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Personification Humorous Poems | Personification Poems About Humorous

These Personification Humorous poems are examples of Personification poems about Humorous. These are the best examples of Personification Humorous poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Personification | |

A Tribute to a Major Appliance

Sub-titled: What’s in YOUR Fridge?

Please allow me to introduce myself:
My name is Ms. Fridge A. Daire
I stand tall among my lesser cohorts
and MOST of them really look up to me

However, I have two problems:
First, I’m FED UP with my owner
He's always opening my door
reaching deep inside (Oooh yeah!)
helping himself to my goodies
without EVER cleaning me out
or scrubbing me from top to bottom
Doesn’t he know a woman has NEEDS?

Then there’s that stupid stove next to me
who’s constantly flirting and making passes
Says he wants to ‘warm me up’ and ‘defrost’ me
bragging that I’ve ‘got the hots’ for him
which absolutely makes my Freon boil!
Of course, I always give him the cold shoulder
by freezing him with my famous icy stare
and responding, “Simmer down Four-Eyes"
followed by: “I don’t date shorter appliances"
But he’s always cooking up something else...

So I asked my owner to move me to another spot
He said he would if I wasn’t so heavy...HEAVY?
What kind of thing is THAT to say to a lady?
He also claims there’s no other place to plug me
PLUG me? Who does he think I am anyway?
I found it quite crude and vulgar...ANYWAY
I suggested an extension cord and he blew a fuse!
Geez, no wonder he’s still single...


Copyright © Tim Ryerson

Details | Personification | |


My finger hovers Shall I turn you on today You lie there tempting me I need to know what buttons to press But when I press those buttons You respond immediately and burst into life Every Wednesday you leave me little messages I try to ignore them but you are so persistent You want to update I want to write I press any key to continue And you ignore me and update anyway My husband is fed up with the distress you cause me He has a cunning plan to fix you forever ... No more automatic updates From now on you and I can live together in perfect harmony I can press the right keys to update you when it suits ME Now I am in complete control! Computer Poem Contest – Carol Eastman 29th March 2015

Copyright © JAN ALLISON

Details | Personification | |


I lie in bed dreaming sweet dreams
Smooth sheets caress my body
Curled up with the one I love
You gently call my name 
Whispering sweet nothings in my ear
Singing me the sweetest song
I turn over and I reach out for you
Don’t you just hate it when the radio alarm clock goes off?

Jan Allison
22nd August 2014

Copyright © JAN ALLISON

Details | Personification | |


You hold out your hand and reach for me 
I am the one thing you desire
You cannot wait to turn me on 
Guess you know the right buttons to press
I start to get all hot and steamy
I am the one to quench your thirst…
Where would we be without our kettle?

Jan Allison
21st August 2014

Copyright © JAN ALLISON

Details | Personification | |

Dancing Bears

giant bears
waltz: One, two, three.
One, two, three.
right on
Off they


Entry for Contest: Shall We Waltz?
Host: Kim Merryman

*in the Air Force we had a program for Airmen who were struggling to meet the physical fitness requirements, which we referred to in a sort of tongue-in-cheek manner as "The Dancing Bears" program.

Copyright © The Grahamburglar

Details | Personification | |

The smell

Im from over there
Im from him 
Im from her
Im from that thing there
I like to linger – especially under your nose
I like to hide in mouths, in clothes, in beds, in bathrooms, in kitchens in toilets
I come from nowhere, travelling by wind

Copyright © Alexander Seal

Details | Personification | |

Temptation in Black and White aka The Oreo

          (a poem a deux)

        The Oreo is there.
        Out of sight, it calls to me.

Oreo: Love! Come to me. Pleasure awaits.
Me: No. Will power! I will not succumb.
Oreo: Think of chocolate...tongue-lingering, senses-reeling, so appealing...
Me: I am stronger than chocolate.
Oreo: Beneath the surface lies cream. Pure, unadulterated cream.
Me: I have a new book to read.
Oreo: Love, be reasonable. You know you want me.
Me: I don't.
Oreo: You do.
Me: Don't.
Oreo: Do.
Me: Don't.
Oreo: Do.
Me: Don't, don't, don't!
Oreo: (seductively) Milk.
Me: (groan)
Oreo: I adore bathing in milk. It makes me so soft, so vulnerable, so wet.
Me: No! Not there. Don't touch me there!
Oreo: A veritable orgy of ecstasy in your mouth.
Me: O stop! Don't! Stop. Don't---stop---don't---stop---don't stop.
Oreo: My love!
Me: Wait for me, I'm coming. O God, I'm coming!

Copyright © Mary Oliver Rotman

Details | Personification | |

End of Story

Positioned at the end of a line
Between one line and another
Preventing confusion and clutter
A traffic cop
Signaling to stop
Fewer mistakes made
If more attention paid
The sentence not written by me
I knew where I should be
End of story...period

Copyright © Barbara Campbell

Details | Personification | |

I'm Okay Being Cold--A Tribute to a Major Appliance

I used to be called ice box.
To protect my integrity, I need to be cold.
At any degree, I am o.k. with myself.
Made of steel; I am strong.
To move me, would be difficult.
Any tears are now frozen within me.
What is inside of me remains good and safe.
See the light and
You find things of substance and value there.
I do not mind being called frigid.
If I should break down;
You would be sorry,
Not able to feed your needs.
You use me and take me for granted.
I have been here at your convenience, 
To get what you want!

Copyright © Barbara Campbell

Details | Personification | |

A Refrigerator - for Contest

I was made in the Antarctic
and they filled my freezer with its ice, 
enough to last 
until I reached the shores of France.
I had more ice then,
but it was dirty - not my style.

They put me in a selling place -
they call it "magasin" in French -
or you would say, a shop.
Then came excitement - a nice buyer!
She looked me up and down
and bought me quick.

And so I sit inside her home
as a South Pole treat.
I like to feed my owner wondrously!
She'll eat frozen peas today at lunch. 
I wonder how she'll woo them
to her teeth.

Copyright © Julia Ward

Details | Personification | |

Cracked Head

My car needs a Tune-Up,
time to see the mechanic.

I arrived at the shop late,
waiting in a long line I began to panic.

I then take a seat,
resting my feet.

After thirty minutes of sitting,
the line had gone down.

My ticket is turned in,
the mechanic approaches me.

I also see another man,
walking behind the mechanic.

"Is my car okay?"
I asked the mechanic.

"I did you a Tune-Up."
 He said.
"But you have a cracked head."

The other man that walked behind said.
"I don't know this lady,"but can I have a dollar?"

The mechanic took a good look at the man,
and said.

"You don't know her,"
but I know you."

"You are the same one that robbed me,"
you and your Get-Fresh-Crew,"
rumor has it,"you are a crack head!"

"Wait here for a minute,"I will be back."
The mechanic said.

Me, I did not wait around,
I knew what time it was,
for my cracked head repairs.

Apparently, my car repairs was done
on the same day anyway.

The mechanic did a banged up job
on the cracked head. 

Copyright © Amy Walker