteen-month-old baby,
was senselessly shot;

cold drive-by shooter
killed a cherished little boy--
with a heartless plot

endless tears of pain--
as we remember the love
of this lifeless tot


*baby was not the intended target


Details | Free verse | |

Teacher

I am who I am though much changed since.

Could compare a life to the changing seasons like the summer heat that dies fast 
in the bite of October air,
or the colder December winds.

And very little time passes. 

Hearing the song softer now, I remember how it was then.
The days and smallest moments that carved both painful and painfully beautiful scars
into the easiest of memories.

Like films of dust that cover everything not often used, 
but waiting.

And to think about what should’ve been,
between the lazy distance both too far gone and almost nothing but a short coming 
home to find it just as it was,
only touched by the dust of a few years,

Is useless.
Just as it was then,

when it was us and a boy we all knew,
(or thought we knew the kind)
his awkward form sitting tall with a measured confidence that knew we were 
watching, 
(and using him for another good time)
and still seemed easy enough on the surface to show us
he was like the rest of us-

A child like us.

Fighting and claiming and fighting the uncontained wisdom of children.
But he, ahead of his time, 
got up from his desk and painted his own stairway to heaven
and we watched while he climbed.

Believing that he was old enough and wise enough
to measure speed and resistance.
That that would be enough to maintain the strongest and most fragile of us.

But instead, as we walked silently between the pews he taught us 
something useful.


Details | I do not know? | |

All The Same

I am weak and strong
For keeping my life,
And they were strong and weak
To hide their strife and
To let it death take their own life.
It is not a matter of strength,
Because the truth is
We are and were
All the same.


Details | Lyric | |

Suffering Is The Same As Living

Hope, tonight, is just a void Love is destroyed Reality impending my doom Suffering a dream that was never made for me I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me Don’t worry I’ll be fine I can just wait, wait as in all eternity You deserve to be happy and free I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me Suffering is the same as living Tonight I might, Today I may Set you free away from me I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me You travel all across in my veins Showing you share my pain But my life was never meant for me I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me I'm sorry for those days I've ruined your life Best you just ignore, forevermore I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me Suffering is the same as living Tonight I might, Today I may Set you free away from me I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me Suffering is the same as living Tonight I might, Today I may Set you free away from me I’m just the burden falling under your arms I understand if you give up on me
**Morten Veland, Guitarist, Male Vocalist and Main Songwriter of Sirenia, formerly of Tristania**


Details | Lyric | |

Hiding

Hide my face
the things i cant let you see any longer
Cover the scars
the things that still unravel in my soul
Sow my mouth shut
the things that should not be said
Cut my brain out of my skull
the things that i should not remember
Tie up my hands 
So i cant hurt anyone
Tie up my feet
So i cant run away from my problems
Stitch up my heart
So i can fit the pieces back together
Hide down in a hole
So that one day i can be discovered


Details | Rhyme | |

Brittney Sweet Brittney

Brittney sweet Brittney
why did you leave that day
why would you ever 
want yourself to go away
I know they said
you weren't in love
but I know what ya'll had 
was a love from above
I guess maybe it was your time 
to be gods angel
but Brittney you left us all
mixed up and strangled
you were only fifteen 
when you took your last breath
I guess they really did 
put you and Sean to the test
you said in a note your love
was like Romeo and Juliet
a love ones heart 
could never forget
Sean said even death 
couldn't do your love apart
This you meant because march 20th
you stopped your hearts
together you lay there in silence
as I weep and ask god for his guidance
Brittney sweet Brittney 
why did you have to go away..


Details | I do not know? | |

Trying,,

You lie awake at night, Thinking,

Wondering, Searching through the webs of Lies,

Death, Cheat, Heartbreak that life has brought you.

There's no one to help you near by.

No one to comfort you.

To tell you everything will be fine.

You're on your own.

You can die trying 

OR

You can die trying Alone.

-Brittany- 
(thank you for reading and if you may please comment and rate i like to read what people say.. thank you)


Details | Ballad | |

Diedre II

Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode I cunnan sense her embrace that felans gelic Tragedy A Heart to hath, slipped beneoðan waw The dark pulse nou beckons us closer How many daegs will this passion bledan way We will beon the ans left to blame Bewarian we hath be-came their prey They say thou hast ben addicted to thy pain A life-leas cold barren soul left to die in the rain A whisper to close to the edge A ceallian fram the dark Bringan ut a saving sparke An exodus fram her pain Her life spent braeð in shame A Shadow ceallian brecans the silence Eom I the an to blame Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deirdre naefre said wrong Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode “My decadence wesan just for thee Though thou never hast cared of what I hath been through Enter the world hwaer empathy is clandestine A world created by thee, just for me Hwaet is lecgan in my heart Is why thou wants to through the stan” I call thy name towards nightfall’s reign But they take thou so feorr way A dark engel so devin Cursed by Eden’s Heart I will avenge every tear An exodus fram her pain Her life spent braeð in shame A Shadow ceallian brecans the silence Eom I the an to blame Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deirdre naefre said wrong Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode Don thoust not know Deidre’s eode


Details | Rhyme | |

A Farewell Flight

Once I've seen the sun fade,
And the summertime die,
Please tell me, where is it
You are going to fly?

I'm destined for the South,
A mysterious town,
So please take me with you
On your journey down,

My wings are long-fallen,
But please fly me there,
So at last I can feel
Heaven's breath through my hair,

For I know once I land,
You will flutter away,
And my freedom no longer
My Fate can delay.


Details | Free verse | |

Sanguinary Lord

A severe façade of loving tolerance Dipped in an argentine semblance The Consuls of The Cross Weaving a sweven of Welkin Where the checkered ones Are never allowed Their souls cast into the flames Of a greater decay The never ending pit Of eternal torment You turn the other cheek The one that wields the clandestine dagger The dreams of being free grow lighter and light The truth is shrouded by sister-Night Clinging onto existence Never eluding the resistance I will never adhere To your Sanguinary Lord Bestowing The Crusader’s reign Against the sand and the desert’s wane Barraging him over the frame In desperation to appease Screaming and shouting I will wash away your sins Decadence of the ones to throw the stones The ones to enforce the book Has left your lies dry and ready to die No more tears are left to cry No more screams are left to scream No More blood to be split No more graves to be dug


Details | Ballad | |

A Question of Honor

Dedicated to Noor Al-Maleki You Try, You Try so hard To put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views You Have set me Free, Can't You See I Won't have to face a Tyrant anymore Your gaze used to Stun But Now It Just Burns Under the Sun Never Enough to Be Myself Never Enough to Be Free I will not Bow to You I will not Kneel Before You Smothering Liberty Condoning Freedom This way is unjust This way only brings out our worse Hatred and Mistrust War and malice no know law You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views I am The Flame you Greatly Hate I am The Flame you greatly fear Some cannot handle the truth It shows they are the Criminals You are one of them You're the problem This misdeed will not live on without the hate of your name Honor Is not real It's just an emotion that only you feel You're another bulwark Against the truth No one Will Bow No one Will Kneel You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views You Fear The Truth You Fear the reality you are the criminal against all humanity We must end these lies Before Honor Will Strike again You Try, You Try so hard to put Your will Over Me But I will Remain Free I am So Dirty and So Very Unclean So Please Condemn me Sentence Me The Crescent Is A Lie The One I shall Try To Defy Is it Just To Dispose What Has Dishonored You and Your Radical Views


Details | Lyric | |

There Is No Age To Love

A meteor falls down from the stars
Catching fire the faster it falls

She sits in her new house
Sitting in the window seat
Reading a book about wild love
And how fast it grows and catches fire
She watches the meteor shower from her window
She hears a noise coming from the hallway
She creeps around the corner
As she follows the sound to the attic
She opens the creaking attic door
A young man sits before the window
In an old red chair
Half falling apart
He is facing her 
With the back of the chair facing the window
The attic door slams shut
She gasps for air
She is very afraid
He speeds and surely stands before her
Face to face
They meet
He asks her
"who are you?"
she replies
"Amelius, you?"
He moves back as he turns and his back faces her
"Eric"
He moves towards her slowly
And disapears
A few days past
She wonders where he is
She sits in the attic and waits for him
He appears behind her
She explains to him that she feels like she knows him
He sits by her on the bed
he explains there past life together
He returned to meet with her again
She died in a bathtub
He was holding her
Trying to wake her up from the pills she took
She died
After her funeral
He committed suicide
She moved on and became reborn again
He didnt because he was stuck in the past
He kisses her cheek
And she stands in awe
She does drugs in her new life
One night she was driving home
She was on acid
And she ran into a tree
She was dead on the scene
He shows up and pulls her out of the car
She thanks him for saving her
He reaches to hold her hand
"your cold"
She looks at him
"what? you mean im.."
He says "yes"
They leave together in peace
Where they should have been in the begining
His ghost soul is 46 years old
But his age of which he died is 19
She was 17 when she died the first time
The second time she died she was 19
her ghost soul is 23 years old
Love has no age



Details | Lyric | |

Wrong

This poem i am writing is about people i know. they have told me all the wrong things they are doing in life. all the things they have done to be in love or even find love.
Josh~i have a second life one in real life one on the computer
Susan~i cry to my poster of james hetfield begging him to find a guy for me
Jassun~i cut myself every night because i feel unloved my family doesnt get me
Chelsea~i take pills and try to overdose because i cant feel my heart beating i just want to know that im alive.
Ron~i constantly call another woman and have phone sex when my wife isnt home
Carrie~i boss people around just so i can feel like im on top above everyone else
Brad~im gay and people dont get the fact that love is love no matter if its with a guy or woman.
Sheryl~my husband passed recently and i already found someone on Eharmony
Me~sometimes i fake who i am so people wont judge me... sometimes i feel like im not good enough so i try to be like everyone so i can feel like im apart of something. but recently i figured out that people love you no matter who you are. there are some people out there who will doubt you and who will hurt you. but thats life even love can hurt the strongest of people.


Details | Rhyme | |

Mediocrity

Can't stand this mediocre life,
These mediocre friends,
Mediocre skills which mean that
Disappointment never ends,

Mediocrity is like my house,
Confidence is my door,
People keep knocking at it
Whilst I cower on the floor,

My dreams are mediocre,
For they never will occur,
Being kept alive for entertainment
Like a pet with thorns for fur,

I love my keepers for upon me
All their affection they bestow,
But still they keep me on this leash of life
And they will not let me go.


Details | Quatrain | |

The sounds of war

The sounds of war, 
Are far too real, 
Civilian's wounds, 
Too severe to heal, 

Wounded and dying, 
The dead line the streets, 
The fighting continues, 
Yet no heart longer beats, 

After the killing, 
What will be left? 
A world of corruption, 
Madness and theft, 

What are we fighting for? 
No-one really knows, 
There is no real reason, 
Yet the blood still flows, 

Innocent families, 
Torn apart by the war, 
When you look in their eyes, 
You see into their core, 

Sadness and sorrow, 
You can tell death is near, 
You want to get rid of, 
All the hatred and fear, 

Yet how do you stop, 
Another mans war, 
Please can you help me? 
Mend the hearts that are sore.

Copyright Kayla Yovich 2006


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Fallen Angel

Stephen Lewis RIP. Murdered 24-01-2009

FALLEN ANGEL 

Fallen angel, free to roam, 
Your soul hath gone to play.   
God took you in his loving arms, 
To heavens gates that day. 

Fallen angel, shining star, 
A brother, son and friend. 
Harshly taken from this world, 
Tho' you're with us to the end. 

Fallen angel spread your wings,   
In our hearts, your love, we keep. 
Your memory will shine on through,   
As we lay you down to sleep.   

Stephen Lewis RIP 

  A victim of the London culture of knife crime.  24-01-2009


Details | Rhyme | |

For My Dearest Love Jacob

     The dark black sky it glimmers,
     Brighter than the Sun.
     I look around this broken world
(I) see your the only one.
     When all the strength escapes earths roots,
     And floats out past the sea.
     And when the ground below me breaks 
     I know you'll carry me.
     All my hope is buried deep,
     Not just beneath the skin.
     But deep within my soul it lays
     Inspiring my pen.
     This Love I feel embraces me
     The black sky wraps me tight.
     Because of your bright shining eyes
     I know I'll sleep tonight


Details | Lyric | |

Canvas

Walking up the stairs
She lays on the floor
He runs
Holding her cold body in his arms
He lets a tear fall from his eye
Dragging her down the stairs and into the cellar
He lays her on the canvas they painted on the floor
He spreads her arms and legs out
Pointing them the direction of North, South, West and East
He places four candles around the circle
Lighting them with his lighter
He sits and watches as he pours the hot wax on her face
He cuts around her eyes, slowly taking her eyes out
Gluing her eye lids shut covering them with the wax once again
He cuts her up in pieces
Scattering her in art forms
Admiring her beauty
He places her eyes in a glass jar
Wrapping her hands around a picture frame
He places her face on his ... as a mask
Gluing her face unto his
He lays on the canvas that is now covered in blood
He moves around 
His clothes covered in her blood
He watches through her eyes
The world she once saw
He places her face back on the canvas
He shuts off all the lights and walks up the stairs
Looking in the bathroom he saw the drug she has been taking
He cuts it up and sniffs it
He lays on the floor shaking
Crawling down the stairs to the cellar door
Trying to move but he cant move any further
His heart stops beating but hes still alive
The minute he had left
He opened the door
And rolled down the cellar stairs
Landing on the canvas
His face next to hers

"How its hurts now that your gone
Its so wrong"


Details | Ballad | |

Josette, Drive the Faerie out of me

She's Lost--I'm the one left to blame Forsaken by my potent manipulating game I've killed the one, My starcrossed heart Desires ...But not By My hands I Try To Follow her ghost But the fog and mist are too strong My eyes are rendered useless "You're Never going to Find Josette" The netherworld Spirits sang I Won't lose Heart I Will Win this Fight For My Sacred Josette's Right to Life This is what happens when The Devil's Adovocate Falls for Jesus's Greatest Bride This is what happens When The life of the disease Loves the cure it desperately hates Drives you mad But Wasn't I already? Josette, I'm begging you To Drive the Faerie out of Me


Details | Rhyme | |

Locked away

its just a black whole yet its pulling me deeper 
there is no way to escape
I'm just another permanent keeper 
so i give it what i got and i try to fight
i try and try with all my might
 it all ends the same I'm not strong enough to fight
in the far distance i see a bright light
but its just false tormenting sight
I'm pulling myself together then its blowing me apart
faster than a speeding bullet or a tranquilizing dart
there trying to get me through it but its making me worse
i feel so alone and it makes me feel cursed

my pulse is getting stronger
death is quick but wont stop to wonder
the pain it causes like loud thunder
it screams in sight but leaves children to ponder 
i start to fall deeper and deeper 
and it gets me feel weaker 
my heart and lungs moving faster and faster
yet my suffering just keeps getting longer and longer
i feel my sanity seeping from my grip
i try to reach it but my soul starts to rip
all this pressure my knees start to buckle
and here i am a one-man shuttle
I'm zooming out of reach of my sanity
and sight of it makes me feel more and more panicky
but my head is held high and i cant admit defeat
even when the blood of an innocent starts to leak
I'm trapped in here with noway out 
and there all out there trying to break me out
heart cant take the pain and starts to crumble
my feet cant move so instead i stumble
I'm locked in yet i feel locked out
my heart and soul it starts to shout

then i see the knife like the glorious sun
my chance to get out its my my only one
i held the sharp metal to my skin
my life flashes before my life full of sin
i wake up now and I'm breathing quite fast

people they fall and shatter beyond repair
but we don't go near not even for a dare
its not our business so we leave it alone
even if its us that can finally bring them home.
the day now breaks in to the early morn
just a dream i think as a look at the dawn

they fort to guarantee that you may survive
like spider webs suck with the desperate flies
it's enough to cause your soul could rip
like a barely young adult being stripped


Details | Lyric | |

Demolition Lovers

"This time we will show them all how much we mean"

Walking into the school
Short blonde hair
Stunning blue eyes
Wearing make up on his face
The paint on his face
Is a skilled drawing of a skull
As he passes
Everyone starres
He keeps walking foreward
Not looking at them

She enters through the other end of the hallway
Long blonde hair
Deep brown eyes
Also wearing makeup on her face
A skilled drawing of a smaller skull
All the girls she passes
Starre at her
Wondering what kind of girl would 
Wear makeup like that

The Boy and the girl
Meet in the middle of the hallway
They hold eachothers hands
And continue down the hallway

Seeing them from behind
You read on his backpack
"I gave you my bullets..."
And on her bag you can see
"And i gave you my love"
They walk out of the school together
All the teachers starring
All the students watching there every move
They walk straight out to his car
A black Mustaine 1998
Before they get to the bridge 
He ties there hands together

They drive 10 miles
To a bridge
Theres a hill
A bridge
And a river
Hes going 90 mph
She clinches his hand
He looks at her with a smile on his face
She looks back at him pale as a ghost
The car jumps over the bridge into the river
The lovers dying on empact
Forever tied together by
The rope he tied earlier

Like a bed of roses
Theres alot of reasons
Why we are laying here
As we are falling down into
The pool of blood
I see your eyes
I mean this when I say forever.


Details | Free verse | |

I'LL SMILE 4 U

Stroll through the Illest Empire
So much heat feeling like we’re living in the fire
But we’re living under fire
Tell me how many shots must it take before my loved ones are crying at my own wake
Its time for a break from sad eyes I’ve seen grown men cry
It hurts to tell a loved one good-bye
It’s the same reason why they died
Hearts just too full of pride
Mothers praying their young’n wont be a victim of a homicide
Too many drive-bys blood shed for a block you really can’t call mine
Wishing we could turn back time
High off of nickels’ and dimes
Making moves to boost your grind looking for hope
But the hustle got us in a head choke
Don’t blame me for acting crazy cause this how the streets made me and you
To watch our back and throw bows and cuss
Cause you got to be tough when times are rough
I know your asking when will enough be enough
And truth is I don’t know but this is how it goes down
But if I make it out will you smile for me now

So many families struggling with poverty
I don’t judge cause that use to be me
Watching mom come home late
Barley any food on our plate
So young and life we already hate
Praying God bring us something great
My clothes were cheap imitates and kids called you on them for being fake
Knowing mom bust her ass to provide
But all your knock offs you begin to hide
Ashamed of what you own
I know how you feel I been there too
I see mothers walking there kids to school
And the walk is far when you cant afford a car
Mom hoping one day you’ll be a star
I know about being next to poor
Your local neighborhood liquor market is your grocery store
Wishing you didn’t have to go through that living off of food stamps
Cube the neighborhood is a trap but we’ll all be free
So smile for you and me

Even 2pac said smile for me
This isn’t how its always going to be unless you let it be
In our different way we’re all a G
Cause we’re trying to make it straight legit
Whatever your hustle never quit but don’t lose yourself in it
Cause you still got a long ways to go
Still got a long time to grow
Use what you know to get by or you wont survive
Remember to always keep your dreams alive
Whatever it is just do it and never try
The limit is the sky so keep your heads held high
And when you come to a hard road just always know nothing can keep you down
You’ll be able to come back around
So give yourself a chance
And I’ll smile for you now

JUNE ‘06
B.K.M.jr


Details | Lyric | |

Disapear

Dont follow me
I am the thing that should not be
Nothing left to see
How could you blame me?
I got kicked out of school
Im nothing but a failed soul
Waste of life
Killin myself with every type of knife
I chose the wrong path
Couldnt find my other half
Soon i will disapear
Nothing... 
im not going to share
You dont not care
Im not telling you what you want to hear
These ending days youll live in fear
You dont like the things i wear
Falling into more dispare
Into the skies
Further into the stars
You will see
12-12-12
My ending is here






Details | Ballad | |

Shelly Cole

A bright Texas sun
Beat down upon this day
In the middle few should know
A teenage soul should stray

Stolen by a thief
With no apparent motivation
This man offered
No explanation

A mighty blast filled the air
She had wronged none 
All of a sudden
Her life was undone

Now robbed of her life
She shall carry on
With the pull of a trigger
She was forever gone

Yet carry on she shall
Carry on Shelly Cole
For your passing was
Out of your control

Happy you shall be
In the heavens above
Wings you shall have
Like that of a dove

Your beauty lives on
Long past your breath
It was near devastating
When informed of your death

Shelly, O Shelly
What has been done?
For your eyes where brighter
Than that of the sun

Though your body lies motionless
On that of the floor
Your soul shall undoubtedly
Live evermore

Carry on Shelly 
Carry on


Details | Free verse | |

lost, found, and liberated

i use to lie awake at night 
and ponder of this pointless life 
up for hours and not make a sound 
i once was lost but now i am found
my sea of confusion, like moses did part
the instant i let jesus inside of my heart...
but than i let out a gigantic huge fart 
and realized it was just indigestion 
than like a sensible person, i began to question 
and out of those questions, came rational thought 
and all of the things in school i was taught 
like critical thinking and following facts 
so i came to the conclusion: religions a quack 
now i live happily, in awe of earth's mysterious beauty 
and if you don't like it, you can kiss my patooty


Details | Rhyme | |

Angel

Imagine a lovely garden, tea for two, and this story . . .
So I guess you were in the Delafield Park that morning-
Police report says around 12 a-something
Yeah, I’m sorry, I wish you woulda called, texted, anything.
I woulda been there-oh wait I was there-always have been there.
Which is why people are sayin’ you didn’t hit me up-
You went to the wrong people, those who didn’t care.
-You must-a been so damn scared
I’m glad you’re off the streets, not in a cell, or in pain-
Maybe we just insane, baby
That makes two of us, trust me, I get those thoughts too-
Not strong enough to make me actually carry it through-
Jus’ don’t wanna leave my family and those I love, people like you.
But hey, I know God has a plan, and I understand the stuff you had to handle
Now I got a guardian angel, and I have your picture in my room
Next to the cardboard painting of
“I’ll Be In The Sky…I’ll Be There…Oh, Alright…”
So weird, thinkin’ I lost my best friend, my brother
Now we can always see each other, how ‘bout that?
Please watch over your family and everyone you love, and those you don’t.
Watch over ‘Milla too.  I never got to meet her, but I bet she loved you.
Hey, I love you too, you know that, of course, but ya know…just wanted to letchya 
know…
And little Emma too-man, she’s a special girl, she really loves her brother and she’ll do 
great in this world.
Man, remember that one time, two times, three times, at the movies?
Aha-I know you do.  
All the crazy things we did and been through-
Well I’m-a wrap this up, I took these lyrics from my rap
And I’m turning ‘em into a poem for English so I can get a grade
-Do well, and go to college, I’ma live for you
I love you, Fella<3

Kara Adams Sunday, August 14, 2011.


Details | ABC | |

Broken Cave

Lost in a hidden cave inside this little shell banging on the walls of glass creating these deep splintering cuts can't judge the person hiding when you haven't seen the tears that hide behind these eyes hiding inside the broken shell of a broken heart


Details | Lyric | |

America

Maybe your the land of the free
land of liberty and slavery
do what we want you to and dont throw a fit
suck it boy get over it

Land of liberty but can be arranged
still the land we call a cage
if you can make it away from the norm
just dont forget of the form

we want you!! x6

no one can heal our scars
better pray to the stripes and stars
put the rest in the past
say hello to the new low class

our soil is not complete
this land is guillotine
let out filth build up for all this time
fill yourself with american pride

we want you!! x6


Details | Lyric | |

Let's Party With the Wicked

The first big party of the year
Right after the pre-season game
A bunch of juniors and seniors take off
Driving around down the highway.
Pulling up to the designated house
Where the parents aren't at home
They don't know about the party
Their "honor student" has thrown.
Music is blasting from speakers all around
As people shove away couches to dance
Furniture's broken, but nobody cares
The party's a once-in-a-lifetime chance.
Things start to heat up
As guys bring in kegs of beer
Even freshmen took a drink, thinking,
"Total freedom; there are no parents here!"
Pretty soon, every thing's trashed,
And the people leave to go home
Late at night, right after that party,
People pull out onto the road.
Pandemonium wreaks havoc 
Twenty minutes after they leave
As all across the small town,
Cars begin to weave.
Cars crash like dominoes
In a simultaneous effect
Parents are in a panic
Wondering where their children have been left.
Bodies are splayed out all over the road
As metal tears and glass breaks
All of this, because of one little party
And because some students chose to drink.
Their best friends are in body bags
And their parents are engulfed in grief
And all because of that one party
And that stupid choice to drink.
Honor students now lay dead
Choir members in bags
Band players are gone forever
The other stories are just as bad.
Alcohol checks are administered
And even young ones are to blame
"It's not my fault, I was drugged!"
One sophmore dares to claim.
"It was just a little alcohol," they say,
As it rages through their system
"I didn't mean to kill anybody,
But now, I wish I were with them."
The nickname for this awful crash
And this tragic night
Truly lives up to its name:
"The Wicked has take flight."
Drinking and driving don't mix
And these students learned the hard way
It was just a little fun,
But their friends won't be back Monday.
Some say it wasn't their fault
And that everbody did it,
But really, everyone's to blame
For thinking, "Let's party with the Wicked."


Details | Lyric | |

For All My Pain

Your blood is what was Sacrificed And in Blood we Shall Bathe No more pain nor more hate Will be shed for me ...This is only a desperate dream A slight tender touch on the largest of wounds can leave you screaming for an eternity Dreaming of an escape, A friend from a figment of dark a world from the abyss of my mind Set to fix all of your transgressions Every time you left, abandoned, stranded, forget me A human heart has a limit but It's only I who is left to blame Drifting beyond Aphelion Why must the loudest of Cries Go unheard Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to Answer my Masked Prayers For All My Pain Constraining Me Making my Saturnine Mind Climb to the Apex Just to Fall again Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to answer all of my masked prayers For All My Pain Everyone turning against me I can't keep living a lie like this Lost In Life When death is the only hope Nothing is left to stay But the Fear of being afraid Let me lose this Let me enter another world Drifting beyond Aphelion Why must the loudest of Cries Go unheard Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to Answer my Masked Prayers For All My Pain Constraining Me Making my Saturnine Mind Climb to the Apex Just to Fall again Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to answer all of my masked prayers For All My Pain Drifting beyond Aphelion Why must the loudest of Cries Go unheard Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to Answer my Masked Prayers For All My Pain Constraining Me Making my Saturnine Mind Climb to the Apex Just to Fall again Maybe You'll know why I want Thagirion to answer all of my masked prayers For All My Pain


Details | Couplet | |

The Monster

The monster became a living, walking nightmare
my dive into insanity, no longer perfect, containing a blank stare

I should resist, the monster will find me, run away with me
Pretend to hear my meager complaints, force me to see what I'm afraid to see

Blame and guilt, volleying right and left, up and down
It's crashing me closer, with every step, I'm falling to the ground

It's all a game, just play along, play the game, play it well
Brimming confidence, dissolved in thoughts, of what? I won’t tell

Demons, devil born souls, run quick, run fast, stand my ground
No sense of fear, n sense of foreboding, not even a slight sound

High speed, pursuit of hell, bent on going, bent on crashing
Giving into the power, life's faster, lights flashing

Crash and torment me again, my eyes close after all
The beginning of the end for me, feeling numb after the fall

Is there a way out? I'm different, distant and moved on
Listen to the water, calling, coaxing into death, I'm gone

Endless, empty cloud; dreamless oblivion; oxygen, exhalation
Am I dead? Still alive? Broken into pieces, I need motivation

Reality closes in, walls me in; until there’s nothing there
Death comes behind me, containing a blank stare.


Details | Lyric | |

Crone

The warmth of the sun
Is gone with life
For now she's the one
Who rules these nights

(CHORUS):
Dark Goddess
Bringer of Death
Bringer of Darkness
Bringer of Less
One of the Darkness
One of the Night
Bringer of Wisdom
Bringer of Might
Come on swift wings
Great Goddess please come
End all my sufferings
The circle is one!

Waters to ice
The flowers have died
life covered in lice
For summer has lied

(CHORUS):
Dark Goddess
Bringer of Death
Bringer of Darkness
Bringer of Less
One of the Darkness
One of the Night
Bringer of Wisdom
Bringer of Might
Come on swift wings
Great Goddess please come
End all my sufferings
The circle is one!

Great Crone
Goddess of Death
Don't leave me alone
Pull me out of this mess

Winter has come
with death you now bring 
with darkness of love
Let freedom now ring

Death is a freedom 
Death is a light
Death is of wisdom
We return in the night!

(CHORUS):
Dark Goddess
Bringer of Death
Bringer of Darkness
Bringer of Less
One of the Darkness
One of the Night
Bringer of Wisdom
Bringer of Might
Come on swift wings
Great Goddess please come
End all my sufferings
The circle is one!


Details | Rhyme | |

Sally Carter's Grave

Many years ago when I was a daring youth,
I lived in a town where old legend held great truth. 
Halloween night friends would gather at west graveyard,
it made no difference that the entrance stayed barred.

We would scale the wall in search for her grave,
to prove to others how foolish and brave.
Rumors transcended she was a monstrous ghost,
only revealing to ones she disliked the most.

Relics were chipped from Sally’s aged headstone,
attesting we were in her shrouded burial zone.
During the night she would come to our room,
retrieve the chip and return to her tomb.

Legend had stated, Sally died a fierce demise,
from a deadly disease that stifled agonizing cries.
Her lover saw her fall from atop steep staircase,
she just turned sixteen; frail body draped in white lace.

When the moon was full and close to midnight,
she would float above her grave and then fade from sight.
We ran for our lives through a headstone maze,
to satisfy the oddity of a teenager’s craze.

Now her grave and aged tombstone have been moved,
since family did not want visitors they had not approved.
Sally now lies somewhere in a grave undisclosed,
with her legend and memory fully decomposed.

Copyright © 2011 By Caryl S. Muzzey


Details | Rhyme | |

You Went Away

Another summer here alone
why you left me so cold chilled to the bone
it sinks in when i see you in stone

I walk around in a daze
forgetting the look on your face
nothing fills my heart but empty space
i showed you my darkest place

They tell me that i will be okay
but not today
I cry from the last words i heard you say

Living alone in this place
i think of you so i can escape
A place where i used to see you
Happy and breathing

but not anymore...

A place where you died in pain
It was a shame 
that you couldnt be saved

This day i will remember
because its the day that you went away


Details | Narrative | |

The Sixth Floor

Accuse me at will
Tear my insides
Douse the fire
That fuels my pride

I’m still here
Whether you like it or not
Still standing tall
A battle presently being fought

Feeling as if
Friends turned foe
Knowing their thoughts
Their final blow

Execution awaits
There is no hope
Metaphorically feeling
The noose around my throat

Don’t struggle now
Stand strong, stand firm
For my integrity now
Many will learn

Corrupt are the peers
Only seen through their eyes
Accusations of being unfit
For the well earned prize

Satisfaction never arrives
Remaining forever desirous
Plagued with insatiable lust
Engulfed by this greed like virus

Nothing is enough
To satisfy the thirst
A flawless example
Of mankind at its worst

Criminate me at your will
Make me prisoner to time
Tarnish my soul, kill the spirit
You’ve been so kind

Feeling so far away
Oh so out of place
Take my feelings, take my suggestions
Rip the skin from my face

You’ve been so kind
To have put me in this living hell
Everyone in life
I seem to repel

My presence not matter
I am told now
You tell me what I’ve done
Feeling herded like a cow

Times that we live
The times of today
Concern of all
Based on pay

Rip me to shreds
Leave no recognition
Glance at me or stare
In your minds own suspicion

Take my love, shred my arms
Destroy my scarce trust
Pierce my body with daggers
Thrust after thrust

Leave me in ruins
Then let your friends scavenge remains
All is so wrong
Far past insane

A forgotten memory
I am no more
No recollection
The only traces are sores

So I wallow
In this god forsaken cesspool
Made by you, I contemplate
Why mankind desire the power to rule

 
You spit in my face
Symbolically with your lies
Don’t deny it
Its in your eyes

A disgrace, and an embarrassment
Sheer revolt is felt 
By your presence
Your not even worth a blow of the belt

May your rot
Rot in hell
For I am a shadow
Can nobody tell?


Details | Lyric | |

Waking Up In a Dream

Caged out inside herself The dark light will never shine Why do you care to think negative If you'd care to think at all? Can you believe I wanted to be you? The dream faded long ago Once I realized it was me whom was right; prudence redeemed Your thoughts were wrong Why would you ever try someone that is less than you Someone that could never contend Directly to the end? My ashes turn dark Suffering from the sins of others No melody can save me I'm crossing the borderline Waking up in a dream Is it justified To harm others Only to break your insecurities To fill your prejudice I wish I could know Why you do this The words freeze when the come to me To burn another was they set into you Relapsed again I was left bleeding Cause I'm not good enough if I can be me You were the dream; I was the nightmare Serendipity came for me And I woke up in a dream My ashes turn dark Suffering from the sins of others No melody can save me I'm crossing the borderline Waking up in a dream My ashes turn dark Suffering from the sins of others No melody can save me I'm crossing the borderline Waking up in a dream Say oh, I must say, to you, Mon plus Cher ami Yes to you I'm sorry I had an opinion I'm sorry I felt for one who can't feel I'm sorry I wasn't you I'm sorry I can only be me I'm sorry your dread words will never again be heard by me My ashes turn dark Suffering from the sins of others No melody can save me I'm crossing the borderline Waking up in a dream My ashes turn dark Suffering from the sins of others No melody can save me I'm crossing the borderline Waking up in a dream


Details | I do not know? | |

Nothing to Fear

End it now
End it here
When life is done
I've nothing to fear


Details | Lyric | |

My Darkest Place

Covered with ashes
No way to see through the smoke and fog
The ground is hard and the grass is blackened
There are no buildings
No air among us
No blue skies to heal the pain
No light to see your path
The flowers scattered like clouds
There is no living thing around
You you have defend for yourself
The only time you can visit is in your sleep
The land is cold
The river is filled with blood
The sea is filled with tears
The area is surronded by broken trees and flames
To much of your liking you find a cabin
The cabin is filled with skulls and bones
You step in cracking the bones as you take a step
The door closes as you find yourself in a different place
The room takes you to a hot place
Filled with scary things as you only see in your dreams
Only this is no longer a dream this is reality
This has become your life


Details | Rhyme | |

A Road to Nowhere

A road to nowhere A picturesque scene of trees turning bare Fresh autumn scents filling the air And a young woman on a journey traveling from here to there With a slow, steady pace and tapping shoes She creates an east rhythm to hum along to Walking along, not a care in the world Living her life, and living it well The cool crisp air softly blowing at her knees Coming throughout the autumn trees For a moment it almost seems Things aren't really ever as bad as they tend to seem Soaking in the last bit of light with a peaceful flow She passes along the last few trees with golden leaves shinning abode The now setting sun begins to give off a warm orangey red glow Setting off her long blonde hair as it moves to and fro Then out of the gleaming sky Fighting her rising fear from deep with inside Her heartbeat quickens, as she tries keeping a steady stride Hairs prickling up upon her neck, a raven screeches as it swoops by The absence oh heat, so abrupt Leaves her with chills, so corrupt Touching her soul as if almost freezing up Upon her face lay a perfect cut A gush of wind cuts across her chest And her forehead quickly covers with little beads of sweat Just as she's starting to fear she can't go on She twirls and turns then starts to run She whirls around but falls to her knees Blood slowly dripping down from her cheek The raven appears with an open beak Ans lets out a bloodcurdling screech "Raven, Raven, oh please don't die!" She laughs And looks upon the bird with a menacing smile Then lets out a satisfying sigh "Just please don't die" She gracefully stands with blood-lust filled eyes Her tapping shoes carrying her off into the night Her Raven black hair rocking to and fro And off down the road to nowhere she goes
Inspired by The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe


Details | Free verse | |

Dead

Love Is Dead
Hope Is Dead
Trust Is dead
Death is dead
Privacy is Dead
Liberty is Dead
God is Dead
Nietzsche is Dead
I'm Dead
You're Dead
He's Dead
She's Dead
We're dead
Don't you want to be Dead too?


Details | Quatrain | |

Party Pills

My heart begins to fail, 
My feet race along the ground, 
My body is drenched in a chilled sweat, 
I scream but don't make a sound, 

I feel my body tremble, 
As I frantically try to run, 
I can hear him coming closer, 
I hope he doesn't have a gun, 

There's a warmth on my shoulder now, 
I can feel his quickened breath, 
His rough hand connects with my arm, 
I can feel the shadows of death, 

All of the light has disappeared, 
More darkness has taken its place, 
My body's limp, worn out and weak, 
Death has finally won this race, 

But my soul lives on in heaven, 
To bring justice to those who kill, 
Vulnerable teenagers like me, 
By selling them party pills, 

I got given those party pills, 
To try with a special friend, 
Being a fool, I took a few, 
But death caught me in the end.

Copyright Kayla Yovich 2007


Details | Narrative | |

Too Late

She sits in a corner,
feeling unwanted, alone.
Her friends and family deserted her,
they've been silent for weeks.
Where are they?
No one to talk to,
she clutches her pills,
and stares at the water that's been there for hours.

She thinks.

It's her birthday today,
but nobody called.
Today, yesterday, or before.
She pines for the phone to ring,
but knows it won't.
None of her friends are home, or family.
They must be out together
 - without her.

She swallows and listens
to her shallow breathing cease.
The phone rings.

She'll never hear them say,
"Surprise".


Details | Free verse | |

Kill Me

That's all I want
To die
To suffer
I want to know what it feels like
To know how all those I love, suffer
To know how much it hurts
Kill me

That's all I ask
Kill me slowly, and painfully
Revealing how much pain I can be in
Kill me are the two words
The words that linger on my lips
Kill me now
Or I will do it myself


Details | I do not know? | |

Remembering Him

I can’t pay attention,
They have deprived me of my perception.
My nose hurts, my eyes are sore and my frown is painful.
In a room of people who never knew him.
So sadly only I’ve seen him in eighth grade.
I was the M.C. at his graduation.
He ran up to the mic. He thanked for the award.
“Thank you”, he said.
Everyday in my mixed grade class,
He would sometimes make everyone laugh.
I wasn’t close to him, but knew enough
From seeing him and his crew everyday.


Details | I do not know? | |

A reason not to cheat on someone that cuts

in the rain under stars that dont shine
in the storm, alone i wait
i'll wait for you forever...
and i did
i died long ago
dont you rember?

the blood seemed to pour like rain
the pain i was suposed to feel never came
and you were ashamed
you screamed at me
wanting me to know what i did

but it was your own will if you rember
the night you pulled me onto your bed
and told me 'it was over, it's not you, its me
i've fell in love with another instead'

i cried forever for you
as i whatched you move on with your life
but i couldnt take it all
the blade was a welcome
it screamed at me 'i cant end all your strife'

now your crying by my side
and i just want you to know
i died the day you left me
the day i was forced to let you go


Details | Classicism | |

Me No More

When will this stop, how much longer do I have to take all your bull,
It seems like everything I do is not good enough for you.

I'm tiered of falling asleep at night covered in my own tears,
I'm tiered of being your doormat, your one and only that you take out all your anger. 

When will all this stop? I am running out of words to make it all better. 
Only if you can feel what I feel. You would die already if you walked through what I walked through. 

I'm not giving up cause that's just who I am. I'll fight, unlike you give up and throw it all away.
So I'm fighting now, and there ain't *****you can do to stop me. 

The beast is released, get ready for a nightmare you only dreamt of.
You won't see me the same ever again. 

I'm dead to you, you can't call means tour own anymore. 
If someone will ask me if I no you, I'll deny it with a passion.


Details | Ballad | |

Rosaline

Moonlight shines down on my cold, pale face I am alone, her raven calling, I am disgrace Falling as the willows weep, I hold her in my arms as she struggles to breathe Rosaline, my one love divine. You are sacred You are mine Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline. Happened that Grim reckless day when the shadows began to play Beauty detonated in my trust No more, no more will there ever be a witch so grand, as to bring back my Beloved Rosaline Sorrow cuts it's way into my heart It is the locked key, the one you keep Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline So leaving this Tragic scene I vanished from Rosaline's sight Nevermore will there ever be a witch so grand, as to bring back my Beloved Rosaline Her voice rising above the water Beautiful Rosaline sang silently to me The whispers trailing off her fingers, as she faded into the darkness My beautiful angel has vanished again Goodbye my Beautiful Rosaline. Enchanting she sang to me, in the everlasting light of peace My beautiful siren walks again Goodnight my Beautiful Rosaline


Details | Free verse | |

Yesterday

A young girl sobs for all she's lost.
She's not who she used to be.
The blade is her release.
Her heart shattered to pieces. 
She wonders why me?
She hesitates.  
Her fears overpower her,
pulling her further from humanity. 
Her tears flow. 
She cuts deep.
She's hopeless, she's already given up.
Darkness once her best friend, 
has become her greatest enemy. 
Crimson flows.
She's done. 
She's lost her way, 
traveled to far and can't find her way out. 
She's doomed. 
She's.... going to be Yesterdays news.


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

The day I die

The day I die I’ll be free
Free from pain
Free from hate
Free from a broken heart

The day I die I’ll find peace
Peace from my mind
Peace from my soul
Peace from emotions

The day I die I’ll find answers
Answers of life
Answers of death
Answers of pain

The day I die I will laugh
Laugh at my mistakes
Laugh at my falls
Laugh at myself

The day I die I’ll remember
Remember my family
Remember my first love
Remember my friends


Details | I do not know? | |

Five pulls until the end

                  I dont like life anymore,
                   cause im always sore.
                   Im gonna commit suicide,
                  and your just along for the ride.

                 Were playing russian roulette,
                   i take the gun and stick it to my head,
                   i snap the trigger three times,
                   and i still hear wind chimes.

                 Im not dead yet,
                  but theres still another round of roulette.

                I get the gun again,
                  maybe this will be the end.

                I pull the trigger twice this time,
                  i no longer hear wind chimes....


Details | Free verse | |

A Schizophrenic Poem

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm a schizophrenic
And so am I

I hear voices,
They tell me what to do.
Sometimes I listen,
But they want me to kill you.

I don't want to do it,
It wouldn't be fun.
So listen to me
As I suggest you run.

Run so I can't follow
So these voices won't make me take your life.
Run far away
So I don't have to use this knife.

I also have Multiple Personality Disorder
One part of me doesn't want to kill you
But the other part of me does.
I want to slit your throat and watch you bleed.
I will eat your dead corpse
And feed your bones to the pigs
And crush your skull to give to the field mice.


Details | Free verse | |

Just One Drink

What did she say when you told her you still loved me?

Did she turn away or try to disagree

Did you think about her or how she would be?

No you were only thinking about me.

 

She stands there now, all alone

Facing her fears of the unknown

Turning her head on what she's once known

Realizing now, she's on her own

 

With no one around to help her choose

She stands her ground, not ready to lose

Her head held high while hearing the news

To accept her fate, she must refuse

 

She tries and tires with all her might

To win you back every night

She has no plans to give up the fight

Any hope is out of sight

 

Her heart is now filled with hatred 

Will all the love that you desecrated

With just that one sentence that you stated

Her entire life is now dated

 

Did you ever stop and try to think,

Just how far she would sink?

How close she was to the brink?

Or how it could all end with just one drink?

 

Just one drink to end all the pain

Just one little sip to break the chain

Just one to do the job, to her disdain

Just one and she will die in vain. 

 

You don't even care to attend her funeral

To you she was just a girl that you could treat cruel

How could you be such a fool?

You don't even know of the fire you've fueled. 

 

You come to my door and ring the bell

You send thousands of messages to my cell

Repeatedly the words "I LOVE YOU" you yell

But for all I care you can just go right on to hell 

 

I don't want you anymore you Silly boy

I am no longer your stupid little toy

As for the loneliness you feel now, I hope you enjoy

Because you had your chance and my love you destroyed. 

 

I am my own person without you

I no longer rely on your every move

I am no longer clueless on what to do

I know now I can move on to someone new.

 

As for the girl that you threw aside

I hope you think of her every time you cry

You're the whole reason that she died

If you wanted someone to love, she would have been there by your side. 

 

She would have loved you the way you love me

But you never opened your eyes and seen what there was to see

I'll never love you no matter how hard you plea

So wallow in your self pity, you'll get no remorse from me

 

I hope you drown in your misery

Thank God that sad little girl is finally free

Thank God I knew it was time to flee 

This is goodbye, so don't bother calling me.


Details | Free verse | |

The Beast

Anger.
Cutting, biting, shaking.
Anger.
Itchy, burning, ripping, tearing.
Anger.
Burning, searing, blaring.
All I want to do is scream.
Walk away, walk away.
Live or die another day.
Walk away, breathe deep.
Watch everything you say.
The blade falls deep
Cutting down as I weep.
I hold my breath and take a step
Trying to walk away.
But a monster surges again
And I’m right back where I started again.
Anger.
Twisted, surging to swallow me whole.
As your face
I rip away with every blow.
Until your blood
Covers my face. 
Your existence
I’ll erase.
And I cry here when I’m done
This pitiful thing I’ve done.
Monster within
Lurking just under my skin.
Monster,
Killer, psychotic, other side.
Monster,
This monster, the one I hide.
Anger,
Always anger.
A scar,
A monster within.
This terror-fed,
Blood-thirsty beast lurking just under my skin.


Details | Bio | |

The Color Red

At the beginning it was all so great,
but now i am walking away from this state.
I loved ever moment that we spent together,
I thought we would go on like that forever. 

But i am sorry to say that you have torn my heart apart,
I was praying on my hands and knees from the start.
Praying so that this would not happen,
but it happened and it ain't stopping. 

I beet my self in the chest now for letting this go so far,
I wish i could just forget this all to remove this scar.
The scar that you left on my soul is way too deep,
everything poring out of it is nasty and smells so creep. 

I know that people say to "Forgive and Forget",
but i can do only one thing, and its pore it out without a fit.
So i am done with this hell people call life,
i am on the edge of this earth waiting to survive. 


Dedicated to the one that broke my heart. 
No names will be spoken.


Details | Rhyme | |

Complex Rhyming Scheme

When I hear a sentence, I hear a lyric
Trying to write these rhymes? Is drivin my crazy
My mind will seem so complex when you hear it
All the confusion tho, Is makin my mind hazy
Least im writin rhymes, You just bein lazy
All this hate, Is makin people show aggression
Everyday people gettin shot, Facin depression
That person? Still showin in the back of their mind
Can't move on, Can't leave them behind
One of the worst things we face is suicide
Committing self murder is how 5 of my friends died
All so loved, All so kind,
I dont understand how you could leave
Me in this unstable state of mind
All these people none can beheave
Only if we could get our world out this hateful bind


Details | Ballad | |

Miss Mayhem

Nymphomania Is all she can grant you along with a well spent night This femme fatale isn't something A man can't handle A sex-fiend straight from the chamber of Satan A desire so strong It won't ever feel wrong A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem Disaster is what she is A taste of her could make you leave All other vices and loves Would you ever think of the price For an eternity you'll be condemne dEven just for one night with miss mayhem This vamp of pain all life she will drain, this is addicting whore Is all you will adore Exciting and erotic Using all fetishes against your soul Your wife will surely lament From this dreadful strife A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem A plague of pleasure The flead rats couldn't even measure Against the scourge of men A mistress of melancholy She took over my soul The amphetamine addiction Of her deadly embrace Her sweet poisonous grace Her heroin laced lips Oh how her venom drips All beware of a sensual destruction The comely fatal femme This sexual gem Stay away from miss mayhem


Details | Rhyme | |

Light

There is a light
Through deaths gate
It is in sight
Accept your Fate!


Details | Rhyme | |

Fate

Fate, the Goddesses,
Spin their string
With just one snip
True suffering

But if the Goddesses
Do not snip
Then your life is hell
In every bit

The Fate
The Darkness
The ones who hold life
The Fate 
Who can deny
These show us their love
to go set us free
With just one cut
Im done with thee!!


Details | Epic | |

About Kameron by Taylor

I stood in the room staring at that hard wooden floor.

Thought of him and then closed the door.
I looked back up and everything was black.
Suddenly I knew the pain was back.

But he loved me.
I knew that much.

Black and gray rags were scattered everywhere,
And all I could do was stare.

But he loved me .
I knew that much.

I sat on his bed and noticed that the tears started to shed.
Then I saw a very dark closet.
I heard our song and wanted to pause it.
I felt my heart slowing with the rhythm.

But he loved me.
I knew that much.

Light began to shine through the enormous window.
I looked over,
And there...was a shadow.
The giant black drapes turned blue.
I thought to myself:"This can't be true."

Because I knew he loved me.

The roses came back to life.
And the bed turned white.
The rags turned into his clothing.

The music slowed and I didn't know what I was being shown.
But I loved him.
A light came from the closet.

A light that was brighter than any of the stars in the sky.
I saw a figure,and again,I started to cry.
I saw his face,saw his smile,
And knew that this was our special place.
And he said I love you.

Those three words meant the world to me and him .
And I said,
...I love you a whole lot more.


Details | I do not know? | |

Deathwish

I refuse to sleep
And prefer to cry,
Yet I wish to rest forever.
The truth is
On some days
I cannot keep myself together.

Tears falling from my eyes
Silently drowning me
Throughout my mind...
My soul's tomorrow
Is full of sorrow.

Hidden depressions
Deeper than the seas.
Waves have thrown me
Into a cave of loneliness and regret,
Leaving me with only a wish of death.


Details | Rhyme | |

Deing

Self loathing, frustration, and a painful sad
With a mind trying to keep itself glad
Armor torn and ripped, dragged across the ground
Jagged wounds slowing down the hearts pound

The knight fought knowing inevitable loss
But with hope in his breast, he fought and he fought
Cuts and slashes in every battle
A gladiator forced into war for survival

He starts falling and his eyes begin to mist
Tears trailing eyes, dispersing in the air
Failing and falling, unavoidable despair
Disappearing into a dark and deep abyss


Details | Rhyme | |

Cross

Christians Marching
Swords on high
Bringing nothing
but screams and lies!

Blood of children
Fall from them.
People frightend
when they decend.

Christians Marching
Swords on high
With the cross
with screams and lies!

Wonders fall
People die
Screaming calls
up to the sky

Christians Marching
Swords on high
With the cross
with screams and lies!


Details | Rhyme | |

Worthless

I'm not like everyone else Hence why I'm cast away My religion made them hate me Plus the fact that I'm gay. They changed the very cloths I wear And try and make me fall They went and changed my hair Oh just damn it all They took my kingdom and my crown For their fear of me The constantly speak and put me down For they could never see I am worthless, I have no love I am worthless, never heard my screaming call I am worthless, like the dove I am worthless, just damn it all Slim my wrist, hear me now? Death's the freedom, never pointless All of you, disgraceful cow You've always known that I am Worthless!


Details | Verse | |

Bonds

I was raised      in a prison of darkness
along walls of cement      have I groped
the hearts here      deep scarred and callous
no dreams of a child       had I hoped
 
Starved             for affection and famished
though surrounded by people           alone
sixty four rooms       I could roam in
but that place               was never a home
 
Just one more workhouse            to live in
my duties                   to serve and to clean
no pay                 for the labor was given
I was here to work         and be not seen
 
I could go days            with seeing no parents
went to school        and to work            and to bed
my breakfast                 was in my room coffee
the feral cat           entertained in the shed
 
This building                   has so many toilets
even the master                   one I must clean
I drop like a stone             in my bed at night
I sleep so deeply      to dead to dream
 
Though I live now this place            with my father
it's no different             than with strangers I slept
they too              used me like a work horse
their houses the places               I kept
 
Somewhere was lost to me             childhood
not a human            soul I could trust
I do not know love              it is fiction
as into this life        I was thrust
 
There were times       I wished mother successful
where in the peace            of death I would sleep
the pain of knowing                       I'm unwanted
was to much        for this child to keep
 
I suppose it's                this very reason
I recognize             the true face of Love
the nigh hundred people               I lived with
qualify not of that place         to be of
 
I've been exposed to violence              on children
and all their secrets           I can confide
recognize the damage                it does you
and those who these secrets           do hide
 
It is easy to remain lost here
where no true tracks            be seen on your road
where life             has not direction or guidance
and one is broken           by the weight of its load
 
But there are so many rooms           in this prison
and each every one          has its own trap
the master of death                 who has forged them
place these obstacles     in every path
 
So while your searching           for life and its answers
the only one worthy            to steadfastly teach
should exist       every day in your dealings
and your connections             from greatest to least
 
I'll not care about          the labor I give you
as long as love            my load is light
we will share         in living together
in our unity       we can delight
 
I learned               to take care of your body
but it takes two            for the care of the soul
I could live alone here             without you
but it's the sharing         that makes us whole...
 

COPYRIGHT © 2012 C. Michael Miller
via Duboff Law Group LLC


Details | I do not know? | |

Must I Forgive?

Why did you do it?
I'll ask you again,
You had so much to live for,
And you were my friend.

You said you were here,
Whenever I needed you,
But you're not, and won't be,
Now who will I turn to?

I think of the sparkle
That lit up your eyes,
Was greater than any
I'd seen in the skies.

I knew that one day
You'd set a girl free,
But we'll never know now
If that girl should've been me.

I might learn to love,
But never forgive,
Because you, my dear friend,
You should have lived.


Details | Lyric | |

Louder Than Thunder

All stars could be brighter
All hearts could be warmer
If i could find a place in your heart

youve written a sad song 
the one i found 
you were laying on the floor 
holding it close to your heart

I dont think i deserved this
My heart turned into ice
Melted at the sight of your pictures

I held your hand 
while you were sleeping in your casket
I kissed your cheek
While people passed your viewing

Youve written a sad song
the one i found
you were laying on the floor
Holding it close to your heart

What would it take for things to be quiet?
passing the sound of your voice
While laying on the bed we once slept in 
Holding eachother for warmth

youve written the saddest song
No one can recover
Our last memory of you
Laying helpless on the floor

I could have done better
Finding my way into your heart





Details | Free verse | |

Desperation takes control

She's locked in silence and fear, behind that cold glass wall. She tries with all her might to not give into her darkest temptations. And grab that stealy cold blade, and watch as her blood comes pouring out. She lays in desperation waiting... For nothing. For everything. Her desperation takes over, begins to control her. She cries out in anguish. Let's it all flow out. Tears, Blood, Love, Family, Her Life. It all comes out in one swift motion of her best friend. Her razor blade. She closes her eyes and clenches her teath. Wishes it would all go away, but she knows there's not such thing. Grew up wanting to die, it was so hard. Wishing she could be normal like everyone else. All she wanted is not to be locked in a box full of emotions. Blood flows down her arm and all she hears is her silent sobs. Watches her life pass infront of her. She fades in and out. Laying in her pool of desperate, worthless blood. One more breath, those last words. I love you mom and dad.


Details | Free verse | |

Imperfection's Beauty

A world only meant for perfection
Sophie can Hardly Breathe
Have you ever thought about Imperfection's Beauty?
Don't Look to the east, stay here with me

We are The Sick
We Are The Chosen
Just to see--Just to be
Imperfection's beauty 


Details | Couplet | |

Curled Up

Her skin white, drained
Her expression dark, pained
Eyes staring out, completely blank
Hair lifeless, dank
Her fingers curled, still
In her mouth, a cyanide pill


Details | Acrostic | |

Traumatic

Teenagers not taking
Responsibility
And causing
Utter
Madness, sadness
And 
Trauma while
Intoxicated.
CRASH!


Details | Elegy | |

Marie III--Is the Coffin Too Deep

So frigid was her immaculate body Her last second in screams is all I can see Love's revenge was my guilt With you I'd rather let you die with Bound hands Without you, Marie, like the psychopath's dream Death is all that I can see; All that could redeem Did anyone ask Did anyone recall The sweet taste of the poison The swift slash of the knife he penetration of the lead The pain of her decaying heart I can hear it's bellowing cries But why can't you, Marie, Hear my paranoid eulogies Is the coffin too deep? Was it so hard to solve Was it so hard to see That I strangled her so easily My nails piercing her comely skin Blood dripping like the pomegranate I crushed with the shovel I shattered her shins The knife to slight her wrists Didn't you see I did it all The only witness Couldn't say Is the coffin too deep? The pain of her decaying hear tI can hear it's bellowing cries But why can't you, Marie, Hear my paranoid eulogies Is the coffin too deep? Marie I cant stay Earth is to cruel when your coffin is to deep Forever in death and in death alone The pain of her decaying heart I can hear it's bellowing cries But why can't you, Marie, Hear my paranoid eulogies Is the coffin too deep?


Details | I do not know? | |

Free

I can't hear
I can't see
My body is gone
But my soul is free


Details | Rhyme | |

Despair

For once I want the sun, but I'm denied it,
Don't need to keep the rain out; I provide it,

I know that people think I'm too compliant,
The real trouble is, I'm too reliant,

Simply can't stand this isolation,
No-one else is struggling in this situation,

They're all bowled over by their first freedom,
No longer have the time to see that I need them,

Even when I'm home, the tears keep streaming,
All through the day and again when I'm dreaming,

I cannot eat, yet I'm getting bigger,
Food is my weapon and life is the trigger,

But always, it's only my tears that I'm tasting,
Six months and a grand's worth of therapy I'm wasting,

Supposedly my chance to turn my life 'round,
I shun it and grind my face into the ground,

So sick of all these plastic smiles and pretences,
Still wishing that car crash had had different consequences,

Still kicking myself for my cowardice and doubt,
Mere scratches, not deep enough to get me out,

I've been ready for years now to tell you goodbye,
So how many times do I have to die?

I'll leave it 'til Christmas, see how I've contended,
Although it feels my life has already ended.


Details | I do not know? | |

Departure

  This hurts to much i start to cry my life seems so help less 
you cant even imagine what i have been through i cry almost every 
every night my heart achs so much just take the knife and cut my 
wrists make the pain all go away.

   you dont understand i was raped once and it hurt like hell i had
no support once so ever and i was used twice just please i ask you 
take that knife and take my life i cant bear to see another day.


it hurts like hell telling you the truth i cant belive that i am still 
here but the only reason i stick around is cause i found my one true love 
that makes my heart fell all better again, he loves me so much he would 
kill for me i dont understand i love him so much but some reason i always 
end up hurting him in away thati thought was not possible.


Details | Lyric | |

Die With Passion

You need to come find me.
This, this game is done can't you see?
I can not hide from you any more.
I want to watch you suffer, suffer more.

This game is getting so old.
My heart has become so cold 
I do not love you any more.
I’m frozen to my core.

I don’t love you any more
Listen to me roar,
I hate you passionetly.
You’ve set my anger free.

I don’t even really care
If you’re no longer there
Lord you made me cry
I wish you would just die
‘Cause I don’t love you anymore

Come on out stop hiding
As you can see you’re not my King
Come on out and play
Today’s your dying day

I don’t love you anymore
My heart is what you tore
Lord you killed me
You ignored my dying plea.

I will never even care
If you’re no longer breathing air
I’ll be glad when you die
And you want to know why? 
‘Cause I don’t love you anymore

(now go) You are going to die 
(you) Didn’t even care that I
(go) Was used like trash, blown away
(die) It’s your time to pay

I don’t love you anymore
All the suffering that I bore
Your soul is coming with me
To Hell we’re going to flee

I don’t even really care
That you’re dead, I’m well aware
The time has come for this goodbye
To Hell will your soul fly
‘Cause I don’t love you anymore


Details | I do not know? | |

R.I.P

The feeling that i get inside... THe tears that come to my eyes.... When i hear that someone 
has died... Words cat explain... Thats how much pain... Is tearing me apart.... Killing my 
heart... Another soul gone... oNe more missing from home.... Family is lost... Wonder whats 
will it cost... To get you back... They dont want to face the facts... Your flying with wings... 
Angels sing... As you enter the gates... You dont have to worry about the fakes... Worry 
about the Jeffin... Cause now you sitting in heaven... We look up to you now... And we all 
smile... Saying we love you... Miss you... And sorry for the hurt we put in ya life... And 
happy you was put in our lifes.... (R.I.P to my friend ANTHONY)


Details | Free verse | |

One

One cut,
One blade,
One bloody line,
One sad girl,
One lie, 
One to many lies, 
One fake smile,
One tears falls,
One less days,
One day I will die, soon
One will miss me,
One rose on my grave,
One more reason to believe Im useless,
One more lie to my face,
One scar,
One love, now hate
One girl
One lonely girl,
One secert,
One dead girl,
One missunderstood


Details | Chastushka | |

Murder & Love

Sorry cant take back destruction
Sorry can't take back the lies
Sorry cant take the knife out your heart
I murder your feelings and what we started 
Guilt is what I feel when I look in your eyes
After all the lies, rumors,stories you still love me
My crime makes me look at myself different
I don't know can I be the same person 
you were the victim and I'm the killer
Evertime I have sometime good I destroy it 
I murder your trust,love,passion for me
It's killing me more inside
It's making me want to take my own life 
because I destroyed someone's else.


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

Fantasy

I want the world to burn,
I want to disappear.
I want to stop the pain I feel, 
I don’t want to be here.
I feel overwhelmed,
And wish to die.
Just to feel a simple emotion,
When I cannot cry.
I dream of ending my suffering,
Of slicing through every vein.
But each time I try to escape,
My efforts are in vain.
I dream of emptiness,
Because I cannot feel the joy.
I dream,
But feel no release.
I live a life I destroy.
And each time I cut,
I come closer to what I fear.
I wonder what would happen,
If I let go and lie here.
I’ve often thought of dying,
So much better than crying.
I dream of it,
Like a fantasy.
A dream I want,
But cannot see.
There are so many times I’ve had the chance,
The chance to end it all.
Yet I keep falling,
Falling and failing just to stall.
Maybe I’ll finally make it,
Kill myself and end the call.
Then I’ll find peace and end my endless fall.
But don’t cry for me,
I feel nothing at all.
I’m better off dead,
Than enduring the pain of my brawl.


Details | Free verse | |

Tears of Blood

I remember you once told me never to cry,
That my eyes would dry,
And I shed more tears than I ever had before.
You said that if I wept on your behalf again
You would die,
And they found you on your reddened floor.

No.  You said it was a lie, you wouldn't kill yourself,
Your heart that loved has stopped,
And so has mine.
Your urn sits solely on my shelf,
When will I see you again?
It's only a matter of time.

Time before I go crazy, I think,
I'll go mad then take my life.
I want to write to you more notes,
But the pen is just dripping ink.
I need you now I'm in strife.

I wonder,
Was it my fault you died that night?
I remember you once told me that life was good, not to cry,
That my eyes would dry, and they did.
I guess, like then, you are right.

But then why did you?
Life is not good.  You left.
You made it worthwhile,
To me no one had ever been so true.

You left me without a word of goodbye.
You were my everything, and I was yours.
I am sorry.  No more will I cry,
For now I am on my own reddened floor.


Details | Free verse | |

Fear

Wide eyes
Panic
lips hovering right below a scream
hair pulled into a fist
mouth covered
panicked eyes
wide
heart rattling
fear


Details | Narrative | |

My Generation

On a crisp blue morning
Like any other day
Abruptly evolving
Into a horrific display

Few words describe
This event of destruction
Automatically you blame
Political corruption

Who else are you to blame
But our elected chief?
In all actuality
Labeled in fictional belief

The cards are all
Now on the table
Justice must be brought
By any means able

Yet now you criticize
Our leader's standing declaration
Whatever happened
To this nation's protection?

Now watched by the world
On satalite television
Explosions and death
In high definition

Now shown to the world
This terror named war
And YOU now ask
"What are we fighting for?"

Freedom and independence
Our inalienable rights
For which often
We still must fight

Jealousy and resentment
Hidden behind religion based hate
Failed to be realized
Is this trajic date?

Enragement short lived,
By our nation as a whole
Crying and complaining
About our soldiers death tole

Fighting for us
They are defending our nation
Yet to be supported
By our ignorant MTV generation

All of your "children"
Signed up for their job
When needed they fight
Now they're purpose you rob

Hide in your burrows
For you should'nt be seen
Spineless is this generation
Lacking the integrity it needs


Details | ABC | |

Fire

A fire in my heart
Blazes brightly- for the entire world to see
Caressing the wind
Dancing on the wood
Effortlessly glowing
Feverishly hot


Details | ABC | |

DEFENDING SOLDIERS OF THE TENDEREST AGE

Throughout the world's history,
we read compelling stories
of the defending soldiers of the tenderest age;
and we can be moved to tears
by the purity of their courage:
they died on the battlefield,
never breaking their promise
or fall short of integrity... 


Defending soldiers of the tenderest age as handsome
as the daffodils of the undulating fields,
nothing scares you when it comes
to protecting your motherland with that freedom: 
as intrepid as the eagles in the open skies...
Defending soldiers as true as warriors,
you push forward with the victorious thought
of becoming nothing more 
than the boldest soldiers:
seeing the smokey sky blast;
rescuing the wounded and closing the eyes
of the fallen ones bleeding on the burned grass...


If I were younger, and I had the same resistance,
I would fight with the indomitable spirit you own;
but my contribution is merely sympathetic words on paper,
which one of you will read on your return
to the homeland when all wait on you united in fond prayer:
with ribbons on trees and flags in their hands....   


Defending soldiers of the tenderest age,
all past heroes had one special trait:
the persistance and will to prevail,
and the final victory on their breath;
when everything else seemed to fail,
an indisputable faith prevented another threat...


Copyright 2008 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Rhyme | |

It's Not A Way Out...

The world is clawing at the window,
If it's unlocked then you've nothing to fear,
Crawl round the corner and catch your breath,
Won't be long before you start to disappear,

It's too late, much too late,
So surrender as they sleep,
Retching as you release it,
And dig it in deep,

Over and over, scrape it all out,
Everywhere's weeping, choke back a cry,
It's too strong to stand and you're slipping away,
Too exhausted to care and too hopeless to try,

There'll be tears tonight,
There'll be more tomorrow,
If only survival
Could be strengthened by sorrow,

Say goodbye, say goodbye,
Leave this sad scarlet mess,
To find out that the next world's
Unbearable at best,

But nothing matters, no nothing at all,
Don't worry about whether it's wrong or it's right,
You'll welcome the silence when you fade away,
For you won't hear the screams when they turn on the light,

No-one can know why and no-one can listen,
Given up hinting for help falling upon futile ears,
Now you'll never explain how you're feeling and so
Your frustration grows as the funeral nears,

Then the flowers will fall over your remains,
Nailed down in a box and patched up with tape,
And so, even after you've been laid to rest,
You'll still be alone with no means of escape.


Details | Lyric | |

Depressed Stream of Consciousness

Want to cut,
Can't.
Want to die,
Can't.
Not can't,
Won't.
Want to but won't.

Why?
They love me.
So what?
I love them.
You suffer...
I know.
Life sucks....
I really, really does...
Who knows,
Maybe death is better...
The dead know.
I bet they do,
They only way is to join them.
But I won't.
I have responsibilities.

"The woods are lovely dark and deep"
Now aren't they...
"But I have promises to keep"
So, so many...
"And miles to go before I sleep"
So many....
"And miles to go before I sleep"
Too many?


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

It Hurts To Hear Your Voice

Never have I heard such a sweet voice. Never have I heard such beautiful words. You never ceased to find a way to amaze my ears, my eyes, and my heart. But now I realize how much more I am missing. You seem to understand my tears but yet you continue to cause them, because when I hear your voice I collapse on the floor, my eyes begin to pour. I lay there thinking of what I lost. You probably would sit there and laugh it off. I feel so wrong. You raped my heart and threw it on the ground. It doesn't matter what time of the day it is, it hurts the same to me. When I see your face I start to cry. Put my head inside my
hands, Try and gain control back again. It has never worked once, but its the only hope I
have. One day you will look back and see what you never saw before. I will still be here
for you. But its when you rip out my heart and suck the love clean then shove it back
inside and forget all about me that I cannot comprehend. I feel my arm reaching for the
gun. Tears run down my face for the last time. I put the bullet in the clip. load the clip in the gun. Cock the pistol back and Whisper "wont this be fun". I put it to my forehead, 
Nothing told me to stop. That night you ripped out my heart
you took my soul with it. I place my finger on the trigger and pull as hard as I can. but before the bullet hits my brain and my life comes to an end, one final thought runs through
my head. "I wish you could love me the way I loved you. I wish I could show you all the things I did for you." But now that's not possible, there's a bullet in my head. I wish I could say I love you just one last time, but it doesn't matter now, for I am already dead...


Details | Free verse | |

You're Gone 1-8-09

you were supposed to stay forever
you were supposed to tell me of the war
you were supposed to come to my wedding
but you won't be...

you left...
I didn't want you to...
but the cancer got you...
and you left...

they should have found it earlier...
but they ran all the wrong tests
and they couldn't find it...
not til it was too late...

so the cancer ate away at you...
it ate and ate and ate...
there was nothing to be done
all there was to be done was to wait...

so we did.
we waited,
and waited,
and waited...

we waited less than a month...
the longest month of my life...
until January 24, 2008, around 3 a.m.
she woke up and found you dead...

and now you're gone...
no matter how bad I want you to be here...
You're Gone...


Details | I do not know? | |

see

The way I see is so unheard of, it gets to me that nobody sees what I see.
This way of thought chose me, As it calls out my name, Some call it insanity or ill.
But I find the way I see is very real.
There is no life after death you see, This is what my sight tells me.
There is no point in shaping your mind, As it will shut door to your perception and the way you think.
See, if you could see the way I see and what I see, you would demand and declare insanity, For what I see isn't seen unless you see the way I see.
The world isn't what it seems, it seems.
The way I see tells me there is no insanity that will cause the death of me, But a broken dream will surely be, This I cannot see because of the way I see, you see.
When life has a strange rhythmic pull on you, you see, then maybe you can see the what I see the way I see it, It seems.
To I, the way I see is but the way I've always seen, But yet you see me strange.
Because the way I see is unheard of...That gets to me.


Details | I do not know? | |

My Angel's Suicide

The light was too bright,
So he hid from the sun, 
In his dark palace.
He held the gun,
Closed his eyes,
And held his breath.
Gripping the gun,
Waiting for death.
He placed his fingers
In perfect position.
The gun well loaded
With ammunition,
Raising the gun
Up to his head.
He ran from life.
Choosing death instead,
And pulled that trigger.
And fired that shot.
Dropping the gun, 
The barrel still hot,
And in that split second,
Before he died,
I swear I saw it,
My angel cried....


Details | Ballad | |

A ballad for Hannah

A ballad for Hannah (In memory)

I awoke this morning with a frightening chill,
Hannah has been killed
By a group of peers,
There was never any violence
Only immaturity from them all.

Day by day was Hell
She always felt like she was locked in a cell,
The rumors grew closer
Minutes got longer,
Death was knocking at the door.

No one noticed her sorrowful eyes
Or even wondered if she wanted to die,
All that mattered to them
Is letting everyone know
That she can not be trusted.

She plotted a devious deed
Who would notice this lead?
Her fall would be quick and painless,
No one would ever suspect it,
Hannah has been killed.


Details | Verse | |

The fun it ends

The windows pane upon my face, 
The door unlocks, I fall from grace. 
My friend he screams, a crunch of steel, 
Stabs of pain, then the blood I feel. 

The car we stole, a ride of joy, 
Treating it like a tonka toy. 
Speeding 'round the Mumbles mile, 
Off our heads for a little while. 

Pass the chippy, towards the pier, 
We hear the sirens, "The cops are near". 
Faster, faster, we approach the bend, 
This so called "joy" is about to end. 

Headlights shine from the road ahead, 
Then when I wake, my mates are dead. 
Broken limbs, a mangled wreck, 
The sense of warmth from my swollen neck. 

I try to move off the cold damp floor, 
My legs and arms I feel no more. 
The scents of fuel, blood and smoke, 
I try to breathe, but can only choke. 

I hear a voice coming close to me, 
I tried to look, but could not see. 
These words I tell about this night, 
From a darkened world, now I have no sight..... 

I was asked to write a piece about the crime of so called "joy riding"


Details | Acrostic | |

Punitive by Cristie Rivera 8th grade

Punished because I was
Underage and drinking.
Not the fault of my friends.
It's my FAULT!
The car crashed
In flames and ended in a 
Very powerful
Explosion!


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Murder of the innocent

Murder of the innocent............. 

One door opens, as another door shuts, 
Drugs, knives, coppers, over dressed sluts. 
Colours worn, weapons in hand, 
Children dying in a blood tainted land. 

No more hatred, no weapons to yield, 
No more coffins in a mud sodden field. 
Hatred now gone, no more youngsters to die, 
No need for anger at the places they lie. 

When the door opens, the door opens wide, 
No more denying, no places to hide. 
No time for distance, no walking away, 
No children dying, no murders today......... 

In memory of the victims of the British culture of knife crime.


Details | Narrative | |

take me from this misery

* this poem has been inspired by Breaking Benjamin's Dear Agony....*
* and was written in memory of my grandmother Jeanne Gula *

My name is Jeanne Gula, today i found out that i have cancer.
Its in a tumor, that's very painful, its very rare, its 3 cancers into 1
they already took it out once... and it came back.
The doctor said it was to late to take it out again.
Its not the perfect end to my life, but its all i can have..
I don't really know how much more time i have.
I used to be able to walk by myself, with out help.
I can't believe this happened to me... of all people.
It's be coming torture, they called in hospices.
This cant be good...
I'm in my own home, slowly dieing...
I really don't want to leave, I will leave so many loved ones behind..
So I think i will stay a little longer...
Its January, i now can't do anything by myself, i have to rely on family to help with
everything, my organs are starting to slowly shut down, its very painful to go through.
but my daughters birthday is coming soon... I'm not going to leave now... i don't want her
to be sad, on such a happy day.
I can't hold on much longer.
I'm now out of this misery, its feb. 2nd, and I'm finally free.
Free, of all this pain, and I'm healthy again, I can walk, with out hanging on to anything
or anyone, I can finally be independent again...
now no one cry for me, because i lived a full long life, and no longer in pain..
I love you all.
Love Grammy


Details | Bio | |

Andy's Game

Born in Fort Hood, Andy’s life wasn’t right
Her momma and daddy would always fight
Daddy was a drunk, momma was abusive
Her goals and dreams were so elusive
One day, Andy couldn’t take it anymore
Left without packing, walked out the door
Got into a pickup with a good lookin’ stranger
She liked the feeling, the feeling of danger

Arkansas was the first stop
She found a place and set up shop
Robbin’ people and banks was her game
All the money she could find she would claim
Took her .45 into the nearest bank
The clerk had noticed and his heart sank

Andy was this gal’s name
Living life fast was her game
Never wanted to be tame
Near the end it would be a shame

Took her money from the bank clerk
Loved what she did, always wanted to work
Got away from the scene in a icey blue truck
Andy used skill, she didn’t need luck

Andy was this gal’s name
Living life fast was her game
Never wanted to be tame
Near the end it would be a shame

Left the state of Arkansas, she’d become wanted
But Andy was made of stone, she was never daunted
Headed to Arizona to stake her claim
Too bad here she would take her first aim
Held up the bank, asked for the money
But this young boy wouldn’t give it, sonny
She shot him dead center between the eyes
Then suddenly she heard the screams and cries

Andy was this gal’s name
Living life fast was her game
Never wanted to be tame
Near the end it would be a shame

She jumped behind the desk and peeped over the top
The cops had come and set up shop
"Come out with your hands up or be shot down!"
"Then come and shoot me." She said with a frown
Stood up and blazed that .45
She had never felt so alive
She took one to the chest
No, two
No, three
She had met her end, she had begun to see
Andy died that day
But before she went, she had somethin’ to say
"To my father and my mother, I never needed you.
Because deep in my heart I always knew
that I’d amount to somethin’, be it good or bad
and that is why I’m dyin’ but I’m glad."

Andy was this gal’s name
Living life fast was her game
Never wanted to be tame
Near the end it would be a shame

(For you, you know who you are)


Details | Free verse | |

The Stars Aren't Out Tonight

The stars aren't out tonight 
And I can't see the light in your eyes
The new moon makes the night too dark 
It's getting harder and harder to find my way
The light fades to even deeper shades of gray
Lips grow colder and breathing gets slower
I can't seem to bring you back to life
Please don't leave me. I'm not strong enough
The pieces you held are still too fragile
Falling to the floor, glistening like new born stars
We share the last breath and my eyes shut tight
A single tear rolls down your cheek
The last time I call you mine
The last time you call me baby
The black attire goes with the parents who bury their children
Red rose falling against the mourning skies
This is the end of a love story that never was


Details | ABC | |

Do you know my abc's?

And it was there. Looking me in the eye, “I shall born you.” I was overcome with 
sadness.

Before I was born I died. I was one with everything. I was more alive then, then I 
am now.

Children seem so simple. Children seem so free. Why is life so hard. Maybe the 
simple one is me.

Deep cuts in my heart. A boy that I love with all of me. I might’ve been invisible 
because he always walked by.

Enough of this! I hate it all. I gathered myself and left my heart behind.

Falling down the tubes. Drifting though life. No friends, no family. I. Can’t. Breath.

Gaining momentum. Losing myself.

Hot under my skin. It’s getting tighter. Wanting to rip through it.

I, am, not, real.

Just between us. Just between us two. I used to be everything.

Killing gives life. I want to give my life to you.

Love exists only as water. My heart is dry.

Maybe I’m your dream. Maybe you are mine. Maybe neither of us carry weight. 
Maybe both of us have died.

No, you never gave me a drop.

O I cry. I cry for you. I cry I cry I cry I cry for you.

Plenty of times I wonder how long my sentence is.

Quiere un vaso de dulce sangre. Dibuja un corazon dentro de mi cuerpo. Con 
esto corazon agujero, bebe mi vida. 

Run away from what you’ve heard. Leave and write your own truths. They say He. 
He does not exist. It tells me so.

Say what’s on my mind? Ultimate indulgences; eating meat and having sex. A 
man is meat. Chocolate is sex. A Chocolate man is the only heaven that will ever 
exist. Next to Him.

Telling you about my life is wasting the time I have to live it. If you’re meant for me 
you’ll just know.

Un knowledged people need to stop giving the gift of life and start giving the gift 
of life.

Very little patience do I have for those with no words. I’ll look for the person who 
stole them from you.

Will you be the one that I can hold  for now? Do you have a sweet heart, do you 
have soft soul?. Will you be the the love  that my ego drinks?

Xoxo hugs and kisses. Hugs and kisses. Let me touch your skin, help me miss 
your soul.

You’re looking inside me. Like it used to.

Zero words writing in my head. Where do my thoughts go? They go on this page. 
This page of my life.


Details | I do not know? | |

A Matter Of Strength

If strength is only 
How well you hide the pain.
I must be truly strong spirited.

If thinking you want death
Is a matter of being gutsy enough,
Then those who're gone
Were even more strong

Rest in peace,
Yet what've they've done 
Shall forever haunt me...


Details | Narrative | |

Mourning by Kenneth Morales 8th grade

At a graveyard, looking down at
the grave. In deep emotional pain.
Hoping that, that one person is in
a better place. Last few weeks
for her have been hell. But everybody
gave her a blessing and 
then she passed away. Now she's 
with God, looking down on me.

Love you grandma.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Girl and her Teddy Bear

The little girl cries, alone in her room, holding her teddy bear as the dread sets and looms. 
Crying and shaking, scared to sleep at night, tired of the struggles, tired of the fight. 
With her mom gone all night, and her dad drunk all day, aching to tell but at what price must she pay?
Needing a friend, someone to tell her secrets, someone to pick up all the broken pieces.
To walk to school with, to complain when boys are yucky, but no one like her could ever be that lucky. 
As the tears fill her eyes, and the snot in her nose, her door opens slowly, and the moment there just froze. 
tiptoeing so quietly, into her room, fear starts to spread swept like a broom. 
He fondle her blankets, stops at her waist, she is kicking and screaming for that shell get a taste. 
The man be becomes when he doesn't get his way, she is bleeding so now she must lay. 
When all is done and finished, she cries on her bed, reliving the nothing that is all left unsaid. 
Closing her eyes, she hears him downstairs, as she squeezes her teddy out flow the tears.
Eying the window perched on the wall, she pictures her life and lets herself fall.


Details | Quatrain | |

Today's Youth

I look out the window, 
Yet nothing is there, 
The darkness surrounds me, 
As i'm frozen in fear, 

Then all of a sudden, 
The night is ablaze, 
Fire and screaming, 
I'm stunned in a daze, 

Communities broken, 
Families torn apart, 
Who could have done this, 
And how did it start, 

They had no real reason, 
To set it alight, 
To cause so much chaos, 
In my town that night, 

My small little school, 
Was burnt to the ground, 
But the very next day, 
There was more to be found, 

Bodies lay broken, 
Ripped apart by a sword, 
This is now what happens, 
When our youth got bored. 

Copyright Kayla Yovich 2006


Details | Rhyme | |

Wise is The Dance Of The Sky

A river of tears poured down her face;
Ocean softly lapping at her toes.
Anxiety built up in her chest,
While the silver dripped down from her nose.

Curls a shade of chocolate milk
Framed her fragile, milk-white face.
The wind rustled through the willow trees,
Her phobia giving quite the chase.

The night was deep, the night was dark,
Her independence hated now.
Their weapons were the cruelly said,
But to the wolves she wouldn't bow.

Her ears a trashcan for their hate.
No light bulb waited at the end,
The tunnel would stay oh so dark.
Hope did not wait around the bend.

And then painted across the midnight sky,
Made her peer up at the night.
A rocket ship? A shooting star!
She wished and found her will to fight.

She grabbed her shoe from off the sand
The other taken by the tide.
She watched the inky purple sky,
Hoping the paintbrush would abide

She saw it coming from afar.
A feather floating in the breeze.
She made a wish, and let it go,
With just a simple whisper, “Please.”

The silver ring that shone so bright,
Guided her to her well-worn path.
She unpacked her suitcase beyond the “swift”.
She feared no mortal's fearless wrath.

Running would never be an answer,
As the Hippopotamus would surely tell.
When someone intrudes your territory,
Defend it, and defend it well.

For though he may seem gentle,
And walk too slow a pace,
The Hippo is one fierce beast,
So she wore him on her necklace.

The darkest is before dawn
The mighty Polar Bear will say
The gold medallion in the sky
Will hide for six months and a day.

Yet he stands on his icy shoal,
Always awaiting the warming rays.
The sun always returns to us.
Yes, that's what the Polar Bear says.


Details | Blank verse | |

Luciferia II-- The Damned

Run away Run Away No matter how Far You will never escape my dark hands of faith Wicked and Damned you are my Sin Darling Don't you Tremble when I embrace you The cold and Dark may fill every marrow But at least there were here For You Tell Me how they So Loved You Tell Me All of your fears When the world is done and all their trust will render Undone I will always be with you And Now We cease to Exist Luciferia I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be Draining into the Night Shivering With the Smallest of Frights I am the Ghost In Your Dreams I watch You Through the Window Yes that is your name Written In Blood Are You Scared? Are You Suffering? The Dark fate is what was Meant to Be This is what happens when you Brake Us with Words Destroy us with sights Twists are minds Set our will On Fire I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be I can see your Misery Just follow me and believe Me We are The Damned Outcasts of this Natural World We are The Damned Hold on I'll show you what you're waiting for We Are The Damned Join Our Dark Reality When you know the choice the Wind Will come right through And you will See what you're really meant to Be


Details | Ballad | |

RESTLESS YOUNG MAN WITHOUT A NAME

He keeps a very low profile,
afraid of the the horrible secret he hides;
hooked on a daily dosage of cocaine...
seeking an instant relief from his acute pain!
His cramped den is the stench
of smoked substance bought on drug-infested streets,
and filth is the undeniable evidence:
one can surely tell that he lives in Hell...
red devilish eyes and sunken cheeks; 
a wasted mind and body meeting their end!   

Restless young man without a name,
wary of the destructible consequences
that stunt your unremorseful conscience;
and what price will you pay and whom will you blame?
Restless young man without a name,
you only existed to fulfill a destiny of shame! 

Day-time is so detestable to him,
more than the viciousest enemy;
night-time changes his personality...  
and he searches for dope down-town,
where the houses are so run-down...
occupied by the crack-heads of East Main!
A limping kid, from nowhere, hands him
a small bag and he exchanges it for some green;
and what started the urge within...
is a deep wound, which can never heal! 

Restless young man without a name, 
intoxicated by the poison that destroys your life and health;
you can't be aware of what distorts your weak senses...
until you are helpless and run out of breath! 
Restless young man without a name,
guiltless and indulgent...you allow death to happily dance!


Details | Free verse | |

Fracta Anima

Maybe instead of life
Maybe I’m the joke.
Maybe I stopped mattering,
So why does this matter?

The shattered pain in my eyes,
Mirrors that reflect only you.
Do you see the cracked smile;
Your laughter is a dagger to my soul.

The frustration is a merry-go-round;
I might fall off and die.
The pain is rotten, a corpse
Twisted all around my heart.

Tears are uncountable, endless
Crying at night but still more.
Oh, the despair in my soul!
I long only for joy, please,
Is that just too much to ask?

Those beautiful dreams are ruined,
Why on earth were they given?
Was it all my fault or maybe
No one’s fault, just life,
The joke that is me.

The cuts will scar, as always
Yet can’t you see them,
Or maybe you refuse to.
The outside cuts are nothing
Compared to my heart, ruined,
Destroyed by far too many hopes.

My trust, shattered like glass
And lying in the wasteland,
My bitter tears are the oasis.

Tired, yet no sleep is found here,
So many questions in my mind,
My heart can’t ask you again.

I’m sorry, oh the mistakes made,
And there will be so many more.

I am hollow, a container of sorrow,
Of lifeless, wingless dreams, so frail.
The hot fire mixes with it,
The anger that is me and my mind,
Questioning, screaming and so unhappy.

Delusions are my safe, happy place;
I only wanted love.


Details | Rhyme | |

Sniffing glue

A teenage boy died after he sniffed glue.
It was a really stupid thing for him to do.
His parents rushed him to the hospital but it was too late.
That poor boy was doomed, it was truly a horrible fate.

His parents said goodbye to him and then he died.
Sniffing glue is idiotic, that can't be denied.
He sniffed it because he wanted to get high.
Don't ever sniff glue or you may also die.

(This is a true story.)


Details | Blank verse | |

The letter

I've fallen today on the war field
with my gun and a picture of you 
these are my final words hear them loud
for i hear the angels singing in the clouds

your my everything,your my world
make sure to kiss our little girls
say goodbye to my mom and hug my dad
and don't forget the wonderful  life we've had

now i hear amazing grace coming closer to me
this note that i am writing is for your eyes to see
i hope someone will give to you this letter for me
because i will pass on today for the land of the free

i see the gates and i am about to go in
so these last few words is all i can do
my breathing is getting harder and its time for me to go
so baby i love you and I'll be watching you, maybe
not in person but in soul, tell our girls their mom loves them so

so whenever you are lonely,i will be there
and tell our little girls to keep up with there prayers
cause i will be listening all the way up here


Details | Lyric | |

She

Shes got bruises on her skin
And sorrow in her mind
Told her fighting back was a sin
Told her you were kind

Lying to her was too fun
She never doubted you
She never even tried to run
She even loved you, too

You took her life and now shes gone
Your signature for her death was signed
How will you feel when you see that dawn
When you have your daughter’s death on your mind

Lying to her was too fun
She never doubted you
She never even tried to run
She even loved you, too

You told your wife you’d hit her
If she said a word
What had happened to what you were
Silence could not have cured

Lying to her was too fun
She never doubted you
She never even tried to run
She even loved you, too

Hit your wife to death
Now shes gone aswell
She took her last breath
While hearing you yell

Lying to her was too fun
She never doubted you
She never even tried to run
She even loved you, too


Details | I do not know? | |

That Light

The feelings that I try to hide,
Inside they eat away at my flesh,
The feelings of pain and isolation, 
From everyone in my past and present

If only I could find that light,
The one at the end of the tunnel,
But I have reached the wrong end,
The end of my life,
Its happening I've replaced the pain with more
And somehow its alright,
Now I feel the release,
I'm falling.
I'm dying, 
I'm letting go.


Details | Classicism | |

lost father and the long lost twin veteran brother

day and night i sit and wonder when is my dad coming home
he writes to me about the war and the things that has happened 
"dear son 
soon I'll be home and i promise you won't recognize me
today i killed at 5 japs and took under my wing a boy not much older than you and 
this makes me wish i was home with you."
one day I'll see my dad and hope that he looks the same 
day after day after day yet no sign that my dad is okay
then one day an army truck appears inside is a man and a young boy right about 
my age.
they knock on my door and i open it 
they told that my dad was dead and the boy in front of me was my twin and he 
was the boy that my father took under his wing .
i gave him a hug and cried for the lost of my father they told that is 15 japs and a 
missile that wiped my father out.
day and night with a new brother by my side i wait to be with my lost father again


Details | I do not know? | |

a walk through my teen pregnancy

i found out the shocking news

i was only 14

but i was pregnant 

three months pregnant at that

people asked how didn't you know you were pregnant

i simply said i was showing no signs

are you scared they would ask

of course I'm scared I'm so young

four months pregnant now

i start having heavy bleeding i get scared and call my mom

she answers

i sob into my phone

mommy i think I'm losing my baby

what, when did you find out you were pregnant

i didn't want to tell you but i found out a month ago 

i go to the hospital

how far along are you

four months can you do anything to help me not lose my baby

the doctor looked at me honey your not losing your baby your just having a period while your pregnant

now five months pregnant

the baby's father and i get into a fight and break up

three weeks later im dating a new guy who wants to help me raise my baby

we are together for two weeks and he goes to florida on a trip

comes back and i find out he cheated on me

i forgive him

he broke up with me two weeks later saying he doesn't think that he can handle being a dad at 17

now six months pregnant

i am scared and alone not sure if even i can handle being a mom

its a common concern since im only 15

the baby is growing healthy

i ponder whether or not to give the baby up

now seven months pregnant

me and the baby's father are back together and engaged

we decide we will keep the baby and move in together

for once we think we have things figured out

now eight months pregnant 

i go to my weekly ultrasound

first week is fine

week two rolls around

i go and have my ultrasound

they tell me my baby is dead his umbilical cord strangled him

the admit me to the hospital

induce my labor

i give birth to a 5lb 2 oz 12inch long still born

he is the most beautiful baby i have ever seen

my boyfriend and i ask ourselves why us

we both are so young me being 15 him being 18

we both blame ourselves

fall into a deep dark depression

both decide life wasn't worth living with out Xavier

our attempt were just that attempt

how ever eight months later we are glad it didn't i am now 16 and married

we are so happy and want to try to have kids in the future

we hope and pray we won't have to goo through that every again


Details | Lyric | |

The Stone

I think i might write a letter
to someone that i havent
talked to in a while
Ill lay it beside her stone
the stone i brought for her
when i was really young
Ill wait until she writes back
Falling asleep on the cold ground
Waking up in the fog


Details | Rhyme | |

Thank you Jacob, Thank you Dana

Too many times I gave into the pain,
Too many times i've forgotten my name.
I dwelled on what was never found,
I've burried my heartaches in the ground.
One day I planned to take my life,
but you guys made my life so bright.
No one knows how much I hurt,
And how much I just hate this world.

Now I show my true colors, 
They're dark and they're depressing.
I'm sorry that it took so long, 
but now i am adressing,
Some of the things inside my head 
arent normal, but theyre real.
My whole entire life it's been
so hard for me to feel.

I do not want you two to think my brain began to rot
But I don't tell you lies when I say deaths a daily thought.
It might seem quite confusing, might leave you in a stump,
But you two were the only ones, begging me not to jump.


Details | Lyric | |

Deteriorate

Cant build a thing
The chains holding me down
Have slowly rotted over time
I need a soul that carries on through the pain (when the walls start collapsing again)
Give me a heart the ceases to fail
Despite the infection within

Dont take for granted this world we live in
Nevermind the fragile dirt we all end in

Time has had its way with me
The trail ive walked down
Has Fastly Deteriorated
I need a soul that carries on through the pain (when the walls start collapsing again)
Give me a heart that ceases to fail
Despite what you will find in me

Dont take for granted this world we live in
Nevermind the fragile dirt we all end in


Details | Lyric | |

The Sixes and Sevens Veil

All of those words and emotions Are tired of lingering in my throat and Mind I want to caress them onto you But how can I? Anon. there might be a time in our days I want to tell you-- I'm worthless, Broken, Diedre, Torned, Discarded, Abuse The past shouldn't control the present but it lingers in my spirit The words need to come out The Darkness with Them What if the truth couldn't set me free, save me from this candled day Underneath the Grove lies something dark, haunted, and confused Hidden in Life aren't we all abused Why can't Eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil I can't discard the decay But I'm still entrouved by the past days why can't eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil Shrouded against our will too scared to show our bare Vulnerable Shadowself It was the ignorance's bliss that caught you The Knowledge creates a burden Too Difficult to Maintain or was it I? trying to be part of your soul The Decay of Your Heart Sadness can be cured by a few words Despair is a disease of the Knife The Eclipse stole the Sun's Sinlight Underneath the Grove lies something dark, haunted, and confused Hidden in Life aren't we all abused Why can't Eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil I can't discard the decay But I'm still entrouved by the past days why can't eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil You can to try to condemn the pain Inside But only I can feel the Decay of my heart I know the quill is better than the razor But only I can feel the Decay of my heart Remember your eyes are hazed by bias lies But only I can feel the Decay of my heart Underneath the Grove lies something dark, haunted, and confused Hidden in Life aren't we all abused Why can't Eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil I can't discard the decay But I'm still entrouved by the past days why can't eyes see what lies beyond The Sixes and Sevens Veil You can to try to condemn the pain Inside But only I can feel the Decay of my heart I know the quill is better than the razor But only I can feel the Decay of my heart Remember your eyes are hazed by bias lies But only I can feel the Decay of my heart


Details | Ballad | |

Vibeke

She is so sweet to me Her lovely lullabies are my fix An angel on earth she is With her voice she could break the lunar love She is my muse But where did she go My angelic-gothic queen A siren has fell What is left to take her place A wench from the south Such a terrible fate for her band of legends  Tristania has surely died


Details | Free verse | |

Dignity

Some have the dignity
To admit that all they have
Is mortality

Others only show
Their corruption
Through drugs

Yet all are the same
In the way
That they
Are ecstatic
Because they have just
Enough endurance to get through
Life

Some cut to find
Harmony but only become
Mindless drifting souls
Slowly dying and turning 
Into the forgotten

Others drown themselves
In the notes and melodies
Of music to find peace
But are only criticized
And put down

Yet all are the same
In the way
That they
Change to find
A sense of comfort
WIthin themselves

Some turn to waves
To drown out the shame
And save their virginity
To escape conflict

Others fly kites
Over rainbows thinking
It will keep people from finding
The hate and fear inside

Yet all are the same
In the way 
That they
Have anger and depression
Deep within their soul

Those who chose
Not to accept this way
Of life followed
The evil and decided on death

For some death is suicide

For others it's drugs and alcohol

But it's all the same 
As it's all about a decision
Of feelings and desperation
Of the heart


Details | Lyric | |

Voices

i hear the voices in my head
they surrond my wooden bed
telling me i should be dead

I try to move but i cannot awake
the forces drive me into a foggy state
suddonly i feel so much hate

I finally got the courage to get up
I walk to the doorway 
I fall to the floor

I have no feet
they have taken them
I used my feet for running
i used my feet for going unto the path 
i shouldnt have stepped on

I look to find my arms
but i dont have any
I used my arms for picking up things
i used them for putting things into my mouth
That i shouldnt have eaten

i feel for my lips 
But they are gone
I used them to say things i shouldnt have said

I cannot see
My eyes have gone missing
I used my eyes to see what i
shouldnt have seen

the voice returns to my head
your better off dead
your a fool for what youve done
now you will rot in hell with no one

I float in mid air
everything turns dark
everything is smothered in fire
i cannot breath
my soul leaves my body and flies up to heaven
it is used to be given to a new baby being born on earth

the man in the fire tells me
that when bad spirits go to hell
they get reused but outs bodys stay here
in this bottomless pit
they are only reused to have another chance

when good souls go to heaven
they stay up there with god 
starting a new life
and ending an old one


Details | ABC | |

perish

I'm hurt screaming and pulling my hair out
Sicken by the drought
Tears of fire
boiling as my blood turns to lava
Preying to Jesus cause only he knows what I'll do
Ran with the wrong crew
If only knew
It'll take a piece of me  with it
A block of my saneness with it
My livelihood has been invaded
My glory long faded
Gang violence underrated
I lost my friend do to mistaken identity
Because of his color he lost his dignity
No one knows what he meant to me, to us
A band aid ripped from a wound that will be forever busted
Arrested development
Suspended judgement
Caused an innocent life to perish
His life i will forever cherish


Details | Rhyme | |

She Promised Him

As she stands there and takes the blows
He's wondering why that text doesn't show
As she bites her lip to hold back her tears
He waits without any thoughts of fear

She's sent away with a shout of rage
He's oblivious to the turning page
She hears the door slam with a crash
He doesn't expect her next painful lash

Her tears spill and her pain gives hint
He can't see how the razor blade glints
Her mind blocked out, a few painless nicks
He continues through, never getting the kick

She drops the blade and watched the blood drip
He thinks of holding her on his next trip
"I PROMISED HIM!" a cry full of regret
"I wonder how she is?" too simple to forget


Details | I do not know? | |

Too Late

Pay Attention
and you shall see
the light that shines
inside of me.
Look closer
in my eyes
where all emotion
in me lies.
But you were elsewhere
and you were blind.
You never saw
the pain in me climb.
Look at me now
after all the pain.
After all the clues
I gave you, in vain.
And now, see me
as I say goodbye.
It's too late now as I lay here and slowly die.


Myrna Lizzeth Acevedo


Details | Free verse | |

Suicide

It's dark

               and it's scary.

I'm still alive and breathing,

                                                 but just barely.

 

You're sitting by my bed

                                          thinking your dreaming.

You sit there and pray

                                       that I awake from sleeping.

 

You start to cry

                          about the scary thought.

That I might not wake up

                                            and you think it's your fault.

 

I want to wake

                         and tell the truth.

But I can't because the darkness is calm

                                                                          and to smooth.

 

I've got to wake,

                            I've got to tell.

It wasn't your fault

                                and I'm putting you through hell.

 

I was hurt

                 and wanted to die.

I know you didn't mean it,

                                             I know what you said was a lie.

 

We had a fight,

                          a huge war.

The war in which

                              I walked out the door.

 

I want to come back,

                                     imurge from the darkness.

And give you my heart back

                                                 and complete forgiveness.

 

I finally awake

                         and see you there.

You start to cry

                          and kiss my hair.

 

I tell you I love you

                                and I don't want to lose you.

You pull me close

                                and tell me you love me too.

 

I start to cry

                   and cover my head.

With the shirt on your body

                                               while you sit on my bed.

 

My chest hurts,

                         my chest aches.

Probably from the bullet I used

                                                       or the life I tried to take.

 

I love you so much

                                 so I have to say.

Mend my heart again

                                     and I will stay...


Details | I do not know? | |

The Haunting

Once I step into his room
I could smell him everywhere still
Even though he is dead now
I look into his drawer
I found pictures of me and him standing there together
He was the nicest friend of mine
I pray and pray for him to give me a sign or speak through my mind
I never thought that I would lose such a good friend
I know he's up in heaven watching down upon me
As I still look at these pictures
I realize that he is still with me
I can smell him more as I think about him
Where I had cut the lights on in his room
They had became dim
I was getting a little scared
The windows came flying open like the wind outside was out of control
But there was no wind in sight
I put the pictures back into the drawer
I took off towards the door
But it was too late
The door slammed shut
There became butterflies in my gut
Scared to death I was
I couldn't move my legs at all
I heard something coming through the walls 
It was a voice calling out my name
The drawer came open faster than I had blinked
The pictures came flying out of the drawer
Tear began to run down my face
The voice that was calling my name was my best friends voice
He was trying to tell me something but I wouldn't listen to it
I was that scared
Finally I saw something come out of the closet
It was a body
I screamed loud as I could
His throat was cut
Someone had runned upstairs where this had taken place
They had kicked the door opened and rushed to me
They had seen what I've seen
But now I see what he was trying to tell me
This wasn't no accident
He was murdered
So now this case is investigated
I reported of what all was going on in that room
I just told them, that was my friend and I just let his spirit free and now he is free
So now by telling that I am in the mental hospital
They dianognsed me with hallucinations
But to me it was real
I always will remember my friend though.





Details | I do not know? | |

Gone

A hurting soul, a troubled heart.
Her and happiness, no longer together, only drifted apart.
Long nights spent in anger, days spent in pain.
Thoughts of suicide, driving her twisted mind insane.
No one that cares, world full of hate and deciet.
Deadly pressures pushed her to the edge, defeat.
One gun, One purpose, One bullet, One reason.
No one would notice, life would go on, season to season.
The plan took place, a beautiful night, everlasting peace.
Pain for only a few seconds, her breathe quickly to cease.
Cold in her room, late for school, alarm buzzing hard.
Her sister walks in, forever to be emotionally scarred.
Family suffering, from the loss of a so-called "loved one".
Never to be held again, no sights of a setting sun.
Love could have saved her, Helped her to just hang on.
But now it's to late for apologies, for now she is GONE!


Details | Rhyme | |

She's a Runaway

While on patrol Down by the beach A shadow in the water Just out of my reach It's off a young girl About sixteen years old What would have troubled her For her life to fold We report it in And await the coroners van To unscramble this enigma As to why this all began Down at the morgue Through her belongings we look A bracelet we find And her diary book We check on the computer Under the missing persons file This girl so young Still a juvenile We sit and ponder At her watery stray This girl so young She's a runaway We head back to the patrol car For we have sad news to tell How do you tell her parents For inside me it dwells We knock on the door And her mother appears May we please come in As her smile disappears On the beach front tonight A young girl was found In the shallows by the pier I'm so very sorry, she drowned On the way back to the precinct I'm thinking of home Of my own young daughter Pray-fully, she'll never roam A week has passed Since they laid her to rest They said, look after your daughter I sure will mam, I'll do my best http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/loss-4.php


Details | I do not know? | |

nightmares

the taste of air, dry on your tongue,
the sounds of nothing, of songs unsung.
the feeling of ghost bumps, prickling your neck,
the smell of blood, bodies are wrecked.
the view of darkness, the sky and stars
these are what nightmares are.

the smile of a friend, as they realize their fate.
the tears on your face, 'cause you know its to late.
the laugh of a murderer, cocking his gun,
the scream of a kid, as he has his fun.
street lights, abandoned cars,
these are what nightmares are.

the voices plotting inside your head,
the monsters screaming under your bed.
he feeling os someones eyes or your neck,
the scrape of a blade as it puts you to death.
your arms, the regretful scars
these are what nightmares are.


Details | Rhyme | |

How Could You Not Have Died

How could you not have died, my dear?
I've lived at least a thousand lives
Waiting for precious, velvet tears
To soak into this skin of mine

To soak into this skin of mine, 
To seep into these veins i hide,
Waiting for these velvet tears 
To, out of my blind sight, subside

How could you have survived, my dear?
My bones will rot before you find
My only known accomplice, fear,
Has long past seen the broad daylight

It's long past seen the broad daylight,
And stays in touch with you at night,
My only known accomplice, fear, 
Has been exposed to much too bright

How are you still alive, my dear?
You said you'd kill to steal my heart,
The homicidal factor's clear,
My chest in shreds, my bruises dark

This chest's in shreds, these bruises dark,
Your once soft voice, a grueling bark,
Inevitably, this body grows stark,
Signaling this spirit's embark...

The second you tell me, my dear,
How could you not have died?


Details | I do not know? | |

*AN UNEXPECTED GOOD-BYE*

Why is it terrible things
Happen to the ones we love most
The ones who never complain
Who never brag or boast

A day prepared too soon
A good-bye unexpected to say
He's in all of our thoughts
And in every prayer we pray

Some may question why
And long for words unsaid
But he's gone somewhere special
Walking on ground we've yet to tread

An exceptional individual
Impossible not to love
He's no longer with us
But with the Lord above


Details | I do not know? | |

Black Cloud Circus

I have a growing black cloud in my heart 
My soul inside is slowly falling apart 
The decay of my spirit can be seen in sad eyes 
There is a growing attraction of this spectacle in an immeasurable size  

A freak show circus has come to town in this black cloud 
The audience comes with the currency of ridicule and judgment oh so proud! 
They point and laugh and mock me oh so cleverly! 
I am great for business because I am such a sad sight to see! 

No one knows what is really behind the curtains of my dark eyes 
Some where in my mind I pray for a quick demise 
I care too much and willing show the vulnerable card 
The audience mistakes my compassion for stupidity and labels me a retard 
 
There will be a point in time when I am just gone one day 
Some one will have to tell them the show is cancelled and to go away 
 
No more freak boy with the enlarged heart 
No more sensitive weirdo who is not too smart 
No drowning fish who can not do anything right 
Sorry your freak show was cancelled which brought you all such personal delight 

The time has come to find a new human attraction 
Some other poor bastard to mock for personal satisfaction 



Details | Rhyme | |

Sunicide

When the sun comes out,
And highlights the sea,
And honeysuckle round the garden twists,

I turn about,
For all I can see
Are the sparkling scars upon my wrists.


Details | Rhyme | |

Hatred

Hatred flows through my veins
I try to just hide the pain
You changed my way of life
I feel like I've been stabbed with a knife
I wish you could just go your separate way
You played my heart like it was clay
You don't seem to care
The pain I feel everywhere


You ask for forgiveness
You ask for another chance

You ask if we can be friends
Let this all be clensed
How could this have come to be
Everything between you and me
Its come to an end
Nothing could ever mend

What you did the other day
When all you had to do was say
I'm sorry Jarrod but its over
She doesn't realize, she was my controller :/

P.S. I'm sorry guys I'm going through rough times as these poems have said and I've been having family problems, from today on expect one poem a day and maybe 2 if I miss a day.


Details | I do not know? | |

You Take The Blame

Feelings of hatred,
seep down through my veins.
Crying alone on my bed,
tears of guilt and shame.
Why did you do it?
That night against my will.
Feelings of fear and suicide,
Haunt me still.
You made me feel worthless,
like a sick, dirty, mutt.
Like a knife that slides through me,
making cut after cut.
My feelings for you,
will always stay the same.
For you are the perpetrator,
You Take The Blame!


Details | Couplet | |

Stop

Stop right there before you die,
I throw away the knife and cry.
Living hurts too much I don't want to live.
I can no longer forget or forgive.
No! This has become out of hand.
The knife is now banned.
Please save me.
Don't be deaf to my plea.
Don't let me do it.
Hold my hand and guide me through it.


Details | Lyric | |

Mental Masochism

Welcome to the old you Hello, Hello, Despair so Crude, Dreams are gone Yet we still follow the old Path Where empathy kills And the Sympathy we find is another Lie You were born to deceive A puppet-master of emotion Back off this fixation while you have a chance Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Sorrow-- My Emotional High Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Better to be Frozen than Numb Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Exchange pleasure for pain It's all coming t you The facade of Joy falls again Violet Hearts crush easy Your Pain you don't Want this Your Sorrow, You Want This Back off this fixation while you have a chance Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Sorrow-- My Emotional High Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Better to be Frozen than Numb Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Back off this fixation while you have a chance Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Sorrow-- My Emotional High Who Would Want To Be This Cold? Better to be Frozen than Numb Who Would Want To Be This Cold?


Details | Free verse | |

A Lost Soul

Our linguistic limbs sulk as the
dreary day progresses.
It begs and aches for more pain
for it's grown accustomed.
The longing and desire that lingers
within the blood pulsating
As each day marches forth,
A feeling of hate submerges and
dominates the emotion sulking
back
Toward the dark core we now possess.


Details | Rhyme | |

Shell

I need to escape this shell.
Or else I'm going to burn in hell.
Please set me free.
Because this is not the real me.
I'm a puppet with tangled ropes.
I feel I've lost all my hopes.
They say it's only life.
Well tell that to my shiny knife.
I don't wanna use it.
I'm just digging a pit.
6 feel under.
This is my biggest blunder.
I can't stop crying.
This is a slow death I'm dying.
I'm inadequate and dumb.
Why have I gone numb?
This is wrong.
Do I have long?
I need a hero.
But I'm just a zero.
No more terror stricken nights.
This will end my pointless fights.


Details | I do not know? | |

You Words

Gracious scars fade away
Thickness of love trailing
Speechless moments rewind
My arms shake of fear
Soon as your soul appeared
Dropping the sharp thing
Tears bomb my cheeks
As you held me
Lifting my face towards your eyes
This can’t be
Unexpected surprise
Heart races fast as time
Remembering the day you died
Hard to believe
You’re standing here in front of me
Holding my heart in your palms
Our love seems to be strong
Causing breaks with blades
Leads nowhere
Holding me tight
Kissing my lips deeply
Softly saying “Stop this foolishness
Babe, you’re better than this
Don’t throw away your passion
Don’t kill your dream
Keep it all
All for me”


Details | I do not know? | |

Forwards

Man is not an island
Man is a drop of rain
We must land where we fall
We have no choice, no say
You cannot stop it
You cannot choose
Until you find your place
Until you find your path

Man is not an island
Man is a river
Swept along through a world of questions
Swept along to the final answer
You can only carve your path
You can only feel your way
We cannot slow
We cannot cease

Man is not an island
Man is the sea
I am surrounded, and lost
I cannot touch, but I can see
We can feel, we can know
We are changing, we are growing
You must learn
You must search

Man is not an island
Man is a wave
You are trapped in your course
You have set your path
Never moving backwards
Never looking forwards
Changing what you touch
Changing what you see
Changing
             Changing
                          Changing

Man is not an island
Man is a drop of rain
We have done what we can
We have made our choices
I cannot turn back
I cannot stop
You are ending
You are falling
Falling
         Falling
                  Falling


Details | Free verse | |

Afraid to write, For ending

I don’t want to write any poetry,
I really, really, don’t.
I’m afraid with what I might come up with,
I’m afraid of what I won’t.
I’ve lost most care for laughing,
Most hope and love, must change…
But I’m dying and dying deep inside,
And I yearn for that to change —
To end would be a bless,
Bestowed on only me.
And a cure to all the others,
Who say they lov’est me.


Details | I do not know? | |

Rain Drops

Tear drops falling from the sky
Each one has a sad story to tell
Who will listen?
And who will wipe them off their windsheild?
Tear drops everywhere
Ending their lives on the streets
Why do people find their sounds so peaceful?
Each tear drop is a musical note
Playing its own little, sad song
For the people willing to listen


Details | I do not know? | |

the past

she always thought they'd be forever

because of what he said.

he said that they'll always be together,

even if she's dead.

but it was just another one of his lies

he said he wasnt like other guys.

she should of never trusted him

and never believe it was true

about the stupid things he would say

or the things he would do.

"love" was just a word to him

he really never cared,

all the pictures of her and him are now just ripped and teared.



Details | Rhyme | |

Just 1

1 glance
1 dance
1 trance
1 chance
1 wink
1 drink
1 link
1 blink
1 crash
1 drive
1 drunk & high
1 teen
1 bribe
1 innocence
1 died
& all it took was
1 night
1 text
1 party
1 house
1 person
1's pressure
1 goal
1 first
1 thrill
1 last
1 kill


Details | Rhyme | |

Rope Swinging

Rope swinging up so high.
Now's the time I will die.
I step onto this chair.
Finally ending this nightmare.
I grab the noose.
Make sure it's not too loose.
Tears are falling.
All my hopes are quickly dying.
It's around my neck.
I make one final check.
Note in place.
Scribbled in a hurried pace.
Then there's a knock at the door.
The screams say, "open this door!"
I jumped.
The chair bumped.
Quickly loosing air.
Then to my despair...
In you came.
But I already ended the game.
To your knees you fell.
As I slowly drifted off to hell.


Details | I do not know? | |

Mom

You stare at me what do you see
Another face? A teen disgrace?
Don’t get to know me
Just another
Unreality
Pretend not to see
The blood on my cheek
Red tears in my eyes
I’ll hide behind lies
To protect you from
The pain filled delerium
Hidden within me
Spiraling away
A self destuctive existence
Beauty put to waste
On a manic soul
Push me back in place
I’ll haunt you no more
My forgotten face
Safe behind death’s door



Details | Free verse | |

Succumb to Illness

All those days spent in pain.

Memories washed away by the rain.

To have misplaced a forgotten loved one.

Falling into the depths of illness.

Now, I realize what it is like to succumb.

Where did those days of greatness go?

 

What have I become?

A monster with great power?

Maybe, I have succumb to illness.

My heart begins to beat.

Fast

Faster

Even Faster

As I hear the sirens buzzing in my ears.

 

In my mind...

I feel empty and dark.

In my mind...

I'm dying inside.

In my mind...

Voices are screaming words of terror.

 

I have lost.

The battle of life and death has been done.

It's what I hate most.

I have lost.

 

As I tell myself that it'll all be over soon...

I hear my mother saying "Sweetie wake up."

Stunned to death I awake.

Frantically, searching through my mind.

I find that I will never succumb to illness.


Details | Bio | |

They Say...

They Say
"Never look back, look toward the future"
But what if there is no future to look forward to
They Say
"Live everyday like it's your last"
All my memories, be of the past
All those memories should I cast
My bible says
"Look to the hills from which comes your health"
I've been looking so high, my eyes hurt
I've lossed my breath
Trying to find myself
Almost causing my death 
They Say
"Friends are forever"
Mine aren't 
They're the ones bringing me down
They Say
"Turn the other cheek"
Okay,then what?
Day in and out
They Say
"Laugh, it does the body good"
I'm very understood
My bible says
"He shall never put more on me, than I can bear"
I can't take it
I need help
They Say
"Smiles are contagious"
They hurt
And they take work
Don't need more distress
They Say
"Patience is a virtue"
But the more you wait
the more I get hurt
They Say
"Perservervance and determined to pay for itself"
I'm determined to succeed
But everyone else is stopping me
I'm in need of something, something more
They Say
"Success is how far you bounce when you hit bottom"
What if I don't stop bouncing but never get anywhere?
They Say
"Positive people don't put others down"
They're the main ones
Maybe they're too positive about themselves
They say
"Numbers are infinitive"
Is pain infiniive too
Is anger
Is lies
Is death
Is tears
Is lost love
Everything they say is wrong
They also say
"Everything happens for a reason"
Is pain and heartache supposed to happen
I wish death didn't happen
Wrong!!! Wrong!!!WRONG!!!!!!!!


Details | I do not know? | |

sadness is

sadness is depression,
when people cut their wrist.
sadness is plotting,
and people writing hit-lists.
sadness is hate,
while happiness is bliss.
sadness is reality,
waking to morning mist.


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Not Ready Part 1

Mother:

Shivering nights follow me as my stomach grows

I feel her inside me

I can picture her face, smile, personality

Worth such a huge future

But I couldn’t give it to her

I’m not ready…

He doesn’t want her

We couldn’t handle it

The pressure, the responsibility

And god the things that are happening to my body

I’m not ready

I’m not

My mom cries whenever she looks at me

My dad doesn’t even look

I couldn’t take care of her by myself

Maybe…maybe I can give her away

To a family that could love her until I’m ready

There’s so much I haven’t done

Goals I haven’t fulfilled

All my dreams are gone

Because of a mistake

A onetime mistake

I learned my lesson

But I can’t take care of this baby

She needs so much more,

She deserves so much more

I can’t let her come into this world like this

I’m not ready

 

Daughter:

Its ok mommy

You don’t have to worry

You’re not alone

I still love you

You can still follow your dreams if you try

And teach me how to do right

I’m going to be a sweet baby

People are going to call me your twin

Don’t you like the sound of that mommy?

I promise to do my best in everything

So I can make you proud mommy

When I come

We’ll have each other

And that’s all that's going to matter

We’ll prove everyone wrong

And do better than anyone expected

We can do it mommy

You can do it

I believe in you

 

Mother:

I can’t do this

I can’t

I’ll try again when I’m ready

It’s not even alive yet

So it’ll be ok

He said he would leave me

My dad said I was stupid

And my mom…

She had such high hopes and dreams for me

I can still do it

I can make them proud

But not with this thing growing in me

It’s ok

It can’t feel anything

And later on ill be the best mother ever

But not now

I’m not ready


Details | Free verse | |

Self-Harm

Huddled crying masses 
Bodies fallen to the floor 
Here’s the world that she lives in 
The world behind closed doors 
They each have their secrets 
Yet a secret that they all share 
The pain of life made manifest 
In bruises and pulled hair 
And some they have gone farther 
Than any one cares to see 
Drowning in the river 
Of blood that they each have set free 
This place it makes them sisters 
This place it makes them friends 
This place its constant torture 
Their problems never end 
A common man may glimpse upon 
the problems that they face 
But never would he journey to 
Set foot upon this place 
This place where tears are halted 
By the slicing of the skin 
the place where they're all desperate 
Use a razor, needle, pin 
No matter what they try and do 
We still cannot escape 
And others will not reach their hand 
For fear that it will break 
Depression is the master here 
With daily sacrifice 
Of blood and anger pouring forth 
Self-hate, a deadly vice 
Though lonely as they tend to be 
The secrets make them one 
Together they will over come 
This hate before they are done 
Yet the blood that they spill wont hurt them
Nor the bruises, Nor the pain 
For they are all strong 
Their courage far from plain 
Yes she knows she is strong enough 
To hurt herself again 
This most vicious of all cycles 
We will never see the end 



Details | Free verse | |

Death

The anger within me hides as 
apart of me seeks eruption.
I want to die.
I truly do.
For when I leave this dreadful 
place, I will go on to better.
A place for me and my Lord to 
have fun and sing!
I want to leave.
Far from the hatred and discord 
of this world.
A stay longer than this will 
inflict more pain and sorrow
into my life.
I want to die.
I truly do.
For when I die, I know I wont 
be missed.
I can care less about anyone 
else anymore.
Everyone who has stamped my 
heart with hate
Can go to hell
and feel the pain they have 
called upon me.


Details | Narrative | |

Rape My Future

I want to hide in the closet
My heart jumps with fear
I wish I wasn't here
The arguing begins to come to an end 
Tears began to escape my eyes
The shadow that locks my view
Is so cruel and devious 
I lock the door in fear 
Of what lurks in the shadows
What lurks beyond that door
The door knob turns with creaks of misery
The thought of what the cruel shadow might do 
Escapes my mind to hide in the dark corners 
Of the world that I was once afraid
Even though I fear the loneliness of the dark
The loneliness of the dark comforts my fears
The door opens in inches like a snake 
Awaiting its next meal like prey in the jungle
The pain makes the breathe escape my lips
The flesh to flesh touch makes my body numb
The rivers flow between thy legs
Where is thy protector?
I should speak for the cruel shadow
That shows me his pain and misery throughout life.
And now
Here I stand underneath the belt of poverty 
Rape my future
An I shall be one with poverties own.


Details | Quatrain | |

Suicide Survives

Fictitious families
Dysfunctional means
Compromised children
Capricious teens

Serrated self-loathing
Culling scarred skin
Dapper diagnoses
Dulling depression’s din

Psychotropic pulses
Sedentary screams 
Subjugated subjects
Catharsis of dreams

Dusk dawning
In convenience’s vanity
Vociferous voices
Pilfering sedated sanity

Slurred smiles
Lithium lies
Hanging from vestiges
Suicide survives


Details | Blank verse | |

The Transgressor

Clouds of an Occult day Words of a Darkmaster Chill My Mind Freeze my Eyes Hidden Forever I'll be; Shadow walk You will Never see me It's time to anew I'll Lose you I cannot forget The Blood I cannot-- Forgive you Locked in my cell I'm never far I'll Never Bleed For you Again Loosing Vitality Mistakes cannot be Fixed Forever you and I will Drown Sacred Words Of you Do not Render Complete Obsolete Cords of Vile you wrap around the flowers how east it must be I wasn't Born this Way you Made me this Way Locked in my cell I'm never far I'll Never Bleed For you Again Loosing Vitality Mistakes cannot be Fixed Forever you and I will Drown Sacred Words Of you Do not Render Complete Obsolete Sacred Words Of you Do not Render Complete Obsolete Sacred Words Of you Do not Render Complete Obsolete


Details | I do not know? | |

The Wave

A small, white scar
a fading bruise
an upset stomach
nothing to lose
nothing to gain
alone and afraid
numb with pain
the feel of a cut
and a stab in the skin
the song listened to
and im crying again
to just get away
to some other place
so they won't look
at the look on my face
the smile, the frown
its all going down 
to the dark
to the death
and the wave at its crest
crashes down on my head
and the closing
the end
and its done


Details | I do not know? | |

Daddy's Girl

Looking back at the years.Rembering the times that are dear.Though they are gone and in 
the past
the memories in my heart will always last,of a time i was a little girl and my daddy was 
my whole world.

He was always there.Now hes gone and it isnt fair.Its been over a year since he died.And 
i still feel the pain deep inside.

Oh how i miss him so.I dont understand why he had to go.I know i told him in the end how 
i loved him so,and it wasnt that easy just to let him go.

In that final breath i would have changed everything .Things that werent so important 
then i now see .How i would of done things diffrently.Things i did do and i few i 
didnt.I cant go back to the start,I wish i could with all my heart.If i knew then what i 
know now,things could of been diffrent somehow.

I always knew he loved me,and though he is in heaven and not where he should be,forever 
in my heart i will be daddys girl.


Details | I do not know? | |

Brutality

Sitting here.
in the blackened darkness.
there is no light,
no sign of life.
and my heart beats slowly,
my veins pulse blood,
the blood could be black,
the blood could be red.
but the color does not matter
because its all going to be on the floor soon.
the darkness is unrelenting,
this depression is all but sad.
this lack of light,
the loss of life,
has become my closest friend.
my human friends are gone,
left to decay.
my soul is gone,
lost and betrayed.
and yet i sit here,
happy as can be,
bleeding on the ground.
knowing that i will soon be gone too.


Details | I do not know? | |

Emmett Till 2011

So there was black kid
His name was Vincent
Chubby and innocent
Intelligent, but belligerent
Aged 13, he had his first crush
Abigail, a white girl
Pigtails and eyes colored like clam pearls
Only conflict, her family was racist
Her older brother, Nathan, would make threatening faces
He constantly chased Vincent from around her
However, one day, Vincent did find her
Alone by a lake, gazing over the crystal water
He walked over and decided to talk to her
She found he was a pretty nice boy
Not like any other guy who would treat her like a toy
It was then that they shared each other's first kiss
Vincent and Abigail couldn't even believe this
Their hearts were racing
Hormones were pacing
But up from behind them, became good ol Nathan
However, he had a gang of guys with him
Vincent knew at that moment he was finished
So he started running, as fast as he could
But he tripped over a piece of wood and lost balance
Fell in a pile of dirt, and couldn't regroup
Next thing he knew, he was beaten black and blue
Unnoticeable in the conclusion, and Nathan got the allusion
To bury the body somewhere, but threw it in the lake
Poor Abigail cried her eyes out, she couldn't take it
The pain, the violence she had witnessed
The pure kiss from a black kid's lips
Sound familiar? Somewhat if you know your history
I nicknamed him Emmett Till
Pure misery


Details | Rhyme | |

I'm Giving Up

You reach for me, you try to grab my hand,
But now I see, without you I can stand.
How could you look into my eyes, and swear?
Just more lies, do you even care?
My heart began to crumble, always depression…
You weren’t there to catch me when I would stumble, just more suppression.
Why do I continue to cry, I constantly wipe away tears.
Cant I just die, I can’t fight my fears.
Another fire inside, it burns so bright.
But I try to hide, always out of fright.
I'm so tired of being here, I feel so dead.
The pain starts to seer, throughout my head.
You tell me to move on, not to wait.
Now that you’re gone, all that I feel is hate.
I’ve tried so hard, to hold onto my hope.
Yet I've been scarred, when life doesn’t cope.
Now I am left behind, because I waited for you.
But you can’t seem to find, I can’t be found too.
Some memories, that can’t erase.
Everyone now sees, my true face.
I dropped my mask, and sat alone.
Why do you still ask, “don’t you want to talk on the phone?”
I sit rubbing at another scar, watching the blood run free.
I guess you were right by far, still I don’t see.
My wounds so sore, now I’m torn.
This rages my inner war, why was I born?
You say you do regret, but you seem so God damn set.


Details | Rhyme | |

Scars

Rain is pouring down,
Falling from the sky.
Tears are all that fall,
Straight from my eyes.

Ever since you left me,
My world has been flipped upside down.
I miss your smile, your laugh, and your voice,
And you just being around.

You said you’d always be here,
To watch and help me grow.
I want you to be here to teach me,
Everything I need to know.

But one day you decided,
That your life was just too tough.
So then you just figured,
That you’d had enough.

So you finally decided to take your own life,
Which really dimmed ours.
Now all that’s left,
Are scars on our hearts.


Details | Free verse | |

The hurts of the parasites

Eating me from inside
All these feeling like little tiny parasites
Feeding on the host
Making you weaker
Little by little
Those parasites slowly eating away at your body
Nothing to make them stop
They are ruthless

And you don’t know it but they are slowly killing you from the inside out
Now you feel the pain
The feeling the little parasites
Eating you away
It hurts

Now that you feel this pain
You have no clue how to cure it
The pain is horrible
It makes you light headed and dizzy
Yet there is a bunch of people out there 
But they can’t see it
The walk past as it you’re not there 
You try and call for help
But no one want help the just ignore you and keep going on
You’re on your knees now pleading crying out for help
“HELP ME PLEASE HELP! WHY CAN’T U HELP ME WHAT DID I DO WRONG!?”

You’re basically on your death bed now
No one is with you holding your hand
Talking to you crying talking you to your death
Keeping you comfort
Telling you they love you
Now all is lost the parasites have overcame you till
You hear your phone ringer go off
The door open
You get the text that says I love you
The person comes through that door and holds your hand telling you how much they love you

That spark comes back igniting your body to life
The parasites living now dyeing the feelings becoming great ones
The ones you want
A big grin grows across your face
You sit up
You reply to the text I love you too
Life now is worth living 


Details | Lyric | |

Is It You

You are my Hope You are My truth You are my Love You are the reason For me I can't do this Alone always be there for me and I'll promise to Live


Details | Free verse | |

Die

My father whispered the word in my ear...

Die!

All of a sudden life turned into great fear.

Die!

Such an awful sounding word.

Die!

Makes me think we live in an awful world.

 

Will power...

Crumbles just like a flower.

Left in pain and agony for all to see.

That someone could lack so much care.

It's hard to even take a breath of air.

Will power...

 

My father whispered the word in my ear...

Die!

All of a sudden life turned into great fear.

Die!

Such an awful sounding word.

Die!

Makes me think we live in an awful world.

 

Plaguing my mind with intruding thoughts of death.

Maybe this will be my last breath.

Insanity is the only thing left.

With decades of torture and silence.

The only thing left to do is die!


Details | Free verse | |

What is Freedom

I'll show them what they did to me...

I'll ruin their lives next.

I'll make them SUFFER.

See how they feel.

To be muted.

In this disgusting atmosphere.

The place that we call "school."

 

How awful of a life without freedom.

What is Freedom!?

Does it exist...?

Trapped here in this sickening place.

Everyone likes to call "School."

An atmosphere of over-whelming doom.

Why must I be used as a tool?

 

I hate them.

Feasting for blood.

I want their blood.

That will color my hair.

Blood.

Blood.

It will do the trick.

To feed my agony...

To escape my mind.

My question will be answered.

What is Freedom!?


Details | I do not know? | |

Teenage Suicide

I don't think that she hears my screams
I watch the knife blade as it gleams
Because my smile isn't what it seems
On the outside

I'm ready just to grab the knife
Just about to take my life
Finally the end to all my strife
I finally can hide

Everybody is a liar
bottling up all of their fire
I wish that there was someone I could admire
But everybody has lied

They say you swing the bat and miss
That you and him are going to kiss
Please don't tell anybody this
It's in you I confide

My life's a secret so unkept
My eyes wide open as you slept
I'm just a nobody, that's my rep
I'm so locked up inside

And even when I'm gone they'll say
The same old things, every day
It'll be the same in every way
The teenage suicide


Details | Couplet | |

A Dead Rose

The rose grows unbalanced to the right
Because she is deprived of light,

Water is scarce, but when it can run,
The rose soaks it up and leans into the sun,

Her thorns are stunted and endearingly tender,
Though this means they do not have strength to defend her,

Her petals are thin and so easily torn,
Such a delicate flower the bush never had borne,

But far fairer roses selfishly surround her,
And this is how the gardener found her.

So pull out her petals so pretty and pale,
And break off her prickles so fragile and frail,

Then cut off her head and leave her to decay,
Tend the wilier roses and just walk away.

And as her sap weeps as she withers and rots,
The rose is watched smugly by the flowers in their pots,

And as she lies dying in darkness on the floor,
They turn to the sun and lounge in it some more,

And when the rain washes the dead rose away,
The flowers are asleep and have nothing to say.


Details | Ballad | |

Luciferia I-- Cease To Exist

I sense something in her eyes that feels like tragedy She closed her heart but its dark pulse Wilts and stetchs against the wanes How many days will the passion bleed Till it subsides into the new pain We are the ones who will face the blame ''Don't you see what's infront of me, I have to face it all I know there's something wrong help is what I want but it's not what I find You're all filled with troubling lies and incoherent minds Cant you see you're strangling me with every last word There's something you don't know Lying in my heart is why you want to throw the stone'' Her raven eyes fill the silence Luciferia we cease to exist it's burning away-- all others' reliance Luciferia we cease to exist my darkly darling don't fade away Luciferia we cease to exist beware we've became their prey Luciferia we cease to exist


Details | I do not know? | |

Writing In Blood

Crying a flood of tears,
Always having those fears
Of trusting others.
Life still dissatisfying even with brothers.
Cutting one self open,?Writing with blood.
Always feeling lonely and homely,
Hopelessly waiting
For the one & only,
So hurt...
Believing that everything is deceiving,
Thinking that she's only dreaming...
Killing just to see if she?Will go into her true awakening.
Bloody writings,
Left behind,
Writing in blood saying,
"There is no point in living."
She was one of a kind,
So now they wonder,
Why writing in blood
Was all she left behind.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Cannot Go On

Held up here again, and it's
Threatening to burst out of my skin,
I can feel it eating away at me, corroding
The heart of me, brutal and bloodthirsty
But so it goes on...

She's lurking round here and she's
Relentlessly lying in wait for me,
Ready to laugh as I edge around the corner,
'Cause I'm alone and she knows that she's cursed me,
And so it goes on...

Surely if this was real then the angst from my arms would be
Taking life with it as it slips down my sides?
Even this way out, the gates are all locked and barred,
I need so much more than existence provides,

Encased in a fortress of fright and
Bad memories, there's nowhere to go
And I'm scared and I'm shaking but still
I stagger on like a poor puppet show,
And so it goes on...

Screaming 'til the world wakes up,
I could sleep forever but I've already had enough,
Resorting to this violence to attract some
Attention when I'm dying to lie low,
How can I go on...?

Time can't last forever and perhaps now they'll see that
I'm serious when I say I can't take it anymore,
Last chance and last cheek wet from failure and fighting,
Strange when this escape is what I'm crying for...

I cannot go on.


Details | Lyric | |

The Promises of Angel Wings

A soul departed, a life unlived
And yet, a heart still beats
Despite their best attempts,
A death, this person cheats.

They escape with just a mark on their wrist
But a tragedy on their heart
Living in the aftermath of survival
Is really just the start.

It gets worse as time moves on
And this person drifts away
As one wise poet tells us,
"Nothing gold can stay."

Not all memories can last forever
This young girl doesn't want to at all
She doesn't want to travel on into life
She refuses every letter, e-mail, and phone call.

She delves deeper into herself
And her once golden heart turns black
That's all that remains of this once-beautiful girl
Her soul is what she lacks.

The end of the road for this child
Comes sooner than many wish to believe 
She takes her own life and leaves behind
The promises of angel wings.


Details | Rhyme | |

all that i can say

swiftly pierced,
by cupid's loaded bow,
wrapped up in ribbons,
but the bleeding doesn't slow,
winter's breath,
upon a tear streaked face,
leaving icy marks,
of love as thin as lace,
to love the summer sun,
is to give the snow away,
for springs thorns and buds,
to bloom a warmer day,
and when the icy wind,
tore us apart,
you quickly found another,
to warm your long dead heart...


uh... sorry...


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Weeds

Eating the weeds from the grass you slept in last night.
Don't look down or you'll fall from the moon.

Can you pick yourself up?
can you make it home?
Jump, and hope god will save you.

No faith.

No G.O.D

Just you

Bruised and rotting
You make it seem easy

Dream in the fields of all those yesterdays
and pick the weeds for the hope of  tom marrow


Details | Rhyme | |

Bathroom Floor

I lay on the bathroom floor. 
I can't take this anymore. 
I can't believe you were so sleezy. 
Now watch this blood flow freely. 
I didn't know I could hurt this bad, over what we never had. 
Now watch this knife meet my skin, with you I know I'll never win. 
Do you know how much I care? 
Even when your never there? 
Do you hear my silent cries? 
This could be my last goodbye. 
Anger runs through my veins. 
All it will take is some pain. 
Watch me end my life with this knife. 
Pray and hope I don't choke. 
Don't flake out on your only way out. 
I'll carve your name in my flesh in hope we someday mesh. 
I know I'm not the best, but no worries as I meet my eturnal rest.


Details | Verse | |

Silent in the Wake

Death is imminent
with a ruthless grasp
even those deemed immortal
can never escape

we fight It in vain
to ever suffer
Death may seem a blessing
when pain is at stake

some make It occur
and always regret
for those souls left endure
despair none can shake

we watch this demise 
alone in our thoughts
and we can do nothing
do nothing but wait

until time is spent
and we see It invade
bowed heads weep in silence
silent in Death's wake


Details | I do not know? | |

Summon & Control A Bloody Mary

Bloody Mary,
Bloody Mary,
Bloody Mary,
O' so scary.

Putting mortals,
to the test,
come on out,
at my request.

Bridge the gap,
that is between,
all that is,
and everything.

I call upon,
a Bloody Mary,
being of vengence,
O' so scary.

Come forth,
into the light,
of this night,
so to serve me,
and to help,
me with my fight.


Details | I do not know? | |

Death and Sirens

She tastes like Death and sings like Sirens.
She's tragically perfect and everyone could tell.
She'd dance with a Hatred, mistaken for Passion
With smiles like Car Crashes, who would ever know?
She's fatally beautiful in every single way,
Fatally beautiful, but toxic to the touch,
But the face of Beauty is only skin deep,
And her beauty is only as deep as her deepest cut.

She tastes like Death and sings like Sirens.
She's the stars in the sky and everyone could tell,
She'd love with a Fury, mistaken for Devotion
With smiles like Fireworks, who would ever know?
She's gracefully innocent in every single way,
Gracefully innocent, but a master of Illusion,
But the grace of Innocence is only short lived,
And her innocence is the only gift she can give

She tastes like Death and sings like Sirens.
She's heartbrokenly cynical and nobody could tell.
She'd speak with an Intelligence laced with Experience
With smiles like Thunderstorms, who would ever know?
She's masterfully disguised in every single way,
Masterfully disguised; her smile, her most famous piece,
But the mastery of disguise is a means for her to hide,
In the case of Death and Sirens, it's her only release.


Details | Rhyme | |

Ice Cold Hands

The only way to avenge her ghosts
Was to become a ghost herself
Forever haunts her own lonely heart
That she left on her bedroom shelf

Their emotions in a tangle
The room began to swirl
She was mummys perfect angel
And daddys little girl

Scared of failure she lost it all
The fire in her eyes was out
The will to live she failed to grasp
Her bloodless veins in drought

Now in the solitary churchyard
The lonely gravestone stands
A little girl lies far below
Two ice cold grasping hands


Details | Free verse | |

Only Sixteen

Can you believe I’m only sixteen
Seeing the world so black and white
You ask what could I have seen?
Nothing. Just an endless night

That glass is half empty
That flower is wilting
There is death aplenty
And I’m just starting

There isn’t comfort in life
I’m a realist
Find peace quicker with a knife
Never an optimist

Laugh if you will
Just trying to spare you the pain
Hatred can only kill
Embrace the acid rain

Everything must die 
Mothers cry
Fathers lie
And I just fly


Details | Lyric | |

JUST LIE

VERSE 1:
I’ll never forget our first date
Rushing Home even though we were late
I asked what to say if they asked why
And without hesitation, you said just lie

VERSE 2:
When the big decision came about
And suddenly my mind was filled with doubt
When I became so timid and shy
You consoled me by saying, honey just lie

CHORUS:
Just lie; Lie here in my arms
Trust in me, and I’ll keep you from harm
Believe in me when times get hard
When you’re with me you can let down your guard
I can give you things money can’t buy
So without hesitation darling, just lie

VERSE 3:
A few months later I found out the news
It was all my decision but I couldn’t choose
So when I told you it was too late
We had nothing but nine months to wait

VERSE 4:
After the birth, I knew something wasn’t right
It was hard, but I had to give up the fight
With my last few breaths, I began to cry
As you grasped my hand, I’ll never forget your reply

CHORUS:
Just lie; Lie here in my arms
Trust in me, and I’ll keep you from harm
Believe in me when times get hard
When you’re with me you can let down your guard
I can give you things money can’t buy
So without hesitation darling, just lie

I’m lying now sweetheart, yet that’s not where I’ll stay
I’m with you in your heart and every prayer you pray
This is not yet our last good-bye
And when the pain becomes too much honey, just lie


Details | Blank verse | |

"We'll make headlines"

Tighten your lips,
Don’t sing tonight.

Just cry dear.

Your taste of dry splinters.
An cry of glass.
Both Eyes may bleed,
But hearts drain forever,
With a beat between the drags.

Bones thin as hair.

Stand up, straighten your back.
A spine of needles,

Smoke as thread.
Spin Metal twine up my spine.

Thread my eye lids.
Pluck the lashes.

Heart full of smoke.
Maybe this time,

We’ll make headlines.


Details | Blank verse | |

[Lullaby Sing]

Those mute tones.
The way you smile.
You didn’t want to starve alone.
I joined your fall.
You supply my hunger.

  Let the


.:I
        L
            L.:


CRAVINGS

    .R.
  .O.
    .L.
  .L.




Throw my life away.
Turning stale, already hollow.
I taste of sour memories and bitter velvet.
You’re still rotting

Sing me that song,
The one that makes me cry.
Ill make you god.
Get me H I G H E R  then HIGH.


Don’t stop.

I wanna go where you can’t reach.



L|U|L|L|U|B|Y                                       
                   
                        .        :                      .:
         
            ...::                                ..::.:.
         
                    .:..::-"*S*                                ::.. 
                                      -==-               
                                  ------------      *I*-
                                      -==-
           
              .:                *N*-
                                                            .:.
                                                             

                                            *G*"-                      ..::


Details | I do not know? | |

To Die

Take a gun and put it to your head.
You tell your self this,"I am  better off dead."
You the trigger and that bullet comes out.
but what if you don't die, theres always that doubt.

Take some pills, and try 2 overdose.
You watch the world spin
you fall down and the paramedics come but u don't die
your left mentally disabled, this is no lie.

Take a knife and stab yourself.
And watch the blood flow.
Your little sister comes in, and that's what you had to show.
There she is watching  you die slowly.
why would you want to see her cry?


Details | Epic | |

breath

Breathe when no air is found
Let me hold a solid grip
As we now walk on solid ground
Telling lies straight to your face
To show of all of their weakness
Letting them bring disgrace
Showering in the lies they tell
While truth is never enough
For here we are today
Walk together when times are rough
A bump in the path as frequently as a smooth step in a midnight clear
Letting the wind whisper to sit and let the entire world hear
Misery in this eternity 
For here I hold truth in my empathy 
Showing love why did you die
So you not see the tears I cry 
Praying for forgiveness
For I have lost you now
For here I am to morrow 
As I sit and let this frown find binding in my empty heart
 Letting every story find a new start
Beginning from the end
I lost a friend
To Bullying 
For ever rest in piece 


Details | Blank verse | |

Put Me To Death

Put me to death under an old sycamore tree,

Lay me to rest so wild and free,

I’m looking down on a place I once knew,

Put me to death I’m ready to go,

The world is cold and haughty I swear,

Don’t cry for me though I am gone I am never that far away,

Put me to death this is what you’ve always wanted,

Let me go in peace for I’m no longer loved,

If I’m battered and bruised it won’t make a difference for I have been put to death 
for reasons I don’t understand,

Put me to death under my old sycamore tree,

Put me too death and leave me be.




Details | Free verse | |

Untitled

Part One: Scream

I am wrong.  
Wrong hair, wrong clothes, wrong me.
This sugar coated death surrounds me, this candy cigarette.
This death that is slow, uncertain, yet sure.  When everyone chooses
not to see what is Wrong.
My only wish is that it wasn't so slow; the time dripping away like a sickeningly sweet syrup.
I will never make it out of here.
I will never be able to escape the crushing unfamiliarity of my life.
I scream, but no one hears.

Part Two: Whisper

The walls of this self-imposed solitude close in around me.  
Try to forget, try to forget.
If I forget, maybe it never happened.
Maybe my identity will settle into place, and  I can survive.
But for now, I hide.
I hide because it's easy.  Because it's safe.
I hide so I can breathe.
Even though my breath is only a whisper.

Part Three: Speak

Just like spring always follows even the darkest of winters, I no longer hide.
I dig in the dirt, forcing myself to be grounded, to be real.
Now is the time to grow.  The past is past, but the future is yet to come.
I will never forget, but not forgetting is a kind of strength.
One I will hold on to with every fiber of my being.
I am no longer screaming, no longer hiding and whispering.
I speak;
and the world listens.


Details | Ballad | |

Only She Cries

What If I told You That I Loved you
would we care
would we die
 Chains surrounding Alice
Only She Cries
 
World Banished her
Love left her
all Alone
Melancholia presides over
 
Alice dies again
Will she ever reign
 
Will she ever see
what’s here to be
Only She Cries
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
Empty Without a savoir
Will She ever be cured from this
will she breakaway
Gaia couldn’t be so cruel
Just to wail away—Let the Banshee Crie
Just wail away the pain
wail away the pain
 
Enter my heart and you’ll see
that Was the only thing you could ever need
Alice; only she cries
let it show
That love never dies
Through Euphoria
through melancholia
 
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
She’s a ghost
Nobody to call Her name
Only She Cries
will she not live
whispers of her Raven mind
only control her
There’s no hope
Only she Cries
What If I told You That I Loved you
 
 
You didn’t know
how you could save her
Only if you could her
Alice dies
Only she cries


Details | Rhyme | |

Dance of Death

Blood shot eyes.
A million failed tries.
Death is impossible.
Only I am responsible.
They are going to isolate me.
Dark room I cant see.
I've gone crazy in my mind.
Everyone I know has left me behind.
I give up.
I'll just shut up. 
Silence is bliss.
My razor gives me a single kiss.
Deep and long.
Me and my razor dance to a song.
We zigged and we zagged.
My razor is slowly being dragged.
I take my last and final breathe.
As we finish our dance of death.


Details | Free verse | |

Turning Anguish part 2

Missing a remarkable meaning in my life
I’m the woeful sacrifice
play me as the dice
on the solid table
and roll me and speak of a fable
don’t toss me 
like a valueless toy
brushing…echoing harsh envy
Heed to our last plea 

You’ll face dire rage 
giving no mercy to your desire
Are you aware you fed my wrath?

Mercy-filled bliss
don’t exist in this pile of vile
father…mother
Don’t bother to trace our passing ease
that we dearly missed

What could brew these ruins to love?
Disbelief covers my once kind heart 
conquered by avarice
Unforgettable doom,
has been written on our tombs,
sending us a last kiss of unmoved death
Giving us futility…
Leaving us without a breath

Behave and deal with
frightening bolts that dare
break us apart
and turn it to denied anguish

Who’s doing all the blaming?
Who’s choosing our faults?
We all do our part in it
That’s the troubling truth
Toil cheers up the spoil
What could we do
to get us ahead of
Power?
stricken in toil
Separate the spoil 
that crumbles away like foil

Give us little power
and lift up the broken twin towers
and fill us with 
Unspoiled love
The only choice
is to patch-up our love
and strip off the turning anguish
and fill us with 
Unspoiled love

The only choice
is to patch-up our love
and strip off the turning anguish
and fill us with 
Unspoiled love
Your sun will shun out strife
and be a kit to fix up concealed love
and fill us with
harmless love 


Details | Free verse | |

Goodbye This Is Suicide

I’m sorry everybody,
For what I’m about to do,
I never could live up to you,
Nobody ever noticed,
Nobody was ever sad,
But I still wanted to tell you,
Something very bad,
I don’t have the will to live,
My life is filled with too much suffering,
I can’t take it anymore,
But I’ve lost all hope in my heart,
The days that depart,
Tore my heart apart,
I’m bleeding from the inside,
And from the out,
I just wanted to tell you,
This is what life’s about,
In the end we all die,
And my end is sooner,
I’m sorry everybody,
For all the trouble I’ve caused,
But I’m leaving now,
Goodbye,
It’s time for me to rest,
I want peace at last,
I know you’ll all be sad,
But I’ll be happy now,
This life has been long,
At least it was to me,
But now it’s time for sleep and rest,
Finally I’ll never wake up,
Goodbye everybody,
Have the good life I never had,
Goodbye this is suicide.


Details | Free verse | |

My True Happiness

these thoughts that consume me arent the ones that used to be
i dont know who i am anymore im lost cant you see
i let myself slowly slip away from reality
the blood that would run through my veins has turned black
and im not sure if there is a way to turn back
i dont recognize my mind anymore 
i dont even know how i got on the floor 
i am helpless or is it that i just dont want to be helped?
i wanna let go of everything cuz nothing matters more
i wanna be free and happy
these thoughts of suicide are killing me inside
i dont know how to decide if to take this knife to my throat 
or let my suffering choke me to death
what am i waiting for it wouldnt make a difference
the earth would keep rotating and the moon would go around 
the only difference is there would be one less
in a world full of stress
i mean think bout it when was the last time you remembered 'bout the last 
person that died
or that u actually thought bout it so much that you cried
probably a long time ago
what would make it different with me??
no one understands thats the one true thing that would make me happy


Details | I do not know? | |

Thrills

I was looking for a new direction
To avoid the eye of your attention
The hurt i caused wasn't my intention
but now iv e caught the poppers infection
Im sorry for the pain i caused
But when they offered me the thrills
I never even paused
I snapped them up in my paws
And now your pain is all my cause


Details | Free verse | |

Cold night

I look up at the sky,
I'm wondering how you're doing tonight.
The crisp air, sends shivers down my spine.
That same shiver when I found out you died.

It's been almost two years, 
and I know I should move on.
But there's a part of me that's missing,
and it won't let me get strong.

As I look at the stars, I start to wonder,
why did you have to plunder, away from us all?
I'll never really know the purpose
for you to die, but I can't just sit around and cry.

At times when the world seems perfect, 
I still think that you are around.
I drive by your house, but it's not yours anymore.
You're place is in Heaven.

That cold fatal night, when I couldn't go,
I thought I'd see you tomorrow though.
Who would have known,
this would be our last time we ever said a word. 

Because then... 

you crashed. 
Crashed away from my world,
disappeared into the sky,
and I don't understand, why you had to die.


Details | Rhyme | |

Video Games VS Real Life: Driving

Video Games VS Real Life: Driving
     By Dane Smith-Johnsen

(The Video Game)
There he was on the racetrack.
Eager!  Darting in and out.
Slipping, sliding, glancing back
Boisterous screams and driving dreams -

Speed: 190 on the turn
Devil daring, no concern,
Winning was his deepest yearn.
Screeching tires.  Rubber burned!

Adrenalin: wild!  Swelling. 
Checkered flag showing, eyes gleamed.
The finish line, fans yelling,
Hit the gas, racecar unseen!

“Flying”, wildly waving arms,
“X’s” pop up on the screen.
Bells and buzzers sound alarms.
Crash!!!  Game over.  Sweet machine!

(Real Live Driving)
There he was on the roadway.
Other drivers round about.
Clearly in a rush that day,
So, he darted in and out.

Speeding: 90 on the curve.
Almost “flying” memories churned.
Suddenly, he had to swerve.
Leaving tracks of rubber burned!

Adrenalin rising… loft-
Speeding cab with people dear,
All, too soon he cut them off.
Hit the gas; this pass he’d clear.

But in his rearview mirror,
Upside down, a rolling cab.
Police sirens blared nearer.
Life over:  His freedom nabbed.


Details | Free verse | |

Blade

The silver blade slides over my wrist
The smooth metal slices my skin open
My crimson blood pours out
I hold my bleeding wrist over the sink
The blood drips onto the cool marble
There's a knock on the hollow door
An angry voice yells "get out of there"
I turn on the water and rinse out the sink
I watch the icy water mix with warm blood
The sweet blood disappears down the drain
I pull at my sleeves to cover my many scars
I open the door and go to my quiet room
I sit silently on my bed
I open my journal and begin to write
My thoughts rush onto the paper
The words i use hide my truth
They mask the real me from unknowing people around me
They keep my secrets safe from wandering eyes


Details | Ballad | |

Marie II-- Troubled Tides

Wake up with a dream on your eyes left with the hearts that bid you Goodbye Shadow Dreamer-- Poisoned Lover Venom seeps through the Way The Way you held on to Me There's a Thorn in your Heart I left it there so the dreams and your pain shall unfold Inside you and all of your Lithium Lovers You're my lover, My Dear The Greatest Enemy I had to Contend pretending with "I Love You" but I know you Hate me till Hell's End Is it in Vain? You Sleep with the hate How can you dodge the fate? You let the Dagger dance on your Tongue You are my beloved Enemy Marie


Details | I do not know? | |

Spiritual Growth

Soul growing
Spirit going
Torn to pieces
not knowing
Lend what can be borrowed
Drowned beliefs, in my sorrow.
Crushed, bruised, beaten inside
leaving my soul no where to hide
Scars of ink, past and gone
break when tears fall my night begins to dawn.
Demonizing, and realizing
No sense in decriminalizing.
Free before birth
And then after death
I wont regret my last breath.


Details | I do not know? | |

World of no meaning

everyone stands so proud
of what we do to the crowd
people die, and set us free
But why is it based on falsetivity

I really think theres no meaning
to this war that isn't defeating
People die, and go away
Leaveing there families
alone and they stray

this world we live is 
is slowly fading 
into the black hole
that we are fighting

someday will come when we won't be here
and this world will just be anoter
black hole of Fear


Details | I do not know? | |

Life..

No one knows what lays beneath or what it is I can be
There is an identity below that  you can't see
I contain a series of layers you don't know exist
I am not an ordianry kid, I dont fit on a list
Struggles I've gone through are not one of a kind
But not knowing what to do almost losing my mind
Different because these obstacles I have conquered
Though my life for the most part has been full of torture
Being bragged about doesnt always feel so good
Your parents don't always treat you the way they should
Being put down and being told you never could
And every time you'd cry yourself to sleep cuz you were down
Felt the world take over you and wanting to drown
When love hurt like a need under your skin
All you could do is cry because of the pain
Being surrounded by every one and feeling the lonelyest peron on earth
That when everything seemed to fall you feel your biggest mistake is birth
The thoughts that roam my head have been thought of before
But not from me not from one with another identity
When will I feel safe?
From the world full of hurt?
When will I stop crying?
Will it be the day I stop trying?
Im trying to survive the struggles life lays ahead of you
Not having one to tell you what to do
Let me slowly think of the words that I will last say
While I wait for my final day


Details | Bio | |

Scream.

Some times I feel as if I need to scream,
Let it all out,
The hate,
Rejection,
Sadness,

Just to let it all out would feel so great,
I wish no one could hear me,
SCREAM.

Today just drew it all out,
Paper seems so be the best listener these days,
I can write every thing,
It will never disagree,
Or stop me from saying what I want to say.

The lightning bolts,
The scene hair,
The lyrics,
The broken hearts,
The band names,
The random words.

I wish I were some where,
Some where, where no one can hear me.
Just  to,
SCREAM, every thing away.


Details | I do not know? | |

seconds ago

a few seconds ago millions of people died
many of those no one will ever remember them...
some where babies
cute little angels dying before reaching the polluted air
old people unable to take care of them selfs because they are weak
young people dying because they are using drugs and alcohol because they 
thought mom and dad were lying when they said it was wrong 
Young kids because their parents decide to neglet their hearts
but the worst deaths are the ones that die while they continue living
destroying their family, friends, and the only home they have,
the home in side their hearts....


Details | Ballad | |

Babydoll

Trying to escape from it all I detach from reality Knowing my spirit will be Safe Too much torment have I gone through To know that this story is truly mine Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll In my mind there is a haven Only I can enter, but everyone else is there Its there I will find a new tactic To keep on living in your torment On the way home I'll die a few times But just to know I really lived I'll have to find a new way to bleed If I want to escape I'll have to loose myself Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll Cut me off no matter how much I'll always find a way To fight and survive your kingdom I'm the only thing you desire I'm the only thing you hate I'm the only thing you need I'm you little Babydoll


Details | I do not know? | |

Hurt

pain is not hurt
physical pain is comfort
just ask my leg 
or my arm 
or my stomach
I have gone numb
when you don't feel it anymore
when the physical pain 
just goes away
thats when you are hurt
that is when you have lost
it's hard to go back
from the point so low
you can look up no longer
and see any light
every hour is darkness
every day 
is like night
when tears stop coming
you are left without feeling
except for hurt
tears are relief
when you slice through your skin
but I don't cry anymore about that
I just hurt


Details | Rhyme | |

Last Place

I'm losing my mind at this place. 
All my regrets being thrown in my face. 
My mind is racing. 
I'm starting my pacing. 
Do you mind all my crying? 
Because I know inside I'm dying. 
I'm really starting the shaking. 
I don't give a (beep) if you think I'm faking. 
My skin is aching. 
I know the trouble I am creating. 
This blood is fine. This blood is mine. 
I fear I've gone insane. 
I refuse to refrain. 
The time is changing. 
So why am I still bleeding? 
Am I really there? 
My eyes are empty and bare. 
This pain I feel is so intense. 
It feels like I touched an electrical fence. 
My eyes are stinging. 
My phone is ringing. 
Saw your face. 
Now my eyes sting like mace. 
I quit this race. 
I came in last place.


Details | I do not know? | |

Broken Angel

To all it’s to be spoken
That in one’s chest it lies broken
The soul is shattered
As the cheeks are battered
With tears as some bitter token
Left is an empty shell
Of a person once been
As sudden the End
As this story Begins
She now has wings up in the sky 
We know that rain’s fall is her cry
Her eyes glisten as the stars above
Gazing toward and eternal love.


Details | I do not know? | |

My Suicide Letter

i take ten pills and begin to spin
All the drugs now begin to win
now my wrists are screaming to die
i slide it across without a sigh
feeling this high feeling this rush
watching it bloom with such lush
across again and feeling better
now i begin my suicide letter
I'm sorry mother i let you down again
I'm sorry father where do i begin
I'm sorry brother you were right
now i begin to feel so light
closer now i take ten more
reaching to open deaths door
one more time down my wrist
open my eyes but see a foggy mist
i love you forever i finish my letter
now its over now its better
a light and now a man i see 
I'm in a hospital, you saved me


Details | Lyric | |

What a Lost Soul

Since I am Here The Veil grows Stronger but, You're not here for me I'm just-- Another Lost Soul you know, The people you find on the curbs on streets, During Rainy Days not going anywhere but Deeper into their own Disease but, It's not a disease, for they look for cures for diseases Here the patient cares not Only I could say something like that but since I'm here I just might as well sit on the curb on a rainy day and drown in a new-state-disease what A lost soul I am never enough could satisfy always more What a Lost Soul


Details | I do not know? | |

Virgin's Hindsight

In the deepest blue they shiver - searching her in time
In a lust drawn sigh and quiver – words of intellect and rhyme

Her eyes close in submission – as he draws her further yet
Her soul beats with such sedition – as he helps her to forget

And in the decadence of moonlight - she succumbs to virgin's plight
And in the remanence of hindsight – she never meant to lose the fight


Details | Bio | |

You

You said you loved me
You said you care
You said we will always get through hard times
You said our love will always improve

You promise happy days
You promise that things won't change
You promise you always be here in our older days
You promise that you'll take away the pain

So how could you leave
How could you break the promises you made to me
Why didn't you warn me
I saw no signs of us being apart
Yesterday you kissed my heart

All I have is pictures of you and I 
At our happier times
I remember the times we shared
I remeber the times you cared

Now as I look back 
I see you smileing 
I look at our pictures and kiss them
As I lean over your grave and kiss you


Details | Rhyme | |

Mama

Can you see this pain of mine? 
Buried deep down inside. 
Do you know why it's there? 
Because you never ever care. 
I feel alone. 
Like a puppy lost it's bone. 
I can't find you anywhere. 
Are you sure your really there? 
Am I just a joke? 
A girl to pinch and poke? 
Your the reason for these marks! 
Cutting dawn til' dark. 
My brain has frozen. 
Why have I been choosen? 
Mother you lie! 
You said I'd never die! 
Mama, it wasn't murder and I'm not homicidal. 
Mama, this was intentional because I am suicidal.


Details | I do not know? | |

Pain Adventure

Even though, no one notices the pain, it’s held deep down to keep me sane. 
Many obstacles that life throws at you, Make you wonder what’s all out there. The 
world is big, full of adventure. You can only make it if you have the right stature. 
It’s a long life ahead to live it in till your DEAD.


Details | Rhyme | |

Struggle to the top

his heart is poetic
yet he regrets it
for respect he sticks his neck out its life and death kid
he give's words depth and yet his soul hasn't left
running out of breath
feels like hes been punched in the chest
he knows he's cursed but he knows hes blessed
misery and obsession lead him to success of his first lesson
always keep the opposition double guessing
and if he could make a suggestion
Dont come to close he fires like a smith a wesson
but dont be scared hes just hurt from the last person he let in


Details | I do not know? | |

To Never Come Back

Insults echoing in my ears
The ones that dripped from the lips
Bloody tears mark my cheeks
As the blade tembles in fingertips
Nothing seems quite fair
As I hide behind my hair
Pitied by all
Looked over by most
Loved by none.
Quietly I scream in my head
Let me sleep
And never awaken from my bed.


Details | I do not know? | |

This Needle This Life

This needle, this life
We fight to get a fix
It lasts a short while
Theres no more, its time

We hunt them down
Stealing here and there
We need this needle
Injected in our veins

It feeds us engery
It gives us pleasure
More, More, we need
Its all gone....more

It ruins our family
Our friends turn their backs
We dont care
All we need is the needle 

The herion, the weed
The crack, its all life
Its all that loves us
And we love it to death

This needle, this life
Followed us to our grave
So where is this needle now?
Still stuck in our veins


Details | Ballad | |

Didiane Le Vie

 
I need to feed my hunger is never satisfied I need your attention please notice me My emotions are bare, so I crave yours 'Tis a painful obessesion that leaves me wanting more It goes on over and over Till I find my mark I'm synthetic and cold nothing inside Woe I am, is all I feel I'll try forever till im dead But I cannot be dead-- for only your blood will be shed Take away this horrid price But painful immortality doesn't fail I'm always on the hunt For a new host to feed You emotions are mine The sacred blood of life is all I need to survive I'm always in an enternal war To fill the painful obessesion Your attention and emotion is all I need Im the synthetic vampire I can't feel anymore I was made by a blood-thirsty whore Who wanted war and death All I wanted was to be real Only you are my mark I'll gain all your attention Capture your emotions Just love me even though I cant love A creature of the dark I was made to tear everything apart I'm always on the hunt For a new host to feed You emotions are mine The sacred blood of life is all I need to survive I'm always in an enternal war To fill the painful obessesion Your attention and emotion is all I need Im the synthetic vampire (love me and love me and love me and love me and love me and love me) I'm always on the hunt For a new host to feed You emotions are mine The sacred blood of life is all I need to survive I'm always in an enternal war To fill the painful obessesion Your attention and emotion is all I need Im the synthetic vampire


Details | Couplet | |

Breaking Point

My best friend is gone, Ended her life
Turned around and she cut herself with a knife
Body lain, Soaked in blood in the bathroom tub
Why did she have to join the suicide club?
Kassidy's gone, I dont know what to do
My other friend Savannah, Im pretty sure she's gone too
Got a knife, got depressed, and cut her vein
Why is this happenin? Girll you were my main!
Left me all alone just to bite the dust,
God d*mn this f*ck*n life's a bust
Cheated on everytime left and right,
Can't one girl be faithful for a night?
Haha my friend has a british accent, so cute
You have a gun? Point it at me.Click, Shoot
In December i really hope this world will end,
Because of everything my heart has too many hole to mend.


Details | I do not know? | |

Misconception

Forever seen, the sky so dim. 
I wonder hopelessly in till the end
Searching for my hearts mend
Staggering along what seems so slim
The sky turns red
As time flows, down like water
Into the road.
Screams are hard to come across these days
But is it I, the one to say, "I love you."

So I sit, making the choice
Should I be that rebel or rejoice!
Its hard for me to ease the pain, or ever
Refrain to take me away. 
So all I have is your voice and pictures
Staggered on the wall
And I make the blisters, pop and ooze
Stressed and confused
I don't know what I should do
All I know is "I want to see you."

So now I wait, tomorrow is near
I will be leaving to see my fear
He was all, he was everything, He is what made me.
But now he’s gone
And now i’m lost
Theirs only a path
That leads to my moth
Flying high in the sky, beauty lays deep down inside
My plans has made a war in my head, I'm sorry for all that I’ve said. 
Over coming this will change me now
So I must go and claim that sound.
Sound of fear, and death, loneliness and stress
I’m going up their for the best
Then "us" will come, and it will be good.
Still I wait for that time to come, touching your skin, so closely snug
Me and you doing what we love. Some day we will meet

                     But can I handle it?


Details | I do not know? | |

Wasted Innocent

Cold 
In the eyes of the innocent
Mom in the corner trying to breathe
Ribs cracked
Lots of screams
Save me from this awe full dream

Leaky sealing’s 
Broken Tiles
Shattered glass 
A run down mess
Broken home
And empty homes

Facing evil
Getting older
Where does their life go
When they waste it alone 
Going on the street
Getting colder


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost Children and Babies

My heart feels constricted, breathless pain,
the homeless child, shall never gain.
My fingers stumble when reaching out,
humble feelings trembling with doubt.

My lifeblood's flow, has been denied,
listening as the lost children cried.
My hopes dashed, and thrown away,
like some unborn status played.

Dismembered, fetus of living hell,
from warmth, a lost child did dwell.
Encased in their own veil of sorrow,
no hope yesterday, today, or tomorrow.

Reach the ends of the neap's moonlit tide,
possess the young, unwed child bride.
My heart won't span the broken hours,
wombs of waste, lost wilted flowers.


Details | Lyric | |

Everything She's Ever Wanted

The greatest guy she's ever met
     The best friends she could ever have
          The most supportive father imaginable
     People who believe in her
And the most wonderful dreams.
     Great achievements
          Amazing support
     Huge happiness
And a lot of love.
She's got everything her little heart desires.
     It's just too bad
               she's too dead to feel it all.


Details | I do not know? | |

unknown life

Standing still 
Taking every little pill
Falling down, to the ground
Not making a sound

Shocks of pain blow through my brain
The codine yet strains and wanes the pain
I open my eyes, to my surprise
Everything flashes by, 
Mom, dad, my brother, friends, family, trista, Sam, memories, wishes...
My life, everything was so perfect.
I didn't even expect it.
_________________________________________________


Details | Elegy | |

Last Thought

The asphalt against my face
Sirens in the background
My fresh warm blood censuring my eyes
Over whelming feelings of regret and remorse rush through my mind
What am I to do in the last moments of my life?

To lay here and cry or to quietly die
Or to scream for help or to fade in the night
Wish for a new start or to pray for what I had.
What about my mom and my dad?

How are they going to take it without me by there side
I didn't get to say good bye or tell them how much I loved them both.
They should now that I will always be there with them.
I don’t want them to be sad, they should be mad, I made the selfish choice.

Having them by my side would make this better
To have my dad tell me “Its okay son we all make mistakes”
Or my mom to say “I can relate to how you are feeling, and that it will be okay”

But it won’t, because I’m feeling my hopes and my dreams all slipping away
Like a leaf falling off a tree on a windy autumn day.


Details | Ballad | |

Nothing More to Say

Everyday is constant despair
my life is full of pain
no one else seems to care
i think I'm going insane

my heart is now broken
my veins torn and bare
so many words unspoken
because no one is ever there

my world is now shattered
my life torn apart
nothing else matters
only loneliness in my heart

so someone tell me why
i should live my life this way
for all i want is to die
theres nothing more to say!


Details | I do not know? | |

Curious and mysterious

I sit here staring into the sky, watching my life pass me by.
Mysterious, yet curious of what it holds for my future. 
Shinning bright, hoping for the flight to be over
But still I promised, I loved. 
My goals are reachable
My stories are with no ends
The beginning has just started
For all who had departed
From this mysterious, curious life that we live
I still stand here watching you!

My mind shoots like the stars, glows as bright too
So many things have change day by day
But why can't I?
I’m lost, confused. Still its all i have to live for
Everyday I feel like i'm falling
But then sometimes I feel like i’m on even ground
This bumpy road we call life
Has changed over time
Yet everything fades
Deep into that black hole into the sky
Shinning bright, glowing so high
What’s all out there are you watching me?
What has this done, what have I done
I worry. Curious, and mysterious. 


Details | Ballad | |

Forsaken Eurydice

[Satyr]
A quick game is all it will be
I can tell you can hear my shouts and screams from forest 
Your home it beckons thee
Why won't you come and play with me?
 
Why cant you cure her?
The venom isn't too deep
If you could awaken her once
Cant you do it again
 Did sorrow blind you?
 
 [Orpheus] 
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be 
For I have forsaken my Eurydice 
 
 [Persophone] 
He will never listen 
No is all you will hear
Death is always the killer of love
Death will always win
 
 [Hades] 
Go back to your kingdom
My words have been proclaimed
Your music will not be able to charm
 
 [Persophone] 
Why don't you please
Give him his love
He went this far in vainI
f he cannot see her blank face
Wont why you please
 
  [Orpheus]
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be
 For I have forsaken my Eurydice
 
 [Hades]
If it will please
You can see her
Only without your eyes
Throughout the dark realm
Looking back will forsaken your Eurydice
 
  [Orpheus]
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee
Why I not could listen to the dread king
All the life to you I could bring
I had to look back with eyes of dismay
Eurydice Eurydice how mortal death has forsaken thee 
Music no more will there be
 For I have forsaken my Eurydice


Details | I do not know? | |

At least I won't hurt you anymore

I sit in the dark blameing myself for all the pain I've caused you,trying to figure out 
a way to make it better,but my mind is blank.I stand with a knife in my hand so 
done with life.I feel the blade slice through my skin.I collapse to the floor 
sceaming in pain .At least I won't hurt you anymore.


Details | Blank verse | |

Red Rose Petaled Bath

Red rose petals in the bathtub of scented dripping water,

Candles gently flickering in the background,

Sending an iridescent glow throughout the bathroom,

Soft melodies can be heard from a distant room.

Why is it so sad?

A naked body stands in front of a fogging mirror,

A tear trickles down a wet cheek,

Sadness weeps through those glistening eyes,

A chin quivers and sighs,

Inside the sound of a weak heart can be heard,

Thumping loudly,

Ringing in the ears,

Boom – boom, boom – boom, boom – boom,

Why is it so loud?

A hand reaches down onto the counter by the sink,

Grabs a hold of something and draws it up,

Those sad eyes take one last look into that fogging mirror, and shut tightly,

The blood starts to drip so fast,

Down the arms,

Onto the sink, floor and feet,

Fear, panic, dizziness overwhelming,

 

Into the red rose petal bath,

Odd – the water turns so dark,

The red so vibrant,

Why is blood red?

Slipping into incoherence,

The fear is gone, panic disappeared,

Falling now – maybe floating,

Until;

There is no more,

Why is that so ironic?


Details | Quatrain | |

IN MEMORY OF BRENNAN

So full of life
With a cute little grin
Every girls dream
Each heart he could win

Riding bikes around
And playing with his dog
He would take him out
For a short little jog

When he was at school
He would talk about cars
He would think about planets
And how to count stars

Boy Scouts was a passion
His LIFE badge he earned
Now that is not something
That is easily learned

His life was cut short
But his memory will stay
Embossed in our hearts
Forever, day after day

So, let us remember
His laughter, his love
His jokes and his pranks
As he watches above


Details | I do not know? | |

don't do it.

dont do it too deep.
dont do it so close.
dont do it too low.
dont do it so short.
dont do it so edy.
dont do it so off.
dont do it that light.
dont do it that far.
dont do it that hight.
dont do it that long.
dont do it that clean.
dont do it...
like that.


Details | Rhyme | |

Jesus NOT Drugs Is Our Hope

There was a time when I felt 
lonely and forsaken.
Everything I had was either gone or taken. 

 I lost all hope and had no place to stay.
Just trying to get through another day.

I thought that drugs would give
 me what I needed.
The "danger signs" in life... I no longer heeded.

I learned about "joints" and "tricks."
All I lived for...  was another "fix."

I felt no right or wrong. 
 No guilt or shame.
Then one night... An "angel of mercy" came.

"Jesus loves you!" Were whispered into my ear.
Without help soon.  I knew death was near!

This "angel" gave me a 
place to rest my head.
He seen to it that I was clothed and fed.

His words were filled with 
a message of hope.
I soon gave up all of my drugs and dope.

This "angel of God," gave me an invitation.
And soon I received God's gift of salvation.

I traded me "ashes" for God's
 mercy and grace.
I now have joy in my heart & 
a smile on my face.

God's love can do what no 
drugs could ever do!
He's here right now... and is waiting for YOU!


By Jim Pemberton
01.14.07


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Die Another Day

When I dig down far within my mind. All I can find is suicide. Can’t say why I want 
to die. Probably to escape the pressure inside. The neglect I receive and the pain 
I conceive. It’s eating away all parts of me. Only god knows how tired I am of 
crying, and how hard I am trying to cover up the lying. I can’t even explain why o 
feel this pain. My eyes just cry, the rain that stains the face that bleeds for a place 
in the human race. And incase I say things turn out my way I think I’ll pray to die 
another day.


Details | Free verse | |

Last Drop Of Red

Follow light to every wrong turn
Let it slip and watch it burn
You've bid the blood and spilled the pain
Now break the trust and cut the vein
Be nothing more and nothing less
Kill the cold and cross the stress
Feed the lies
Lose the fire in those eyes
Running crimson
Now you know what you've done
Let everyone down
Lay dieing, soak the gown
I last remember my tower of mistakes
Drained of red tears and chased away by all the fakes


Details | I do not know? | |

Maybe Death

The knife against my wrist, 

It feels so cold like ice,

But the warmth of my blood,

Seeps out the sides in the first slice.

 

It caresses my body,

The feeling surrounding my every muscle,

Calming me.

 

But then you came.

The pain slowly came to a halt,

The blade disappeared,

The blood stopped flowing, it’s own small vault.

 

I felt my eyes open, 

For the first time in so long,

The calmness of the pain leaving my body,

And turning into pure happiness that it could never feel wrong,

 

A warm cloud encircling my body,

Your presence all I need,

When I feel the pain arise,

Again like the times before,

All I need is to look into your bright brown eyes.

 

Never again am I afraid,

To worry about where life will take me,

You pulled me out of a world of black,

And now I’m just plain happy.

 

I will never let you go,

You are my hero.

 

To my true love,

I will never let you go.


Details | Blank verse | |

My Life

My life is like a dark pool of black

Nowhere for me to turn to nowhere for me 

to turn to.

Lost and lonely I wonder is this my life? 

Is this what I live for?

What is the meaning of life!

So i cut a picture in my body reminding me 

what it feels like to feel pain!

But as i lay there bleeding in my mind and 

in my room I hear God calling to me.

Telling me that he is there I think it's 

my imaginasion playing tricks on me!

I Yell out IS THIS MY LIFE LET ME DIE!

But in the end that was my life


Details | Blank verse | |

End It All!

The anger is building deep inside,

So much pain is hard to hide,

Dieing inside,

Just me trying to swallow my pride,

Simple minded people here and there,

Wasting my time and my space,

The thought of a razor blade never seemed so right,

Until tonight,

I had never thought of ending it all,

Being ready to fall, 

But not ready to crawl,

Just ready it end it ALL! 


Details | Blank verse | |

Untitles 2

Sheltered lives and hollow minds, 

How much simplicity can this life hold?

Wondering thoughts and heart too heart talks,

Complicity!

Solem vows,

Tyrant howls,

Argumentive!

A world of light and one of darkness,

The crow watches eyes as black as the darkest abyss,

Scapegoat!

Silver Twilight here and there,

As if no mortal soul will ever return,

Sudden Death!


Details | I do not know? | |

untitled

I'm drunk now...
Hardly write at all
But any more it's all I do
To rid the memory of the skank I screwed
Then she came back so unforgiving
To kill me again
And hold the pen I will
To stab her heart with a vengence
Scribbles turn to scrolls
As my face becomes numb
Then I turn violent, territorial
Destroying friendships after shots
And making alliances before death
My hate grows stronger after I bang
Then my anger gets even larger
My violent ways grow
As my alcoholic words seem to decimate
All whjat is and was
All I think about is what's now
Not later or gone
Everything has become habitual
After killing so many who can blame me
666 is the number for worship
But rebellion is all for me
Though I still create death in mind
I reek of smoke of burning bodies
My revenge will be met
And my death mte after theirs'
Whiskey and beer influence
These thoughts, so random
Yet hunger overcomes drunkeness
Then I cut, drink and fall again


Details | I do not know? | |

Fatal Cut

I sit here thinking that this is the last thing ill write in my life. But is this all worth it. 
Is it too late? I did it, I made that cut. I took those pills. And now my life is spilled 
out on the floor. I sit here holding that cloth over that cut, I’m tying to get it to stop 
bleeding, I would look but I scared to see the damage that I did. As I grow fainter 
and lighter I’ll know that I did the damage that I wanted to do. Its only time now 
before we know. The cloth now is getting heaver with blood and my head is 
getting a taste of the codeine. The key are now spotted with the blood from the 
tips of my fingers. I’m now alone in this house. No one to claim me in till the 
morning. By then I’d have sent out that warning. I’m now feeling faint and week, 
dizzy and lost and confused. I’m scared, what have I done? I feel as if death has 
won. The blood is running down my leg from that cloth that covered it up. I’m 
going to go wash it now in the tub. So in till we meet again.


Details | I do not know? | |

Dyeing

As I lay dyeing, I spoke your name.
I asked where you were but you never came.
Would you care if I died?
Would you sit and cry?
or move on without a tear? Some things I'll never know,
As I lay dyeing.


Details | I do not know? | |

GOD

He stays up in the sky 
watching his land
Perfecting the light

He makes everything good to go
Just don't look down,  and you will know.
Listen to him, gave him praise
He'll help you out on the darkest days.

i believe in Jesus Christ
Died on the cross for use to go right
He him self roase again. 
He put us all in his big hand.

Now we need to spread the word
Jesus christ is out bird
Flying over, watching us all
Deciding if were are allowed in the christ mall.
Many people come and go, they leave this earth, its hard to let go

And when my time comes, its not far
Ill let him know how we are.
In the sky flying around, ill look down
at you on the ground.

I will help you through those times.
Just i hope you understand all of this ryme.



Details | Elegy | |

The Pain of Your Death

I sit alone
In the darkest corners of my room
Behind my eyes i silently cry
As i watch my world crumble to the floor
I no longer sleep softly in my bed
I can't breathe the steady rhythm i once did
My heart doesn't beat normally like before
I can hear it pounding inside my chest  
louder and louder it beats
My emotions become possessed
By the pain that wraps its bitter arms around me
As I feel dozens of tears pour down my face
I know my life will never be the same...
Without you


Details | I do not know? | |

Infection

I was a junky once...
Shooting up is like a disease you have control over,
but can't stop fueling
You get higher and higher and you always fall twice as hard
You can feel pieces of your mind, body, and soul floating away into the sea of 
addiction
With every shot you lose a little more hope
Every empty needle is another broken dream
In the beginning you see it as being crazy and obscure,
just like anyone else judging from the outside
It's amazing how quickly it becomes a familiar and normal part of your lifestyle
It's a part of you, just as important as breathing, 
if not more
Even if you do get out alive,
everything inside of you is dead
You slowly start to resume the routines of your life before the sickness,
but it can never be the same
It haunts you in your dreams
It laughs at you in your nightmares
It call for you when you least expect it
And your veins cry back for it like an infant to its mother,
begging you to take the pain away
Time will go by
You'll feel close to human again
But the random shakes and aches will always remind you of the demoralizing 
underworld you were once a part of...
...and in some ways, 
you'll always be a part of.


Details | Blank verse | |

Our Measly Sums

What if this was heaven
And I had just forgotten?
I must have died a slow smooth death
And reached the end 
In hopes to find a simple God
But was rewarded with the simple life.
If this place is over-dramatized,
Then fear and anticipating waits for me
Behind your begging and bright eyes.
This intimacy is beyond our control
And could hold great depth beyond such thoughts
That fixing your hair in the morning is no longer
The normal and half hearted example of daily routine.
Now changing the sheets is no longer a chore
And breaking hearts is now as comfortable
As driving long distance.
Keeping this ivory dress as white
As it has been all my life,
Has become as hard as dirtying it.
What would I say
If I was asked of my favorite sense?
Would I ever have a reply?
Would you need one with the look behind my eyes?
Watch these broken hearts beat
As if they were whole to begin with.
Watch her layered skirts swish 
As she sways on your bedroom floor.
Take her like you’ve done before.
Just as you always will.
With it’s unaccredited inevitability,
She’ll watch your faults and falter
While I wallow in each flaw.
I hope one day she keeps you up all night.
Just the way you left me,
Burning in the fall.


Details | I do not know? | |

Come and Gone

Soak me in gasoline
Burn me until my soul is clean.
Spit on my face, grind my teeth
Give me comfort or some kind of relief.
Mad and broken, words unspoken.
The time has come, the gas has soaken
Where the **** is a match or give me a light.
There isnt time to debate wrong from right.
It whispers in my ear the slightest fear
My focus is drained, thoughts unclear.
Am I mad or is this a dream?
Time has stopped, and the demon is seen.


Details | Narrative | |

Second rate beauty queen

When you look at her you wonder,
How can she think like that?
But when she looks at herself in the mirror,
All she sees is the fat.

She claims that she's too busy,
With friends, work, and school.
To sit down for a family meal,
But in reality she simply longs to be cool.

As days go by her body begins to wear and thin,
Her parents begin to wonder if it's too late.
To save their only daughter,
Who's still obsessed with her weight.

Knowing it was time, she left a note that said:
"To all those who were so mean,
And pressured me to be thin. You'll be happy to know,
I died as I lived: A second rate beauty queen.


Details | Free verse | |

Open Wounds

Open wounds on naïve flesh
Open wounds on a broken heart
Open wounds on a dying soul

Open wounds of hate
Open wounds of misunderstanding
Open wounds of neglect

Blood gushes through the open wounds
Trying to heal itself


Wounds made by those that were meant to love
Wounds made by those who did not understand
Wounds made by hate and envy

Raw, open, bloody and gory
Angry and sad

A sacrifice to the unknown force. 
Blood and tears is all it wants

Open wounds that never healed
Open wounds that no one ever saw


Details | I do not know? | |

You throw words out in the moment of anger

What do you see when you look at the blood?
The cuts so deep you can not breathe. 
When you look into my eyes what is it you see?
The pain I've tried to hide from you.
When you look at me, are you disappointed?
Upset with these choices I've made.
When I look at you, I remember your words.
Cruel and heartless, until you knew the truth.
When I look into your eyes I see a fear.
Fear that what you said may be the last thing I hear.
When I look at you I see past the anger.
I no longer look there for the answer.
Where I find what I'm looking for, 
Can only be seen when you look through the doors.
I find your heart, and look into it.
What you say and what you feel, 
Unable to make sense of it all, 
You throw words out in the moment of anger.


Details | Free verse | |

To a mother from a daughter

a butterfly, a rainbow, a shooting star,
a brick, a rock, a slit throat,
blood, bruises and lies
a Father's fist, a mother's cry,
a child hides...
a butterfly, a rainbow, a shooting star,
pathetic, pain, and worries
a daughter's cry a mother's scream
ALONE, no one on this team,
a reason? None
a butterfly, a rainbow, a shooting star
good thoughts get buried and drowned in the ocean of life
while the clouds of life create a storm,
hearts get torn,
this becomes the norm
a butterfly, a rainbow, a shooting star
a brick, a rock, a slit throat
too many reasons to die
not enough to live...

          Sincerely,
                          a daughter


Details | I do not know? | |

Will You Watch Me Die?

I’m lost in here.
I am so alone.
Please come to me so that I don’t die alone.
Just to see your face would ease my pain.
Without you here, it’s not the same.
I’m stuck in a storm at sea.
With nobody on shore to guide me.
I’m running to save my life,
But there’s nobody here to hide me.
I’m crushed beneath the waves.
My life is crashing on the rocks below.
As I lay here dying,
Please come to my side.
They say true love is watching as the one you love dies.
So please just come to me, 
So I can die knowing, 
Somebody loved me as I died.
So I can die knowing,
Somebody loved me enough to cry.


Details | Rhyme | |

RIP ZAY

As the last bit of snow melts.
The final scraps are washed away.
Nobody really knows the pain felt.
But the sorrow forever stays.
The minute I heard, pain filled my heart.
The minute I heard that you and the world grew apart.
We didn’t know how to take it.
The stories were mixed up.
The pain, we couldn’t fake it.
It remains deep down in our gut.
So when we found out
We didn’t know what to do.
Your ex-girl took it the hardest, she really did love you.
So now all we do is cry.
For the lost friend, an overall good guy.
The loser of his life, all blamed on an accident.
We couldn’t have expected this,for your life to be absent.
But Zay even though your gone, we still love you.
Your gone but not forgotten, your memory stays accrue

                                     RIP ZAY


Details | Free verse | |

Eyes

Eyes,
They haunt me,
As if I were a murderer, 
The eyes of a million victims,
Victims of my self-torture,
Of my self-hate,
Of my lies,
Of the life I’ve been living
Regardless of others,
Regardless of myself.
My reflections distorted
By bloodshed and tears,
I hold your picture close to my heart,
I whisper to my unseeing eyes
I love you


Details | I do not know? | |

Miscarriage of Trust

I was scared for you
of Knowing
Of the life growing
Inside of me.
The life let go
Like a flower on the first fallen snow
I didn't understand why
So I curled up to cry
So scared to tell you
Not knowing what you'll do
now you're mad at me
When all I want to be
Is with you
I care for you
No matter what is said
That's always true...


Details | I do not know? | |

It's only time.

its only time before its all gone.
you never know what will really happen.
My life flashed before my eyes! But when they were closed all i saw was her. She 
was there by my side. She was there healing my mind. I knew she was worried, 
and scared. I just wanted this all to be over with. But when that car hit. I...I was 
gone. Its all what they don't know. That ringing, the sirens, flashing lights, the 
yelling and screaming. Was it me or Jeff??? was it thoses who were helping 
us???  I was gone for 19 hours...i wasn't there. All that laied there was my body. 
My family had hope and so did god! but during my sleep, there was a dream. A 
dream that seemed to last for years. I lived a second life. A life were i was happy. 
A life were i wasn't hurting. The pain and the suffering i had hit me when i woke 
up. I looked around, everywhere!!! but i knew she wasn't there. Scott told me. I 
just wanted to talk to her. but when i did!!! everything seemed to fall back in place. 
Back into my happy place!


Details | Sonnet | |

Suicide Escape

Sitting here listening to voices unclear,
Not knowing why she does what they say,
She sits down and listens in fear,
Holding herself, she will try wishing them away.

She tries to reason with the voices,
She says they’re not really there,
They say she has two choices,
She argues that’s not fair.

Her parents think she’s crazy, they worry that she’s lost it,
It causes too much pain for her to see the tears in their eyes,
They fear that one day her wrists she will slit,
She knows now that they see through her smiling disguise.

Her mind the Devil will rape,
As she plans her sweet suicide escape.


Details | Blank verse | |

Amazement!

I'm standing in a pool of blood,
Where did it come from?

My friends all look in horror,
I laugh. What else can I do?

My wrists are bleeding,
But what can I say?

They rush out for me,
But I pull away.

I look at them with eyes full of hate,
And say"Now look at what you've gone and made me do!"

I lean against the wall,
Falling to my knees.

Their eyes following me,
I cry out in sheer excitement!

I look at my wrists,
I look at them in amazement!

Blood all around me I feel right at home,
No one loves me and I feel all so alone.

When I thought about the meaning of my life,
I realized it was a lie!

No real friends, no family that cared,
Everybody pushed me away !

Now I'm left staring at my wrists in Amazement!


Details | I do not know? | |

R.I.P

As I sat there, in one of my most familiar settings
my mood completely changed gears
but for once it wasn't going downhill
At first, it felt as if I was just numb
almost melancholy, even
but I think it just took a while for the mood to click in my mind
The feeling I was going through was one I hand't experianced in...
...god knows how long
a sense of relief
A cool, soothing calm slowly took over 
I almost smiled
I had gained a tiny ounce of the hope that I lost so long ago
This time
I actually believed in the normal crap 
I usually try to tell myself
I was going to get my stuff together
really make an effort to get my life on the right track
I walked out the door and took a breath
of fresh, pure air
It felt as if a large burden was finally lifted off my shoulders
I walk to the car with the mindframe that 
I can make it through anything...
...The dark, mysterious shadow
that I din't seem to notice
drives away
On the ground
I could tell I only had a few minutes left
if that
I think I still see the cloud of smoke
from the gunshot in the air
but it could just be the haze covering my eyes
I finally smile
"Figures"
The last words I'm able to get out
before my last gasp 
of fresh, pure air
Marcus Jones
R.I.P.


Details | Free verse | |

Senses

Sorrow, despair
Words of hatred, aggressiveness,
Shouting, yelling, 
Crashing, banging.

Sounds, thoughts,
That can be heard by
The senses around the body,
Tears that stream down a cheek.

No other will feel
The way I do,
No other will feel
The pain in a beating heart.

Cheeks, stained
Heart hurt
To trust again
Almost impossible.

Life has never
In the life of 16
Ever been this real
In only the senses of hearing.


Details | I do not know? | |

She died of an overdose

When it all got too much
She would turn to drugs
She could never get enough
the conciquence of he path she chose
No surprise she died of an overdose
She died because she loved a line
It made her worthy every time
The people that she left behind
No solace they can ever find
The conciquence of the path she chose
No surprise she died of an overdose


Details | I do not know? | |

No More

I wish that all the pain would end,
that all the screaming would go away,
Maybe if it all would leave I'd be happier,
And I would have a better life,
All the fights my family gets into just hurt me a lot,
Sometimes I think the only way out is up,
When I keep all the pain in too long,
It explodes out without any warning,
I cry and yell all through the night,
Wishing I could end my life,
All this pain that I go through,
Cuts deeply into my heart,
The pain from the past is left like scars,
They stay to remind me to be careful,
I try so hard to keep me alive,
But the battle is at its end,
One day I'll find true love and peace,
That day will be when my life has deceased,
The pain will leave without a trace,
and the crying will stop,
The last thing to come out of me will be a laugh,
A laugh of happiness and joy,
Something I've always wished for,
The gates will open up for me,
I'll walk towards my new life with no hesitation,
One look back at my what I use to have,
As I walk right in with a smile


Details | Free verse | |

Advice for Jentry

Brother, don’t spend lifetimes
alone sitting staring at electrified screens
or lost adrift in a sea of remorse
hours spent transient blown around like clouds, for
no one knows where you, or I, or our parents’ parents
came from, nor where resides the final resting place of the soul
but that we live, and live for but little
a meal, a warm bed, a fridge, a television
a car, a home, acceptance, joy, love
memories such as these condense and pack ever more tightly to your chest
as time wears on, ‘til by the end all is returned to nothingness
but know that no other man is you, no other life is your own;
may you forge ahead bold through your holy life,
and blaze a trail for lesser men to follow.


Details | Bio | |

What would you do if you could stop me

What would you do if you could stop me?
If you could stop the blade from touching 
My wrist would you?
If you could make me change my mind would you
What would you do if you could stop me
From making the cute the could then my life
Would you stop 
If you saw the blade go
Toward my wrist 
What would you do
What would you do if you could stop me?


Details | Free verse | |

Last Chance

An innocent soul lost in the struggle to fit in
He was a shy kid we all know him
He kept to himself 
Deep inside of him he had the desire to be a 
“cool kid”
Where you are known for partying and drinking
Where you are known for all the wrong reasons
He got his chance the night before graduation
He was invited to the party that would be his annihilation

He lied to his parents he saw no harm in it
He was excited to make his debut
He arrived as the beer was flowing heavy
As the freshman girls where getting giggly
He stood out like white at a funeral
They spotted him the 
“cool kids”
They swarmed him and charmed him
He drank like he had a bottom less stomach
He felt the intoxication hit him like a sledge hammer

He still felt the emptiness
The desire to belong was no longer there
He was vomiting and falling everywhere
They stood around him pointing and laughing
He had to escape this hateful environment
He stumbled into his vehicle
He looked at the "cool kids"
He said screw it
He speed away to an early grave

Everybody whispers at his funeral why him
He was so quite
He was so shy
He just wanted to fit in
He just wanted to be a
“cool kid”!!

bY rudY


Details | I do not know? | |

Forever turning leaf

My parents are yelling, to and fro,
All I do is sit here and wait, for the next scream and shout
My world has torn apart, MY home, MY world
I don’t want any sympathy, cause then I would cry
So many tears, to think so many families go through this fate
I hate this cruel, bitter, twisted world, I hate bitter life
The only reason why I keep going is for my mother
The heart-broken woman, cries for her life back
My father storming out, denying any hate

All I have now is my music, my sweet lulling music
If only I could live and dream my music
The sweet pluck of a guitar and the soothing voice
It understands what I go through, the pain and the agony
I look at baby photos, and even though I remember the every day arguments
I look oblivious and see it as the every day life
Every part of my home will go, the house, lifestyle, the shouting,
The address, to my bedroom I will have to say goodbye
Imagine walking into your house after a normal school day
And walking out knowing your life will never be the same again

Never seeing your bedroom again, never sitting on your sofa again, 
Never walking along your road to the near by shops
Knowing that you can never return
Knowing that your life is not in your hands anymore
I hate the world, I cannot get who I love, lead the life I want
And never see my life again


Details | Free verse | |

Into The Bliss Of Time

Into the bliss of time
Is this where you stand, watching?
I hear the whisper of your soul 
Calling out.

I see you there, standing,
Watching me
A smile so large to comfort worlds
Dancing in the rainbows of lilac.

The world is ours in thought
On clouds and floating high
These beautiful dreams are ours
Of lilac and rainbow
Incessant in the sky.
We chase the stars together
Holding hands as we are
I have three and you have four 
Firestars in a jar.

Back into the bliss you go
Dancing angle
Swirling in the rainbows of lilac
Into the dreams of reoccurrence
Standing, watching.

I will feel your love within
Riding the wings of the zephyr
The beauty of a sister
Holding the heart of her brother.


Details | Haiku | |

Bleeding Too Much

The blood is too much,
I cut my wrists to deeply,
I can't stop this death


Details | I do not know? | |

I killed a teenage boy

(This poem is based on a true event that I read about.)

I live in hell because of a teenage boy who I killed.
He aimed a toy gun at me and I thought it was real.
I thought he was going to kill me so I killed him first.
Tears ran down my cheeks as they put him in the hearse.
For many years I was a very good cop.
I was great at enforcing the law but all of that stopped.
I turned in my badge, I couldn't be a cop anymore.
I can't forgive myself because of what I did before.
It was my job to serve and protect but I failed.
The boy's mother spit in my face and told me that she hopes I go to hell.
They say that time heals all wounds but I don't agree.
If I live to be a hundred, I'll still be in agony.


Details | I do not know? | |

I feel so..

I feel so lost in words and time.
My life is turning toward the ground.
Theres nothing to be found
That can grate that sound
Yelling and screaming as I watch it all fade away
My friend, my life, my soul
Everything changes so fast 
But nothing can be left in the past

Why must this last 
I can't get a grasp 
On the life that I want to have
I feel so lost in pain and suffering
Anger and the stuttering of my mind not knowing what to do

It’s out there to take me away for good
i can't stand being under this hood of darkness that leaves me restless
I'm ready to take the fall, into that cell to get away from you all.
My friends are gone. My life has been stawed upon.

I choked on the lips that kissed that bottle, of pain suffering.
The things that you said, that words that bled out of your mouth
Pushed that knife deeper into the wound. That hole you made that I can't fill
Because I don't have the pills. To ease the pain that will never go away.

My life was my high, my life was my pill.
But all you do is do what ever you can do you make me hate you!!!
Your bring it upon yourself, its all what you asked for.
I've gone through it, and now it’s your turn

Now as I lay here, I burn
In the anger, in the pain and suffering
That you brought upon me.
Everyone will know that you did it.
Everyone will know that I hated it.
It’s all in words that will never be told
Because this is my good bye tone
	
	Goodbye to the life that I lived so unhappily, but there was only one 
person that changed everything. And goodbye to you. Goodbye to my friends, my 
dreams, my writings. Goodbye to the ever changing worlds, Goodbye to the life’s 
of those that are happy. Goodbye to the Music that I loved. Goodbye to the 
mistakes I made and goodbye......


Details | I do not know? | |

rUNNNING WATER

Running Water 

Cold, lonely, fears
Heartache,pain,tears
Abuse, torment all of her years 
Sick of the lies
sick of the guys 
hurts so bad inside 
Samestuff everynight 
Men walk the earth with no souls 
Night after night it takes it toll
Can you hear the running water
Flooding out her cries
Feels nothing when they caress her thighs
Smile on their faces all a facade
They just want her bod
Do they know my age or do they care
what do they fear 
give it up or ya dying (running water)
why you sighing
goes to the building
the place where it all started
She lost her virginity
By some Pimp some scumbag 
Her own father(running water
Runs a tub of running water
 running water
She closes the door ofthe abandonded building
Think about your children
My son is my brother
A  sister mommy
Pills and razor blades 
Drop to the floor
Convulsions
Twisting and turning as she drops to the floor
Even the devil hell'll see this  and feel remorse for
Torn apart
By men with out a heart 
Pray to her maker
To make it end 
Molested at 10
God haven't heard from him since
Make it all go away 
No more pain, no more monsters 
No more tears, no more more ruthless 
virginity-taken by some pimp, some scumbag
Her own  father
Runs to the basement floor
A life even the Devil'll shed a tear for
On the floor-Here's the scence
Walls are lime green
Smells like crap
Straight out of a horror scence
A home not even suiutable to fiends
There a sink and a tub
Pills and razor blades 
Ah Takes out the painkillers
Here eyes fill with so many tears 
Been tring to escape for years
Fills the tub with running water
Tears flow(Running Water)
Silence-pain comes back
Yeah, yeah back back.. to reality 
Wish I was god so I could get a gun & watch em all defy gravity
Gets in a tub of running water 
Puts her head down
Let it flow 
Better than a pill 
Aint no ecstasy
Let em' get the best of me 
Nothing is sound
Silence- 
Death is my escape
Through the flow of running water 


© Amin Aziz 


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

I Wish I Had Listened

I wish I had listened
About my drinking and driving,
Now my best friend is dead
Because I drove without caring or thinking.

I wish I had listened
About drugs and all the kinds,
For now my brain is damaged
I can no longer control my mind.

I wish I had listened
As my parents each night prays,
That I not have unprotected sex
It is to late for now I have aids.

To late I did not listen
For now I have less time to live,
To late because now I am pregnant    
To the innocent child aids I will give.

We are young and think we know it all
We ignore the dangers lurking out there,
We ignore the advice of our parents
We retaliate and just don't care.

Now we pay the prices for not listening
Now we pay with every agonizing breath,
Even though we are still young
Our bodies are worn and nearing death.

We try to blame God for what we have become
Though we know it was by satan that we were deceived,
God tried so hard to teach us right from wrong
Though it was satan to whom we believed.


Details | I do not know? | |

BLEEDING

Bleeding me out of your life
Bleeding me out of my he11
Bleeding the love we once shared
Bleeding and dying here in your bed
Only you can save me now
Stop the bleeding of my heart
But you won’t
So I have no choice but to bleed
Bleeding out of your life
Bleeding out of mine
Bleeding till’ you returned to me
Bleeding waiting here for your
Love


Details | Sonnet | |

An Ending

No one understands what I’ve been through
I have no friends but many enemies 
The pain that I have caused still holds true
Worlds are full of people I am to please. 
The razor blade slides across my wrist
The red liquid drips down my shaking hands
My head convinces me I won’t be missed
My sleeping mind brings me to far off lands.
The end looms nearer as the light grows bright
The pearly gates above stand wide open
St. Peter sees my name and his face light
The gates are waiting and I proceed in.
	Heaven is the place I am to last
	My scar filled wrists remind me of my past. 
	


Details | Free verse | |

Untitled

Pick up the razor.
Are you ready?
Yes.
Place the cold metal on my wrist.
Are you sure?
Positive.
Bring it across.
Does it hurt?
A lot.
My blood drips onto this page.
You happy?
For once.
My blood drips onto tihs page.
And you're out of my life.


Details | Free verse | |

How Are You Doing?

How are you doing
since you gone
I hope life don't get too hard
Since you made sure
mine was hell
The day that our love fell
I thought you actually cared
for all of the love we shared
So how are you doing
since you up and left
without any explanation
thinking i might understand
You know i can't lie
and you knew i would cry
So how are you doing
since you gone?


Details | I do not know? | |

a suicide note

i have come here
just to inform you
im not sorry
for what i will do
 i have no guilt
nor shame
for leaving you
and your game of life.
life holds nothing
nothing for me
atleast no purpose
only misery

im in debt
im in pain
i cry, knowing 
im not sane
cause i see me dead
a gruesome scene
a knife in my throst
and blood walls
the bloodiest of dreams

he will find me
hell call the police
but ill be long gone
still wishing for peace
noone gives a fck
noone will care
while at my corpse
theyll sit and stare
just another fcked up kid
your better off with what i did
i went quiet
i went alone
ive left to find a new home
im with others like me
helpless, lost and alone

i know 
im going to hell
mom..dad
i love you
i jsut cant live like this
im sick of crying
hurting and pieces of me dieing

id feel empty
if not for the rage
and hate pushing me over the edge
so fck you all
you took it away
all that i knew

boy..
fck you
you drove me to this

all of you
could see 
you all knew what was happening to me
you watched me die
lose my mind
so all you fcks

leave your jokes behind
youre all responsible
you could have saved me 
but you didnt care
you never cared

the time has come 
thsi is what i need to do
ill jsut leave
somethng for all of you
i hope you enjoy this 
i wrote it from my heart
this is it
my final word
are you ready for it?
"FCK YOU!"


Details | Blank verse | |

Hold On!

Time is slowly grabbing my tears,

Calling my fears inside my soul,

My body trembles,

My heart no longer beats,

You took me and drug me through the dirt,

Oh!  How much it did hurt,

My soul is burn't,

My eyes cast down in shame,

I am wishing the end was here,

I thought I could be strong,

But I could no longer hold on!


Details | I do not know? | |

Depressed in mind

My life gets harder and stressful everyday
To find the answer why, it’s hard to say
I just sometimes want to close out my life
Just stay in a room alone all to myself
And sleep my life away
I wake up
Feel the same
There are days where I don’t care no more
I just rather shoot myself unto the floor
Like who cares about me
I wish I can see
The way out 
And be free


Details | I do not know? | |

A Drink too Naiive (02/10/2006)

Your eyes tell me a story,
Of a person w/ a secret,
Written over your face,
I wish to ask,
Yet, I shan't pry,
For if I lost you,
My heart would break in two,

You are confused,
I can see,
You do not know,
How I can love,
One such as thee,

We are here,
I clutch your small hands,
Tears flood my eyes,
My vision blurs,
You give me a smile,
You say,
"I promise to return,
My head needs to roll from they gutter,
From which it fell when I saw you,
I will never forget this love I fell towards you."

Over two years later now,
On the news,
A brunette,
Could it be you?
Yes!
Happiness fills me,
Until I realize,
Yet you said you would return and never forget,
Time was too strong,
Two years too strong,
You forgot me,
My love,
I will always love you,
Let this poison in my drink,
Calm my mind and speak to me,
It burns my throat,
As I swallow,
"Farewell my love"
I whisper,
My voice barely audible,
A clone it seems,
From the t.v.
Collapses beside my body,
I feel surprised,
You did not forget,
You were a minute too late,
I was a drink too naiive,
Taking a knife,
You press its tip to your wrist,
You slice it down,
And fall atop of me,
I know for a fact,
Our paths will cross once again,
My eyes growing tired,
They fall shut,
To never open again,
For we both stood beside each other,
At deaths door,
Forever and forever,
I will love you,
Forever and ever,
I will always remember you. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Bloodstains (C)

Red, like the paint on the sheets
the ones that wont let in any heat
the color is bold yet too plain
but the meaning lets out so much pain

Bloodstains on my wrist
Because I made you pissed
Bloodstains on my head
There it is all over my bed

The smell is all over my place 
There is blood all over my face
You hurt me way to much
I can't stand your bloody touch

Bloodstains on the gun
Don't believe what I have done
Bloodstains on my lave
From your bloody fave

You had your chance to stop
You even lied to the cop
You should of yelled
But you never bailed

Bloodstains in my heart 
You ripped it apart
Bloodstains in my mine
You body they'll never find

(poem is copyrighted under my name)


Details | I do not know? | |

Boggyman

It scares us in the dark
It lives under the bed
It is all around us
It loves to feast on fear
Just wait a bit and it will feast on you


Details | I do not know? | |

Boyfriend

Eyes rimmed with tears
Heart pounding fast 
“He’s here” you whisper
You hide from him
Yet you cry out for him
So scared, yet so in love
Why do you do this? 
Why do you care?

He’s here you whispered
But no more are your eyes rimmed with tears

No one can find you 
They all call your name
He’s gone now
He’s gone…

Months later you body is found
Dead in the lake 
Now your washed up on the ground
All mourn your passing 
And it all happened because he was here


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost

My love is lost.
Where did it go?
It vanished like a ghost.
Now in my heart a big hole.

The inside is black,
where it used to be pale.
Love come back!
Please stop this hell.

The outside is green.
envy takes over.
love you are so mean.
I am no longer sober.


Details | I do not know? | |

suicide note

you were the only one that kept me from killing my self , the only reason I even 
stayed here in hell . in the end you’re the reason I sit here in the dark writing this 
poem with the cold gun laying in reach . as soon as I am done saying these last 
few things I need to say . I’ll pick it up, say I love you one last time though you 
wont hear it and pull the trigger . finally saying goodbye to this world . I’ll leave you 
knowing that I loved you with all my heart, body and soul . don’t worry though, you 
released me . I wont feel any more pain . the only pain I’ll feel wont last too long . 
not nearly as long as the pain that I would feel if I was to stay alive . they say the 
greatest pain of all is a broken heart . guess I wont have to find out for too 
long .so this is my goodbye ….


Details | Free verse | |

She writes down her woes

I reach for a breathe 
But theres nothing to grasp
It chokes my slowly 
As the blood is caught up in my
Throat

This cut gets deeper 
As I run the blade agianst my wrist
At first it felt as if I was someone
Because I wasnt to late to change
A horrible mistake

I open my eyes finally
The blood everywhere 
It haunts me as the cut never heals
I get scared and start to belittle myself

It was not my desicion
To take this knife to my wrist
But it was my little voice
The taunts my mind

Suicide diaries of a young girl 
That can bring a man to his knees
Cries out for help in the only way she can
She writes down her woes


Details | Free verse | |

Defeat

i hate this life that was put
in front of me
i walk...
then i trip time and time again
each time always harder
to live with
this time i trip but i don't get up
this fall came quick and painful
pushing a realization into my head
each time i get up i always fall
faster and harder then the last
time
only this time i'm going to lie here
till my body gives
i've already let go mentally
so it won't be long
till i completly shut down
since there is nothing to keep 
me here
i will give in to the darkness
i close my eyes desprately
not wanting to look back
i'd just walk into the darkness of
defeat


Details | I do not know? | |

Waiting Scared

I see him,
Waiting for me.

I am scared,
Wanting to stay.

I'll fight hard,
Try not going.

Time's my opponent,
It will win.

When it does,
We will meet.

He'll take me,
What was mine.

Death won't care,
How I feel.

His works done, 
When I'm gone.

But for now,
still He waits.


Details | I do not know? | |

i dont even know what i should title this

Save the best for last
No
I’ll save the best for the rest
All the ones that want to know 
They want to know why?
That’s the inevitable question
And the topic of debate
The shut gate
Pops out of the silhouette in my mind
that’s where the graveyard
Where all the dead things go
All the lost hopes
And failed attempts to try
And as water pours from 
A hazy view
All I can see is the gate
Mocking me
Haunting me
Screaming at me to unlatch it 
And turn the key and just walk in
Walk in on the ground with bare feet
As the rocks and twigs
Sink into my skin
I’m planting roots 
I see a grave 
Yet its unmarked
It has no name 
And I rest my head 
To uncover the same


Details | I do not know? | |

Missing you

All the happy days fade away
I miss you more then these words can explain
I imagine life as if  you were still here
As I wait for your face to appear
You are the wind whispering in my ear,
The arms holding in my fear
The anguish of your memory bleeds through the skin
Through the clouds, your smile stands out, that unforgettable grin
Reality seems so far away
Your gone forever, or so they say
Is forever really that distant?
Perhaps only in my mind, your spirit is existent
This pain has grabbed me and won't let go
The tears slowly begin to flow
Reality is starting to reel me back in,
As the walls surrounding me begin to spin
And i still don't know why,
Why, in just a blink of an eye,
It was suddenly time to say goodbye


Details | I do not know? | |

Emotions are hard to control

Nobpdy seems to understand 
what i am truly going through
All the hurt and pain in my heart
Yeah people do listen but they will never
truly understand what i'm going through

My dad has broken y heart too many times
yet people still expect me to let him do it again
I can't! I have to be strong

I thought I could cope with loosing Uncle mike
Scott made things easier to take in
But I nearly lost him too
I can't cope on my own, I need Scott

Nobody will understand the connection their is betweem us
Only Pat seems to realise that I really do care about him

Nobody seems to understand
what I am going through
All the hurt and pain in my hears
Yeah people will listen but they will never 
truly understand what I'm going through.

My emotions are hard to deal with
and I can't cope for much longer!!


Details | I do not know? | |

Drip....

Drip....
There go the tears of a thousand years
The pain of a nation in loss
The sadness of children seeing death
The fear of living no matter the cost
As all this flows away
My life goes astray
Along with the boy with the gun
As I wonder why 
I was ever born
Drip....


Details | I do not know? | |

Urban Manifestation

If we looked hard enough we could see.

Something going on daily in the shadowed areas of the country.

This routine.

This time it's a man who cannot feed his seed.

Welfare and food stamps cannot suffice, you see.

And the nine to five is sucked dry before a penny can be spent freely.

Screamed and screamed, this his seed, did proceed.

Leaving this man tired and weary.

For this man did not know how to quell his baby's crying and in any way help.

Ambient circumstances drove this man to seek a temporary wealth.

Even if that meant taking away another man's health.

He excommunicated himself from himself.

So he didn't take a second to pump the brakes and stop the confrontation.

Now the police are calling confirmation of a body bag, all because of a righteous 
hesitation.

And so ends another living gestation.

Another life lost, and another closed casket funeral reception.

How can there be hope when gunplay is the latest sensation?

How can we keep dreaming in a country that needs rehabilitation?

But, despite the protesting and demonstrating, we find our selves with a lack of funds.

So we resort back to guns.

These are not puns, this viscous cycle, this American menstruation.

With death as the only compensation.

And a people hoping they wont be the next star of the church congregation.

With this fear, only spreading the urban manifestation.


Details | Burlesque | |

Death in a Stairwell

I couldn’t wait to eat lunch with you tomorrow
But now my heart is filled with sorrow
The world has violently taken you away
I watched as you crashed to the stairwell floor
As your innards were sprawled all over the tile
The red stain will remind me of this cursed night
The night your life was ended
I just wish our time together wasn’t so brief
It is filling me with grief,
As I think of the memories we will never be able to share
I can barely take the thought of you not being there,
When I awake in the morning
So I will stand here in mourning
I will grieve over this world’s loss of ageless beauty
I will grieve over my loss of the one I dreamt of tasting in sweet bliss
I will grieve over you, the one I am sorely missing
I just wish I knew “why?”
Why cruel world?! Why?!
What did my sandwich ever do to deserve to die?


Details | I do not know? | |

BLOOD

Blood red sky
Crimson glinting
Hoping to flow
From the body which wish to die
Pale and white
From the loss of blood
Thick and dark
Escaping one’s wrist
To the once white tiles
Body and blood
Both leaving its home
Of life


Details | I do not know? | |

No escape

I'll spread my wings 
Spread them and fly
Fly to a world unknown to adults
A world well known by children
As I take off to fly my wings of childhood get riped off
An invisible force is pulling me down 
Down down down I go to the harsh realty
Down to a place of pain and sorrow a place of work 
I close my eyes tight to escape the world
Now I feel calm 
Now I feel safe
I open my eyes to see that it's too late
I've been sucked in to the harsh realty
The realty known as life
I now realize that this is no escape 
There is no way for me 
To be the child that I want to be


Details | I do not know? | |

Because i loved you

tears stream down my face
tears of pain
tears of agony
tears of love... for you
my only love 
you have abandoned me 
and left me here to die
my crystal clear tears have stopped flowing
and now are replaced my red ones
i no longer cry for you at night 
i no longer feel love for you,
you left me here to die
and i just want to let you know
it is your fault for my blood to flow
like tear drops to the cold ground
i loved you 
i trusted you
and you left me 
i gave you my heart 
you gave it back broken
but now the red tears have stop flowing
no more shall the cold hard earth catch my tears
and it's all because i loved you 


Details | Rhyme | |

I'll Take You Down With Me

No-one knows I was lying
When I said I was trying
Another way out to see,

So if you feel like crying
Or a little like dying
Then just don't come to me.


Details | Elegy | |

Missing You

I want to say I'm sorry,
I'm sick of all the questions,
My heart is tearing in two,
because I miss you,
I'm sorry for what I said,
I hate all these unanswered questions,
that I never told you,
I'm sick of all the lies I spread,
even though none were about you.

I want to say I'm sorry,
I'm missing you so much,
this loss I must now endure,
and as I write this poem,
I write all my feelings down,
I'm not crying,
I never have,
must I must say just one thing,
if I can't say anything else,
I love you,
and always have.

I want to say I'm sorry,
my dearest great-grandma,
how can somebody so young as me,
possibly handle this loss?
I'm only twelve years old,
well, I'm almost thirteen,
but still I'm young not old.
I don't know how to handle this,
I don't know what to do,
I've never cried before in memory,
but that doesn't mean I don't feel sad.
I love you Nana!


Details | ABC | |

THE BATTLE OF DESPERATION

Where do I put my hate at the end of the day?
Who will save my soul when I forget to pray? 
How do I fall asleep at night? 
When all I want to do is fight! 

Who can I love when my love has gone away? 
Why can't I be the man that would make her want to stay? 
I rip my mind apart like the blade rips the flesh. 
At the end of the day my head is a bloody mess. 

I don't slip cause I won't get up from a fall. 
I am losing at life's game so I am left to ball. 
They laugh at my demise cause they can't resist. 
So I know when my body expires, it won't be missed. 

The cold flesh will become a bone frame. 
No one will ever look at me the same. 
I will fall and your tongue will cause the slip! 
Your bottle of pain is not the same as mine, just a sip! 

Get drunk and high off my misery. 
Spit it, suck it, slam it, then let me be. 
I am a sinner so throw your stone. 
Make your hatred known and then leave me alone! 

My soul is not worth saving any more. 
This battle has ended and I am done for! 

I do not need to sleep at night! 
I can fight a war with out any sight! 
My love is gone and gone for good! 
She did not love me and I know now she never would!


Details | Elegy | |

She's Gone

I'm shedding tears just thinking
Of all the beers she is drinking
There goes one, two, three, now four
She stumbles to the car and opens the door 
Im screaming as I watch her go
I hate it when she drinks but I'd never let it show
That night I went to bed not thinking
I'd be waking up to hear she's dead.


Details | Lyric | |

Done to Me

Look at what you’ve done to me
it’s so hard to even breathe
if I could chisel ice off your stare
I’d still be stuck inside this miserable winter
you said it would be over soon
but I’m still trying to make it through
I’ll lay here
I’ll do my best to die
I’ll stay here away from you
so that your piercing eyes
can’t stab right through me
Do you want me to bleed?
Do you need me to disappear?
Well give it time, have no fear
I’ll be gone by the end of this year
I’m headed straight for Death
As where I am is about the same
I’m so screwed up and I blame you
for leaving my mind so lame
You ran away that bleak, dark day
and I could not find any peace
And it’s the least that I can do,
so I’ll stay away, away from you


Details | Free verse | |

Butterfly Love

She stares at a grave marker
A solid marble angel holds a plaque that reads
"With the wings of an angel I am set free"
With a tear she remembers 
She remembers the night she heard those words
As they spilled from her lover's lips
That was the night her life ended
The night he ended his misery and left this world
That night she decided she would follow him
She whispered in his ear these words that still ring true
"Love is like a butterfly
Hold it too tightly it will be crushed
But hold it too loosely and it will fly away
So before you love first learn to hold a butterfly"
Now tears stream down her cheeks
As she whispers so quietly only her angel can hear
"You will forever hold my butterfly"
With a tear she closes her eyes never to open them again


Details | I do not know? | |

The 1st puff is the killer

If you don’t take the first puff
You’ll have nothing ever to miss
No loss or longing, no harm done at all

But if you take that first puff
I know that you will start to crave
A longing for more when it’s not always there

I wish you had never entered the scene, my world, my life
So then I would not have withdrawal effects from you
And I would not be in the know of your existence

Leave me now, to stop increasing pain
Leave me now and never return
Let me lead my life again


Details | I do not know? | |

Sweet Revenge

I appear with a smile at your call
I'm your faithful servant
At least that's what you think
But my cheerful smile is just a ploy
That hides my true thoughts
The ones of a sweet revenge
You think that I worship you
You think that I love you 
That's what will make it so sweet
When I stand over you
With a knife in my hand
And a smirk on my face


Details | Haiku | |

Hollow Life

No shining light stares,
all there is, is cold blackness,
my cold hollow life.


Details | Free verse | |

to answer is to remove all beauty from the question

the embodiment represented a mixture of emotions. touch &
sight & taste (you must be joking) -- belief in the primitive 
concept of merely 5 senses is absurd(reverberates against  
infinity,each echo whispers 'distance')distanced from the sanctity
of legality by choice ;&punishment they give so dutifully,all 
wearing the same drooling mouths- we take it gratefully/laugh
hysterically ,,which begs the question of Who is fooling Who
?    : geography was drawn only seconds before our fall
into gravity, & upon our every delicate crash, it smeared &
lost all intentions.            "it doesn't have to be like this"
medicated by the dark withered hand that has slipped inside
my ear that has my brain clenched in its fist. tolerated through 
the fear of loss [i need ineed] 
the brain is merely intellect is but an organ that will die just
like you(r body -----kaput) bang BANG choochootrain gone
insane, please get out of the rain /forwhat/    "well, i thank
they beautiful with they distant eyes- sho must be nice havin
each day a surprise"


Details | Narrative | |

Untitled #269 / On the day I saw evil

On the day I saw evil
I rode my bicycle down to the graveyard at the foot of Concord Hills, 
the very one that I had passed every morning going to school,
returning home in the afternoon, sometimes taking note
but never sparing a second thought
and I walked among the dead, even talked to some of them
as the sun fell below the horizon and their spirits rose again to the surface.
“Turn back,” said the older ones, “You’ve still got youth on your side.
Live your life until God calls you home”
But I couldn’t hear them. I only saw the pale and silent 
ghost of a young lady, my age when she died,
her bud of life trampled before it could ever bloom,
alone at the top of a hill under a willow tree
dressed in a moonlight gown pure as pallid skin.
I sprinted up the hill, screaming “Why? 
Why? Tell me why!”
afraid her spirit would quit this plane
as quickly as her life had left the earth.
Her thin lips formed not a word, but her ashen, unblinking eyes
staring straight to the bottom of my soul
told me all I needed to know.
I left the place and never returned,
for there will be time enough for us to get acquainted
when we are all sleeping together.


Details | Didactic | |

we sing sin

we sing sin like it is pure
showing no remorse cause we're unsure
whether we should love or hate the infection we spread
to have all sick by laying in ones bed
presenting passionate love
fooled by revengeful lust
so many fight for their life
selfishness prevents a cure for us
so we suffer from loneliness
easily seduced by the predator
pride is the weakness that makes us prey
cause were blind of our inner peace that we will never know
afraid to face the world who is quick to yell I told you so
continuously singing this song of sin
sincerely I beg humble yourself 
in order that we may live


Details | Lyric | |

Russian Roulette, Won't You Be My Friend?

Will you be my friend and take it all away?
I want to forget all the things from my past.
I want to breathe easily at last.
Can you unlock this cage?
Release me from my prison?
Will you carry out my final decision?
They poison my thoughts
And destroy my brain
It’s so much fun because it’s just a game
The burning in my eyes.
The growing clouds of darkness in my mind.
This sinking feeling in my gut.
They’ll all go away with you.
Let me spin the dial
And pull the lever.
Will I win today?
Will there be an empty click, as my stomach sickens by design?
Will the game end with a bang?
Only Fate can tell if I’ll win or lose.
It’s not up to me, I’m letting Fate choose.


Details | I do not know? | |

Thoughts of Suicide

my eyes tear blood upon these dark mellow cheeks.
These hairs that sit upon my skin are scared;what i once wrote in a diary
every day that passes i die inside,im no longer apart of this life
kill me now,words i would only dream of, as if death were creeping next to me
the person who i pretend to be walk the halls , she blends in with conversation
blurry isles lead me to damaged roads, i stumble on my own fears
running gets me no where, shawdows dare to to hide their face. 


Details | I do not know? | |

the 1 i want and need

You inject yourself into my bloodstream
And give me a sense of high
But when you leave,
Your cravings become apparent

You force me to care and love
But I know you’ll only be around
For a minute length of time
And then you’ll leave me shivering and dead inside
Upon an empty couch

I try not to attach to anyone
Because I know it will only lead to pain
But you latch onto my strenuous beating heart
Like a bat onto its prey

I fear and know that it will lead directly to pain
The withdrawal symptoms of torched and tired aortic machine
Whether you, move away, leave me or you die, any leave will kill me
So why not do it now

Now I need you to keep going
I need you to survive

I live for you but want to die
And that’s the truth from I 


Details | Rhyme | |

I've Lost My Way

I always give in, to this useless beating.
I feel alive every now and then, but pain is still defeating.
All I say is goodbye, again my heart you keep.
Still I cry, even when i sleep.
I remember those days, when everything was real.
In my head that memory stays, helping my mind heal.
Locked in this tormenting hell, you sent me to this place.
For me it is hell, and yet you spit in my face.
You said it wasnt my fault, I wasnt complaining.
Again we fought, causing my blood to be staining.
I've lost my way, would you help me find?
I can no longer stay, do you leave our love behind?
Take your breath, and say goodbye.
I feel death, so you begin to cry.
Why try to save, what is already lost?
You came crying at my grave, was this love's cost?
Just another regret, in this game we play.
Another Romeo and Juliet, amazing we are the same way.
This isnt what I imagined, what i thought
I knew it was the end, the second we fought.
I no longer see my best friend, for I'm not what she sought.
I've lost my way, So I'm dying.
I've lost my way, So I'm defying.
I've found my way, but now I'm crying


Details | Free verse | |

A Selfish Plot

Popping pills to keep me happy?
I want to drink until I'm stupid.
Waste my life away
The destination you predicted
Blood will flood my eyes
You spit ice and freeze my tears
A perfect fit for punishment
It is hard to inhale
The breath you have tightened
So I licked the happiness from the wound

Breath in
A dark soul
A selfish plot
New scabs and a few old scars
Keeps me feeling sane
In this heavy moment
A blaze of demons sent
Spreading venom that surrounds my heart
Numbing visions of what was
Altercations smoldering
A shadow's glance is a downcast feeling 
Fighting to end this rage
Harmony hinting softly
These jaded wings it must renounce
When angel's toss their haloes 
My heart can beat no longer

I bleed alone


Felicia S. Hughes


Details | Rhyme | |

Myrna and the Lion

Myrna had been hiding for years
But finally he'd sniffed her out,
So she turned to face her predator
But his roar made her fast turn about,

And instantly she began running
Though the lion was close on her tail,
Such screams for help were never heard
As she stumbled and let out a wail,

For the lion at last had caught her
And she looked up in horror and fright,
It seemed all was lost for Myrna
As the lion went to take a bite,

But a trap was prepared for the lion!
And his jaw snapped shut in shock
As he found himself bound and imprisoned
And unable to open the lock,

Myrna saw the trap and sighed
As she needed no more fear the beast,
But her welcome relief was short-lived;
She found the cage did not help in the least,

So nobody knew why she worried;
They considered the beast as long gone,
But though Myrna saw the lion ensnared
She heard his roar go on and on.


Details | Lanterne | |

Four Lanternes

Girl
laughing
smiling, too
talking to a
guy

Eat
your food
don’t you laugh
don’t you wonder
why

Be
one with
this feeling
underneath the
sky

Live
your life
be no one else
‘til the day you
die.


Details | Acrostic | |

Suicide

Staring down the barrel.
Unsure i want to do this.
Its so selfish i think.
Caring not for others.
I lie myself against the wall.
Decisions, decisions i guess this is the end.
Eventually, somewhere i will find my mend.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Knife Won't Cut

I see this life,
passing me by,
I see this knife,
in my hand,
at my throat,
but I can't cut,
my hand won't move,
it's frozen,
in fear,
I can't stand the wait,
but death won't take me,
and this knife won't cut.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

These Drugs

I see no reason to live,
I see only reason to die,
I’m not going to fight this feeling,
Because inside I’m dieing,
I falling faster and faster,
I can’t get control of my life,
My head is spinning and my mind is racing,
What more can I get from these drugs,
This addiction,
To this pain and this blood,
To the sight of my suffering,
Feeding me,
Keeping me alive,
Yet allowing me to die,
I will die,
And I will suffer more,
I will kill myself with these drugs,
This blood is all I need.


Details | I do not know? | |

The assumptions of perfection

She is a pretty little girl
keeping her life in line.
At least that is what is thought of her,
she refuses to show it's a lie.
She puts on a good act,
she never lets her pain show.
Everyone fell in love with her smile,
while her hurt they will never know.
"You have it all made out for you,"
yeah, that is what they say.
She laughs at the thought of it all,
when she barely makes it through the day.
She is a pretty little girl,
empty promises and a broken heart.
Two slits across her wrists,
she was never happy from the start.


Details | Free verse | |

ladies first (like bad news)

alone is crowded / suffocation ensues in reaction to such overwhelming
amounts of contrasting one(s, plural, this&that, we wan't it back) leave it
where it's at, deviation from Order will result in ____ / attack. fabulous, 
fusion (illusion), more like toleration, acceptance of the need to pull together
,stand strong&fight, the acquirement of keeping your mouth shut----
[build it all up inside, baby, gimme a ride & save me] maybe gives margin,
leans toward the good, but strives for the bad. sort of, did you, my rib 
cage, (is)broken through ___ & it hurts so much to breathe. ;taken aback
with the joke of sudden, which makes my lip curl; ___ which slings out a 
pearl cuz you won't leave it alone- roll over to your Master, vulnerability 
is by far his favorite flavor. [favoritism,all present for a common cause 
;schism] fear is not what brought me here / fenced in by habit, opportunity
is out of reach, is unclear. __ "hi i'm here today cuz i have a problem"
---- name please?, [never woulda seen it comin, such a pretty face- no 
life to die from, whadda waste.]  beauty mistaken for mutiny ;easyerase.


Details | I do not know? | |

Overcome

We are strong, wise and have the capabilities to rise.
Countries have risen above communism.
Women have risen above sexism.

But when will we rise above the killings, rise above the deaths?

We rise above the school systems and teenage troubles;
but what about the rest?
 
It’s time to stop littering these streets with grief,
time to give our families relief.
How much more pain do you think the inner city can take?
All these fallen  tears are from the heartache that some of us chose to make.

Live life instead of taking it, refuse death instead of creating it.

Our ancestors rose above slavery, we’re rising above hate;
don’t let these headlines (“inner city streets of boston hit 48th homicide of 2006")-
become the inner cities fate.

We rose above so much.
We’ll rise above it all;
but it’s time for our youth to rise before the next generation falls.


Details | I do not know? | |

I'm Sorry

I didn't mean to I swear
It was an accident no doubt 
That Halloween night
We both went out

It was supposed to be fun
And cause a terrible fright
To those who walked by
On an innocent night

Turns out it did scare
But in a different way
I hope you can forgive me
For what I did to you that day

I was a cowgirl 
I didn't know it was loaded
We were playing around
The whole thing exploded

She lay on the ground
It must be her fate
I called for help
But it was too late

I killed her that night
With a backfiring gun
I shouldn't have given it to her
But I can't fix what I've done

I just thought I should say 
Goodbye to you all
I'm going to find her now
I've learned pride comes before a fall

I know you've been hurt
I've done this to you
I'm doing what I can
This is what I can do

I'm going to find her
And make sure she's okay
Make sure she's happy
I'm going today

I'm raising the gun
Putting it to my head
I'll die like she did
God, take me instead


Details | I do not know? | |

PART 1 OF BROKEN ANGEL

BROKEN ANGEL
CAUGHT BETWEEN HEAVEN AND EARTH,
SHE FELL FROM THE SKY
DEFIED BY HEAVENS LOVING EYE
SENT HERE TO DIE.
AS TIME GOES BY
SHES EARNING HER WINGS
SO SHE CAN FINALLY FLY.
I STLL ASK MYSELF WHY?
SHE GIVES US JOY AND LESSONS WITH EACH AND EVERY SMILE SHE BRINGS. FOR ALL MY LIFE THERE ONLY ONE PERSON I EVER WANTED TO BE AND THAT WAS HER. AS A GIRL I MIMICKED HER IN EVERYWAY, I STILL ADMIRE HER STRENGTH TO THIS DAY. SHE KNEW EVEN THOUGH SHE COULDN’T SEE THERES NOWAY I COULD EVER BE. NOW SHE IS TAKEN FROM ME, BROKEN ANGEL SENT HERE TO RESCUE ME.

BROKEN ANGEL
CAUGHT BETWEEN HEAVEN AND EARTH,
SHE FELL FROM THE SKY
DEFIED BY HEAVENS LOVING EYE
SENT HERE TO DIE.
AS TIME GOES BY
SHES EARNING HER WINGS
SO SHE CAN FINALLY FLY.
SHES GOING TO FIND HER DREAMS,
IM NOT READY TO SAY GOODBYE.
SHES A VOICE FROM GOD, OPENING OUR EYES, EARS, AND HEARTS TO WHAT GOD GAVE US FROM THE START. SMILING THREW THE TEARS TREASURING LIFE AS TIME GOES BY EACH AND EVERYDAY, WHILE I LIVE IN FEAR THINKING THIS DAY WILL BE HER LAST, WONDERING IF THE PAIN WILL EVER PASS. SHE CAN’T SEE, HEAR, WALK, OR TALK, BUT THE PRICE SHE HAD TO PAY, I CAN EACH AND EVERYDAY OPENING MY HEART WITH WHAT SHE CAN’T SAY. I WAS FIGHTING A WAR WHILE SHE WAS FIGHTING FOR HER LIFE; SHE IS LETTING GO OF STRIFE, AS SHE LOSES THIS FIGHT.


Details | I do not know? | |

Seventeen

Its the dead of night,
were lying in the grass
the stars glimmer down
the light of a lit cigarette dangles above
coils of smoke drift above his head
i'm laying apart from him
every word that comes from his mouth drips with agony
"if this is good as its gonna get,
lets just leave now"
the thoughts in my head,
they shake from side to side
"i'm dying" i say,
he looks at me, another drag from his cigarette
"aren't we all" he says
"every second that passes,
is a second closer to dying"
and this is what kills me.


Details | I do not know? | |

Whispers and lies

i hear every whisper
every lie
do you wish for me to die?
i sit here
with my razor blade
it becomes my pen
my skin
becomes paper
i write thsi bloody poem
the worsd forming
in every drop of blood
such a ville hate
put forward when i see your face
do you know wghat youve done
destoyed my life in many ways
i no longer feel alive
in dieing inside
are you happy?...now
im no longer here
goodbye
a single tea r runs down my ice cold cheek
not one of regret
but one of happiness
happy my pain is ending 
tonight....


Details | I do not know? | |

The Fight

A punch, a kick

They can't last much longer

They elbow, they knee

How are they still going on

A shot, a knife

I guess its over know

A prayer, some tears

This wouldn't have happened if not for

The fight.


Details | ABC | |

Accidents Happen

driving down the street jamming out to the beat 
not knowing what we were about to meet 
the next thing i knew i had fallen asleep 
waking up to the screeching of tires 
i pinched myself hoping it was just a bad dream 

as i feel something grab me pulling me to safety 
i look back and i see the complete opposite 
pain blood agony 
my friends my family nearing death 

the sound of sirens draw nearer and nearer 
carting one by one off to the hospital 
for hope that their lives can be saved 

sitting int he waiting room 
pondering why it wasnt me looking death in the eye 
why must i always be the one standing by 
why is it my hearts the one to cry 
too many times its me saing goodbye 

as the sun starts to rise 
i jet back home so my parents arent surprised 
jump in the shower getting ready as if nothing happened 
during the day my mask is put on the night is when it comes off 
forced to face reality of the horrifying accident that had just happened 

every breathe i take feels as though it is not worthy of being breathed 
what has happened to me 
why all the lies why all the pain 
where did the old me go 

day by day i wait anxiously for the latest news about my friends 
till finally the out come has arrived 
marcus will not survive 
after hearing the news my heart shattered into a million pieces 
how many more are going to be taken away 
where am i supose to go from here 

tear after tear 
my heart grows with more fear 
fear of loosing others fear to take off my mask and show the world i am hurting 
how can this be how can so many people die when it should be me 

the answer is it was an accident 
nothing can be changed about what has happened 
the cure is time 
and that is what i seem to have a whole lot of 


Details | Verse | |

Ascension Avenue

All that was holy died in resplendence.
  kerbstones bit gutters and gutters sucked road,
black and white zebra stripes buried by snowflakes,
  wires fizzed and snapped as their cups overflowed.

Cars lay abandoned, the milk float down-charged,
  four-by-four mega trucks grounded and still,
seagulls kept guard on memorial statues,
  screeched at the sea that lay over the hill.

Behold velvet drapes flanking twitchy lace curtain,
  knuckles clenched white whilst brows knitted grey,
women of substance blew tea in bone china,
  until it fell cool at the passing of day.

All lowered eyes to the carpet and skirting,
  fingers flicked lint more imagined than real,
from the cuffs of their blouses, the plaid of their skirts,
  substitution for anything human to feel.

She who self-hanged in the cramped bedroom closet,
  hands dangled lifelessly down by her side,
lips black and swollen, ghost kissing conscience,
  tongue poking purple and eyes staring wide.

The avenue drowned in a quagmire of quiet,
  decency nailed to each window and door,
Winter would pass, taking with it the memory,
  for what, more or less, is another dead whore?

Spring is the mistress of life and vivacity,
  Summer the passion child, sweet honey breath,
Autumn the lover whose time is expiring,
  Then pale mistress Winter, and Winter is death.


Details | Free verse | |

unmarked snow

it is a relationship based on trust / based on I Must Have You
_____ Now / somehow / anyhow / need that blend of painguilt &
pleasure / by any measure, have to achieve the ____ maximum / (the
step before finito) //
      //where was it that i lost / you, / self? when did
      i agree to live like this? / i missed out on something /
      crucial / & i fear i've lost my chance to be / 
                                                     ok.
monsters / rest/ in the dark _____ i miss that / that bold
presence tensing my muscles / poising my mind for
every / little / thing that ever was / seconds registered &
remembered with the respect given to / years / a moment is
all it takes to ________ take you away. //
      //hygiene _____ seenfeltknown inside & out / suffering /
      pretending so hard that it's worth / it. the universe is
      in a fit / thrashing about the cage of man-made
      rage / release sought in the singular death of / a
      faith, one by one / every following murder is easier /
      than the _____ previous.
teach me the true meaning / of / now _____ show me how
to forget all the standards i've let myself / pick up / leave
my body of anything below the Best & with the rest _____
_____ destroy. / ignorance is a virtue, allow me to stay
blind while you pursue / the occupation & i can blame
it on not / knowing / any _______ better //
      don't ask me / why, / i'd defend it to the death / 
      it was worth the try ________ .
lean back ____ clear / your / mind / see how long it takes
you till you can't find / yourself / ____ after a while the
awareness gets put / back on the shelf due to / lack of
use. the constant impending abuse is a bafflement, hanging
between every / slip / of ________ for it remains the /
unexplained.
                                        / i'm walking straight into hell
                      too fukced up to tell
exactly why it was i fell. /


Details | Free verse | |

Twist of the Knife

I cry until I have no more tears left to cry.
I feel all the agony until I am numb inside.
I scream until I have nothing left to scream.
But it all comes back, again and again.

A never ending, gaping hole dark and but not empty.
It can never bee filled, a void from which nothing returns.
Swallowed up by the darkness, the emptiness.
Consuming and relentless in it’s pursuit of consumption.

A cut so deep it wont heal.
Every injury I suffer, made fresh with each move.
A stab to my fragile, trusting heart.
A twist of the knife and all is bare.

The walls begin to collapse all around me.
My world is tumbling down, I am frozen, completely.
Paralyzed, unable to move, there's no stopping the defeat.
The decimation that ends my life in this cruel and twisted way.
London bridge is falling down, but not as hard as me.


Details | ABC | |

Justin

So many loud noises all around, 
Screaming, yelling, to put the gun down, 
as the tip of the gun reached your head, I cry out, take me instead, 
Thrown to the ground praying on the way down 
I lied there hopelessly knowing I can’t do anything to make it stop, 
when I watched your own brother slowly squeeze the trigger, 
I closed my eyes hoping that it was just a dream, 
The last thing I heard that night was the echo of the bullet that perced through the 
untouchable Justin 

So much blood so much pain, 
I crawled over to you wishing to hear you say everything was going to be ok, 
I put my head on your stomach feeling the last breathe leave your body, 
No more will you be there to talk to, 
No more will you be there to comfort me when times get rough, 
No more will you be there to make me laugh, 
I just wish I could take this all back. 

You were my best friend, my other half, 
People say we were inseparable, 
I guess they were wrong because now you are gone, 
Leaving me all alone, 
Lost and confused not knowing what to do, 
Things will never be the same without you, 
This empty space within me will never be filled, 
My spirits of hope, happiness, are killed. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Why?

Did she do it because she was lonely

or because she felt left out

Was it because we neglected her

or some other reason we don't know

All we know is that she did

But what i want to know is

Will we ever know

Why?


Details | I do not know? | |

A Story

The story begins, life is good
Things occur just as they should
The girl knows nothing she's just a baby
Her future's assured with a simple maybe
As she grows the story progresses
With nail polish and bright pink dresses
She knows of death, her brother has died
She learned of sadness as she cried
Was life that hard, so filled with strife
That he chose to end it with that knife
She's only six but old enough
To be told to toughen up
The story's longer, she's much older
Her spirit becoming colder and colder
In her life there's so much pain
Spread around like a huge dark stain
She's made her choice, an easy decision
But should she make a clean incision
Or some other way that's easy to do
There's hanging and pills and gunshots too
She chooses the gun for she feels it is right
A way to end her life this night
She lays there with the weapon in hand
Nestled in the warm wet sand
As she lays beneath the moon
She knows the time must come soon
She could feel it now, her brother was with her
And with that, she pulled the trigger
The story ended, the girl was gone
Not to be found until the dawn


Details | I do not know? | |

Hatchet

I've argued and fought
But nothing's changed you
So I'll bury the hatchet
Only after it runs through you body
Cutting and hacking
Impailing your skin with vengeful force
It's been so long since my last tear
But the pain lingers back in my mind
Buried by the love of another
The shaken voices tell me something wonderful
Your life's end could be near
I'll send you south of Hell
Where I'm looking down from above


Details | Free verse | |

No more

There’s no pain i feel inside
   No more happy moments that i remember 
No more feelings left for you
  No more emotions coming up beneath my skin
Not a single thought of you hunt me 
  All dreams of you disapeared infront of me
And thankfully no more tears of mine falling from my eyes
  No expression left on my face 
My skin is un-naturaly pale 
  No man to love
No more lies and broken heart to deal with
  No more life for me to live


Details | I do not know? | |

PART 2 OF BROKEN ANGEL

BROKEN ANGEL
CAUGHT BETWEEN HEAVEN AND EARTH,
SHE FELL FROM THE SKY
DEFIED BY HEAVENS LOVING EYE
SENT HERE TO DIE.
AS TIME GOES BY
SHES EARNING HER WINGS
SO SHE CAN FINALLY FLY.
WHEN AN ANGEL DIES IT IS NOT PEACEFUL, BUT FULL OF PAIN AND STRIFE.
THIS IS HER SACRIFICE.
I KNEW ALL HER LIFE SHED NEVER GROW OLD HER HEART IS WEAKER THAN HER SOLE, SHE OUT LIVED ALL PREDICTIONS TOLD. THIS BROKEN ANGEL WAS A HERO TRYING TO BREAK FREE. ONLY SHE DIDN’T SEEM SO BROKEN TO ME,

BROKEN ANGEL
CAUGHT BETWEEN HEAVEN AND EARTH,
SHE FELL FROM THE SKY
DEFIED BY HEAVENS LOVING EYE
SENT HERE TO DIE.
AS TIME GOES BY
SHES EARNING HER WINGS
SO SHE CAN FINALLY FLY.
OUR EARTH TREADING HEAVEN, WHO NEVER TOLD A LIE,
SHE NEVER CHEATED.
SHE NEVER STOLE.
SHE NEVER SINNED IN HER LIFE HER INNOCENCE HOLDS TRUE.
AS SHE IS SLOWLY DEFEATED, LISTENING TO THE ANGELS SING SHE TALKS TO GOD DAY TO DAY,
WATCHING US AS WE PRAY.
PAIN DOESN’T MEAN A THING.
NOW SHE HAS HER WINGS. WHO NEEDS LEGS WHEN YOU CAN FLY?
FLY HIGH!
FLY HIGTH, FLY AWAY FROM THE PAIN AND HOSPITAL STAYS, FOR YOU I WILL ALWAYS PRAY.
BROKEN ANGEL, TAKE YOUR BEAUTIFUL GOLDEN WINGS AND FLY AWAY UNTIL WE’RE BACK TOGETHER SOMEDAY.


Details | Romanticism | |

Needing You

Thriving for you because I am blue
You left me here now I feel a tear
My death bed awaits as I debate
My blood falls I hear your call
but your to late so please don't hate
My death bed was there so now I tear
open the door and hell showed me more
but now i'm gone so carry on 
i'm somewhere else why couldn't I have dealt
with you gone but now I've been washed away 
into my own tortured song


Details | I do not know? | |

Please Help Me

I hear a rapping on my window,
Ting, ting,
Ting, ting.

Theres a banging on my door,
Tap, tap,
Tap, tap.

My phone is ringing off the wall,
Clang, clang,
Clang, clang.

But I can't answer them,
Because I'm dead,
Dead inside.

Please help me.


Details | I do not know? | |

Why daddy


Why dad did you hit me?
Why mom dont you belive me?
Whats wrong sissy did he hit you to?
Bubby's in the corner crying.
Mommy he hit us he dosnt love us.
Daddy you've changed.
Why dont you care anymore?
We walk in to talk to mom but shes on the floor lying in her blood.Dead.
Daddy walks in gun n hand.
Crack goes the first shot right at bubby.
Snap goes the second shot right at sissy..Im thinkingto my self"Am I next?"
The gun goes off again but this time at him self.I stand there in shock to scared 
to move.
The police show up and take me in.
I have a new family and friends.
Everything is good i go to mommy's grave every day and think to my self "why not 
me?"


Details | Lyric | |

Tendencies

My self-destructive tendencies
are finally catching up with me
The sleepless nights
and endless days,
all lost within an exhausted haze,
and all are making me slowly fade away
I can feel my strength dissipating
Right now everything is just too frustrating
as I feel my health slowly slipping into disease
When does life count more than dreams?
It seems that line is undefined
Is doing what makes you happy
despite its ill-effects
and trying to accomplish what you want in life
despite its inevitable detriments
worth cutting your life a bit short?
Is that hastened death a bearable price
when you’re just trying to make your life a bit nicer for once?


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Take This Life

I have the pills,
I have the knife,
and I have the gun in my hand,
I can't shoot,
I can't cut,
and my throat's to dry to swallow,
my heart,
won't stop beating,
I'm still living,
helplessly alive,
somebody take this life.


Details | I do not know? | |

Nothing

I am nothing 
The child of the deep dark world of depression
The child of suffering
The child of suffocation
I overcome my fears through acting like they don't exist
To place them under a rug to keep hid
My weaknesses will one day throttle me to death
I am in charge of the misery in my head and the pain in my body
My future is to find a way out of this horrible world
To make all realize the pain caused and damage done
And finally come out with all emotions I feel 
About everyone and everything


Details | I do not know? | |

Girl in the mirror

looking in the mirror
what does she see
a girl lost in reality
abandoned by hope, deserted by fate
longing to be in love once again
but only one thing to do
she cant take her self any more
she breaks the mirror and runs away crying
as the girl in the mirror lays broken on the floor 
looking up in hopes someone will come along to pick her up
she felt as if she was the reason
why she ran away
but only the innocence left in the mirror 
could scare the girl, into running away
she didn't like what she has become
a lovesick girl
who thought that giving herself away would keep him
but only made him walk away 
now shes left with broken pieces and one sad story
she feels as if she can never love again 
but as the broken mirror pieces
give her hope, and will help her fly 
because she is the only one who still believes
that love is still just a fairy tale waiting to be read 
so the girl in the mirror will wait for someone she can help keep alive
and put them in the light


Details | Free verse | |

Can't Take It

I have a knife at my throat,
but I'm to scared to use it,
I can't do it,
I can't take life,
a rope is to suffering,
I can't take the jump,
I can't take this life,
but I still can't live it,
I want to die,
but I can't,
I'm to scared,
why can't I take my life,
the knifes in my hand,
at my throat,
but I can't make the cut,
I can't die this way,
I can't jump,
with this rope around my neck,
I can't take this life,
can you take it for me?


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Rape, Anger, Murder

You know why I'm here,
you owe me big,
I can't help it you can't pay up,
for what you did to me,
you took my youth,
my spirit,
and my smile,
and now I'm back,
and you can't save yourself now,
you never could,
you always got in trouble,
and now,
you in trouble for real.

My smile,
my laugh,
and my innocence,
were brutally taken from me,
and now I'm getting my revenge,
and I'm stepping up,
for the first time in a long time,
and I'm not holding back.
So tell your friends there why I'm here,
come on,
don't be scared,
tell them what you did,
and why your going to die.


Details | Rhyme | |

Don't Want To Live

I don't want to live,
my hearts beating faster,
I don't want to live,
I don't need no stupid pastor,
I don't want to live,
To move my body your going to need that caster,
I don't want to live,
and you can't make me,
I don't want to live,
Please here my plea,
I don't want to live,
Please just see.


Details | Free verse | |

My Murderer

I cut my wrist once more
Make the pain go away!
But not even the sight of blood can heal this pain…

I didn’t mean it
I mean, I didn’t try…
I mean I didn’t want to
But your words drove me insane inside

I couldn’t help it mom, dad
Please forgive…
I couldn’t help the urge
The pain I didn’t feel
His insults drove me insane
Deep inside im still crying
I still feel like im dying

You still say you love him mom
Do I even exist to you?
Or are you blind?
Cant you see the pain im going thru

There were those days…
Where I only wore black
It was a symbol to how little life meant to me
I wanted you to see mom, how I felt
But you never saw
Maybe you did…
But you never cared
You had it in your mind he’d always be there
But he cheated didn’t he?
He betrayed all your trust
And now he wants to be my friend???
After all the damage he did…
Maybe he doesn’t see either
He never saw my point..

You see…
With insults he raises you just ‘to be the best’
And in the end, you’ll never be like the rest
Im fighting mental problems now
A little voice inside my head
When Im around him now
That little voices is screaming
‘you gotta run. You gotta turn around. You gotta grab that knife. You can end it all 
right now’

But here I’ll end my story, 
With one question for you…
Is there really life after death?
If there is im in trouble
Cuz when I die Im in double
isn’t suicide a sin?
But under the circumstances im in…
If you think about….

There was no for me to win

Im the murderer…not him?


Details | Sonnet | |

Bleeding Ink

She bleeds in ink
Writes in blood
She's at the brink
of falling victim

She cuts with verbs
and sings with glass
she cries herself to sleep
And prays for the depression to pass

Water runs in her veins
Drinking blood
to subside her emotional pains
she falls victim to decadence

She bleeds ink and cries blood
she never had a chance of staying victim


Details | Rhyme | |

Grim

The sun rises.
The reaper gathering the prizes.
Souls and just general death.
Taking life with one breath.
Gradually coming around.
Not speaking the tortures aloud.
Within one blink of an eye.
All your attempts and hopes run dry.

The sun sets.
Do away with all of your regrets.
He doesn't care about past shame.
Doesn't look for someone to blame.
The Reaper takes without thought.
Death is one thing that cannot be bought.
Forsaken or forlorn.
Life is meant to be born.


Details | Bio | |

Excess

She hated her life
Made the wrong decision
Now shes rid of strife
Rid of all the derision

She took her life
But what caused her decision?
We forced the strife
We forced the derision

She wanted to live the way she enjoyed
This ridicule and suffering is what we employed
We called her a whore, we called her a slut
If you delved into her life she was anything but

This rose has wilted under the immense stress
Who the hell were we to cause this, this excess
Our excess of hatred and ridicule did bring
The end of her life, shes riding on wings

I don't think this act I can forget
My mind has wandered, I constantly fret
We caused her pain, we brought her death
Now I think I'll breathe my last breath

For her
For what we were


Details | Rhyme | |

Survival of the Weak

I survive.
Only to keep myself alive.
Living one day to the next.
Writing and typing useless text.
Keeping me from destroying myself.
And everyone else.
Violence hidden and buried.
A burden that is discreet and carried.
Faces of my former friends.
Knowing that they will meet their ends.
And I will survive like always.
Because this nausious feeling always stays.
Sickening me and telling me.
That I will never agree.
Occurring to live on.
Like an Ex-Con.
Released into the living.
The careless and unforgiving.
I survive just to die.
I survive just to cry.
Living my days until they cease.
Until my soul is able to release.
From it's restraints that I carry.
The things that it won't allow me to bury.
Surviving the worst kind of pain.
Loss of nerve to the stupid and inane.
Loss of family and those I was close to.
When they're life was through.
I stood there, frozen.
With my heart wide open.
For the taking.
For the breaking.
So you can take it.
And you can break it.
Destroy it.
Before I get too lost.
Before it's your life thats my cost.


Details | Senryu | |

Learning War

      Xbox Live again
every day the same old game
     should be Xbox dead


Details | I do not know? | |

Razorblade death

Falling,

In a down ward flare,
	
	
Falling,

Spiraling to the cold hard ground,

		
Falling,

As all animals and creatures are sedate,


			Falling,

A cold dark glare,


Falling,

Is all I see as I hit the ground with a big loud pound,

	Falling,


To the edge of a blade,


		Falling,


To a razor blade death.


Details | Couplet | |

Untitled #131 / Call me deep

Call me deep ‘cause I drowned
in a sea of sorrow
in a rock by the door find the lock
and the keys tomorrow
call me lucky ‘cause I weathered the storm
that rages in my head
but I still can’t help but wonder
if we’re better off dead


Details | Rhyme | |

I Can't Believe You're Gone Away

Ronald I can’t believe you’re gone away
When we used to have sex it seemed just like the other day
My life hasn’t been the same since you’ve been gone
But I know if you were here you would want me to move on
I remember the good times we have had
When I think about you being gone it makes me so sad
Once I said we were spending too much time together
Now I wish we can hang out forever
I didn’t realize how much I cared until June 17, 2004
I just couldn’t believe I wasn’t going to see you anymore
When I heard the news I didn’t want to believe it was you
But when I called your house I knew it was true
That was the saddest thing that had happened this year
I shed so many tears since you’re not here
I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to see you for the very last time
But when I see you upstairs everything will be just fine



Details | I do not know? | |

Grim Reaper

A dark road that has been deserted
the coldness in the air
the broken hearted
souls flying freely
they have not moved on
for the life they have once had is now gone
the guy in black with no face
collecting the souls leaving no trace
he collects the souls one by one
his job he has now will never be done


Details | I do not know? | |

Nightmares

My nightmares
Aren't escapable
I'm in capable
To make this pain go away
To destroy my misery from my head
They can't be explained
Soon I might go insane
Thinking my dreams might be real
Running ans never facing my dreams head on
Never coming out on top
When will they stop
Failing every single night
They're recurring
I can't do this all year
My internal wounds need to be healed
My nightmares....
Will never stop until I die


Details | I do not know? | |

Wishing

Wishing things would be different
Wishing my pain wasn't infinite 
Wishing my causes had a purpose 
Wishing i could walk freely on the surface 
Wishing these tears would stop falling 
Wishing temptation would stop calling
Wishing i wouldn't be punished hashly
Wishing my misery wouldn't be finished partly 
Wishing my end would be pending 
Wishing this knife would mark the ending
Wishing when i take my last pleasant breath 
Wishing i could tell them before i left
Wishing my suffering would cease & finish
Wishing my anger would be deminished 
Wishing is only sucessful when......
You fulfill your wishes until the brutal end


Details | Free verse | |

Picture Perfect

A shattered destiny with an attempt that failed
Razor wire wrapped around her skin,
Pulled tight
My memories stick to me like photographs of the past,
Scarring me


Never the thought of how her fate cultivated
Her life flashed before my eyes,
And there I was on my knees crying
Wishing this were only a dream,
Covered in blood, with her body in my arms


As I spoke my last words to her, 
I told her the truth,
I told her
I love you


With her last few breaths 
I guess she thought she could have written down what she would have said
Only the blood was dripping down her neck
Now here she lies seventeen and dead


Details | I do not know? | |

Suicidal

Sitting beside the water, Underneath one of the stars.
Everybody watches him as they drive by in their cars.
Tear-filled eyes sits this troubled child.
His heart is sad his mind gone wild.
With no one to comfort him, alone he sits in sorrow;
Hoping his problems will be gone away tomorrow.
And while he waits a tear falls down, rolls off his leg and drops to the ground.
His body is aching, his eyes are red
He has this sharp pain in the center of his head.
He thinks back on life and all the things he didn't do;
And while he thinks he pulls out a .22!
With the gun to his head he cries one last cry;
As he thinks how good It will be for him to die!
The trigger gets pulled back and so does his life.
With just one shot he ended all his pain and strife!!!
He didn't stop to think who might be hurt;
As they watch his body being carried to the dirt.
All he could see was the bad in life and all the people who didn't care.
How his mother hated him because he was a painful reminder of the father who 
was no longer there.
How he was constantly bullied and picked on at school.
Or how the only girl he ever loved played him for a complete fool.
Tears, pain ,love, strain;
Lots of lose no gain!!!!!


Details | I do not know? | |

Is This Really Me? (convinced)

she stands in front of the mirror. why can't anyone see her?
she's hurt and she's scared, no ones ever there.
she thinks about maybe taking her very last wink...because she's convinced that 
nobody cares

She thinks about tomarrow, it doesnt matter to her.
all she sees is this image in the mirror and wonders, "is this really me?"
The ground she stands is very weak, her laugh she fakes, hoping to wake the 
next day and be happy...still she's convince that she cant be.
She sits and looks at her wrists...all cut up and bloody. and she starts to 
wonder, "is this really me?"

Her eyes bloodshot from the quiet tears that run down her cheaks, and her thraot 
is swollen from all her silent screams.
why doesnt anyone hear her?
why was she so convinced that nobody cares?

If only someone was there to catch her before she fell, before she startsed to 
wonder. i wish someone would let her see what she really needs to think. but all 
she ever did was wonder, "is this really me?"
and then she found her answer.......but now..where is she??


Details | I do not know? | |

Tomorrow.....?

The blade presses against her wrist.
Slowly shredding the skin.
Causing droplets of blood to form.
And the relief of pain.

She finally has what she's wanted,
The physical feeling of pain.
It makes her feel alleviated.
...Will she do it again?

She places the blade next to the first cut,
Slowly pulling it across her skin,
As she watches the blood droplet slide off her wrist,
And burst when it hits the floor.
 
She then wipes off the blood coated blade,
And hides it in her dresser drawer.
She sits down on her bed with tears rolling down her pale cheek,
And prepares herself for that gratifying feeling again tomorrow.


Details | Rhyme | |

My Final Words

Heaven where is my angel now, I cannot see.
Should I graciously bow, though they cant help me?
Could you hear my call, if I screamed?
I still fall, did you stare as death's eyes gleamed.
I'm no longer hanging on, I have no hope.
Dreams are all gone, Faith and life never cope.
I' m suffocating, under all this pressure.
All this hating, just wants to lure.
I can no longer control, what happens in my life.
Like a demon without a soul, I dig deeper with my knife.
What can I do, to make you realize?
I cant stand thinking of you, and looking in your eyes.
I slam into everything true, I fall to the floor.
Why cant I forget you, all this makes me beg for more.
All of this I hate, I dont see a reason.
I don't want to wait, those words are treason.
My final words upon my death, written on my grave.
With my last breath, and in the engrave.
"I love you, but I sing the sorrow."
Now I'm through, Now I don't have to live through hellish tomorrow.
Fists start to fly, against his face.
He starts to cry, such a disgrace.
You should say goodbye, he's leaving this place.
I watch him die, delicate as the blackest lace.


Details | I do not know? | |

Finish me off

Now that I hit the floor.
Finish me off.
I'm broken inside and out.
I'm useless and all un figured out.
No use for me know.
Now that I hit the floor.
Finish me off.
Now that I am nothing more.


Details | I do not know? | |

Diffrent

I am different,
In many ways,
Clothes,
Thoughts,
Drawings,
Friends,
My clothes are different,
In many ways,
Black,
Chains,
Straps,
Baggy,
My thoughts are different,
In many ways,
Drugs,
Sex,
Suicide,
Murder,
My drawings are different,
In many ways,
Dark,
Depressing,
Sad,
Twisted,
My friends are different,
In many ways,
Preps,
Jocks,
Goths,
Nonsocial,
	I am me.
				I am different.




Details | I do not know? | |

threat

  Threat

THE THREAT HAD COME DOZEN OF TIMES
NOW THEY STOOD BEHIND A DO NOT CROSS LINE
IN THE YEARS
THAT NEVER EXPECTED ANOTHER COLUMBINE
SO MANY SIGNALS,SO MANY SIGNS
PSYCHOLOGISTS PISSED AT NOT SEEING THE SIGNS ON TIME
WISHING IT HAD COME BEFORE THERE EYES AS BY SOMETHING DIVINE
EVERYONE SEEMED SO SHOCKED AND LOST
JOCKS FELT LIKE CRAP
LAUGHTER, WE WERE JUST HORSING AROUND
NOW BODIES LAY ON THE GROUND
PARENTS BRUSHED IT OFF HE'S JUST ACTING OUT
BODIES IN BODY BAGS WHO'S ACTING NOW
WHO? WHAT? WHERE? AND hOW?
THIS WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN
WHY THEY DIDNT BELIEVE EM NO ONE KNOWS
DEMONS RELEASED FROM A CAGE
FILLED WITH ANGER AND RAGE
WAS NEVER ON THE SAME PAGE
CALMN AND COLLECTIVE TO AN UNCONTROLLABLE RAGE
AFTER A WHILE THE BRUISES BECAME COMMONPLACE
THE ANTICIPATION WAS MORE PAINFUL
WHEN THE ACTAUL VIOLENCE CAME HE JUST COVERED HIS FACE
CALL IT TRAGEDY. CALL IT RUTHLESS. CALL IT REVENGE
MISLED YOUTH
CONTEMPLATION FROM SUICIDE TO HOMICIDE
GOT ROOKIE COPS HOLDING THEIR INSIDES
JUST LOOK AT HIS RECORD THEY WOULD SAY
NOW THER MOUTHS WERE LEFT OPEN WIDE
TEARS START ROLLING AS THEY ROLLOUT THE YELLOW TAPE
LAST GOODBYES. LAST FAREWELLS
ESCAPE FROM A LIVING HELL
A LIVING NIGHTMARE
EVEN GOT THE DEVIL FIGHTING BACK TEARS
MANY FUNERALS CAME THAT DAY
THE KILLER RAY. THE VICTIMS GOT MEMORIALS
RAY GOT EDITORIALS
THE REPORTERS CALLED HIM A MONSTER
HIS FAMILY CALLED HIM THEIR CHILD
NO TRIALS.
SO FILE.
WORDS COME FAST FROM THEIR MOUTHS
LIKE AN AUTOMATIC
GOT THEM BREATHING HARD LIKE ASTHMATICS
MORE WORK FOR THE PARAMEDICS
TH THREAT HAD COME
THE THREAT WAS REVEALED
THE THREAT WAS SADLY TRUE
16 DEATHS
16 BULLETS
ROOKIES SWEATING BULLETS
SILENCE NEVER SEEMED SO LOUD


Details | I do not know? | |

I'm The Girl

I'm the girl you wish weren’t here.
I'm the girl with nothing to lose, 
Yet everything to fear.
I'm the girl you poke fun at when you have nothing to do.
I'm the girl you never knew.
I'm the girl who stood alone.
Who is going to cast the first stone?
I'm the girl that wanted a friend.
I'm the girl you couldn't comprehend.
I'm girl who loved to love.
I'm the girl filled with rage and hate.
I'm the girl no one saw until it was to late.
No one knew suicide I would contemplate.
I'm the girl who had no reason to wait.
I'm the girl who was always left out.
I'm the girl you loved to talk about.
I'm the girl who fell through the cracks.
I'm the girl pulling knives out of my back.
I'm the girl who stuck a bullet in my head.
I'm the girl laying here in a puddle of blood dead.


Details | ABC | |

Lonely

I used to be filled with life. Happiness and strife. All of this has passed me by. 
I cannot even let out a sigh. Only to be lonely and cold. I've lost my faith Im not 
as bold. I need some one to guide my back. Get me away from these brutal attacks. I 
only wish I was not alone. To be brought back to life from this concrete stone. My 
life was stolen from me. I will run away to the wild sea. I sneak out without a 
Sound. I wake up on the cold hard ground. My body aches from the torture. I can 
only see is a portrait of her. My mother my saint. This women fought to protect me 
from you. I speak "why did you kill her?" You reply "She was just like you! A 
useless women!" I cry to God to help me now "Please take me away from this world!
I don't want to be lonely anymore. I wont take the beatings once more! I will break 
free from these chains! I want my life back! Give me it now..." As i slowly fade 
from the world. I can a voice call to me. It sounds like an angel. NOw all is 
quite. I am not alone anymore. You have brought me back to her. Thank you God. I am 
finally at peace. While the devil sits in a lonely cell. I am with my angel my 
mother. While he sits in ...


Details | Rhyme | |

Abuse

You abused me 
emotionally and physically
why would you do such a thing
i thought you loved me

but i guess you didn't
and it was all a lie
why did you abuse me
you even made me cry

it hurts in and out
my body and spirit
I'm yelling and screaming inside and out
but you can not hear it


Details | Free verse | |

Think of Me

Think of me as you stand there
You're entering a new life
Have new friends
You left the past behind
And with that past you left me
You were all that truly mattered to me
I thought you really cared
I thought together we would begin this journey
A journey into the future
But you left without me
You began a journey you promised to share
I was left to mourn the loss of a friend
Without you I had no future
Nothing to look towards 
Nothing on my horizon
Without a future I wanted no life
I ended the pain
Left behind the sorrow
I gave into the thoughts
What good was I without you
What did I have left 
What was my reason to hold on
You learned of my death
Realized what had been done
Do you miss me
Do you wish you could go back
Was it worth it
Do you still think back on our past
Look at your future
Was the death of our friendship worth it
Worth all you now have
Was my death in vain


Details | Rhyme | |

Unreal

my empty life theres no escaping
it can take and form or shape
a sad story with a fairytale ending
but my path ahead still is twisting and bending
the seed of rage burns a whole inside me
it burns so deep that theres nothing to see
the seed of rage then changes to a tree of guilt
the insignificate change like grains of silt
and washes over me till i break down and cry
but theres nothing left so i'm wanting to die
my face turns cold and my inside hollow
the guilt i feel i try to swallow
but the power it has is at full strength 
i can so far and but not at any length
there always there but never around
always here but can not be found
the hole I've built gets deeper and deeper
it's got so big its a permanent keeper
the life i lead now seems like a dream
it blinds the sight like a lightening beam
so this is it my finally goodbye
my life ahead at its final design


Details | Rhyme | |

My Terrible, but Beautiful Love

I am all alone, I can not take this.
No one at all can know what I go through.
So long since I have felt a time of bliss,
Never in my life, have I felt this blue.

I beg my heart to just let me die here.
I wish I could go to my friends and cry.
Will not shed tears, for I will not be near.
I must leave this cold world and say good bye.

Fade fast, as I kill this pain caused from him.
I love it how each pill slows my mind down,
Feel it, I am so dead, it's all for Jim.
My pain is gone, do you think he will frown?

I wake to meet his eyes, I am not dead.
Did not mean to hurt me, we are in love.


Details | Free verse | |

die in your dream

1
flying insects tackling each other in the name of
sight. it's okay, as long as they see what's going on,
that makes it right, makes it worth it. tiny iron
bodies crash into the electric light bulb, crash &
bounce, crash & bounce, crash & fall.

2
clocks are against the living. time continues ticking
as a way to torture us to death. its hands wrap around
my neck & rip me from night into day, day into night.
life with this structure knows nothing more than to 
follow. the earth is a revolving clock.

3
the baby is the bright shock of flame, the very moment
the candle becomes lit. progression, destruction,
abandonment- the candle is burning. (staring at the sun
causes blindness.) stare into your own flame, frenzy the
body of the fire with your breath, cause your own
death.

4
"i heard that if you die in your dream then automatically it
comes true, & you don't wake up." 
i'd like to consider the source.


Details | I do not know? | |

Dead Now

Your killing me already.
Iv 'e died so many times.
I'm used to it now.
Don't scream anymore.
I'm not listening.
Iv 'e died so many times.
I'm used to it now.
so, I'm dead now.


Details | I do not know? | |

Addiction

There was a boy that never knew. 
The poor thing never had a clue. 
Smoking blunts everynight.
Not even trying to put up a fight.

There was a boy that never knew. 
The poor thing never had a clue.
Drinking until the bottle was dry.
Laying on the floor wanting to die. 

There was a boy that never knew.
The poor thing never had a clue. 
Losing everything he ever had.
Looking ever so sad.

There was a boy that never knew. 
The poor thing never had a clue.
He lost everything to his addiction.
Now his life is like a book of fiction.


Details | Rhyme | |

Misery's Intro

Nothing can save me, Nobody would try.
For I cannot see, through teary eyes.
My heart is bursting through my chest, I will fall to pieces.
I tried to beat all the rest, but sorrow releases.
Now that your gone, I dance through life.
These words you choke upon, cut them out by knife.
Pause..., Listen to the misery play out.
For thats my cause, when I scream and shout.
The tears fall, off your face. 
When you call, and apologize, what a disgrace.
I feel so numb, my warmth slowly fades away.
Yet I feel so dumb, when I said I would stay.
Can anybody help me, make things better?
Do you let be, the final letter.?
Welcome to Misery's Intro, we fight for every tomorrow.
I would expect you to go, when we first suffocate under words of sorrow.
Nothing could save me, no one would try.
I cant be set free, so I slowly die.
I tried to run away, to my safe place.
Another dreadful day, where pain won't erase.
I'm so tired of crying, do you laugh?
Still I'm dying, when i see our loving photograph.
I can no longer see,  so tear my eyes out.
Because "I wasnt me", this is what it is all about..


Details | I do not know? | |

Bathed In Blood

She laid in the luke warm water with her eyes rolled back...
sucking on her candy razor....
Forth from her mouth...her problems poored down....
Bathed in blood that was thicker...
Refusing to live anylonger she'll die without a sound...
She's begging for the afterlife as onix rain locks flowed like
a ghost over her shoulders tainted black....
A slash into once treasured creativity...
An unhonorable death caused by nothing more then self pity....

His eyes closed looking shameful towards the floor without hope...
His hands held together tightly as if he bothered to pray.
His hair beautiful as if he still had life touched by the lanterns soft gentle ray...
It dug deeply around this throat....
 pooring his problems out staining the rope..bathed in blood..
A knot  cutting off into a once loved company....
A thoughtless death...because life was lonly.

They pulled the trigger wih no regrets..
fear arises in shouting classrooms..
Carelessly shooting.....
Now only recalling of the lost sons and daughters..
things mothers and fathers never forget...
.tears they shed in there bedroom...
Bathed in blood schooling...
A bullet for cruelty...
A pointless death because of sensitivity...










Details | I do not know? | |

Gone

I seen you in the halls,
I may have talked to you a time or two,
You were in my History class,
You were always in a happy mood.
Then that day came.
I didn't think it would happen.
I am sure your parents didn't either.
You are gone, because of speeding.
I wish i could have got to know you better.
Maybe we could have been friends.
But when I heard the news,
I felt like I missed a great opportunity,
To get to know you,
To be your friend.
But you are gone, gone forever.
You will always be remembered,
From all the teens in our school.
The pain we feel for you and your family,
Will always be with us, for now you are gone.


Details | I do not know? | |

my love for you

Theres nothing I fear most than being next to you 
I think i'm scared senseless and acting a fool. 
When I look at your face I can see straight through your eyes 
I can't ask you questions without getting complete lies.         
I dream of you both day and night 
and spend time with you by the moon light. 
It seems to good to be true 
but I can't stop loving you. 
Theres hate in your eyes and a burning sensation in your heart 
it drops the smile on my face and moves us farther apart. 
I cross my heart and stop to think 
why your love for me is starting to sink. 
You'll always be with me no matter where you are 
but now you're gone so I guess i've gone to far. 
My heart is not pumping properly anymore 
its slowing down every day and i'm getting week and sore. 
I'm beggining to feel futile and I don't know why 
and I can't figure out why i'm starting to cry. 
I want just one last look in your eye 
before its over and time for me to die. 



Details | Free verse | |

attention

you are imagination____which is fascination turned Geometric Shape (the line 
connects_follow
it for it never ends) the alphabet forms itself, you see, each time the mouth opens 
and curves 
around in-between through each and every letter. it's okay, it's natural. it has been 
explained
and tamed and framed and stuck on the wall. 
dictators are loved. what makes them so wrong is
that the love they receive is merely FEAR and DISEASE looking for dead hope. 
the coping mechanism
i obtained wasn't anything new, nothing they haven't shaken their heads and 
sighed at before, 
but the strange thing was that i took it as encouragement.
YOU'RE SCARING US YOU'RE LOSING OUR TRUST YOU'RE CAUSING SO 
MUCH OF A FUSS
roll the eyes take it like it wasn't said, and haha, i told them to JUST WAIT (one 
day i'll be dead).
who is the winner then, i wondered, the murderer the suicider the homicider the 
normal?
i remember it all instantly, triggered and kept by the sound of a phone off the 
hook, a phone you
know everyone is calling- everyone is asking themselves as the call doesn't go 
through Is This It?
i like to be the storyteller, the one in front of the audience, keeping everyone on 
the edge of their seats
as the story's turbulence confuses and enraptures. ends are said simply, taken 
delicately, they under
stand after a while. they must feel so lucky, listening as if it were fiction and 
tossing it around
as something that could never happen. mistaken as 'too good to be true', and 
meant (please,
keepthisbetweenyou&me) abstractly as just the opposite. if the protagonist is 
victorious, the 
reality is that we're all doomed. it's okay, it's not meant for the logical.
deja vu, we've all heard this before, it's the TALE OF THE CENTURY which 
repeats and repeats
every following minute. they were heartbroken, you see, they lost their loved one, 
they tried
to stop her tried to KEEP HER FROM HERSELF &continued miserably thinking 
they were
justified. as i see it-- they were pissed that i missed the free throw.


Details | Free verse | |

My Confession

My Name: Unimportant
My Age: irrelevant
My Grade: Doesn't matter
My Self: Unwanted
You may stand there and wonder "Why?",
I have my reasons,
No-one knows and no-one cares,
Everyone has their own agenda,
But me,
Mine doesn't matter,
They might say they care, but they don't,
They say, "I love you," but it's a joke,
I care about me,
No-one else matters,
They don't know me,
You don't either,
Because my confession
Is my passion,
My outlet,
My pillow,
My way out,
And no-one understands.


Details | Rhyme | |

Loner

Degrading manners of a long lived past.
Shimmering of dirt.
And growing oh so fast.
Danger is the only thing to which I flirt.
Death and failure stands before me.
Pain lays behind.
"Fix this" I plea.
To no one in mind.
No one is there.
And I'm empty inside.
I shall pay my own fare.
And continue to pass all the people I have defied.
The love I pushed away.
Because I was just afraid.
The lies I lead from day to day.
And the toughness and "Gothic" things I have displayed.
What for?
What good did it do?
To have this hurt so much more.
Just to save you.
The energy I let into my heart.
Was killed out of pain.
Doomed from the start.
To keep this habit simple and plain.
To continue without pride.
Continue without adoration.
My conscience remains taught and tried.
Keeping my mind at it's foundation.
Remaining neutral against lust.
Indifferent and colorless to everyone.
But yet, at the same time, gaining their trust.
But submitting to none.




Details | I do not know? | |

In This Corner

I sit here in this corner.
It’s a dark corner.
It’s a corner lit by a single tea-candle.
It’s a small corner, 
But it’s my corner.

As I sit here in this corner—
Furthest from the door;
Furthest from corruption—
I think to myself,
“Why do I sit alone in between two walls?”

I hear a voice calling to me.
                            It’s calling me closer to the door.
                            It’s calling me half-way between corruption and my corner.
                            It’s calling me to a “balanced” life.
But I know where the truth is.
The truth is here in my corner.

I love this corner.
It’s where I can be me.
No one is willing to listen.
My corner is my happiness.

                                                        To an outsider looking in,
                                                        My corner is my constant sadness and loneliness;
                                                        The darkness is my anger and frustration;
                                                        My tea-candle is my stubbornness.

The outsider doesn’t see that
My corner is my life,
The darkness is all the lies I’ve told;
My tea-candle is my last bit of hope.

The outsider sees my corner, 
But doesn’t see the frail me.
My heart has been shattered many times.
My eyes are red and swollen from crying.
My skin is pale, cold, and clammy.
I am curled up in a little ball FREEZING,
Waiting for someone to throw me a blanket.
 
I have waited 7 years.
7 years to trust a stranger;
7 years to be loved;
7 years for a meaningful hug;
7 years to talk and be listened to.

I sit here in this corner
Knowing no one really cares.
I sit here in this corner
Not understanding why I am still here;
I feel worthless and useless.

I pull out my secret bottle
I flip off the top emptying the contents into my mouth.
I wash it down with bottles of water.

I wait in this corner.
I wait for the pills to take me over;
I wait for my tea-candle to blow out;
I wait for the darkness to fall over me;
 
Why won’t it come!?
What’s holding me back!?
What’s going…
DARKNESS!
                            DARKNESS!
                                                        DARKNESS!

The tea-candle burned out.
                            My time has come.
                                                         I am gone.
                                                         I am dead to the world,
But I remain alive in this corner,
Where my thoughts and truth are.


Details | Ballad | |

THOSE BLEEDING SCARS

The young lives he violently took
and the blood he spilled
on his quick and armed hands...
are those permanent scars
for all who lost friends
or relatives in Norris 
and Johnston Hall
on the campus grounds
in Blackburg,VA ;
this is the deadiliest massacre,
after Columbine,in the U.S.A;
but what motivated Cho to buy guns?

The fellow student fired more than
one hundred seventy rounds,
and gunned down his own;
without pity or remorse,
he continued his unjustified rampage:
reveling in the premeditated carnage;
then he shot himself...
as police searched the floors!

What did he accomplish,
and what kind of anguish
he inflicted on his parents
and others who unconsolingly grieve? 
Did he do all that for a moment's glory,
or because was wicked and full of fury?
We may never know an answer...that   
he has taken to his grave!   

Those bleeding scars can be healed,
if some kind of forgiveness is given;
how can I say to them," Forgive him! "...
when he killed the essence of their dream?


Details | I do not know? | |

Broken Heart

A girl falls with a scream,
How badly she wishes it was a dream.
To wake up wake up without a care,
Anymore pain she cannot bare.
To feel the peace she felt before,
When she speaks she ends up on the floor.
He comes at her with a rage in his eyes,
All she can do is try to hide.
A broken heart that can never heal,
For she always feels the pain he conceals.
At once he grabs her by the throat,
Now all she can do is cry and choke.
The pain grows stronger with every blow,
She's all alone where will she go.
Then all is beautiful and bright,
All this Broken Heart can see is light.
A hand reaches towards her with such ease,
She is home now she can finally breathe.


Details | I do not know? | |

too young too ?

Screams erupt in the alley below, 15 years old, she had no where to go.

The baby is ready and well on it’s ways, to bad it won’t live through one day.

Her cries go unanswered, and then silence, when I here her say, “it’s a girl,” 

“My baby girl” Then her body goes limp in a failed attempt to look into her

Baby’s eyes, the baby feels the loss, she closes her eyes, and slowly she dies.


Details | I do not know? | |

suicide

When your mad you cut your wrist.
When your sad you slit your wrist.
When you cry you try not to lie but everytime you break down and cry.
You tell you best friend but she never listens.
You awake at night and tair at your eyes and think to your self "why am i here?"
You call your friend and shes stresed to so you both tell each outher the troubled 
truth.
You tell her you were raped and she was to but now the truth is revealed whats 
next suicide?
Your friend is pregnat and you are scared.
You lay in your bed scared to death.
He looks through your window and sleeps in your bed.
You can somethin inside you moving.
Very weary your in the dilivery room.
You teary weary mom is beside you thinking to her self "My babay's having a 
baby".
Whats next?
You cut your wrist untill you cry.
Whats next a big fat lie?
You cut your wrist.Whats that?
Suicide?


Details | I do not know? | |

Falling

She's scared to move
She's falling again
Remembers the feeling
Oh the pain

It's all coming back
Maybe to stay
I don't want it to
I'm counting the days

I thought it was over
Guess I was wrong
And to think
Its been so long

All this time
Just thrown away
All I can do is
Pray for better day


Details | Ballad | |

Cry a Little

Maybe if I run,
Never to return. . . 
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if I slide
The blade across
My wrist and bleed to
Death,
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if I die 
From that crystal meth,
You'll cry a 
Little.

Maybe if my world died down
Forever, and gone
For good,
You might just miss me. . .
And maybe You'll cry a
Little.


Details | I do not know? | |

Crash

Walking through the rain
Trying to wash my memories away
Trying not to think about moments with you
But trying to remember every single one.

Why did this happen to you
You never deserved anything close
My tears fall with the raindrops
I can picture your face, smiling.

Tragedies happen
But never, before, to you or me
I can still hear the crashing in my head
I need you here with me.


Details | Rhyme | |

Promiss Not to Cry

Crying in solitude 
hiding all my tears
the ones never seen
falling for unknown fears
Putting on a smile
mornings when I wake 
masking physical pain
living in disguise
Within my little world
Pretending all is right
if they only knew 
things I have to fight
Trying to make it through 
Another painful day 
know you need me around
mustering stregth I stay 
soon the time will come
when I have to say goodbye
each day is getting harder
Promiss not to cry...
your love lives in my soul
thats were it will stay 
I live in your heart 
watching over you EVERYDAY...


Details | I do not know? | |

lost forever

I am lost forever 
I have nowhere to turn
I have so little to offer 
but so much to earn

I live in a faceless crowd
and i still have seen no life
I am all alone forever
nothing but pain and strife

I can no longer take this
I am walking to the bathroom
I am opening the cabinet
Just to end the gloom

I am climbing into the tub now
I lift the razor to my hand 
I am closing my eyes now
can this really be the end

I think of all my misery
and I remembered all my pain
and then I held my breath
and I knew i had nothing to gain 

I felt the razor cutting 
the pain shot through my arm
MY head just started ringing 
As would an alarm 

Now the world is dark 
And nothing is the same
I got so sick of life
That i ended my life in shame

I can see all the faces now 
the ones from in the crowd
i can hear what they are saying 
they are talking oh so loud

Now i know what i did was wrong
My life was supposed to be
And all the faces are staring 
and they are all staring at me

people are everywhere 
crying over my choice
And now they will never understand 
They will never hear my voice

but if you think that death 
is the only way out 
think again my friend
because death aint what life is about


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost Love

I'm sorry girl 
I didn't know that you loved me 
We were friends so long 
I didn't know how you felt when you hugged me 
I said best friends forever 
You said me and you for life 
I said our friendship would never end 
I had no idea that it would cause so much strife 
I had a good feeling around you 
But you had a warm feeling around me 
Your heart had been torn 
And I'm sorry that I didn't see it 
You said you loved me 
And I said sorry 
You said you were fine 
But that morning I was really sorry 
I go to your house 
And see the docs and cops 
I break past the barriers into your room 
And then my heart just dropped 
The walls painted crimson 
Even though last night they were teal 
I look down at a corpse 
In your hands a steel 
I watched the ambulance take you away 
And I noticed a letter 
I opened it and looked 
It said: I wish I were better 
I loved you 
And you couldn't return it when I was alive 
I had no reason to live from then on 
I knew thereafter I just wanted to die 
I was so stupid 
I knew I had no chance 
You had your eyes on someone else 
Even when we went to the dance 

I read the letter 
And fell out and cried 
All this time you loved me 
I said no and for that you died 
This was my fault 
And there is only one way to solve 
In my water tonight 
I'll let the pill disolve 
I didn't know how much I loved you 
And now you're gone 
Well now I'll end this 
And finish my life's song 
We can be together forever 
And I can end this with a happy sigh 
As I lay down in my bed tonight 
And I'll see you when I die


Details | Rhyme | |

Permanent Solution

I've turned into all the things I've hated
Given up against the things that deserved to be debated
Lost trust and hope
With your hand tightening around the rope
I fall short of any relation
Digging deep for any sensation

This thing I see in the mirror
Gives me no love just fear. 
Wondering if this thing will ever mutate
into something I can learn to love and not hate.
I've dug deep only to become more unaware
of the things in life that remain so unfair. 

I listen for any call of arm
Before giving into harm
Too depressed to continue
when life proves to be more than a temporary issue
I can no longer stand strong
in a place where I don't belong



Details | I do not know? | |

No One Knows

No One Knows Who you are
but they see you from afar
They think you have no soul
Like you have no control
They think your mind is gone
Up until dawn
Then You Disappear without a note
Without a trace
you disappeared to some mysterious place
everyone wonders is this real?
like it is some big deal
Your family cries
Wondering with all the why's?
Your friends look into space with horror
Is he dead?
Is he alive?
Or did he just dive?
All these questions wonder and wonder
until they can go no further


Details | Rhyme | |

success destroyed contained

success of it could of been his
the one and only never here
always around but never near
breathe of wisdom 

conspiracy was always against
hating him for his words
screeching at him like birds
unfortunate tragedy

unlucky to be what he was
perfect in every way
dreaming of success one day
discriminating for his wisdom

unfortunate to be perfect
rumors of hate spread around
pushing further towards the ground
punishing him for being smart

crushing his hopes and dreams
and they throw him to the floor
waiting until the torture is no more
bullying him because they can

the teachers see but do nothing
watching his spirit diminishing
bullies were left  punising
protecting the wrong person

parents on the bullies case
victims of him never survive
each day goes there lucky to be alive
destroyed diminished relinquished

shout scream and yelling
they laugh at his pain  
there is nothing to gain
but they do it anyway

success life love and money
was in his future and dreams
worse than anybody thought it seems
might as well took his life

troubled with no where to turn
pain flooded through his veins
slowly driving him insane
victims understandable destroyed and contained


Details | Rhyme | |

Too Late

Laughing and giggling
 as we stumble out the door.
I hold onto the door frame
 to prevent myself from crashing to the floor.
Keys in hand, 
 I unlock the car.
"Jump in you guys, it's only a few blocks, we aren't 
 that far."
"No way!" one of my friends yells,
 "You can't drive! You are way too hammered!"
"Then you can walk and meet us at my house!"
 I stammered.
As we climb in the car,
 I hear my cell phone ring.
"Mom I'll be home in a second,
 don't worry about a thing."
I reach a stop sign 
 and slam on what I think is the brake.
But I only floored the gas pedal,
 I made a terrible mistake.
"WATCH OUT!"
 I hear from the passenger seat.
But my mind is such a blur,
 the brake and my foot never meet.
Into the window, I feel my head slam.
In the cold darkness I grab my friend's bloody hand.
My friends and I lie numb while we hear the sirens near.
"What have I done?" I whisper in silent fear.
"I am sorry to inform you that no one here survived.
Such a horrible wreck, a total of six lives."
I chose my own fate, I know it is too late.
We all would have survived, if we didn't drink and drive.



Details | Romanticism | |

Unopened Letter

If you’re reading this unopened letter
then I never could forget her
and had to end it somehow
She’s always with me in my dreams
She’s with me when I’m awake
It seems that her being with me for so long
just became too much for me to take

If you’re reading this tear-stained letter
then I never could forget her
I never can escape the grasp she has on me
No matter how hard I try,
no matter what I do,
she’s here with me inside my memories

If you’re reading this bloody letter
then I never could forget her
so I took the only way out that I could find
She’s always on my mind
She’s with me all the time
but as I’m quickly bleeding
I can rest at ease
for now I am finally free


Details | Rhyme | |

What Made Me

It's so cold.
With no one here.
Not so bold.
When you're some place you fear.
Passenger's seat to my end.
Almost seventeen years ago.
There's no reason to pretend.
My weakness will always show.

Not even born. 
And I lost my father.
Now, my feelings are so torn. 
Why should I care? Why should I bother.

Everyone tells me.
It's easier this way.
You never got to know him, you see.
So, it doesn't hurt as much. Missing him from day to day.
Yes, because I turned out for the better.
Because I know there are people who are worse off.
So I'm not locked with this fetter.
My pain, I can easily scoff.

And I don't blame the girls on the other side.
They have to live with the guilt.
Seeing how my father died.
And I see how their faith seemed to wilt.
They were my age.
Driving to a celebration.
So how could I feel any rage?
For them, I feel no frustration.

I can't be angry at my father, either.
I'm sure he's not thrilled.
Taking a permanent breather.
Being dead and killed.

People mistake my hardness for pain.
Mistake it for something it's not.
I've lived with this my entire life, at times, it's driven me insane.
And yes, sometimes, it does hurt a lot.
But I never met him, right?
Never got to know the man.
So why should speaking about it make my throat tight?
Wasn't this all just part of the "Plan"?
Yes, it hurts. And yes, I cry.
At times, I wish and pray.
That I would be the one to die.
Living with this from day to day.

But I always stay strong.
Appearing to be tough and independent.
Because, being impassive, is an emotion for which I long.
To be emotionless and distant.


Details | I do not know? | |

unwanted

unwanted child sitting in a room,
thrown away like a dirty dishrag that's been used
she feels discarded and unwanted 
alone in her room she sits there crying
feeling depressed she thinks about 
killing herself but thinks that's what 
they want me to do. I'm not going to
give them what they want.
she wonders if they will care
if they will cry or come to her funeral
or if they won't have a care in the world
once she's gone and out of the way
she feels like an outcast alone in the world
you wouldn't know it because she hides it
with a smile and has lots of friends
it seems like nothing is wrong but deep inside
she despises the world, she can't stand it anymore
and wants to leave it behind and forget 
her troubles and pain.

The next morning they found her note and
her body ling next to it
saying how she felt and why she did it, incase they where wondering
From above to her delight she was those who had
cared about her, but she wasn't alive to feel it.
unwanted child found someone who cared but, 
it was to late for her....


Details | Free verse | |

down in history

              i don't know which is
  right                  /                        left
out in the likes of [caution - dead end]
i saw the sign &
                        ran even faster to my
                           (obvious) destination.
WE'RE FACIN MASS DESTRUCTION__ dogeared
pages           age old rage still in
            date, still dripping with heat.
meet the parents [Ka-Boom] let me back into
my comfy tomb--
                            kay, but only cuz the flies
                            are getting in my eyes.


Details | I do not know? | |

sad little face

A lovely little girl With a life so sad
 She lost her mother 
And now lives with her Evil dad,

 Her sad little face
 Swelled up with pain
 Her tear filled eyes
 Cry out to be saved, 

Everday beatings all for no meaning
 Yet the little girl never made a peep
 She'd just lie on the floor And stare at the door
 Till her father went away

, Her sad little face 
Swelled up with pain
 Her tear filled eyes
 Cry out to be saved,

 Now several years have come to pass 
But the beatings still continue
 And her once lovely little face 
Now tells the story of her pain

, Her sad little face 
Swelled up with pain
 Her tear filled eye
s Cry out to be saved,

 Now there she sits so helpless
 Just waiting for that special day 
The day she set aside 
When she will take her life away

 Her sad little face
 Swelled up with pain
 Her tear filled eyes
 Cry out to be saved,

 She will never stop to think 
Of all the people she will miss 
You can call it ignorance
 But ignorance is bliss,

 Her sad little face
 Swelled up with pain 
Her tear filled eyes
 Cry out to be saved

, As she slides the blade across her arm
 She thinks to herself 
Of how the day has come at last
 When all of her struggles will end
 As she takes her life away,

 Her sad little face
 Swelled up with pain 
And all she wanted 
Was to be saved.


Details | I do not know? | |

It's not the time for it....

There will be a time for it,
A time for you to drink,
A time for you to smoke,
But not now so why do you smoke dope.

Everyone loves you,
Everyone cares, 
so why go and mess it up,
It's not time for you to experiment,
It's time to play,
football, basketball.

The time is near but you don't know it,
There's no time set,
No one will know but you.
After a while you'll realize the mistake,
but i hope it's not to late. 

So boy remember it's not the right time,
There's not enough time for it,
don't mess up that future,
Go after the gold and be the man you can be,
The man everyone knows you are.

I love you boy!




Details | Free verse | |

Written In Her Blood

Written in her blood it said,

 you're the reason why im dead

she cried , and cried, inside she had  died,

 blood stained the floor,

she was no more, 

written in her blood it said, 

it's all because of you.

the knife hit the floor, blood on her fingertips,

 imprinted on the knife

running down her wrist,

 was a shower of blood,

couldnt take the pain, 

going crazy , 

written in her blood it said, 

i hope u die too,

written in her blood it said, 

i did this because i love you,

i did this all because of you


Details | Rhyme | |

a beautiful suicide

All I wanted was a piece of beauty, to remind me what it was like. To be happy, to 
feel lovely, to have everything in mind. All I wanted was to have that dream, to be 
wrapped in love and lace and silk. But I was holding my ribbon noose,  waiting 
for the affects of your oleander milk.

Standing on the edge, practically devoured. I never thought there was such a 
feeling. To be hated, to be wanted, to have everything receding. Owned by the 
edge, controlled by your feeling. Your kiss is dry, but sweet, and I can feel my lips 
peeling back. 

Beautful suicide, completely my control. Feeling that everything falls into place, 
but I’m only sixteen years old. I love the glitter and the jewel incrusted eyes, but 
maybe the patterns are a part of your disguise. You tricked me into following the 
forest edge, now I stand upon the silver grass on which I sing my pledge.

Standing on the edge, practically devoured. I never thought there was such a 
feeling. To be hated, to be wanted, to have everything receding. Owned by the 
edge, controlled by your feeling. Your kiss is dry, but sweet, and I can feel my lips 
peeling back. 


What is it I can thank you for, when you slapped my mouth as if I asked for more. 
Is it thanks to you for pushing me, with pain to be all I can see? Is this the price of 
belonging to you, is this all we have left? Everyone’s gone, left to sing their own 
songs, we should have guessed.  

Standing on the edge, practically devoured. I never thought there was such a 
feeling. To be hated, to be wanted, to have everything receding. Owned by the 
edge, controlled by your feeling. Your kiss is dry, but sweet, and I can feel my lips 
peeling back. 

Sweet sixteen, can leave a girl tangled in her messy curls, only thinking it‘s gone. 
Mangled up, left lying there, asking why no one cares, about what happens to 
her. Sleeping in his room each day, asking god why it’s been me, that’s been left 
behind. Every moment passes by, leaving me alone to cry. Tell us what is wrong.


Details | I do not know? | |

That Was Then and This Is Now

You were a geek at times…and I was along with you…the times you cried I wiped 
your tears…the blood you bled I washed away…the marks that showed I covered 
with my love…the pain you had I felt worst…every laugh from you made me live 
one more day…the smile you showed helped me through the darkness that 
surrounded me…your eyes that were so indescribable helped my bad days…the 
heart you had helped mine heal…the life you lived made me realize how good of 
a life I have…the jokes you told pulled me through the day…the looks you would 
give me would make me want to laugh…the things you said and the way you 
were when I was so said couldn’t get through the day cheered me up more then 
ever…but that was then and this is now…now you are gone…I have no one to be 
a geek with…no tears to wipe…no blood to wash…no marks to hide…no pain to 
feel…no laugh to live on…no smile to light the way…no eyes for my bad days…
no heart to heal mine…no bad life to separate the good…no jokes to pull me 
through…nothing to laugh at…none of your personality to cheer me up…so that 
was then and this is now…


Details | Free verse | |

corrosive

morality -- insanity ; rip me from reality into an intangible mess of
          Do The Right Thing ___ said without words to the
bird who can't sing. i want to be a no one, a small
lingering whisper of a theory & hypotheses that are incapable 
of being tested for (truth _____ they lost it, i found it, i
put it back down, hating its feel in my fist).
one step away from argument, words resting in your dirty
mouth, a simple movement of the tongue away from
provocation ______ He was sentimental about His earth &
even when it expired & began to reak of law, He left it
_______ alone. some things don't develop past consideration:
it's taken too long to decide; eradication; everyone cried.


Details | I do not know? | |

TIMOTHY

You were only sixteen.
OH, how I wish this was just a dream.
You never saw that train.
At least you went with little pain.
You never heard the horns.
Now everyone mourns.
But, everyone understands.
God was calling you to your new homeland.
We'll miss you good friend.
But we'll see you again.
So, we take our tissues and wipe our eyes.
Knowing that you're still alive.
In our hearts you will remain.
Until we do see you again.


Details | I do not know? | |

Unanswered

I cannot think
Of the words to describe 
All of the hurt 
I feel inside

Insanity
And sadness
Self-conciousness
And madness

My tortured heart
All my pain
Can my hurt,
Be your gain?

Will I someday find the answers?
Or will everything stay a lie?
The only thing I know for sure
If this keeps up I will surely die


Details | I do not know? | |

All good

To have a feeling 
so strong 
you feel like no one cared
all along 

You run and run 
but you cant hide 
you cut and cut 
and adrenaline takes a ride 

You end up 
real messed up 
and all the stuff
just piles up 

more and more 
the pile seems 
to revisit 
in your dreams 

so you finally try 
to end it all 
the next thing you know 
your at the fall 

to die has been 
your wildest dream 
to wake up from this nightmare 
and scream 

your parents make arrangements 
for your own good 
the next thing you know 
your covered in a hood 

the food sucks 
and the pain kills 
your no longer the one 
behind the steering wheel 

can you do it 
get out and stay out 
help yourself scream 
help yourself shout 

you finally get out
and the feelings good
but was it worth it 
is it really all good?


Details | Free verse | |

frostbite

frostbite
touch of such
no more; too much-

rain came,
no breath; death
no less / confess


Details | I do not know? | |

Pieces

Pieces of yesterday.
Pieces of today.
Pieces forming under the pressure.
Pieces left to be buried beneath.
Broken down and crippled.
Broken up and torn.
Pieces of who I want to be.
Pieces of who I'll never be.
Pieces forming along the tide.
Pieces left to broaden the horizon.
Broken under the symbolism.
Broken over the influence.
Pieces of your intelligent insults.
Pieces of your ignorant curses.
Pieces forming your insecurity.
Pieces left to be dug up and burned.
Broken down against your will.
Broken over the willing.
Pieces of the past.
Pieces of the future that will never last.
Pieces forming to be destructed.
Pieces left to be formed.


Details | I do not know? | |

Love

Love me when I'm here.
Love me when I'm near.
Love me everytime.
You want me there.
Love the nightmare.
Love the way.
Love the prey.
Praying I don't see.
What you want me to be.
Love the hate.
Love your fate.
Love everything.
The stains will bring.
The way it taints.
Love the paints.
Love the shades.
Love my random raids.
You love me when I'm gone.
Love me when I'm in song.
Love me when I'm dead.
Love me in the red.
Love the ghost I've become.
The phantom that I welcome.
Against my will.
Love the empty fill.
Love the way you're killing me.
Love the emptiness you see.


Details | Free verse | |

much clearer

breath, don't stop, don't
come any closer
than you've come (here,
now) slide thru teeth
-how, haven't you,
what could- 
brood, mind, revel
; the shovel stands
scans the mud,
dances deeper.
stars sliced light
into eyes, much clearer
; please, night, 
trust, hold on tight.


Details | I do not know? | |

In Memory of Our Daughter

It's hard to believe it's been a year ago today,
That all your hopes and dreams were stripped away.
So strong and lively and sure of yourself,
Why you were chosen to leave us,
Is something we will always ask ourselves.
If only we would have known, that Friday would be your last day,
We would have held you in our arms and never let you go away.
We tried so hard to protect you, but couldn't that day,
For God took you by the hand and led you his way.
Now all we have are our memories to get us through the day,
As we try to remember all the funny things you would do or say.
We know you are watching over us and we'll truly never part,
For we carry a piece of you with us always,
Forever in our hearts.


Details | I do not know? | |

SADNESS

Sadness….
		Sadness is like a razor blade sliding across your flesh, watching your blood flow down
your arm.
		Sadness is your friend dieing in your arms, after he just took a bullet for you.
		Sadness is your father telling you that you’ll never become anything.
		Sadness is every joint you smoke to get rid of your pain.
		Sadness is the cool, slick feeling of the barrel of your father’s handgun against your
temple.
 		Sadness is wondering who will be at your funeral when you die.
		Sadness is the look of your mother’s face when she looks at your painless body.
		Sadness is the thought of pulling the trigger and ending your life
		Sadness is the voices in your head telling you not too.
		Sadness is, for you, not pulling the trigger.
Sadness… bang…